Crave
by taoist elf
Summary: Moving to Forks for her senior year, Bella finds a very different Jacob than her sunny, extroverted best friend of the past 17 summers. Taking the concepts of Twilight and spinning them with a dark realism and emotional depth, this is the tale of the havoc that Phasing wreaks on the Rez's young Pack, where youth evaporates in the fires of duty and even love is cursed.
1. Weakness

**Pairing**: _Jacob/Bella_

**Genre: **_ Angst/Romance _

**Rating**: _M_

**Summary**: Moving to Forks for her senior year of high school, Bella finds a very different Jacob than her sunny, extroverted best friend of the past 17 summers.

Taking the concepts of Twilight and spinning them with a dark realism and emotional depth, this shortish story will explore the havoc that Phasing wreaks on the young men of the Rez where youth evaporates in the fires of duty and even love is cursed. _  
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**Pre-Reader:** Tayjayfan **Beta**: _None (as you will undoubtedly see)_

**Disclaimer: **_All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

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_ I'd been doing a bunch of reading and couldn't find a fic that scratched a particular itch just right for me so I thought I'd give it a try. I want to see what an Alpha Jacob would really be like with a setting/reactions/psych that was actually realistic. This is what I came up with. It's dark, but I'm an HEA girl. Hopefully it's an enjoyable exercise for you too. _

Sometimes people use music.. but this fic was partially inspired by two of my all time fave poems - the first one for this chap has pronouns changed because the original Rilke poem is about a girl.

**Prereader: **Tayjayfan She convinced me that this is actually interesting/passable enough to post.

All typos belong to me alone… if I sold them a penny each I'd be rich.

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**The Grown-Up**

All this stood upon him and was the world  
and stood upon him with all its fear and grace  
as trees stand, growing straight up, imageless  
yet wholly image, like the Ark of God,  
and solemn, as if imposed upon a race.

As he endured it all: bore up under  
the swift-as-flight, the fleeting, the far-gone,  
the inconceivably vast, the still-to-learn,  
serenely as a woman carrying water  
moves with a full jug. Till in the midst of play,  
transfiguring and preparing for the future,  
the first white veil descended, gliding softly

over his opened face, almost opaque there,  
never to be lifted off again, and somehow  
giving to all his questions just one answer:  
In you, who were a child once - in you.

_By Rainer Maria Rilke  
Translated by Stephen Mitchell (with pronoun change) _

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**Chapter 1 - Never Show Weakness**

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Jacob tore through the damp silent forest, paws beating a dark frenetic rhythm on the leaves. Not a bird or an insect dared whisper; the air was saturated with the dark viscous promise of death.

'_Jared, Quil! She's fucking headed for the shore!'_ he bellowed through the Pack mind.

'_Got 'er chief,'_ Jared's calm monotone shimmered like heat on pavement.

Baring fang, Jacob snarled as he leaped a ravine, flashing yellow eyes myopically focused on the vibrant red that flashed through the trees like a matador's cape. That repulsive rotting scent billowed behind the willowy figure and sent scalding adrenaline burning through his veins.

'_Make noise!'_ Jacob's command was immediately met with a twisting chorus of howls.

Now she knew; her pursuers were heading off her attempts at a watery escape. She nimbly switched course, leaping into a tree and scaling it like a monkey on a wire before soaring to the next and the next, high in the canopy above their heads.

_Fuck! She's airborne!_ Jacob roared, gnashing his teeth in fury.

His wolf lunged up the trunk in pure frustration after her, his claws madly grating the bark in a flurry of shavings. He fell heavily back down, twisting around at the last second to land on four paws with agility that defied his size. Muzzle tipped up, he galloped after her, rabidly snapping his jaws. That scent… it drove them all wild.

For several moments dead silence swallowed the Pack mind like a vacuum, not so much as a stray thought daring to breathe. Only their Alpha's agitated chuffing was heard over the rustling leaves on the forest floor and crackle of branches high above as their prey desperately scrabbled limb to limb.

'_Yessss…. fuck yes_,' Jacob murmured, as a low approving growl rumbled in his animal's barrel chest.

She was headed for the meadow, and therefore running herself quickly into an aerial dead end. Of course, that also meant she'd be yards away from the fucking Cullen treaty line.

'_It's okay, s'alright_,' he soothed himself (and his Pack) as indignant rage buckled through his gut. '_She'll never make it.'_

Snout in the air - and heedless of rock and terrain underfoot - Jacob scrambled from trunk to trunk, glancing up ahead and calculating possibilities.

'_Yeahhhh…. we got this cunt,'_ he crooned, low and slick and deadly. '_Embry! Phase and climb! Flush her out!'_

A soft wet pop behind him left a gaping hole in the mental tapestry that he subconsciously monitored even in his dreams. Whenever wolves were Phased, Jacob was there - watching, always watching.

'_Fall in! Fall in!'_ he whooped, lifting his muzzle to the overcast skies and loosing a long earsplitting howl. A battle cry.

The second Embry had scaled a tree after her, that bitch had started leaping haphazardly, frantically, a feral hiss of desperation falling down over them like the rain.

But the bitch didn't stand a chance… everyone was in place.

Jacob could both feel and hear Jared and Quill thundering up from the coast. Paul never needed prompting - he had a sixth sense about this shit - and as their best was more than enough on that end. He was pacing ahead in the meadow, snarling like the rabid dogs they all were.

As Embry's huge human body leaped and landed in an ungainly scrabble against another tree trunk, the elm swaying with his weight, the demon sprang lightly to her next perch and paused. The expression on her face showed she knew: the Pack was closing in on her like a noose.

'_Game's up, sweetheart,'_ Jacob chuckled low, a lupine growl bouncing in his chest.

The vampire made a desperate bid to switch direction away from the meadow and fell two branches with a screech and a crash.

Attention focused like a laser on his flailing prey, Jacob surged up with powerful haunches and phased at the twenty-foot apex of the thrust. Human hands grabbed onto branch and trunk propelling him further as a high squeal reverberated through his ear like fingernails on a chalkboard. He seized a slender ankle in his fist and yanked with all his might. For a second, she tugged along his 6'7" frame before the branches bowed with their weight.

The next instant, they went crashing to the forest floor while Jacob held her and the girl piteously wailed.

His Pack was waiting.

Hitting the ground with a thunderous boom, Jacob rolled twice, stopping the momentum with the Phase. Pushing up onto four paws, he whipped around with a vicious snarl that sent foaming spittle flying like snow. His Pack had descended on their kill, savage snarls boiling the air over the female screams of pure unmitigated terror.

'_MINE!'_ he roared at the brutal flurry of fur that was growling over their prey, chunks of white flesh flying like woodchips in the exuberant melee_. __**'MINE!'**_

In a wicked pounce, he was in the middle of the fray, three massive bodies peeling back from their Alpha's attack. He snapped at Paul's wolf who was still gnawing on a shoulder, nipping at an ear and drawing blood. With a contrite yowl, his Pack mate cowered and shuffled back, belly to the ground even while his yellow eyes stayed hungrily locked on their victim.

Tearing his attention from Paul, Jacob's searing gaze fell on his prey. He lifted his muzzle from canines in a snarl as he prowled toward her.

The girl was now whimpering, futilely scrabbling with her ruined stumps of limbs. Her red eyes were wide - _frightened_, he realized - and her lips were trembling. She couldn't have been more than twenty when she died. The first time. Her clothes had been ripped away baring one perfect milky breast and the delicate bones of her shoulders. She'd have been no more than 5'6" and 125 lbs wet and she'd been beautiful - with long curling locks of vibrant red hair and smooth porcelain skin. Smooth, creamy skin …like Bella.

Jacob blinked hot yellow eyes and lowered his massive head threateningly as a savage snarl tore from his lips.

"P-please…" she pleaded, her soprano was high and breathy as she shook her head back and forth, her torn strawberry locks plastered to her face with the rain.

Jacob's paw slammed her down square in the middle of her chest, pinning her pitiful limbless attempts at flight. Her head slammed back to the ground and she pulled her quivering lip into her mouth with a sob. These demons looked so real, so innocent and… _human_. But that sickening scent burned through his nose and sent fire through his veins roaring through his body like an unstoppable red tide.

With a snap of jaws, he tore off her face.

And gave himself in to the animal.

Ripping apart and shredding the body under him as his wolf growled with unadulterated glee, he didn't stop until there was nothing left that even _resembled_ human anatomy.

"It's done, Jake," Embry's human voice was low, soothing.

The wolf lifted its head from its frenetic search for more chunks of flesh.

Jacob met his brother's eyes and blinked, struggling to push down that suffocating mandate… that iron-clad impulse to decimate.

"It's actually easier if you don't take it _that_ far, dude," Quil's gawky laugh cackled through the silent forest.

Jacob turned to where the rest of the Pack was Phased back to human and standing … a safe distance away.

"We're gonna hafta strap a fuckin' broom to our legs, Chief," Paul drawled from where he was leaning against a large oak and digging dirt out from under his nails. He looked up from under his lashes and his lips twisted in a wry smirk.

Blinking again, Jacob shoved down the beast with an obdurate hand and Phased, seamlessly straightening to two feet. He was standing in the middle of a twenty foot radius of nothing but white hamburger meat.

Shoving a hand through his short hair he turned his back on them all.

"Torch it," he hissed. With no other word, he strode into the woods. His shorts had been shucked from his leg in the chase - as usual - but the others had obviously kept their pants on, so to speak. His nudity didn't bother him in the least and he needed the time as a biped to gather scattered human thoughts in the relative private.

He listened behind him to the Pack making lame attempts at banter as they scooped up vampire confetti off the sodden ground.

"One more ho' bites the dust," Paul laughed.

"Paul's our secret weapon," Quil guffawed. "One look at him…"

He never got the rest of that sentence out before he was howling in pain.

"I hate it when they talk," Jared murmured quietly, letting off some earnest steam to Embry no doubt.

And those words cut right to the heart of things with a visceral knife. A flashback of the girl burned through his mind's eye - filthy, torn and frightened… struggling to scrabble back with her ruined limbs. Jacob's stride didn't so much as falter.

Until he was sure he was out of sight.

Catching himself on a large oak, he leaned his forehead against the mossy bark while his heaving breath struggled to play catch up.

He hated when they spoke too.

Pressing his lips together, Jacob closed his eyes. It was such a mind-fuck. This was only the third leech they'd caught travelling through their territory. The other two had been male. He knew she was nothing but a demon masquerading under the guise of a frail and feminine human form and that the girl - the real girl - had died long ago. But still the thing obviously had feelings - despair, terror, pain. It was a sentient nightmare. A monster.

And not so different from himself.

Just a little over a year ago, Jacob's humanity had been stolen from him in a fortnight: from fever to growth to a bone-breaking explosion into beast. The transformation had been nothing short of brutal. Perhaps more frightening, he'd watched the reflection in the bathroom mirror change in mere weeks from a 16 year old boy to a twenty-something year old man. Yet even still, it was the change in his eyes that was the most shocking - he could tell by way his father avoided them.

Sam had phased first as it had taken Jacob a month to catch up to the older boy's maturity; in this particular case age trumped bloodline. But not for long.

In the four short weeks it took Jacob to catch up, Sam had imprinted on his fiancée's cousin and ripped into her: he'd wanted her - pure and simple - and he hadn't understood _why_ or _how_ she'd refused him. Sam had lost control with his imprint and subsequently lost his mind.

Jacob's first task as a new wolf and Alpha was picking up the pieces.

And so, technically barely old enough to legally drive a car, Jacob had found himself holding three older men together when life as they'd known it had been irreparably blown apart. Jared had been a jock with an easy childhood and promising future, Paul had already endured the worst humanity had to offer and Sam had been alternately suicidal or homicidal depending on the day. Jacob had born it all like his lineage and inheritance demanded, but the price had been exorbitant: something deep and central had been broken by the blunt-force trauma.

He'd never be the same.

Those stories they'd all been told around the campfire were nothing but nightmares couched in fairytales; a shameless bid to indoctrinate victims into complying with a fate they otherwise would've reviled.

But like he'd always done, Jacob stepped up. In the next months he'd succeeded in doing the unenviable: he'd initiated his two best friends into this hell, held the Pack together - when he himself wanted to fall apart - and coaxed a scarred and frightened Emily into accepting her fate.

Yes, even _love_ was scripted by the ruthless hand of their inheritance. Imprinting had been romanticized to seduce hapless victims to happily accept their fate: Sam and Emily, Jared and Kim, and Quil and 14 year old little Claire. A hundred years ago maybe it was _natural_ to consider a teen as sexually mature and a viable vessel for the next generation of progeny. But Jacob had seen the imperious mating compulsion - the "imprint" - first-hand and there was _nothing_ natural about it now.

Emily was already three months pregnant - though her doctor had advised her to wait at least a year. It affected the girl, it seemed, just as much as the guy: by Emily's own admission she couldn't seem to remember to take her pill. Jacob had quickly ordered Sue to give the other two girls the depo shot - even an Alpha order couldn't keep the boys in socks. Thank all that was holy that the wolves were only fertile with their chosen mate - otherwise Paul would have a harem of pregnant conquests by now.

A long, agitated howl peeled back the afternoon and yanked Jacob back to the present.

_Sam._

Pushing off the tree, he opened his eyes to the somber darkening forest and shook off the tremors in his hands like rain. The acrid scent of burning leech wafted heavily on the breeze and Jacob glanced over his shoulder to the purple haze swirling through the trees.

"To the house!" he yelled, and then he dove into a Phase.

On four paws, he cantered toward Sam and Emily's house as the remaining wolf's silent agitation twisted and churned in his gut like a serpent. Had he not ordered Sam silent, the hunt would have been set to the soundtrack of the half-crazed mantra of Emily's name. Even still he could feel it mute and muffled in every beat of the black wolf's heart.

'_She's safe, Sammy,'_ Jacob mentally soothed, velvet over steel. '_We killed it.'_

Emily might wear her scars on her face, but Sam's were just as maiming and buried deep inside. He'd never fully heal from having injured his imprint and even now he always needed to be near her side. Jacob therefore charged him with "civilian duty" making him patrol no further than the rural backwoods of the Rez. In a fight like this, he guarded the women - forced to submerge his innate aggression into protective defense. It was too much for him still.

Jacob heard his Pack sprinting on two feet to catch up with his casual loping stride.

"How's he doin'?" Embry asked quietly as he fell into step with his leader.

Jacob's yellow lupine eye cut over to his friend with a yip. It was a rhetorical question - they both knew how Sam was doing: not good.

"Fuckin' sissy bitch," Paul snorted.

Without warning, Jacob spun on a dime and the air roiled with his savage barking snarl. With exacting aim - and in less time than he could blink - Paul was pinned to the ground by his hulking russet Alpha. The man's eyes were wide as saucers, his face plastered in an mask of unmitigated shock.

Jacob's muzzle peeled back from his teeth as he seamlessly Phased with a hand on the interloper's throat. "You. I've had just about as much as I can fuckin' take of you, Lahote," he ground out.

Paul swallowed thickly and Jacob felt his Adam's apple struggling against his crushing palm. Left over from the human scrapper he'd been, Paul was a valued and fierce fighter. Jacob knew both the gifts and advantages of each of his men but, perhaps even more importantly, he also knew their weaknesses. Paul's was lack of discipline - he had to be ruled by an iron fist.

"Keep that cock-sucking mouth shut, or I'll shut it for you," Jacob sneered. "_Then_ how would you get laid, huh?" He pushed up to one knee on the man's chest as Paul submissively turned his head to the side to bare his neck. "Certainly not with this fuckin' ugly face," he chuckled, slapping his cheek and then pinching his jaw to turn him back to face him.

Jacob gaze bore into the man's eyes with heat as his voice again grew serious. "Pack's Pack. And I don't want none a' your shit. Sam's doing his best," he released his face and smoothly unfolded to his feet. "Just wait 'til your turn. I pity the girl who's gonna be _your_ imprint."

Paul gave him a curt nod, still not daring to move.

Jacob wordlessly turned, ignoring the timorous gazes cutting up at him from under bowed heads as he strode past them all with shoulders squared and head high. It was all a game - a game he'd been born for - and Jacob played it very well. And rule number one (two, three and four, for that matter) was: _Never show weakness._

_Ever_.

"Gimme your shorts, Paul," Jacob barked. In mere seconds, with no questions, Jacob snatched the whizzing pants from the air. "Don't phase. Wait here," he ordered in clipped tones that told Paul he still wasn't in the clear.

In two steps, Jacob was pulling up the elastic shorts as he continued to stalk toward Sam and Emily's back yard, the rest of the Pack now trailing behind him at a far more deferential distance.

He broke the tree line just as the black wolf came charging toward him with a ferocious and antagonized snarl.

"Stop," Jacob commanded, his voice low and silky.

The beast skidded to a halt and then bared it's fangs.

And Jacob took stock. Sam's flanks were quivering, his muzzle dripping with foam and the girls were peering fearfully out of the back kitchen window. Jacob raised a reassuring hand and Emily nodded.

But the movement agitated the skittish animal, and it launched into frenetic pacing, back and forth, between the Pack and the house while snarls grated the afternoon.

"Phase back, Sammy," Jacob soothed, clasping his hands calmly before him.

The wolf lifted his muzzle from gleaming canines, its eyes were wild and wide. Jacob wouldn't normally dream of allowing such insubordination… but Sam was a broken man. He hadn't made it an order - not yet - he wanted to give Sam a chance to overcome his instinct on his own. But so far the man wasn't making much headway.

"Sam…" Jacob warned low, taking a step forward.

Without a sentient thought in his yellow eyes, the animal charged.

"Get back," he hissed to his Pack as he fell to a defensive crouch.

Just as the beast pounced, Jacob leaped into the air, curling his body in a tumble over the huge animal's back and landing on lissome steady feet. The black wolf whipped around, his eyes frenetically searching for his prey. Jacob followed him with a deft sidestep, and used the position to dive both hands into the scruff of black fur.

The giant wolf howled and scrabbled as Jacob's thick thighs crouched low for leverage. Gritting his teeth, he yanked the beast into his side and tugged the massive head at an awkward angle, leaning into a felty ear.

"Stop, Sam, stop," he whispered, deep and breathy with Alpha compulsion lacing the dulcet tones.

Like a switch had been flipped, immediately the animal settled into limp gasping pants in his fists. Jacob marginally relaxed his grip and waited for the man inside the beast to recover.

"Shh… you're good," he soothed, releasing one hand to smooth over the wolf's bedraggled fur. Sam wasn't taking good enough care of himself these days - since the baby, he was more obsessively focused on Emily than ever. Jacob would have to speak with her about it and maybe get Paul to spar with him to release his aggression - it was literally eating him alive.

"Phase back, Sammy," he coaxed, still keeping a hand gruffly buried in the black pelt.

The animal whined.

"C'mon, don't make me do it," he pleaded in a whisper. Jacob used the Order as sparingly as he could - they all had so little self-determination left.

Jacob felt the man struggling to tamp down his beast as convulsions rippled through the animal in his hand. Agonizingly slowly, fur disappeared from skin, body metamorphosed, and limbs reformed with a crackling like rice crispies in milk.

Finally Samuel Uley was standing hunched over to the ground with his Alpha crouched beside him. Jacob's hand - now at the nape of the man's neck - melted from constraining to comforting as he leaned his forehead against Sam's sweaty brow.

"Sorry, Jay… I jus-… I-… I.." his voice was rough and bucking over suppressed despair.

Jacob just held him while the man's body trembled and his breath heaved and rasped, valiantly trying to contain his angst. Finally, at his audible swallow, Jacob pulled back a few inches, letting his hand slip down to bowed shoulders.

"You okay, man?" he asked as flippantly as he could.

Sam squeezed his eyes shut a moment and nodded and then looked up into Jacob's searching gaze with bloodshot eyes. "It's just Em.. I couldn't stand it if-.. I can't-.."

Jacob interrupted his desolate confession with a firm clap on his shoulder. "Yeah I know, dude. I know," he assured him, letting the hard edges of Alpha command subtly shore up Sam's bleeding heart. "She's good. _We're_ good," he affirmed, pulling back and his voice stretching taut with bolstering bravado as he straightened.

"And we all got us another fuckin' notch in our belts." He ended on his feet, pulling Sam up with him.

Embry could always be counted on for taking his emotional cues. "Damn straight!" he enthused, pacing forward and offering Sam an exuberant high five.

Quil's cackling laughter joined in as they bumped shoulders and fists. Jacob took several steps back and watched the four men try to subvert all their turmoil and heartache in exuberant machismo.

The door to the house ventured open and Jacob whipped around with a reassuring smile for the girl peeking out.

"Claire!" he greeted with the kind of blustering fake cheer no one ever dreamed of calling him on. "Get us two pairs of shorts, will you babe?"

She nodded briskly and disappeared into the house. Emily quickly appeared with a handful of clothes and a nervous smile as Jacob took several steps toward her, keeping his face frozen in a welcoming grin. He could feel the moment Sam saw her, and in a burst of air, he whipped by and scooped her up in his arms before her feet had even descended one stair.

Jacob watched the man cover the woman's face with frenetic kisses while she worriedly ran her hands over his face and shoulders.

Jacob laughed - it never sounded right these days, but any kind of mirth was a blessing. "Sam, put that junk in some trunks, dude!" he admonished while the rest of the boys cat-called.

Sam looked up, his face fatigued but finally somewhat human. "Em doesn't mind, do you?" he winked.

Emily just gave him a brilliant smile.

"Hey! Claire does!" Quil chortled as he crossed the yard toward the other two young imprints who were both blushing like plumbs at the show in the yard. Jared was hot on his heel and scooping up Kim in his arms.

"Sorry, girls," Sam called over his shoulder as he gently set his mate down, and obediently pulled on his shorts.

Sam took the remaining pair from Emily with a kiss to her forehead and then tossed it to Jacob.

"Emb? You mind?" Jacob threw it toward his friend. "The Rez girls already see a helluva lot more of Paul's package than they wanna," he called out to the woods theatrically (and subtly signaling that Paul was out of the doghouse - again).

"Jealous?" a voice laughed from the trees.

Their ragged little family was messed up - no doubt about it - but even so, it was all any of them had left so they clung to it fiercely.

"We should celebrate," Kim ventured quietly kicking her feet from Jared's lap on the back porch.

Eight sets of eyes snapped immediately to their Alpha, and Jacob plastered on a sunny grin. It used to be so easy to smile, but now it was just another one of many duties.

Without a word he leaped up on the porch and tugged open the outside icebox (that the Counsel solicitously kept well-stocked for a reason) and pulled out several long-necked amber bottles, tossing them around.

"Let's party!" he enthused, while whoops and giggles went around with the beer.

It was the last thing at this moment he wanted to do.

'

Luckily those things never lasted long. The imprinted wolves quickly paired off to fuck out the rest of their residual turmoil and Paul headed over to one of several ready lays he always kept queued in the wings.

Jacob and Embry walked alone back to their houses together just as the skies were finally opening up with a good solid rain.

"Damn, I'm glad to finally get the rest of this stench off," Embry sighed as he shucked water over his bare chest and biceps.

Jacob snorted and tipped his head back to the darkening dusk and let the rain shower a cleansing redemption over his face like tears. Moments like these were as close to true respite as he got these days.

The Rez was technically unguarded at the moment, but the scent of their recent kill should keep any wandering demons off their lands and Jacob's conscious for a while. Thankfully it only took Paul about twenty to bang a girl good but the imprinted wolves needed a good while longer to reconnect. There was no way he was going to send Paul and Embry back just because they could do it. He didn't like to give the imprinted wolves any preferential treatment; they went home to that every night any way.

They were all so tired… worn clear down to the bone. This was only the third vampire they'd encountered - other than that one meeting with the fucking Cullens - and it was a kill like this that made it all seem a whole hell of a lot less futile to be splitting 365/24/7 shifts between six wolves (well, five considering Sam's current state).

No, a few hours would do them all good, damn the consequences.

Jacob released a long sigh into the early rainy evening. Days like this made everything seem just a little more hopeless. _This_ was going to be the rest of his life? He had only just begun living before it had all been taken away.

"You opening up tomorrow?" Embry asked quietly, drawing Jacob from his thoughts.

"Yeah," Jacob huffed, tipping his face down and slicking the rain from his eyes with a gruff hand. "Gotta finish the Clearwaters' Chevy before the weekend."

Each and every one of them had dropped out of school last year for obvious reasons. His dad and the Counsel had supported him, Paul and Embry in opening their own car shop on the Rez. Sam had a landscaping gig and Jared helped in his family store. Quil leeched off his mom and contributed bad jokes and daytime patrols.

Embry licked his lips and shoved his hand through his wet shaggy hair uncomfortably. "She's coming in soon, huh?" he asked quietly. He'd obviously been waiting for the right time for this question; Embry knew how important she was to him - hell, he'd been friends with her too.

Jacob blinked twice. His jaw clenched and he returned his gaze to the road. "Yeah," he rasped.

The next few minutes were spent in silence as they walked down the gravel back roads. The rain spat down on them from the heavens and ticked against leaves and mud.

"Whenever I go though, I want you to come with," Jacob murmured, keeping his eyes glued to his muddy bare feet, trudging valiantly on no matter how much his heart wanted to stop. Jared was his second because he was the only one who commanded the age-earned respect that kept Paul in line, but Embry was his closest friend. His even, calming nature had been blissfully spared by his transformation and Jacob could think of no time he'd need it more.

"Sure, Jay," Embry whispered.

Jacob nodded wordlessly as he pressed his lips into a thin straight line.

_Bella_.

Every summer spent together over his life had been strung together to cultivate and culminate in undoubtedly his very best friend. Last year they'd only gotten a few weeks together before he'd started showing signs of the Phase and Billy had forbid him to see her without so much as a fucking reason why. She'd gotten some story about how Jacob had had to leave upstate for a family emergency though they might as well have just told her he'd died. Sometimes he wished they had, because the Jacob she knew was never coming back.

Over this last year, he'd voraciously read every increasingly worried email and text she'd sent him - and still they came regularly though he'd never once wrote her back. It seemed wrong to encourage her… to lead her on. In fact, he might have thought it better just to ignore that she was coming home, but he _knew_ that girl, better than himself sometimes: Bella would track him down and follow him around with that stubborn frown until he told her what was wrong. Just like she'd done that summer he'd learned Rebecca was marrying that surfer. She'd forced him to vent, listened without judgement, and stood by him every step of the way.

Jacob's lips flirted with a smile.

Bella was determined and committed and she loved with the whole of her heart. And make no mistake, Bella loved Jacob. The old one.

But not like _that_.

They'd been platonic yet loving friends - an unusual relationship for a boy and a girl - each wordlessly understanding not to push boundaries because they both knew that a summer romance wasn't worth risking what they had. Jacob had always hoped someday they'd have more and now they could have had it.

And Jacob had nothing left to give.

Jacob had been sure that pretty much everything in him had been broken, but thinking about the look of betrayal that he'd leave in Bella's eyes made him realize there was still a little bit left to pulverize. If Bella had ever needed his friendship, it was now. No one wanted to pull up stakes for their senior year and change schools - if only her mother could have waited one measly year before following her new husband. But Renee had never sacrificed a fucking thing in her whole self-centered life.

That had always been Bella's job.

Now when she was down he was going to have to kick her and break off their friendship. He'd planned to insinuate drugs, or gangs or bitterness and testosterone. Anything really. And all of it would have been true.

That's what his wolf was - a chronic and debilitating addiction. It flooded through his veins with a burning malignant mandate from which he didn't have the slightest chance of recovering. It commandeered his sleep and every waking moment; an obsession that crouched in his gut like the predator he was.

"So, dude. Tomorrow at nine at the shop?" Embry asked.

Jacob fished himself out of his turmoil and looked up to see his red clapboard house at the side of the road.

"Yeah," he grunted.

"I'll take your morning patrol… just chill," Embry offered.

Jacob sniffed a laugh; as if he could ever take a break - when they were phased he always heard them in his head. Protecting, always protecting. "Thanks," he mumbled, glancing at his friend.

Embry's brow was drawn over dark eyes swimming in concern.

He knew…he _knew_.

Swallowing, Jacob nodded curtly and turned up the driveway to the house. He felt Embry's eyes on his back all the way up on the porch but Jacob didn't turn around. Willing his hands to be steady, Jacob shucked the water off his face, and stomped a few times.

"Hey dad," Jacob greeted dully, as he pushed open the screen door. It clattered shut behind him.

"How'd it go, son?" Billy was watching the nightly news on their crappy CRT television.

"We got 'er." The announcement came out in a growl.

"Her?" his father turned his wheelchair as Jacob passed without so much as a glance.

"Yup," he quipped, popping the "p" and bordering on rude.

_Her_… long red hair, willowy feminine body, milky breasts, frightened eyes. _Her_.

Billy cleared his throat in subtle reprimand. "Any problems?"

The corner of Jacob's lip lifted wryly as he pulled open the refrigerator. "None you care about," he bit out tartly as he leaned down and looked at the sparse pickings. It looked like it was ramen and eggs… _again_.

"Now wait jus' a _damn_ second," Billy grumbled, his chair squeaking as he wheeled toward their kitchen. "I don't ask nothin' just for _show_."

Jacob squeezed his eyes shut in chagrin from behind the screen of the refrigerator door. He was being an impertinent ass, and he knew it. His relationship with his father had always been respectful and _good_… up until a year ago, but it was just so hard _not_ to blame him now. When his sisters had bagged out after their mother had died, Jacob had picked up the pieces and taken care of his old man.

And _this_ was his reward: the auspicious Black heritage.

His father didn't understand. Or he'd have prepped him, warned him… _something_.

Jacob huffed out a long breath and grabbed a carton of milk and straightened, throwing the door closed with a _thunk_. "Just Sammy shit," he mumbled.

His father cocked his head as his gaze narrowed and flitted briefly over Jacob's towering form. Jacob stoically stared him down in an outright dare to press for more. He wasn't in the mood to be charitable… hell, he was _never_ in the mood these days.

Billy drew in a slow breath and tipped his head the other way, folding his hands in his lap in that damn paternalistic way of his. "So, Bella's gonna be around soon…" his voice was fraudulently calm. Testing.

And his words cut clear on down to the quick.

Jacob glared at him. Popping the milk carton open, he held his gaze as he tipped the half gallon down his throat. Somewhere in the middle of the draught, his body's hunger reared its head and then he was gulping, dribbles of milk running in rivulets down his face onto his chest.

Billy chuckled lightly. "You should pour that thing in a glass, instead of drinkin' it like some kinda…"

"ANIMAL?" Jacob roared, slamming down the carton so brusquely on the counter that the contents were jettisoned in a milky spray across the floor.

Billy's eyes widened and he sat up a little straighter. He licked his lips. "Son…" he whispered.

Jacob ground his teeth together as he let his head flop forward. He wasn't usually so disrespectful. His body was still pumped with adrenaline and testosterone and whatever other freaky hormone cocktail came with this thing. He closed his eyes and took a breath through his nose and released it slowly. And then another.

The television blabbed on from the living room over the tense silence between father and son and a song came on advertising how cool Chevy Sonic's were for the new generation. A generation he knew nothing about.

"_Tonight  
We are young  
So let's set the world on fire  
We can burn brighter  
Than the sun"_

_How fucking poetic._ Jacob shoved a hand through his wet hair and grabbed a rag from the counter. He squatted and wordlessly started mopping up milk, his filthy feet catching his eye. It was a useless attempt at cleaning up; Jacob always tracked who knew what into their house. It was a fucking pigsty.

"Charlie called about the truck," Billy ventured, as Jacob moved to wipe the spray from the cabinets and icebox.

"It's ready," Jacob snapped.

"Yeah, I know," Billy murmured soothingly. "I was thinkin' you could come down with me tomorrow and bring it to her."

Jacob froze. _Tomorrow?_ Bella was going to be here _tomorrow_. A lump swelled his chest and climbed on up his throat.

He wanted to see her… and they all knew why.

He was fairly sure she was immune to this insanity (and an imprint) since she wasn't cursed with this heritage, so it would only be a down payment on the long inevitable heartbreak.

But some sick, twisted, revolting part him….

It _hoped_.

And they all _knew_.

What they _didn't_ know… what Jacob himself couldn't possibly fathom... was what he'd do if she _was_ the one. At that thought the lump in his throat dropped down like a lead ballast into the pit of his gut.

"I think it'll be good for you to see her, Jake," Billy continued quietly.

Jacob's head snapped up from where he'd frozen in a half crouch, balanced by one numb hand on the fridge.

"You need a friend," he whispered. "So does she."

Jacob barked a hateful laugh, his face twisting into something scornful and acerbic. "No fucking way," he spat. "Bella needs a friend like_ me_ like a fucking hole in the head!"

Billy's lips were pursing, he could see his father desperately trying to pluck out the right next thing to say.

"Look, I'll go… get it over with," he spat in amendment, sparing the old man the trouble. "But just to make sure she's safe."

"Son," Billy crooned, rolling one revolution forward. "You do that real good. You keep us _all_ safe." His rare gratitude was sullied with guilt and it was an ugly thing to hear. Maybe the old man understood just a little bit more than he let on.

Jacob's lips lifted in a wry sneer as he tossed the sopping rag onto the counter. "I need to make sure she's safe from _me_!"

With that Jacob spun around and stalked down the hall.

'

'

_Thanks for reading. Review if you like._


	2. Awakening

_This chapter yanks you between the perspectives of two characters who have very different internal voices and who themselves are rapidly changing. I hope the technique is effective. This chapter takes its time and builds.__ Hang tight._

_Prereader: The incomparable **Tayjayfan **_

_Let me know if I still have your interest and on all accounts, thanks for reading._

'

* * *

'

Sonnet XI

I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair.  
Silent and starving, I prowl through the streets.  
Bread does not nourish me, dawn disrupts me, all day  
I hunt for the liquid measure of your steps.

I hunger for your sleek laugh,  
your hands the color of a savage harvest,  
hunger for the pale stones of your fingernails,  
I want to eat your skin like a whole almond.

I want to eat the sunbeam flaring in your lovely body,  
the sovereign nose of your arrogant face,  
I want to eat the fleeting shade of your lashes,

and I pace around hungry, sniffing the twilight,  
hunting for you, for your hot heart,  
like a puma in the barrens of Quitratue.

Pablo Neruda

'

* * *

'

**Chapter 2: Awakening**

'

Bella's feet froze as soon as she stepped over the threshold of a room she'd known all her life.

Somehow it looked different. The walls were still the same faded cream that seemed soak up the dusky sunset purples and blues of the quilt and earthy accents. The posters and pictures were all the same - immortalizing her aesthetics in a timeline from finger paintings to photos to her first actually purchased piece of art. The same fairy lights were strung dim and ready by the rice paper lamp that swayed with the breath of late summer sighing through the house. It was all the same: a hodgepodge, patchwork tapestry of her life to date, somehow more intimate and authentic than the crisp, burnt sienna room in Arizona (and Chicago, Oregon, California and Nevada too). With all the many places she'd trailed along after her mother, Bella realized this had always been her only constant.

Here was her home.

And _that_ was the difference: this time it truly was.

Releasing a long quiet breath, Bella leaned against the doorframe as she let the duffle bag fall off her slumped shoulder to the floor. This time there was no quiet ticking countdown cinching the tightness in her chest, this time there was no steeling her heart to _let go_ before she even _had,_ this time she could truly settle into rote and routine…. this time this room was _home_.

For as long as she wanted.

Bella was a planner - perhaps it was because so little in her life had been predictable that one foot always seemed to be two steps ahead - but she could see herself graduating and hanging around for awhile. Maybe working for year or two or doing some online classes or community college in Port Ange. As soon as she crossed the threshold of the house she'd been born in, Bella knew she wouldn't be leaving again anytime soon and her entire body relaxed with a visceral sigh of relief.

Charlie's heavy footstep clomping up the stairs snapped her head back in the game from where it had been blissfully sidelined by the sheer bliss of permanence. (Well, as much permanence as a nearly 18 year old girl could really have.)

With a glance over her shoulder, she tugged the bag across the floor and sat heavily on the bed.

Charlie wrestled her two ungainly suitcases into the room with awkward and blundering aplomb and Bella's lips fought with a smile. She knew where she got her grace from. Or more appropriately, her lack thereof.

Charlie straightened, his face red and sweaty, as he rubbed his palms uncomfortably on his thighs. "So… uh," he began eloquently. And then thought better of it and pushed one of the suitcases unnecessarily further into the room.

Bella's smile broke through with affection. "Thanks, Dad," she murmured.

Charlie straightened again, blinking at her like he'd never heard her say a word in his life.

He was nervous, and it was endearing. "I mean, I hope I don't cramp your style or anything by being here," she offered.

"What style," he snorted, his mustache twisting up wryly as he reached up and scratched the back of his neck. "It's great having you home, kid. And I'm hoping you stay a good long while."

Bella bounced on the bed and nodded with a grin. She knew he liked having her around and honestly Bella liked having him around too. He didn't hover or encroach or demand she be sucked into his drama (like someone she knew). Bella had gotten her easygoing independence from Charlie after all.

Charlie's eyes darted around the room, and then he smacked his lips. "Well I'll let yeh…" he waved a flustered hand.

"Kay."

Clearing his throat, he shoved his hands into his pockets and turned abruptly, nearly tripping on a suitcase before fleeing for the door. "Holler if you need anything," he looked over his shoulder, meeting her eyes with an earnestness that belied the flippant words.

Bella nodded reassuringly, answering his silent questions with a smile. Only a quarter of a conversation with Charlie was verbal.

With no other word, he disappeared into the hall as Bella smacked her lips and thought about what to unpack first.

"Oh, and Bells?"

Charlie's face peered back around the doorframe and she looked back up.

"Billy's coming by around lunchtime with a lil' something I bought yeh," he mumbled.

"With Jake?" she pounced in, ignoring the fall of his face. He wanted her to be excited about whatever Billy was bringing, but Bella only wanted one thing. Or person, as it were.

"Maybe," he hedged.

"Dad," Bella stood, her brow furrowed. "What's _really_ going on with him?" she asked plainly. She'd gotten vague answers and evasions every time she'd quizzed him on the phone. And she was worried.

Charlie released a capitulating sigh and pushed into the doorway, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned against the frame. "Bells, he's…_different_."

Bella tossed her head in frustration at a repeat of the same useless answer. "What does that _mean_?"

Charlie sniffed a harsh breath. "Uh, I' barely seen him," he continued stalling and Bella emphatically widened her eyes, prompting him on. "But he… he g-grew up…." he stammered uncomfortably.

Bella huffed and crossed her own arms over her chest. "Uh… yeah, and?"

She wasn't usually so impatient with Charlie's inarticulateness but this was _Jake_, and, honestly, she was kind of going out of her mind.

He was the last lingering unknown in this whole change equation, and he was usually the one thing she could depend on. More than her room, this house, Charlie or Forks… _Jacob_ had always been her rock, her anchor, the one thing she always knew she could trust. And over this last year, it was like he'd suddenly disappeared off the face of the earth.

"Look, he's different, kay?" Charlie harrumphed, and as if his own anxiety had finally burst the dam, he continued on with information he'd withheld from her all year. "He never went back to school. 'Dropped out and s'working at a garage on the Rez. From what I hear he runs with a buncha tough boys down on the Rez, but he don't ever come to town anymore. He's _different_," he expelled that word on a sigh of frustration. "I asked Billy if he's getting worried, but he won't say nothin'. Same with Harry. It's like they don't wanna talk anything 'bout him. We ain't barely been hanging out either…and I don't get it," he shook his head as his eyes paced restlessly over the floor. And for the first time Bella saw it. She heard it in his voice.

Her father was worried too.

Each of his words just hammered nail after nail in the coffin of her worst fears - worries she'd been desperately trying to justify away in Jacob's absence from her life this year. Her father was an observant man - she knew this - but he'd also "seen it all" in his lifelong career and didn't get riled up by much. If _he_ was worried, then there was definitely something wrong. Bella's hands slowly fell to her sides as her mind furiously processed.

Charlie looked up and met her gaze, pushing off the frame and shoving his hand through his hair. "I mean, the few times I've seen him, he's just-…well, he's barely said two words. He looks pissed and …. and _big_."

She swallowed thickly. "Is h-he drinking?" she stammered quietly. "Or is it d-drugs?"

Her heart felt like it had stalled in her chest. Why wouldn't Jacob reach out to her if he was having problems? He'd had more crap in his life than most boys his age - with his mother gone and his sisters skipping out on him and his wheelchair-bound father - but they'd always leaned on _each other_ all their lives.

Charlie pressed doleful lips together as his eyes softened at his daughters obvious distress. "Baby, I dunno," he murmured.

Bella's gaze fell to the floor as she pulled the corner of her lip into her mouth.

Her father's shuffling step made her look back up. "C'mere," he held out his arms with a furrowed brow.

And that's when she knew just how bad it was.

Bella took the few steps into his arms and leaned her cheek against the rough starch of his uniform as his arms wrapped around her.

"Look, maybe it's not as bad as all that," he murmured into her hairline. "I know how close you two were an'-…" he sighed heavily. "I jus' don't want you disappointed s'all."

Bella nodded mutely into his chest.

He pressed a clumsy kiss to her forehead and then dropped his arms stiffly to his side. Bella took a step back as the weight of her worry again pulled her gaze to the floor.

"I mean, I know this year's gonna be hard…" he rubbed his hands uncomfortably on his hips. "You changing schools an' everything…"

Translation: he didn't want her to decide to go with Renee to Florida instead and it was probably why he'd avoided this conversation all year. But a new school, she could handle - she'd certainly had enough practice by now - but losing Jacob?

Bella shook her head briskly as she continued to worry the hell out of her lip.

"I jus' wish Jake was gonna be able to be there for yeh," he continued, subtly soothed by her silent reassurance. His hand reached out and hovered indecisively for a moment. Finally his warm, calloused palm cupped her cheek in a silent plea for her eyes.

She met his gaze and he smiled sadly.

"But Bells, I don't think he will," he whispered, his eyes unadorned and somber. It was the most direct he'd ever been with her.

Bella's eyes darted between his for a moment before she nodded once - a loose, wobbly movement.

Charlie's hand dropped to his side and Bella bit her lip. "Kay, well… uh.. " he cleared his throat. "Lemme get outta these Blues, huh?"

"Kay."

And with a final glance, he turned and crossed the hall and shut the door quietly behind him.

Leaving Bella standing alone in her room.

And for the first time, she really felt _alone_ here. When her mother announced yet another move in February, Bella had asked to come here instead. She'd be lying if she didn't say a big part of that decision was … Jacob.

Even though she'd started worrying about him in September of last year. He'd always been better with wrenches than keyboards (she didn't let that stop her from emailing _him_), but since middle school, but they'd never gone more than a few weeks tops without at least _one_ epic phone conversation. Yet, as of now, she hadn't spoken to her best friend for 14 whole months. Not even when she'd called his voicemail and told him she was coming home this summer for good. She'd left messages.

And texts.

And emails.

She'd never heard word. Charlie said he was different, Billy said he was busy, and Rache n' Rebes just brushed her off like an annoying little kid.

But if Bella was anything she was patient. And stubborn. And worried off her freaking ass.

Squeezing her eyes shut, she spun around on her heel … and painfully banged smack dab into her heavy suitcase. She clapped a hand over her knee and hopped a few times while her gaze drifted over her room. Trying to imagine this room without Jacob was simply impossible - he was inexorably woven into the very fabric of her life. From the ancient Polaroid of them as kids - her four, him three - proudly hawking mud pies… to the hand-carved menagerie of animals on her desk… to the goofy photo-booth strip from the Seattle mall, there was a piece of him in every single memory.

Bella limped on over to her bed and threw herself back spread eagle with a heavy sigh.

She wouldn't give up. Whatever he'd gotten himself into, she was going to help him get back out. He'd been there for her through Renee's occasional bouts of drinking and chronic parade of men, through mean girls and zits and boys.

It had only been a year, it _couldn't_ too late.

Could it?

Pushing her lip through her teeth, Bella's gaze cut over to the dream catcher hanging on the headboard and she reached out her hand. Plucking it from its perch with tender fingers, she sat up slowly as her eyes ran over Jacob's meticulous handiwork. He'd always had the patience of a saint and those agile hands were gentle and strong. Seeing the things he'd created was like getting to peek through those warm dark eyes that found beauty in everything. Even in her.

Pursing her lips sadly, she leaned over and picked up the framed picture on her nightstand. Taken last summer before he'd had to leave, it was a blown-up black and white photo of them both laughing their heads off on Charlie's front steps. His arm slung round her shoulder, his eyes were sparkling with mischief at the camera, his face cracked in half with a ten thousand kilowatt smile. Bella was grinning broadly at him, her hand resting on his knee over the frayed rip in jeans that showed his enviable caramel skin. They always naturally leaned into one another with an intimacy that could easily be misconstrued, but it has been so since they'd been toddlers in diapers. She adored that picture. It showcased everything she loved about their friendship: the laughter, the affection, the ease.

She couldn't imagine _this_ Jacob as the "pissed and different" boy who'd ignored her for an entire year. He was always so generous with his smile, his hands… his heart. He'd grown up and changed over the years, of course - hell, so had she (thank God) - but he'd always been her sunny tropical island in the stormiest of seas. It had been as easy as breathing being best friends with Jacob Black, and Bella had thought maybe - just maybe - they might someday be more.

Until this.

Well, one thing was for sure: she wouldn't abandon him when the proverbial crap hit the fan. He'd stood by her so -damn it - so would she. She was going to find out what demons he was slaying so she could bring a spear to the fight. Or maybe a shotgun.

Or an Uzi.

Bella's lips hitched up in resolve as she hung the dream catcher back in its place.

"I'm coming, Jake," she whispered to the photo as she set it on the nightstand with a determined hand.

One of Bella's more endearing traits was her stubborn naiveté.

'

One of the more useful traits about being a werewolf was the enhanced human senses. Jacob cocked his head as he listened to the faint hitch in the Chevy's timing belt - it just needed a little tweak to be perfect. And it was just the distraction he needed at Charlie's house.

Action, it was all about action these days.

One of the more _difficult_ parts about being a wolf was if he wasn't doing _something_, he felt like jumping out of his own skin. (Or gnawing off his arm -just for something to do. ) It was like having a continuous drip of Red Bull laced with Meth burning through his veins. It made him an effective killing machine, but a human? Not so much.

Jacob glanced in the rearview mirror at his father riding shotgun in the white Chevy with a delighted smile like he was out for a Sunday drive. In the driver's seat, Embry met his gaze intensely in the mirror with a subtle reassuring lift of his chin. At least his Pack was on his side while his father blithely blundered on.

Jacob readjusted his hands on the wheel as he blew a long slow breath out from his cheeks.

Distraction, he needed a distraction.

His eyes darted around the cabin for about the fiftieth time. Quill had done a good job cleaning the thing up, surprisingly enough. The antique was as pristine as it had been the day it had been rolled off the assembly line by Fred fucking Flintstone. And Bella was going to love it.

For anyone else, a rusty red 1963 Chevy Step-side would be a gift given wrapped in an apologetic grimace. But of all the cars in the junk lots that Charlie could afford (with Jacob's meager savings secretly thrown in for parts) this was the one that screamed her name: unpretentious, adaptable, quirky (and she just might survive if she wrapped it around a tree).

The Swan residence was just around the bend and Jacob shifted in his seat while his left foot sprinted into frenetic tapping. He drew in a long cooling breath through his nose and wished it did something other than fan the raging fire in his gut.

_This was it._

His breath sprinted in shallow puffs of air over his upper lip as his heart lunged into a race with this restless foot. A low metallic groan had him readjust his fierce grip - Bella probably wouldn't appreciate an imprint of his fingers in the steering wheel.

"Keep it together, moron," he growled out loud to the empty cab. He was the fucking _Alpha_, for crissakes - he couldn't fall apart now.

_Never show weakness. _Especially to himself.

Within minutes the truck's tires were crunching up on the gravel driveway of Chief Swan's modest home. A home that used to be as familiar to him as his own but now was looming before him like some portentous gauntlet.

With a quick twist of his wrist, he cut the engine - leaving the keys in the steering column - and jerked up the parking brake. It complained as he yanked up into the dangerous quick and Jacob grimaced; it was a never-ending struggle to temper his strength on the best of days and today was anything but.

Like he was leaping from a burning vehicle, Jacob threw open the door and jumped out of the cab. Immediately he was snatching up his tools from the bed and striding around the front. One hand found the release and pushed up the hood while Embry pulled in behind him. While his friend dragged out the wheelchair from the white pickup and helped his father into it, Jacob propped open the hood and tried to lose himself in the maze of metal and tubing. He knew engines like the back of his hand - both foreign and domestic but _especially_ this one - but at the moment, honestly, he couldn't tell the radiator from the oil well.

From behind him the front screen clattered open.

"Bells! They're here!" Charlie bellowed, making Jacob's sensitive ears tingle and his every muscle twitch and burn.

_This was it._

"I 'preciate this Billy," he was saying, as his clumsy step tromped down from the porch.

"No problem at all, Chief," Billy returned with that annoying knowing calm for which he was infamous. _No problem for __him__, no siree._

"Jake," Charlie grunted as he passed by him with a stiff spine.

Jacob's eyes cut over with a gruff jerk of his chin. The shuttered warning in the man's eyes spoke louder than if he'd yelled it.

Jacob _knew_ Charlie saw in him another boy lost to the Rez's dark side of adolescence, discontent and addiction that clung to oppressed cultures like a plague. And it was just as well.

But he wondered what Bella would see.

At Charlie's yell, Bella scrambled off the bed in the middle of the neat stacks of folded clothes, snagged her foot on the bedspread and tripped to the window. She caught herself against the wall and peered out over the front lawn at the two trucks parked in the driveway.

And her stomach tanked in disappointment. Jacob hadn't come.

Charlie had his hands on his hips, talking to Billy who was smiling up at him from his chair. He'd brought two huge men from the Rez along with him apparently - one was standing behind him, the other bent over the engine of an old red truck. Frowning, Bella leaned out the open window, craning around to see somehow she'd just missed him.

The one standing behind Billy had silky messy hair that brushed his ears and fell into his eyes, softening the hard features of his face and highlighting a broad smile. Closer to the house was the man peering down at the engine, his hands braced on either side of the truck. Head bowed, his inky hair was cropped closer and a black tee shirt was painted over ridiculously broad shoulders and the ripple of straining muscles in his back.

_Holy crap. _The guy was ripped.

Her gaze lingered a little bit longer over the lithe, smooth musculature that ran like railway tracks down to narrow cut-off clad hips. Bare feet - bare! - shifted on the ground making thick sinewy legs ripple in concert under smooth bronze skin. His form was powerful and defined yet somehow graceful like an elite martial artist rather than a guy who pumped iron.

And he was … well, to put it delicately… freaking hotter than hell.

Heat rushed to Bella's cheeks and she immediately dropped her gaze in chagrin. Like a high school girl, here she was shamelessly ogling the bod of the definite enemy. Both of these strangers oozed a conspicuous power, purpose and danger. _Trouble_, more likely. They had a certain cocky confidence about them and Bella was pretty damn sure they had something to do with corrupting her best friend.

She certainly wasn't going to stand by and watch them do it with weak knees. No matter how good they looked.

Her shoulders squared with determination and she turned from the window. Perhaps all wasn't lost, even if Jacob hadn't come. This was her first chance at espionage - to find out what the hell had dragged _her_ Jacob down. Getting a glimpse of what she was up against might be a little intimidating (or a lot), but it also just made her want to fight for him more (plus Charlie kept his rifle right inside the entryway).

Pursing her lips in a stubborn frown, Bella stomped down the stairs with purpose. She slipped into her flip flops at the front door and flapped out onto the porch, her duck-like slaps robbing much of her bravado. But she held her head high anyway as her tart gaze lanced into the back of the man hovering over the truck as she descended the stairs.

Predictably - with all the hard glaring - she tripped on the last one and stumbled several steps in the grass. Pursing her lips against the rush of chagrin to her cheeks, she soldiered on. But down at ground level she suddenly appreciated just how big that guy was. Holy crap he wasn't just big, he was _huge_ like some kinda kooky Goliath! At her respectable 5'2" and a half (thank you very much) if he straightened to his full height, she'd barely come up to his shoulder. The freak.

With a snort of disdain, she stomped past him, ignoring him the same as he did her.

"Bella, it's good to see you," Billy greeted with his usual serene smile as he patted the arms of his chair. How could he smile like that when Jake was in trouble? It made her blood pressure shoot even higher.

"Hey Billy," she returned curtly, letting her loyalty bleed as much ice in her tone as she could. She glanced up at her father who'd turned around - his amused smile making his mustache asymmetrical. But it seemed he approved of her tactics.

"So Billy here brought down this surprise, Bells," Charlie announced with a wink as he patted the tailgate of the red truck with a hollow plonk.

For a second Bella just blinked at him.

"I thought you'd need something that wasn't a cop car to get around this year," he continued over a chuckle at her face.

And for a moment Bella's indignation melted in surprise as she realized just what her father was saying. "For me?" she gasped, her eyes raking from bumper to bumper and then returning to Charlie's eyes with undisguised pleasure.

"Uh-huh," he grinned, shoving his hands in his pockets, obviously pleased by her reaction.

"Holy-…" Open-mouthed, Bella scanned the truck again. It looked like something from that old show Beverly Hillbillies that Jake and she used to watch on Nick at Night: kitchy, cool and unconventional…and certainly welcomed freedom at that. Freaking _perfect_!

Biting her lip wildly, she turned back to her father, barely containing her elation. She hopped once, her flip-flops slapping ecstatically on her heels.

"We thought you'd like it," Billy chuckled.

And then she remembered.

Slamming down her giddiness with an abruptness that probably looked psychotic, she turned back to Billy Black. "It's awesome," she bit out in a cool monotone that was at odds with her choice of words.

Charlie tried to swallow his laughter with an ungracious snort and Bella looked up and gave him a warning glare.

"Who's we?" she turned back to Billy with narrowed eyes.

"Hey Bella," a deep velvet voice pulled her eyes to the man leaning against Billy's truck a few paces back.

And she did a double take.

As they swept up and down his towering frame, her eyes incrementally widened until they ran out of room in her skull. That face…. she _knew_ that face. It was now hard and athletic and looked like it had been photoshopped to add at least a decade - maybe more - but his eyes were the same.

"E-Embry?" the word came out in a whimper.

The troubled shadows evaporated in his signature cashmere smile. "Yeah," he whispered, pushing off the truck.

Bella blinked furiously as she gulped like she was struggling to swallow a golf ball …or maybe it was her heart… who knew.

This was impossible.

Forget about _drugs_, maybe the government was experimenting on Quileute boys in nefarious secret experiments involving alien DNA. Embry had to be six foot-… well, six foot something-well-over-six-feet and every last inch was packed with muscle. Lithe, smooth muscle - the kind that took years of protein and steroids and personal trainers.

And he was _seven-freaking-teen_!

"Did you have a good flight?" the boy-man was saying.

She saw his lips move.

She saw Billy slap her dad and then book it out to the road in a playful race.

She saw Embry take a worried step forward, reaching out a steadying hand.

But Bella's mind was somewhere else entirely: under the hood of a kitchy, cool, and unconventional truck, to be exact. No _wonder_ it was so perfect.

"Jake?" she sucked his name in on a whoosh of breath as she spun around on her heel.

His name on those lips sent a rush of chill bumps over Jacob's skin, consuming it like a sheet of paper doused in gasoline and touched to a flame.

_Shoop_. Gone.

It razed the last line of defense between Bella and the incendiary inferno that had swallowed him whole.

_That scent._

Strawberries and sea-breezes had somehow metastasized into wild amber honeycomb, succulent appetent ginger, lush fertile cream. A million times more potent than leech, it burned through his brain, viscous and scorching and clinging like Napalm. It awoke a demon deep in his being and like a serpent, shiny obsidian and slick, it rose up from the depths of his gut with fang and filament tongue to taste. It slithered - ruthless, relentless - winding around his body, his heart, his soul to squeeze out the last respiration of comfort and affection, suffocating him with want.

Need.

Craving.

_Holy Goddamn, motherfucking, cock-sucking shit._

Jacob's fingers bit into the metal of the engine bed, leaving dents like it was nothing but memory foam.

"Jacob?" she called again. Her voice was duskier now, the pastel tones of womanhood, and it slammed him hard like a sucker punch… or a taser right to the crotch.

He pulled his lower lip into his mouth and felt the gratifying pop of teeth rending flesh. Copper flooded his mouth, injecting just enough sensory substance to allow him to wrestle his fists around viper coiling in his gut. He swallowed greedily, desperately sucking more of that mitigating taste from the gaping hole in his mouth like a vampire feeding on itself.

But he healed too fast.

"Hey! Don't you _dare_ ignore me, Jacob Black!" Realization and it's corresponding shock had evaporated from Bella's anxiety now. She took several shaking steps toward the hulking man who hadn't moved a muscle. But each stride oddly felt like trying to do so under water, or like she was fighting an incendiary backdraft.

She stopped.

She really couldn't do _anything but_, her feet simply grew roots in the ground. That stranger's body slowly straightened, inch by inch, muscles and sinew twitching with tension like a bungee cord pulled far too tight. Those massive shoulders pulled back, lifting smooth sweeping pecs along with them and making the musculature ripple down his chest and abdomen in a coordinated shudder like dominos.

Bella's swallow made a strange squeaking sound in her throat. Vaguely she was aware of Embry towering behind her, and shamefully she was glad.

_This_, was Jacob now. And he was a little bit frightening.

He kept his eyes on the ground as his arms settled back like bows taut and cocked. His slinking step forward was tense and measured, more like mercury congeals across glass.

Bella tipped her head back. All the way back. "Jake," his name caught in the roof of her mouth in a hollow whisper and she saw the muscles clench in his jaw.

_Different_ was a _grotesque_ understatement if there ever was one.

She blinked, once. Twice. Hell, three times.

As if a vacuum inside her had imploded, suddenly scalding heat rushed in to take its place like the coursing rapids being pumped by her frenetic heart were gasoline in her veins.

And Jacob had struck a match.

For it was him, but holy crap, it was also _nothing_ like him: his features were carved in a chiseled and intense caricature of the boy he had been. His jaw-line was pronounced and strong, sweeping up to athletic high cheekbones and his brows darted fiercely across the scowl of a severe brow. His glorious long hair had been shorn to messy ebony spikes, but she could no longer imagine the former length in context with that face: stern, feral, proud. The sheer masculinity of his features would have singed his locks short on principle alone.

She'd always thought - and even told him so on several occasions - that he'd been a sorta beautiful boy, but those words were nothing but an effete and ineffectual husk now. He was a handsome and magnificent specimen of a man that literally dripped with incontrovertible virility and strength - sticky and bitter and sweet like blackstrap molasses.

And it awakened something recondite and yearning that changed the rhythm of her heart. He was still several feet away, but she could _feel_ his heat radiating over cheeks and she felt like a wax mannequin left out in the sun - her insides deliquescing further to pool heavy and hot at the apex of her thighs.

_Holy freaking mother of crap._

Bella sucked in a harsh breath through her teeth, painfully frozen between the driving impulse to take a step forward into that musky heat… or turn with a scream and flee. Never had she felt this… this _wanting_. And it scared her as much as his dark and intimidating new self. Her brain felt swollen and sluggish - she simply couldn't fathom how in 14 short months he could change so radically. Yet, more frightening - more terrifying even - was the knowledge that she obviously had as well.

Her breath was rapid and shallow, echoing in her ears with a grounding rasp, as she flailed against the turbulent maelstrom raging through her body and mind. She had to find _some way_ to get her head above water. This was _Jake_. Her childhood playmate, her oldest confidant, her very best friend.

And he needed her (didn't he?).

She snatched at the lifering of her concern for him and clung to it for dear life.

_C'mon, Bella. Get a freaking grip._

She licked her lips and Jacob flinched like he'd been pinched - just a subtle jerk of one shoulder.

Brow furrowing, her lips parted…and finally she forced words out in nothing but a gossamer breath: "Jake, look at me."

Jacob could do nothing but comply with his own soul's mandate when requested by that quiet voice. It spoke deep in the hollow of his ear and bewitched.

But he fought it… he did. Every last inch of the way.

Tearing his eyes from the pebbles of her toenails he'd been memorizing - she'd painted them pink like little candy chicklets - his gaze dragged up slender shins, cataloging every little scar and shadow. He could easily read the roadmap of her skin, his mind neurotically classifying each blemish with a memory. He'd been there for nearly all of them.

Except the current blushing bruise on her knee. When did she get that? How!

Renewed adrenaline charged into the already potent cocktail flooding his veins as senseless protective rage rose up from deep inside him.

"Jake?"

That voice helped him swallow it back down and he continued his visual survey, slipping up long creamy thighs and tracing the hem of her shorts before hugging the feminine swell of her hips. A two centimeter swath of her stomach taunted him, but was trumped by the need to traverse narrow waist to ripened breasts. Petite, but full enough for his palm.

Jacob's nails popped into the heel of his hand, burning, distracting.

The blue baby doll tee shirt was scooped low enough to show delicate collarbones and her breath - rapid and light - nestled in the hollow of her throat like a frightened animal. His gaze snapped up to her mouth where its echo quivered on her lips.

Fuck… those lips. Like candied champagne apples, a slick and sticky confection. Jacob wanted to lick. Lap and lick and suckle until he'd swallowed every last drop before devouring the moist crisp hollow of her mouth.

Bella felt his gaze rake up her body, viscerally shucking off her clothes like a tight glove and raising chill bumps over her skin like a sudden racing summer shower. It was no more than a second, but somehow time stopped as she watched, fascinated and horrified as his attention unfurled over her like a firm and covetous caress. His gaze got stuck on her mouth like a magnet and her own attention innately mimicked it by snapping to his lips.

His mouth was perhaps the only thing about him that hadn't changed - still full and well formed, it was shockingly sensual for the hard lines of his face. A slight under-bite pushed the lower lip out like an prompt or a promise and made her sway on her feet from the pull.

The dainty teardrop over her lip pulled Jacob's hungry gaze up to her nose where he could count the faint freckles like stardust. Even the sun couldn't resist kissing that skin. Smooth peaches and cream with soft blushing cheekbones, a shading fringe of lash fluttering like a whisper…

His nostrils quivered like a spent racehorse with a soft rasp that tugged and pushed breath from his lungs and made Bella want to hoard it in a jar. Her gaze flitted up to the miniscule twitch in his right jaw, but got caught in the flawless caramel of his skin. She wanted to taste it, sweet and slick collecting the tiny beads of perspiration under charcoal straight lashes…

The air between them was rent in half by their synchronous gasp.

**Those eyes.**

.

.

.

Those eyes, shining like black diamonds sliced clear down to Bella's soul, yanking it out in one fell blink. She could see the pain that had hardened under unendurable pressure into pure adamantine rage.

**Those eyes.**

.

.

.

Those eyes were like peat, a soft and loamy brown. Jacob could curl up and fall asleep in those eyes and never dream another nightmare again. While he watched, her pupils yawned, stretching open and inviting him to drown in the clear, redemptive midnight of her soul. Oh, he'd do so happily.

Closer… if he could just crawl into that darkness, press himself deep and long into that forgiving warmth…

"Jay," Embry's voice was taut, tense, urgent.

Jacob blinked.

And blinked again.

He was looming over Bella, mere inches away - shoulders squared, pecs tense, dick throbbing - and far too close to taking what he wanted.

And she….

She was shrinking away from the sheer force of his igneous energy - trembling - her sloe-eyes round as saucers.

_Afraid_.

Nostrils flaring, he took a step back. His gaze had yet to break free from bewitching steel trap of her pupils, though her lashes were blinking like hummingbird's wings. He drew on what miniscule scrabbling sanity was left him, and his lips hitched up on one side as he cocked his head; a wry and predatory smile.

" 'Sup, Bells," he smirked.

Her slack-jawed fear quickly hardened in righteous indignation and those eyes narrowed pushing her brows together in a scowl. "You never called," she complained with hard, hurt edges to the words.

She was disappointed and angry and sad. And it cut like a razor - minute little fissures sliced over and over in his heart. He wished it was possible for him to bleed out.

But his face betrayed nothing and it bothered her, he could tell. He swallowed quietly and worked his jaw back and forth as his eyes paced between her worry. Taking what he could get.

She drew her little body up as those candied lips pursed. "I thought you'd lost these in an accident or something -…" It shocked the hell out of him when she reached for his hand.

Her attempts at biting sarcasm shattered as he wrenched his wrist from the cool of her fingers that set every nerve crackling with a sparks.

_Oh, bad idea, Bells. Bad idea. _ Just the brush of her satin skin nearly undid him, and he frantically battened down the popped and fraying restraints. He needed to get the fuck out of here.

_Now_.

"Jeezis, Jake…" she whispered, looking up at him with summer sky eyes that were suddenly concerned and cloudless. "You're _burning up_."

He sniffed a dark laugh. She had no idea.

"I didn't call 'cause I don't have anything to say," he bit out, stale and bitter like coffee grinds. "To you anyways."

The hurt that clouded her eyes immediately condensed with tears and the last little piece of Jacob's heart shattered like crystal.

"I gotta go," he rasped as he spun around and stalked down the drive. It was the hardest, most painful thing he'd ever done.

And that was saying a lot.

But like every last tortuous duty of the past 14 months, he did it. But _unlike_ every other duty, he did it because _he_ wanted to.

The _man_.

Like he'd swallowed a handful of broken glass, his wolf went ballistic, tearing his insides to ribbons as it savagely flailed in protest. Each step he took away from her and toward that white Chevy pickup a million miles away, cinched the noose tighter around his neck. His vision was blackened around the edges in his myopic and desperate flight and he nearly ripped the door off as he threw himself into the passenger's side, the vehicle pitching and swaying on its tires.

Embry slid into the driver's seat. "What about Bill-…"

"MOTHERFUCKIN' DRIVE!" he bellowed, as his eyes ripped into Embry's expression of shock.

The engine turned over and Jacob's heated gaze snapped back to where Charlie was glaring daggers from the driveway with a sobbing Bella wrapped in his arms. _He had no fucking idea what a favor he was doing her._

With the screech of tires, the truck tore backward and spun around, throwing a denting scrabble of gravel before peeling out.

And then they were driving.

Careening down the road as wildly as Jacob's thoughts like bats out of hell returning to roost at the Rez.

"Jared's got the Pack till I get back," Jacob ground the words like hamburger meat through clenched teeth.

And then he threw himself from the truck.

His clipped and controlled tumble clawed the clothes and skin from his back, and he was back on his feet.

Running.

Sprinting.

Crashing through branches and underbrush and leaping over logs until his feet simply lost their will along with everything else.

Jacob crashed to his knees. His body was vibrating with each beat of his jackhammer heart, his breath shredding viciously through clenched teeth as he doubled over and slammed both fists into his eyes.

This, even _this_ was twisted into something animalstic. Bella was the _last thing_ he had left. She used to be strawberries and daisies, warm sodas and sun.

But now! His love for her was now scorched by prurient lust - imperious, voracious, insatiable.

He wanted _nothing_ but to wrap her sweet tiny frame in his iron clad grip and greedily ram himself home. Over and over, deep and hard, into the ripe sleek silk of her body - devouring the nectar of tender lips and consuming her twilight groans.

Disgusted, Jacob fell forward on his hands and knees and he vomited.

For several minutes his body was wracked with violent convulsions in a futile attempt to expel his fermented heart and cursed soul. Finally, choking and wheezing, he shakily sat up and braced his hands on his thighs as he tipped his head to the sky in utter desolation.

_How… WHY?_

He'd imprinted. On Bella Swan. On _his_ Bella.

And he didn't understand why he'd ever wasted a millisecond wondering what he'd do. It wasn't even a question. Because he loved her too much. Too fucking much.

For _this_.

To shackle her to this yearning… this need… the monster he'd become.

But oh, how he craved.

'

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'

_Thanks for reading. Review if you like._


	3. War

_Many thanks to __**Tayjayfan**__ for the preread . _

_Thanks for reading and hope you enjoy!_

'

* * *

**Chapter 3 - War**

* * *

'

"MOTHERFUCKIN' DRIVE!"

Jacob's bellow jarred Bella down to the bone and her entire body seized in her father's arms. She sucked in a hiccupping breath as she tried to turn around at the screech of frenetic tires and explosive gravel. Her father held her fast.

Craning her neck around, she watched the white pickup careen into a spin out and the peel off down the street leaving a smoking black smudge on the asphalt in front of her house in its haste to…

_Get away from her._

Bella turned her face back into her father's shoulder and pressed into his soft, worn flannel, trying to push her sobs back down into her hollow chest.

"It's okay, Bells," Charlie was murmuring by her hair, as his hands soothed over her back.

But it _wasn't_ okay. Not even close.

Bella pushed away from her father, clapping her hands over her face, trying in vain to gather up all the unrecognizable and pulverized pieces of herself. She tugged her breaths through her stiff fingers, finding comfort in the suffocating pinch.

What had _happened_ to Jake?

With an abrupt about face that gave her whiplash, her tattered hopelessness gave way to anger - at herself, at Jacob… at the adults who were so stoically watching it all happen - and Bella whipped around, slapping her hands impatiently over her humiliatingly weak tears.

Her face gathered shadows like a sticky summer afternoon as her gaze found Billy.

"What's wrong with him!" she hissed, staring down her father's oldest friend.

Billy's face showed the first signs of any actual emotion at all - she could see _something_ sparking and flickering under that cheap unflappable veneer.

"Bells," Charlie murmured behind her, a subtle reprimand dragging her name out.

"No!" She glanced over her shoulder and then snapped back to a man she considered her second father, taking several stomping steps toward his wheel chair.

"What. Happened. To. Jake." She bit the words out with nothing short of ill-mannered demand.

Concern - not censure - tugged at the older man's brow (the same fierce and heavy brow as his son's she now realized). Something unnamable fell away from his eyes, and their black depths flitted over her infuriated gaze with a thoughtful searching like he was doing a calculus problem in his head.

"What happened!" she challenged again, doing her best to keep up her confident facade as her quivering fists found her hips.

"Bella, he's been goin' through a rough patch and he jus-…"

"What _kind_ of 'patch'!" she tersely interrupted more lame excuses.

Billy's mouth popped closed from where it had frozen mid-word at her outburst. He leaned back in his chair and tilted his head, retreating to that infuriatingly dispassionate persona . "He's gotta tell y'himself, honey," he said quietly. But behind those steady eyes, she caught the subtlest glimmer of something sad and fearful like the green flash in an ocean sunset - so fleeting she wondered if she'd imagined it.

Bella's scowl crouched further into her face. "Just _tell me_," she ground out.

"I can't, Bella," he said simply. "I'm sorry."

That he was actually treating her like an adult instead of a raging lunatic did nothing to temper the choking wave of wrath that rose up inside her. With a strangled shriek of frustration she turned her back on him, shoving her hands through her hair.

It was too much. Just too freaking much: all the worry and loneliness over this year, the stress over her move, seeing Jacob like this, _reacting_ to him like this… watching him turn her back on her and run as fast as he could the other way…

"Bells," her dad's voice was soft and sorry and she felt his palms rest on her upper arms.

Bella uncharitably jerked her shoulders out of his grasp with a little grunt.

She heard her father's heavy sigh but he let her be. Bella was ashamed of herself, but honestly if she threw guilt onto the pyre right now, she just might explode.

"Well, Billy," Charlie's voice sounded tired. "Why don't I give you a ride on home."

"That'd be good, Chief," he replied quietly.

Bowing her head, Bella squeezed her eyes shut and bit her lip, trying to cage her racing breath and hemorrhaging emotions.

"Hey Bella…" Billy's voice whispered over the sound of the crunching gravel of his chair. "Don't give up on him, y'hear?"

Bella whipped around with burning eyes. "Like _you_ did?" she hissed.

"Isabella!" her father gasped, finally stepping in.

Bella clapped a hand over her mouth, realizing just what venom has spilled from her lips. "I'm sorry," she gasped into her palm.

And she turned on her heel and ran for the house. She tripped on the damn flip-flops and slipped out of them in a stumble. Then she was running - barefoot through the grass, up the steps, into the house - desperately trying to flee all the heartache and fear that was rearing up behind her like a crushing tsunami wave.

She stumbled on the stairs and then scrambled up them using her hands and feet, and burst into her room. In a blind rage she hurled the neatly-stacked piles of clothes across the room and threw herself face down onto the bed. Gasping, Bella smothered her face in the bedspread that smelled like home (but no longer was) and she sobbed - a convulsive, full-body, retching vomit of despair - until she simply had nothing left.

'

Two sharp raps on the door made Bella throw both her arms over her face from where she still lay on her back on herbed. She had no idea how long it had taken her wretchedness to run its course, only that her father had had the time to both leave and come back.

"Yeah, dad," she mumbled miserably into crook of her elbow.

"Uh, Bells?" Charlie sounded painfully unsure over the squeak of her door. "Can I come in?"

Bella nodded mutely into her arms_._ She was ashamed: ashamed of her weakness, ashamed of her tears and ashamed of the way she had behaved like some ridiculously hormonal teenaged girl.

After a few moments, the bed dipped down at the foot with her father's weight.

"I'm sorry," Bella whispered.

Her father's heavy hand fell on her shin. "S'lright, Bells. I think it's kinda about damn time someone called it like it is 'round here."

Bella peeked down at where her father was sitting on the edge of the mattress.

He awkwardly patted her leg and then slapped both palms on his thighs. "I'm worried 'bout that boy too…. and hell, he's like a son. Or used t'be. And I'm also real worried 'bout Billy."

She didn't expect that. "Why Billy?" She sniffled and sat up a little more, propping herself on her elbows behind her, her tear-stained and puffy face forgotten for interest.

"Well…" Charlie rubbed his hands briskly on his pants and stood up, his tolerance for intimacy apparently bankrupt. "I took him back to the Rez, but he wanted to go to Harry's instead a' home." His eyes scanned the chaos of the clothes-strewn room before lighting on her desk. Clearing his throat with a blush, he turned around toward the window.

Bella followed his gaze and saw one of her bras proudly displayed where it'd been thrown over the reading lamp. She sniffed laugh and sat up all the way, pulling her legs under her.

"So I took him to Harry's and then drove on by his house anyways," he continued, leaning against the window and looking out pensively over the yard. "Billy's truck was there, so I got out, thinkin' maybe I should just have a little talk with Jake myself," he grumbled, his words hardening with a protective edge.

Bella pressed her lips together as she twisted her hands nervously in her shirt.

"But he wasn't there," he mumbled almost as if to himself and his finger ran over the window sash and then absently flicked some dust from his hand.

Bella licked her lips. "Did something happen?" she asked hesitantly.

Charlie glanced over his shoulder at her and his mustache twitched with pursed lips. "Well, they don't lock up, y'know… so I had me a little peek inside…" he turned back to the sill and fiddled with the latch. "The place was a mess. A real mess. "

Bella blinked, processing.

"I think whatever's going on… well, I kinda wonder whether Jake can take care a' Billy like he used to," he murmured. "That boy always had a lot on his plate, but he did good, y'know? They never had much, but they always kept the place up. But Billy's got some special needs now…" he let the words die on his tongue as he flicked the latch back and forth several more times.

"Do they have food?" Bella breathed, trying to read between the lines in her father's face. She grabbed her pillow and pulled it to her chest.

Charlie sucked in a breath through his teeth as he turned around, his gaze washing over his daughter thoughtfully. "I can't rightly tell. I just looked inside - didn't go in or nothin' - but the kitchen…" his sentence was completed by the grimace on his face.

Bella hugged the pillow tighter. "Do they need help, dad? I can help clean and I can cook…"

"Wait a sec, Bells," Charlie interrupted, taking a step toward her. "You' got school starting next week. This ain't _your_ mess to clean up." His brow furrowed and he shook his head minutely. "I was wondering why he never let me pick him up down there no more," he murmured. "The old fool's too proud."

Bella slouched over her pillow in a futile attempt to fill the space left by her breaking heart.

"I-…I gotta think on it a little," he ventured, his distracted gaze darting over the fairy lights before again finding her face. "But I'm telling you all this because I don't want you goin' down to Jake and Billy's alone right now." His eyes met hers with an unmistakable edict and waited for confirmation that she understood.

Bella drew in a deep breath and nodded.

Charlie curtly echoed the motion and then started making his way to the door, the conversation apparently over as far he was concerned.

"Can we go _together_?" Bella asked hastily.

"Lemme think on it, Bells," Charlie turned back to her. Her expression must have been as desperate as she felt because a sentimental smile softened his mustache. "Hey, maybe you and me can take a trip down this weekend with some of that lasagna a' yours."

"Kay," Bella smiled, the tension in her chest relaxing infinitesimally.

Her father continued toward the door and then stopped, casting his gaze around her room. "It'll take yeh that long to clean up_ this_ mess," he chuckled softly.

.

'

_The next morning_

Bella grunted as she struggled to heft a stained Army duffle of tools nearly half her size into a clanking heap in the old pickup's foot-well. The thing was heavy as crap.

_He'd said Jake and Billy's. Not the Rez in general…or specifically a certain garage._

Charlie had gone to work hours ago and, after lying in her bed and fruitlessly chasing sleep that had eluded her all night, Bella had finally decided to do something with a perfectly good summer's day in Forks. The sun was actually shining, the birds were ecstatic and insects buzzed like a fanfare or a dare.

Bella had planned on just getting out of the house at least by taking her new present on a distracting test drive, but she _hadn't_ planned on finding Jacob's olive green canvas duffle of tools patiently waiting for her in the grass.

Tempting her.

Dusting off her hands, she slammed the door closed and walked resolutely to the driver's side.

Directness and patient persistence had always been the best way to handle one Jacob Black. Over the years, she'd stubbornly sat on his bed until he'd finally broken down and cried for his mom. She'd dogged him when he was sulking about his sister getting hitched. She'd badgered him until he'd spilled about being grounded for getting caught with a Playboy in the garage.

It shouldn't be any different this time, right?

She collapsed her head on the steering wheel as insecurity slammed into her like a freight train. Since when did she feel unsure about anything Jacob Black? Since he'd gone and grown three feet, hard eyes and hundreds of pounds of pure muscle, that's when.

Blowing a breath through her cheeks in an attempt to deflate her swollen heart, she turned the keys in the ignition and the truck roared to life.

She _needed_ to see him again - just one more time … just _see_ if that had been pain and hopelessness burning behind those hard stranger's eyes. If he truly hated her now and didn't want her help, well then, she certainly wouldn't push him….but if he needed her she'd go to war.

Drawing in a long deep breath, she sat up straight and rearranged her hands on the wheel with a cursory glance around. With all the competing thoughts and emotions, she hadn't really had a chance to acquaint herself with this boon of a gift, but it was a match made in heaven - which wasn't surprising since Jacob had undoubtedly picked it out.

She cautiously backed the truck out of the driveway.

All too soon the distraction of a new vehicle evaporated into all-too-familiar scenery, and she found herself driving down the Rez roads with her heart in her throat. La Push wasn't a big town, and she knew it pretty well, but after driving aimlessly around for half an hour looking for Jacob's garage, she relented and stopped in Cody's General Store. (Not only had Cody given her directions along with his toothless smile, he'd given her a tootsie pop just like the old days when she and Jake could barely see over the counter standing on tiptoes.)

And that's how she found herself driving down the back roads to a forgotten corner of town with a lollypop in her mouth and less than half a mile to change her mind.

Up ahead a gaggle of cars lined the road and crowded around an abandoned lumberyard warehouse that had been converted into their garage. She pulled the sucker out of her mouth by the smooth paper stick.

Licking the sticky off her lips, Bella readjusted herself in her seat and set her jaw with determination. This was a business, right? She had every right to be here.

Driving one-handed, the lollypop held like a talisman, she pulled right on up to the front of JP&E's Auto - as announced by a sign creatively spray painted on a an old car hood.

Embry was already walking out the door.

Even though she'd seen him yesterday, it was still just as shocking to see him like this. His new adult and bulky height was dressed in a greasy torn tee shirt and a faded pair of jeans. And he was _barefoot_. Who the heck went barefoot in a garage?

Distracted by the absurd, Bella cut the engine and pulled up the parking brake as he came around to her door with a welcoming smile. It didn't match his eyes though, and she quickly popped the tootsie pop back in her mouth to prevent herself from nervously babbling right off the bat.

Her plan was simple: she'd get as much information as she could - hopefully even see Jacob - but no matter what, she was going to pretend like everything was absolutely no-doubt-about it every-day normal (even this towering twenty-something guy who was really 17).

And that yesterday had just been a bad dream.

"Hey, Embry," she greeted in a blithe mumble around the candy as she pushed open the driver's side and hopped down to the ground. It was a little bit farther than she expected and she stumbled, catching herself on the armrest of the door. (It was a pretty every-day normal start.)

"Bella," he chuckled, steadying her with a burning hand. Mentally she cataloged that for later as she subtly took a step back and took the pop back out, rolling the stick nervously between her fingers.

"So, this is nice," she offered a little too brightly, as she cast what she hoped was a casual glance around. (No Jacob in sight.)

"Yeah," he agreed hesitantly. "It's a step up from Jake's back yard."

Bella absently nodded.

Rubbing one palm on the back of her jeans shorts, she pushed emphatically past his hulking body, pretending to ignore the way he subtly tried to block her.

"Everything okay with the truck?" he asked tensely.

"Mm hmm," she piped, as she cut her eyes over to gauge his reaction as she moseyed oh, so casually around the front of her truck and closer to the building. Her gaze covertly panned a slew of cars in various states of disrepair that blocked the entrance of the looming structure. Jacob's telltale classic rock was blaring from inside.

"Hey Bella."

Bella whipped around and the smile died on her lips. Double-takes seemed to be par for the course these days.

Quil was sitting on an old oil drum with a raised hand and his typical cheeky smile. And he'd obviously been drinking the same kool-aid: he was huge (though lankier than the other two) and looked like he was pushing 25.

But surprisingly that same confounding growth paled in comparison to the unnerving sight of his girlfriend sitting on his knee.

_She_ couldn't be more than fourteen.

And she was definitely his girlfriend: she had one arm draped over his shoulder and one of his hands was hanging casually between her thighs. Of course Bella knew Quil had just turned seventeen last month and had the maturity of a twelve year old anyway, but that didn't make the juxtaposition of the pair any less visually shocking. That slender, budding figure pressed so intimately to a male irrefutably well into his prime looked…well, _wrong_.

Disturbing, even.

Bella's fingers flew up to the lollypop in her mouth and snatched it out. "Hey," she wheezed, her gaze automatically casing the girl's dark round eyes.

The girl's face immediately lit in a shy but unfettered smile as she leaned into Quil's shoulder. "I'm Claire," she announced in a child's voice.

Unnerved, Bella nodded dumbly.

Seeming completely unaware of Bella's gaping discomfort, Quil brushed his cheek absently over Claire's hair. "It's good we got you back a little longer this time, huh?" His voice was always like a joke about to happen, no matter what he said. Even with jailbait unapologetically draped over his knee.

"Yeah," she mumbled, forcing a smile and then popping the lollypop back in her mouth.

"So… uh," Embry thankfully drew her attention back to where he was shuffling on his feet. "What brings you all the way down here?" He stuffed his hands in his pockets uncomfortably.

His unease oddly bolstered her confidence and Bella let a little smirk hitch her lip as she pulled out the tootsie pop with a pop. "Do I _need_ a reason?" she asked sweetly.

Poor Embry's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. The answer was obviously yes, but he was too polite to say so.

"I mean is there _any reason_ my awesome group of buds _wouldn't_ wanna hang with their awesome friend who's finally moved back home?" she pressed mercilessly, letting her lips peel back from what were certainly cherry-stained teeth. She was cruelly counting on Embry's gentle heart: she was down to clutch tactics after all.

"No! I mean, it's not like that…" Embry stammered, his complexion flushing darker.

Behind her the rock music was suddenly swallowed by silence.

"Geeziss, Emb!" the exasperated complaint bounced around over a deep and sonorous chuckle.

Bella whipped around to see yet another freakishly huge and hulking guy stalk from the depths of the garage. _Paul Lahote_… and yet another satisfied user, apparently. He was slinking toward her with a panther's walk and a predatory leer on a face that had gone from (admittedly) handsome to striking. As if that thought had passed over her face (_oh, she hoped to high heaven it hadn't_) he cocked his head with a cocky eyebrow wiggle.

She'd only ever hung with him on the cliffs when she and Jake went diving, but she knew more than she'd ever wanted to about his reputation already. It was the stuff legends were made of. And by the looks of it, that rap sheet had just doubled in size (along with his bulk).

Bella frowned and lifted her chin. He wasn't going to intimidate her, damn it.

"So I gotta joke," he taunted, his mouth hitching up in that cunning wry smile that lifted the opposite brow.

Bella rolled her eyes and plonked her sucker back in her mouth.

Paul's eyes positively glittered. It didn't bode well. "How many wolves does it take to scare away one little lamb?"

From across the yard Quil burst into explosive guffaws. Bella whipped around and sent him a glare for good measure.

She turned back to Paul with narrowed eyes as she ripped her lollypop out of her mouth. "Paul Lahote a _wolf_? Pul-ease!" she snorted with a disdainful toss of her head. "Mangy old junk-yard dog, maybe. Is that your _official_ title at…" she glanced again at the sign. "JP&E Auto?"

Paul's grin shoved his laugh out in a snort. "Whattaya want, Swan?"

She pointed her lollypop at their ghetto little sign. "Your customer service sucks," she noted blandly.

"That was kinda the idea," he smirked, drawing up beside Embry and planting his hands on his hips. " 'Guess someone's too _stoopid_ to take the hint. Some shit never changes, I just hope it don't bite you on the ass this time." He gnashed his teeth with a snap of jaws.

It was a surprisingly vicious gesture. "You don't scare me, Paul," she dismissed flippantly, taking a crunching bite of her pop just to prove it (even though he kind of did).

"Not afraid of the big bad wolf, little girl?" he crooned, arching a brow.

Embry elbowed him harshly in the side and Quil chortled away behind her with Claire's soft girly giggles now joining in. Something was abso-freakingly-lutely hysterical, apparently.

Bella rolled her eyes, still crunching loudly. "Chihuahua, you mean?" she smacked. "Or maybe _toy poodle_…" she disdained, wrinkling her nose.

Paul crossed his arms over his chest as his face darkened into a frown.

She turned back to Embry, her face theatrically brightening. "So, _Embry_…" she said pointedly, crossing to the passenger side of her truck.

"Paul should get one of those poofy haircuts," Quil goaded over his laughter. "With ribbons!" He burst into renewed hysterics.

Bella couldn't help but glance over her shoulder. Quil was nearly falling over and Claire had her palm futilely clapped over own mirth as she clung to his neck. Bella reflexively smiled. She couldn't put her finger on it, but there was something quiet and sad about that girl, it was good to see her laughing. _Especially_ if it was at Paul.

Yanking open the door, Bella reached in and tugged out the dead weight of Jacob's tool bag. She let it unceremoniously crash to the ground with a boom. "For one, I'm bringing back your tools." (She carefully avoided saying _Jake_ because she playing this thing real cool.)

A low grating sound made Bella take a step back in surprise as Paul brusquely stepped in and ripped the bag off the ground like it weighed about as much as a kitten.

"Make yourself useful and shut the hell up," he literally growled, lobbing it across the car yard with a strength that seemed impossible. The tools weighed at least half as much as she did.

Bella squeaked in fear as the blur hurtled in a direct intercept for the laughing couple. But Quil stood with complete unconcern and snatched the whizzing bag from the air with one hand, angling his body to protect the girl still clasped facilely in his other arm. He let her slip down to her feet while he rolled his eyes at Paul.

Bella's brow knit in total confusion at the interplay.

"Claire, how 'bout you and me get lunch, honeybunch?" Quil quipped looking directly at Paul as he brazenly dropped the bag in the dust with a crash.

"Honeybunch," Paul mimicked him with a sissy voice and sneer.

"Bye Bella," Claire grabbed Quil's offered hand and gave Bella a shy smile that was still teetering on the verge of giggles.

"Nice to meet you Claire," Bella gave her an easy grin.

She was a pretty little thing - already a few inches taller than Bella herself with the thin willowy build of adolescent girls and her long ebony hair pulled back in a braid. Her skin was tawny and smooth under the light cotton sundress. She watched the girl clasp Quil's bicep with an effusive little hop as he gazed adoringly down at her and lead her toward a car parked out on the road.

As they withdrew, Bella's eyes snapped down to Claire's bare legs. The dark cigarette-sized circles - old burns - that tracked up the backs of her calves and thighs under her skirt spoke volumes about the scars Bella had already sensed behind those eyes. Their relationship still seemed wrong on too many levels to count, but she did know one thing: Quil might have single-handedly brought teenage boy humor to an entirely different level, but he'd also always been a pretty good guy.

And so he still seemed. There was an attentive gentleness to the way he treated the girl.

A tug on her hand had her turn around to see Paul grinning devilishly while sucking on the half-eaten lollypop in her unheeded hand.

"EW!" she shrieked, immediately releasing it and jumping back. "Paul!"

Paul straightened with indolent grace, the confection now fully engulfed in his mouth. His sly eyes were locked on her horror as he reached up and grasped the white stick and pulled it slowly out of his mouth with a provocative caress of his lips.

"Mmm…. _extra_ sweet," he leered.

"Gah," Bella spat disgust from the back of her throat.

Same as it ever freaking was, she supposed. And it was the most comforting realization of the day.

"Um, was there anything else, Bella?" Embry pressed, taking a step forward with a frowning glance at Paul.

Nostril's flaring, Bella returned her gaze to her friend. "Well I was under the impression that Charlie purchased my truck from this establishment," she pronounced theatrically.

"Yeah, we worked on it," Embry agreed, herding her with a guiding hand toward the car. Paul trailed lazily after.

"Well I don't even know how to pop the hood," she complained. Of course she could have asked Charlie, but hopefully they wouldn't think of that. She wasn't going to give up just yet - even if buying more time seemed her only course of action at the moment.

"Charlie would know," Paul hummed helpfully from behind her, punctuating the pronouncement by a suckling pop.

_Damn him._

"Well since I'm here, can you show me… _Embry?_" she asked pointedly, casting a dark frown over her shoulder.

Paul gave her a lopsided grin - the tootsie pop stuck in his cheek.

"Sure," Embry brought her around the front of the truck. "The latch is outside … under here." He ran his hand under the hood while Bella bent down and at least made a show of watching while her mind spun. _Was Jacob even here - how could she ask without being more obvious than she already was?_

All scheming evaporated into discomfort as the hood groaned open and Embry stared down at her expectantly.

Bella pulled a corner of her lip into the side of her mouth. Now what? She should have planned this better.

"Um…" she took a step toward the maze of metal and helplessly scanned for answers - or questions as it were.

Paul sidled up to the side of the engine and propped an elbow on the car, watching her with a shit-eating grin while he twirled the lollypop in his fingers. He was enjoying himself entirely too much.

She ignored him. "Um…. uh… how do you ch-check the oil?" she spluttered.

"Okay," Embry earnestly stepped up and reached in - _somewhere_ - and started unscrewing a cap.

She knew she was in trouble when Paul leaned down on both elbows with a gratified smirk. He rubbed the lollypop over his tongue and then smacked his lips

"So lemme get this straight, little Swan…" each chuckle was like a death toll. "You're _finally_ asking me how to use a dipstick? I can show you how to work mine…"

All the blood in her body felt like it was shucked up to her face. Bella choked on her tongue.

"What're you _doing_? !" Embry hissed through gritted teeth, pulling Bella protectively to his other side.

"**PAUL**! !"

Bella jumped a foot off the ground at the deep bass that exploded behind her like a sonic boom.

"That," he quipped to Embry, jerking his chin toward the garage. Propping one foot over the other, Paul smirked and plopped the sucker back in his mouth.

'

'

With a snarl, Jacob snapped the crowbar in half tossing the pieces over each respective shoulder as he stalked out of the garage, incendiary fury jerking his stride. Paul's provocative tease was nothing but a potent accelerant poured over an already combustible cocktail and he was officially ready to explode. He should have known better to send Paul out there to do what Embry's kind heart couldn't.

Jacob also knew that he was playing right into the ploy of their infamous troublemaker, but what that little fucker didn't know was that he'd be lucky to survive the fallout from this one.

So far, only Embry knew about the imprint.

Not that he kept things from his Pack. He just couldn't talk about this right now. With anyone - even himself. Last night, he'd ordered the Pack off their patrols and taken them all himself, spending the long lonely hours frenetically running himself into the ground and trying - in point of fact - not to think about anything. Come morning he'd prowled out of the woods and into the mundane: there were still human duties and deadlines that had to be kept.

"PAUL!" he bellowed again, stepping out in the sun. His hands were clenched into his fists and his entire body was quivering like a bow pulled to its taut breaking point.

Jacob's expression must have clued Paul into the gravity of the situation, because that devious knowing grin slipped from his face like it was made of teflon and he straightened with a stiff spine. Dropping his gaze, the man subtly tipped his head, covertly baring his throat in deferential lupine appeasement.

It was just enough for Jacob to reign in his beast.

Jacob's eyes narrowed and his nose wrinkled with his flash of canines. "_Leave_," he hissed, like steel on stone, lacing the single word with a biting compulsion.

Without a word or glance, Paul turned around and jogged off down the road. Sometimes the moron did the right thing.

With that threat literally banished, there was nothing left between him and that indomitable imperative: as if she'd clasped those tiny hands at his jaw and forced his head, Jacob found himself compelled turn his gaze to ….

Bella.

She was leaning back against that truck like an angelic hood ornament to the behemoth truck that somehow looked even more laughably outworn and haggard in contrast. Dressed in ripped jeans shorts offsetting a gauzy blouse that hugged deliciously under her pert breasts, her organic beauty and supple figure was served up to sensual feminine perfection. Mahogany curls caught rainbows from the summer sun and framed a pleasing heart-shaped face and irresistible dark eyes. She was staring.

But hell, he was too.

To add insult to injury, at that moment a soft breeze ran its fingers through her hair ferrying the fragrance directly to his nose. He inhaled it silently - through both mouth and nose - his eye lids growing heavy as his body ignited like his blood was kerosene.

_That scent. _

Raw heated honey and ripened cream with just enough of a guileless and dewy floral accent to make his mouth water and his balls burn: innocent, succulent… aroused. She was indisputably reacting to seeing him dressed in nothing but the cutoffs from yesterday and the sweat of hard labor, and her body's reaction called to him like a siren.

A lurid fantasy flashed through his mind of taking the twenty feet between them in exactly seven steps. He'd scoop her up with one hand, throw down that hood with the other…and then serve up that tiny body on that front of that 1963 Chevy and ravenously devour every last luscious drop.

Fortunately Embry chose that moment to clear his throat.

Jacob fought with everything he had to slam that shit down. Inside he might be burning, but his Alpha control hadn't so much as betrayed a twitch of muscle.

Bella was the first to blink free from her thrall. "So, um… do _y-you_ know how to ch-check the oil?" The nervous little squeak in her voice robbed her courageous attempt at sarcasm.

A single laugh at her gall - it was drab and pitiful - escaped his lips on a puff of air.

"Go home, Bella," he wove the word in the back of his throat, bypassing his resistant lips. And Jacob abruptly spun on his heel and stalked back toward the garage.

He heard her incensed huff and Embry's ineffectual stammer.

"Hey, B-Bella why don't you..?"

"Wait a second, Jake!" she cried, as she jogged after him. "What kinda business are you running here? !"

Jacob's stride didn't even falter though his eyes clenched shut in dread. _Of course_ she was following him. What the hell was he going to do now? (other than murder Paul very, _very_ slowly next time he saw him.)

"I mean you just buy a car from this place and then that's _it_? No customer support? Maybe I should sue." Bella continued with the lame dorky humor that had always gotten them through the worst times as she wove around the cars, tenaciously tailing him.

Jacob fled into the cool dark of the garage - seeking refuge in the comforting scents of gasoline, stale oil and must. The Clearwater's truck was taking up one half of the double bay and he crossed the empty grease-stained floor toward the counter in the back. She'd stopped talking now, but her scent was bleeding into gloom around him like sunlight through stormclouds. Jacob snatched up a tool - he couldn't at the moment say what kind - and restlessly turned it in his hands.

"_Jacob Black_," she hissed emphatically. In his mind's eye he could see those little hands fisting with indignation and finding her hips. He wondered if they were shaking.

His were.

Jacob's breath escaped in a long tired sigh as his head bowed, raising the vertebrae down his back.

"Whatta you want, Bells?" he whispered. There was a hopelessness dripping from those words - he _knew_ what she wanted: a return to the way things were.

Hell, he wanted it too. And much more.

Bella licked her lips and the crisp luscious sound made his eyes roll back in his head.

"Jake… _Jacob_," she breathed, letting sincerity ache in her whisper. "I wanna know how you're doing."

The muscles in his back twitched and for several seconds he struggled to string his thoughts on his light rapid breaths. He was panting.

And she was too.

"I'm fine." His words were curt and rough hewn and he heard her shift uncomfortably.

She took another several steps toward him. "Are you?" Her voice was gentle, searching, worried. All the things he didn't want her to be.

His heritage answered with dominion, anger instantly glazing and hardening his aching heart. He turned around - a lithe fluid movement, more like an undulation than a spin.

"Yes," he bit out of his scowl.

Bella blinked at the suddenness, a shadow of fear flickering over her features before her familiar stubbornness again took root. "You are _so_ not fine, Jacob Black," she countered with a little warning shake of her head.

His wolf reacted to the challenge… hell it reacted to anything and everything about her. The animal wanted to throw her down and dominate, proving himself worthy and erasing her doubts with his hot hard mouth. His eyes narrowed and he took a half step forward. She was _so close_… he could snatch her up in one leap.

"Bella, Jake's fine but we got' a deadline," Embry's low voice finally drew Jacob's attention to the fact that they were _not_ actually alone in the cavernous room. His Pack mate was standing protectively - but wisely - several feet behind her. Embry knew he wouldn't be able to stand it if a male were too close right now.

Jacob's gaze snapped up to Embry's assessing and worried eyes and the boy minutely shook his head in warning.

"That's cool, I get it," Bella snorted sarcastically to Embry - her steady gaze locked on Jacob. "But I think - as a _customer_ - he can give me five freaking minutes."

"C'mon Bella, how 'bout another day…"

"Emb, jeez!" she whipped around, blissfully emancipating Jacob from those huge yawning eyes. "I mean, no offense, but can't we just have a few minutes alone?"

Embry looked down at her with a deer in headlights look that was laughable considering he towered over her by over a foot.

"He's not _paying_ you to babysit, right?" she said a little softer and trying to soothe that expression with gentle humor.

Embry's lips twitched at her audacity and his gaze flitted over her head.

Jacob nodded curtly and whipped back around, pacing to the counter. He'd finally figured out that he had a ratchet in his hand. He riffled through the bin aimlessly, choosing a head and attaching it with a click while Embry extricated himself.

"Well I'll just take another look at that engine," he was mumbling. "The timing belt's a little off."

"I have no clue what that means, but there's another tootsie pop in the glove box," she offered.

Embry barked a laugh. "No thanks. I think I'm traumatized."

"I know, right?" she giggled.

The sound was like crack to Jacob's senses - his muscles twitched and his dick throbbed in accord.

"Stay around," Jacob whispered to the wall - loud enough for Embry but just under the human audible range. "Come if I call."

"I'll just get on that," he smoothly informed both Bella and his Alpha. The boy was getting slick.

Bella apparently waited as he withdrew and then turned back around with a sigh. Jacob kept his head tucked as he restlessly twisted the socket around on the wrench with slow metallic clicks.

"Jacob… honey… _what_ is going on?" she sighed, sounding as tired and worn as he felt. She'd used his own endearment for her - part ploy, part just a natural expression of the depth of her concern. There was a guileless tenderness in her voice; the kind of soulful concern that had to be cultivated over a lifetime.

It broke his heart.

"I'm fine," he rasped the words like they were acid, as his fingers stilled on the tool. The lie seemed blasphemous.

Her breath hitched liked he'd slapped her, and Jacob found he couldn't resist the urge to turn around. He caught the hurt vulnerability on her face before she valiantly submerged it.

She blinked a few times and the drew her shoulders back. "Seriously?" she accused hoarsely. "_That's_ all you got? '_Fine_?'" Bella bit her lip and lifted her chin, visibly scraping together the last vestiges of courage. Her eyes showed the pain of betrayal and rejection.

And Jacob realized in that instant there was still quite bit more of his heart to pulverize.

"You don't call… you don't even _take_ my calls," her hurt slowly transformed into anger and started building steam. "A _year_, Jacob. A whole freaking year! We always stood by each other - I mean you helped _me_ through all my crap but suddenly you can't call me for _yours_?"

Luckily the wolf was now reacting to her accusatory wrath and the innate need to prove himself to his mate shored up his bleeding heart.

He threw the socket wrench into the pile of scrap metal with a crash and she jumped.

Squaring his shoulders, his pecs tensed and jumped. "Bella," he breathed in a voice that was like the thick sultry swelter in the air before a looming summer storm. "I don't _need_ _you_."

It was _his_ job to protect, _his_ role to be strong.

And it apparently it was also the last straw for Bella.

"Who _are_ you? !" She screamed stomping toward him, the hurt in her eyes bursting into the licking flames of frustrated anger. "This is _not who you are_, Jake!"

Jacob's nostrils flared. Never show weakness? How the hell could he do that, when she knew him so well?

"It is now," he crooned, letting a smirk hitch up recalcitrant lips.

"No it's not!" she screamed, fearlessly lunging the remaining steps and thrusting her palms against his chest with all her might.

The soft cool silk of her palms on his skin was the only thing Jacob felt. Without a thought, lightning hands seized delicate wrists, and his wolf's attention snapped down to his prize.

He could feel the race of her pulse under his fingers in his instinctually careful grip. He could feel the gentle tug of each of her heavy breaths, and the balmy warmth of body. He could scent the mesmerizing cocktail of arousal and fear that made him want to bury his face her neck, sheath himself in her comfort and pump pleasure past her lips in gasp after gasp of his name…

"J-Jake?" she quavered.

Jacob desperately fought to the surface of sanity and his gaze snapped into focus in Bella's wide frightened eyes. She'd tipped her head back - all the way back - and she was staring up at him with yawning yearning pupils and trembling pale lips: a physical manifestation of the same conflict raging in him like a wildfire.

"You can't do that," he whispered - deep and sticky and dark.

Bella's breath hovered at her lips, torn between inhale and flight. "D-do what, Jake? _Care_?" she stammered, her lashes fluttering as she tried to cobble together the right words to stay afloat on these roiling high seas. "Call you on your c-crap?" she spat, in valiant opposition to the acrid fear he could scent.

His mate was strong.

The corner of his lips twitched minutely as he shook his head slowly back and forth in a hypnotic contradiction to the heated intensity of his gaze. He could feel the wolf rising up like an indivertible tide, but strangely it was irresistible, soothing. It bewitched, it enchanted, it seduced him into happily slipping under when he would have flailed and fought like a drowning man. This primal craving for his mate effortlessly flayed and skinned away human sensibility, leaving him nothing but raw and ravenous.

_Take_.

"J-Jake…" Bella whimpered.

Jacob's eyes blinked soundly like a silent clap of thunder, pushing that instinct down and opening back up to human sight.

Bella was frightened now, tugging her wrists with a barely tempered panic. "L-let me go, Jake," she gasped.

Her feeble request was the only harbor where that imperious instinct could find solacing surrender. It soothed the animal to make her happy, it calmed the churning to settle against those shores. Without so much as a twitch to his face his fingers released her, incrementally peeling away one by one from her wrists.

Pulling her hands free the rest of the way, Bella stumbled several steps backward while her breath sprinted laps ahead of her pounding heart.

Jacob cocked his head, a feral movement, as he listened to the mesmerizing harmonics of her fear.

She shouldn't be afraid.

_Why was she afraid?_

He took a step toward her.

The expression on her face inflated into icy terror at whatever she saw in his eyes and the pungent acridity of adrenaline stung his nostrils at the same time a shudder shimmied down her tiny frame.

Bella sucked in a knife-like breath, her widened gaze locked on those eyes. A trick of the light … a reflection? Smoldering coals. Cooling magma. Fired glass.

This was _not_ Jacob.

She started slowly backing away.

Jacob patiently prowled right along after her - she was fleeing? He wouldn't let her leave.

First one slinking step than another, his hips lead with purpose and pulled his taut body after.

With a squeak of fear, Bella whipped around and ran.

Her scream was like a lightning bolt - bifurcating the animal from the man. For a moment Jacob froze: literally drawn and quartered between chasing down his prey and ripping off his own head in sheer self-loathing.

But when she tripped on one of the tools and went careening forward, any and all imbalance instantly unified as one. With the reflexes of his kind, he had her in his arms before she could hit the floor, the tire iron clanking across the garage.

Her hands clapped reflexively to his arms and clung there.

The familiar feel of her embrace brought back something deep and instinctual like muscular memory. For the briefest moment, he was submerged in the blissful respite of the past - before mutations and monsters and pain.

"Shh, honey," he soothed, drawing her trembling body to his chest. She seemed so much smaller now. Fragile. Delicate.

He didn't want to let her go.

She went limp in his embrace like an exhausted child and both man and beast purred in approval as he rearranged her in his arms. Her hummingbird heart and quickened breath cantered onward, but she did the most amazing thing: she turned her face into his chest and pressed her cheek over the deep stalwart beat of his heart. It was a precious offering of trust.

And it was utterly intoxicating.

Like he was drugged - because he certainly was - his feet chose their own path across the floor. Inside he was nothing but a charred battlefield littered with casualties on both sides: a bloody massacre between the heart of the man and instinct of the beast that truthfully had started that first day he'd Phased.

He looked down at the woman in his arms and reeled with the sickening vertigo of double-vision where two worlds had violently collided: Bella, a boy's secret love and best friend. Imprint, ripened female and chosen mate.

Both of them were…

_Mine_.

Without knowing what he was doing he had set her on the hood of the Clearwaters' truck so that she was a little closer to his dwarfing height. Jacob's chest was jerking flimsy breaths up from the settled trough of his exhales like an unbalanced load in the washing machine, as his hungry gaze devoured the exquisite plains of her face. The perception of instinct and heart flip-flopped rapidly between one another like an old stop-motion film as he fought desperately to unify beast and man.

Bella's eyes were swimming and dazed. She looked like she was drunk - but hell, he did too - as she slipped her innocent palm to rest over his jackhammer heart.

"You can't touch me, Bella." His words were a human plea shaped from feral vibration, as he urgently pulled her small hands from his skin.

But then he promptly broke his own muttered edict as he brushed her tousled curls back from her cheek. The texture was spun silk and he pushed captivated fingers deep through the soft waves, his nails grazing over the warmth of her scalp. Over and over he combed slowly through her hair, spellbound by the way her eyes rolled under heavy lids.

He _needed_ to call Embry but … he simply _couldn't_. Not right now.

"Why?" she whispered the syllable on an intoxicated sigh.

At that moment he hadn't the faintest idea.

Jacob swallowed audibly, squeezing his eyes closed for a moment as he struggled to remember - it was very important somehow.

"I-I'm different, Bells," he murmured finally, brushing and caressing and watching the way her tongue quivered over her lower lip. "Everything's changed."

"I don't care," she breathed, her dark endless eyes trying to focus, crossing with the effort. "I'm still your friend."

_Friend_.

The word sent a reactive jolt of heat through his body and his fingers combed back and buried in the thick tresses at the back of her head.

She wasn't a friend… she was _his_.

Slowly his fist twisted, tugging the roots with a gentle insistence that made her eyes pop open and her breath snag on her teeth in surprise.

Jacob idly watched the chill bumps race down the side of her neck as his gaze wandered possessively over her face to her eyes.

His.

His grip tightened in her hair, slowly, purposefully, pulling her head back millimeter by millimeter. She instinctively submitted to his will with a delectably lovely sigh.

"Jacob," she breathed- praise or petition he didn't care.

His.

Her breath was hitching and uneven clinging to the inhale as if by centrifugal force. Like a puzzle piece, it was the perfect counterpart to his long and heavy exhales completing full deep breaths between them. She ardently followed his prompting and tipped her head to the side, baring her neck in an innate and covetous plea. A deep rumbling purr rose in his chest, pulling him closer.

_Closer_.

He bent over the exposed tendons in her neck and inhaled the heady scent that rose from her skin. The tang of fear had evaporated long ago, and now her hypnotic sweetness had ripened with undeniable want. It slipped over the back of his tongue with a settled soothing seduction: fertile, feminine.._._

_Mine_.

His body swayed forward, stepping between her parted knees, and he caught his weight on the metal behind her. Supporting her delicate head with that fist twisted in her hair, he leaned her back slightly while he took immaculate sensual inventory of his mate. With a sumptuous patience Jacob surveyed every pore up and down her neck - the tip of his nose brushing across her silky skin - gathering her racing pulse and swallowing it greedily over parted lips.

"Mine." His breath shaped the word in a barely audible whisper, tattooing it across her skin and pressing it under her frenetic heartbeat.

She echoed it in a sheltering sigh.

"Is this what you want, Jake?"

Embry's dusky warning was meant only for Jacob's preternatural ear. His friend had spoken for his incapacitated conscience and it was like a taser and life ring at the same time.

He froze.

And the wolf went ballistic - reacting to the sound of a male's voice in proximity when he was poised and keen to take his mate. With everything his inheritance had gifted, Jacob pulled himself, fist over fist, up the tenuous lifeline from the rushing rapids of sheer insanity.

A growl of seething fury escaped his diaphragm and Bella's body stiffened in his arms. Panting like a racehorse, he pressed his forehead against her jaw, pinching her skin with his clenching eyes.

He felt the sentience and cold crisp consciousness rushing like ice water through her veins. "J-Jake?" she rasped, her voice hitching and rough like she'd just awakened. Because she had.

Jacob's fist in her hair slowly flattened to comforting palm as he pressed his face into her neck. "I'm so sorry," he whispered.

Swallowing thickly, he incrementally pulled her back up straight - it took every ounce of inhuman strength braced against the hood of the truck to do so.

And all the fathomless depths of his love to force the next words:

"Bella," he choked, squeezing his eyes shut as he drew in a steeling breath in the sweet spot just below the lobe of her ear. "We _can't_ be friends anymore."

With that pronouncement, he ripped himself away from her frozen body - his wolf howling and flailing in fury - and spun on his heel, still managing a glimpse of the dazed shock that painted her face. Stalking across the garage with a jerking stride, he braced his hands against the counter, gritting his teeth against the tremors that violently tore through his every muscle.

He wanted to run - to tear through the forest - fleeing this compulsive and imperious need that threatened to crush them both. But as it was, it took every ounce of strength, every shred of restraint, every scrap of control to move even this far away. And stay there.

His pulse was roaring and his breath rasping in his ears but each of Bella's soft hitching breaths was like a sledgehammer to his skull. His wolf tore his insides to ribbons. His hands were burning with the mandate to snap her back up in his arms and never let her go.

"_Embry…"_ he ground out, a grating parody of the word and a desperate plea.

In response - finally - Embry's quiet footfall tentatively whispered across the floor.

"Bella?" he breathed.

Her silence was deafening.

Every muscle resistant, Jacob crouched to the ground, grinding his teeth against the ache in his bones that were straining to twist back around. If he did, he had no illusions what would happen.

"C'mon sweetheart."

Every sound magnified, Jacob could hear his Pack mate's arms brush across skin and cloth as he scooped her up off the truck with the soft rasp of metal.

A male was _touching_ her. His mate. _His_.

The wolf howled through the marrow of his bones.

Jacob pressed his forehead into the sharp edge of the counter and his clawing hands dug into the laminate and splintered the wood underneath in his straining defiance, his every muscle was clenched solid like steel to cage the inferno unleashed inside him.

Only the Chevy's engine turning over with a purr in the yard could release him from the torture. Like a spring he exploded, whipping around in a crouch, his muscles jerking and slithering under his skin with the freedom. Like a cruel mockery, her scent still hung in the air and a snarl of savage desolation finally ripped from his chest.

The garage was empty and the beast was livid - only the Clearwater's truck stared back at him with vacant eyes. With a roar, Jacob lunged across the room, ripping the hood off without a second thought and crumpling it between his fists. Kicking and punching, he flipped the vehicle over on its side with a thunderous boom as he continued the punishment, maniacally crushing into metal and shattering glass while his fists erupted with a bloody spray. That it was a paying job and the only transportation of one of the precious tribal elders only fueled and fanned the flames.

He tore that fucking the thing to shreds.

To hell with human deadlines and obligations. Fuck them all.

Maybe - just maybe - the almighty Counsel would finally understand.

There were already casualties in this war.

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_Thanks for reading. Review if you like._


	4. Transformation

_A/N about darkness: this fic is written to be brutally honest, not dark for dark's sake. I wanted to take an honest look at where Jacob might be if this actually happened and see if I can't transform/heal that with realistic romance. (Hint: I think I can) _

_This chapter attempts a technique that both switches between two POVs and makes a metaphorical point about the characters. It starts off with a scene intended to simulate a certain metal state. We start putting things back together in the next installment._

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_Prereader:__ Tayjayfan_

Thanks for reading and hope you enjoy!

* Quote is truncated and embellished from: _Twilight_, Chapter 6, p.124

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**Chapter 4 - Transformation**

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_Breathe._

_In, out. In, out._

Bella heard breaths soughing across her lips in curt, efficient jerks. Each inhale caught in the back of her throat with a little click.

_In, out. In-in…out._

The sunny sky had been gathered up in the fist of afternoon storm clouds and the air rushing through the truck was sopping and thick. The driver had rolled his window down.

_Why-…?_

_What-...?_

_How-..?_

A whimper of stress stole out on an exhale and Bella's body twitched. She rearranged herself in the seat, her hands curling into loose quivering fists on her thighs.

_Breathe._

_In, out. In, out-out._

The first raindrop hit the windshield, as loud as thunder and Bella jumped, her eyes snapping to the crystal splatter on the glass like it was a bullet. Blinking rapidly, she watched another drop land beside it. Then another.

The driver rolled his window up with a quick jerking motion of his arm.

Embry.

It was Embry driving the truck. He stole another glance at her and swallowed. It was a loud squirting sound that made his Adam's apple lurch. His hand raised and Bella flinched away. He pulled down the lever on the steering wheel and the windshield wipers groaned to life, making her freeze - halfway to the safety of the door.

_Back, forth._

_Back, forth._

Dancing like a squeaky automatic puppet show. Like those horrible creatures at Chuck-e-Cheese in Port Ange. Embry, Jacob and she had gone there for an early celebration of her birthday one summer just before first grade. Bella had cried and fled into her father's chest from that big-headed, musty, matted mouse: another teen hating his summer job. Jacob had thrown his arms around the costumed character and laughed.

Jacob.

_Where_ was Jacob?

_Who_ was that?

_How_ was that Jacob?

_Why_ had she spread her craving legs, tipped her yearning neck back and pressed her wanting breasts into his slick musky chest? And burned?

Oh, she had burned.

"You okay, sweetheart?" Embry's new deep voice undulated through the car and Bella jumped, whipping around and pinning him with wide eyes.

His brow was furrowed: sad, sorry, concerned. His caramel hand left the wheel, reaching out toward her. Offering comfort.

Bella surged back, hitting the door with a hollow thunk, and that hand froze. Trembling in the air between them.

"Sorry," he whispered, and it again gripped the wheel. Those eyes again returned to the road. That jaw clenched, pressing his lips in a thin line. He had no comfort to offer.

Bella turned her back. She turned into the door and pressed her cheek on the cool glass that was gathering moisture from the air. Outside the rain tapped and ran, hundreds of kamikaze drive-bys. The sky was defiantly weeping like a taunt.

Bella wanted to do the same, but she knew that if she leaked hot salty sorrow from her burning eyes, it just might relieve the pressure in her chest so that her heart could pump freely - instead of the squished gurgly compressions that ached with each beat - but she was afraid. If she razed the dam right now, she might never stop crying.

Or maybe she was afraid that if all the sadness leaked out she'd be left nothing but a lump of icy inert panic in her chest. Because where she used to find comfort and friendship and home, she now found fear. Terror, really. She was terrified.

Of Jake.

Those eyes: impossible incandescent anger.

The sound: grating feral fury.

His touch: burning and narcotic.

The way he moved: smooth and quick like an animal.

Her mind desperately scrabbled across the cold hard pebbles of impossible facts, searching for some reasonable explanation. Extreme jet-lag? Drugs in the tootsie pop? Fatigue, stress and an all too vivid imagination?

A psychotic break was the most rational conclusion.

Bella was a grounded girl. An earthy girl. She had her feet firmly planted in plans and action and physical world. She had always been the most reasonable of the two of them. In middle school, on firefly and bonfire summer nights, they'd sat around the licking flames and listened to the old men tell their stories in deep shaking voices that made the children squeal and couples cuddle. One such night Jacob had leaned into her ear:

"_You see, the cold ones are the natural enemies of the wolf—well, not the wolf, really, but the wolves that turn into men, like our ancestors," Jacob had whispered, his eyes sparkling with mischief and firelight as he tightened his arm and the blanket around her shoulders. "My own great-grandfather knew some of them. He was the wolf who made the treaty that kept them off our land." *(dialog is quoted as noted.)_

"_So you're saying you're part puppy 'cause your grandfather was a wolf, Jake?" she teased him, snuggling into his side._

"_Great-grandfather," he corrected with a grin. "And I ain't no puppy… I'm a mean, scary, kick-ass wolf." Jacob howled theatrically._

_Bella snorted. "Those are just some old stories and you're a big fat dork." And she'd promptly grabbed a handful of sand and shoved it down his shirt. _

Bella opened her eyes from memories as the truck slowed down over the crunch of gravel. Her front yard swam behind the rain-soaked window.

The truck shuddered into silence and the creak of the parking brake jerked her body upright.

_Could the stories be true?_

Embry's heavy sigh breathed through the cabin and then the driver's side door opened to the rushing whisper of a full-on downpour. She heard him slip to the ground and the door slam afterwards on lonely silence.

A supernatural hypothesis made all the inconceivable suddenly make sense. Who turned from sunny rambunctious best friend into an angry and sexualized male in his prime in the space of 14 months? Who grew a foot, pounds of muscle, and aged ten years at 17? Who's eyes glowed like coals and body prowled like an undeniable predator stalking its prey?

_Who_ was Jacob Black?

_Wolf_.

The car door opened and Bella's gaze jerked up from her lap. Embry was watching her carefully from the hard lines of his new face. And -with that hypothesis in the back of her mind - in a flash of insight she saw him as he was, not through her eyes' flimsy attempts to make sense of it. He wasn't a boy who'd gone through an abnormal steroid-fueled growth-spurt.

He had changed.

_Completely_.

A metamorphosis had left him with lithe muscular limbs and a cagey tension in his spine, a piqued and alert attentiveness as if he were perpetually lodged in the starting blocks of a sprint. There was a tight sadness and lost innocence around his eyes. It hemmed his mouth and weighed down the corners. His shoulders were unnaturally broad but still subtly bowed under a weight too heavy for his meager years.

He was lost and suffering and doing the best he could.

But Bella was still afraid.

As if he had seen fear in her face - he probably could - Embry took a graceful step back, the muscles in his soaked shirt rippling with incidental power.

Bella's eyes trailed down that massive physique to his muddy bare feet, and she slipped down out of the truck. It was still too high, and she still stumbled, but this time Embry made no move to help. She steadied herself on the armrest of the door and then squared her shoulders and turned toward the house.

The cool cleansing rain washed over her face as she took one step after the other. One breath after the other.

_In, out. _

_Right, left._

She took each step like a regret, slow and tortuous, until she reached the dry shelter of the porch. The storm tapped out a Morse code of her reeling thoughts.

S.O.S.

It was all too much. Just too damn much.

Bella reached for the screen door and tugged - the swollen wood stuck and it wobbled open. With a sharp intake of breath she remembered: she didn't have her keys.

She whipped around.

Embry was standing several feet behind her, her keychain dangling from tentative fingers.

Bella's gaze flitted up to his rueful dark eyes and she swallowed thickly, reaching out a hand that shook. He dropped them in her outstretched palm without so much of a brush of that burning skin. It didn't matter though, the keys were hot from his touch and she could see the water evaporating off his shoulders in a wispy smoke anyway.

She curled her hand around the clinking metal, her gaze falling down to her fist. Her mouth opened with a wet click of her tongue, but she didn't have the strength to push words over her lips.

"I'm sorry, Bella," Embry murmured then, and her gaze snapped up to his face. He was watching her with those sad and searching eyes.

The muscles in her face twitched, pantomiming a thousand silent words and questions. She licked her lips and tried once more.

"Wolf," she whispered hoarsely. It was the gaping impossible rolled into a single word.

His eyes widened infinitesimally before dropping like lead and his nostrils flared with his inhale. "Don't come back, Bella," he breathed.

Without another word or glance, he turned and jogged soundlessly down the old wooden steps and out into the rain. She watched his long easy stride lope across the grass into the woods behind her house.

He'd answered her question with his eyes.

Her hands were shaking like leaves as she tried over and over to fit the key into the lock. Finally she shoved it in and twisted it with numb fingers, opening the door to the stale still air of the house.

The screen clattered shut behind her as she tripped numbly into the entry, leaving the keys dangling in the door. She stumbled into the vague familiarity of the a living room she'd known all her life and collapsed in her father's old lazy boy chair. The afternoon rain tapped at the kitchen window and roared across the metal porch roof with an insistence that demanded she open her eyes and face the storm that was tumbling over her.

In the distance, thunder rumbled.

Jacob looked up at the sound, past the silhouette of the window panes to the darkening afternoon. It was the perfect soundtrack for the storm that he was trying to cage in his quivering muscles.

He'd fled to the last place that reminded him he used to be human. But sitting in his father's worn easy chair, in their tired little house and listening to the rain taunt the corrugated roof with merciless fingers just reminded him of how little human was left.

He felt like a stranger in his own childhood house. He shifted in the chair that used to be big enough for him to sprawl across his father's knee and watch football games while his old man stroked his weathered hands through his hair. Now that chair could barely contain him alone. His large hands dwarfed the shabby arm rests, threadbare down to the stuffing, while his middle finger traced a restless circle that somehow kept him grounded in his jerking body.

He was nothing but a beast hunched in the charred out ruins of a past that was irreparably lost, while his entire being continued to burn.

And oh, did he burn.

She'd submitted so easily to his hands. So powerful was this curse, that she'd bloomed under his touch, her entire body opening and soft. Yearning. The honeyed scent of her arousal had risen with her delicate sighs as she'd turned her neck to him in the instinctual lupine surrender to mate, unknowingly hypnotized by the magic that had ensnared them both.

He could have taken her right there.

On the hood of the Clearwater's now-deceased truck he could have torn the impediments of clothing off those parted thighs, freed himself and plunged into her welcoming warmth. He could have clasped her tiny body in his steely embrace and thrust into her yearning cries, pushing his scent and his seed into her womb. His soul and his child would take root in her flesh and no male would dare look at or touch her again.

_Mine_.

Jacob's eyes popped open to the ceiling with a gasp. His body was tense, arching in the chair in the throes of need. He'd be lying if he said she hadn't been his favorite fantasy for years, yet they'd been the comparatively chaste daydreams of a boy. But after just a whiff of her scent and a glance in her eyes, this curse - this imprint - had irreparably transformed them into a man's dark and voracious obsession.

Bella was a girl who was meant to be cherished and charmed, courted and loved… not lusted after by some animal. His love for her had been the last thing in his life that had been pure and comforting and true. And even that had been taken from him now.

His wolf _wanted_ her - _all_ of her, _only_ for him. The beast was no longer content to crouch alone and isolated in the cage of duty. For the first time it reared its ugly head and imperiously _demanded_ - not for the safety of his tribe or good of his Pack, but for its own selfish needs and desires.

_Mine_.

Jacob understood a little more about Sam now: how his restraint had buckled under denial. And how, in his weakness, when he'd torn his imprint to ribbons, his mind had been stretched to the breaking point of sanity.

In little more than 24 hours, Jacob was already there.

Clawing his hands down his face, Jacob doubled over with a strangled groan.

A soft gasp slipped over Bella's lips.

Her body was still tingling and raw. Far more frightening than supernatural speculation, was this yawning hunger that had awakened deep in her belly. She leaned back against the chair that smelled like her father's Old Spice and closed her eyes as she tried to swallow it down.

Bella was not the most sexualized of girls. Over the last years she'd seen her heartbeat flutter for heartthrobs, she'd given away her first kiss at a 10th grade dance and she'd be lying if she said she'd never dreamed of Jacob's full russet lips, much to her own chagrin.

But, she'd never felt _anything_ like this.

His touch - the surprisingly gentle brush of his calloused heated fingers had awoken something inside her like a sixth sense, and, just as impossible as it was to put on a blindfold and forget how to see, Bella had been irrevocably transformed.

She brought trembling hands up to her cheek, tracing her fingertips over the fiery trail that he had tattooed into her skin. Tipping her head to the side, she ghosted her palms over her hair and then thrust her fingers into the thick damp curls at the nape of her neck. Like a kitten picked up by the scruff of its neck, her body had submitted to his fist and curved up, searching for what would finally make her whole.

Jacob.

It was nothing like the Jacob she'd known, but yet it was also everything he'd always been. His breath and his lips, the tender touch of his hands and steely give of his body. His scent, musky and sweet like a rainy afternoon. It slowed her breath and quickened her heart and liquefied her body with an anticipant longing. It hollowed out her chest with a velvet knife and swelled between her legs with a sultry ripened ache.

It was a want, a need…a craving.

With a strangled moan, Bella's hand slipped back around to cover her face. Her affection and that latent little crush on her best friend had been immutably transformed. _This_ was far more terrifying than whatever impossible wolvish nightmares had pounced from the pages of fairytales and swallowed him whole.

Fisting both hands in her hair she fell forward over her thighs.

Lightning flashed outside and low velvet rumble of thunder was echoed by the heavy crunch of gravel. Bella looked up and glanced at the led clock on the dvd player - her father was home.

"Jake?"

At his father's hesitant voice, Jacob harshly rubbed his face and let his features settle into a stoic mask. He'd heard the Atera's van pull up outside and felt as much as heard his Packmate helping his father into his chair under the rolling thunder.

He looked up at the two men in the doorway, his dispassionate gaze sweeping over his father's worry to land in Quil's grave eyes. The severity looked wrong on his face.

Quil now knew about the imprint, of course. Jacob hadn't expected any different: after his staggering display of explosive weakness this afternoon, his entire Pack would know. And they'd be left reeling and disconcerted. Jacob was their only solid tether in the maelstrom they'd all been thrown into and the only one who kept them afloat.

Jacob unfolded from the chair and squared his shoulders, letting the mantle of duty settle over them to mask the way they wanted to cave. "We'll meet at Sammy's this evening. Tell the others," he intoned, grounding his words in a deepened bass.

Quil's gaze slipped to the floor deferentially, and without another word he turned around and disappeared into the dusk and pouring rain.

Billy's astute eyes stared at him from under his furrowed brow as another clap of thunder crashed outside. Setting his jaw, Jacob crossed the small dark room and pulled the door closed behind him while his father silently watched.

"Quil told me about Harry's truck," he related quietly in a way that could have been a statement about the weather. And, in a way, was.

Jacob said nothing but turned and stalked across the room and down the hall to the bathroom. He pulled the musty towel off the rack and strode back into the main room, tossing it into his father's lap as he made his way into their wreck of a kitchen. Billy had spent last night and today at the Clearwater's - he'd sent Quil to check on him - and that meant he hadn't taken his medicine. He'd probably been "officially" talking about him - he'd been there for the imprint after all. He picked out the two plastic amber prescriptions from the wreckage of dirty cups, empty cans and unopened mail and shook the dosages into his palm.

"You imprinted, didn't you son?"

And there it was. Jacob squeezed his eyes shut as he filled a glass with tap water.

"Aren't you glad it's Bella?"

His father and the Counsel never had really understood. To them this was a game. It was a little bit of dawn in their twilight years that made them feel like maybe their ceremonial positions meant something more than playing wizened old granpa and telling stories around a bonfire to a generation who'd turned their backs on traditions decades ago. Even in his father's generation the old ways had quickly taken a backseat to ten cent movies and soda pop, now the distractions were even more seductive: iPhones and Facebook and reality TV. The old ways just weren't part of the everyday anymore.

Until suddenly - with the crack of bone and shattering of life as you knew it - they were.

Jacob turned around with his father's medication and a bitter smile. "Am I glad it's Bella?" he chuckled darkly - it was bereft and humorless sound. "Yeah, it's just what I always fucking wanted: to drag my best friend and the girl I love into my fucking shithole mess. I'm ecstatic."

Shock at both the bitterness and crassness of his words flashed across the lines of his father's face before being quickly subverted by worry.

Jacob held his father's gaze as he crossed the room and handed him the glass. "It doesn't even fucking matter. I'm fighting it," he spat, letting the pills drop into his father's wrinkled palm.

Billy's eyes darted between Jacob's obdurate gaze for several silent moments. "An Imprint is a gift, son. The Spirit has blessed this generation more than any other in our history. Our legends they say it's a rare -"

"Fuck the legends," Jacob barked a hateful laugh as he pushed a rough hand through his hair and spun on his heel. "They left a whole helluva lot out. They didn't say shit about losing _everything_, did they? Your friends, your family, your _mind_! The whole Rez thinks we're nothing but a gang of crack-head dropouts." Jacob paced across the room with agitation while the rain continued to play a restless counter-rhythm to his racing heart.

"The Counsel knows the price you're paying for us all-..."

"The Counsel doesn't know _shit_!" He spun back around with a glare that included his father in that statement. "This isn't about some kinda bullshit _honor_. This is about our ruined _lives_! Emily lost her face and Sam lost his mind now they're gonna have a kid before they're even old enough to buy beer," he took a step toward his father that was quivering with both heartbreak and rage. "Quil would be rotting in _jail_ for his imprint if he wasn't the Chief's grandson. Embry's mom's pulling double shifts because she can't stand to be home anymore she's so worried. Jared lost his scholarship _and_ his rep. Kim's moving in because, oh yeah… her parents are disowning her. And Paul… hell, Paul's the only one who maybe broke even, only because his life was already a living hell." He finished only a foot away from his father who had sat back in his chair, his glass and pills forgotten in his hands as he stoically took his son's lashings.

Jacob's hands curled into quivering fists. "Every fucking day, every fucking one of us wakes up feeling like we just got shot with a fucking horse-load of meth. We're not hunting deer any more, we've got fucking jobs! Try working on an carburetor when your hands are tweaking because you wanna kill something so bad it hurts," his lips flashed up from his canines. "We're made to kill."

Billy's nostrils flared minutely as he fearlessly held his son's gaze. "You're made to _protect, _Jacob. And you've done a real good job," Billy bit out crisply, as he leaned forward. "Even as a young Pack, you've caught every Cold One who's dared cross our lands. You should be proud."

"Yeah. Proud," Jacob huffed acerbically with a roll of his eyes. "_Three_ in _422 days_. What about the other 419? We're running fucking pointless patrols or holed up in some shack of a garage on the edge of nowhere… trying to keep from going nuts like Sammy." His ire deflated from the words in a flash of desolation, leaving nothing but a limp, puckered shell. With a huffing breath he slapped his palms on his face as he again turned away from his father.

Giving had always come easy to him. As a boy, he was generous with his time and attention and smiles and he'd always gotten a tenfold return on his investment.

If only leading were so simple. It was something that had to be done with not only heart but with acumen and might. He had to do what people _needed_ - not necessarily wanted - and there was no one to show him how or fill him back up when he'd run dry. His father and the others didn't understand.

"And now with this… _this gift_," he twisted the word with animosity into his palms. "I'm on a fast track to the same hell. _How_ am I s'posed to lead like this?"

A thunder clap cracked the air in two, sounding like it was just overhead. His father's heavy sigh followed on its heels.

"Do you know I can still smell her?" Jacob mumbled into his hands as he squeezed his eyes shut against his wolf's clawing swipe at the admission. "Charlie held her and Charlie helped you into the car…_yesterday_," he rasped hoarsely, letting his hands flop down to his sides with a slap to his thighs in defeat. "And I can _still_ smell her on you," he whispered forlornly to the floor. "It's driving me nuts."

He was just so _damn tired_. Inside his enervated body, his wolf was going ballistic - it's acidic ire had already eaten away at the tough shell this last year had formed around his heart and now it was flailing into the raw and tender quick.

It wanted Bella.

The man did too. She'd always been there for him, she'd always made things better. Seeing her had reminded him of that - like the first glimpse of shore after years of endless ocean.

But this time she couldn't. _He_ couldn't...

"It could be a good thing, son." Billy's velvet croon slipped across his skin, soaking in with seductive fingers. His father's words gave uncanny voice to the insidious secret longing that sat, mute and muzzled, in the back of his mind.

Jacob's hands again flew to his face and he rubbed briskly.

"I know it's been hard, son. You an' Bella always had something real special," he continued in a soft hypnotic murmur. "She might be what's been missin'. It could be a _good_ thing."

His entire being rose in a tsunami of assent and met his mind's desperate denial head on. The impact erupted in an explosive rage.

"For who? !" he yelled whipping around with flashing eyes. He took an automatic step back as a tremor shimmied down his body and his skin itched to split from the pressure building inside him. "For Bella? !" he roared. "Do you think she wants to be shackled to _this_!" He thrust his fist into his chest with a hollow boom that was echoed outside by thunder. "I'm a fucking _animal_!"

His father had jerked his chair himself back a foot in surprise, the water sloshing over onto his thigh and the chair crooked from his one handed push. "Jacob," he warned. "Calm down, son."

"Calm down? !" he bellowed. "Do you know…? ! Do you _know_ how close I came to -… h-how I almost-…" he swallowed his horror in a painful gulp. He couldn't say it: lost it…took her like some rutting animal _right then and there_? Disgust filled his mouth with acid and both hands came up to fist in his short hair as he doubled over against his wildly bucking muscles.

"Now wait a Goddamn minute, Jake," his stern tone surprised Jacob just enough.

He froze, his teeth chattering softly.

"The imprint's a powerful thing-.."

"No!" Jacob snarled, shooting back up straight and baring his teeth.

"BUT!" his father yelled the word in a harsh baritone Jacob had never before heard. "_You're_ stronger! You're _not_ Sammy. You're wolf is the _Alpha_! It's in your blood!"

Jacob's wolf stopped trying to snap its tether and perked up at both the old man's tone and acknowledgement.

"And you're my son," his voice softened slightly as control slowly solidified Jacob's heated gaze. "I _know_ that heart a' yours an' that's one damn thing that don't change no matter how much crap gets shoveled your way." He licked his weathered lips and looked deep into his son's eyes. "And what you're thinkin'… what's got you so scared, boy. Well, that just ain't who you are."

Jacob's breath was rasping harshly through his teeth and his muscles were again jumping and jerking under his skin.

"I don't know who the fuck I am anymore," he hissed.

With that he stalked past his father, throwing the door open so it knocked forcefully against the house.

Without a backward glance he leaped the railing and jogged out into the pouring rain.

"Do what you gotta, Jake," his father's voice called out behind him - knowing it would reach his preternatural ear. "I'll call Suzie if I need anything."

Clenching his eyes shut in remorse, Jacob sprinted out into the trees, the rain washing over his skin and siphoning some of the heat away in soothing rivulets. He was ashamed at how he'd neglected his duties with his father this year. But he simply didn't have the bandwidth for any more guilt or failure right now.

His mind had only room for one single obsessive thing at the moment. Or, more accurately, one person…

"Bella?" her father's voice was peppered with worry by the time he'd reached the porch.

Sucking in a breath, Bella whipped her head up as she shot to her feet.

Charlie stopped in the doorway, his eyes taking brief assessing stock before his face relaxed. "You okay, baby?" he asked softer, tossing his soaked umbrella carelessly to the floor and taking several steps into the house. He pulled the keys from the door with a jingle.

Only then did Bella realize she'd left the door wide open and her father had put two and two together. Forks might be a small town, but the man was still good at his job.

Bella nodded hastily, smoothing fingers under both eyes as she sniffled and tried to pull herself together.

Charlie closed the door softly behind him. "You went down there, didn't you?" he murmured, turning around slowly.

"Not to Billy's," she corrected defensively.

Charlie sniffed a laugh, his mustache hitching up on the side with his smirk. "I saw that tool bag out there this mornin' but I was already late. It ain't there now and there's clay on your tires. Rez clay."

Bella's eyes flicked up to the ceiling. _Damn cops._

But in some ways she was glad; she could lie if she had to, but it made her sick to her stomach. "I went down to their garage," she admitted in a whisper.

Charlie's brows lifted encouragingly.

All of the tension and confusion that she'd only marginally been able to push down, rose in a suffocating wave. Bella bit her lip as the pressure threatened to break free in a disastrous display.

The light scolding twinkle in his eyes was snuffed out by concern. "Aww, c'mere kid," he murmured, holding out his arms.

Bella didn't have to be asked twice. She threw herself across the room and into his chest, wrapping her arms around his waist. "He-he's different," she bewailed into the stiff polyester of his uniform. "He's _so d-different _dad."

Her father's hands smoothed protectively over her head. "He didn't do nothin', did he?" he asked low.

Bella sniffled and shook her head against his shirt. It was one lie she'd take with her to the grave. She wasn't even ready to admit to _herself_ how good Jake's arms had felt around her and how in that moment - that that heated, heady, intoxicating moment - she'd come so dangerously close to losing herself. Her body reacted to the mere passing thought and a warm ache rose up from her bones.

She quickly switched tracks, focusing on more practical things. "How, dad?" she asked plaintively, pulling back and searching his eyes for any kind of logical explanation. "_How_ could he change so much? How's it even possible?"

Charlie looked down at her as he drew in a deep breath through his nose, his eyes darkening with his own unanswered questions. "I dunno, Bells," he mumbled, as his hand came up to smooth over her hair. "I mean I really got no idea," repeated with a little shake of his head as his face grew thoughtful.

Bella let her hands slip from around his waist and he took a shuffling step back. Charlie wasn't comfortable with physical contact for long.

"People always see what they wanna see, y'know? So 'seems like everyone just shrugs it off," he mused as he absently yanked down his uniform. "But I'm s'posed to see it like it is." His fingers came up to idly straighten his badge.

Bella blinked and took a step back to lean against the couch, waiting for more.

"Best I can come up with is drugs," he reached up and scratched the back of his neck. "But anabolic steroids don't work _that_ good. And they don't make you taller - opposite in fact in young boys. It stunts 'em."

Bella's hands twisted in the hem of her tee shirt, paying rapt attention. Her father had had more time obviously to think about this. She kept hoping that some logical explanation could explain what only her crazy theory (which had been all but confirmed by Embry) had done so far.

"There are some growth hormones that work a little if you're young enough, but that's only about two inches tops," he continued rolling his shoulders and resting his hands on his hips. "I mean when I asked Harry about it, he just said it was a tribal thing," Charlie snorted. "I told 'em smoking peyote shore as hell don't do _that_."

Bella rolled her eyes. "Quileute don't use peyote."

"I know, but it pissed him off good," Charlie smirked. "Him, Billy and me 'been thick as thieves since second grade, and suddenly he's pullin' this 'paleface' crap?" Her father's face darkened in a frown as his hands moved to loosen his gun from the holster.

Bella nibbled on her lip as her gaze fell to the ground. Her father was obviously dealing with loss of his own - his best friends had pulled back and it hurt him.

"I dunno, Bells," he sighed, making her look up at where he was pulling off his utility belt and setting it on the side table. "It all don't make sense. I probably shoulda tried a little harder to get you to go with your mom." He looked up and met her gaze with uncertainty. "Guess I'm jus' selfish like that."

Bella smiled in spite of herself. "Dad I'm glad to be home," she reassured him. "I shoulda come back a long time ago." Regret slipped into her voice without her permission; she couldn't help but wonder if things would have been different with Jacob if she'd been here whenever all this crazy stuff went down.

"I don't think it woulda done any good, Bells," he murmured astutely. "I'm sorry you're getting dragged into this mess. I' been keeping my distance - I don't wanna get too close and have to get the law involved, y'know?"

Bella pursed her lips thoughtfully, bracing her hands on the couch behind her. It was switching tacks, but there was one question that she thought he might actually be able to answer. "Do you know anything about a girl - maybe 14 - Claire?" she asked obtusely.

"Claire Young?" her father's brow arched, surprised at the change of subject. "Was she down there too?"

Bella nodded hesitantly.

"Yeah, I heard 'bout that." He shook his head and sat down on the stairs to pull off his shoes. "Poor thing - it got real ugly. I arrested her mama - she's got fifteen for trafficking and it's a damn good thing. Heavy into ice. Beat that lil' girl whenever she was coming down and sometimes jus' for the hell of it too."

Bella squeezed her eyes closed with a shudder.

"But yeah, the State gave Old Quil custody," he continued, standing again and stretching his back. "And that's exactly the kinda thing I'm talking about. I don't wanna know nothing more than that," he said emphatically with a meaningful look.

Squinting her eyes apologetically, Bella nodded. "She looks like she's doing better," she tentatively offered.

"Yep. S'what I hear," Charlie agreed.

Bella drew in a breath and let it out in a long puff through her cheeks. This was just a glimpse into the delicate balancing act her father dealt with every day - things were obviously very complicated. It made her head spin.

"Maybe we should just stay out of it, Bells."

Bella looked back up to see her father considering her pensively.

"I mean, you got a new school comin' up on Monday and you don't need to get all tied up in something crazy," he mused, crossing his arms over his chest. "Maybe it'd be better if we just let Billy an' Jake do whatever they gotta do right now."

"No!" Bella pushed off the couch, her heart leaping up to her throat in a magnificent overreaction. "Dad, they need us!"

Charlie's eyebrows shot clear up to his hairline. "Bells, we don't know what's goin' on down there…"

Bella took two anxious steps forward. "We know their house is a mess, right? We know they're not eating well," she pressed. "They're our _friends_." She stopped herself at her father's sympathetic grimace. "Or used to be," she amended quietly.

"Look, I know things are different," she continued with an air of desperation. "And I agree. I don't think I should be spending any time alone with Jake right now either," the words hurt, but they were true (on too many levels to count). He scared her right now - and worse, her reaction terrified her even more. "But I _really_ wanna go down there and maybe help clean things up. Bring some food. _Please_?" she practically begged. She needed time to figure out what the hell was going on, so she could figure out what to do about it - even if it meant walking away. But she wouldn't give up on Jacob yet.

Her father's mustache buckled over the press of his lips and he hummed with a cock of his head, hedging.

"Please," she pressed, widening her eyes in that little-girl plea that she knew got him every time. Desperate measures were certainly appropriate.

Charlie drew in a long deep breath. "Alright," he expelled the word on a sigh of resignation.

Bella grinned, fisting her hands at her side to keep them from pumping triumphantly.

"How 'bout I take you out to dinner and we can swing by the grocery on the way home?" Charlie offered with a smile that told her he knew exactly how much he'd been played. And, in this instance, didn't mind.

Bella nodded enthusiastically. "Thanks dad," she gushed.

Charlie smacked his lips blandly. "Alright, lemme get changed," he mumbled and turned up the stairs without another word.

Bella watched him go as another spectacular clap of thunder shook the house. Worrying her lip, she wandered over to her father's abandoned umbrella and closed it up, propping it up against the wall.

Her mind was spinning as she idly opened the front door and peered out at the rain, falling in sheets. Lightning flashed across the cruiser and her truck parked forlornly in the yard.

"Oh, Jacob," she breathed into the sodden stormy dusk. "What happened to you?"

In the distance, a long eerie howl rose in uncanny response, threading the rumbling thunder with a haunting filament of sorrow.

Bella shivered and quietly closed the door.

'

* * *

'

_Review if you like._


	5. Hurting

_ I read and deeply appreciate every last of your comments (and try my best to hit you back)._

___Just a head's up that this chapter has parts that are a little more subtle. __ Prereader: Tayjayfan *mwah*_

_'_

_Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy._

'

* * *

**Chapter 5 - Hurting**

* * *

'

In the morning light things always looked different. Even if it was the dawn of another overcast Forks summer's day.

Bella rubbed her face blearily and grimaced at the cell phone she'd fumbled from the nightstand at its strident alarm. She hadn't slept well. Dreams of howls and fur and animal eyes had haunted her as she'd sprinted through a dark forest, fleeing the deep panting breaths that dogged her heels.

Or 'wolfed,' more appropriately.

Bella had dreamed of wolves, and in the morning light they felt like nothing but the fantasy of a girl desperate to explain away why her best friend had turned his back. Sniffling juicily through her sleep-stuffy nose, she turned to replace her phone on the nightstand and was met with Jacob's sunny smile in the photograph beside her bed. The old smile, the old Jacob.

Pulling the frame off the little table, she fell back to her pillow, as her eyes ran over the image of "Jake n' Bells" laughing their freaking heads off. It seemed cruel.

With one thumb she traced the side of Jacob's face while her mind furiously searched for similarities between this beautiful joyful boy and the man he was now. His eyes had_ always _been deep-set and intense, come to think of it. But they'd also always been kind and warm, not hard and fierce like they'd been yesterday. Under the smooth roundness of youth, she could see that his jaw _was_ rugged and his facial structure almost regal. Now that she'd seen Jacob in his impossibly potent prime, she could see the roots of that virile masculinity clearly in his features.

And she'd been crazy to ever call him "sorta" anything.

Her gaze seemed to naturally settle on those bowed lips stretched back from his signature sunny smile. His mouth had always been generous and sensual, set into a slight under-bite that highlighted his sturdy chin. She'd thought a few times - well more than that, if she was being honest - about how it might feel to press her mouth to those russet lips. How would it feel now?

Even at this ungodly hour, her body grew warm and heavy at the mere thought. Smoldering embers in her stomach glowed to orange light with each inhale of a breath that had instantly gone shallow and slow.

Squeezing her eyes closed, she blindly set the picture back on the nightstand and threw herself back down on the bed as she took deep steeling breaths.

So that part had _definitely_ changed.

What about the rest?

In the new day and comparative calm of the morning, her outrageous shock-induced theories of monsters and magic simply seemed absurd. There _had_ to be a better explanation than bonfire fairytales of childhood summer nights. Immediately her mind started volleying questions and answers, struggling to make sense of yesterday's trainwreck. Even though her father had come up empty in explaining the shocking physical changes in both Jacob and the others, there had to be a perfectly reasonable explanation. Her imagination peevishly quibbled with her mind:

_How about those glowing feral eyes?_

Imagination and a trick of the light.

_Embry's reaction to her assertion?_

She'd misinterpreted it, plain and simple. He'd probably been embarrassed, not wanting to upset "the poor crazy girl" - she'd been certifiable yesterday.

_How about Paul Lahote's asinine jokes about wolves? _

Coincidence - plus, c'mon, it was _Paul_.

But while Bella found she could rationalize away all proof of the impossible into at least ambiguity, she couldn't ignore the the fact he was suffering.

He'd always been as easy to read as a large-print roadmap: he wore his thoughts in his eyes and his heart on his sleeve. But yesterday, he'd stood as imposing and impenetrable as an obelisk, with none of the usual telltale expressive quirks or body language to go on. Yet under the hard glinting hematite of his gaze, Bella was almost certain she'd caught the faintest glimmer of pain… and hopelessness.

She might try to justify away all the parts of this big mess that didn't make sense, but if there were the slightest chance that Jacob was hurting - that he needed her - then she was going pick up arms and go to war. Even if it _was_ against monsters and magic. (And even if her current arsenal only included weapons of the less glamorous variety - like lasagna and rubber gloves.)

With that thought rallying her determination, Bella sat up and swung her feet over the side of her bed.

In twenty brisk minutes she was dressed in some ratty jeans shorts and one of Jacob's old tee shirts - that she'd had to tie off at the waist - and was padding down the stairs in bare feet.

Her father was sitting at the kitchen table and he looked up from his Seattle times. "You're up early for a Saturday," he noted wryly.

"I have to start cooking," she pertly informed him, as she made a beeline for the coffee pot.

Her father's paper crinkled behind her. " 'You still up for that?" he mumbled skeptically - apparently she wasn't the only one having second thoughts this morning. " 'Cause I been thinkin' and-"

"Yes." She turned around and fixed her father with a resolute stare, daring him to change his mind.

Charlie rolled his eyes. He knew how stubborn she was - she'd gotten it from him after all. "Alright, lemme see if I can get Billy on the phone first," he capitulated with sigh as he pushed his chair away from the table. He crossed to the old yellow wall phone while Bella poured a mug of coffee and tried to ignore the butterflies in her stomach which apparently didn't need the caffeine.

While it rang, Charlie leaned one shoulder against the wall, shrugging the receiver between his shoulder and ear.

"Mornin' Billy," he greeted.

Bella looked up from the refrigerator as she pulled out a pint of cream.

"Hey, 'you got any plans going on today?" he asked, pushing off the wall and bringing his hand to the receiver. He was nervous - and it made her realize just how deeply this was affecting him under that reticent veneer.

Bella crossed to the counter, popping the top of the milk and tipping it into a pour while she watched him.

"Yeah, well if you're gonna be around, I was thinking on stopping by, if that's alright," her father mumbled. "There's that Mariner's game on this morning…"

She could hear the baritone on the other end of the line murmuring something that certainly didn't sound like a resounding "yes." Bella crossed back to the fridge and replaced the cream, closing the door quietly and leaning back against it.

"No, I know I got a bigger screen, but truth is I wanted to talk to yeh a little and-…"

"Yeah, but-…"

"Look, Billy. We jus' wanted to bring over some of Bells' lasagna and -…"

Charlie's gaze snapped up from the floor and met Bella's worried eyes with a raise of his brow. "Yeah, she was gonna come too," he said slowly. " 'Fact it was her idea."

As the voice murmured away on the other end of the phone, the corner of Charlie's mouth quirked up and he gave her a wink.

"What?" Bella mouthed, pushing off the fridge.

Her father's grin broadened under his mustache and he silently nodded encouragement to her. "Alrighty," he spoke briskly into the phone as he turned back to the wall. "See y'around 10? 'Kay." He hung up the phone with a reverberating ring.

"What, dad?" Bella breathed.

Charlie turned around with visible relief softening his face. "That old hard-ass was stone walling me good until I said you were coming," he chuckled, with an amused shake of his head. "Maybe he thinks I'll go easy on 'em if you're hanging around."

Bella grinned as she pulled her coffee into both palms. "You might, but I won't," she avowed with a theatrical quirk of a brow.

Charlie snorted and mussed her hair as he walked back to the table. "Just go slow, Bells," he warned under his breath.

Bella nodded absently. She wasn't sure what her plan was yet - she had all the time it took to throw together a lasagna and maybe a batch or two of cookies to think about it. But one way or another, Bella was going to get some answers.

Even if they weren't the ones she wanted to hear.

'

In the morning light everything looked just a little more hopeless. Jacob sat on the top step under the overhang of Sam and Emily's porch and watched the grey morning weep melancholy over the grassy yard. The rain pattered in puddles and tapped on leaves like fingers typing his own eulogy into the fledgling day.

Last night had been a _disaster_.

"Jake, I brought you some coffee."

Jacob turned around to see Emily pushing open the screen with her shoulder, carrying a mug in each hand. In a preternatural flash he was at her side, holding it open for the woman. She offered him that brilliant half smile as she continued out onto the porch on a course for the same spot he'd just vacated.

He took the offered mug from her hand as she sat down on one side of the steps and, after a moment's hesitation, he lowered himself down beside her.

"Thanks," he murmured, taking a sip.

"Mm hmm," she hummed as she cupped her own herbal tea between her palms and stared out over the yard. Jacob watched her out of the corner of his eye. From this side, she looked like nothing more than a beautiful girl - youthfully carefree and happy.

She turned to face him and the illusion shattered along with his heart - as it did every single time. "He's finally sleeping," she said softly.

Jacob pressed his lips together with a curt nod. "Good," he said simply.

Emily's nostrils flared as her pensive gaze fell down to the puddles at the foot of the stairs. "He got control a little faster this time, didn't he?" she asked the ground - there was a desperate hopefulness in her voice. "He's doing a little better."

Jacob knew she didn't really want his empty reassurances - she said the words to make them true. He took a sip from the coffee and stared out into the trees.

"I'm sorry about last night, Em," he offered her a stoic apology instead - he couldn't afford to let emotion bleed into the words. Regret was a luxury Jacob didn't have, even if he'd fucked up.

And he had… royally.

"I understand," she said quietly. It was a statement that encompassed many, many things. She sniffed a laugh and took another sip from her tea. "And really, Paul _deserved_ that one," she mused, glancing at him with a redemptive smile in her eyes anyway.

In another life he would have contradicted her with self-contempt, but in this one he had to swallow his own self doubt with a brusque nod of agreement.

At last night's Pack meeting, the wolf had already been craving violence in the very worst way so he'd locked his wolf in iron-clad restraint and had coaxed the imprints to stay in the kitchen. Having a wolf as dominant as Paul, so brazenly sniff around his mate was simply unacceptable. Especially since - even if it was only part of an ill-conceived and perhaps well-meaning plan - Jacob had smelled that the fucker had also vicariously gotten off on Bella's feminine reactions.

The wolf wanted to kill him - clean and simple. The Alpha in him demanded at least a bloodprice as vengeance. The man needed to keep the peace and his sanity. Jacob was fighting a battle that couldn't be won.

So when Paul had walked into that invisible war - ten brazen minutes late to the Pack meeting - it had been the second biggest mistake of his life.

The first being that he was also reeking of sex.

Jacob had unequivocally lost it.

Of course, only seconds later, so had Sam (however in this case it probably saved Paul's life). Many hours and a destroyed living room later, Jacob had finally been able to coax Sam back to human from the precipice of feral madness. Having such violence in the same house as his pregnant mate had pushed him over the edge. They'd been lucky to get him back.

Jacob released a long slow breath and took another slurping sip of coffee.

"Jake, everyone understands," Emily whispered suddenly.

Jacob cut his eyes over to where she was idly dragging her teabag through the liquid by the little paper square. She looked up from under her lashes. "Even Paul," she murmured cannily.

Truth be known _that_ was what bothered him the most about last night. As his Packmates had dragged a bloody pummeled Paul out of the house so Jacob could deal with a berserker wolf, Jacob had _seen_ the frantic desperation and hurt that pushed that slurred apology over his ruined lips.

And Jacob was ashamed.

Paul was all about machismo and swagger, but under that facade was really a boy fighting an abusive past for approval. Which was precisely why Jacob might have had to put him in his place more times than he could count, but he'd _never_ hit him.

Until yesterday. Yesterday, he'd made up for lost time.

Jacob blinked several times and dispassionately took another sip from his coffee, swallowing his distress down along with bile and café au lait.

_God, they were all so fucked up. _And he couldn't talk about this shit with anyone: never show weakness… _especially_ if you already had.

He rearranged his hands on the mug - he was dancing on shattering it in his death-grip. "How are _you_ doing, Em?" he asked quietly, trying to redirect his thoughts.

She considered him a moment. "Good," she answered with a purse to her lips and a cock to her head. "Tired, but good."

Jacob worked his jaw back and forth for a moment and turned his body toward her. "No," he set the coffee down on the porch with a soft clack and leaned over his thighs. "How're you _really_ doing?" he asked cryptically.

Emily's brow raised as her eyes darted between his for a moment. Sam was always tense when she was around other males - especially one as dominant as Jacob - so they rarely got time alone to talk. It just wasn't worth the stress to Sam. Every lupine instinct that ran through them all had been jacked up to the extreme in his instability. Like PTSD…on crack.

She sniffed in a sharp breath through her nose and nodded. "Would you believe me if I said I'm really pretty good?" she let the words bounce over an amused chuckle - like it was an utterly absurd request. (For the record, it was.)

Jacob let a smile soften his mouth, urging her on - he could see her trying to sift through information she herself hadn't really had the time or attention to piece together.

"I mean, Sam kinda drives me nuts when you guys are around," she sniffed, rolling her eyes. "But when it's just the girls, or we're alone?" She sat back against the railing and a smile softened her entire face. "He's really perfect, Jay," she murmured quietly. She blinked a few thoughtful times and then met his gaze. "I mean, would I have ever dreamed that I'd be engaged to a wolf and pregnant at twenty? No," she barked an incredulous laugh. "But Sam's a good man, Jay. He's kind, loving, he gives me my space to paint if I want it, he listens me to babble about - God, everything. He _likes_ my cooking," she smirked.

Jacob sniffed, as his gaze dipped to the ground. "Hey, you've got those muffins down, Em," he chuckled.

"That's about all, huh?" She slapped his thigh playfully.

"Who the hell cares, Em?" Jacob shrugged. "You're a painter not a cook." She was a much better artist - in the kitchen she was notorious for forgetting little things like key ingredients or timers.

He looked back up and searched her eyes for a moment. "So… you're happy?" he asked quietly. He wanted to believe this line of questioning was purely out of selfless concern for his Pack, but Jacob wasn't very good at lying, especially to himself. What he _wanted_ to do was ask her what she thought about the imprint. He _wanted_ to know how this was for a girl… for obvious reasons. But such a vulnerable question was simply unacceptable to his pride and position.

He watched thoughts play behind her eyes while Emily's gaze flitted over his face. "It hurts me to see Sam so torn up, Jay," she whispered. "On his good days, we can talk about _everything_: my face, his illness, our fears. Our child," her gaze dropped down to her lap and one hand slipped to her rounding belly. "He's my best friend but I…" her voice caught in her throat.

Biting her lip, she tucked her head a little further as she audibly swallowed. "I just wish there weren't so many scars," the words stumbled in a rasp over her lips.

Jacob exhaled a long breath into the sound of her fledgling tears. He reached out and gently took the tea from her shaking grasp, gathering her hand in both of his.

"Sorry," she wept.

"Shh," he soothed, rubbing his fingers over her wrist as he let his wolf's power well up with calming warmth around them. A low reflex lupine purr rippled up from his diaphragm.

Emily scooted closer, leaning her forehead into his shoulder as her breath hitched with quiet sorrow. In another time and place he would have pulled her into one of the warm embraces that used to be his hallmark, but now his job was to give his Pack strength not sympathy.

After several moments of letting her anguish leak out in a tight controlled trickle, he chose his words. They couldn't be empty words of comfort - sweetening the truth with white lies wasn't an option for him anymore.

"I think Sam's fighting hard, Em. He's really trying and he's getting a little better. Slowly, yeah. But we're still learning about all this shit - you know that."

Emily squeezed her eyes closed and nodded against him, tears racing over the rippling scars.

"He's just so focused on you and the baby right now that he's not taking very good care of himself and I think that's slowing him down," he continued quietly. "You and I both need to work on that and I got some ideas."

Emily nodded again, slipping her other hand over his big knuckles and squeezing tightly. "Okay," she choked, visibly pulling the shattered pieces of her heart back together. With a sharp sniffle, she lifted her head, pulling her hands from Jacob's grip to wipe them brusquely over her cheeks. "Gosh, hormones I guess," she laughed thinly, looking up at him with a brave attempt at a watery smile.

He met her eyes with intensity. "It's been hard Em… and you're doing fucking awesome," he whispered solemnly. He tried not to swear in front of the girls, but this particular situation merited it.

He could see the corresponding courage and strength gather in the subtle lift of her chin.

"And you know you're not raising this kid alone, right?" he murmured, his voice deep and velvet. "We'll stand by you both."

"I know Jake," she whispered, wiping her cheeks again and squaring her shoulders. "We have a Pack of babysitters," she laughed softly.

Jacob smiled. "Much more than that, Em." His sincerity hardened his gaze.

Her eyes darted between his for a moment as the mobile side of her face slowly ripened in a smile. Finally she gave him a quick nod, as she turned around and grabbed up her tea.

Embry and Jared had been respectfully waiting at the edge of the treeline for their Alpha to finish and signal them. Jacob readjusted his limbs and pulled his own coffee back into his hands, nodding his ready out to the yard.

Emily's gaze snapped out to the movement as the two men walked - grim and unhurried - through the drizzle. The rain glistened on their bare chests and slickened their hair.

"Thanks, Jay," Emily turned back to him, understanding in her eyes.

Jacob nodded briskly. She made a move to stand, and his hand shot out to support her elbow. She smiled gratefully and unfolded to her feet, glancing at where the other two were padding down the muddy path.

"Oh, but Jake?" she turned back to him. "If you're asking me whether I'd change the imprint…" she looked intensely into his eyes. "Even with how hard everything's has been…" She took a step up onto the porch. "I'd still say no."

Jacob looked up at her as his jaw subtly clenched. Her astute deconstruction made an irrational irritation charge through him with a prickling heat.

"I'm glad you're happy," he replied crisply, trying to keep the annoyance out of his voice and only marginally succeeding.

The blush that rushed to Emily's cheeks showed that she knew she'd overstepped her bounds. She dropped her gaze. "Let me go check on Sam," she murmured, and quickly crossed the porch toward the door.

With a flare to his nostrils, Jacob turned back around. Embry and Jared were reflecting back Emily's same unspoken concern and something in him wanted to shove both fists between both sets of worried eyes. Jacob flashed his canines in a not-so-subtle warning and the men quickly rearranged their faces.

In the wreckage and rubble of the wee hours, he'd formally announced that he had imprinted and told them he was handling it, but nothing else. None of them would be fool enough to ask him more. But the covert reactions incited by the mere subject confirmed his suspicions: they were all scared shitless.

In part their reaction was because they'd all grown to rely on the fact that the Pack was their Alpha's complete and utter focus. There was - in a rather childish and unexamined way - a furtive jealousy about it. But the elephant in the room was they'd seen what it had done to Sam. Neither Quil nor Jared were dominants. They had easily slipped into sexual romances that had been welcomed by their intendeds - Jared was a jock used to a cheerleader on his arm and Quil wasn't sophisticated enough to give a damn about stigma ("I love her and she'll grow," - quote, unquote with a shrug and a gawky laugh).

But for Jacob, both the stakes _and_ the obstacles were just so much higher.

Jared cleared his throat and took the first step. "Collin Littlesea and Brady Fuller _are_ both showing the signs," he announced with no preamble. Jacob quickly tucked all his personal turmoil away as he focused his mind on their most recent conundrum. Quil had come last night with news from his grandfather that two young boys - in Claire's grade - were sick with a severe flu.

"In fact, they're probably just a few days away from Phasing," he announced.

"Fuck," Jacob huffed out on a harsh breath as he shoved a hand through his hair. This was the _last_ thing he needed right now.

Jared sighed, squeegeeing the water from his face as he propped an elbow against the railing.

"They're pretty young, aren't they?" Embry murmured, propping one foot on the bottom stair.

Jacob nodded, taking a tasteless gulp from his coffee and setting it down beside him.

"I thought the Clearwaters were the last ones from the bloodline," Jared mused.

"They're back right?" Embry asked quietly.

Jacob nodded, rubbing his palms pensively on his knees. Leah and Seth had spent the summer with relatives on the Makah reservation. She'd been engaged to marry Sam this very summer before he'd imprinted- it had been a clusterfuck. And it continued to be.

"We can't trust the legends for shit," Jacob snarled. "Fourteen year olds, bloodlines … none of it." (He left out imprinting, but that was sitting silently on the face of his words like a zit that was ready to pop.)

With a low grow, Jacob unfolded from the steps.

Both Jared and Embry stiffened and took unintentional steps back down the stairs.

Jacob ignored them and raked his hands through his hair back to the nape of his neck, stretching and flexing his muscles that were growing cagier by the minute. He looked back down to two sets of lowered eyes and scents that were piqued with wariness.

He sniffed a humorless laugh. If anyone had told him 15 months ago that he'd elicit fear in _anyone_ just by stretching he'd have laughed in their face. An unfettered, good-natured, belly-aching laugh. The kind he never did anymore.

_God they were all so __royally__ fucked up._

"Quil's got patrols, right?" Jacob asked, trying to soothe his second.

Jared's gaze popped back up and he nodded. "With this weather we're going to have to cover the daylight hours for a while," he grimaced at the skies as he wiped his wet hair back from his face. The rare sun this summer was the only break from their grueling schedule they got - leeches hated the sun like the demons they were.

"Yeah, go chill a little with Kim and we'll meet this afternoon after I've talked with Billy…and Emb, switch out with Quil at noon, will you?" He made it a question to soften the undeniable command as his friend looked up with a curt nod.

"I'm gonna head over to talk to dad," Jacob informed them as he jogged down the stairs. They parted automatically for him and he strode out across the sodden grass without a backward glance.

"Hey Jake," Embry called behind him. "Can I walk with you?"

Jacob glanced over his shoulder at his friend's face. It gave away nothing, but he had his suspicions: as his friend, Embry was the only one of them who'd dare broach the subject of Bella. With brusque jerk of his chin, Jacob continued on.

Embry fell in step beside him and they walked in silence. The rain continued to spit from the sky, hitting the leaves around them as they walked into the woods, following the road just behind the screen of trees. The leaves underfoot felt like soggy cornflakes and made soft sopping sounds. In the distance, a lone bird called out a rather pitiful lament against the weather.

Jacob drew in a long slow breath of the scents of musty forest floor. "What is it, Emb?" Jacob sighed out on his inhale.

Embry licked his lips nervously. "Bella knows, Jake," he whispered.

Jacob's head snapped around to pin his friend with a fierce stare.

"Or she's putting it together," he amended, with an apologetic squint.

His feet stopped cold. "What?" he bit the word out, his mind instantly exploding into a hundred different disparate shards.

Embry heaved a sigh. "When I took her home…" He brushed aside his clinging hair as his gaze paced between Jacob's steely stare. "She was in shock… I think."

Jacob's gaze dipped to the ground in shame before he forced it back up, all emotions evaporating in his razor focus on what Embry was telling him.

"She was scared of me…flinching and shivering and shit. I think she'd put two and two together. That we're both…" he tipped his head. "Y'know, the same," he grimaced. "But before I left… she just looked up at me and said…'wolf.'"

Jacob's eyes closed slowly as he released a long breath from his cheeks. "What'd you say?" he asked lowly, an air of defeat to the words.

"Well it shocked the hell out of me," he laughed humorlessly. "But I didn't _say_ anything. I just told her she shouldn't come back."

Jacob's eyes popped back open to Embry's gentle concern. He could see his friend's worry clearly reflected in his deep, searching gaze - Jacob might have appeased the Pack to some extent with his hard lines and squared shoulders, but Embry wasn't fooled for a second. For Jacob to see his own heart worn so openly on his friend's sleeve somehow just made it worse. A lot worse.

"Good," Jacob bit out tersely with a lift to his chin and immediately started walking again.

After a second he heard Embry follow after him.

Jacob splayed out a warning hand behind him keeping his gaze stoically trained straight ahead. "I gotta be alone," he growled.

Marching like a one man army, Jacob trudged through silent misty forest trying desperately to shuck away his wolf's incessant pining for his mate that had been awoken deep in the marrow of his being at the first glance into her eyes. He felt like he was shadowboxing in quicksand - each thrust and parry at the insidious curse just pulled him in deeper. The compulsion the wolf felt to chase her down was becoming a debilitating obsession.

Collapsing on a soggy fallen tree, Jacob covered his face with his quivering hands, and took a moment for himself.

It just pulled him further under.

'

"Crap!" Bella squawked.

"You alright?" Billy called from his chair while her father shot to his feet from the couch. The oblivious television babbled blithely on.

Bella bit the finger of the yellow plastic glove and yanked it from her hand and then spat it out to the floor with a grimacing splutter at the taste of Pine Sol. She pulled the other off and clapped it to her gouged and bleeding elbow, courtesy of the open kitchen drawer behind her.

"Yeah, just another home run," she snorted. "Kitchen drawer: one - Bella: zilch."

Charlie's hand wrapped around her arm. "Lemme see," he chuckled.

Bella rolled her eyes and let him examine the gash. "I don't think it's life threatening," she snorted.

"Ouch, kid," Charlie frowned, as he gently turned it toward him.

"There's some bandages up in the cabinet by the fridge," Billy called.

While Bella rinsed the cut out under the faucet, her father crossed to the indicated cupboard and opened doors until he found it - at the very top.

"Don't you think you should have this somewhere you can reach it?" her father laughingly complained, stretching up and bringing down a box that would put Red Cross to shame: bandages, gauze, ointments, vet wrap. It looked like it was stocked for a warzone.

"It's Jake's," Billy answered quietly.

Bella glanced over her shoulder; the man was watching her intently. He'd been stealing covert glances her way all morning. Under any other circumstances she might just think it was misplaced guilt over her cleaning spree.

The house _was_ a mess.

Bella had spent the first half of a slow-as-hell Mariner's game doing dishes, cleaning floors and countertops, two loads of laundry, and scrubbing mildew out of the tub. Her father made a pretty good wingman, she'd discovered. He'd soothed Billy's uncomfortable complaints with distractions and assurances and tall silver cans of Rainer beer.

And truth be told, Bella didn't mind one bit. While she cleaned up after her mom all the time out of necessity, this was something she simply wanted to do (at least this once). And it was certainly a far kinder fate than being forced to watch boring old baseball which - in her opinion - was about as stimulating as watching paint dry (as she'd pointed out several times). The distraction was certainly welcome from that anxiety that sat in the marrow of her bones. While she scrubbed and cleaned and washed, she could almost forget her worries. Almost.

Here, immersed in the familiar surroundings of many a childhood summer, she could delude herself that any moment that same sunny boy would walk through that door any minute with some goofy joke or an exuberant smile. But deep down, she knew he wouldn't. That wasn't Jacob any more.

The more she steeped herself in the past, the more she wanted answers about the present, and that intense stare of Billy's (that was still holding her captive from the living room) just might be silently offering some if she answered the right questions.

She tore her gaze away from the man's hypnotic intensity at feel of a cold spritz on her arm. Looking down she saw her father misting the gash just above her elbow with some kind of antibiotic, before affixing a nice-sized bandage over the damage.

"So who's winning?" Bella asked blithely.

Charlie looked up with a smirk in his eyes. "One guess."

Bella grinned. "_Not_ the Mariners?"

"Yep," he smacked his lips blandly as he patted her arm and balled up the band-aid wrapping. "But we're only just finished the fourth."

"Gosh it's the game that never ends," Bella sighed with mock exasperation.

Charlie gave her a saccharine grin from under his mustache and tossed the trash in the garbage can. "It's almost time for lunch, huh?" he noted idly, glancing at the time on the microwave.

End of an inning. Before lunch. Most of the cleaning was done. She glanced over her shoulder - Billy was still staring.

It was now or never.

"Hey dad, can you pick up a few things at Cody's before lunch?" Bella returned her gaze to her elbow and pulled down the sleeve of Jacob's old shirt nervously.

Charlie paused and rubbed his hands on his thighs. "Yeah sure, Bells," he pursed his lips. "Whattaya need?"

"Just a few things," she hedged, crossing to the counter to grab a pen out of the cup by the phone and an old receipt as she desperately wracked her brain for something… _anything_.

"Um… I want a diet coke…" she began. _Damn, she was definitely not Jason Bourne._

Her father's eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"And, uh… how about some garlic bread for the lasagna?" she asked brightly, thrilled to find something that was actually somewhat necessary. She scribbled it down happily. "Oh, and they need some more garbage bags and dish soap." _Yes, now she was on a roll._

Her father glanced over at his friend and then back to Bella thrusting out his palm for the note. "Alright, anything else?" He arched a doubtful brow as he tucked the note in the front pocket of his flannel.

"Nope," she smiled, pleased that her little plan was working so far.

"I don't suppose you wanna come, huh?"

"Um, I gotta reheat the lasagna?" It came out as more of a question.

Her father considered her a moment and then turned to Billy. " 'You wanna come for a ride?"

Bella's stomach took a nose dive and she glanced nervously over her shoulder. Billy was still watching her with those inscrutable eyes.

"Naw, Chief," he said, holding her gaze. "Why don't I stay here an' keep Bella company."

Bella released a quiet breath of relief while her father glanced between them, understanding finally falling over his face.

Bella met his gaze and he nodded infinitesimally as he absently patted his pocket.

"Let me give y'a twenty, Charlie," Billy offered, breaking the moment between them.

"Naw, that ain't necessary," Charlie deflected.

Bella blinked and pulled her lip into her mouth as she pushed off the counter. While her father and Billy negotiated, she turned the oven on and pulled out the foil covered lasagna from their now much-better-stocked fridge. Charlie's suspicions had been right - there'd been next to nothing in the Black's ice box except for takeout left-overs.

She then traipsed down the hall and out the back door to the little laundry area outside. She pulled out warm fresh towels and sheets out of the dryer and replaced them with the wet load of Billy's clothes. This would be all the dirty clothes in the house - except whatever was in Jacob's room. She hadn't felt comfortable opening that door without his permission.

Starting the machine, she turned around and leaned her hip against it, taking a moment to steel herself for whatever came next. She looked out over the dripping woods behind their house while her mind spun over the sound of water filling the washing basin and the drizzle tapping restlessly on the corrugated roof overhead.

This might be her only chance - and she didn't exactly have the best track record for deception. She needed to gather together everything she wanted to ask. And that meant _everything_.

For the first time she allowed her mind to revisit the supernatural possibilities she'd considered in the throes of yesterday's adrenaline and fear. Standing outside the Black's homey, familiar house and surrounded by the quiet rain and very mundane sounds of laundry, her theory seemed utterly laughable - but they were the only things she had. And how much was this the same confusing self-doubt in the face of the impossible that all heroines felt? She suddenly understood just how hard it would be for Lois Lane to actually suspect that Clark Kent was Superman in the movies (she used to yell at the screen in frustration over her cluelessness while Jacob laughed).

No she was going to ask _all_ her questions, even if she felt stupid. Heck, maybe Billy would take pity on her and tell her what was really going on.

Hauling up the plastic basket, she set her jaw with determination and tottered up the few wooden steps to the back door while the washing-machine launched into action behind her. She pulled open the screen door awkwardly and pushed into the dark hallway headed toward the muddled din of the television. She walked hesitantly toward the living room, feeling like each footstep was some ominous death toll.

Billy was sitting serenely in his chair, his eyes casually watching the screen. He looked up when she walked in, fixing her with that same unfathomable intensity. He clicked the television off with the remote in his lap.

Bella's gaze dropped to the jumble of sheets in the basket as her courage fizzled.

"Lemme help you with that, Bella," Billy called quietly.

Bella nodded, feeling suddenly insecure as she shuffled into the room. She set the basket down by his wheelchair and crumpled to their worn, freshly-vacuumed rag rug beside the couch.

Bill reached down to the basket and pulled out a towel, watching her closely.

Bella tucked her head and pulled out another towel.

"I really appreciate you doin' this, Bella," he murmured as his wrinkled hands deftly folded the towel in his lap.

Bella pulled her lip into the corner of her mouth and nodded.

"I mean I _know_ you're not doin' this for me," he chuckled softly.

She looked up and met his sparkling gaze.

"I s'pect you're still pretty mad that I been lyin' to you all those times on the phone," he confessed cryptically.

Bella sucked in a soft breath as her hands stilled on warm terrycloth.

"Some things just can't be helped though," he smiled serenely and tossed his own folded towel to the couch.

Bella quickly finished her folding and did the same. She pulled out a pillowcase. "You can't tell me what's going on?" she ventured, not meeting his eyes.

"Not my story to tell, honey," he murmured sadly. "Not anymore."

Was that a covert clue? Bella looked up to his pursed lips, still doubting herself. Spinelessly she decided to go for safe. "Is he going to be alright?" she whispered.

Billy sat back in his chair as he drew in a deep breath. "Depends. But things will work out some way or another," he sighed, that infamous impassive expression slipping over his face.

Bella's brow furrowed as a flash of indignation lit in her gut. "How can you be so _calm_?" she accused, before she could really think better of it. "Why don't you _care_?"

Billy's brow raised. "Oh I care alright," he sniffed, reaching back into the basket. "But there's just some things you can't control - most things, matter of fact. If you get all worked up, it don't do nobody any good."

Bella frowned in confusion and tossed the pillow case to the couch and pulled out a sheet. Billy reached over and took the other end with a glance to her eyes. Bella stood and pulled it taut between them as they silently choreographed folding the large bed linen.

"See, I had a real hard time when Sarah passed," he said quietly as his hands brought together the two corners of the cloth. "But it taught me something: no matter how much you wanna take a hold a' life and beat it into goin' the way you want it, it just don't work like that. You never know how long you got, so you gotta be grateful for what you have each minute," he paused licking his lips as Bella walked forward and took the corners from his hands and finished the fold.

She was listening carefully to the unspoken grief in his voice while her mind furiously spun. The sadness was fresh and raw: he was grieving not only for his wife but for Jacob too.

"So I just try to do the best I can with whatever comes my way," he smiled sadly and let his hands fall to the armrests of his chair. "Which ain't easy when you're a lame old man."

"You're _not lame_!" Bella jumped in with an automatic defensiveness. He was right, she was kind of angry with him, but he'd always been like a second father and she was still fiercely protective.

"You kids," Billy's face cracked in a smile. "Not like _that_. Lame, the other way," he chuckled, patting his thighs meaningfully.

A single laugh burst from her lips at her idiocy. Rolling her eyes she tossed the sheet down on the couch and pulled out another. The old warmth between them had been rekindled by the gaffe, and it relaxed her enough that she could brave the question she really wanted to ask.

Bella took a deep breath as she walked backward, stretching another sheet out between them. "What would you say if I asked you if those stories you and Old Quil used to tell were real?" she pushed the question out on one breath as she squinted against his reaction.

Billy's hands stilled on the sheet and his face went utterly serious. "I'd say I always thought you were a real clever girl, Bella," he whispered.

Bella froze, her face slipping lax, feeling like ice water had be let in her veins. _She was right?_ For several seconds - or maybe hours - she just stared at him. He stared right on back with his signature dispassion and dark sober eyes.

"So if the stories were true then men would turn into wolves?" she asked in a high cracking voice - maybe he was thinking of different stories.

"Yes," he replied simply, the intensity of his eyes belying the casual confirmation.

Blinking rapidly, Bella tugged the half folded sheet from his hands and balled it up against her chest. Her hands were now shaking. Suddenly time seemed very short - Cody's General Store wasn't far, and there was so much more to know. She tossed the sheet back in the basket and slipped back down to the floor. Questions were clamoring in her mind - she didn't know the right one to ask!

"So like on a full moon?" she quavered. That's not how the stories went, but damn it, she couldn't even think straight the implications were so overwhelming.

Billy took pity on her and reached down and pulled her trembling hand into his on his lap. "No, you remember the stories, Bella. Our ancestors were shapeshifters, not werewolves," he began in the same low soothing voice he'd used over summer bonfire flames. "When a warrior comes of age, he learns to change at will. It's real painful at first and makes 'em grow in a matter of weeks into men."

Bella swallowed thickly, as her leaden gaze fell down to her lap with the sheer weight of what he was saying. And how much it explained. _Oh my God!_

"Strong emotion controls the change - anger, frustration, sadness. They Phase into wolves as big as a horse. Taha Aki made them to do one thing, and one thing only: protect humans from the Cold Ones," he whispered, patting her quivering hand soothingly. "Or so the legends say."

Bella looked back up as shock coursed through her veins like a wildfire. "Vampires?" she squeaked.

"That's what you call them," he affirmed quietly.

_Vampires were real too? Oh, this was __way__ too much to deal with right now. _Bella squeezed her eyes shut and tugged her hand from Billy's as she wrapped both around her middle, trying to hold the emotional and intellectual maelstrom in the weak confines of skin.

_Jacob_. There wasn't much time, she needed to focus on Jake.

"So," she swallowed thickly and looked back up into his steady eyes. "If the stories were true, what would it be like for one of those wolf guys?"

Billy sniffed in a deep breath and sat back, considering his words while holding her gaze. "There'd be a lot of anger, I expect. His life would get taken away. He'd go from a kid who loves cars and rock music to a man who has to kill. It would be a secret too," he leaned forward intensely. "It'd be a real important secret to keep."

Bella blinked under the weight of his gaze and nodded briskly. "I mean what if the law found out? Or the government?" she agreed, just letting him know she understood. All those crazy ideas of the government experimenting on Quileute boys wasn't so far off after all. Bella shuddered thinking about Jacob or Embry locked in some lab like rats.

"So since it's a secret there'd also be a lot of loneliness, I expect," he continued, drawing her gaze back to his. "Family, friends, the tribe… no one would know."

Bella worried her lip. "Why are you telling _me_?" she burst out.

A sly smile quirked Billy's lips. "Now I ain't tellin' you nothing, girl. We're just chewin' the fat about some old stories."

Bella nodded, but she couldn't find it in her to smile.

"But some of the men from the legends had it harder than others," he continued softly. "Take Jacob's great-grandfather, Ephraim Black. He was the leader, the Alpha. It was his job to take care of the Pack and the tribe. He had to be strong, even when he didn't feel like it," his voice dropped off to a whisper. "Even when he's hurtin' inside. And he _is_ hurtin', honey."

Bella's heart stopped in her chest - Billy had used the present tense and the message was clear as crystal. She clutched her hands over it as she rocked with the impact. "So if the stories were true, Jacob would be the leader too?"

"It goes by bloodline, Bella," Billy answered over a sigh. "Jake would be the leader. The Alpha. And his wolf would be the strongest of them all."

Bella nodded numbly as her hands crept up over her mouth. She'd drew her body into a tight ball on the floor, simply overwhelmed by it all. "What does Jake need? What can help him?" she breathed between her fingers, all pretenses forgotten in pure anguished worry.

"Bella…" he called softly.

She looked up to concern glistening in his black eyes.

"C'mere honey," he held out weathered hands. The words and his voice reminded her so much of Jacob, a soft sob caught in her throat. Before she really knew what she was doing, she was springing forward into his embrace. She wrapped her arms around his knees and leaned her cheek on his thigh as Billy's warm heavy arms encircled her back.

The tears of stress and heartache finally broke free and Bella cried quietly into the worn denim of his jeans.

"Shh," he soothed as his hand stroked her hair back from her cheek. He let her cry for several minutes before he spoke again, in thick tender words cut from soft felt.

"What he needs is someone to remind him that even though everything's changed, his heart is still the same," he whispered. "There's an animal that shares his soul now and that's a might frightening thing, I expect. He's always fighting it. Instinct is a powerful thing and the wolf is fierce because a warrior needs to be to protect his tribe."

Bella sniffled wretchedly, pressing her cheek further into Billy's comfort as she nodded against him.

"So he needs someone to show him that he's still human," the man crooned. "That he can love and be loved." He leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to her hair and then straightened again with a pat to her back.

Bella took the cue and sat back on her heels, slapping at her tears. "Make him feel n-normal?" she hiccupped.

The lines of Billy's face relaxed into a smile. "Now you got it," he nodded in approval. "I always thought you were a real clever girl, Bella."

Bella bit her lip and sniffled juicily. Feeling numb, stiff and spent, she turned back to the basket, _needing_ the mundane to settle her roiling thoughts. She knew on some level she was in shock - trying to imagine the giant wolves and warrior princes of childhood fairytale was hard enough; trying to imagine her best friend as one was simply unfathomable.

Billy seemed to understand. With a flick of his wrist, he snatched up the remote and an announcer's boring drone awoke from the chunky television set. Being submersed in the commonplace, was exactly what Bella needed to shore up the battered and breached borders of life as she had known it. If this was so hard for her to merely _imagine_, how grueling had it been for him to _experience_? She couldn't bear the thought that he'd suffered and she hadn't been here to help.

She silently folded these thoughts away along with the rest of the laundry while Billy wordlessly helped and pretended to watch the television. However, he was covertly watching her instead but Bella wouldn't meet his eyes. She couldn't.

Chewing on her lip like a madwoman, Bella tucked her head and stood, collecting the folded linens from the couch and replacing them in the plastic basket. With a long sigh at many, many things, Bella hoisted the laundry up on her hip and turned toward the hallway without a word.

"You alright, honey?" Billy's dusky voice made her stop in her tracks.

She turned around to concern set into the serene veneer of his gaze. Now that she knew how hard he was trying to hold it together when things were falling apart around him - and had been for a while - she could recognize it easily.

She forced a smile and nodded hesitantly. "It's just-…."

The front door slammed open with a bang that shattered her words in a gasp. Bella whipped around to the entire doorway being filled by a massive body who's sleek rain-slicked musculature was slithering like it was alive under melted caramel skin.

"Jake." His name came out in a whimper.

He blinked rapidly, his lashes fluttering frantically like trapped moths against his cheeks and then strained a harsh breath through gritted teeth. At its apex it was like someone had snipped a cord and his jerking muscles instantly tensed to rock-solid attention, the lines of his face hardening into stony intensity.

It was such a drastic change, that Bella dropped the basket to the floor with hollow thump. Jacob's eyes snapped down to the bin with an alert caginess and then slithered back up her body to her face.

Behind his eyes was an incandescent fire - luminous, smoldering.

Bella's breath caught in her throat. It was that same feral foreignness from the garage that made her heart stutter indecisively between a sprint and simple surrender.

"Jacob," Billy's voice had hardened into a demanding baritone that made Bella's own gaze snap to the man in surprise. He was slowly wheeling his chair into the middle of the room.

Between Jacob and herself.

"Calm down now son," he crooned, soothingly melodic. "Bella's just here helpin' out a little."

Jacob hadn't so much as glanced at his father. He idly tipped his head to the side to step through a doorway that would have brushed the top of his hair. The movement was all liquid power like he'd simply congealed inside the room. He cocked his head to the other side - an undeniable lupine movement - as those glowing eyes flitted over her with contrasting anxiety to that crisp controlled strength.

"Bella, honey," Billy's velvet voice cracked with tension. "When his eyes are like this, he don't have control," he whispered.

A wash of adrenaline slipped down her body like an icy silk shift as she automatically took a step back. Jacob's body jerked like livewire in response, his chin dipping down so that those strange eyes were staring from under his heavy brow in an irrefutable predator's scowl.

With a little squeak of fear, Bella stumbled back several steps and a low an inhuman growl rippled under the oblivious din of the television.

"Jacob!" Billy literally bellowed it this time as he jerked his chair fully to face his son while he simultaneously slapped the remote. The room was swallowed into silence and then Bella could hear it. _Jacob_ had made that animalistic sound… and it was still scurrying from his chest in grating waves.

Still his eyes hadn't wavered from her for a second. He took one slinking step forward and then another.

"Jacob Black!" Billy barked.

In one frighteningly fluid movement he'd sprung up from the floor - his fingers bracing the summit of his agile leap against the ceiling - and vaulted completely over his father.

His huge, powerful body fell back to the floor like a throw of silk.

With a squeak of terror, Bella's feet backed up, her widened gaze staying locked on those frightening eyes.

While that growl scuttled across the room before him, each of her steps was mirrored by his mercury slink, his entire body pouring into each quivering step. Prowling, stalking.

_Jake. This was only Jacob Black - her childhood playmate, her best friend_. Her mind frantically scrabbled against the loose gravel of million comforting memories, searching for traction as her body instinctually fled in self-preservative panic from the prowling predator before her.

She hadn't even noticed when wood floors had turned into linoleum, but suddenly her back was hitting the kitchen counter, jarring her with the realization… that she was trapped.

Nostrils flaring with each of his heaving breaths, Jacob continued his slinking approach and Bella shut her eyes, her fists squeezing up to rigid shoulders as her body shuddered.

"Jake! You're scaring me!" she shrilled.

The ensuing silence was as loud as thunder.

Bella's breath hitched as she pulled her elbows tighter to her sides, trying to get her bearings.

That deep rumbling growl had instantly shriveled up into uneven rasping pants. They sounded inches away. They were - she could feel the warmth of his body, seeping over skin, billowing over her cheeks… along with his scent: musky, settled, sweet.

Like autumn leaves and twilight promises.

Something about it relaxed her infinitesimally . It was a chemical reaction - accomplishing in an instant what her rational mind had failed at miserably. She drew in a long silent breath through her nose and felt tension viscerally slip lax like she'd been injected with a sedative.

_He'd never hurt her._

That truth materialized like a whisper and snaked its way up her body, taking root deep in the fertile soil of her being. There it bloomed with absolute certainty and Bella's eyes ventured open.

Jacob's heaving chest was mere inches away, his massive body taking up the whole of her periphery. That unnatural heat had already his dried his skin to matte crepe over muscles that were quivering and jerking. Slowly her rigid body unfurled like a fiddlehead fern, her gaze cataloging smooth powerful pecks and harsh cut clavicle, thick chorded deltoid and jutting masculine Adam's apple.

His gaze was fixed down her body with a feral intensity that made her suck a breath in through teeth. Up close she could see that she'd been a fool to try to justify away those animal eyes as a trick of the light; they were utterly and inexplicably inhuman. With the prismatic flecks of yellow flame swirling around cavernous pupils there could be no denying…

_Wolf_.

At the same time fierce and afraid…they oozed a soul-deep angst that took her breath away like a fist to the gut.

And Billy was right: Jacob was hurting.

Bella blinked, her eyes darting down, trying to follow that eerie, hollow stare. And then she realized: he was staring at the bandage on her arm. In a flash of insight she understood.

Bella licked her lips and his gaze snapped down to her mouth like a steel trap. "Jacob, I'm okay," she breathed. It was nothing but a hoarse hollow whisper.

At the sound he blinked, a pucker appearing between those fierce brows like he was struggling to understand the words.

Slowly her elbows were relaxing from their fearful clasp against her sides. Those eyes - which were now stuck on her mouth - were aching and confused. It made her heart clench painfully and for just a moment she set aside all the strangeness of context and let that feeling fill in all the impossible cracks. That little voice whispered again, deep in the hollow of her ear: _Jacob is hurting._

Sucking in a quiet breath, Bella's hand dared the minutest of movement, just a subtle unclasping of her fingers. "Heyyy," she breathed.

That animalistic gaze darted up to her eyes.

"Jake, everything's okay," she murmured, slowly reaching that hand up toward the towering man before her.

A million micro-expressions were parading across this face, as his gaze stayed intently locked with hers. But as her hand continued its achingly slow stretch toward his face, every last tremor in his body went utterly still.

Pulling a nervous corner of her lip into her mouth, Bella closed the distance and brushed her fingers over his jutting cheekbone. Just a butterfly's caress.

He sucked in audible breath through his nose that jerked his pecs.

She repeated the touch her eyes slipping to her fingertips. And again, losing herself in the silken caramel of his skin. He felt so good - a warmth seeped through the pads of her fingers siphoning up her arm and inflating her heart.

"You're okay," she whispered quietly, her palm forming to the athletic lines of his face.

For a moment he was as still as stone, then, slowly, Jacob's cheek pressed into her hand, and her eyes darted back to his. They were rolling up under his lids as he nuzzled into her touch. It was a shocking display of vulnerability in contrast to all that power and poise and it stoked her fledgling confidence brighter.

_This_ was what he needed. _Her_.

Those heavy lids finally relented and closed while a soft susurration vibrated in her palm - warm and endearing like a purr of sorts.

Bella's lips curved gently. She tipped her head, watching him as he turned his nose into her palm and panted quietly. It was such a tender and intimate gesture that her heart felt like was overrunning the bounds of her chest.

It leaked out in a hitching exhale, "Jacob."

Those lids blinked open lazily, the pupils still rolling in his head. Slowly they steadied, finding her own immediately. The molten flame had cooled to obsidian black - the deep and fathomless midnight of his soul.

"Jake," she smiled. "You're back."

'

* * *

_'_

_Review if you like._


	6. Need

_Someday I will write a normal-length chapter. They keep getting longer and longer._

**Odd word:**_ emetic - a medicine that causes vomiting (like Syrup of Ipecac)_

_'_

_Mahalo nui to Tayjayfan for the preread, as always._

_And thanks to you for reading (and the notes) and I hope you enjoy._

'

'

* * *

**Chapter 6 - Need**

* * *

'

**"Silence (Delirium)" -Sarah McLaughlin  
**

Give me release  
witness me  
I am outside  
give me peace

Heaven holds a sense of wonder  
and I wanted to believe  
that I'd get caught up  
when the rage in me subsides

I can't help this longing  
comfort me  
I can't hold it all in  
if you won't let me

Heaven holds a sense of wonder...

In this white wave  
I am sinking  
in this silence  
in this white wave  
in this silence  
I believe

I have seen you  
in this white wave  
you are silent  
you are breathing  
in this white wave  
I am free

'

"You're okay."

That voice was like a lighthouse, whispering across a vast tossing ocean of anguish. He could barely hear the words over the eerily quiet roar of a tempestuous surf that pounded with each of his rapid heartbeats. Fire gurgled through his veins like magma, glubbing bubbles popping in his ears under fathoms of suffocation.

A touch as delicate as spun silk whispered over his skin like a promise.

Dry, tender, cool, it coaxed him up.

Up, up…

He turned into a touch that leeched solace through his veins like an antidote, quenching the molten heat that was incinerating him alive. Jacob clung to it while he frantically jerked shallow hummingbird breaths of that comforting sweetness into his burning lungs. His entire world had contracted to the grotto of her palm.

"Jacob?" that mesmerizing voice repeated his name - softer this time - and he achingly hauled himself up onto her solacing shores.

_Bella._

_What had he done?_

Fighting hundred pound lids, Jacob struggled to get his bearings, and found himself swallowed whole by huge, cinnamon eyes. Like he'd been broadsided by another tumbling wave of overwhelm, the breath was knocked from him again, leaving him with nothing but a cavernous awe.

She was beautiful.

_Mine,_ a voice whispered like rushing curl of surf upon the sand.

Dark chocolate lashes fluttered against creamy cheeks while raspberry lips curved with trembling pleasure. She was smiling….at _him_.

He tried to catch his breath… and failed miserably.

"Jake," Bella whispered, her warm loamy gaze tenderly caressing his face, pushing resuscitation into his skin. "You're back."

Jacob panted quietly, trying to clear drowned lungs. An impulsive hand slipped up to cover those delicate emancipating fingers caressing his cheek. His fingertips rested lightly over the range of her knuckles as his calloused thumb traced the soft giving veins that laced the back of her hand.

Her swallow crinkled in her throat. "Hey," she greeted in a breathy whisper.

Jacob jerked back like she'd burned him as human sentience finally broke the surface of instinct's tumultuous tide. He harshly sucked cutting consciousness into his lungs like an icy razor blade, free at last.

At the sudden, preternaturally fast movement Bella's body had gone rigid, her eyes widened in fright.

Jacob took two more steps back, his eyes blinking frantically. The last thing he truly remembered was seeing the fresh tracks from her truck in the mud outside his house. He should have felt the sands of sanity slipping out from under his feet when they were pulled by his wolf toward the little red house instead of being pushed to chase her down.

The harsh astringent cleaners had masked any telltale scent… until he'd opened the front door. The stale stuffiness of his house had been gutted by antiseptic cleaners, but in the middle of that barren landscape was a potent cocktail that hit his brain hard like he'd freebased it:

_Luscious cream and w__ildflower honey._

_Salty sorrow and a__crid fear._

_And blood._

She was hurt.

His eyes blinked back open to where Bella was still pressed back against the counter and found his gaze compulsively snap back down to the bandage on her arm that leached that addictive rusty scent. The adrenaline boiled his blood.

"Jacob?" that mesmerizing voice was the only lifeline from the depths of insanity.

"What happened?" he choked quietly, battling for the rationality to see an innocuous flesh-wound over the senseless protective rage that churned in his gut like hydrochloric acid.

"I, um…" she stammered, clapping an embarrassed hand over her arm as she took subtle side-step along the kitchen counter. "The usual," she whispered. She took another shimmying step.

But Jacob was now focused on something entirely different: she was slowly inching away.

From him.

That lingering caustic scent of stress and fear was somehow both narcotic and emetic at the same time and it made his wolf crazy. The subtle dark edges of fear that ringed her irises snapped his head back in the game and through a man's eyes, now it was painfully clear: there was no demon enemy that needed to be slain here - as the beast had somehow convinced him - Bella was afraid of an entirely different predator.

She was afraid of _him_.

As she should be.

Jacob swallowed thickly as the murky and muddled memory slipped vaguely through his fingers like trying to catch a dream on the edges of waking. He squeezed eyes shut briefly on the sheer horror of reality. This was _three times_ in _twenty-four hours_ that he'd lost his humanity to the beast.

And he was terrified.

But the wolf wouldn't let him show his abject humiliation and fear: never show weakness, especially to his mate. Accordingly he let that habitual taciturn mask take root in his features as he squared his jaw and shoulders.

"I should go," he murmured, turning his back on her and heading directly for the back door.

"Not yet!" Bella came back quickly. "Please don't."

And it was like those hasty words lassoed him, swaddling his body in persuasion. It was such an odd feeling that his feet froze in confusion. The man - with a leader's defiance - wanted to push against it, yet the wolf (who was usually the more rebellious of the two by far) wanted nothing but to trot back and curl itself at her feet.

"_Please_, Jake," she pled quietly. "I made lunch."

His back still to her, his eyes closed soundly and then blinked several time back open as he worked his jaw back and forth. Wracking his brain, he couldn't find a shred of will or desire to object.

_Think_. _Surely_ there was a reason… it was just on the tip of his tongue.

"I made your favorite cookies too," she added quietly, sounding encouraged by his hesitation. "Please?"

It was the tone of her words that tied the final compulsive bow: she _wanted_ him to stay. And it was like something snapped inside him - something painful that had been taut and strained far too long. He released a long slow breath over his lips as he turned around slowly, his confusion still furrowing his brow.

The impishness that always prefaced Bella's dorky humor flared to life in her eyes with triumph. "Mmm…they're gooood. Coookies…" she tempted theatrically as her hand inched along the counter with lingering wariness. Jacob didn't care that she was still nervous: it was entrancing… this lightness was utterly hypnotic.

His foot took a step toward her.

Bella pulled the large tupperware toward her. Her huge chestnut eyes locked on his, she popped the top slowly as if she were afraid of spooking him.

The smells of warm oatmeal and gooey chocolate massaged away the residual scents of stress.

_God that smelled good._

Bella turned around fully to face him, holding out a cookie like a peace offering and Jacob found his gaze devouring it whole. "I put extra chocolate chips in them," she ventured.

Jacob reflexively licked his lips and looked back into eyes that were blinking with insecurity.

"Thanks," he whispered quietly, measuring a careful step toward her and holding out his hand. Even though - at the moment - he was feeling an eerie sense of calm, his every muscle was consciously held taut with fear that any moment the wolf would snap its leash and spring forward again.

Bella pushed off the counter and closed the distance between them, placing the cookie in his hand. Their fingers brushed and it felt he'd stuck his finger in a socket.

Bella snatched her hand back with sharp intake of breath. Her gaze darted up from her fingers to rest in his eyes with silent questions.

Jacob ignored them. He brought the cookie to his mouth and stoically took a bite.

_Holy fuck._

Every shred of attention instantly snapped to the mouthful as his jaw slowed to savoring chews and his eyes automatically drifted closed in pure gastronomic bliss. This was, without a doubt, the best fucking cookie he'd ever tasted in his life.

"Is it good?" he could hear the smile in the words.

Embarrassed, Jacob's eyes popped back open to an expression of amused pleasure on Bella's face.

He nodded - a stiff jerking motion - and then stuffed the rest of the confection into his mouth.

Smothering a chuckle, Bella turned around and reached up to pull a plate from the cupboard. "You want some, Billy?" she called over her shoulder.

"Sure."

It was the first time Jacob realized his father was in the room. Jacob's chewing stuttered as he turned to see his father watching him with intense eyes. The man tipped his head in an imperceptible nod and Jacob's gaze fell to the floor. He arduously swallowed his mouthful in shame as the muddled scene moments ago flared behind his mind's eye.

The wolf jerked up to attention though as his mate padded toward the living room with plate and container in hand.

_His __mate__?_

Disconcerted, Jacob realized he'd been thinking of Bella in such terms ever since he'd first caught the whiff of her scent in her front yard. This curse was so fucking insidious.

Shaking his head brusquely, he looked up from under a furrowed brow, his body mechanically turning with her movement. It lit some prickling flame of anxiety in his chest to see her walk away from him and stoked a burning compulsion to follow after.

His lips flashing up from his canines in frustration, Jacob pulled his hands behind his hips and caged them firmly against the counter.

"Here you go," Bella was saying a little too cheerily as she offered the tupperware to her father along with a plate. "Why don't you see if the Mariners are doing any better," she suggested with a meaningful tautness in her voice.

"Thanks Bella," Billy replied, tearing his eyes away from his son and forcing a wan smile for her benefit. "Hopefully they pulled Delabar out - he was pitchin' like a grandma."

Bella laughed hollowly. It was an awkward scene that was staged solely for his benefit.

Jacob squeezed his eyes closed as the television blared to buoyant life. _God, he was so fucked up._

The sound of her lulling footstep and the that spellbinding scent of honey and cream made his eyes pop back open.

"Want another?" she murmured, approaching him hesitantly and looking up at him from under her lush fringe of lashes.

In a nanosecond flat, he went from painfully abashed to painfully aroused.

_Peaches and cream skin, dark endless eyes, full ripened lips._

Jacob pressed his hands back against the counter harder.

Bella tipped her head, pulling her lower lip into her mouth nervously. "Um… here you go," she exhaled the words on a breath and pushed the container into his chest.

With lupine reflexes, he had it snatched in his hands.

Her lip popped out from her teeth as she tottered back, blinking rapidly at the sudden movement.

"Thanks," he rasped quickly, trying his best to soothe her.

She rubbed her palms on her shorts with a little nod. Shrugging her shoulders up to her ears, she turned toward the sink.

"So, um… about another half an hour and the lasagna will be done," she chirped, forcing enthusiasm.

Jacob leaned back against the counter and watched her as he absently reached in and grabbed another cookie. His cagey attention followed each minute movement as she turned on the water to wash the couple of dishes left in the sink.

In one morning, she'd transformed this old house into something that felt much more like his home of days gone by. That God-awful Pine-Sol burned his nose, but over that, her scent saturated the air and made every muscle in his body strain to relax.

Jacob fought it with everything he had. It was just what his wolf wanted: to let his guard down.

Idly he opened his mouth and popped the entire cookie into it and a reflexive groan escaped his lips before he could stop it.

Bella peeked over her shoulder and her lips curved in a private smile.

_It was sexy as hell._

And so was this fucking cookie. Maybe she had added some crack along with the extra chocolate chips? Suddenly Jacob understood a little more about how Sam ravenously devoured even the most desecrated recipe if it was Emily's. There was something very primal that was fed by an imprint's hand and Jacob was a lucky bastard that Bella was actually a fucking professional in the kitchen.

Jacob sniffed an accidental laugh at the thought.

Bella glanced again over her shoulder with a glorious smile. "What?" she grinned as she grabbed a towel and dried her hands.

Jacob quickly rearranged his face. "Nothing," mumbled through a full mouth.

"That's the first almost-kinda-smile I've seen on your face, Jacob Black," she taunted gently, leaning her hip against the sink. "And you're not gonna share?"

_He'd been smiling?_

Jacob swallowed his mouthful and considered her a moment. "Nope. My cookies," he quipped and dug out another with a defiant lift of his brow.

Bella giggled. It was a bright effervescent sound that made every cell in his body tingle. His lips twitched as he unceremoniously shoved another cookie over them.

Bella held his gaze, watching him eat for a moment with a smile and then went back to puttering, humming a nervous off-pitch tune under her breath. A soft blush ripened her cheeks when she glanced nervously over her shoulder and found him watching her.

_Because oh, was he watching._

For the first time in as long as he could remember the animal had settled in his gut right alongside the man, utterly captivated. Even nervous and unsure as she was, watching her was hypnotic: the feminine arcs of her movements… the bob of her ponytail with each step… the smooth sinewy muscles in those long shapely legs. Jacob's ravenous eyes clung to her petite body as she wiped down the water from the counter and put away some dishes from the drain while he devoured cookie after cookie as if they could fill that yearning space inside of him. Her seductive scent, the sound of her heart, the sough of her breath, the sway of her hips lulled him into a narcotic illusion…that everything could somehow be okay.

And that was a very dangerous thing.

Because there were still demons and broken Packmates and new wolves and a ruthless and uncontrollable part of his soul that could rise up at any moment and lay waste to it all.

Anything else was nothing more than an imprint-induced hallucination.

Jacob snapped out of his reverie at the sight of Bella going up on her little painted tiptoes, angling his box of bandages for the top shelf of the cabinet, trying to put them way. Like in the garage when she'd fallen, in a thoughtless instant instinct and man unified and he was behind her in a heartbeat, his large hands covering her own. Just the brush of her petal skin set his every neuron on fire - he wondered if it did that for her too or if it was the silent surprise that made her gasp, jerking back into his chest.

"Shh," he soothed as he gently lifted the box from her hands, looking down at the top her head as he fought the instinct to wrap his arms around that little body and keep it there. She seemed _so_ _small_ now.

"Sorry," she mumbled, and, head tucked, she was hastily turning out from under his arms. He watched as she backed up against the counter, her lip turning white from her teeth's abuse as she wrapped awkward arms around her middle. His wolf didn't like to see her so uncomfortable and neither did Jacob.

"Shrimp," he murmured, trying his hand at light as he easily replaced the bandages on the shelf.

Bella looked up and he offered her a wry smile.

She lifted her chin. "Wolf," she bit back curtly.

Jacob couldn't help that his every muscle froze as the animal rose gleefully at her acknowledgement. He'd known she suspected, and hell, after his little performance minutes ago she'd be stupid not to suspect _something_ (and she certainly wasn't). So he'd _known_. But to hear her say it was somehow… freeing and frightening at the same time.

His face had betrayed nothing. This he knew too, because her eyes were raking over it looking for some kind of confirmation and growing more frustrated by the second.

Jacob let his lips hitch up in smirk as he arched a sarcastic brow. "Whachu been smokin', Bells?"

"Gah!" With a disgusted roll to her eyes, she pushed off the counter and stamped into the living room, her feet making hollow sounds on the old wood.

The frustration in her jerking movements drew him like a moth to a flame. Before he even knew what he was doing he was stalking after her, his wolf salivating at the challenge.

She gruffly snatched the laundry basket off the floor and whipped around, taking a startled step back when he was silently right behind her. Her head snapping up, the surprise quickly darkened back into a glower.

Jacob gave her a saccharine smile and reached out for the basket. Narrowing her eyes, she shoved it into his stomach and stomped past him toward the hall with a toss of her head. His wolf was enthralled by the push-pull of this game of chase and he turned lithely on his heel, a soft anticipant rumble leaking from his chest.

Bella glanced worriedly over her shoulder and Jacob caught her gaze in a hypnotic stare. She ripped her eyes away as she stumbled, catching herself against the wall and effectively wiping the poise clear off his face. Bella gathered herself together with a huff and pounded again down the hall.

"Jacob…" his father's voice rose in warning under the incidental soundtrack of the television.

Jacob ignored him, prowling after the woman who had stopped in the hallway between the kitchen and bathroom and yanked a linen closet door open with enough gusto that it banged against the wall.

Hands on her hips, Bella was scowling at the shelving and studiously ignoring his liquid slink to her side. As his eyes greedily guzzled down her sulking annoyance, he stopped beside her - holding the basket out solicitously. It was as sick as the rest of this shit, but her piqued indignation was totally turning him on.

Without even looking at him, her hands dove into the basket and pulled out a stack of towels, shoving them petulantly on the shelf. With a frustrated sigh - that considerably undermined her ire - she reached back in and straightened the crumpled terrycloth neatly on the shelf.

Jacob chuckled. Bella had always been a little OCD.

Her narrowed gaze snapped up to him and she pursed her lips threateningly. "You think this is funny?" she challenged hotly.

Raising an infuriating brow, Jacob leaned a cavalier shoulder against the wall. "Whatta _you_ think?" he crooned, his gaze slipping ravenously over the fury in her face and wishing it was his tongue.

Bella's lips popped open in seductive outrage and it drew his eyes down to their slick silky shape. _Deliciously mismatched and made for kissing._

Fuck, he needed to get himself under control.

Bella must have sensed the change in energy too, because she immediately tucked her head and pulled out a pile of pillow cases without another word. Battling his arousal like a dragon from the deep, Jacob shifted his body against the wall, holding the basket a little lower as a shield. Hell his body had been at attentive ready since he'd walked through his front door - thank God for jeans and distractions (and laundry baskets).

As she thrust her hands into the basket for the last pile of sheets, her gaze snagged on the cut lines his chest. It did nothing to help Jacob's current dilemma; his wolf suddenly jerked up to fervid attention. Jacob found himself compelled to straighten, tensing his pecs and abdomen and pulling his shoulder's taut in a very primal display of virility. He _needed_ her to approve.

At the subtle movements, Bella's gaze darted up to his eyes, looking like a child who'd gotten caught being naughty and a blush deepened the flush of her cheeks. Her scent sweetened with arousal as she jerked her gaze away in chagrin, stuffing the sheets onto the remaining shelf with unsteady hands. His wolf veritably purred, pleased.

Jacob was disconcerted.

"Is this part of that transformation too?" she rasped, making an attempt to harden her voice in annoyance while she neurotically straightened the sheets.

The words were like ice water tossed over his head; was she already asking about the imprint? His mouth went dry.

Bella finished with the sheets and then slammed the cupboard door closed with a thump, looking up at him with exasperation. "Because I don't remember _anything_ in those old stories about _warriors_," she emphasized the word with sarcasm. "..turning into _two_ animals." Her hands came to her hips as she arched a disparaging brow.

Jacob blinked - both her tone and words were confusing.

"And you're _definitely_ a jackass right now," she frowned.

A deep appreciative laugh billowed from the peanut gallery in the living room and Jacob rolled his eyes. But the unexpected humor was exactly the lifering he needed to pull himself up to safer shores.

"Ha. Ha," he muttered blandly.

Bella gave him a saccharine grin and promptly yanked the basket from his hands. Or tried to; it didn't so much as budge in his casual grip.

She made a frustrated noise in the back of her throat. "I'll bet you have some laundry holed up in that messy room of yours and I've got time for one more load," she informed him pertly. "Wanna make use of it?"

Jacob released the basket to her insistent grip.

Bella raised her brow questioningly and Jacob dipped his chin in assent. Without another word, she turned on her heel and padded down the hall.

"Jacob?" his father called from the living room. "Can I get a minute?"

Jacob blinked as Bella paused with her hand on his bedroom door, glancing back at him. She jerked her chin meaningfully toward the front of the house and then pushed into his room. Jacob watched her disappear and then turned reluctantly around.

He trudged the few paces back into the living area and was greeted with his father's grin.

Jacob wrinkled his nose with lupine displeasure and the old man dutifully wiped the amusement from his face.

"She knows, son," he announced simply.

Jacob's eyes flicked up to the ceiling. He wondered how dense his father thought he was. He started to turn back toward his bedroom.

"I told her," he continued quietly.

Jacob jerked back around with a scowl, his lips flashing up from his canines.

His father cocked a disapproving brow and Jacob slapped his palms over his face, rubbing briskly and only marginally succeeding in submerging his temper. The lupine hormonal punch was already a daily disaster, but ever since he'd imprinted he felt like he was getting tossed around by some violent emotional roller coaster. Without seatbelts.

"She already knew, Jake," his father continued quietly, wheeling his chair a few feet closer while simultaneously raising the volume on the television - for Bella he supposed. He could have heard his father's whisper from down the street. "She asked me if our legends were true and I told her they were… in a roundabout way."

Jacob let his hands fall back to his thighs with sharp exhale. He met his father's sly eyes. "I knew you had some scheme up your sleeve, old man," Jacob grumbled with a flare of his nostrils.

Billy's unapologetic grin didn't bother to try and hide effective confirmation. "I just wanted to see how she was doin', Jake. Maybe get her scent around here a little and see if that didn't calm you down. She took care of the rest," he murmured, cocking his head as his hands patted the armrests. "So she knows the basics. And that you're Alpha."

His chest felt like an MMA match: competing emotions were painfully battling inside the cage of his heart - anger, fear, shame, relief and - most lethal of all - _hope_. As usual, Jacob went with most accessible emotion these days: anger.

"You had no right," he bit out, taking a step toward his father as his hands curled into fists.

His father, however, didn't back down. In fact, he wheeled himself closer staring Jacob down with hard eyes. "Since when was this all about _you_, boy?" he hissed disparagingly.

Jacob's brow furrowed, as his pulse jumped into a jackhammer sprint at the challenge. He dragged a harsh breath through a nose that wrinkled with ire.

"It _ain't_ just about you," Billy continued on, unfazed, leaning forward intently. "She's the Alpha's imprint and until you figure out what that means she' got herself her own can a' worms. And if the Alpha's to busy stickin' his head up his ass to see what he needs - what his Pack, his _tribe_ needs - then maybe we oughta see if she can yank it out for him."

Jacob snarled - it was a juicy, gravelly sound.

"Yeah, you ole' wolf," Billy rolled his eyes, backing his wheelchair away subtly anyway. "You shoulda seen yourself - come stormin' in here like the devil, eyes a-blazin' and spittin' nails. Enough to give an ole' man a heart attack…" his face went sober. "Think on what it was like for lil' Bella."

Jacob let out a long measured breath through his gritted teeth. "She doesn't deserve this," he hissed.

Shadows gathered in the lines of his father's dusky face. "She deserves a _choice_, Jacob," he pressed intensely.

Squeezing his eyes shut as he swiped a hand over his face, Jacob took a heavy step back. His wolf was carving his agreement into his gut while Jacob's head and heart was reeling with a sickening vertigo.

"You were born into this thing, son," Billy continued quietly, an air of condolence hollowing the words. "Bella was _chosen_," he whispered.

Jacob looked up and met his father's gaze from under a furrowed brow.

"She don't have our blood, Jake… this ain't about the tribe, it's about you," he ventured in a whisper, his eyes darting intensely between Jacob's own. "You mighta lost your faith Jake, but I ain't lost mine yet."

If Jacob had had any presence of mind he might have realized that it was fear and hopelessness that fueled the irrational anger that charged through his veins at such words. But he just felt that fire ignite his combustible heart.

He slapped his hands to his thighs as his nose wrinkled with a sneer. "Even after mom?" he spat, watching the razor words slice through that impassive façade. Billy's eyes squeezed closed as his head bowed under the weight of a pain that still hadn't healed over all these years.

Shame slammed into Jacob like a mack truck and he abruptly turned his back on his father and regret. "I _can't_ lose Bella too," he whispered - the closest thing to an apology he could muster - and stalked toward the hall.

Jacob swallowed thickly as he paced toward his bedroom, trying to square his massive shoulders - that nearly filled the hallway - under all that weighed them down. All while his wolf senselessly mauled away at his insides, flailing against the man's desperate shackle.

But no matter how hard Jacob fought at a steeling restraint, his entire being imploded at the sight of the girl he loved sitting in his bedroom. His feet simply froze in the doorway, his mutinous body snipping their tether to his brain.

Her back to the door, she was sitting on the floor beside his mattress - Jacob had thrown out the frame and box springs last year - on her knees with her legs splayed out on either side like a little kid. Her head was bowed, showing the delicate bones that ranged down under the neck of her shirt (his shirt) while her hands rhythmically smoothed over something in her lap. She looked small and fragile, sitting like a little piece of dappled innocence in the murky maelstrom that was his room. Shorts and a few shirts were thrown all around her along with wrappers and dirty dishware and general chaos: the negligent landscape of despair.

Jacob crossed his arms firmly over his chest and leaned against the doorway. Seeing her in such close proximity to his bed was a very dangerous thing. He clenched his eyes closed against the sight but inadvertently opened them to even more perilous territory. Scent was such a powerful thing - even more so to a wolf. Just her delectable pheromones, mixed with his own that saturated his room, was a narcotic that fueled an instantly vivid visceral fantasy:

_Her breath, shallow and rapid. The feel of her petite body dwarfed in his arms._

_The soft fluttering pop of cloth. The taste of lush buttery skin tightening into chilbumps. His tongue would read them like Braille: desire._

_Her desire was a knife that effortlessly excised his heart and severed steely restraint. She'd bloom under his touch, unfurling, opening. Parted welcoming thighs and covetous embraces begging him to press himself deep into the warmth of her body. He'd suckle slick candy lips and swallow her sighs like jujubees thrusting into the prickling demand tattooed into his back by her fervent nails. With his body, with his want, he'd carve his name indelibly into her soul. Incarcerate her in his sheltering arms, safeguard her in the tender marrow of his heart, cherish her so deeply in his being that neither man nor gods nor the winds of fate and time could possibly deny:_

"_Mine_." The word was an audible hiss snagged on gritted teeth and Jacob clamped his lips over it just a little too late.

"Jake?"

Jacob's eyes popped open to Bella, her body twisting around on the floor to stare up at him with both surprise and concern widening her eyes. Nostrils flaring, he carefully rearranged his face back into his stoic mask and pressed himself more firmly into the door jamb.

A pucker bunched between her brows as her gaze flitted down his body, assessing. It suddenly fell to the ground as a blush rushed to her cheeks. Jacob blinked in confusion… for a millisecond.

_Oh shit._

His eyes flicking up to the ceiling in chagrin, he released a long slow breath as he slipped stiffly down doorframe. He sat down sideways in the doorway, his feet resting against the opposite jamb so his bent leg hid the humiliating evidence of his arousal. His body was locked and loaded with magnificent aplomb that even jeans couldn't camouflage.

Bella glanced nervously over at him as she inched her legs around a little so she was half facing him. Now he could see what was on her lap: their picture. The one she'd given him last summer of the two of them sitting on her porch. He'd bent it in half and replaced it in the frame, hiding the blasphemous evidence of the boy he'd once been.

Biting her lip, Bella hunched her shoulders uncomfortably and began replacing the photo in the frame.

Propping his elbows on his bent knees, Jacob shoved his hands through his hair with a huffing breath. An awkward silence seeped up between the needles of rain against the window pane that hemmed the fleecy muddled TV from the living room. Silence never used to be awkward with Bella.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here," Bella whispered.

Jacob's forearm fell down limply over one knee as he glanced at her. Her shaking fingers were pressing the backing into the frame.

Bella looked up from under her lashes. "Your dad said it hurt," she said quietly.

Jacob sniffed an acidic laugh. That was the fucking understatement of the century. A little over a month before he phased, the ache started in his bones - growing pains that quickly became so painful they were debilitating. Two weeks prior to the change the fever set in as his body struggled to fulfill the unnatural demands for growth. By that time, he was reduced to an inert moaning heap of agony on his ridiculously inadequate bed, the mattress thumping rhythmically against the wall with his tremors. The physical torture was slowly replaced by a nefarious rage that bled crimson into every word, action and reaction until, _finally_, he'd exploded.

It was then he'd realized he hadn't known the _first thing_ about pain.

Bella licked her lips. "Did you know what was happening before you-…" her words stalled on her lips.

A bitter smirk hitch up the side of his mouth. "Nope. Can't," he bit out.

Bella blinked, absently pulling the picture to her chest. "Why not?" she asked.

"Because," Jacob stretched the word out on a sigh as he pressed both palms into the floor and rearranged his huge body in the doorway. His muscles were twitchy just thinking about all this shit. "If we resist it that first time, there's a chance we could stuck."

Bella's brow dipped in confusion.

Jacob's head fell back to the door frame with a soft thud. "The first time, you have to get really mad - and if there's any fear jumbled up with it, it could… well it might not work right. There's stories," he told her vaguely. Stories where men died in that first phase.

Bella tipped her head. "So you got really mad and … _poof_?" her brows shot up.

Jacob's smirk evened out. It was such an innocent and endearing version of the actual process of bones breaking over and over while flesh knotted and tore that he decided not to burst her bubble.

"More like a _crack_, but yeah," he chuckled humorlessly.

Bella's brow furrowed as she studied his face carefully and then she dropped her eyes back to her lap. "Liar," she whispered as she brought the picture back down and stared at it.

Jacob shoved his lower lip through his teeth. She'd always been able to read him like a fucking book. He swallowed thickly, watching her finger trace idly across the glass while her dark lashes fluttered over hidden thoughts.

"They told me I couldn't see you," he whispered - an apology, a confession, a plea.

Bella had heard all three - she looked up slowly with aching liquid eyes that were opened clear down to her sensitive heart.

"That's what made me Phase," he clarified softly, trying to pull himself back up to the steady footing of conversation from the seductive solace of her soul.

Bella nodded minutely, her eyes pacing intensely between his. "Only part of you changed Jacob," she murmured, her hands reflexively gripping the picture in her hands as if she could make it true.

Closing his eyes, he shook his head numbly in defeat on its way to flop forward. "You don't know, Bella," he breathed to his lap.

"_Yes_ I do!" she bit back passionately.

He jerked his head up as bitterness hardened his face into a disparaging smirk. "You don't know _shit_," he spat.

Bella's eyes narrowed has her shoulders pulled back with temper. "Go to hell Jacob Black," she snapped.

"Already there," he quipped with a biting grin.

"Yeah? Well guess what?" she challenged, those chestnut eyes flashing, as she stumbled to her feet. "I'm coming on down to get you and haul your sorry butt back out!"

His wolf liked this - their mate was strong. Jacob quickly shoved that shit back down.

"I don't _care_ if you grew a gazillion pounds of muscle and turn into a giant dog…this!" She thrust the picture out toward him. "_This_ is who you are: an awesome guy with the biggest heart I know... who's my _best friend_!"

"Don't you fucking get it?" he snarled, pushing off the floor in one fluid lightning leap. "I'm trying to protect you!"

Bella had shrunk away from the speed and his hulking size that filled the entire doorway, but she quickly recovered and stomped a step toward him, fearlessly facing him down in spite of the fact that the photo in her hand was trembling.

"From _who_, Jacob?" she bit out with a defiant lift to her chin.

"From _me_." Those two hissed words burned his lips like acid.

Bella rolled her lips together as her unreadable gaze silently cataloged his face.

Jacob huffed out a hash breath. Why was he even here? This insidious curse along with his father's collusion (Bella's wily little ways only marginally better) had somehow seduced him into actually discussing this with her.

And he needed to remedy that error right this minute…

"Damn it Bella! We can't-…"

"You'd never hurt me, Jacob," she hissed, with such quiet power behind the it that Jacob froze mid-word. There was not a trace of manipulation or bravado or speculation hanging on for the ride in that statement.

"Bella -…"

"No," she quickly cut him off. "I may not have a clue about the rest of this crap, but I _know_ that." Her hands found her hips in that habitual way of hers that she'd had as long as he could remember.

"How?" the word jettisoned out of his mouth without a single thought behind it.

"Here," she rasped passionately as her hand flew up and clutched over her heart. "I don't know _how_ I know it, but I _do_. And you know what else I know?" She didn't wait for him to answer but took a tentative step toward him. "I still need you, Jake."

He wanted to disagree, to tell she was crazy… but neither wolf nor man could deny: he needed her too.

That didn't mean he wouldn't try though. "Bella…" her name slipped out on a tired sigh as he collapsed against the door frame.

"Please?" she asked quietly, pulling the picture to her chest and taking another step forward. "Please Jake? I won't ask you any questions…. we don't have to hang out like we used to or anything… I can pretend I don't know any of it - heck, I'm not supposed to know anyways, right?" her gaze was desperate and pleading.

Jacob closed his eyes tiredly as he released a long hollow breath.

"Just _please_ don't ask me to stop being your friend, Jake."

The words reverberated strangely deep in his bones with a tinny tingle, and his eyes popped back open to her vulnerable and beseeching stare. All that was left of his heart shattered into a million tiny pieces.

He sucked in a long slow breath. "Bella," his lips cherished the word. "I don't-"

"You don't have to know anything, kay?" she interrupted him brusquely. Usually, if she was anything, she was a patient and attentive listener. But not today.

"We'll just figure it out as we go along, huh Jake?" she forced a smile and it was nothing short of pitiful. "We'll just…" she tore her desperate eyes away from him and panned the room. "First I'll help you clean up this mess and then we'll have lunch."

Jacob rubbed his hands roughly over his face, trying to ignore the tremor in them. He felt literally torn apart at the seams. Seeing - and _scenting_ - Bella's desperation evoked a physical pain that locked deep in his muscles and burned through his veins. He pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes and drew in a hissing breath between his teeth before he again slipped his arms down to cross over his chest. His steely eyes immediately locked back on Bella like she was some kind of freaky electro magnet.

She'd carefully replaced the restored picture beside his bed, having swept the detritus out of the way, and now was stooping to gather another pair of shorts up in the pile of clothes in her arms. Her shoulders were bowed and she was biting her lip to hell as she shuffled around the room collecting dirty laundry. The man in him wanted to step in and help her (but was also smart enough not to trust himself so close in his room) but the wolf got some kind of perverse tingling pleasure out of seeing her solicitously caring for him.

This whole fucking thing was totally sick.

Jacob leaned his temple against the doorframe and chewed on the inside of his cheek. Like some high performance vehicle on a closed circuit track, his thoughts were doing doughnuts and leaving a smoking black film behind his eyes. But the crazy thing was, as his eyes impulsively followed her, her unique brand of grace insidiously began lulling him into calm. Bella had always be a hopeless clutz, but there was authenticity to her movements. She was wholly in the world - not observing it from outside herself - and it showed in the grounded, if not clumsy, way she interacted with it.

He found his thoughts evaporating like smoke from hot pavement until nothing was left but the sound of the rain, his father in the living room and the even hypnotic beat of her heart keeping time to the caress of her breath.

She kept glancing warily at him out of the corner of her eye as she piled shorts, a few shirts (thankfully no underwear, he never wore it) and some rogue towels on the mattress. She then pulled off the pillow case and dropped it in the center, and bent over…

Jacob felt like he'd been tasered - by an elephant prod. His entire body tensed and jerked in resonance like he'd grounded a lightning strike.

Bella was a flexible girl, so when she bent over to collect the sheets around her bundle of laundry, she did so at the waist. Giving him a perfect view of her pert, round ass.

His wolf went berserk.

Jacob frantically clenched his eyes shut against the overwhelming impulse to cross that room. But lurid and unwelcomed fantasy continued to play playing behind his shuttered eyes. It sickened him, but he simply couldn't help himself. All these months of stalwart and impeccable restraint and control simply evaporated like dew in the fires of this craving.

"Um." Bella cleared her throat sounding far too close.

Jacob squeezed his eyes tighter as he frantically wrestled restraints on raging instinct.

"Jake," she finally whispered.

He cracked open one eye - she was standing a few feet away, her cheeks stained red and her head tipped all the way up, eyes focused pointedly on his face. He didn't want to know what parts of his body looked like right now, and, apparently neither did she.

"Excuse me?" she asked quietly, with a raise to her brow.

With a groan, Jacob spun on his heel, forcing his wayward body away from her as he slapped his palms on his cheeks. Bella shuffled quietly by.

Of course his wolf demanded he follow her, and so - like he was tethered by a steel cable - before he knew what he was doing he was prowling right behind her down the dark confines of the hall. With a subtle glance over her shoulder, Bella walked a little more quickly toward the back door, the sharp tang of anxiety rising from her flesh and making his heart sprint ahead of them.

His long arm pushed the screen ahead of her and held it open as he braced his hand against the wall, desperately trying to halt his momentum.

With a muttered "thanks," Bella tottered awkwardly down the stairs, craning around the bundle of clothes to see her feet.

Jacob kept himself wedged inside the doorway - it took every ounce of strength he had. He took deep gulping breaths of the cool and rainy outside air, viscerally sighing with relief as that narcotic fog dissipated enough that he could actually think.

At the sound of water charging into metal, he opened his eyes and saw Bella leaning against the washing machine, her hands frozen on the closed lid, her head bowed. A soft sniffle instantly stopped his heart and started his feet, and he was silently descending down the rickety wooden stairs.

He idly swept a wayward pair of shorts off the ground as he passed and slowly approached her. Bella didn't look up but just tucked her head further, her lip being pulled nervously into her mouth. Below the scent of stress, her sadness was sopping and heavy like the mists that hung among the dark forest tree trunks behind them.

Jacob hated himself that he did this to her. It wasn't supposed to be like this.

Stepping up behind her, slowly, he reached around and pulled up the washing machine door open with one hand as her fingers slipped lethargically off the machine. His other arm slipped around her other side and pushed the shorts into rushing water.

Quietly, he closed the lid, but he couldn't seem to move his arms from around her body. His hands fell down to grip each edge of the machine, and for several moments he just stared down at her, his breath measuring slowly in and out of his lungs. She was so small now she was easily caged between arms that looked massive in comparison and it awoke a fierce and protective instinct deep in his gut. His wolf settled happily down with approval, it was a warm and sensual feeling that escaped in cashmere purr.

In that moment, her own realization dawned on him like a cloudless winter sunrise, snapping and brisk and sparkling across the icy barren landscape of his fear: he would _never_ hurt her.

A shudder rippled down her body and Bella's head ventured up, the hairs of her ponytail brushing across the skin of his chest and sending shimmering sparks over his skin.

Like a dream, he languidly bent down closer, his eyes taking in every minute detail: the little hairs that escaped her ponytail and curled with sweat, the freckle under her ear, the way her pulse hopscotched up the side of her neck. Her scent drew him in, but even more poignantly alluring, was the way it was mixed now with his own. As earthily mundane as carrying his laundry had been, it had left his scent over her skin and it was _this_ that was such a heady opiate for his wolf. For the first time the animal had stopped its rabid scrabbling inside and was content with _this_.

Just this: his hands securely braced on either side of her petite little body, his face inches from the side of her head.

Jacob leaned in further, releasing a soft breath over her temple as he gently bumped his jaw against her head.

Bella released the most delectable hitching sigh as she innately complied with a request he hadn't yet consciously realized as she tipped her head to the side.

He dug his fingers into the grounding metal as his eyes snapped down to the bared silken column of her neck and his lips turned into her mahogany hair. His eyes closed softly as he ghosted his mouth over the satin waves, relishing the way the hairs clung to his moist lips and drawing in her ambrosial scent mixed with her strawberry shampoo. His breath was rapid and shallow as his touched his lips to the fragile shell of her ear.

Bella gasped quietly as she instinctively arched back toward his body. His nose found the trench behind her ear and he traced the tip down to the delicate hollow where that exquisite fragrance was sweet and ripe. Pressing his face to her head, he panted in this haven, suckling that scent over his tongue.

And for just the briefest of moments - as profound as an eternity - Jacob felt at peace.

Bella hummed quietly, a soft sound of pleasure and it fluttered over his body like a breeze. "Bells," he infused the word into her skin - at once both worship and a prayer.

"Jake," she replied, her voice ethereal, dreamy. "What do you need?"

Jacob sucked in a soft breath, as his eyes popped open at such a question. Had anyone ever asked him this since he'd phased?

Pulling back from her mere millimeters, he licked his lips and the sound crinkled in the hypnotic intensity between them.

"Tell me," she breathed, just a sough in the back of her throat.

Jacob's lips dragged across the matte petal softness down her pulse. "This…" he murmured, the words falling over her skin in his lips' wake. "Just this."

He found the apex of neck and shoulder and pressed the bridge of his nose into that sanctuary and melted against her like an exhausted child.

And he breathed.

For minutes or hours - he couldn't be sure - he did nothing but breathe. Sequestered for just a moment in that ephemeral space she had gifted where no duty or guilt or instinct or trauma dared show its face.

Her hands slipped tenderly over his tense knuckles - his grip upon grounding sanity, tense and fierce- and she leaned back into him, embracing his entire being with her acceptance while Jacob greedily lapped up every last drop of respite like a starving man.

He wished he could stay here forever.

He might have been tempted to try, but for the sound of a rebuilt 1963 Chevy pulling into the front of the house. Throughout this muddled mess, the strategic part of his brain - that silently soldiered on regardless of the rest of him - had realized that her father must have brought her here and would, at some point, return.

Like a rubber band, reality snapped back like a slap, making him bolt up to instant nervy attention. Bella's body stiffened correspondingly, her hands clawing with instant anxiety over his.

"Your dad," he murmured by way of explanation, as he quickly slipped his hands out from under hers and took a brisk step back. He shoved both hands through his hair as he desperately scrabbled to pick up a million disparate pieces of himself, while that cagey attention focused like a laser beam on the sound of her father opening the truck door and stepping to the ground.

Swallowing thickly he looked down at Bella. She was turned sideways with a furrow to her brow, leaning her hip against the washer as a finger traced over the deep indents in the metal corners that were the shape his hand.

She looked up at him with huge saucer eyes. "Holy crap," she whispered.

But both Jacob and the wolf were now congealing around an oddly rejuvenated core, and that sedate inscrutable mask was back in place. It bothered her - he could tell - and she blinked with a frown, turning fully around as the washer lunged into its chugging cycle.

"Hey," she complained lightly. "Where'd you go?"

"You're dad's here and I should leave, Bella," he replied calmly. Truthfully he felt more solid than he had for a while, but he had no illusions about how a confining house with a protective father and his… his _mate_ would pull that rug briskly out from under his feet.

Bella worried her lip and pushed off the pulsing washer, taking several steps until she was a foot from where he stood.

"C'mon, Jake," she pled, her head tipping back with soft beseeching eyes. She reached her hand up to his face and instinct snatched it from the air with gentle fingers.

Still she stiffened in surprise.

Jacob smiled sadly at the fear that still lurked under the surface and had contracted her pupils and whipped her heart into a canter.

"You can't touch me, Bells," he murmured, bringing her fingers to his lips and pressing them to the tips in a relishing apology before setting them free.

Her hand stayed frozen in the air where he'd released them. "Why?" she asked quietly.

"Because," he breathed. "It's too -…"

His words died on his tongue at the bewitching sight of her hand slowly floating back to her own lips, thoughtlessly ferrying his kiss to her mouth.

Something in him snapped: it wasn't an earthshaking explosion or a sonic boom, but a subtle tiny pop, far too close to the sound sanity's inseam.

Which made it all the more terrifying.

The rain, the washer, the truck disappeared in an instant, Jacob's entire world contracting to those dark eyes staring back over her fingers resting at her mouth. Eyes locked intensely with hers, he took one step forward - Bella backing up correspondingly - and then another, a sickening momentum pulling him forward like the march of time.

Bella sucked in a sharp breath as his hands wrapped around her waist, his fingers touching at her spine, and lifted her up on the tossing washer like she weighed nothing. With barely a consideration his hand flicked the dial into silence as he stepped between her knees.

Bella was looking up at him with eyes that were wide but already swimming with the same potent cocktail that was charging through his veins. He brushed his hands over either side of her jaw as his fingers rested at the warm intimate nape of her neck.

Her lips were parted in an enticing raspberry petition that called him like a siren. Jacob leaned down closer on his way to sample her mouth.

His lips hovered over hers.

"Need."

The word slipped out on his breath, his ears catching it for his anesthetized brain and sending it reeling.

Bella sucked in a hitching inhale that whimpered in her throat and drew his breath across the distance between them.

"Bella, we need to leave. Now." The words were harshly clipped by a deep piqued voice.

The scent and sound of a male interfering, when he was centimeters away from taking what was his, made his wolf lunge into a infuriated frenzy. Jacob spun on his heel, an unequivocal snarl ripping from his chest that had Charlie blanching and stumbling back in the doorway.

"Jake stop!" Bella squeaked, the sound piercing his feral haze like a laser and instantly freezing his threatening stalk.

Charlie had recovered quickly, pushing the screen open with a violent bang, the fiercest scowl he'd ever seen twisting a face that had gone from white to beet red in a heartbeat. Without a question, if he'd been armed, Jacob would have already been shot.

The potent scent of the man's spiking testosterone and adrenaline billowed across the short distance and Jacob's lips flashed up from his teeth. He took another step, so he was standing fully between that threat and his mate.

The sound of Bella's feet hitting the ground along with her distressed gasp had Jacob whipping around in just enough time to catch her stumble with preternatural reflexes. He steadied her on her feet with his hands on her hips and then slowly let them fall back to his sides.

"Thanks," she whispered. "Dad, I'll be in in a minute," she raised her voice, keeping her wide and disoriented eyes locked with his.

"Bells, the station called - I gotta go in," he informed them, his voice still terse. "And we gotta leave. Now."

Jacob glanced over his shoulder, and found Charlie hesitating, his foot already on the first step.

"Please, dad," she called, peering around Jacob's broad shoulders.

Frowning, Charlie stepped back into the house, letting the door clatter shut. He stood stubbornly right behind it, scowling threats into Jacob's eyes from behind the screen.

Bella huffed in frustration and Jacob turned back around to her rolling eyes. "Sorry," she murmured. "You okay?"

Jacob nodded once - far more confidently than he felt.

"Why don't you stay out here for a minute," she squinted apologetically, having come to the same conclusion as Jacob had about the potential for disaster. Her gaze darted between his eyes and she licked her lips. "Will you call me?" her voice was breathy, unsure.

The problem was, so was Jacob. "Eventually," he capitulated.

Bella blinked as her gaze fell between them. She nodded limply and then drew in a sharp breath. "Kay," she huffed briskly, patting her hands on hips.

Jacob stood aside and watched as she pulled her lip into her mouth and sidled uncomfortably by him.

Ahead, Charlie pushed open the door and Bella climbed the few stairs, being ushered under his arm while her father glared daggers past her.

Squaring his shoulders, Jacob met his stare with steely eyes and an iron jaw, until finally the man backed down and turned into the house.

Letting his eyes flutter shut, Jacob drew in a deep breath and then braced his hands against the washer as he pushed a sigh from his cheeks. Flicking the machine back on, he listened to gurgling chug of clothes, the rain tapping restlessly on the roof, and the conspicuous silence in the house.

He was _Alpha_, damn it, and he had no idea how Sam had kept as much of his mind as he had. This thing was fucking torture: pure, unmitigated, crazy-making torment.

And he had no idea how he was going survive it.

There were a host of other problems that were vying for his attention, and he'd never been so close to his breaking point. Though, oddly, he'd never felt so close to being whole as well. That stolen moment of respite - his forehead on Bella's shoulder while he rode the sway of her breath and counted her heartbeats - was the most peace he'd felt since the first ache in his bones. It was part of this insidious curse, to be sure, but it was also an undeniable function of what they'd always had.

What she was offering him.

The sound of the engine out front turning over had Jacob lifting his head with a spike of anxiety. She was leaving, and the wolf was beyond agitated by the thought. Yet that compulsion wasn't quite as demanding as it had been over this last day. Had the beast been mollified by the feel of her in his arms or her words that were pregnant with peace and promise? Or was it just that his instinct was distracted?

The hairs were prickling on the back of his neck, and finally Jacob turned his attention to the niggling feeling of dread that was coiling in his gut. Charlie had been stressed before he'd found a man between his daughter's thighs and there was something significant about that - though Jacob had absolutely no rational explanation as to why.

Straightening, he shook out his cagey muscles and took crossed the to the stairs, taking them in one huge stride. The house still smelled of cleaner - and now lasagna - but it smelled of Bella too.

And just that was comforting.

As he let the screen close behind him and stalked down the dark hall, Jacob began ordering his thoughts. He strode into the living area to find his father waiting for him in the silence, an intense and loaded look in his eye.

Jacob ignored it and turned into the kitchen. A piping hot tray of lasagna was sitting on top of the stove and it smelled like a several servings of heaven. He pulled a spoon out of the dish drain along with a plate and dished up a generous human portion, set it on the counter, and then went to work on the rest.

" 'Charlie say what was wrong?" he asked, leaning his forearm on the counter and digging out a huge spoonful of the casserole from the pan. He shoved it past his lips, barely noticing the heat and nearly died from ecstasy. _This_ is what he needed - just a moment to fill his body and distract his mind.

"Some murder," his father related, his chair squeaking across the floorboards.

Jacob's mouth froze mid-chew. He straightened, turning around as he swallowed the mouthful whole.

"Leeches?" Jacob asked, leaning his hips back against the counter.

"Don't rightly know," Billy huffed, wheeling his chair to a stop and folding his hands in his lap. "He was too pissed to gimme any more when he dragged Bella on outta here." He cocked his head with questioning raise of his brow.

Jacob petulantly rolled his eyes and reached over to dig out another serving spoonful.

His father sighed heavily while Jacob shoved a wordless bite into his mouth. "But Bella? She looked alright," he commented dryly.

Jacob's gaze darted up to those shrewd eyes.

"Let 'er in, Jake," he said quietly. "She loves you."

Jacob's eyes drifted to the floor as his mouth mechanically chewed.

"Fact is, she ain't the only one."

Swallowing his monster bite like a golf ball, Jacob blinked down at his father.

Billy met his gaze with unadorned eyes for a moment - pride, regret, concern softening their depths. Jacob had to look away under the pretense of handing the old man his plate.

His father chuckled lightly as he took the food with a wrinkled hand. "Those damn Mariners lost again," he snorted. "They should sign me on - I'd do 'em better than Vargas."

Jacob sniffed a laugh - more at his father's transparency than his wit - as he reached up and grabbed him a fork.

But just then Jacob's phone vibrated in his jeans pocket and the utensil clattered unheeded to the counter as his heart rate jacked up from zero to sixty before it had finished the first ring. He _knew_ that vibe-tone - even though (thankfully) it was one he'd only heard twice before. He met his father's gaze with a curt affirming nod to his silent question as he fished out the rugged cell and flipped it open.

"Cullen," he spat the word like a curse without pretense or preamble.

"Good afternoon, Jacob Black," the doctor's melodic voice crooned with insultingly polite solicitation. "How have you been?"

"Whattaya want?" he demanded, letting the annoyance bleed clearly into his tone. These leeches always wanted to pretend that they were friends.

They were nothing of the sort.

Carlisle cleared his throat with civil annoyance. "This is a courtesy call, Jacob," he said quietly. "It seems that we have a problem."

_Another_ problem was the last thing Jacob needed.

'

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_Review if you like._


	7. Enemies

_Many mahalos to Tayjayfan for the preread. _

_'_

_As always, thanks for reading._

_'_

'

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**Chapter 7 - Enemies**

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'

Bella splashed water over her face and watched it dribble back into the graying porcelain basin. The tinkling sound was as soothing as the rejuvenating coolness.

She had never felt so alone.

Even though - courtesy of her uncharacteristically hovering father - it felt like she hadn't had a moment to herself in the last five days. Charlie had dragged her into the station over the weekend and was home after school every day - watching her out of the corner of his eye with a frown crouched under his prickling mustache. Her eyes fluttered closed on memories.

"_I thought you two were… ehm.. __friends__, Bells." The words had sounded as tense as her father's hands on the steering wheel of her truck. When he had finally spoken into the suffocating silence on the way home from Jacob's house it had just tightened the noose._

"_We were," she whispered hollowly, as her forehead leaned against the window._

"_So what the hell was __that__?" he hissed._

She'd told him she didn't know but deep inside her the truth was carved into each lonely choking beat of her heart:

_Need_.

In that single fleeting moment five eternal days ago, cupped in the solace of Jacob's warm calloused palms, she'd breathed that single spoken word from his lips.

_Need. _

A million times more intimate than an actual kiss, it had taken root in her soul. It had blossomed deep within her body and heart into long sleepless nights and longer restless days with a yearning that continuously churned in her stomach, ached down to her bones and vibrated gratingly in her teeth so that she had to fight a perpetual grimace.

_Need._

She needed so, so much from Jacob Black right now: explanations, reassurances, comfort, apologies… but she'd be content with just the containment of his arms. Right now, Bella felt like nothing more than an apparition - a simple curl of heat shimmering up from a hot summer road. Life as she'd known it had been blown into smithereens and the strong mooring lines that he'd always given her - that had always anchored her in the most tumultuous of seas - were severed.

Jacob had left her adrift without so much as a phone call or text for five days.

She felt abandoned by both him _and_ his father - somehow she'd hoped Billy would have reached out to bridge the distance even if his son hadn't been able to. But he hadn't and she was left frantically treading water, struggling to keep her head above tossing insanity so she could make it through day after day of utter futility without Jacob.

Like this one.

She'd made it through _four_ school days so far; an interminable parade of boring classes and curious stares, empty small talk and tittering gossip. Bella had never been particularly enamored of the institution - she did the work to graduate to more meaningful days - but never had it seemed so utterly pointless as it did now.

_Now_.

Now watching girls reapplying lip gloss between classes and boys striking posturing poses against lockers was nothing short of ludicrous when only thirty short miles away, across the borders of class and race, youth and innocence had been stripped from her best friend in a matter of months.

Jacob - and at least three other boys - were struggling to make sense of a world that had no right to exist outside of nightmares, while _here_ kids paraded the halls complaining about homework and worrying about who they were going to sit with at lunch. All while Bella wandered numbly along a scripted schedule from a computer print-out and her heart flailed and stuttered in her chest.

She wanted to scream.

But she didn't. Instead, she swallowed down the frustration like magma and begged for a pass from the English teacher to pilfer a few moments alone before the period bell.

Bella splashed another handful of water over her face and lifted her head, blinking the droplets from her lashes as she reached out blind hands for the paper towels. She yanked out two rough brown sheets and patted them over her face as she opened her eyes to her reflection.

But there wasn't a pass in the world that could save her from herself - her own worst enemy. Bracing her hands on either side of the sink, she stared coldly at the girl blinking back at her. She looked like crap: her eyes were shadowed by dark circles, her skin was even paler than usual, and her lips were chalky and chapped. She looked as empty and hollow as she felt.

_RIIIINNG!_

The shrill metallic school bell ripped through the hallways outside the girls' bathroom and Bella squeezed her eyes shut in dread. Her free pass from reality was over.

Snatching up the slip of paper on the shelf, she balled it up bitterly in her fist along with the paper towels and threw it in the trash. With a stuffy sniffle, she hunched her shoulders up to her ears as the door to the bathroom banged open with the flood of tittering girls pressing their books up against push-up bras. Bella pulled the corner of her lip in her mouth and fielded the sidelong glances and judgmental frowns being tossed her way in the mirror.

Drawing in a steeling breath, she straightened her kitschy bowling shirt. Everything in high school was a contest and she'd always dressed in a way that clearly advertised that she wouldn't play. The first day had been the worst: students had tried to pull her into curious conversations as the shiny little novelty of a small-town senior year. But finally, like a game of bean-bag toss, they'd decided which of the "inconsequential" slots to stuff her into and all the important people were making a point to ignore her.

Bella bent down to collect her books from the floor as girls filed up behind her to get a glimpse of themselves in the almighty mirror.

"Hey Bella," a soft voice called. "Are you doing okay?"

Of course in times like this, the _truly_ important people rose to the surface of the fray like cream. People like Angela Webber who could see below the defensive veneer to both the depth and despair below.

Bella looked up with a wan smile at the girl leaning against the tiles as she pulled her books into her arms.

"Oops…" Angela's arm darted out to pull her away from imminent impact with the sink as Bella straightened with her usual grace.

"Sorry," Bella rolled her eyes.

"Why are you sorry?" Angela asked with that gentle smile.

Bella wrinkled her nose. She might be quiet and quirky, but Bella wasn't usually so insecure. She felt so _off_.

"You wanna walk to bio with me?" she asked.

Bella nodded as they wove through the girls gathering like a flock of squawking seagulls around the shiny mirror. Following Angela out into the bustling hall, Bella took a resetting breath.

They wordlessly fell into step on their way to their lockers which were nearly side by side - Swan and Webber _were_ at the end of the alphabet after all. Bella usually quickly settled down with a group of friends at a new school, but at the moment she was so torn up inside, she could barely get through the day, much less reach out for new friends. Luckily her last name had done all the work for her in Forks.

"So only one more day until the weekend," Angela announced, pulling open her locker. "D'you have any plans?"

Bella yanked down her own lock and pulled open the drab metal locker. "Not really," she murmured - though in her heart, she certainly did. She _needed_ to see Jacob… actually, truth be told, she didn't know if she could wait any longer.

"Well if you want to get together and study…" Angela left the statement dangling in the air between them.

Until Eric Yorkie (another end of the alphabet lurker and kindred spirit) sliced it in two as he fell back against the locker between them. "Howdy ladies," he grinned. Glancing first at Angela and then Bella, he blew a lock of hair out of his eyes with geeky bravado.

Bella smiled in spite of herself - his artless goofiness was refreshing. It reminded her of… well, the way Quil _used_ to be. The happiness shriveled on her lips.

"What?" he pouted at her expression, pushing out his lower lip theatrically.

"Nothing," Bella tucked her head and pulled out her bio books. "You just reminded me of someone."

She closed her locker just in time to catch Angela's reprimanding frown at him.

"Geez," he huffed, pushing off the lockers and pulling Angela and Bella under each arm. "I was just wondering if you two were going to make the yearbook meeting today after school," he whined, steering them down the hall.

Angela leaned around his chest. "I was going to go," she lifted her brow encouragingly.

Bella worried her lip, for a moment. "Maybe," she hedged lamely. "Lemme check in with my dad later on."

"Sucks to be the Police Chief's daughter," Eric laughed.

"Especially now, huh Bella?" Angela frowned. "But they still think it was some kinda mountain lion?"

"Yeah, I think," Bella mumbled vaguely. The whole town had been shocked this past weekend by the death of a girl not much older than they were. The party line was that she'd been hiking and had been mauled, but her father had told her the true story: her car had broken down and she'd been dragged into the woods and brutally murdered. Charlie wouldn't say how.

"Spooky shit," Eric shuddered between them melodramatically. "No wonder Chief Swan's got the city girl on such a tight leash."

Bella rolled her eyes with a graceless snort.

Angela slapped his chest in reprimand. "Have _you_ ever been hiking in your life?" she countered.

"Does Skyrim count?" he smirked impishly.

"You are such a nerd!" Angela accused with an affectionate laugh.

"Why thank you," he grinned.

"So I'll let you know later, kay?" Bella chuckled, subtly pulling out from under Eric's arm. She couldn't help but compare the way it felt to be tucked into his lanky adolescent frame to being surrounded by Jacob's unnaturally heated bulk. It felt decidedly _wrong_.

Eric released both girls but snagged each of their hands on the way, pulling them around. "I'll see you at lunch, m'ladies," he announced grandly, pressing a sloppy kiss to each of their hands and then backing away down the hall with a flamboyant bow.

He knocked soundly into one of the resident jocks and spluttered an apology before throwing them a wink and sauntering off.

Bella wiped the back of her hand off on her jeans while Angela giggled. "That boy's crazy," she laughed.

"But he's sweet," Bella smiled.

"Oh don't say that," Angela murmured ominously as they once again fell into step toward the science wing. "He wants to ask you out you know," she informed her.

Bella blinked, her entire body whipping around in both surprise and magnificent overreaction.

Angela pushed her glasses up her nose. "Do you have a boyfriend Bella?"

Swallowing thickly, Bella tried to get her crazy racing pulse under control. What was wrong with her? Oh hell, she knew _exactly_ what was wrong.

"I mean in Arizona or…" she amended, but her eyes were washing cannily over her face.

"Um, well…" Bella licked her lips. "I guess there's someone," she hedged quietly.

Angela's eyebrows shot up. "Here?"

Bella took a step back, pressing her shoulder blades against the wall by the bio door as all of the unfettered confusion and emotion bobbed up to the surface in a knotted mess. "Well there's an old friend of mine down on the Rez," she whispered, shifting uncomfortably. "But it's complicated."

"Girl, men always are," Angela smiled kindly - silently communicating she wouldn't press further. "But Eric's not the only one who's gonna be disappointed. I forgot to tell you…" she tipped her head meaningfully toward the open bio door that several students were filing through.

Bella frowned and peeked around the doorframe.

Her shoulders sagged with her sigh of defeat as she turned back around and leaned her head against the wall with a solid _thunk_.

"He's baaack," Angela wiggled her eyebrows comically.

Bella's eyes fluttered closed in dread. _Edward Cullen_.

He'd only been in school _one_ day this week, but in that one day he'd banked at least a year's worth of staring.

To say he made her uncomfortable was an understatement.

Bella wasn't the type to make snap-judgments and she certainly didn't give a damn about the gossip about his unconventional family, but there was something about them all that just bothered her. For one thing, in this rural working-class town, the Cullens stuck out with their conspicuous wealthy perfection like a sore thumb - just like girls who wore a full face of make-up to the gym. But the fact that the entire school mooned after them like they were movie stars piqued Bella's rebellious streak, so under any other circumstances she'd be happy to ignore both them and her instincts.

But it was kind of hard to ignore someone who …_stared_.

_Of course_ he'd been assigned as her lab partner in bio. But he'd all staring stopped the moment she'd sat down beside him...in fact, he'd clapped his hand over his nose like she stunk to high hell and nearly torn the class door off in his haste to escape.

"Not this guy again," Bella whispered forlornly. Dealing with this strangeness was the last thing she needed at the moment. Or ever. "I thought maybe he'd transferred or something."

"Hoped, you mean?" Angela quipped.

Her eyes popped open to Angela's sympathetic grimace. Bella released a huffing breath; she was being ridiculous. Her life was already complicated enough, she wasn't going to let some Abercrombie wannabe with a staring and olfactory problem intimidate her. Drawing back her shoulders she set her jaw with resolve.

An amused smile bled into Angela's face. "I'll see you at lunch?"

Bella nodded and then folded around the doorframe, courageously soldiering toward the boy sitting stiffly at her lab desk.

_Staring_.

'

'

Bella's phone vibrated on the passenger's seat beside her. With a sigh, she lifted her head from where it'd been resting heavily on steering wheel of her truck. As soon as the last bell had rung, she'd fled to the parking lot - without even stopping at her locker - and thrown herself into comforting solace of solitude in her beat-up Chevy.

Her hand flipped the phone open and brought it to her cheek without even bothering to look at the number. Only one person called her these days.

"Hey, dad," she sighed.

"Bella, where are you?" Charlie's voice was terse and tense… worried.

Jerking up in her seat, Bella blinked into sentience as her eyes panned the students meandering their way out of the old brick school. "I'm still at school, why?"

Her father released a soft breath of what sounded like relief. "I'm not gonna make it home 'til late, kid," he mumbled, obviously trying to inject some kind of casualness into the words, but failing miserably. "So, um, why don't you head on down to the station and do your homework. You can get dinner at the diner."

"Dad," Bella sat up straighter with a frown. "What's wrong," she demanded quietly. She didn't have the energy for any subtext right now.

Her father paused on the other end and she heard him lick his lips. "There was another one today, Bella. Grown man this time," he said with fraudulent dispassion.

"Oh no," she gasped into the phone.

"A guy who keeps his boat up on the lake. I, uh… I knew him," he stammered and this time Bella didn't mind the subtext one bit.

"I'm sorry, dad," she whispered, letting sincerity anchor the sentiment.

Charlie cleared his throat. "So um, I don't want you alone tonight, got that?" he said in a voice that had crystallized back into business. "Why don't you go on up to the station …"

"There's a yearbook meeting after school that some friends of mine were going to go to," Bella offered quickly. She really didn't want to spend the evening in a conference room that smelled of stale coffee with it's uncomfortable doctor's office chairs. Plus, shamefully an idea was already starting to take shape - the same plan, hope… _need_ that had followed her around these last five days.

"After that I want you to go -"

"And then I can go over to Angela's house and hang out and do homework," she amended briskly. Her stomach twisted in a sickening knot at the lie, but Bella was desperate at this point.

Her father drew in a hedging breath and Bella pressed her lips together and prayed.

"Alright," he huffed. "But I don't have to tell you not to go down-"

"Nope!" she interrupted brusquely. (It was better if she wasn't defying a direct order, wasn't it?) "I got it. Just call me when you're coming home."

"Well I'll call _before_ that to check in," he grumbled.

Bella clenched her eyes shut in shame. "Be careful, dad, kay?" she whispered.

"Always am," he said curtly. "Love ya, kid."

Bella blinked in surprise - she knew how her father felt, but she could count on one hand the times he'd admitted so in words. It must be bad. "Love you too, dad," she whispered into the click of the ending call.

She brought the phone down to her lap and stared at it for a minute. With a soft sigh she sent him a text with the words he'd missed "Luv u 2" and then snapped the phone shut. Guilty adrenaline coursing through her veins, she looked up at the bustling parking lot. Her gaze was immediately snatched by a set of piercing eyes.

Bella released a sigh and forced a smile that was echoed by his thin lips.

Today, Edward Cullen hadn't been content just to stare, he'd wanted to talk too. From the awkward small talk in biology to subtle interrogation in the hall, he'd followed her - snatching up her books solicitously and guiding her with his hand at the small of her back. It should have felt casual: the chivalrous - if not somewhat old fashioned - overtures of a boy expressing an interest in friendship.

At another time, she probably would have accepted the offer with a good natured shrug. She could see the loneliness that lurked behind that designer façade and Bella was known for her caring heart. But in this time and place, his furtive intensity was suffocating.

And uncomfortable.

The rest of his family was piling into their fancy cars and his sister Alice came around behind him, crossing her arms petulantly over her chest. His expression darkened instantly as he whipped around like she'd yelled at him. With a frown - and not even a backward glance - he threw himself into the back seat while Bella watched, strangely unable to look away like it was a car wreck. Seeming unperturbed, Alice cannily turned to Bella with a bright smile and a wiggle of her fingers before she slipped into the driver's seat. And with the roar of high-performance engines, the two cars peeled out of the school parking lot while students turned and gaped with varying expressions of awe and envy.

Utterly bewildered, Bella turned back to the dashboard and stared at the old needle dials for moment. She couldn't stand any of this anymore.

She _needed_ to see Jacob.

Nibbling on her lip, she opened her phone back up as an afterthought and sent a quick text to Angela: "Sorry, can't make yrbk. MB study? I'll call."

Pleased with her little flash of foresight, Bella tossed the cell into the passenger's seat and shoved her key in the steering column.

As she edged her truck out of the parking lot and onto the town roads she thought about the strangeness that was Edward Cullen. She couldn't put her finger on it, but there was something odd about him - other than the staring thing. His movements were almost too quick and sharp… and those eyes. His new contacts didn't soften them one bit - if anything they made them _more_ unnerving. And he'd _lied_ about the contacts to her face. What a stupid thing to lie about.

Bella chuckled softly to herself, expelling some of the stress from the day in desperate humor. She was definitely on the road to losing her mind.

All too soon the grocery store was coming up on the other side of the stoplight. She was going to arm herself with store-bought (gasp) pastries and head down to JP&E auto.

Bella was biting her lip to hell with all the possibilities as she pulled into a stall and jerked up the parking break with gusto. But oddly she was feeling more grounded than she had in almost a week.

She had a plan: she was going to see Jacob.

Walking through the doors of the battered grocery, Bella headed straight for the back of store. It hadn't changed at all for as long as she could remember with its scripty signs advertising specials and two old fashioned cash registers where a regular cast of older ladies rang in the purchases by hand. Her Chucks squeaked on the worn linoleum as she stalked down the bakery aisle. Stopping by the case, she pulled out a pink paper box and a plastic sheet and began throwing in donuts and pastries that looked a little worse for wear already while she idly counted in her head.

_Probably two for each guy? And then if Claire were there…_

Throwing in an extra couple for good measure she slammed the rickety case shut and spun around.

And predictably ran right into someone, the box jettisoning from her hands. The boy grabbed it on its way to the floor (with impressive reflexes) and steadied her with a low good natured laugh that sounded oddly familiar.

"I'm soo sorry!" Bella squeaked, pulling the box into her hands and looking up. She froze, blinking in surprise.

"Bella Swan," the boy smiled, his white teeth flashing in his tawny skin. "Crazy running into _you_ here."

"Literally, huh?" Bella laughed humorlessly while her eyes ran over little Seth Clearwater. Well he wasn't so little any more; he'd grown up quite a bit since the last time she'd seen him. But it was a natural, normal growth that was in the realm of adolescent possibility. And just that was comforting.

"Some stuff don't change," he winked, shoving his hands in his pockets and taking a step back with a teenaged attempt at suave. He wasn't that little boy any more, but he was still teetering on the edges of adorable.

"_You_ did though Seth," Bella smiled, circling both hands around the box. "You're all grown up, huh?"

Seth's eyes dipped to the ground as he tried to smoother his boyish smile of pleasure. "Yeah, I guess," he mumbled.

"I'm surprised to catch you here," Bella glanced around the timeworn store with wrinkle of her nose. It was unusual to find anyone from La Push shopping in Forks for a host of reasons ranging from the practical to the uncomfortable. Bella had always despised the subtle racism in this town - her father had explained that some people needed to bolster their egos by looking down on folks worse off than them. Bella had told him she didn't want to know any of those people - her father had had to agree.

"Yeah," he shifted uncomfortably. "We don't shop down on the Rez anymore. Not since…"

"Fraternizing with the enemy, bro?" A curt caustic voice heralded a hand reaching out to roughly muss his hair.

Taken aback, Bella turned to the tall striking woman who stepped to her brother's side. Leah Clearwater was watching her with hard challenging eyes.

Bella blinked. Leah had always been a little intimidating - she had a blunt, no-nonsense way about her - but she'd also always been… _polite_.

"Or did the illustrious Jacob Black drop you like bad case of clap too," she smirked bitterly.

"Lee, _c'mon_," Seth hissed and Bella's gaze darted to her brother's apologetic grimace.

Swallowing thickly, Bella tried get her bearings as her eyes darted automatically to the woman's left hand.

Sharp as she was, Leah stuck it out and wiggled her conspicuously bare fingers tauntingly. Bella didn't know much about the Clearwater girl, but she knew the fact she'd been engaged before she'd graduated high school to the older Sam Uley had been both a source of controversy and gossip down on the Rez last summer.

"Look, I just got back last week, Leah," Bella met her eyes, lifting her chin as she struggled to put all the pieces together and still keep her cool. "So sorry if I'm a little behind on Rez gossip."

Leah's brow raised. "But you've seen him?" she accused.

"Jake? Briefly," Bella said curtly, willing her voice steady as she squeezed the box to her chest.

"Then you also know you should keep it that way," Leah disparaged with a sniff. "If y'know what I mean."

Bella couldn't help the protective fire that ignited in her gut. "No," she cocked her head, painting on a saccharine smile while her hands sweated bullets. "I don't think I do."

Leah laughed humorlessly with a little shake of her head - Bella couldn't tell if it was in appreciation for her gall or scorn. "Look Swan," she sighed with a little patronizing click of her tongue. "I always thought you were alright, so lemme tell it to you straight, woman to woman: stay away from Jacob Black," she hissed vehemently.

It made Bella's stomach take a sickening dive.

" 'Less you wanna repeat of all the shit I' been through this year."

In that instant, Bella saw the flash of pain behind that hard stare. She probably should leave it at this, but Bella wanted to know what the Rez was saying about Jake. "Why, Leah?" she asked quietly.

Leah rolled her eyes, raking her hands through her enviable long silky hair. "Geziss Swan," she huffed under her breath. "You always were a stubborn little -…" she broke the sentence off in a coughing laugh.

Bella arched a bland brow.

"And I like that," she met Bella's gaze with a smile that gave her whiplash. "But this time, take my advice and let it rest." Leah took a step closer, her eyes flicking absently down the deserted aisle as she lowered her voice. "Look there's some crazy shit going down on the Rez. I mean, Sammy turned into a two-timing crack-head overnight. And come to find out it's all 'cause a _little Jacob Black_," she twisted the words in a hateful sneer.

Bella tried to swallow down the lump in her throat.

With a bitter smile, Leah's eyes darted between Bella's as she watched her face redden. "I don't know what all Black's gotten into. Gangbanging, guns…. _drugs_, definitely - if you've seen him you know _that_," she snorted. "But whatever it is, even the Counsel's too afraid to call 'em on it."

"Hey, Dad's been sick," Seth complained, stepping in with boyish pride in defense of his father.

Like her brother had flipped a switch, Leah's expression changed and she stepped back, glancing at Bella before turning more to her brother. "I know, Boo-Boo," she sighed, clapping her hand on his shoulder. "Or he woulda done _something_." There was the weight of covert concern in her flippant words.

"Don't call me that," Seth complained, jerking out from under her hand with sibling righteousness.

Bella drew in a shaking breath, as the focus on her thankfully wavered.

Seth frowned at his sister and then turned back to Bella. "Sorry… it's just things are…" he left the sentence dangling.

"Complicated?" Bella filled it in for him with a sad smile. "_Believe me_ I get it."

"Do you?" Leah turned back around with a raised brow. "Then you'll cut your losses and stay off the Rez," she spat. "I'm outta here too as soon as Boo-Boo-"

"Hey!"

Leah winked slyly at Bella. "As soon as dad's better and Seth's transferred schools up to the Makah Rez. We spent the summer there and you liked it, right Seth?"

Seth rolled his eyes with hedging foot shuffle.

"So maybe I'll see you 'round here, huh?" Leah smirked, her eyes flicking back and forth across the dingy aisle.

"Yeah," Bella nodded a little too enthusiastically, feeling suddenly guilty about her clandestine destination.

"Bye Bella," Seth called with a bright smile.

"See ya, Swan," Leah tipped her chin and started after him. She whipped back around, startling Bella as she leaned in close. "But girl to girl," she whispered, invading her personal space. "You gotta lay off that perfume… it's..." She jerked back with a wrinkled nose, pulling a hissing breath through her grimace.

Beyond mortified, Bella felt like all the blood had been shucked up to her face.

"It's all good, Swan," Leah took pity on her, giving her a collegial sock to the shoulder. "See y'around."

Bella stared dumbly after them for a moment - a million and one things competing for attention in a brain that was already overloaded - and then she turned around and headed directly for the personal products section.

Cullen and now this? She was changing her shampoo. Hell, her soap, too.

'

'

After a brief and paranoid stop at her house to take a record-breaking shower, Bella was finally driving down country roads. As soon as her truck rumbled over the Rez borders, she expelled a long, loaded sigh like she'd passed some invisible finish line.

Because she had.

Of course that brief sense of relief didn't last long. The closer she got to JP&E Auto, the stiffer she sat in her seat and the tighter she gripped the wheel.

_Casual_. She'd decided she was going to play this thing casual. She was just stopping by with donuts to hang out with old friends after school and suck down a warm soda. Easy-breezy, right?

Her butterfly stomach took a disappointed dive as she rounded the corner to the garage: the gaggle of indigent cars were all neatly tucked away, parked off on the side of the shop with the air of the end of the day.

But as she pulled right up to the cleared yard, she saw movement over by the shop building. Paul Lahote was pulling down the metal roll-up door, the muscles in his bare back flexing with lissome power.

Bella huffed a breath through her cheeks. _Great_. Probably the _last_ person she wanted to see right now. Well, after dealing with Edward at school today, _second_ to last. He turned around with an acerbic annoyance and roll of his eyes that announced clearly that the feeling was mutual.

Squinting at him, Bella cut the engine and sat there for several heartbeats in a staring contest. Slowly her lips pursed with resolve. She'd wasted a lie to her dad and come all this way - both figuratively and otherwise - so she wasn't willing to give up on finding Jacob yet.

Straightening her spine, she turned to grab the donuts off the bench seat as an olive branch… or just a good old fashioned bribe.

Shaking the box lightly to resettle the confections, she turned back around and winced. Paul was right at her door, leaning down to peer into the window. All the usual snark was calcified in a grim solemnity - an expression she'd never seen on his face.

It was intimidating.

But Bella had had enough of intimidation today. Painting on a sweet smile, she reached out and jerked the door handle open.

It didn't budge.

She tried a few more times - putting her body into it - before she realized ...he was holding it fast from the outside! Her mouth popped open in indignant shock.

"Let me _out_," she complained in a huff.

From outside the truck, Paul shook his head slowly back and forth, his lips hitching up on one side in his signature sardonic smirk. The familiarity was comforting and stoked her resolve.

Tossing the donuts thoughtlessly back to the seat, she rolled down the window with several labored pumps of her arm.

"Paul!" she screeched.

His mouth opened like he was going to deliver one of his typical snide retorts, but the words caught in the back of his throat.

"Gah," he choked with a vexed shake of his head like she was a million miles beyond annoying.

With a frustrated sigh he turned toward the building. "Quil!" he yelled tersely. "Can you come tell 'er Jake's not here?"

After Edward's strangeness - and then Leah - it was disconcerting, to say the least. If there was one thing she thought she could rely on through all this craziness it was Paul's verbal cut and thrust.

Bella's mouth open incredulously. "What the hell, Paul?"

He turned back to her with a mocking sneer, his tongue poking out childishly.

"What are you, _two_?" she bit out disparagingly.

His lip curled while his eyes narrowed. But he didn't say a word.

Quil appeared suddenly beside him, his gaze running over Paul with something akin to glee. "He can't talk, Bella," his words bounced over chuckles.

Paul socked him in the arm hard and it sounded like he'd hit a refrigerator. But it accomplished the opposite of its apparent intent: Quil disintegrated into gawky chortles.

"Since when has _Paul_ ever had trouble _running his mouth_," Bella snorted sarcastically, grabbing the tail of humor and holding on for dear life as she leaned out the window to see the two giants.

Quil gave her a delighted grin. "That's true… I think we should make it a national holiday."

Paul slammed his hand on the top of the truck with a bang, making Bella jump six inches off the seat.

Quil glanced at her with a wink and then met Paul's death stare, his lips rounding in a comically perfect 'O.'

"Ohshit," he gasped theatrically. "Paul, you _scared_ her!"

Oddly the taunt wiped the threat from Paul's face in a nanosecond, and he whipped around, his widened gaze snapping to Bella with an overstated concern that flirted with terror.

Bella's brow knit with confusion as her eyes ran over such an absurd expression and another first for Paul.

Quil, however, doubled over with cackling exuberance.

Without another word, Paul aimed another sledgehammer fist to Quil's side and stalked off, fury in his stride.

Bella watched him go with a knitted brow, beyond bewildered.

"Quil!" Bella whined.

Quil straightened, wiping his hands under each eye theatrically. "Ohmygod, that was fucking _awesome_," he panted.

"What the _hell_ is going on?" Bella demanded, slapping her palms on the truck's sill.

At her tone, Quil's mirth dissipated. "He _can't_ talk to you Bella," he smiled kindly. "Ask Jake."

"I would if I knew where he was," Bella huffed, rearranging herself on the seat and gripping the ledge.

"He's not here," he said quietly, his eyes softening sympathetically. "And… well," he sniffed, wrinkling his nose. "Well, there's some _stuff_," he paused, widening his eyes meaningfully. "Some stuff is going down, so it's really not a good time."

Bella's heart dropped to her stomach like a lead ballast.

Quil regretfully pursed his lips. "You should _go home_, Bella," he pressed, gently covering one of her hands on the sill to soften the rejection.

Bella blinked into his pointed stare. In the same abrupt mercurial way as Paul, his face had gone utterly somber - in fact, she'd never in her life seen Quil so serious. In a flash of insight she realized the two boys' normal rambunctious personas were now nothing more than a flimsy façade now over … _this_.

This _gravity_.

Bella searched his eyes desperately for some ghost of his former teenage innocence. She found none.

_Like Jacob._

"Is h-he okay…?" she stammered, her voice squeaking with stress.

Quil patted her fingers and then shoved his hands in his pockets as he took a step back. "Go home, Bella," he whispered.

"I've got donuts…" The words burst over her lips in a desperate appeal. It was _pathetic_. She knew because of the pitying look Quil gave her.

"Home," he repeated, and then without another word, he turned and strode toward the garage.

All volatile hope was evaporating like gasoline in the rippling, noxious fumes of desolation.

Suddenly all Bella wanted to _do_ was go home. To flee all this insanity and despair, broken people and her own broken heart to some safe harbor where she could retreat and regroup.

She just didn't know where that was anymore.

With numb fingers Bella turned the keys in the ignition and drove.

Twenty thoughtless minutes later she found herself at the beach.

Heavy grey clouds were resting forlornly on the slate ocean horizon. The waves tumbled to the shore in roaring curls that were swallowed by sand into an intimate whisper like a lover's quarrel.

Even stormy and overcast First Beach was comforting. So many memories jostled with the tossing waves it was nostalgic and comforting like looking at a scrapbook of her childhood. No wonder her body had brought her here.

Bella shut the door of the truck and walked out to the edge of the beach grasses and cast her eyes down the dunes and the empty track of mottled sand. Her eyes closed briefly as she pulled the salty air over her lips and then bent down to unlace her sneakers. This is what she needed: just a moment to steep her heavy heart in kinder, gentler days.

Stepping out of her shoes, she tiptoed down sharp, rocky path to the beach's edge. With a sigh, she wrapped her flannel over-shirt over her tank along and trudged through the damp coarse sand, her feet being led by her heart to the old fallen tree where Jacob and she had spent many an afternoon. It reminded her of that story from childhood that used to make her cry: the Giving Tree. It's weathered trunk may have been stripped of its branches long ago and its color siphoned off by sun, salt and time, but it always been the perfect place for laughter, confidences or companionable silence.

It was a physical manifestation of all she and Jacob used to have. Of course she would come here: it was the last piece of him she had left in many ways.

Snatching her flyaway hair from the breeze, she twisted it into a knot and tucked it under the collar of her shirt as she sat down on the smooth bleached wood. Her eyes swept out over the soothing rhythmic ocean and watched the storm darkening the horizon, leaking columns of rain onto chicken skin waves.

It didn't feel the same.

Biting her lip, Bella closed her eyes on the sea. She dug her feet in the grounding sand as she doubled over, wrapping her arms tighter around her middle in a futile bid to hold her shattered being together. Like the tide, despair rose up inside her with a suffocating mandate until she could no longer bear the pressure.

And Bella cried.

Her arms squeezed tighter, trying to suffocate the convulsions but only succeeded in muffling them into pitiful squeaking hiccups.

It wasn't supposed to be like this.

Bella usually could find some plan or direction to soothe her hopelessness, but in these doldrum days all she was left with was sagging sails. She felt caught in an undertow that was steadily pulling her under.

A soft chuff heralded a hot puff of air on her neck and Bella's body instantly stiffened. Her breath stalled on her lips as she whipped around. Her body shot off the tree, spinning around to stumble across the sand, before her mind could even process what was before her eyes.

_Holy crap!_

Falling gracelessly on her butt, she continued to scrabble frantically backward in the sand out of sheer terror. Before her eyes loomed the largest animal she'd ever seen in her life! A russet wolf - as big as a draft horse and twice as bulky - dipped its head down toward her as its ears flattened.

Yanking her knees to her chest in an instinctual ploy to make the smallest target possible, another strange strangled squeak escaped her throat.

The animal's ears perked up at the sound and it cocked its head.

The movement was eerily reminiscent of Jake's when he'd lost it that day, and finally her brain clicked into gear.

"J-Jake?" His name left her lips on a hoarse whisper.

The wolf blinked solemnly as he raised his head, his fur rustling with the movement, and Bella focused on his eyes. Eerie luminescent yellow and fiercely intelligent, they were as out of place in the animal as they had been in the man.

_This_ was - without a doubt - _Jacob_.

And she had been very, _very_ wrong in her flip remarks. He didn't turn into a giant _dog_… not at all. There was nothing domesticated about this beast. This was a creature that defied all category: too sentient and dignified to be an animal, too feral and wild to be anything else.

Not so strangely perhaps, that initial self-preservative panic dissipated in sheer awe. _He'd never hurt her_, that voice whispered someplace deep and sure in her being.

The wolf huffed and lifted his muzzle to the breeze, his nostrils stretching in his licorice nose while those intense eyes stayed locked with hers.

Bella found herself _needing_ to drop her gaze to the sand.

Drawing in a shaking breath, she rearranged her limbs and pointedly tried to let all the residual anxiety slip into the continued percussion of waves. Movement out of the corner of her eye made her glance back up to find the wolf slinking slowly around the old tree toward her. His sinewy muscles rippled in fluid concert under the sleek gleaming fur. Despite its size, the animal moved agile and light on its paws with a cagey alert power behind each fluid slink.

Bella found herself inching around away from him, head tucking under the curtain of escaped hair, simply unable to curb the instinct to cower from the feral power that stalked her across the beach. This animal was an incontrovertible predator and her own DNA was programmed for self-preservation, no matter what excuses were proffered by her heart of her head.

A low coarse grumble like black pepper skittered across the sand and Bella peeked over her shoulder with an apologetic grimace.

"I'm sorry, Jake," she whispered. "You're just… well," she licked her lips and tossed her hair over her shoulder to be caught by the wind. "You're kinda scary," she rasped with a little nervous laugh.

The words didn't seem to appease the animal, at all. It was staring intensely at her from eyes hooded with displeasure while that sound continued to vibrate in its barrel chest.

Bella closed her eyes, drawing in a long cooling breath as she forced herself to relax. If there was one thing Bella was good at, it was observing. And, even through the muddled messy memories of the tumultuous and traumatic last week, her subconscious had gathered two facts that were useful at the moment.

One: a wolvish Jacob didn't like her to fear or flee.

Two: there was something about her neck.

Biting her lip so hard that she danced on drawing blood, Bella dusted off her hand and then snaked it up to push the rest of her messy hair over her shoulder. The wind helped, tugging it away like a kite. Letting her eyes flutter closed, she expelled her breath along with her stress and tipped her head, baring her neck like she'd innately done each time in Jacob's human arms.

It was the right decision.

That sound instantly shifted cadence, softening like it had been smoothed out by the wind. The quiet toss of sand whispered closer and then a warm voluminous cloud of warmth billowed over her cheek and neck, to be quickly jerked back in a cooling inhale.

Bella couldn't help but smile as a wet nose pressed right under her jaw while she held immaculately still. That soft rumbling purr seeped in to soften her bones.

Like when Jacob had touched her, her muscles instantly relaxed like the time she'd been given an intravenous sedative for that compound fracture in 5th grade and the last of her anxiety leaked out in a giggle.

The cool prodding snout was quickly snatched away.

Popping open one eyes she wrinkled her nose with her grin. "Hey," she greeted in a whisper.

A huge hot tongue immediately lapped up the side of her face, catching her eyelashes in its assault.

"Ew," Bella squawked, bringing up her hands to wipe over the slobber and ending up with a face of gooey sandpaper. While she spluttered and slapped at the mess, the wolf took meticulous snuffling inventory of her body with his butting muzzle.

Finally blinking her eyes back open, she again pushed her flyaway hair back from her face and found a massive wolf head watching her, frozen mid-snuffle at her hip.

"That was gross," Bella mumbled, putting herself at ease with the babble. Warily, she turned herself a little more toward the beast, uncurling and stretching her legs out in the sand.

"Can I touch you?" she asked with a raise of her brow. "I mean it's only fair, right?"

The wolf blinked at her again with those solemn eyes… like he didn't understand.

Twisting her mouth with an indecisive sniffle, she slowly stretched out her hand and the animal's gaze snapped to the movement. The giant didn't move though, nor did that soft sound stop its scurry. Gently, reverently, she reached out to that shiny mahogany snout and her fingers ghosted up the cowlicked fur on the bridge of his nose.

With a heaving sigh, the beast's entire body dropped to the sand like it was a marionette who's strings had been cut. Bella smiled and smoothed her palm over the longer fur at his brow. His head - as mammoth as the rest of him - settled down beside her in the sand.

Bella smiled and scooched closer as her hand traced the sleek noble lines of the animal's face. This wolf was far too regal for playful coddling and gruff scratching (like she might automatically revert to with a dog) and instead Bella found herself delicately tracing the fingers of one hand over the wiry fur. Caressing, cherishing, relishing… like she would if she were soothing Jacob's brow.

_This__…was Jacob._

The surrealism of it all slapped her across her face and her hand froze, with a gasp.

The wolf's ears bunched up curiously and he pushed his head closer into her thigh. His body shuffled behind her and she felt warm fur curl around her back. She glanced to the other side and saw his long muscular body stretched out in a crouch, his tail tucked around his paws.

Bella leaned tentatively back against his neck, nestled in the crook of his massive shoulder beside a paw the size of a dinner plate. Nestled against his coarse wild pelt, she could feel the cagey tension vibrating in his musculature, even curled up as he was at apparent rest.

Billy's words viscerally floated through her mind in a jumbled poignant knot that took her breath away: _"There's an animal that shares his soul now and that's a might frightening thing, I expect. __ He'd go from a kid who loves cars and rock music to a man who has to kill. _Instinct is a powerful thing and the wolf is fierce because a warrior needs to be to protect his tribe."

"Oh, Jacob," she whispered, turning her cheek into that stiff chocolate fur as tears sprang to her eyes.

A soft filament whine threaded around her heart as the wolf curled his head tighter around her body, resting just the edge of his heavy muzzle carefully against her leg.

"What are we going to do?" she choked, as her hand slipped blindly over his snout.

The wolf's tongue darted out to tickle her fingers.

"I don't know what to do, Jake," she continued, wiping her face back and forth over his fur and leaving a trail of silent sorrow. "It hurts," she breathed, all of her innermost feelings leaking out in thoughtless words to the beast. "It hurts _so bad,_ Jake. I know you don't mean to, but it hurts to see you hurt." She pressed her face deep in the thick pelt and drew in a breath of his musky-sweet scent. It was nothing like an animal at all but fragrant like amber and sandalwood, dusky forests and ancient secrets.

"I can't stand that you won't let me help, Jake," she mumbled into the fur, the words percolating over her accelerating sobs. "I just… I don't know what to do," she lamented as she sat up, her palms finding her face to try in vain to stop her heart from bleeding from her eyes.

The wolf picked his head up correspondingly, another whine leaking right beside her ear, but she didn't have the strength to look. Her own misery was caving in around her.

"I feel so helpless and I…I _miss_ you. I miss you so much I can't stand it. I've never felt so… so _alone_," she wailed quietly, despair making the words crumble.

Collapsing over her thighs, she pressed her hands against her face like it was a wound and she was trying to staunch the flow, while her breath limped on with hiccupping gasps.

She didn't even notice the muffled grunt behind her, nor the undulating heat coursing over her back followed by the whisper of cloth. But when a very human head bowed down against her shoulder blades, Bella froze.

Her hitching breath cantered on several moments more, as a large warm arm slithered around her middle like a serpent, slowly constricting and pulling her backward across the sand.

Bella's hand snapped down over that muscled forearm, her fingers curling desperately around the elbow lest it be snatched away again. Blinking rapidly, she watched as long bare legs slipped down either side of hers, digging trenches in the sand that pushed it against the leg of her jeans.

"I'm sorry, Bells," the words were soft and somber and could have been cut from the storm clouds thickening the sky.

Bella clutched fiercely to that elbow like it was a life preserver, not trusting her voice to speak. In one efficient gesture, Jacob had gathered all the pulverized pieces back together in that strong arm and she was afraid if he removed it again, she'd simply crumble. Her breath panted shallowly over her lips as she tried to not move a muscle.

"Shh," Jacob's croon shimmered down her spine along with a shudder that left her boneless in its wake.

Bella drew in a deep breath and released it slowly through puckered lips, relaxing back against the press of his forehead.

"You changed your shampoo," he mused in a murmur.

Bella sniffed. "Everyone was saying I stunk."

Jacob stiffened, abruptly lifting his head. "Who!" The word sounded like it was ground by his molars.

Bella clasped tighter to his arm. "I saw Leah at the store," she said in a quiet little voice.

Jacob laughed bitterly, but his head slowly fell back to her shoulder blades. "Leah hates everyone right now," he hissed. "But especially me."

Bella wanted to ask why, but more than that she wanted him to keep holding her. To keep breathing along with her, their hearts marching along side by side.

She put all questions aside, and let the soft tumble of waves smooth away everything else while she rode the slow undulating troughs of his breath and reveled in the touch of his skin.

Just this: Jake n' Bells on the beach.

Savoring the moment, she looked down the stretch of their legs, grossly mismatched in the sand: her comparatively petite ones clothed in jeans and his sticking out from his shorts, athletically defined even at rest with masculine hairs dusting over the smooth tawny skin. His frame was so much larger now, his arm wrapped around her waist and his fingers fluttered over her spine. It was then that she realized just how _much_ Jacob had grown - along with how physical toiling it must have been.

"You're huge," she whispered with a cavernous awe. She held up her hand from her thigh in petition. "Lemme see your hand."

Jacob shifted behind her, lifting his head and propping his chin on her shoulder. He shook his large sandy hand and then wiped it against his shorts, holding it up to mirror hers.

Smiling sadly she leaned her cheek into his stubbly jaw and she slowly brought each finger tip to touch his as he cupped his hand to accommodate her diminutive size. But even larger, Jacob's hands were still the same.

Bella had always loved Jacob's hands - she loved watching them jerk a wrench …or carve wood with such nimble precision …or comfort so tenderly. As usual, his nails were short and dirty, the knuckles rugged and fingertips calloused: they were competent, sensitive and strong.

Like Jacob himself.

Bella dragged the pads of her fingers down his. He slowly splayed his hand out with the movement until she was pressing her palm to his. She gasped quietly in awe as the same strange mesmerizing energy sparkled down her arm, infusing her bones with warmth.

Jacob sniffled stuffily and turned his head, resting his cheek heavily against her shoulder. "Everything's so fucked up, Bells," he whispered - barely audible above the waves.

Bella's breath caught in her throat. These were the first words his heart had really spoken to her and they were a precious gift that needed to be handled with care. Her eyes darted back and forth as her mind searched for traction.

"Then let's un-fuck it up," she said quietly, using humor as a jack to help lift his load.

Jacob sniffed a sad laugh. "You said 'fuck.'"

Bella smiled, as he curled the top two joints of his fingers idly down over hers. "Not _everything's_ messed up, Jake," she continued. She wiggled her fingers between his so their hands were threaded.

"Maybe we just gotta go back to what we know and work from there?" she ventured, squeezing his hand. "Jake n' Bells on the beach?"

Jacob propped his chin on her shoulder again, coughing a bitter laugh by her ear - it was an ugly sound that hurt her deep in her gut. "Does _this_," he held up their clasped hands meaningfully. "Does this feel the _same_?"

_It didn't. _

It really, _really_ didn't… and she was trying so very hard to ignore that heated heavy feeling that crouched in her abdomen and made her eyes feel like they were floating in her head.

He released her hand brusquely with a huff… and started pulling away.

Bella desperately gripped his arm around her stomach. "It feels… _different_, but not bad," she hastened. "It's just… m-more?" she stammered uncomfortably.

Jacob collapsed limply back against her like he'd been swimming upstream for miles and was exhausted. Bella knew the feeling.

Worrying her lip, she slipped her hand back over his where it had fallen to his thigh. She traced over his range of knuckles for a moment, noting the subtle tremor in his hand.

"Is it because of the wolf?" she asked hesitantly.

Jacob nodded silently against her and she heard his labored swallow.

Bella cleared her throat, hoping to push her heart back down into her chest. It would make sense that such an astonishing physical transformation was accompanied by all kinds of surging hormones- being the science geek she was, she'd been thinking about the biological aspects quite a bit this week. But somehow she didn't know if she could handle this particular hypothesis that had plagued her all week:

"So it's like this with _all_ _girls_?" she asked in a tight whisper. The words viscerally burned her tongue - it was an odd sensation.

Jacob's head jerked up. "No!" he rasped in shock as his hand turned over and grasped hers like a steel trap. "No," his voice softened back to a murmur by her ear. "No one else."

Stunned, Bella blinked for a moment while her heart hummed in pleasure.

"It's only you, Bells," Jacob whispered, turned into her neck and placing the most delicate brush of his lips over her pulse to punctuate his words.

It was intended to be a chaste and loving kiss only, but it infused her blood with flame. Bella's eyelids fluttered closed as her racing heart deftly pulled her under.

Apparently it had a similar effect on him to, because his lips pressed again to her neck, and then again...

With monumental effort, Bella sat up a bit more, subtly pulling away.

"Sorry," Jacob mumbled, flopping his forehead against her shoulder in chagrin.

"Um, right there with ya," she muttered out of the side of her mouth.

Jacob chuckled softly - and it was quite possibly the most beautiful sound she'd ever heard in her life. And just that little victory won her a windfall of hope. "So…" she said with determination, twisting around and pulling her feet under her. "Some stuff is kinda different-…"

The words died on her lips as her eyes raised to the bare chest merely a foot away. It felt like every synapse in her body started firing at the same time, instantly flooding her brain with sheer chaotic lust.

Flawless melted caramel was poured over musculature that was defined by a lithe but powerful grace. Massive shoulders were cinched by an exquisite collar bone and swept into plains of two smooth pecs which emptied into a rolling sea of abs. As much as it was an undeniable weapon, Jacob's body was a work of art.

He cleared his throat softly, and Bella realized she was just staring, like a slack-jawed fool. Her eyes darted up to his as a rush of heat charged to her cheeks.

Funny thing was, Jacob didn't look to be faring much better. She had always been able to read him pretty well - up until recently - but even his new-found stoicism couldn't hide the fact he was waging a war behind those hooded eyes. She watched his Adam's apple bob with a slow swallow.

Bella licked her lips and he flinched like she'd pinched him. "This thing is kinda..." she worried her lip nervously. "um.._distracting_."

"Yeah," he croaked, his eyes dipping down and getting stuck.

Blinking, she followed his gaze to find her nipples standing proudly at chilly attention in her little skimpy tank top. She hastily snapped her arms along with her flannel over her chest and hung her head.

"We're more than this," she hissed, frustration bursting out in lament. "We had _more_ than this, Jake!" she cried, squeezing her eyes closed on more traitor tears of confusion. She felt them roll shamelessly down her cheeks as she tucked her head.

There was a soft shuffling in the sand. "C'mere, honey," his words were cut from butter as those warm arms wrapped her in respite and he pulled her to his chest.

Sniffling miserably she nuzzled into his heated skin as he laid back with her held gingerly in his arms like she was made of the most fragile of glass. But as he pulled her down against his shoulder, she gasped, feeling the provocative evidence of his arousal pressing into her stomach like a taunt.

"This isn't going to work, is it?" he muttered dryly.

"Uhn-uh," she choked.

And suddenly she was being rolled onto her back in the sand. Bella opened her eyes to see Jacob decorously straightening her flannel over her chest as he stretched out on his side beside her. He propped his head in his hand and gave her squinting grimace.

This angle this was much better: away from other physical distractions, she could get lost in those infinite eyes - they were like looking straight up in the sky at midnight.

"You look tired," he whispered, brushing his knuckles over her cheek. Bella's eyelids fluttered at the palpable tenderness - only Jacob had a touch like this.

She opened her eyes again and brought her hand up to cup his jaw. "So do you," she mouthed silently.

His lips lifted in a slow wry smile, his gaze buried deep in her eyes.

"But you're still there, Jake," she whispered, tracing her finger over a silky brow. "I see you."

Jacob sniffed disparagingly. "Even under all this shit?" His hand flicked dismissively down his body.

"It's some pretty fine shit," she quipped with a raise of her brow.

He barked a laugh and she saw just a glimmer of that old sunshine flash across the new hard lines of his face.

"There," she said quickly and he arched a brow. "Whatta we gotta do to get _that_ back?"

His face darkened in an instant and his hand whipped up to rake through his hair. "I _can't_, Bella," he ground out squeezing his eyes shut. "I _can't_ be like that anymore." His eyes popped back open - hard, angry and sad somehow at the same time. "They need me to be strong. They-.."

"Shh," she brought her finger up to his lips and he froze. "Okaay," she crooned, drawing out the word in angora as his eyes snapped back down to hers. She tentatively lowered her fingers and rested them against his collar bone. "Okay, so with _them_, it's gotta be different. I understand-…"

"No," he hissed. "You _don't_ …there's shit you still don't know."

Bella nodded solicitously. "I don't _need_ to get it all now, Jake," she said quietly. "It's not about _them_, it's about_ us_… and you always said 'you and me' was as easy as breathing, remember?"

"It _was_," he bit out.

"It still is," Bella smiled hesitantly. "Or it can be. Right now _us_ is just Jake n' Bells on the beach… breathing. That's it… "

Jacob grimaced, his head flopping forward.

_Us. _Tied up in that single word was the essence of who they both were and had always been. Over this last year fate's fist had punched right into the core of their relationship and ripped out its heart, battered but beating. They'd both been hemorrhaging for far too long. The past might be irrevocable, but the present was stretched out beside her in the sand. And she just couldn't imagine a future without it.

Bella's fingers slipped to Jacob's chin and tenderly urged it up. His gaze was aching and brow furrowed under the sheer weight of all that burdened and battled in his soul.

Bella's heart flipped unhappily in her chest. "Just for a sec, kay?" she murmured, offering a sad smile. "Close your eyes."

Jacob sniffed, rolling them sarcastically in a visible bid to submerge his angst under cheeky dominion.

"C'mon," she chided, lightening her expression in a smirk.

When he opened his mouth to protest, she clapped her hand over his eyes comically. "Do it for me."

Jacob's mouth snapped shut in petulant resignation. She peeked between her fingers but he obediently kept his eyes closed as he settled his shoulders with a huff.

Bella lowered her hand. "Jake n' Bells," she whispered dramatically. "Breathing…"

"This is stupid," he muttered.

"Mm hmm," she agreed easily. "Maybe you forgot, but we're pretty stupid sometimes."

Jacob's lips quirked with his amused sniff.

Theatrically exaggerating deep breaths for his benefit, she watched his face melt into soft smile at her expense.

Bella smiled along with him anyway as her fingers caressed soothingly down his cheek. "Don't move," she whispered as she pushed up one elbow.

"What?"

"Shh… Jake n' Bells," she intoned again. She could tell he was about to open his eyes, so Bella went straight for the kill.

Popping up, she placed a bright smacking kiss square on his mouth and then flopped back down before her lips could even register how much they tingled and rebel at the retreat.

Jacob's eyes blinked open in surprise.

Chewing on the inside of her lip, Bella's eyes slipped nervously off to the side as heat rushed to her cheeks. "I always wanted to do that," she whispered. Her hand balled up uncomfortably and pressed against her sternum.

"Yeah?" Jacob's voice was soft and dusky.

Bella's eyes ventured back to his and what she saw made her uncertainty evaporate in a hesitant smile. All the crusty defensiveness and oozing pain in his eyes had softened to a supple ebony that inflated her heart with a glance.

Holding her gaze, his warm hand slipped around her fist and gently worked it open to interlace his fingers with hers. "What was that for?" he breathed, his mouth flirting with a smile.

"Well," Bella swallowed, bringing their clasped hands down to the hollow of her throat. "I wanted you to know that I'd thought about that…"

"Is that so," Jacob murmured, quirking a sly brow as he scooted closer in the sand, rearranging his cheek on his palm.

Bella smothered her smile. "Y'know… before the rest of this shit." With her free hand, she gestured flippantly at the impressive body stretched out beside her.

Jacob's face cracked in half with something pretty damn close to one of his old sunny smiles and her breath stuttered in her throat.

"You're pretty fucking sneaky, y'know that Bells?" The words were light and teasing, but Jacob's eyes had congealed in an inky intensity that seemed at odds with the way they flitted restlessly over her face.

Swallowing audibly, he released her fingers and his hand slipped up to rescue her lashes from a stray wisp of hair. He smoothed it back from her face with a cherishing palm.

Bella was mesmerized. His expression was utterly unguarded and present; an intimate glimpse into the sublime seas of his soul.

"I thought about it too," he mouthed, the words cut from a breath in the back of his throat. He dusted some sand from her cheek with his fingertips as his gaze again found hers. And rested… finally his eyes rested.

"Yeah?" she whispered over the staccato of her heart.

Jacob nodded slowly as his fingers continued to ghost over her cheekbone. The tender brush of his touch made Bella's eyes roll under fluttering lashes.

His gaze slipped free from hers and trailed lazily down her face to her mouth. Licking his lips, he slowly lowered his head toward hers while every fiber of her being quivered with anticipation.

"But it was more like this…" the words were no more than his breath over her lips.

Before Jacob kissed her.

Warm rose petal silk, sweet and fragrant, gathered her heart in a tender caress. Luxuriantly slow and sensual, his moist lips played over hers with a sultry patience that demanded nothing yet gave everything at the same time.

A soft gasp of ecstasy escaped as her body rose like the tide.

Immediately Jacob pulled away, sucking a harsh breath through his nose.

"Fuck…" he gasped, leaning his forehead against hers. "This is so _hard_."

Bella blinked soundly, immediately sobered into sentience by the hoarse anguish in his whisper. Confused, her hand slipped soothingly to his clenched jaw.

Tipping her head up, Bella rubbed her nose back and forth against his. "What's so hard about this, Jacob?" she asked quietly.

"The wolf," he choked, pulling back and staring at her with aching eyes. "The wolf _pushes_…"

Her eyes paced between his while her fingers idly traced his jaw, trying to understand. "He's not the only one," she suggested with a wry little smile. With a lift of her brow, she tried to pull him back down for another taste of those narcotic lips.

"No." The word was expelled on a harsh breath as he jerked back. "Bella, there's still a bunch of shit you don't know."

Bella's brow furrowed as dread curled, icy and leaden in her gut. "That's okay-…"

"No…" he repeated, flopping onto his back.

Bella's hand dropped to her chest.

"There's stuff about this," he gestured between them. "About my fucking life." Jacob shoved a hand through his hair as his eyes flitted over the storm clouds overhead. "_Fuck_, I don't want you all tangled up in my shit," he muttered to the sky.

Concerned, Bella sat up on her elbow. "I already am," she countered, her concerned gaze washing over his anguish.

Jacob turned toward her, his face hardening in regret. "You deserve better, Bells," he spat, self-derision twisting the words snide.

Bella barked an incredulous laugh. "And _you_ know what's best for me," she snorted sarcastically. "You really _are_ a man now, huh Jake?"

Jacob's brow shot up at her audacity.

She gave him a cheeky grin.

With a roll of his eyes, he sighed, "Bells, you don't-…"

"Tell me," she interrupted curtly, sitting up and idly dusting off the sand. "Just tell me everything and let me decide."

Jacob congealed slowly up from the sand with the ripple of muscle, and Bella's gaze blinked down between them, disconcerted by her body's reaction.

"Bells…" his voice was soft.

She looked back up to his searching eyes.

"Tell me," she whispered.

Licking his lips, his mouth opened but the words froze in the back of his throat …

Suddenly Jacob's entire body stiffened like he'd been electrocuted. "MOTHER FUCKER!" he bellowed.

The adrenaline hadn't even reached her brain by the time she was being whipped off the sand by massive arms.

And Jacob was sprinting.

Finally her heart lunged into motion from where it had simply surrendered in shock. Her shaking arms wrapped around Jacob's neck as he ran, eerily silent. His impossibly smooth gait rolled and undulated, barely jostling her as it rapidly devoured the beach toward the parking area.

"J-Jacob… w-what?" she quavered fearfully, looking for some sort of clue as scenery flashed by in her periphery.

But gone was any trace of the old Jacob she'd glimpsed just moments ago. His face had hardened into dark severe lines and his eyes were intense and seemed oddly trained in the distance like he was watching something play in his mind's eye.

A distant howl threaded the heavy grey clouds and sent a reflexive shudder through Bella's body.

It was followed by another baying cry …and another.

"Fucking SHIT!" Jacob growled, the human words more a feral vibration in his chest.

Battling rising hysteria, Bella turned her face into his neck and clung to him in sheer panic.

"The enemy's on our lands," he bit out.

"E-enemy," she whimpered into his skin.

"Leech," he spat the word like venom. "I gotta -… EMBRY!" he bellowed like a sonic boom.

Bella's hand released his neck to clap automatically over one ear.

"Where are they?" she heard Embry's voice call over the sound of her truck's engine idling. It sounded close and getting closer by the second.

Opening her eyes she turned to see that they were now sprinting effortlessly up the dune toward the parking area.

Embry stood beside her truck dressed in a pair of cutoffs and a grim frown.

"Don't fucking worry about _anything_," Jacob snarled, lurching to a stop right in front of him. "Except getting her to Emily's! _Then_ I'll fill you in."

Bella clung all the fiercer to Jacob's neck as her eyes darted between the two men. Her brain was flooded with so much burning adrenaline she could barely think straight.

"What about Sam?" Embry's question was as terse as his face.

"She's …" Jacob glanced down at Bella with a swallow. "She's an imprint. Sam's wolf will know - he'll protect her."

Bella was suddenly being shoved toward Embry's arms.

"But _you're _a different story," Jacob conceded, darkly. "Watch it."

For a moment, Bella was sandwiched between two burning chests. Jacob's arms tightened imperceptibly around her as he stared, hard and hooded at his friend.

Bella's gaze darted to Embry in confusion. His eyes were lowered, his neck subtly tipped to the side. "I got 'er Jake," he murmured quietly.

Eyes narrowed threateningly, Jacob's nose wrinkled as his lips curled back viciously from his teeth.

"Bella, he needs to go," Embry breathed in her ear, his voice taut and pleading. "Tell him."

Something arcane and instinctual in her being understood, even if her brain felt like it was swollen and sluggish. Her arms immediately slipped from around Jacob's neck.

"Go, Jake," she whispered, ignoring the terror coiling in her stomach.

Jacob's eyes snapped cagily down to her lips.

"Go," Bella nodded soberly. "He'll keep me safe," she said a little firmer as her arm hesitantly looped over Embry's shoulder in a show of confidence she wasn't feeling. Even though their scorching skin felt the same temperature… like with Eric, it couldn't feel more _wrong_.

Jacob's nostrils were flaring rhythmically as his gaze darted over her face.

"Please," she breathed.

Finally his arms fell back to his sides at the same time Embry took huge two lightning steps back. Just out of reach.

"Tell her whatever she needs to know," Jacob rasped.

"Jake..." Bella whispered. "Be careful."

Jacob's obsidian eyes locked silently with her own, fierce, wild. And then they burst into flame.

Without a word, he whipped around and his body poured into a liquid crouch. Uncoiling like a spring, he vaulted into the air in an impossibly high arc. At its apex, his muscular body exploded into a huge russet wolf while shreds cloth slithered down to the ground.

"Jake!" she quavered, gripping Embry's neck and craning around to watch the wolf land on four paws forty feet away and lunge into a blurred frenetic gallop.

She'd _known_ he was a shapeshifter, but to see it happen before her eyes made the bottom drop out of her heart.

And also made it all chillingly real: Jacob was a _wolf_… and right now… right this very moment… he was going to battle.

To protect her.

Bella bit her lip on a hiccupping sob.

"I got you, sweetheart," Embry murmured soothingly as he hastened toward the truck.

In the distance an earsplitting howl shattered the overcast afternoon and was answered by a chorus of keening cries intertwined in response.

Abruptly they were snipped by silence as if they'd been shorn.

Bella sucked in a sharp breath, her eyes wildly panning the darkening forest that met the beach.

Embry reached for the passenger door of the truck, facilely cradling her in one arm while he pulled it open.

Finally Bella met his gaze with eyes that flashed with fear and fury and bit out her demand from a clenched jaw:

"Tell. Me. Everything."

'

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'

Review if you like.


	8. Falling

_A long chapter full of angst and action, I'm using the dual perspective again to jerk you around. I think the emotions run the gamut - so strap in. _

_Thanks to Tayjayfan for the preread._

'

_As always, thanks so much for reading and I hope you enjoy._

_'_

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'

**Falls on Me** by Fuel_ (I really like this song for this point of the story)_

I've seen you hanging round  
This darkness where I'm bound  
And this black hole I've dug for me  
And silently within  
With hands touching skin  
The shock breaks my disease  
And I can breathe

And all of your weight  
All you dream  
Falls on me it falls on me  
And your beautiful sky  
The light you bring  
Falls on me it falls on me

Your faith like the pain  
Draws me in again  
She washes all my wounds for me  
The darkness in my veins

I never could explain  
And I wonder if you ever see  
Will you still believe?

Am I that strong  
To carry on?  
I might change your life  
I might save my world  
Could you save me?

'

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**Chapter 8 - Falling**

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'

There was never enough time. Not for everything.

Embry murmured as much as his hand yanked the transmission into reverse and the truck shuddered under the terse demand of his fist.

Bella pulled her knees to her chest as she leaned her shoulder against the door. Her eyes hadn't given up their vain attempt to catch a glimpse of that imposing wolf, though her mind certainly knew better. Before the animal had streaked into the forest like a shadow, she'd seen the look in Jacob's eyes and, truthfully, it had frightened her. Grim and ruthless, he was a man on a dire mission.

A man who'd rather die than fail.

Shuddering, Bella turned back to Embry who was jerking the truck around the hairpin turns above the bluffs with casual finesse, like his mind was someplace else entirely. She supposed it was.

Embry cut his eyes over to her and licked his lips apprehensively - a shocking contrast to the intensity lining his face. He had always been a quiet, easy-going kind of guy, and under different circumstances she might have found it amusing that her questions intimidated him the most.

Taking a deep breath, Bella pulled her knees tighter to her chest and offered him a place to begin. "Who's on your lands?" she whispered. "Do you know, Emb?"

"Leeches," Embry spat automatically, gripping the wheel tighter as his eyes burned a hole through the windshield.

"Vampires?" Bella checked.

He nodded once.

Bella couldn't help the reflexive shudder that went through her body. She squeezed her knees tighter. "Do you know why-…?"

"There's been some kinda rogue bloodsucker who's been dancing across our lines," he hissed, bringing the words up from deep in his gut. "We _think_ it's one… might be two. Anyway, it killed those two people in Forks… but that's off our lands."

Bella's mind spun. Lands, lines… her brain scrabbled to put the pieces together. "You can't go off the Rez?"

Embry's eyes cut over to her nervously - oh, she could see there was so much more. "We _can_," he snorted, his lips hitching up on side with a flash of pride, "but there's the treaty."

"So, if there's the treaty, why are they killing?"

"It's _different_ leeches. The treaty's with another tribe of bloodsuckers that don't drink human," he sniffed as one nostril flared with his sneer. She'd never seen Embry look so bitter in his life - the expression was ground into that intrinsically kind face. "They just moved back last year - back to Forks."

"Vampires live in Forks?" Bella gasped.

At her tone, Embry glanced at her again, worry pulling at his brow. "_Outside_ of Forks - out in the woods," he soothed, returning his eyes to the road. "And _they're_ the reason we phased." That aberrant acid returned to his voice and burned.

"Huh?" Bella was confused.

Embry sighed heavily as he turned the wheel, hand over fist. "The wolf thing… the _gene_ gets… like, _jump-started_ when leeches are in the area. There haven't been wolves for two generations - not since Jake's great grandfather's Pack."

Bella drew in a long shaking breath, and tried to cut through all the emotion and confusion by focusing on something she understood: science. "So, it's like a latent gene and it's activated by this 'tribe'?"

Embry rolled his lips and nodded as he slammed the brakes at an intersection for a dawdling delivery truck and Bella's hand slapped to the side of the door to steady herself.

"So, if they left way back when…why did they come back?" she asked with a frown.

"No one knows," Embry barked a caustic laugh. "But the asses did."

Bella propped her chin on her knees, not sure where to go from here. Embry was obviously angry and it was so out of character that she didn't know what to do with it.

He glanced over at her as he gassed the truck again. "Sorry, Bella," he sighed. "Look, you know the stories, right? We don't know much more than that either and it's frustrating. Up to now, Jake's just tried to keep the treaty because he hates to break promises."

The statement went straight through her heart; he did. Jacob _hated _to break promises. And these stupid vampires were taking advantage of that and ruining the lives of her friends. There was a whole freaking world outside of Forks that they could live in, wasn't there?

"They should _leave_," she murmured hotly, defensive ire stoking a fire in her belly.

"He's starting to think the same thing," Embry sniffed appreciatively.

Trying to figure out all of this about treaties and vampires, tribes and boundaries, was beyond the scope of the very limited time at the moment. The way Embry was driving, they were only minutes away from town.

Her heart thumped dully in her chest and chose her next words for her. "Is he going to be okay?" Bella whispered.

"Jake?" He turned to her with a lift of his brow.

Bella nodded and rested her cheek against her knees.

Embry's face cracked in half with one of his old cashmere smiles. "He's _good_, Bella. Like _scary_ good."

Her lips softened sentimentally at his transparent devotion. In a flash of insight, she realized Embry wasn't referring to his best childhood friend anymore - he was speaking about his leader. Jacob's metamorphosis had transformed his friendships and bonds just as much. _This_ is why he'd said he couldn't be that sunny boy she'd known for the past 17 summers. The stalwart faith and admiration that sparkled in Embry's eyes was blatant evidence - they all looked up to him.

They all _needed_ to look up to him.

As that realization settled over her with the weight of God's honest truth, Bella let her legs slither to the ground and subtly squared her shoulders, in a conscious show of both confidence and strength. Just as they did, she both trusted and admired the man Jacob was trying to be and the least she could do was paint on a brave face in his honor.

Embry glanced several times at her and settled back against the seat himself. It was a silent conversation between them that could have taken hours with words.

"So, what do I need to know?" she came back quietly as she turned to face him and rested her head back against the seat with counterfeit ease.

Bella watched Embry's lashes flutter nervously as his mind desperately searched for traction. She knew him nearly as well as Jacob, and he'd never been good with words.

"What about Sam?" she prompted, her hand slipping over the seat to touch his thigh reassuringly.

Embry's hand slipped down from the wheel to cover it with a grateful squeeze. "Sam's crazy," he stated in a hollow whisper.

The words were so unexpected that her breath skidded to a halt.

Embry glanced at her with an apologetic grimace. "Sam imprinted on Emily-…"

"Sam Uley? Leah's Sam?" she asked quickly - searching for find context.

"Not anymore," he sighed with a rueful shake of his head. "He couldn't help it… When Leah's cousin Emily came down and he met her…." Embry's Adam's apple jerked with his swallow. "_Bam_."

Bella's breath had gone shallow, she was paying such close attention: Jacob had said she was an imprint too. She pulled her knee up on the seat between them, watching his face carefully. "Bam?" she asked lightly, trying to keep him going.

Embry drew in a deep breath as he turned brusquely down a side road, releasing her hand to jerk the wheel. "That's kinda how it goes the first time you see your imprint," he wrinkled his nose uncomfortably as he pulled onto an unpaved lane.

Bella's brow furrowed in confusion, as she absently glanced down the dark road that was covered over completely by trees.

"But Emily wouldn't have him," Embry continued. "I mean she's Leah's _cousin_...it was bad. And, well, to make a long story short, he lost it one day and phased."

Bella whipped back around, her eyes running over his profile.

"She was too close," he choked into the heavy silence of the cab.

"Did Emily get hurt, Emb?" Bella whispered, trying her best to soothe that palpable pain that had crept into the shadows of his face.

"Yeah," he croaked. "You'll see."

Bella drew in a breath as she nodded and returned her gaze to the road ahead.

"We're supposed to _protect_, Bella," he asserted abruptly - sounding like he was desperately pleading a case. "It's not supposed to happen like that. Sam…S-Sam didn't have anyone to help him control… he was oldest so he was first. Jake didn't finish the phase for a few more weeks."

Bella leaned toward him, her brow knitting at the anguish on his face. "I know, Emb," she whispered.

"It really tore Sam up." Embry met her eyes intensely. "The wolf goes into a kinda… _protective overdrive_ and he can't control it. It makes him nuts."

Bella thought about that feral, crazed look in Jacob's eyes when he stormed into Billy's house and suppressed her shudder. She could imagine it all a little too clearly.

"So he's kinda traumatized…like a war vet?" Bella offered, letting him know she understood.

"Yeah, but worse," Embry grimaced.

"But Jake thinks he'll protect _me_?" she asked, trying to draw him back to that sense of confidence that Jacob seemed to instill.

"Yeah," Embry whispered tensely as he clenched his jaw.

She could see it in his body language: Embry was ramping up for conflict. And Sam.

"But not you?" she prompted quietly.

Embry squinted at her. "I'm a threat."

"Why? Aren't you his … his Pack?"

"There's no _Pack _to Sam when he gets like this," Embry sucked in a breath. "He doesn't trust anyone. He won't hurt a human - but I'm not human anymore, so …."

"You're a threat?" Bella completed for him.

Embry flipped his hair out of his eyes. "Yeah."

"Why does he protect the imp-prints?" Bella's mouth stuttered uncomfortably over the word.

"That's something that runs _so deep_ in us," Embry breathed quietly, returning his eyes to the road.

Bella watched the way his lips pursed with his private thoughts.

"And _I'm_ an imprint, Emb?" she ventured.

"You are, Bella," he whispered - there was almost a reverence in the affirmation and it made her heart shiver in her chest. In that moment it truly hit her that Jacob - and Embry and even _Sam_, who she'd never really met - would protect her with their _lives. _Without so much as a second thought.

It was the most sobering realization of Bella's existence.

Her head fell back against the seat with the sheer magnitude of it. "Thanks, Emb," she whispered.

In her periphery, she saw Embry turn to her with one of his beautiful balmy smiles. "What for, Bella?"

"Protecting," she breathed with awe.

Embry's big hand slipped back over hers lying between them on the seat. "You're doing awesome with this shit, sweetheart."

Bella cut her eyes over to him with a smile. "I'm good with weird," she muttered.

"You calling me weird, Swan?" Embry winked as patted her hand and returned it to the wheel.

Bella rolled her eyes. "You haven't been paying attention if this is news to you, you dork."

Embry chuckled and his eyes again found the road. Even though his face had softened into a far more familiar smile, she could still feel the tension in the cab... in her own heart... in the way he drew in a slow steeling breath.

"Are we close?" Bella asked, her eyes panning to the driveways that were getting fewer and farther between.

"Yeah… another few minutes…" he murmured. "We're gonna park down the road a little. Just try to stay calm and get in the house fast."

Bella sat up a bit straighter as her stomach did a little unhappy flip at such ominous words. "Hey, there's one more thing I wanna know," she whispered, trying to take her mind off an eminent show-down with another huge wolf… and one who was decidedly bonkers at that.

"Sure," Embry choked stiffly.

Bella smiled at his familiar reticence. "I think I'm kinda getting it, but what exactly _is_ an imprint?"

Embry veritably squirmed in his seat. "Well, you should talk to Emily - get a girl's perspective," he hedged.

"C'mon, Emb," Bella huffed with a roll of her eyes. "SparkNotes version."

"Kay," Embry rearranged his hands on the wheel as he snuck a look her way. "Well, wolves mate for life, yeah?" he began, sitting up more in his seat as he trained his eyes carefully on the road. "So do we. Imprinting is the wolf choosing his-.." he paused and cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Ah, his mate."

Maybe Bella's heart just stopped in her chest. Suddenly, the air in the cab of the truck seemed a little too close. She'd certainly guessed that imprinting had some sexual connotation… but mating for _life_? Bella swallowed uncomfortably as her eyes incrementally widened with the implications.

Embry glanced at her nervously several times as he pulled the car off to the side of the road and cut the engine.

Embry licked his lips and the sound crackled through the quiet cab while Bella wrapped her arms around her middle and tried to breathe.

"When he saw you that day at your house, Jake's wolf chose you," he said quietly, turning toward her and watching her carefully.

Bella tried to blink out of her overwhelm. So his _wolf_ made him want her like that. What was _her_ excuse? No matter how hard she fought it, her cheeks were burning.

"And what about Jake?" she whispered hoarsely, simply unable to meet his eyes.

For several seconds - that felt like hours - the silence hung between them. A raindrop finally broke free from the dusk to spatter against the windshield of the truck and Bella flinched.

"Bella," Embry's voice was gentle, compelling.

She had no choice but to look up and meet his gaze.

Under the fringe of his silky hair, Embry's eyes were dark and caring as his lips curved in a subtle smile. "_Jake_ chose you a long time ago."

A soft breath was drawn over her lips by her heart inflating in her chest. Bella's eyes darted between his for a moment.

"You ready?" he asked quietly.

Jacob was born to be ready… even when he technically wasn't. Because there certainly could be _no worse time_ for this fucker to show up again on their lands.

Not only was Jacob distracted for the first time in his career as Alpha, there were only two of them: Quil was running so hard along their northern border that foam was spraying over his heaving sides while Jacob tore through the forest on a direct course for intercept. He'd had to Order the two new cubs - through their instinctual killing frenzy - to stay a safe distance from the fray. Twenty-something year old bodies or not, little Collin and Brady certainly weren't ready for _this_.

Not like Jacob.

'Paul,' Jacob snarled through the Pack mind. 'How long?'

'Eighteen, Chief,' he barked obediently, contrition coloring the words. Blurred scenery accompanied the thought. After Paul's spectacular hissy fit over the Order this afternoon, Jacob had sent their best offensive up to the lake north of Forks to investigate the newest murder with Jared. They were eighteen minutes and twenty-two miles too far.

Jacob cut off the connection as he again focused on what Quil was seeing: a demon masquerading as a black-skinned man, his inky dread locks strung with white shells and flapping behind him in a clacking blur.

'Fuck!' Quil's beast suddenly jerked to a stop.

'Shh…' Jacob soothed, as his own animal slowed to a trot and lifted his muzzle to the air. 'Something's not right, Q. Show me what you got.'

Jacob stretched his connection out through his Pack mate's senses. Quil's wolf was so agitated that his prey had once again disappeared, that his neurons were sizzling like detonating chord for TNT making the scenery around him jerk and glow like overexposed film. Jacob let his power leach over him to calm his flailing instinct as he tried to glean some kind of clue from Quil's position, concurrently using his own senses to sweep the forest physically around him. Quil had been flushing the parasite toward Jacob and they were now no more than a quarter mile away. He could see Quil down in the valley, but he also _should_ be able to see the leech…

It didn't make sense.

Quil might not be the best tracker, but he was the fastest of the Pack. Moments ago he'd been hot on the heels of the leech but as soon as his wolf had jumped the ravine, the demon had vanished like a ghost.

Jacob's hackles rose with his prickling intuition.

'Close your eyes,' Jacob crooned, imbuing the words with a subtle compulsion. Quil would never have questioned him, but they couldn't afford any hesitation right now.

Jacob's wolf chuffed softly as he lifted his own muzzle to the breeze. Unfortunately, it was blowing along the valley like a wind tunnel and siphoning the scents ahead out of reach.

But not so for Quil. _There_…

Quil's animal jerked at the whiff of cloying stench that played on the breeze, but Jacob held him fast under his command. 'Don't move,' he murmured, softening the bondage with words.

The subtle cacophony of errant thoughts silenced in the Pack mind as all the wolves turned rapt attention to what was unfolding before them.

'It's a trick,' Jacob breathed - to them, to himself - as all the pieces clicked into place from acumen and intuition.

Jacob's paws shuffled softly on the leaves as he strained his every sense. The forest around them held its breath; all living sound had muted in dread or deference for its supernatural sentries. A breeze breathed through the valley tossing the grey clouds and whispering over the leaves. The first raindrop of the coming storm fell to a leaf a hundred feet away.

_Drip_.

_Clack_.

Jacob's eyes popped open, burning a path straight down the valley on a precise trajectory calculated by both the scent captured by Quil's wolf and the telltale rattle of shells. The leech had moved - turning to the noise - and it cost him his game.

'Got you,' Jacob's hiss seared through the Pack mind like fire. Through the trees he could barely see the dark shadow of the monster, crouched on a branch like a gremlin above Quil's head.

'Open your eyes, but don't move,' Jacob commanded in a whisper as he watched eagerly with both his connection to Quill and his own eyes.

Quil's field of vision opened up to the darkening forest around him and an anticipant whimper slipped from his muzzle. 'I see him!' he called, the wolf's head snapping to the shadow of movement off his left flank.

The wolves tracked movement first, before scent, and Jacob realized the demon was somehow playing them; that spectral image was cast 100 yards away from the creature crouched like a gargoyle in the tree.

'He's getting away!' Quil shrilled, as his wolf swayed back and forth on his paws under the restraining Order.

'Idiot,' Paul snorted - having pieced together the game from Jacob's mind.

'Shut up!' Jacob bellowed. 'Get him, Quil!' He released his hold and the wolf tore off after the phantom while Jacob lunged low to the ground into a silent prowl after the beast clinging to the tree.

'When he disappears, double back and help me,' Jacob whispered, opening his mind and pouring out the details in images for Quil.

'Oohh, sure boss,' Quil sent back. Jacob had shamelessly used his Pack mate as a pawn but, as usual, good natured Quil didn't seem to mind.

'How long, Paul!' Jacob ground out, as he wove around tree trunks in a mercury slink. His muzzle was trained like an arrow on his prey as the rain fell down like pattering beaded curtains around him.

Up ahead, the demon had been fooled and was starting to stir - it leaped silently to another tree like a locust.

'Eight,' Paul panted.

'Make it five,' Jacob growled as he crouched low to the ground and then sprang up the tree, phasing at the summit of the thrust and making a mad grab for the creature.

Bella's high squeak of fear brought Jacob swiftly back down to the forest floor on his knees.

She'd promised herself she'd be brave, but the sight of that jet-black wolf barreling down the driveway with snapping jaws had shucked every last shred of steeling resolve from sheer terror.

Bella cowered into Embry's chest.

"Sam!" Embry roared in an imperious bass she'd never imagined possible from that tender mouth.

Bella opened her eyes to find herself facing the opposite direction, with Embry's body curled protectively around her. Outside the sheltering cocoon of quivering muscle, a growl continued to boil in the rain.

Her brain finally catching up, Bella tried to disengage herself but the steely muscles didn't budge an inch. "Emb," Bella whispered fearfully.

In the cab, Bella had made a conscious choice to trust Jacob implicitly in all this insanity, and he'd said _Embry_ was in the one in danger. She was going against every instinct she had.

"No, this is too -…" Embry panted, yanking her around again as jaws petulantly snapped at the air. "I'm gonna take you to Sue's."

"Embry," Bella urged, wishing her voice didn't quaver. "Jake said he wouldn't hurt me - we gotta listen."

Apparently it was the right thing to say. Slowly, Embry uncurled from around her, and Bella peeked around his heaving chest as the snarls settled down to growls. The wolf had similar eyes to Jacob's but the fierce feral yellow looked even more shocking set in the ebony.

They were trained intensely on her.

"Hey Sam," she rasped and then cleared her throat.

The animal tossed its head and started pacing back and forth. Gently disengaging herself from Embry's death grip, Bella stepped out from the safeguard of his body. The wolf stopped pacing and lifted his muzzle to the breeze.

"It's okay," she whispered soothingly, holding out a shaking hand.

The wolf chuffed and took a shimmying step toward her.

Glancing at Embry - who looked cocked and ready to lunge to her defense - Bella took several more hesitant steps toward the hulking beast.

It wasn't as big as Jacob's wolf, but with his head raised, he was still taller than her. With a snuffling breath, his licorice nose stretched down to touch the back of her knuckles.

"Hey there," Bella murmured senselessly again, as a hot tongue lapped over her hand. With a laugh, Bella ghosted a finger over his snout.

The wolf huffed again, slinking several steps closer as he started snuffling up her arm and over her hair. Squenching her face up, Bella's hands balled into fists at her shoulders as that cold wet nose poked into her neck, her cheek, her ear. But even though Sam was huge - and had scared her half to death - now he was nothing but gentle. So very gentle.

A soft whine leaked from his snout as he butted against her shoulder in petition.

Bella's eyes popped open and her fist uncurled to smooth over his big head. Again he prodded her toward the house like he was trying to herd a cub to his den. With another giggle, Bella complied, taking several steps down the driveway as Sam turned with her, putting his body conspicuously between her and Embry.

"It's okay, Emb," Bella called out over her shoulder as the animal continued to urge her on with nudges between her shoulder blades.

"Be careful, B-"

Embry's words were chewed into silence by violent barking snarls.

With a gasp, Bella whipped around to see the wolf lunging at Embry. His lightning leap barely evaded disaster.

"Embry!" Bella shrieked, as the animal surged forward again, and, with supernatural reflexes, Embry tried to roll out of the way. The beast's snapping jaws hit their mark on Embry's calf as he yanked it away and scrabbled back.

Bella didn't even think.

Whether it was some instinct, misplaced heroism, or simply the impulsive antics of a girl who'd always been fiercely protective of her friends, Bella stumbled forward and threw her arms around the wolf's neck as it was rearing back for another strike.

"Sam!" she shrieked, closing her eyes and holding on for dear life as the animal jerked in surprise.

Shockingly, those snarls silenced as if diffused merely by her touch, while the wolf carefully rearranged its stance so that it was wasn't tugging against her grasp.

Breath heaving, she fisted her hand more firmly in that that shaggy pelt, bringing it's shoulders just level with hers. An eye ventured open to find Embry sprawled in the driveway with an expression of open-mouthed shock.

She lifted her head a little more as her gaze darted down to the muzzle that was dipped low and peeled back from a silent snarl. The wolf's eyes were still trained threateningly on the man lying in the driveway.

Bella's gaze washed back over the crimson blood, shocking against Embry's caramel skin, and then met his eyes. "Are you okay?" she choked.

Embry blinked. He started to sit up and the animal growled low, the sound vibrating against her chest.

Bella tightened her grip. "Emb, your leg," Bella whimpered, her gaze again dropping to the gash on his calf. Strangely, it looked to be healing already - the rain was washing away the wound like it had only been painted on.

"It's just a scratch," he dismissed breathily as he sat up slowly this time. "We heal quick."

Bella released a sigh of relief that rustled through the thick black fur by her cheek.

While a warning growl continued to rumble in the wolf's chest, Embry incrementally unfolded to his feet.

"It's okay, Sam," she murmured, readjusting her hold on the beast.

"How did you -…?" Embry gaped, as his eyes ran over her in disbelief.

A distant mournful howl blissfully interrupted the need for answers Bella didn't have at the moment.

Sam's body tensed, his muzzle snapping up to the sky as Embry whipped around. "I gotta go," he gasped, glancing over his shoulder.

"I think I'm good, Emb," she breezed with more bravado than she was feeling at the moment with a huge black wolf held at bay in her pitiful little arms.

Embry nodded as his eyes darted nervously between her and the beast at her side. Without another word, he turned and jogged through the drizzling rain down the driveway.

As soon as he'd disappeared, the quivering muscles in the wolf's back stilled.

Thoughtlessly, Bella wiped the rain from her face on his pelt. "You wanna get out of the rain, Sam?" she whispered as her hands tentatively slipped from around its neck.

The animal chuffed and turned his big head to snuffle her.

Taking that as close to an affirmative as she was going to get, Bella kept her eyes trained on the beast as she turned toward the little house and wrapped her arms around her middle nervously. The rain continued to fall, soft tapping whispers gathering in her hair and playing a melody on the metal roof.

The wolf followed at her heel like a shadow, trotting at spry attention.

Drawing in a deep breath, Bella tried to expel some of the stress and confusion along with it. There was so much that was weighing on her poor adrenaline-soaked brain that she was amazed she had enough wit left to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Soon enough she was climbing the worn wooden steps to the porch, but the wolf didn't follow. He stopped at their foot, sitting down its haunches.

Bella glanced at her shadow with a smile. "Gonna wait here?" she asked lightly - talking was keeping her from breaking completely down.

The animal stared back with smoldering yellow eyes.

With a sniff, she shucked the water from her face and turned back around - suddenly noticing the two faces pressed against the front window. She recognized Claire and wiggled her fingers in greeting.

The front door opened slowly opened as she climbed up to the porch and a woman just a few years older than her peered guardedly out from behind the screen. This wasn't exactly the welcome she was hoping for.

But as her wide frightened eyes drifted past Bella to the wolf down in the yard, she suddenly realized the woman was wary because she was _afraid_. She was afraid of _Sam_.

As Bella crossed the rickety floorboards, the woman pushed the door open with a sweep of her arm. Beautiful, pregnant and horribly scared down one side her face, Bella met the woman's eyes with a hesitant smile.

"Hi Emily," she said quietly. "I'm Bella."

'She's safe,' Embry phased into the Pack mind with those words proffered on sigh of relief.

Jacob's stride didn't falter. Of course he'd watched the scene play out through Sam's eyes… with his heart in his throat. There had been nothing he could do - and it had been a sickening feeling. The Order worked only sporadically with Sam when he was like this, and only if Jacob were physically present to follow it up with force.

'We need you here _now_!' Jacob snarled - cutting through his own worry and self-derision with battle focus. He sent a mental summary of the last ten minutes to Embry as he pounded - muzzle in the air - after the leech, who was bounding from treetop to treetop.

They'd lost the crucial element of surprise due to Jacob's carelessness. His attention was always divided between five - and now seven - different thoughts and perspectives: like multiple cameras in one of the video games he'd used to play but all running at the same time in his head. It was a delicate and exhausting discipline on the best days for sure.

But now…

Now, having one trained on the girl who held his heart and soul in her eyes made it nearly impossible.

In that moment on his knees with every fiber of his being focused on his fearful imprint, it had taken every ounce of willpower not to turn tail and rush across the distance in order to swiftly ground Sam into oblivion.

And it had cost them the chase.

'But we got this fucker now,' Jacob reminded himself as a growl percolated in his belly in resonance. He couldn't afford a millisecond of regret or remorse. Not with five other sets of eyes looking on.

Never show weakness, especially if you already had.

Again.

'But Bella… did you see?' Embry continued on almost unconsciously. His mind was still trying to process what had just happened and it bled through his unfocused thoughts and into the Pack mind.

'I saw,' Jacob affirmed in a single clipped monotone that both acknowledged and ended the subject. He could feel the appreciation for Bella's guts and guile tugging _several_ wolves' focus off kilter - including Paul's. But instead of riling Jacob's animal, it made him preen.

_Their mate was brave and smart._

Jacob, the man, shut that shit down.

Nothing was as easy as the beast's simple instincts seemed to think it was. Right now, Bella was getting exactly what he'd alternately wanted and avoided like the plague: an unambiguous slice of his crazy-assed life in all its shit-hole glory. And a glimpse at her future if she chose him.

'Jared!' Jacob boomed, forcing his mind back to matters at hand.

'Kay, we're here,' he replied, the words undulating with his heaving breath even in his mind. He and Paul needed a moment to recover.

Paul snarled resentfully.

'Fucking seal the Cullen border!' Jacob loosed the edict in a boom that decimated any lingering attitude issues in its wake (and also gave them time to catch their breath since they were already there).

Jacob usually protected his own thoughts better - it was important particularly for Paul not to see the strategy and assessment below the surface in order to keep him malleable.

'Don't forget: fuck the visuals, go by scent and sound. I'm bringing him down in about two,' Jacob hissed with anticipant relish that stoked all their fires that much higher. 'Quil, Emb - flush 'em into the noose. But I want this one _alive_, Paul. Or whatever the fuck they are.'

From behind them, down the valley, a howl was loosed by one of the younger wolves who'd lost control to the vicarious thrill of the chase.

Jacob quickly jerked the rein back into his fist and the animal silenced like it had been choked. The only loose cannon on hunts used to be Sam - Paul kept his shit under control when it counted - but with the two new cubs it added a whole other layer of complexity to an already volatile mix. A difficult thing to do even at his best.

And to say Jacob was fighting distraction was the understatement of the fucking year. He was fighting a _war_ in his head.

He understood now just how fortuitous having Sam guard the imprints really was. It had soothed both Quil and Jared to have Sam stand as sentry for exercises or hunts and - since it had accomplished the goal he'd wanted - he hadn't really paid it any mind. But now he saw clearly how often glances were cast by both of them into the black wolf's mind. Because, now, Jacob was just as guilty.

Sam - in his neuroticism - had to visually connect with Emily at least every few minutes. Their house was on the outskirts of the Rez - only the Clearwaters lived farther toward shore - and therefore he was free to pace back and forth on the back porch of the house, glancing through the windows far more frequently that Jacob had realized. It was kind of like having a closed circuit security cam hardwired into his brain.

And when the scene was so absofuckinglutely captivating - as it was right now - it was simply impossible to ignore.

Especially right now: Bella was asking Emily about the imprint.

"If you accept him, it's a forever thing, Bella," Emily said quietly from where she was sitting at the small kitchen table. Claire was pretending to do her homework on one end, Kim was pulling out mugs from the cupboard and stealing glances over her shoulder.

Bella's hand stilled on the tea kettle, blinking at her reflection in the silver surface. There were grease spatters on the stainless steel and a black ring around the stove's heating element where a brillo pad had left scratches on the porcelain. These were the kind of details that were far more comforting than what had just been confirmed by Sam's imprint. She'd thought maybe Embry had somehow gotten it wrong.

Swallowing softly, Bella let the kettle fall to the coiling element and reached up and turned the burner to high. The knob was sticky - Emily could use some help cleaning, but it wasn't such a surprise. She should be devoting her time to that amazing art Bella had been shown only moments ago.

_Focus Bella. _Her mind was trying to take her down _any_ other well-worn path but the one laid before her.

Biting her lip, Bella turned around and leaned on the counter. "So his wolf picks you and then you have to agree?" she asked, her mind fumbling to paste together a coherent thought with the clippings gathered over this last week.

Emily nodded sagely.

"And you all agreed?" she asked quietly, her gaze washing over each of the girls in turn. "The girls" were kind and welcoming (once she'd gotten in the house), but Bella was good at observing. It was hard to ignore the somber anxiety that hung over the group like a fog. It was only natural with their boys out there up against something that shouldn't exist outside nightmares. It was just important to Bella that they'd _chosen_ this life.

"Quil's cute," Claire giggled from the table, making Bella smile at both her sappy smile and how much she reminded her of Quil in her spirited simplicity.

"I've been in love with Jared since fourth grade," Kim rejoined.

Bella's gaze settled on Emily without even thinking about it. The woman's eyes fell to her lap as she nervously pushed her hair behind the ear of her unblemished side, hiding the scars behind a sleek ebony curtain. "I know you think I'm crazy..." she laughed nervously, "but I did too."

The pain in her voice drew Bella across the room like a magnet. "I don't think you're crazy," she frowned. Emily looked up, as Bella pulled up a chair beside her and leaned forward over her thighs, propping her elbows on her knees.

Emily searched her eyes and then continued. "I didn't at first… I mean, he was my cousin's fiancé!" she barked a bitter laugh and her gaze again fell to her lap where she was wringing her hands. "But after all this-…" one hand flicked up toward her face. "Sam was so _broken_."

Emily sucked in a shaking breath. "So was I, and it just…" she pressed her lips together as she shook her head slowly back and forth. "It just _happened_."

Bella couldn't stand it anymore. Her hand slipped out to cover one of Emily's, squeezing gently.

The woman looked back up with tears in her eyes. "I mean, my cousin thinks I'm a whore…" she sniffed bitterly. "The whole Rez, really."

"_Almost_ but not everyone, Em," Claire piped up. "The _Council_ doesn't…"

At her well-meaning but unflattering defense, Emily shot her an indulgent smile. She returned her gaze to Bella.

"I'm twenty years old and pregnant," Emily's hand fell tenderly to her rounding belly. "And I'm marrying a man who scares me to death half the time." She glanced across the kitchen.

Bella followed her gaze to see a huge wolf's head taking up the entire window over the sink - his worried yellow eyes were locked myopically on his imprint.

Concerned, Bella returned to Emily's gaze. "You're afraid of Sam?"

"Only when he's like this," she grimaced. "When he's a _man,_ he's kind, so patient… loving. I mean in just a year he's turned into the best friend I've ever had."

Bella's brow shot up in surprise.

"So even with all this," she tipped her face to the side meaningfully, "All this craziness," She heaved a sigh as her gaze darted from one girl to the other. "I don't regret choosing him." She returned to Bella's gaze and rolled her lips. "I mean that's crazy, isn't it?"

Bella shook her head slowly, soothingly squeezing her hand.

"But do you understand?" Emily asked earnestly, her eyes darting intently between Bella's.

Such an impassioned question made Bella turn inward searching for empathy. Sure it _sounded_ crazy, but what part of any of this _wasn't_?

Truthfully, the sick thing was, even after the way Jacob treated her this last year - maybe especially this last week - she was ready to forgive him in a heartbeat too. She knew in her heart that he was trying his best, so she was willing to push through her hurt feelings and try to trust him enough to figure the rest of this stuff out. The alternative simply hurt too much.

She _needed_ him.

No, it wasn't just need...

_Love_.

Bella _loved_ him.

Not just the BFF- warm-'n-cozy-love of the past, but the type that reached in an wrapped its fist around her heart and squeezed it when he was hurting or he was running away. It was the kind that grew in her soul like another being, stretching the very fabric of who she was with a delicious ache. It made her crave his eyes, hunger for his voice, and yearn to crawl into his skin. It overran the bounds of her chest and trickled down into her belly, stoking embers of unnamable want.

And it was a million times more frightening that wolves or vampires or magic.

Bella _did_ understand. And that was a very scary thing.

The tea kettle launched into a warbling whistle from the stove and it brought her back to the present.

Bella cleared her throat uncomfortably, her gaze falling to their clasped hands. "I don't think you're crazy, Emily," she whispered, knowing the woman needed more comfort than a lame nod and deer-in-headlights stare, but she was simply unable to offer anything more at the moment. "So, um… what do you do to accept it?"

Claire's giggle, made Bella's head jerk up. She had her hand girlishly covering her mouth while her eyes sparkled.

Kim's scolding click of her tongue drew Bella's gaze across the kitchen to where the girl was pouring the tea. "Claire," she sighed with roll of her eyes.

Bella released Emily's hand as she sat back in the chair, sensing imminent disaster. She rubbed her hands on her damp jeans as her gaze again found Emily's.

Emily's brows bobbed up with silent suggestion and Bella paled.

Claire giggled again.

"No," Bella breathed.

Emily's lips quirked up in amusement.

"Sex?" she checked in a choke.

Emily nodded as Kim joined in, crossing the room with two mugs of steaming tea. "It's not _just_ sex," she cooed dreamily.

"Yeah, no way." Claire sighed. "Quil does this awesome thing-…"

"Claire!" Emily reprimanded with a laugh.

Bella was beyond grateful, for too many reasons to count at the moment, as she took the mug of fragrant tea and knowing wink being offered her by Kim.

Emily turned back to her after accepting her own mug, as Kim paced back to the counter to grab up her own tea and one for Claire.

"But they're right, Bella," Emily smiled, setting the mug on the table and leaning subtly forward. "It's something… well something _totally different_."

"It's always awesome and luckily they want a lot of it," Claire provided helpfully.

Bella flinched. It was a million miles past uncomfortable to talk about sex with a 14 year old.

Emily grimaced apologetically, the scars puckering on the side of her face. "We actually don't know that much about imprinting, but yeah… we know that. It's part of all this crazy magic. The first time binds you together ."

Bella's brow furrowed in confusion.

"Like, I can feel when Sam is upset as he can with me," she tried to explain as she reached for her tea. "Or I can feel him come into a room. It's… hard to explain."

"It's s'posed to be rare," Kim added, setting a mug down in front of Claire. "The old stories just say: '_the gods bless chosen warriors with the gift of a perfect mate who will be bound to him for his eternity,_'" she mimicked a melodramatic storyteller's voice as she dunked her tea bag.

Bella frowned as she dragged the tea bag through the liquid by the little paper square. "I never heard that story."

"There are a few stories that are reserved only for ceremonies," Emily informed her. "But you remember the Third Wife?"

Bella nodded with a purse of her lips. That had actually been one of her favorites- it was the only one she could remember where the _woman_ was the hero.

"She was an imprint," Emily continued, a small smile of pride hitching up the mobile side of her mouth.

"But she was Taha Aki's _third_ wife," Bella arched a dubious brow.

Kim laughed. "But his only imprint - he lived a long time."

"So the imprint's just for the guy?" Bella asked skeptically as she blew over the steaming mug clasped in both hands.

"The Counsel says imprinting is just about producing offspring that carry the gene," Emily's hand fluttered unconsciously to her tummy. "But I don't know…" she looked first at Claire and then Kim who each nodded in turn; they'd discussed this before. "It seems like more than that to us," she shrugged.

A slow smile curved Bella's lips. "Figures," she snorted as she took a slurping sip of tea.

Emily's raised a brow. "What?"

"I mean, who makes up and tells these old stories anyway?" Bella asked slyly, panning the room and watching her own grin catch on each set of lips like wildfire.

The word burst out in unplanned unison: "Men."

And the room disintegrated into laughter.

Savage hisses boiled the forest as a human Jacob tumbled to the ground with the ankle of his prize grasped in an iron fist.

But this one was so much savvier then that last had been; just as Jacob was calculating for imminent impact, the demon executed a brutal scissor kick. Jacob caught a blinding blow to the jaw as the creature slipped free, somersaulting with lightning acrobatics down the ravine.

With a brusque twist of his body, Jacob landed on four paws and transformed his momentum into a snarling lunge after his prey. The wolf tore after the leech with jaws gnashing in rabid fury.

In the private recesses of his mind, Jacob was berating himself for his sloppiness. He should have seen that coming with the way this leech moved with the wile and agility of an athlete or a fighter. But Bella's laugh had been like crack to his senses, sending pleasure and peace surging through every neuron. It had relaxed him just enough…

'He's heading straight for the net,' Embry's supple voice slipped soothingly through Pack mind in an obviously covert bid to offer comfort to his friend.

_This_ was definitely not the way things went down in Jacob Black's Pack.

The wolf bristled, sending heat searing through all seven connections that were constantly tugging at this soul. He could feel his Pack collectively cower with a deferent shudder.

'Make some noise,' he hissed, slick like a serpent and greased with battle rage.

Immediately fervid howls lanced the rain-soaked skies. Down in the valley, even Collin and Brady joined in. Farther still, Sam lifted his muzzle in an unusual show of solidarity. Jacob could both hear and feel Embry and Quil flanking him on either side as they ran him toward where Jared and Paul lay in wait.

Jacob didn't join the howls, nor so much as blink from the sight of those inky locks fluttering behind his flight, the shells clacking softly like a beacon.

The demon-man's head whipped back and forth as he ran, the whites of his eyes wild and wide against his sable skin. Like a kaleidoscope, that image multiplied immediately, each branching out in a different direction like a fireworks display.

'Steady,' Jacob warned, low and gravelly. 'Scent and sound,' he tersely reminded them as he kept his dogged gaze trained on the source of that miasma and sound.

'We're giving this fucker to Paul,' he chuckled darkly, a chuff escaping his muzzle.

Paul was literally foaming at the mouth as his animal shimmied back and forth on his paws with relish. And he was just who Jacob needed at the moment - they couldn't afford any other mistakes with the fucking Cullens' treaty line so close. (It was preferable to keep the lines clean, but such flimsy boundaries hadn't a hope in the world of stopping Jacob right now.)

'On my mark, P,' Jacob crooned as he poured power into his stride and shortened the distance with an easy burst of speed.

Jacob gathered all of his innate rage and frustration into his gullet and released it in a savage roar that rent the sky like thunder. The entire Pack reflexively recoiled at such a sound - but so did the leech, tripping on a log as he whipped around with wild eyes and a mouth grimacing hissing terror.

Jacob's wolf jerked at his rein, keen to finish an easy kill… but he'd promised Paul.

With a pounce that was calculated to herd the creature's evasion straight into the path of his Pack mate, Jacob froze in his crouch low to the ground.

'Take 'em down,' he hissed.

Gleefully, the grey wolf dove through the trees with a ruthless snarl and went straight for an incapacitating thigh. Like a starting gun had popped, his brethren rushed into the fray and the forest boiled with barking snaps over the man's hoarse shrieks of pain. Chunks of dusky flesh were scattered to the ground like woodchips.

'Alive!' Jacob boomed, springing up to four tense paws as he watched the melee of fur bustling over thick viscous growls.

Embry, Quil, and Jared immediately went down to a crouch, their eyes trained with feral intensity on the dismembered body wriggling in the leaves. Paul, of course, continued to snap at the torso.

Jacob himself had to use every ounce of strength he possessed to force his own animal from finishing the job - with that repulsive and rousing scent, if the creatures were still moving, it was an imperative of every last instinct to destroy.

Forcing the wolf down with an obstinate hand, Jacob rose to two human legs as his snarls birthed human speech.

"Paul!" he bellowed, lunging forward and cuffing the grey wolf off to the side.

In the next second, Jacob had swept the demon-man up by the neck and was slamming him into the trunk of a massive oak. His Pack circled them restlessly, approving yips and growls skittering through pattering rain.

Jacob glared into the leech's face, disfigured from abuse and contorted in pain. There was something innately disturbing about acknowledging their former humanity with speech, but there were questions that needed answering this time.

"Is there another?" Jacob ground the demand through his teeth.

The leech clenched his eyes shut, baring razor teeth with a wrinkle of his nose.

"Tell me!" Jacob snarled, slamming the stump of a body back against the tree. The trunk shuddered with the force as rain and leaves showered down around them.

Those large eyes snapped open, incandescent and as red as blood. They made Jacob's lip curl with hatred.

In response, the leech hissed petulantly - a bloodcurdling sound that toyed with Jacob's restraint - making his hand grip that stone cold neck tighter.

"_Mon chaton_, why ever would I tell you a _thing_?" His exotic accent was pushed through a disparaging smirk. "You will kill me all the same, _non_?"

"Yeah." Jacob cocked his head, his eyes callously washing over the monster's pitiful attempts at bravado. "But there's the fast way," he arched a theatrical brow. "Or there's Paul."

Said wolf snarled eagerly and switched direction in his agitated pace around them.

"And he's a sick motherfucker," Jacob chuckled coldly.

A shadow of fear flitted over the bloodsucker's features but it was quickly subverted by gall. In a flash of insight, Jacob understood that this leech had _prepared_ to die.

The demon searched his face with those frightening eyes - Jacob knew it gave away nothing - and a small pink tongue darted out to lick lips that were regenerating to full perfection even as they spoke. With a quick jerk of his chin, Jacob alerted his Pack to the macabre chunks of flesh littering the ground that were now quivering and inching their way across the leaves in search of their body. With a growling shuffle, they were on it.

"Let me share a little secret with you," the creature whispered, drawing Jacob's eyes back to that haunting face. "This is nothing but a game that he plays. A Russian Roulette of revenge."

"Who!" Jacob veritably snarled, spittle spraying with his vehemence.

The leech raised his brows at the outburst and a dry chuckle rattled over his lips. "He watches you. It's just a game, _mon chaton_," he hissed. "And I am nothing but the decoy."

Jacob's brow furrowed as he leaned in closer with a grimace. But at that instant, as if on cue, a baleful howl peeled back the dusk.

Jacob's body seized at the scene that seared through his mind's eye: a pale, blond demon flashed to an abrupt stop in the clearing where the two cubs of the pack were crouched and snarling.

It was the most disturbing face he'd ever seen: the monster's eyes were vacant black holes brimming with menace and its thin lips curved up in a disturbing parody of a smile.

Utter silence leached through the Pack's veins like ice.

Jacob gulped in a breath and let the bloodsucker in his hand fall heedlessly to ground. "Embry, Quil… finish it," he rasped, even as he was turning, blind to the forest before him. Every last sense was trained on that horrifying scene playing in his mind.

The demon charged, long flaxen hair whipping back from a crackling hiss of violence.

And then chaos.

Snapping jaws.

Lightning limbs.

_Pain_.

A collective howl rose, clenched in the fist of fury and woe as Jacob dove into the Pack's turbulent seas as wolf.

As Alpha.

'Mom!' a boy's shriek reverberated in his skull, emasculating terror razing the façade of lineage and fate like a paper veil.

As Jacob's paws pounded a frenetic rhythm against the forest floor - faster even than his heart - he poured soothing comfort out through the bonds that connected each of his charges to his soul.

And rage.

'We're coming for you,' he whispered.

Another cry of anguish congealed in a howl outside and Bella looked up from where she'd collapsed her face in her hands. In the span of several minutes, the atmosphere in the kitchen had gone from bonding and amiable laughter to the somber hollowness of dread.

Bella's widened gaze panned to each girl: Kim leaning against the counter with her hand clawed over her mouth…. Claire with her forehead resting on her notebook at the table… Emily curved over her growing belly, clutching it protectively as two silent tears crept down her scarred cheek.

All the imprints felt it: something was wrong.

Bella did too.

"Jacob," she breathed, her deepest worry materializing on her lips.

The wolf outside the kitchen whined piteously, his claws scratching across the porch planks in his agitated stride.

Emily sniffled and Bella turned back to see her wiping her fingers under her eyes. "Sam's r-really upset," she hiccupped.

Bella tried to swallow her distress down her dry and swollen throat. The pain in this room was palpable and she'd never been able to just sit back and detach from suffering. She needed to do something about it.

And she needed to something with his sickening feeling churning in her gut.

"Let's comfort him," she whispered.

Emily's head whipped up, her eyes wide.

Bella pulled the corner of her lip into her mouth uneasily as she glanced at the two other sets of eyes trained on her in patent disbelief. Blinking nervously, Bella slipped off her chair and knelt in front of Emily, taking her cold shaking hands in her own.

"Sam was going crazy with Embry but he stopped for me," she murmured.

"We saw," Emily breathed, her eyes darting worriedly between Bella's.

"It's not 'cause I'm some kinda wolf whisperer," Bella muttered humorously.

Emily sniffed a laugh, allowing the lightness to incrementally raise her bowed shoulders.

"Embry said they're all programmed to protect the imprints. That it's the deepest instinct they have," Bella whispered. "To protect… us." She swallowed the word on a gulp.

_Us_.

She was an imprint too. _Jacob's_ imprint. Even in all this chaos and craziness, that thought still made her heart stutter uncomfortably. But there'd be time for facing that unnerving portent and potential later.

There had to be, because now… these women needed her.

Emily's inert hands came to life and grasped Bella's anxiously. "I know… but Sam… but-…" Tossing her head, Emily gave up on sorting through the fear that clamored behind her trembling lips, and she hung her head and sucked in a sob.

It broke Bella's heart.

"Hey," she whispered, releasing her hands and pushing back that shiny curtain of ebony hair. "Hey, Emily… I do understand. Really, I do." Her palms found the girl's jaw and cupped it gently, urging it up. "Trust…" Bella sniffed a mirthless laugh. "Yeah, that's a hard one even when you love him like you do."

Emily's eyes slowly raised to meet Bella's. They were swimming with conflict and uncertainty.

"I mean, I'm having trouble with that stuff with Jake too," she admitted with a squint. It was the first time she'd really confessed it…. even to herself. "He's my best friend and he … what? Jerks me around for over a year? Won't even return my calls?" she arched an indignant brow.

"But he's had _so much_ to deal with, Bella," Emily countered quietly. Somehow Bella was both pleased and annoyed that she jumped in to defend him.

Bella chuckled at herself. "I get it… _believe me_, _**now**_ I get it," she murmured with an absent nod of her head.

Emily smiled sympathetically.

"But even though I totally know he was doing his best with all the wolfy stuff … and he's done _crazy good_," she amended passionately. "And I _totally _forgive him." Bella paused blinking as she processed it even for herself. "It still kinda hurts, y'know? Even though I know he didn't mean to and he apologized, it still hurts."

With a soft open-mouthed breath, understanding kindled in the woman's eyes.

"And, I think it just takes time to heal," Bella continued.

"Yeah," Emily breathed.

"But the only way to heal is to try to trust a little and see how it feels," Bella pursed her lips. "Baby steps."

Emily's eyes were darting rapidly between her own - a million thoughts processing behind that liquid ebony.

As if on cue, Sam's agitated whines lapped at the outside of the house and Bella glanced at where both Kim and Claire were watching with rapt attention. "Let's open the back door and talk to Sam."

Emily's body stiffened and Bella realized that the kind of fear she had was lodged even in muscular memory. It would take time… but baby steps, right?

Bella unfolded to her feet - well, it wasn't very graceful. Emily caught her stumble with a steadying hand. But her usual clumsiness did have the added benefit of bringing Emily quickly up to her own feet.

"I'm a klutz," Bella muttered, keeping hold of the girl's hand as they walked toward the back door.

"I know," Emily laughed tightly - her eyes trained tensely on the door.

"How?" Bella frowned theatrically.

"Quil laughs about you anytime anyone trips," Claire offered brightly as her chair scraped across the floor.

Bella glanced over her shoulder at the girl standing from the table with a broad and guileless smile. "Damn him," Bella mumbled playfully and then turned back to Emily. "They really are a lot alike," she whispered. Claire had the same artless ignorance of social decorum that Quil had.

"Mm hmm," Emily hummed conspiratorially.

As they neared the door, Sam's wolf whined with increasing anxiety until Emily's feet simply surrendered.

With a reassuring smile, Bella released her hand and took the last steps alone. It felt like the entire room held its collective breath as she reached out to the old tin knob and pulled open the door.

The black wolf froze, filling the entire doorway behind the screen. With his ears bunched up on his head and his round yellow eyes, he looked almost as surprised.

Bella smiled to herself. "Hey, Sam," she murmured.

The animal swayed on its paws for a moment as he released another distressed whine.

"Shh," Bella soothed as slowly she slithered down to the ground on the worn wooden floor.

Sam seemed to take the cue and correspondingly slipped down to his haunches. He laid his head on his front paws and as his eyes darted to each woman through the screen.

"How's it going, huh?" Bella continued. "Is everyone okay?"

Claire was the first in the room to move and she stepped tentatively to the door, hanging on the knob uneasily. "D'you think he understands?" she asked.

Bella glanced over her shoulder. "Jake doesn't seem to understand when he's really wolfy."

"You've seen Jake's wolf?" Kim's asked skeptically.

Bella blinked, searching the three faces behind her. "Yeah," she ventured. "I was petting him on the beach today."

"You _touched_ him?" Claire gaped.

Bella nodded as she again panned the three girls. "You guys don't …?" She left the question hanging.

One by one each woman shook her head.

"We've seen them outside, but they never phase when we're close," Kim provided quietly.

Bella's brow dipped as she turned back to the huge animal in the doorway. "That must be hard," she mused. The words thoughtlessly slipped out before she'd really even had a chance to realize how profound they were. If the guys were trying to keep these different parts of themselves separate, it really _would_ be hard. _That_ right there was a recipe for insanity.

The wolf suddenly whined again, its eyes opening wide as its paws shimmied in place like it was about to bust out of its skin.

Bella looked over her shoulder at Emily who was several steps closer but had again frozen at the wolf's movement.

"Come sit by me," Bella urged softly, reaching out her hand in petition. "I think he's just excited to see you."

Emily tore her eyes away from the wolf to meet Bella's gaze.

"C'mon," she coaxed, stretching her hand again.

Nervously licking her lips, Emily took several more shuffling steps, her eyes trained on the wolf and her hand resting protectively on her belly. She took Bella's hand.

"I think you have more power than you think," Bella smiled as the woman slowly lowered herself to the floor.

"What d'you mean?" Kim asked from where she was now leaning stiffly against the counter by the door.

"Well I don't really know crap, of course… but back to those old stories," Bella grinned. "Do you really think the men are gonna want it to get out that an imprint has any kinda control over their big, bad macho wolves?" She raised her brow impishly.

Claire giggled.

"I mean, it was like Sam _had_ to stop when I grabbed him," Bella continued, her argument building steam as it coalesced in her own mind. "And when Jake was kinda-…"

She stopped herself; something in her innately knew that she couldn't say 'Jake was kinda losing it.' There was this reverent respect that he'd cultivated in this life out of necessity. These people all obviously depended on him. No wonder he couldn't afford to ever appear weak - he'd said so himself in so many words. _Bella_ - as his friend, if nothing else - had to support that too.

"Well, Jake was upset when I'd banged my elbow," she revised smoothly. "And it seemed like I was able to help soothe him." But in her mind she catalogued with increasing intrest both times in the garage and his house where her words had had such a profound effect on him. In retrospect, it had almost seemed like some kind of _compulsion_.

"Hey, Quil too," Claire rejoined. "Sometimes if he's really mad - like at my mom - if I touch him or tell him to calm down, he does."

Bella looked up at Kim who's brow was furrowed. "Yeah," she nodded, her eyes fixed on the wolf in the doorway.

"Touch is important," Emily whispered.

Bella's gaze snapped back to the profile of the woman who's eyes were locked on the huge wolf.

Bella licked her lips uneasily. "Do you guys feel that tingly thing when you … when you touch ..?"

Emily nodded slowly, her eyes not wavering from the hulking beast merely feet away.

Bella craned her neck behind her at both girls.

"Like a balloon in the winter," Claire informed her sagely.

Kim laughed but nodded her assent.

"It's kinda different, but it's like that with the wolf, too," Bella said softly, turning back to Emily and watching her carefully.

The woman finally tore her eyes away and met her gaze searchingly. "C-can we o-open the screen?" her hoarse stammer had obviously taken monumental effort.

Bella's gaze washed over the woman's uncertainty and then she glanced back at the other two who both looked nervous, but up for the challenge.

"Let's try," Bella agreed with a little more confidence than she was suddenly feeling. She hoped this wasn't a mistake.

Scooching across the worn wooden floorboards, Bella reached out her hand to the door as the animal lifted his head.

"Hey Sam," she greeted lamely. "We're going to open this, kay?" Ugh, sometimes she felt so stupid when she was talking to wolves.

The thought was absurd on so many levels that Bella laughed softly as she slowly pushed the screen open. It looked like it had been slammed a few too many times anyway - it swung easily free of its catch.

The wolf cocked its head curiously until it realized what she was doing and shuffled out of the way. It's massive body shimmying across the porch looked pretty funny.

Claire apparently thought so too and giggled nervously.

Holding the flimsy door open, Bella watched the wolf creep back toward them. He'd lowered both his head and his ears, his gaze trained singularly on his imprint. Bella looked back to see tears trailing down Emily's cheeks as she hiccupped a sob.

Sam whined as his paws shuffled forward just over the threshold while Bella released the door and scooted out of the way. That massive head, collapsed over his forepaws just inside the house, his eyes blinking and his tongue lapping at his muzzle in pitiful petition.

Glancing at Emily, Bella reached out a tentative hand to the beast.

"How 'you doin', huh, big guy?" Bella whispered, ghosting a single finger up the wolf's snout.

"Sam," Emily quavered, and suddenly she was awkwardly scooting forward. She reached out a shaking hand but it froze inches from his snout.

Sam chuffed again and then very slowly, very carefully stretched his muzzle out toward those trembling fingers. A large pink tongue darted out to lap over her hand and a single soggy laugh burst from the woman's throat.

"Oh, Sam," she whispered as she reached out to touch the ebony fur.

That same low soothing croon vibrated in the beast's chest - as it had with Jacob's wolf - and Emily pulled herself closer as her hand grew more confident and the magic of lupine touch visibly relaxed them both.

Bella blinked back her own tears as she leaned her head back against the door and the other two girls cautiously squatted down behind them.

"Can I touch him, Bella?" Claire piped.

"He's Emily's wolf," she smiled softly. "Ask her."

"Em?"

Emily bit her lip with a sniffling nod. Tears were now unapologetically running down both cheeks - one smooth, the other puckered and diverting the rivulets in a pattern.

Both Claire and Kim rearranged themselves on the floor and stretched out curious hands to the beast.

The black wolf's eyes fluttered closed as Emily leaned her cheek down on a felty ear while her sisters carefully brushed their fingers over the muzzle.

Bella's hand reached out and she tenderly traced her fingers along the line of his jaw. A large yellow eye popped open and Bella offered him a sad smile. She selfishly wished this was Jacob's wolf and her heart's prayer slipped out on a soft sigh:

"Oh, Jake. I hope you're okay."

Jacob's eyes fluttered closed as he greedily siphoned Bella's nurturing touch through the Pack's bonds. She was safe and she was thinking of him.

Just that was enough.

But she'd given him even more: in a few hours she had accomplished what had eluded them for an entire year - she was bringing peace to Sam. He could feel it as surely as he could feel her and the other women stoking the warmth of comfort in his Pack through Sam.

It gave him the strength for what came next.

Jacob's eyes opened back up to pain.

"Brady," he whispered, the words trimmed with velvet compulsion. Framed by Jacob's huge palms at his jaw, the boy's face was contorted in anguish. "Look at me," he soothed, gently shaking his head back and forth.

A sob shredded through gritted teeth as bloodshot eyes popped open to lock with his Alpha's. Jacob's eyes were already heated in yellow, pushing against their sockets in a demanding ache.

The boy gasped as Jacob's lupine power siphoned through their locked gazes. "You're alright," Jacob intoned, his voice diving into a bass register that was felt more than heard. The boy's eyes widened and glazed as his grimace slipped lax. He couldn't take away the boy's pain, but he could drown it in heat and power and strength.

"We're here," he crooned under his breath, softening his cradling palms. Leaning forward, Jacob touched his forehead to the boy's own for a moment, sharing breath with his hitching gasps.

But at least he was resting now. When Jacob had arrived in the clearing, the boy's keening wails had shattered his heart. Even thought it had taken every ounce of restraint not tear after that motherfucker himself with revenge in his eyes, Jacob had sent Paul and Jared after the trail.

Jacob's first concern was always his Pack.

Letting his hands slip from the boy's cheeks, he sat up slowly, closing his eyes and stretching out through Pack bonds to search for any clues that they'd missed. Not that he didn't trust Paul, but Jacob had seen the predator they were up against and he recognized the psychopathic drive behind those vacant eyes. _This was all a game_, the other leech had said. _A Russian roulette of revenge._

And now Jacob understood those cryptic words: he was searching for the bullet that would bring them all down to their knees.

Jerking a stiff breath through his nose, Jacob opened his eyes and sat back on his heels as his mind continued to race along with his wolves.

Collin shifted restlessly in the leaves, finally having phased back to human. His eyes were trained in horror on his friend's leg.

Jacob didn't need to look, he'd seen plenty already. It was snapped in half, the bone sticking out at an odd angle from flesh that was desperately trying to heal under the thick layer of crimson.

"You did real good, Collin," Jacob said drawing that haunted gaze as he rearranged Brady's head tenderly in the grass.

The Pack thought Collin's interference had kept the demon from finishing off his brother . That was the story he was going with, even though he himself (and probably Paul) knew better. That the leech had spared the boy's life in a calculated strategy to incite terror. Fear was a lethal weapon indeed, but a martyr could tip the scales past fear to rage.

Jacob was already there.

Swallowing his bile, Jacob forced his mind to the task at hand.

"C'mere," he spoke to the fourteen year old boy in the body of man. Both he and Brady hadn't had the time for their maturity to deepen as it did so quickly with both experience and this potent hormonal cocktail.

The boy-man dropped his gaze and shuffled toward his Alpha in the leaves. Jacob's hand brusquely clapped to the man's deltoid, the lupine touch sending a shudder down his body. "Look, Collin," Jacob murmured, bringing the boy's eyes up with a clear command. "I'm proud," he stated simply, looking deeply into those wide chocolate eyes.

They blinked in surprised gratification. Jacob knew the power of those words coming from their Alpha - along with touch - was all that was needed to shore up the boy's bleeding heart.

Brady required quite a bit more.

"I need you to change back now," he murmured, heating the words with soothing compulsion. "And go upstream and wait for Quil. You're patrolling with him."

The boy's eyes lowered as his chin dipped in obeisance.

Patting his shoulder roughly, Jacob released him and turned to Brady who was panting in the grass, his unblinking eyes trained on the branches of the sheltering tree.

Jacob's facial muscles twitched as he fought his grimace at the boy's broken form. The deep lacerations were already healing - there was nothing he could do for them. Thankfully his leg was left bent at such an angle that the rebreak would be easy.

But painful.

"Don't move," Jacob murmured to the boy, lacing the directive with filaments of compulsion. They wouldn't be enough.

Going up on his knees, his palm slipped tenderly over the boys rain and blood-streaked face. Shuffling down his body, he placed one palm on his intact thigh. With the other he reached to the calf of that twisted leg. Gritting his teeth, he leaned his body into the movement and jerked.

The sickening chalky crack was drowned by the boy's hoarse shriek of agony. His leg kicked against Jacob's restraint while his body lurched in pain.

"Shh," Jacob crooned as Brady's torso fell heavily back to the grass. "It's over," he whispered. "All done."

The boy moaned and twitched as Jacob made quick work of resetting the bone and his fingers clinically dug out the healing flesh from the contact points. It was gruesome work: even with his best attempts at detachment, his hands shook as he rearranged the flaps of skin and muscle. Luckily no one was around to see it.

But that was about to change - in three minutes to be exact.

Brady was blissfully unconscious now - as the reconstructed leg immediately sucked all his energy toward healing - and Jacob sprung up from the grass, reaching up to the spreading tree. He snapped off a two inch thick branch like it was a carrot and quickly began shucking off branches to make a brace to stabilize Brady's leg while it healed. He hoped it would be enough.

Embry galloped into the clearing as Jacob continued to snap twigs.

"Stay wolf," he breathed as his focus switched to his mind's eye. The leech had fled into the ocean and Paul and Jared hadn't caught the scent again, but were fervently pacing up and down the seaboard. Based on this, Jacob had been taking his time tending his cub, but the hairs were now prickling on the back of his neck.

Something wasn't right.

His hands stilled on the wood as an uncomfortable tingle raced through his muscles like a current.

Sucking in a breath, Jacob expelled it in whoosh as he fell to his knees as chills erupted over his skin. "Clearwaters," he gasped to Embry. "Tell Paul."

As Paul immediately switched direction for the stretch of bluffs under their house, Jacob's hand clawed over his heart. This was the same feeling he got immediately prefacing a new Phase.

Except twice as bad.

"Oh, shit," Jacob rasped as he staggered blindly to his feet. "Finish the splint," he gagged to Embry as he dove into the phase.

And a maelstrom of chaos.

At the same time that Paul caught the bloodsucker's scent coming out of the ocean near the Clearwaters, two new perspectives exploded in Jacob's brain. Like cameras coming on line, they jerked and jumped with static. A girl's screams of terror joined a boy's heartbreaking wails and echoed through the Pack mind with their confused pain.

Jacob was sprinting, barely conscious of the trees and branches whipping past him and clawing at his fur. He was desperately trying to piece together the kaleidoscope of tumultuous images being tossed like a tempest through the Pack mind by the two new wolves.

The Clearwater's yard. An old man. A blond flash of hair.

_H-ow... c-con-venient. _Garbled words wrenched and stuttered in chittering snatches_. Th-thought … wait ….f-or thi-this ...sh-show._

'Paul! He's there!' Jacob bellowed.

Suddenly with a sickening vertigo - like a film played fast forward and then abruptly stopped - all the pandemonium was snatched into the fist of a single pinpoint of terror :

Harry Clearwater - pale and his mouth agape with horror - was being held by his throat against the chest of that sallow demon. Like he was staring straight into the lens of this nightmare, the vampire's chilling gaze was trained on Leah and Seth Clearwater shackled by the pain of the phase in the grass.

And therefore it burned straight into Jacob's soul.

"I know you can hear me," he chuckled breathily, as his lips curved in a smile of sinister relish. "So," he cocked his head. "You can also hear this…"

His gaze locked with Jacob's mind's eye, he leaned down close to Harry's ear and whispered:

"Scream, old man."

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_Review if you like._


	9. To Your Knees

_A big warm and grateful hug to Tricky Raven, Jacob Black n' Pack and Fictionators who rec'ed this fic recently. If you haven't checked out their sites… do it. Home-grown, non-commercial and powered by passion and heart, they rock the Twi world._

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_Thanks as always to Tayjayfan for the preread. _

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_Mountain Tobacco:__ A topical herb good for pain, bruises and wounds (also called Arnica)_

_Thanks so much for reading and hope you enjoy._

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**Chapter 9 - To your knees…**

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The tense quiet of the kitchen was gutted by a strident ring.

The butter knife fell from Bella's hand to the table with a clatter and a splatter of mayonnaise. "Sorry," she mumbled as she wiped her hand briskly on her jeans on the way to her back pocket. Bella pulled out the shrilling device as her gaze panned the three sets of eyes fixed on her from around the table.

"My dad," she rasped and her shaking fingers flipped open the phone and brought it to her cheek. She felt oddly calm in the face of an eminent paternal disaster: she simply didn't have any more adrenaline left.

"Dad," she whispered, turning away from the table.

"Where are you!" His voice was harsh and strained and got right to the contentious point.

Bella squeezed her eyes shut in regret. "Um… I'm at my friend Emily's house."

"Emily who?" he snapped.

"Um," Bella's eyes popped open, as she turned frantically around, covering the mic with her palm. "Last name?" she mouthed to the woman, feeling like a total idiot.

"Young," the woman whispered, her hands stacking another baloney sandwich.

"Emily Young," Bella mumbled briskly into the cell, as she raked her hand nervously through her hair.

"On the Rez?" her father barked.

"Yeah," she whispered, squeezing her eyes shut again. She really didn't have the bandwidth to deal with his condemnation right now…

It never came. "Alright," her father mumbled. "Can you stay there for a while?"

Bella's eyes blinked open in surprise as her hand fell from her forehead in patent shock. It was only then that she was able to process just how stressed her father really sounded. "Dad, is everything okay?"

There was a pause on the other end of the line while the background sounds of a racing car and muted siren swelled up over the speaker.

"Dad?" Bella rasped, ice being let into her veins. Apparently there was still a little more adrenaline left. Minutes ago, they'd heard the sirens tearing through Rez's back roads. More troubling were the distant chorus of howls that wrapped around them like a vine.

"Harry had a heart attack, Bella," he whispered, grief bloating the words.

"Oh, no.. ." Bella gasped, turning back around and panning the three sets of frightened eyes staring back at her. "Do you know if…" she couldn't finish the sentence.

"I don't think he's gonna make it," he wheezed, answering her anyway.

Bella swallowed thickly as she listened to her father's uneven breath tumble over the mic in an unconscious rush.

"Dad, I'm so sorry-…"

"Bells," he choked, interrupting her brusquely. "I'm escortin' the ambulance…just stay put till I call, kay?"

"Of course," Bella assured him, nodding automatically against the phone.

"Love ya, kid," he mumbled.

"Love you too, Dad," Bella came back quickly. Urgently.

This time he waited to hear it before he hung up.

As the beep of the disconnecting call buzzed the speaker, Bella let the cell fall slowly from her cheek.

"Bella?" Emily's voice was quiet, worried.

Tears sprang to Bella's eyes; this last piece of tragedy was the final drop in an ocean angst and enough to raze the flimsy dam she'd been praying all night would hold. "Harry Clearwater had a heart attack."

Emily dropped the sandwich to the floor as both hands flew to her mouth. Bella was beside her in an instant, her own grief forgotten in the face of such personal pain.

"Dad doesn't think he'll make it. I'm sorry Emily," she whispered as she pulled a chair out at the head of the table with the harsh grating of wood. White lies weren't appropriate for black truths. She guided the girl to sit down and rested her hand on her shoulder as Emily covered her face with his palms.

"Poor Auntie Sue." Her gasp was strangled with heartache. "Oh, Lee-Lee…" Doubling over as far as her growing belly would allow, she sobbed piteously.

Bella bit her lip on her own sorrow as she encircled the woman in her arms and laid her cheek against her hair.

"Oh, Em," Kim whispered, squatting at her other side and resting her head against Emily's bowed shoulders.

Bella bit her lip on her own rallying tears as the rain tapped a nervous counter rhythm to Emily's hitching sobs. A scrabbling scratch against the porch stairs prefaced the anguished whine from outside and Bella looked up to see the black wolf peering through the screen with molten eyes.

Twenty minutes ago Sam's huge body had seized under their caresses like he'd been electrocuted, causing Emily to jump back and frantically clutch at Bella in sheer terror. But - even though that soft purr had abruptly descended into a harsh grating growl - the animal hadn't so much as moved until all four girls had scrambled back safely into the kitchen. Only then did he inch back, muscles quivering and jerking, the screen clattering behind him. Eyes locked on his fearful imprint, he'd risen to four imposing paws and bounded over the rail loosing a bloodcurdling howl that was quickly threaded by distant lupine cries.

As the wolf began a frenetic snarling pace, back and forth in the yard, Bella had decided that simply watching the animal wind her heart ever tighter would be the death of her. The death of all of them. So - like she'd always done - she decided to do something. Anything.

When Bella was nervous, she always turned to the kitchen and the wolves would need to eat, right? There weren't a lot of options for food in the house but there were several loaves of white bread in generic plastic bags and some luncheon meat and processed cheese in the refrigerator. So with Bella's prompting, they'd set up an assembly line of sandwich-making at the kitchen table, slathering their anxiety over crappy bread along with mustard and mayo.

Glancing down the table, she saw that Claire was still there, standing stiffly at her station with her lips pressed so tightly together they were white. The girl's hands were shaking but mechanically unwrapping slices of cheese from their cellophane sleeves and adding it to a mountain that far surpassed the bread on hand.

Bella's heart broke. A long past of suppressed pain was evident in the way her head was turned uncomfortably away from the grief being displayed down the table.

Slipping her arms free from the embrace of the two women, Bella straightened and wiped her hands on her jeans.

"Claire's got the right idea," Bella announced quietly, as her eyes stayed glued on the girl. "Let's just keep going until they come back and we can figure out what's going on."

Claire's dark eyes peeked up from under long lashes, meeting Bella's skittishly. It was the first glimpse she'd had into the girl's turbulent heart.

Bella smiled reassuringly and strode down the table toward her, picking up a slice of bread and her knife. Glancing back at the two women, who were bravely wiping at their tears while they were gathering themselves, Bella again started making sandwiches.

"Can you pass me one of those?" she asked Claire with a raise of her brow.

Claire obliged, letting a square of artificial orange slither into Bella's palm. Her eyes stayed carefully trained on the sandwich Bella was creating.

"Do you think Quil's okay?" she whispered.

The girl spoke directly to the personal fear and anxiety that was battering her own heart. She was so worried about Jacob her chest _physically_ ached. Bella snatched several pieces of bologna up and unceremoniously slapped a piece of bread over the pile of nitrites as she pulled her lip into her mouth.

"I hope so," she murmured. Leaning over and letting the sandwich drop onto the plate piled high in the middle of the table, Bella turned back to the girl. "But, Claire, no matter what," she continued quietly, speaking both to the girl and herself.

Those dark eyes turned to her, swimming with heartbreaking fear and worry.

"We've got to stick together and be brave," Bella whispered. "All of us. "

Claire's eyes darted between Bella's skeptically, searching for duplicity with the doggedness of a child who'd been betrayed too many times.

"I'm scared too," she admitted earnestly.

Claire's brow furrowed and suddenly she was throwing her arms around Bella shoulders. "Don't be scared, Bella!" she cried, into her hair, nearly blowing out Bella's eardrum. "Everything's gonna be alright. Our wolves are kick-ass."

Bella smiled into her shoulder as the girl awkwardly squeezed her. Suddenly she realized she'd only ever seen Claire touch Quil… and Sam's wolf. She seemed to always hang back on the edges of whatever Kim and Emily were doing with a subtle mistrust. All that childlike (and inappropriate) exuberant humor guarded a damaged heart to be sure.

Ending the hug as abruptly as it started, Claire took two steps back and immediately went back to unwrapping unneeded cheese.

Bella cleared her throat and picked up another slice of bread as she glanced to the other two women who were back in their places. Kim's lips curved in an uneasy smile from where she was smearing mustard. Emily's head was tucked but she was also meticulously peeling off slices of ham.

For several minutes the kitchen was filled with the heaviness of heartache and the shuffling sounds of food preparation punctured by the sharp pattering of rain on the corrugated porch roof.

Bella drew in a deep breath and tried to center herself. Over the last week, she'd been thrown into a whirlpool of emotional turmoil and trauma and had been flailing wildly to keep her head afloat. The lead weight that sat front and center in her chest was both ballast and burden:

Jacob.

Beyond the soul-deep worry and the new appreciation for what he'd been through this last year (courtesy of this intimate behind-the-scenes glimpse) was a very selfish fear:

As much as she wished she could deny it, the imprint frightened her.

Aside from the fact that at not- yet-eighteen, the concept of _any_ kind of forever was inconceivable, she was starting to understand the responsibilities that came with it. She'd thought merely to dig in and help him, like she always had, and offer her support, friendship and affection in bite-sized and comfortable chunks. But it was becoming clear that he needed much, much more.

Yet so did she.

Her heart was aching she missed him so much. It was a deep-down yearning that threaded her bones and seemed to cinch tighter with each breath, making her hands tremble. As much as she tried to justify it away into stress or fatigue or simply the disorientation of having everything turned upside down, she couldn't. Bella wasn't very good at lying - especially to herself.

It was the imprint.

Life was so much simpler lived within the practical lines of the mundane - the reasonable and realistic. Yet standing before her was a choice that would not only radically change her life, it would immutably alter her very soul.

It was a fairytale and nightmare all rolled into one and the stupid Victorian romances she'd liked to escape to certainly hadn't prepared her _anything _like it. She wasn't being offered some chaste uptight proposal on bended knee in front of heavy velvet curtains that hid the day-to-day reality. This was an impassioned plea being made from war's trenches that were churning with lust, want and _need_. It was a single decision - sealed by sex, no less - where both her body and soul would be irrevocably offered in sacrifice to the unknown.

Terrifying didn't even come close.

The knife in her hand slipped from numb fingers and fell to the table and the jangle echoed in her ears like tinnitus.

Every other person in that kitchen instantly stiffened, their gazes landing on her with a palpable weight.

And in that moment, Bella truly understood: Jacob hadn't even been given the luxury of fear or self-doubt in this thing - too many people depended on him. For the first time in her life Bella realized just how sheltered and selfish she really was.

Licking her lips, she tucked her head and picked up the knife, desperately scrabbling for encouraging words to offer the other three women.

But a rabid snarl tore through the uncertainty and silence and Bella whipped around to the screen door.

"SAM!" a voice bellowed. "Sam stop!" Paul's imperious bass was met by vicious barks as Bella sprinted toward the door.

"SHIT!"

In the halo of light cast by the house into the darkness, she was just in time to see Paul lunge out of the way of a determined assault, diving into the form of a massive grey wolf in an explosive tatter of cloth. In a blurred instant, the black animal had whipped around with agility that defied its size. It lunged with savage aggression and the two beasts tumbled across the lawn in a flurry of fur and boiling growls.

"Emily!" Bella shrieked, turning back into the house. "Emily we gotta stop him!"

But the woman was frozen where she stood at the table with both hands over a mouth agape with terror.

Without another word, Bella turned back to the screen and slammed it open as she barreled through it. The two wolves were continuing to their wild scuffled across the rain-soaked darkness, their yellow eyes flashing like fireflies in the blurred fumble of dark fur.

"SAM!" she screamed, the words clawing at her throat. "Sam STOP!"

At that moment, the grey wolf wrenched free and went down on his haunches, his muzzle peeled back from gleaming fangs and his black counterpart twisted up to a crouch with a guttural snarl preparing for another attack.

Bella lunged across the porch. "Sam!"

"Sam," Emily's rasp was a tremulous echo.

Bella whipped around to see the woman gripping the door frame. Her heart going a million miles per hour, Bella reached out her hand in petition with wild pleading eyes.

Out on the lawn the black wolf was still growling furiously but had not yet sprung again toward his prey. "Say it again, Em," Bella gasped, her head frantically whipping between them.

"SAM!" she shrieked to the sky, squeezing her eyes closed as Bella crossed to take her hands and pull her onto the porch. "Sam stop!"

The black wolf's growls softened into a rumble where he crouched in the mud.

Her eyes darting between the animal and the woman in her arms, Bella led Emily out onto the porch. "He's listening, Em," she whispered as she wrapped her arm tighter around the girl's shoulders.

"Sam, I need you!" Emily's fear birthed the words in a wail as her eyes stayed locked with the beast in the yard.

Still the black wolf's fierce eyes were trained on the intruder, now slinking backward to the edge of the darkness.

"P-Please, Sam," Emily hiccupped quietly, as the two women stopped at the top of the stairs.

For the first time, the black wolf turned toward them , his ears immediately softening from threat to submission.

"Please, let Paul come in," she pled, as Bella helped her lower her shaking body down to wide cement steps.

Just on the edges of the light spilling over the lawn, the grey wolf seemed to rear up and shimmer at the same time.

And in the next instant, Bella got to see far more of Paul Lahote than she'd ever wanted.

Actually it was the most she'd seen of any man to date and she was pretty sure the shock broke something. With a strangled choke she took two reflexive steps back as heat rushed to her cheeks. She dropped her gaze to Sam's wolf who was creeping toward Emily on a submissive belly.

"Here, Bella," Kim laughed quietly at her side.

Bella turned to see the girl offering up two pairs of knit shorts.

"I wish I could say you get used to it," she smiled wryly as Bella took them from her hand while her heart beat in her face.

There was hardly time for demure however. Even though the black wolf was pushing it's muzzle into Emily's bare feet on the steps there was a petulant rumble tumbling in his chest.

" 'You alright, Emily?" Bella asked.

The woman looked up from where her hand tentatively ghosted over the fur. There were tears shining in her eyes, but also a wonder. And a budding confidence. Bella's lips curved of their own accord.

"I'm going to see if I can get him to change back," Emily whispered, while one hand continued to stroke that massive head and the other reached out in petition.

"Brady's hurt," Paul's voice interjected, rough, tense.

Bella's head snapped back to the yard where Paul was standing now screened by the railing of the long porch. His face was somber and severe - not an ounce of his old comforting snark to be found.

"Bring him around front," Emily replied.

Bella turned back to see her hand still outstretched and finally she understood and tossed her one of the shorts.

"I have a box of medicine and bandages…" Emily said, meeting Bella's eyes with conflicted anxiety.

Something clicked into place deep inside her. Bella understood what was being asked of her - not by the woman but by the situation itself. "Come in when you can," Bella replied softly and then whipped back around to Paul and tossed him the shorts.

He snatched them from the arc of her crappy throw. "We'll meet you in front," Bella said in a clipped monotone as she immediately headed for the screen.

Kim followed after.

"Do you know where Emily keeps her stuff?" Bella asked out of the side of her mouth as Kim held the door open for her.

"Yeah," she replied, trailing behind her and shutting the screen.

"Claire get some blankets, kay? Maybe a bedspread for the floor?" Bella called out as she crossed the deceptively comforting kitchen. Her adrenaline and nerves were winding ever tighter like a noose making her chest feel tight and the light jump in a funny way.

It was actually fortuitous at the moment that the living room was so eerily bare with just a ripped couch crouching in the corner. Emily had said there'd been an "accident" last week but Bella hadn't pressed for details. With the holes in the walls and the deep clawing grooves in the hardwood floor, it wasn't hard to guess what had happened.

Glancing over her shoulder, she saw Claire and Kim rushing to get the supplies. Drawing in a deep shaking breath, she opened the front door wide.

Paul and a man she didn't know where jogging out of the darkness carrying a prone figure between them. Part of her had been desperately hoping that Jacob would be there, though the better part of her knew that if he'd come, it would have been him out back rearing up to naked glory instead of Paul. She was ashamed of the shiver of titillation that the thought awoke in her belly, even at a time like this.

Bella pushed brusquely out onto the porch holding the screen open from outside while the two men climbed the stairs. As they passed into the house, Bella involuntarily gasped. The man's face - Paul had said his name was Brady - was contorted in pain and his body was covered in blood, dirt and zigzagged by deep gashes. One of his legs was bound by what looked like strips of torn shorts to two thick sticks.

And Kim had been wrong: the fact that he was nude barely registered in Bella's fearful brain.

Biting her lip, Bella followed them, closing the screen behind her.

"Lay out that comforter," Bella veritably barked as she hustled around the hulking men to the pile of every type of linen known to man piled at Claire's feet.

"Quil?" she squeaked, frozen with her saucer eyes trained on the men.

"Claire!" Bella snapped, lunging forward and dragging a thick quilt from the pile.

Kim dropped the bin in her hands to the floor and hustled forward to help Bella spread it out across the damaged floorboards.

"He's okay, Claire," the strange man soothed as he and Paul gingerly squatted in concert with their injured Pack mate between them.

For a second, Bella was frozen by shock and indecision; the man's wounds looked so much more horrifying in the light of the house.

But it was only a second. Everything else fading into inconsequential as Bella fell down to her knees beside Brady while her eyes briskly catalogued the damage.

"Where's that first aid stuff," she rasped, holding out a blind hand. The deep, dirty gashes were oozing and pussy and his leg was like something out of a Tim Burton film. It looked like his leg had been ripped off of then reattached, the gruesome jagged seams puckered and red. He wasn't bleeding profusely, but this still hardly counted as healing "fast" as Embry had claimed.

Movement at her side had her look up to Paul, squatting beside her with the first aid box. His eyes were dark and piercing.

"Why isn't he healing!" she demanded, pulling the box out of his hand and immediately dropping her gaze to its contents. There were bottles of tinctures and baggies of herbs that she had no clue how to use, but she recognized the sterile packets of huge wound wipes well enough. She snatched out several and tossed the box to the side.

"Well?" Bella snapped, looking up at Paul with a frown as she tore two open at once.

Paul's unreadable eyes were strangely intense and locked on hers. His mouth popped open as if to speak.

And Bella rolled her eyes as she pulled out an antiseptic wipe and shoved it into his hand. "Since you can't talk, do something," she snorted ungraciously.

"He _is_ healing," the other man offered. "It's just there was a lot of…_damage_." He choked on the word, and Bella's gaze darted up to the man's eyes.

What she saw there made her breath catch in her throat. His face was a man's to be sure, but the traumatized worry that widened those eyes belonged to a frightened boy.

Bella nodded and forced her lips into a smile. "Then you know he'll be fine… it just will take a little longer, huh?" she soothed, shamelessly reassuring him with nothing but hope.

"I'm Collin," the boy whispered, his lips twitching like a habitual smile was fighting that grimace. It lost.

"Bella," she replied, her eyes dropping to the cloth in her hand. That shell-shocked innocence glistening in his big brown eyes was simply too heartbreaking to witness.

She reached out and gently started cleaning the gash on Brady's abdomen that indeed appeared to be healing, but was filthy and oozing at the moment.

Brady moaned quietly and Bella's gaze snapped up to his face. Kim quickly knelt on the man's other side as she pulled a sheet decorously over his hips.

"Kim, get him some water," Bella whispered incidentally as her hand flew up to brush the hair from the man's furrowed brow. He was burning up and slick with sweat. "Get some cold wet wash cloths too," she called after the girl who was stumbling into the kitchen.

Bella had absolutely no idea what she was doing. She'd had some first aid in school, but it certainly didn't cover how to care for a shapeshifter who'd obviously had a run-in with a vampire.

And lost.

Bella shivered as she gently dabbed the cloth on the cut on Brady's cheek. The best she could hope to do is clean him up and wait until Emily came in to show her what to do with the infinitely more effectual Quileute medicine.

"We've never had anyone hurt," a voice quavered.

Bella looked up to see Claire still frozen in the same spot - her feet still covered in pillowcases and sheets - and her hands over her trembling mouth.

"Quil's okay, Claire," Bella repeated with manufactured confidence. "Go bring some sandwiches."

Claire's teary eyes wandered blearily over to Bella's stare like she didn't speak English.

"Claire," Bella said sternly. "Sandwiches."

The girl blinked and then nodded briskly, tripping over the linens on her stumbling way to the kitchen.

Bella returned her gaze to Brady who was panting quietly through gritted teeth. She dabbed tenderly at his brow. "Is everyone okay?" she whispered to the room, her own personal worry finally overrunning her heart.

She heard Paul swallow beside her, but she didn't take her eyes off the suffering before her as she cleaned blood and dirt from pink healing skin as quickly and gently as she could.

Collin cleared his throat. "Harry Clearwater's dying," he whispered.

Bella pressed her lips together as her hand froze on Brady's cheek. "We know," she breathed. She should have guessed the call from her dad was connected to this. Shamefully she didn't want to know the details - she was only interested in one thing.

"Jake?"

"He's trying to get Seth and Leah back to human," Collin mumbled.

Bella's head snapped around. "They phased?" she gasped, her eyes automatically finding Paul.

He nodded ruefully, not pausing from his cleaning of Brady's leg.

"The rest are making sure the leech isn't coming back," Collin continued, sitting back on his heels with a tired sigh.

"You didn't get it?" Bella asked quietly.

Collin shook his head with a grimace and her gaze again darted to Paul.

His face had darkened into a bitter severity that told her just how bad it had been. And still was. Refusing to meet her gaze, the muscles in his jaw bulged as he continued to clean Brady's leg.

Bella bit her lip and returned to her attention to cleaning Brady's face. It was just too hard to watch Paul Lahote's hands shake.

"Here Bella," Kim's voice was soft and unsure.

Bella looked up as the girl crossed the barren living room wielding washcloths in on one hand and a glass of water in the other. At a muted sob, her eyes automatically darted past Kim to where Claire was frozen in the kitchen door with tears streaming down her face and a plate of sandwiches held in unsteady hands.

This was just too much for the girl. As it should be for any of them, but she was no more than a child.

Glancing behind her wordlessly, Bella found both Collin and Paul watching her. The "oh shit, a crying girl" trepidation in both sets of eyes would have been funny under different circumstances.

"I'll be right back," she whispered to no one in particular as she draped the wipe over Brady's abdomen and unfolded to her feet.

"See if you can get him to drink a little," Bella said quietly to Kim as she passed by. "Hey Claire," Bella murmured to the girl's frightened eyes as she took the plate of sandwiches from her trembling fingers. With the other she reached out to the girl. "C'mere, sweetie."

Claire only hesitated a second before throwing herself into Bella's embrace. Bella turned them both back into the kitchen as the taller girl bent down to press her face into Bella's shoulder.

"They said Quil's fine," Bella whispered into the flyaway hairs that had come loose from her long braid, trying to soothe her.

"They're in my grade," the girl hiccupped into Bella's shoulder as quiet tears leaked out, warm and wet, down her shirt.

"Hmmm?" Bella asked, as she set the sandwich plate on the corner of the table and stopped them in the middle of the kitchen.

With a juicy sniffle, Claire picked her head up. "Brady and Collin," she quavered. "I know them from school. And it… Brady's s-so…" The words died on her lips as fresh tears welled in her eyes.

Bella's brow furrowed as a hand came up to push some of the wisps of hair from the girl's cheek. Surely it couldn't be. "Brady's your age?"

Claire tried to bravely blink away tears as she nodded briskly. "Collin too."

Bella closed her eyes and sighed heavily through her nose. What kind of world was this where children were forced to be adults before they'd finished puberty? Bella herself had had to grow up fast in the face of her mom's flaky narcissism, and she knew kids in distant countries were forced into wars every day, but she hadn't expected to find such a thing so close to home.

Claire sniffled again and Bella's eyes popped back open to the girl's searching gaze. There was no time for railing against injustice right now -like no other time in her life, Bella needed to be strong.

"Brady's going to be fine, sweetie," Bella whispered, hoping the earnestness she put into the words could make them true. "Let's see how Emily's doing, huh?"

Claire visibly tried to pull herself together and finally released her death grip on Bella as she straightened and wiped at her face. Wrapping her arm around the girl's shoulder she lead her toward the back porch - her heart was breaking for the girl, but in the other room, a boy was already broken.

Bella pushed open the screen to find Emily still sitting on the top step, but the big black wolf was now sprawled out over the porch with his massive head resting in her lap. Her hands continuing to rhythmically stroke over his head, Emily craned around with worry threading the lingering traces of a tender smile.

Sam didn't even twitch an ear.

"How is he?" Emily asked tensely.

Bella squeezed Claire's shoulders tighter. "He's going to be fine," she grimaced, telling Emily the truth with her face. "Do you have anything for the pain?"

Emily's lips pressed together briefly. "It won't work on them. Their metabolism…"

Bella sighed softly.

"Best to just clean him up first and we can put some herbs on the wounds to help a little after," Emily continued, worry in her eyes. "I'll be in in a minute. He's close." She glanced down at hulking animal stretched out beside her.

"I thought maybe Claire could help," Bella offered, with a meaningful widening of her eyes.

Emily nodded and her gaze darted to the girl who was hunched into Bella's side. "Claire, honey," she said. "Come tell Sam one of your funny Quil stories."

Claire shifted uncomfortably at her side.

"Like when he tried to give Embry a hickey with the vacuum cleaner?" Emily prompted with a broad smile.

A single soggy laugh burst from the girl's lips.

Bella's lips quirked unenthusiastically - usually she'd want to hear this one, but her mind was somewhere else entirely. So many different somewhere elses, that she could barely think straight, actually.

Patting the girl's shoulder, she unceremoniously pushed her toward the woman and her wolf, and brusquely pulled open the screen.

In the light of the bright worn kitchen, Bella drew in a resetting breath as she bustled across the room to the table. She grabbed the abandoned plate of sandwiches on her way back to the living room but her feet froze in the doorway.

The sight before her shattered her heart. Paul was kneeling behind the broken man on the floor, tenderly supporting his head while Kim was holding the glass of water to the man's lips… the _boy's_ lips. Collin was kneeling on his other side whispering encouraging words to his friend.

It was then that Bella realized she didn't know the first thing about love.

The selflessness in that room was scalding. The teens huddled on the floor of this gutted living room in this humble little house were doing their best to make sense of a ponderous weight and responsibility that had no right to be asked of their years. This, right here, was true love: not the warm rosy valentine fluff of the storybooks, but the messy, frightening kind of devotion that made you bet your soul absolutely with no collateral but your heart.

It was then that Bella understood what was being asked of her: Faith.

Faith in Jacob. Faith in _herself. _Faith in love and heart and a world that certainly didn't play by the rules.

It was real and it was frightening.

"Good Bray, real good," Paul's murmur snapped Bella back into moment.

Shaking her head to clear it she crossed the room and set the plate down on the floor as she knelt beside Paul. Brady's swollen eyes were cracked open as he took tiny panting sips at the glass that Kim was holding to his split lips.

"No more," he rasped, as he turned his face abruptly to the side with gasp.

Kim's shaking hand spilled water all down his neck. "Sorry," she whispered, as she pulled the cup away.

Bella turned and grabbed up a towel and patted the water away as Paul slipped out from under the man's head, lowering him back to the floor.

"Wait," Bella murmured, whipping back around to pull another towel from the pile of linens. She briskly rolled it up and pushed it under Brady's head and Paul slowly lowered him down to the makeshift pillow. "Hey Brady," she whispered, scooting closer as she grabbed up one of the wet towels that Kim had abandoned beside him. "I'm Bella," she soothed as she gently dabbed the towel across his forehead.

A bloodshot eye cracked open. "Cold," he wheezed.

Bella pressed her lips together as her gaze darted up to Kim. "See if you can find another blanket. Pull it off a bed if you hafta."

She nodded and shot up to her feet while Bella pulled the thin sheet up over his chest. The man was burning up but his body must need the high temperature to heal. The lacerations looked to be slowly mending, but several of the deeper gashes were still angry red. "We're getting you a blanket, but I've gotta get some of these wounds cleaned up, 'kay?" Bella murmured.

Paul was back to kneeling at Brady's side and quickly pulled out another handful of antiseptic wipes and some peroxide from the first aid box.

"Thanks," Bella mumbled, reaching out to take the offered items.

Paul didn't let them go.

Confused, Bella looked up to his face with a frown.

"Collin," he said - his eyes, intense and locked on hers. "Tell 'er thanks."

Bella's lips pressed together as she nodded curtly. "You should go help Jake," she whispered as he slowly released the items to her hands.

Paul blinked and the covert worry he was trying to hide bobbed up to surface …before he submerged it again.

Bella cleared her throat softly as she gathered the tatters of courage around her like a shawl.

"Go, Paul," she pronounced quietly, firmly. "I got this."

It felt like such a bold-faced lie that she was surprised a lightning bolt didn't flash down and zap her into ashes.

Paul's unreadable eyes darted between hers for a moment. With a subtle squaring of his jaw, he dropped his gaze in a gesture that seemed oddly deferential… and so unlike the Paul she didn't even know what to think .

Kim came hurrying back into the room dragging a large quilt and Paul promptly congealed to his feet with the liquid grace that they all seemed to share as his muscles rippled down his bare chest. A soft blush rushed to her cheeks at the memory of seeing him shortless in the yard, as she briskly reached out to grab the edge of the blanket Kim was offering.

"Collin," Paul bit out with a jerk of his chin and his Pack mate obediently rose to his feet.

With that in mind she hastily called, "wait! Do you need clothes for…?"

His hand already on the screen, Paul turned back around with a furrowed brow.

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth as she helped Kim spread out the blanket over Brady's body, hoping she hadn't misunderstood something. Paul had said Jake was trying to get Leah and Seth to phase back hadn't he? _She_ wouldn't want to change back to a naked body in front of a bunch of boys.

"Y'know f-for Leah?" she stammered uncomfortably.

"Good thinking, Bella," Kim said quietly as she sprang to her feet once again. Bella watched her rush back down the hall and then turned back to where Collin and Paul were both staring at her like she'd grown another head. But she understood the look in their eyes now; they clearly hadn't thought far enough down the twisted road of having a girl phase into their Pack. Which really wasn't all that surprising considering the night they must have had - the collateral damage shivering under the blanket by her knee was evidence enough.

Biting her lip a little fiercer, Bella turned around and grabbed up the plate of sandwiches. "You guys hungry," she offered.

Paul's gaze darted abruptly past her as his mouth fell slack and Bella was just turning to follow it when a large hand gently usurped the plate from her hands.

Starting, Bella looked up in surprise at the tall imposing figure of Sam Uley.

"I'll get Lee-Lee a sundress," Emily's voice murmured from the kitchen door and Bella watched her rush off after Kim.

In the years on the Rez, she'd only seen Sam in passing - at bonfires or at the store. But he still had that same stoic face that looked to be dangerously teetering on the edges of a frown.

"Thanks, Bella," he murmured softly, his eyes intensely burrowing into hers. And with no other word than that, he crossed the room, proffering the plate of sandwiches to the two men. Paul bumped Sam's knuckles before he snagged a sandwich, and then Sam clapped a firm hand on Collin's shoulder.

Incidentally opening up the package of wipes in her hand and the peroxide, she watched Sam murmur something to the attentive two while they each decimated a sandwich in two measly bites. The intimate body language between the three was interesting - they stood closer than was the norm for macho heterosexual guys and Sam had casually left his hand on Collin's shoulder. Like brothers… like Pack.

Emily came back into the room with a some anonymous clothes in her hand as Kim trailed behind her and promptly sat back down on the other side of Brady. Bella handed her a wipe and then pulled up a corner of the blanket to reveal the deep gash over the man's ribs. She drizzled peroxide generously over the red and pussing wound and watched the foam rise up in frothy white. Brady gasped quietly as his back arched off the floor.

Bella's gaze snapped up to the man's grimace and automatically brushed her fingers over his cheek. "Sorry," she whispered.

Brady shook his head briskly. "S'just cold," he rasped.

Emily was lowering herself to the floor beside Bella and pulling the box toward her. "Some Mountain Tobacco will help with the pain and healing," she murmured, digging through box and pulling out a glass jar of salve.

Bella dabbed away the cleansing peroxide as Emily unscrewed the metal cap .

"Tell Jay I'll phase a few times an hour and check in," Sam was saying at the door. Both the louder tone and the reference to Jacob made Bella look up at where Paul was pushing open the screen as Collin hastened through ahead of him.

"Be careful," Paul hissed. "I don't think that motherfucker's coming back tonight, but still…" the words were ground into silence by his molars.

"I'll take care of them." Sam's determined bass made the words sound like a blood oath.

Paul paused in the doorway and his eyes swept back into the room, immediately finding Bella's. A ghost of his signature smirk hitched up the side of his mouth as he turned back to his brother. "I think you' got that ass-backward, Uley."

'

The transformation wasn't supposed to happen backwards like this. Jacob pulled the whimpering cub's head up off the leaves and looked into those pained yellow eyes framed by his hands. Seth's body didn't have the strength to hold this shape any longer.

It wasn't supposed to happen like this. None of it.

Seth and Leah had phased before their human bodies had spent the full few weeks of unnatural growth preparing them for the change. Leah's animal had been smaller and sleek, but Seth's looked like nothing more than an overgrown puppy - his fur was soft and downy and his paws childishly overlarge for his form.

A rustle made Jacob's head snap up to where Leah was stumbling out of the trees, looking like some wild child with her long hair hanging in a tangled, matted clump. One of Emily's free-form dresses was pulled down unevenly over a trembling body that had turned hard an muscular in the space of two hours. She groaned in pain and stumbled forward on a direct intercept for the ground.

Embry and Collin were at her side in a heartbeat, pulling an arm over each broad shoulder and picking her up off her knees.

One down, one to go.

The only laughable advantage to this cruel twist of fate was that he was able to coax them back so soon. The two siblings were heartsick with grief and hamstrung by bodies that weren't ready for such punishment. The sight and scent of a leech snatching their old man from where he was putting away tools in the shed had jumpstarted a process that was merciless to begin with.

The only saving grace in this whole thing was that Paul had charged up over the edge of the cliff before that psychotic demon had been able to do the unthinkable. The leech had dropped his victim in self-defense, but Harry's weak heart had stopped before he'd hit the ground.

Still the monster had won.

It had chosen that house for a reason: just a lightning leap over Paul's snarling offense and he was jettisoning over the cliffs. It was a fall that would have killed anything that had been alive.

But that _thing_ was anything but.

Even still, Paul couldn't forgive himself. Self-flagellation whipped him into a hell-bent rage as he myopically patrolled the borders even now.

Jacob turned back to the cub panting in his grasp. "Jared, Quil," he spoke directly into those pained yellow eyes, warming the words with an Alpha's demand that would leach through the Pack bonds. "Come back now."

In the distance two howls threaded the moonless inky sky.

"Seth," Jacob continued, looking deeply into that traumatized stare as he rearranged himself on his knees. "I need you to phase back now." The words were cut from an incendiary compulsion and he watched them immediately enkindle the change in that quivering youthful body. It rippled in waves down that sandy gossamer pelt and the animal whined in agony.

"Seth!" Leah's voice was hoarse, broken. "Get away from him!"

Jacob ignored the woman's desperation as he stoically held the wolf's eyes in the power that was both his birthright and curse.

The whimpers became yelps of pain as Collin and Embry went from support to restraint of the shrieking woman.

As fur split to skin and bones rearranged with sickening cracks, the lupine yowls burst into human wails of suffering and soon - thankfully - Jacob was holding a human boy's face in his hands. A face that was contorted in pain but captured in the hypnotic stare of his Alpha.

"Goooood," Jacob crooned soothingly to those haunted eyes that were cooling to black. "Real good, Seth." The boy's face had aged three years in two and he was sobbing piteously, sweat and tears intermingling in rivulets down his face.

"SETH!" Leah shrilled while Jacob's hand tenderly soothed over the boys cheek as he let him slither to the ground in a quivering heap.

Turning to where Leah was struggling weakly against Embry and Collin's restraint, Jacob stood to his feet. "He needs you to be strong, Leah," he said quietly and then nodded permission to his two Pack mates.

They released her, and she stumbled forward, falling to her hands and knees. Jacob took a step back as she scrabbled across the forest floor. She gathered her moaning brother into her arms as she gasped into his neck with relief. It was an utterly wretched scene that was also was a poignant illustration of all that they'd suffered and it pulverized Jacob's heavy heart.

Yet his face betrayed nothing.

Stooping down he snatched up one of the extra pairs of shorts Collin had carried back with his mouth and tossed it to the ground in front of Leah. "Help him get dressed," he murmured, as he turned away from the scene.

Just moments ago he'd coaxed a girl back into her grief-stricken humanity with the added burden of mortification. The fact that her human body was female hadn't bothered Jacob in the least; the fact another life had been shattered and its pieces entrusted to his guardianship had been his only concern. He would have time later to consider how the first female wolf in history would impact the Pack, but one thing was certainly clear: the gods were testing the bounds of his tenuous sanity.

Actually the low rumble of thunder in the distance might well be them all laughing their fucking heads off at his expense. Jacob took a deep resetting breath as he wiped a palm harshly over his face.

When had he become so bitter? Oh hell, it had started with the day he'd been told he couldn't see Bella anymore. And as the days stretched on and he endured his own breaking bones and twisting muscles and stepped into the shoes of his inheritance to chaperone of other initiates to hell, teeth gritted in disgust became par for the fucking course. With the imprint mangling what he'd thought was the last pure remnant of who he'd used to be - his love for her - Jacob had thought his transformation was complete.

Until today.

'She's got shit under control,' was all Paul had said when he'd phased back into the Pack. His thoughts and memories said quite a bit more. It was a relief to them all: Bella had fluently coaxed all the pieces of their Pack into a stabilizing foundation. They didn't need to worry about Brady, or Sam, or even little Claire. In the most tumultuous and traumatic evening of their Pack's existence, Bella had insinuated herself into bonds that held them together with a fluid strength that had hardened like cement.

And she didn't even know it.

But the part of him that was Alpha did. It was the last impartial part of himself that had stood objectively on the sidelines in this battle Jacob was waging inside his heart. But today Bella had proven herself to that leader's instinct as veritably as she had to his Pack this evening. The Pack _needed_ her level head and observant mind. It craved that guileless compassion and strong heart.

And the Alpha in him demanded that Jacob make her Pack.

It sickened him to view Bella through the mercenary lens of leadership too. To protect his people, Jacob had not a qualm in the world about capitalizing on his Pack's weaknesses to build the strength of the whole. He would mercilessly use Quil's eager simplicity or Embry's tender heart or Paul's unharnessed rage or even Sam's psychosis if it padded the odds in their favor.

As Alpha, Jacob was all about results.

He had to be, because the alternative - casualties like Harry or Brady - was simply unacceptable. Like any good leader, Jacob had always been painfully conscious of how many lives he held in his hands.

With the stakes jacked up astronomically by tonight and now a Pack of _nine_ under his care, all three parts of him were now myopically focused on one thing: Bella. She was the woman the man yearned for, the imprint the wolf craved and the mate the Alpha strategically needed for the good of the whole.

It was a battle that pitted need against love.

Bitter didn't even come close to describe what Jacob was feeling at the moment.

"Sue's back, but Charlie's with her," Jared panted as he jogged out of the forest wearing his cutoffs and a grim frown.

Jacob's gaze darted to the two siblings who were huddled in the leaves in a clearing that should have been pitch black but looked dusky to their preternatural eyes. Leah's head jerked up from her brother's quaking body. She glanced first at Jared, then Quil who was trudging from the trees, hitching up his shorts while his gaze stayed trained on the ground.

Her haunted eyes whipped around to Jacob.

"He didn't make it, Leah," Jacob whispered. They'd all suspected this anyway, but Sam had told him an hour ago that Bella had gotten a call from her father confirming the sad news.

For a moment Leah just stared at him - wide-eyed with her lips quivering as the loss of her father crystallized into cold hard reality. Like all of them, she'd been hanging onto the hope for a miracle - Jacob had ruefully let her cling until she'd phased back. It was all about fucking results.

The first of her brother's soft sobs bubbling up from his moans of pain broke her. As tears finally gathered in her eyes she hissed the words like venom:

"I hate you."

Jacob didn't so much as flinch as she glared at him through her desolation before she collapsed in soft strangled cries over her brother in her lap.

He didn't turn away this time, but stoically took the shrapnel of their grief shard by shard. He deserved this pain… all of it. The loss of Harry and Brady's injury were his fault - and his fault alone. He was "management" and he should have seen it coming… reacted faster …done a better job …

There were a host of ineffectual "shoulds" that weighed down his heart. But he couldn't afford to waste a moment on regret - that thing was still out there and there were losses to cut.

"Jared, carry Seth," Jacob whispered, not tearing his eyes from the grieving couple. "Emb, Quil… help Leah."

Leah's red tear-streaked face jerked up. "No!"

"Leah, stop. There'll be time for mourning later," Jacob murmured calmly, letting the Order deepen his voice. He hated to use it, but he did so without conscience when hearts and lives were on the line. "Seth is in pain and your mother needs you," he crooned, holding her gaze while his eyes heated in their sockets. "And my Pack needs me."

Leah's lips trembled over another sniffling sob, but she numbly allowed Jared to scoop up Seth's quivering body into his big arms - the boy still looked small by comparison.

The tension in his Second's jerking movements made him look comparatively clumsy. The same strain that stiffened Quil's spine vibrated deep in Jacob's heart as well. In a time like this, they _needed_ their imprints.

He spoke quietly to that unspoken longing as he turned and started striding into the woods. "You'll have about fifteen at Sam's house before I gotta send you back out."

He felt like he could hear the silent disappointment rallying on both sets of lips, but he was making generous concessions and dangerous wagers already. Even though his instinct told him that the leech wouldn't be back tonight, he wouldn't leave Paul out there alone. There would be two pairs on patrol from now on and Collin's mind and body needed time to recuperate.

Jacob trudged through the woods, gritting his teeth against the pained groans behind him as his Pack helped the two new wolves whose bodies were burning as they struggled to play catch-up to their preternatural change. He measured his breath, even and slow, as he tried to steel himself for what came next.

Even if he hadn't known these woods like the back of his hand, he would have known where to go by that incessant pull at his heart. Now with nothing between him and seeing Bella but a half a mile of distance, that craving rose up like a tsunami, threatening to consume anything and everything in its wake. He'd seen in his Pack mates' minds that the imprint subtly changed its tenor after it was consummated, but up until that point, it was nothing short of unendurable torture.

He _knew_ that now from experience.

It crouched in his gut every second of the day and had pulled him like gravity down to the beach this afternoon. He knew Bella had most of her answers at this point - or the most important ones - and he hoped to high hell she was smart enough to turn tail and run. But Jacob knew her as well as he loved her, and he also knew she'd never turn her back on him even if she refused the imprint.

The problem was there was no middle ground in this thing: it was all or nothing. And Jacob had nothing to give. The only thing she'd asked for was honesty and he hadn't even had the strength for that. He'd let his Pack speak for him like some pussy coward.

Jacob grimaced at himself as he stepped out of the trees and onto the driveway of Sam and Emily's house. Warm welcoming light spilled across the lawn and quiet murmurs of conversation billowed along with the scents of food and Pack and _home_. With a glance over his shoulder at his ragged little party, his feet hastened their step over the crunching gravel.

Sam was at the door immediately, yanking it open with concern etched into his face. His human face. The fact that he'd phased back to human without any other assistance than his imprint was a miracle that Jacob couldn't even appreciate.

Because of that scent.

Ginger flower honey and rich sumptuous cream scorched through his every sense like wildfire. Without even knowing how he got there he was up on the porch with his eyes locked on the woman sitting crosslegged in the middle of living room beside a clearly recovering Brady.

Without thought or consideration, he moved to push past the body blocking the doorway. A firm palm clapped soundly to his solar plexus and loosened a guttural snarl from his chest.

Jacob's burning eyes snapped to Sam who was fearlessly staring him down with hard warning eyes. It was a testament to his Alpha control that his head wasn't bouncing down the porch steps. Jacob's lips lifted from his canines as his gaze forced the man's to the floor.

"Jay," Sam rasped, sounding like speaking was physically painful. "_Easy_."

"Get your fucking hand off me Uley or lose it," he growled like tar bubbling in his diaphragm.

"Jake?"

That voice.

Oh, _holy shit_ that voice. Jacob's gaze was suddenly locked on warm toasty eyes that made him want to cross that room, slither down to his knees in front of her and take solace between her breasts. Sam's hand must have moved (or maybe it didn't and he'd snapped it off, he didn't care) because Jacob took a step into the house under the weight of all eyes in the room.

And then it clicked: like the cold metallic rattle of a shotgun being cocked at his temple.

The imprints were the silver bullet that could bring them all down. And it would only take one: his.

Both Jacob and Paul agreed that the psychotic drive behind the vendetta made it personal - and the most likely scenario was that it was linked to the redheaded female he'd killed just a little over a week ago. That motherfucker had already figured out the Pack mind and it was only a matter of time because he'd be looking for it. A mate for a mate.

Jacob's bare feet froze on the wooden floorboards as his heart finally surrendered and stuttered to a halt. Inside his wolf was reeling violently from the cold hard realization: if he took Bella as his mate, she'd be in the most danger of them all.

Seth's heartbreaking moan jumpstarted it again, and Jacob blinked back to sentience. He was still staring at Bella. She was staring right back from where she was standing in the middle of the room with her hands wound into the hem of her shirt. Her pearly front teeth bit down on her lip as her worried eyes darted to the boy being carried into the room in Jared's arms.

"Is he hurt?" Emily quavered as she stood up from beside Claire on the battered couch in the corner.

"Sammy!" Leah's voice shrieked desperately from outside. "Sammy, take him!"

Jacob whipped around, his neglected duty finally prying his eyes from his imprint. Jared was staring at Kim who was grasping the kitchen doorway with a white-knuckled grip to keep from lunging toward him. Sam was looking to him for permission.

Jacob nodded curtly to Sam and he crossed into the room to take the boy from his arms. It seemed the known familiarity of her ex trumped her resentful grudge in these desperate times and unfamiliar territory.

Jacob could work with that.

"Sam, take him into the back room until we get Charlie to leave," Jacob murmured as stepped to Sam side and clapped a hand on his shoulder by way of wordless apology. Sam met his gaze with vindication in his eyes - if anyone understood what a mind-fuck imprinting was, it was Sammy.

Cocking his head as his assessing eyes washing over the boy, Jacob slipped his palm over the boy's cheek. Seth's face was lined with agony, his muscles were jumping like livewires, while he groaned deep in his throat at what was undoubtedly the ache of growing bones.

In other words, business as usual.

In some ways it was kinder to have it happen this way. He was enduring this torture (that they all knew too well) _after_ the first phase so at least he knew what was going on. Jacob had spent the better part of two hours - while the siblings ran out the churning instinct and fear - filling them in on their fates while he tried to calm them down.

So they could phase back to human to face their father's death.

Leah was pitching heavily up the stairs between Embry and Collin, her frantic gaze trained on the house. As soon as she reached the porch she brusquely shook them off, careening forward on wobbly legs and catching herself against the door frame.

"Get away from him," she hissed.

As his dominant instinct rose up like the indivertible tide, Jacob purposely let his hand linger against Seth's cheek for a moment longer.

Leah pushed off the door and lurched into the room… promptly stumbling forward on her way down to a spectacular face-plant. Jacob's lightning reflexes snatched her up before she hit the floor. He gently pulled her up to her feet while a soft fallow growl percolated in her chest.

She uncharitably tried to jerk her shoulders from his grip. "Fuck off, Black!"

The room went deathly silent.

Jacob shuddered as imperious feral rage slammed into him like a freight train. A snarl ripped from his gut that snapped Leah's head up in shock. Her eyes widened in fear at whatever she saw in face as her body instinctually went limp in his grasp.

Jacob was barely holding himself in check - both the wolf and Alpha in him found the insubordination completely unacceptable, regardless of the context of the woman's grief and pain.

"Leah," he breathed arduously, surprised the word wasn't laced with smoke. He was going to give her one chance to do this without an Order - just one. Not only could he not risk having her legendary mouth tear at his battered Pack, he couldn't afford to test his self-command. Or more accurately, _she_ couldn't.

"Leah," he repeated quietly with a fraudulent calm that masked a tempest - a visceral shudder rippled through a room that heard it anyway.

"You can hate me all you want, but I'm your Alpha," he murmured, looking deeply into her frightened eyes. "And you will _not_ talk to me like that again."

Leah's lips were slack and her labored swallow squeaked in the back of her throat.

Jacob leaned down a little closer to that drawn, filthy face that was valiantly trying to hide both the pain that wracked her body and the fear that whipped her heart into a sprint. _She was strong,_ his wolf mused, now that she submitting to his will. _She could be an asset to the Pack._

As his instinct relaxed its choking hold, Jacob tried to rearrange his face into a more human expression. He let his lips fall back over his canines. "I won't ask you again," he informed her quietly. "Understand?"

Leah licked her lips and jerked her head to the side, her eyes finding the floor in a gesture that looked like resentful human assent. But it was also one of innate submission, so his wolf was appeased; he wondered if she consciously knew she was baring her neck.

Several breaths of relief pockmarked the silence as Jacob slowly let his fingers uncurl from the hold on her arms. Head tucked, Leah stumbled away from him several steps and fell down heavily to her knees.

Jacob met Sam's eyes and jerked his chin toward the back room. With a worried glance at his ex, the man obediently turned toward the hall with her shivering brother held in his arms.

"Lee-Lee," Emily whispered, her eyes darting worriedly to Jacob's as she stumbled across the room toward her cousin. She folded to her knees in front of the girl, her hands hovering uncertainly at the tangled hair covering her bowed head. "Oh Lee, I'm sorry."

Leah sniffled wretchedly as she looked up at her cousin. "Em," she rasped quietly. "I didn't understand." Her shaking hand came up touch the deep scars on her cousins face. "I just didn't understand," she whispered hollowly.

"Shh," Emily soothed, clasping her cousins fingers in her hand. "Let's get you cleaned up, okay?"

"It hurts," Leah whimpered as Emily wrapped her arm around her shoulders and tried to pull her up.

"Embry," Jacob whispered, meeting his friend's gaze with petition. Embry pushed off the wall by the door to help the two women.

Jacob panned the room, silently urging them all to carry on. Like a switch had been flipped, Kim threw herself from the kitchen into Jared's arms while Quil charged through the door on a direct intercept for Claire who stood from the couch with relief shining in her watery eyes.

Jacob's gaze immediately found Bella standing in the exact same position and biting the hell out of her lip. With duty ebbing back again, her sumptuous scent rose up to take its place with compelling seduction.

It was the first time in his tenure as Alpha that he didn't know what the fuck to do.

The feeling made him want to puke. Not only was his body, mind and heart still reeling from the hormones of battle and a host of epiphanies, he realized he had _no fucking clue_ how to act with her around his Pack. Never show weakness?

Bella singlehandedly brought him to his knees.

From around the room, covert glances were cast his way where the two couples were embracing and Embry and Emily were guiding a limping Leah to the hall. Jacob squared his shoulders and crossed the room toward Brady's prone form - his body deep in a restful and regenerative slumber.

Right now duty was his only anchor in the maelstrom that ravaged his soul.

Out of the corner of his eye he could see Bella watching him. Keeping his gaze carefully trained on his Pack mate, Jacob strode to Brady's other side and squatted down beside him. It was symbolic, really: his duty was laid out between him and his own desire.

And she was _so close_.

Jacob's heart thudded uncomfortably in his chest. Just a step over Brady's invalid body and he could pull her into his arms and bury his face in her neck and breathe again.

But he also knew if he did, he'd never let her go.

His hands were shaking like leaves he wanted to reach out to her so badly, so he put them to use and picked up a corner of the blanket to survey Brady's wounds. They were all healed to healthy pink seams that would be faded by morning.

Bella knelt down on the floor across from him. "He's healing," she murmured, trying to capture Jacob's gaze with searching eyes.

Jacob nodded mutely and ran a hand down the boy's shattered leg. They'd removed the brace and the bone underneath was whole. He gently lifted the boy's knee, testing the joint.

"Jake?" she whispered.

That dusky voice felt like it wrapped around his heart with a velvet fist. He could do nothing but meet her cinnamon gaze.

Bella's gaze darted worriedly between his and she licked her lips. His steely eyes snapped down to that luscious mouth like it was a magnet. With her so close, his wolf had come out of his tailspin and was yanking against his rein in patent demand - he wanted to touch her. He _needed_ to touch her.

"Are you okay?" Those lips shaped the words like a caress, warm and gentle and tender. Her tongue quivered at her eyetooth in an unconscious gesture of insecurity that let fire into veins.

_Mine,_ the wolf railed. _We can protect her._

Jacob swallowed down magma as he abruptly stood. "Bella, thank you," he said quietly, feeling all lupine eyes settle on his shoulders like lead weight. "Now you need to go home."

Bella's lashes blinked rapidly as she stumbled to her feet.

"Leah and Seth need to be with Sue. Your dad needs you," he continued in that same stoic monotone. "Can you get him to take you back to Forks?"

With a furrowed brow, for several seconds she just gaped up at him in disbelief. Jacob dispassionately returned her stare while every last synapse sparked in painful rebellion.

Slowly her lips pursed into that stubborn little frown of hers that never boded well… but was also as sexy as hell. Jacob folded his hands in front of hips to mask his body's reaction - a lame attempt when there were lupine noses in the room.

"Sure, Jake," she bit out, crossing her arms over her chest peevishly. "_If you walk me to my car._"

Jacob's nostrils flared as his wolf veritably howled in appreciation of her canny challenge (and the thought of getting her alone). She'd thrown down the gauntlet in front of his Pack; there was no way he could refuse her.

Without a word, he whipped around and strode toward the door.

"Bye Kim, it was nice to meet you," she called with pointed sweetness behind him. "And Claire, tell Emily thanks, kay?"

As the room offered up a tumble of awkward farewells, Jacob pushed through the screen door and held it open on the porch. Seconds later, Bella strode past him without so much as a glance. Her scent was piqued with indignation. It washed over him like Napalm and ignited his body with a thick, viscous want.

She stomped down the stairs with annoyance in her stride and stumbled at the foot in the darkness. Jacob was by her side in an instant, his hand hovering at her elbow teetering on touching her.

_Touch her,_ the wolf purred.

Jacob knew better.

His lips lifted from his canines in defiance as she caught herself on the railing and glanced at him with narrowed eyes. With a little salty humph, she pulled out her cell phone from her pocket and flipped it open, pressing buttons until a soft beam of light fell to the ground from the camera flash.

Silently she picked her way across the gravel with the little swath of light.

Jacob trailed behind her, his hands clasped behind him with white-knuckled determination. He knew her like he knew himself, and she was _so_ going to call him on this.

And Jacob was worried. Because he was reeling inside and with just the slightest touch, he'd be tumbling over the edge into oblivion and into her arms.

And she hadn't decided yet.

And he hadn't given up the battle of giving her an actual choice.

They didn't speak a word until they were at the end of the driveway where a lone streetlight cast a dim phlegmatic glow down the empty back road, illuminating her truck a hundred feet away.

"Can they hear us?" Bella murmured suddenly.

Jacob drew in a steeling breath. "Not if we whisper," he lied. They could if they tried, but after his little show with Leah, he doubted that any of them would be so stupid.

"What the hell, Jake?" she suddenly whipped around on him with a molotov cocktail of hurt and fury flashing in her eyes. "I've been sitting in that house worried to freaking death about you and …" her words stumbled on lips that were curving down with tears and the fire in her eyes went molten.

It was more than he could bear. Eight sets of fingernails popped through the heels of his hands.

And he started walking.

"I'm okay, Bella," he murmured, locking his eyes on the old Chevy like it was the finish line of a double marathon. His head and heart were churning with a million confluent feelings, the spiral greased by adrenaline and worry and rage. He couldn't crumble right now - too many things were up in the air. The problem was, he wasn't sure if he could keep standing either.

So he kept his feet moving on a slow, preternaturally silent pace.

Squeezing his eyes closed, he listened to her heartbreaking sniffles behind him, and then … the petulant stamp of her foot. A ghost of a smile flitted over his lips as his eyes opened again to her truck.

"You said you'd tell me everything," Bella snapped, fury jerking her stride after him.

"Did I?" he challenged provocatively over his shoulder.

With a strangled groan of frustration, she jogged several steps so she was at his side. "Well, you were _going_ to tell me on the beach, weren't you?" she nearly pleaded. "Don't you think you _owe_ me that, Jake?"

Jacob sighed softly as he rolled his lips; he owed her much, much more.

Instinctively shortening his stride to match hers, he looked down at her beside him. That beautiful little face tipped up to him looked so tired and tense it made his chest ache.

"Bella, you already know everything," he whispered, returning his gaze to the fast-approaching vehicle.

"How?"

His brow furrowed as he glanced at her in confusion.

"How do you know?" she clarified.

"Pack mind."

"Pack _what_?" she balked.

The corner of his mouth twitched. "It's like a telepathic connection," he explained to the old Chevy twenty feet away. "I see whatever any phased wolf sees."

"Really?" Bella gasped.

Jacob nodded curtly, keeping his eyes straight ahead.

"In your head... all at_ once_?"

"Yup." The "P" popped with bitterness. _Pack-mind, mind-fuck, same difference._

"Holy crap!" she choked.

He snuck a glance at her as he slowed his step to a stop several feet away from the driver's side of the truck. She was obviously trying to wrap her mind around it, and it was sort of gratifying. She was actually taking the time understand both the trials and implications, but he didn't expect anything less… she'd always been thoughtful.

Bella ran her hand along the door of her truck slowly as she turned to him. "So you saw the stuff this evening through Sam?" she checked, blinking up at him.

Jacob nodded.

Bella pulled her entire lower lip into the mouth and dropped her gaze to the gravel between them, obviously mentally cataloguing all that he'd witnessed.

"Do you get why I've been trying to protect you from all this shit, Bella?" he asked quietly.

She looked up slowly as her plump delectable lip popped free of her teeth. "Yeah," she breathed, meeting his gaze with unfathomable eyes.

Jacob took an unconscious step back. From those lips, from that uncertainty.

"But you know what?" she asked softly, taking a step toward him like they were tied by a string. "They told me alotta stuff, but they didn't tell me what I wanna know." Her brows pinched in the middle as her eyes paced between his. "What I've been asking all along."

The intimacy in her voice was as alluring as her scent that wafted on the breeze. It froze Jacob to the spot where he stood, though he was suddenly struck with the urge to flee.

Bella sniffled softly as she looked up at him with those huge, sincere eyes. _So achingly beautiful._

"Because I know your Pack needs _you_," she continued in nothing but a whisper. "I know Leah needs her _mom_, I know my dad needs _me_ and I know _I've_ got to make a choice about a-…" her voice caught in her throat. "About an imprint," she breathed.

Jacob just blinked down at her, captivated and immobilized by the intensity of her dark endless eyes.

"But Jake," she murmured. "What do _you_ need?"

The question hit him in the gut like a sucker punch, knocking all the air out of him in whoosh. He took a jerking step back while instinct, heart and soul begged him to fall to his knees.

"I don't _need_ you, Bella," he bit out in automatic self defense and instantly his heart constricted in protest. It was a physical pain that made both his gaze and hand reflexively fly to chest.

Bella's pained gasp made his eyes dart back up. Head tucked, she was eerily mirroring him as her palm rubbed slowly over her left breast.

Brow furrowed, Jacob's hand dropped to his side as he took a worried step toward her. "Bells?"

He heard her swallow thickly and then she tipped her face back up, her eyes meeting his from under curling lashes.

"You're a liar, Jacob Black," she whispered.

That hand at her heart reached out to yank open the door of her truck.

Jacob took several steps back as she slammed the door behind her. The Chevy rumbled to life over the roaring of blood in his ears.

It was only after the red tail lights had disappeared down the dark country road, that he finally drew breath into his starving lungs.

And in the middle of the road, in the middle of the night, in the middle of a war... Jacob Black finally crumbled to his knees.

'

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_'_

_Review if you like_


	10. Love Beckons

_I'm behind on replies, but I wanted to get this out… later than I'd hoped. I'll catch up with you soon._

_So this chapter's dedicated to Tayjayfan for her pre-reading and support._

_We start off with another one of my all-time favorite poems. I truncated it for the sake of this story, but it speaks the Truth (imho) about something that is both so simple and difficult and is irrefutably central to all of us. Oh, just a reminder... this story's a romance at its core._

_As always, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy._

'

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'

**"On Love"** - from _The Prophet_, by Kahlil Gibran _(truncated)_

When love beckons to you, follow him,  
Though his ways are hard and steep.  
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,  
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.

And when he speaks to you believe in him,  
Though his voice may shatter your dreams  
as the north wind lays waste the garden.

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you.  
Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.  
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,  
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.

But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,  
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor,  
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter,  
and weep, but not all of your tears.

'

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**Chapter 10 - Love Beckons**

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'

Bella bolted upright in bed.

For a moment she froze in bleary anxiety, her gasping breaths tiptoeing through the darkness as her eyes darted to the green led numbers on the clock on her night stand:

4:07 a.m.

What had awoken her? Hell, she was shocked she'd even fallen asleep.

Charlie and she had gotten home just before midnight and she'd spent another hour just sitting across the kitchen table lending the silent comfort of presence to her grieving father. Finally he'd abruptly stood and, without a word, headed upstairs to presumed bed. Bella had closed up the house and trudged after him.

And spent the next long hours staring at the ceiling of her bedroom… thinking.

Feeling.

_Hurting_.

In these wee hours, last night seemed like nothing more than a nightmare. Bella knew it wasn't. Her head was pounding, her body was stiff and her brain felt like a toxic wasteland courtesy of the surely illegal levels of cortisol and adrenaline that had been sprinting through her veins. But all that was inconsequential compared to that deep throbbing ache in her chest….where her heart used to be. She was pretty sure those words falling from Jacob's lips - _those freaking traitor words_ - had finally shattered it.

"I don't need you."

It was a boldfaced lie.

Even though she knew it was, hearing him say such a thing still hurt. It had _physically_ hurt. Maybe it was her imagination, maybe it was the imprint, or maybe it was just that her heart had been abused enough over the last year and was finally giving up the fight.

Bella felt like giving up too.

She was tired. Bone-deep, soul-weary tired. Rubbing her hand absently over her chest, Bella sniffled wretchedly as her eyes panned the room on her way back down to the pillow on her other side.

Her gaze snagged on a looming shadow in the corner and adrenaline once again charged through her veins. With a squeak of fear, she yanked her knees up to her chest as her hand shot out to the lamp on her side table.

"Shh, it's me," a deep croon washed over the room along with the moon-blue lamplight.

Jacob's new hulking body was leaning against the wall by her open window. His hands caged behind his hips, he was peering up through the shadows cast by that heavy brow.

What was left of Bella's heart had lunged up her throat in a frantic bid to flee. "J-Jake?" she choked around it.

Jacob nodded loosely and bowed his head toward the floor, darkness swallowing his features. Drawing in a shaking breath, Bella cautiously uncurled as she searched for clues and context. Dressed only in cutoffs, the dirty smudges from last night still mottled his skin. The soft light caressed the harsh topography of his form and folded into dramatic shadows nestled into the hard lines of his musculature.

As sentience trickled into her sleepy shock, Bella valiantly tried to tame her body's reaction to the mere sight of that magnificent body. Much to her chagrin, desire still siphoned heat through her veins on the heels of the ebbing icy adrenaline and she shifted in the bed uncomfortably.

She needed to get herself under control - for many reasons, but especially because there was something incontestably hopeless and broken in his stance. His head was hanging and his shoulders were bowed like they'd finally lost battle and caved.

Concerned, Bella pulled her legs under her and leaned her elbows on her knees.

"Hey, 'you okay?" she whispered.

Jacob's thick swallow was audible in the predawn silence. "We gotta talk."

Bella pressed her lips together a moment.

"Yeah, we do," she murmured, as she slowly pushed forward on her hands and knees. Watching him carefully, she left the blankets behind and crawled down to the foot of her bed, slipping her bare legs over the edge and absently wiggling her toes.

On second thought, she reached behind her and pulled her sheet up around her shoulders like a cape. She was certainly decent enough in one of Jake's old shirts and some silky boxers, but every time she was around that glorious body of his, she somehow felt naked.

He didn't so much as glance at her but just stayed pressed up against her wall, as still as a statue.

But now that she was closer, she could see that every last muscle was taut and quivering, the dim light tracing the lithe lines with harsh shadow like a charcoal sketch. Frowning with concern, she took him all in, her gaze automatically slipping down that massive frame.

She promptly yanked it back up to those despondent shoulders while a rush of heat slammed into her cheeks - _all _parts of his body were tense, apparently.

But the stakes were too high right now for prude girlishness, because it was blatantly obvious that Jacob was hurting. For the first time in this whole thing, he wasn't even trying to hide it.

And Bella needed to set her own bitterness and pain aside because _this_ was what she'd been waiting for. It was single fragile moment of time that held both of their hearts in its quivering hands and hanging onto hurt and resentment could ruin it.

Bella drew back her shoulders as she took a deep resetting breath and let all that darkness slip from her shoulders like shadowy shift.

And suddenly Bella _knew_ she had it. She'd _always_ had it where Jacob was concerned:

_Faith_.

Faith in him. Faith in herself. Faith in the filaments of love and acceptance that had knit their hearts together over all these years and were now pulling them closer. She knew beyond a shadow of a doubt he'd never _try_ to hurt her and that he always did his best, but that didn't mean he wouldn't make mistakes.

But she _did_ love him enough. Enough to bet her heart and soul in this thing, even with the odds so stacked toward losing it all.

And she certainly loved him enough to listen.

A sudden soft snore rumbled from her father's room across the hall and finally Jacob shifted against wall with the dry rustle of cloth against sheetrock.

"So talk, Jacob," she urged softly. "I'll listen."

Jacob's body didn't even twitch in response, but his muscles seemed to jump at her offer. She heard the crisp sound of his tongue over his lips in the shadows of his bowed head.

And she waited, pulling the sheets tighter around her shoulders. He'd been through so much this year: did _he_ have enough faith left? Did he have the strength to fight his way back? He'd made it to her room, hadn't he? Or was had he come to push her farther away …

_Faith, Bella._

She could feel the tension in the room threading her heart and cinching it tight - the anticipation was unbearable.

Finally she heard his slow rallying intake of breath.

"I need you."

The words were expelled in a formless rushing whisper and yet still that softness sliced the string restraining her heart. It lunged forward in several giddy skipping beats.

"I _do_ need you, Bella," he murmured as he shifted uncomfortably against the wall. A hand slipped from behind his hips to rake brusquely through his hair and he stole a glance at her from shadow. "So fucking much."

Bella pressed her lips together as she held that bottomless midnight gaze.

"And I don't _wanna_ need you, Bells," he continued quietly, the words tumbling over each other as his face quirked with anguish on its way back down to the floor. He shoved his hand back behind his hips and drew in a deep breath. "All this shit… it's so fucked up," he hissed on his exhale. "I didn't want you to hafta go down with me. It's not fair."

Bella's lips popped open but she caught her words in her throat: he _needed_ her to listen.

"It wasn't s'posed to be like this," he spat, with a terse shake of his head.

He barked a single bitter laugh as he looked back up. "I mean, _finally_ you're home." His eyes met hers and darted intensely between them. "And I coulda _finally_ asked you out. Taken you to some stupid movie… held your hand… kissed you in the Rabbit at the top of the cliffs. Slow, simple… easy as breathing."

"Jake," Bella whispered. Her hands dropped the blanket as she leaned over her thighs. She couldn't stand to see him suffering any more. It hurt… it _physically_ hurt.

He shook his head again as he tipped his face to the ceiling. "I can't even stand it I want you so bad," he breathed as he hit his head against the wall in punctuation.

Bella swallowed, rearranging herself on the bed with the whisper of sheets. She knew the feeling.

"I mean, fuck. Look at this," he laughed caustically as his face tipped down to sneer at the hand he'd ripped from behind his hips. It shook like a leaf like he was some kind of strung out junkie. "I'm going nuts, Bells. Fucking nuts," he shoved his hand back behind him and tipped his face back up to the ceiling. "Just like Sammy."

"I'm sorry," she said quietly, her head reeling and heart bucking in her chest.

"No! I wanted to give you _time_!" he rasped, his impassioned face snapping back with flashing eyes. "I wanted to you give you _time_ to fall in love. To want me like I want you," he paused, licking his lips before his voice softened to a dusky tenor so intimate that it melted the distance between them. "I've _always_ wanted you, Bella. I've loved you since the day I was born…you know that, right?"

Bella blinked at him, every fiber of her being freezing in stunned silence. He'd always been so generous with that heart, he'd told her loved her many times over the years.

But not like this.

Her heart felt like it had plunged down to her toes, pulling a soft gasp from her lips with the force. It arduously tried to climb back up her chest.

"I mean it's so fucking unfair, Bells," he continued in a whisper whose edges subtly hardened. "That I gotta ask you, _right now_, if you wanna choose me for _the rest of your life_," he bit out as his brow furrowed. "That I gotta ask you to _sleep_ _with me_ to do that. That I got nothing to offer if you do… except a fucked up life filled with fucking demons." He pressed his lips together and held her gaze intensely for several heartbeats.

"I wanted to give you more."

His last statement was no more than a breath of defeat as those unfathomable midnight eyes held her captive with their pain. Bella felt like she was trying to swallow down a golf ball. Or maybe it was just the messy ball of angst and ecstasy that knotted in her chest.

She drew in a long, slow breath.

"Jake," she murmured, slipping her bare feet down to the cool hardwood floor. "I don't _need_ more."

Jacob froze. His breath was rapid and shallow and it subtly tugged at those massive stalwart shoulders.

Bella's brow knit as she took a tentative step toward him, and then another.

He straightened up against the wall as she approached him and she struggled to keep her feet from faltering - he looked even taller when she was barefoot and, honestly, he was still a little bit intimidating.

"All I need is you," she continued softly, looking deeply into his eyes. "Right now. This moment… the next. One day at a time. You're right, this is some crazy crap, but didn't we always get through the worst stuff together?" she asked with a raise of her brow. Her feet stopped an arm's length from that body.

His breath was now jerking his pecks in quick jumps like a frightened animal and, like last night, she wanted to soothe him. Touch him.

She _needed_ to.

Jacob blinked several times as her hand tentatively reached out to him.

Like the plasma globe in physics class, it felt like electricity crackled out to meet her fingertips. That tingle siphoned up her arm until she grounded it with skin on skin. Palm to heart.

Bella gasped as her body combusted.

Jacob crumbled like he was made of sand.

Hand riding his chest with his descent, she had to take a step back as he slithered slowly down before her, his breath catching wildly as if trying to slow his fall. His knees hit the floor with a low hollow thump.

"Jake," Bella whispered softly, as she took a step back toward him , tenderly smoothing her palm over the slick smooth skin of his chest.

Slowly, he sat back on his heels, his head bowing along with his shoulders.

"Jacob," she crooned again as her hand slipped over the delectable line of his collar bone to be joined by the other as they fluttered up to cup that angular jaw. Her palms molded to his face with gentle pressure but his resolute chin ignored the petition and stayed tucked to his chest.

She _needed_ to see his eyes.

But Bella was a patient girl, a loving girl - she was starting to truly appreciate that. He needed her, he loved her. He'd finally said so himself. It was a strange and wonderful thing that settled in all the little restless cracks of a heart that had been damaged by blunt force trauma: by long empty days away from her best friend.

The boy she'd always loved.

The man she now craved.

So she softened her hands to cherishing and stroked a soothing thumb over the rough shadow of stubble along his jaw.

And she waited.

Jacob sucked in a hitching breath. "I'm so sick of fighting," he breathed to his lap. "So fucking sick of fighting everything."

"Then stop," she whispered, tipping her head to the side as her gaze followed the slow strokes of her thumb. "Stop fighting, Jacob."

She felt his swallow under her fingers.

"Please," she pled quietly as she again urged his face up with tenderness.

This time he submitted; slowly his face tipped up in her hands.

Their breath caught in unison.

_Those eyes._

With a soft sigh, Bella drowned in the dark yawning oceans of his soul and was lost.

Found.

"Jacob. I love you," she whispered, quiet, but sure and true. Because she did - and monsters and magic and curses couldn't change that, he had to understand. "I'm already _in_ love."

His eyes blinked, sentience surfacing from that same heady intoxication that she felt. His soul still openly displayed, his eyes paced between hers, raw, hurting …unsure. She marveled at such an utterly vulnerable expression set into those severe masculine features. It was the first time she'd seen his heart beat in his eyes since they'd hardened along with his body. She reassuringly squeezed his huge face between her hands.

"I'm all in, Jake," she whispered.

With that she leaned forward to seal the vow into his skin with a kiss. But oh, those russet lips; full, moist, tender. Bella gasped as she brushed her mouth over their warm silken give and suckled the sweetness of his breath over her tongue. It made her head spin and her hands slipped down to his muscular shoulders to steady herself and pry her mouth away.

But his lips followed her flight.

They chased.

They caught her mouth in a soft smacking kiss, dipping up for another as he rose up under her like a wave rearing up from the deep. She rode the swell, tipping her head up to capture more. Warm hands slipped to her waist, brushing up her sides with a hummingbird tremble that sent chill bumps racing down her spine.

Jacob congealed to his feet, his palms slipping up to cup the back of her head as he drank from those silken lips. Sweet and soft like butter mints, they melted under his mouth. He tipped his head to the side to tempt them open.

And magically they parted.

He wrapped her delicate sigh around his tongue like cotton candy and dove into the moist sweetness of her mouth. The warm velvet of her tongue dragged a low growl of ecstasy from his throat and she answered it in a dreamy hum. He broke the kiss to lick it off her lips like raw sugar before he again submerged himself in her warm welcoming mouth.

Her hands felt small and cool as they dug into his shoulders. Stepping closer, her back arched as her body searched for his.

Hunched over as he was, it was out of reach.

Without thought, his hands dragged down the curve of her back, incidentally committing each millimeter to memory. His palms slowed over the feminine flare of her hips; their pert fullness filled his hands perfectly. While his lips continued to explore that giving mouth, he straightened, luxuriantly pulling her up his body like she weighed nothing. He relished the way the supple swell of her breasts caressed the hard ridges of abdomen and chest until they were pressed soundly to his chest. He could feel her heart madly pumping in syncopation with his own as her legs instinctually encircled his waist.

And his body erupted in flame.

"Holy shit."

The curse was ground into Bella's mouth like rock candy, sharp and sweet.

As her heels pressed covetously against his tailbone he pitched forward moving them across the floor. She was entranced by an entirely different movement. With each step, his body rubbed against her, a solid point of heat focused right at the center of the ache between her legs.

_Oh, God that felt good. _

Her hips undulated over the hard ridge of flesh straining at attention over his stomach while she groaned against his teeth. The rhythm was brazen, shameless; excised from inhibition by the heated craving that had blossomed deep within her and _demanded_ satiation.

A tinkling peal across the floor like gumballs made her head jerk to the sound. Her lungs gratefully took the opportunity to yank in neglected oxygen as she glanced at his carved wooden menagerie littering the floor. But Jacob's lips at her neck melted her lids back closed as his hot hard mouth ardently suckled along the line of her jaw. She felt him settle her hips against her cleared desk.

"Too low." His guttural words vibrated in resonance with her pulse and suddenly she was being pulled back up into his arms.

Her hands had been forgotten in overwhelm and now they awoke to the peaks and valleys of his shoulders, fingertips tiptoeing over the flexing play of steel under satin. Hot smooth porcelain nipped into her skin with just enough bite to make her shamelessly moan as she threw her head back. It bonked against… _something_ with a painless thud. But, holy crap, she could care less.

"Jake," she breathed - a prayer and a plea.

"Sorry."

Jacob murmured against the sweet racing pulse up her neck as one hand braced against the wall and he pushed her tiny frame against it.

The way she moved in his arms was driving him crazy.

Sensual, liquid, it was the heated grace of need. She undulated in his arms as she rubbed her crotch over his aching erection while those contrastingly cool hands crept up the taut tendons in his neck to rake across his scalp.

He licked down her throat, greedily siphoning off every last drop of that narcotic taste. Her hands fisted in the longer hairs at the crown of his head, tugging him up boldly and he complied without thought. His mouth pounced on those quivering lips and suckled at her amber honeycomb kisses that drizzled sticky desire down his throat.

_Holy fuck, he was burning._

His hands slipped around to his her hips, caressing the satin over silk and then diving under to smoother petal skin. She sucked in his breath - and he released it willingly - in a sharp gasp as his hands cupped the full apricot of her ass and kneaded while his hips instinctually pushed into the apex of that heat.

Again.

_Oh, fuck._ Another time.

His body moved to a primal percussion that beat with his heart as he ground her into the wall, her legs spreading eagerly in covetous petition for more. Bella broke the kiss as she tipped her head up with his name on her lips, knit from sticky desire.

He nipped at her chin in petition and she graced him again with that solacing mouth as his hips continued to sensuously thrust against her need. She moved with him in concert, like ocean waves against the shore, slow and sumptuous as her unconscious moans leached, lush and warm, into his mouth.

She melted in his hands and bloomed under his demand.

She was his.

_Mine._

That simple truth roared through the marrow of his bones and settled in his turbulent heart like liquid silk, filling in that cavernous space that that had been dry and barren and wanting for far too long.

"Need," she whimpered into the hollow of his craving.

He dissolved the petition over his tongue and swallowed it down as he massaged the want from her mouth in long luxurious strokes that mimicked the sultry sway of their bodies together.

But yet…

That single pleading word - gulped down with an appetent greed - settled in his gut. While he suckled her sighs from her lips it slowly, stealthily germinated into a shoot of sanity.

_Need_.

She _needed_ him.

Crisp and pure, that single sobering truth blossomed deep inside him, flourishing with life and choking out the strangling weeds of lust.

_Not like this. _

Jacob gasped, drawing the intimate life-breath from her lungs.

_He loved her too much for this._

Even while his hands were contemplating the fragile satin membrane between a lowly zipper and where he really wanted to be, his conscience crystallized into protective forbearance.

She was so open, so _achingly vulnerable_. She'd surrendered her body, her heart, her soul into his hands with nothing but the utmost faith. Of all the lives that had been given into his guardianship, this one was - without a doubt - the most precious of all.

And Jacob knew there was no fucking way he'd both take her innocence and join their souls against her bedroom wall…. with her father snoring down the hall.

The priming rhythm of his pumping hips stuttered as his prurient body rebelled, pinning her more soundly against the wall… but it was _only_ his human body and it was _definitely_ her bedroom wall, and there was _no way_ Jacob, the man, was going to let that fly. Shockingly the wolf was in complete agreement, and suddenly he understood just how right his father had been:

It _wasn't_ who he was - man _or_ beast. He was Alpha, and no matter what hormonal or instinctual demons he fought, he was made to protect.

He would always protect her… even if it was from himself.

As that truth settled, sizzling and sparking like rain over the fires of lust, he slowly surfaced from the kiss, bringing her up from the depths to the soft and tender shallows. He stepped back from the wall, pulling his hands from the intimate quick to rest cherishingly over the satin-clad swells of her hips.

"Jake?" she gasped as she pulled her lips from his while she worriedly sought his eyes. He'd felt her body stiffen the moment Jacob had slammed the lid on Pandora's box.

As he turned them both back into the room, his eyelids opened lazily like he was drunk. He certainly was, but he'd always be _just sober enough_ when it came to her.

"Not like this, Bells," he whispered as his smooth gait carried her toward her bed. Erotic frustration escaped in the way he petulantly kicked one of the wooden carvings (he'd made for her years ago) across the floor and it skittered through the silence.

She drew back further as her hands smoothed down the nape of his neck and her assessing eyes darted over his face in confusion. The soft curve of his lips spoke silent reassurance as he leaned in pressed a smacking kiss to the tip of her nose and he lowered her to the bed.

Eyes wide and her body still humming with want, Bella scooted onto the blankets as she watched Jacob rub his face with his palms.

He groaned, stretching his arms up to the ceiling as the muscles rolled in concert down his abdomen. Desire crackled through Bella's body like summer lightning and she dropped her gaze to her knees, reeling and confused. The mattress bounced heavily - making her clear a few inches - and her head whipped around to see him sprawled out face-down behind her. He was so big now that he took up nearly the entire double bed, his calves hanging down over the end.

He groaned again into the mattress and then pushed himself up to his elbows and craned around to meet her eyes with an apologetic squint.

Bella blinked and turned around, crawling up beside him. Her gaze got caught by the mountainous expanse of his broad back and her fingers thoughtlessly traced up his side. He shivered as chill bumps raced like rain over his skin and he reared up to pull her down beside him.

"I can't take any more, Bells," he chuckled as she settled down beside him on her stomach.

An uncertain smile flirted with her lips.

Jacob blinked at her and settled back on his elbows so their shoulders were touching. "I said we'd _talk_," he smiled with one corner of his mouth.

"I was thinking you're a pretty damn awesome conversationalist," she sniffed, bumping his shoulder.

His lips fought a gratified smile as he bumped her back. "It's you," whispered, as his eyes washed over her face. "You make me crazy."

"It's kinda mutual," Bella muttered as her gaze fell to the blankets with a blush. Now that that hormonal kamikaze was ebbing, she realized she'd actually felt pitifully inept in Jacob's arms - his hands and body were so sure.

So delectably sure.

She picked at a thread and flicked from her fingers along with her insecurity.

The thread slithered through the air… the insecurity clung like glue. He seemed like he'd done this before… but Bella was too timid to ask. Right now… _right this moment_ when her body and head were still pitching so soundly with overwhelming desire she could barely tell which way was up. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye and caught him watching her.

Intensely.

Bella scraped her teeth against the corner of her lip nervously. "Um, so what's the deal with Paul?" she asked lamely, her spinning mind picking out the most innocuous and irrelevant (and safe) detail.

Jacob sniffed, shifting beside her. "I gave him an Alpha Order," he said simply in that new deep voice of his.

"Huh?" Bella turned her face to him with a furrowed brow.

His huge arm was reaching toward the dream catcher hanging at the head of her bed. "Alpha order," he repeated as he plucked it from its little yellow tack. "If I tell one of the wolves to do something in a certain kinda way, they hafta do it."

Bella considered that a moment, while she watched him fiddle with the dream catcher. It looked ridiculously small and delicate in his giant hand. That freakishly huge hand that - even though she could feel the fire behind it - had been so gentle.

So sublimely tender.

Bella shifted and reached out and took the dream catcher from that controlled power. Their skin brushed and heat sparkled up her arm, consuming her nerves like detonating cord. Bella grounded the sensation with an absent brush of her foot against his leg while she laid the handcraft on the bed in front of her.

"So is that what you did to Leah?" she asked quietly as her finger traced the tiny intricate web of rawhide and beads.

"No, I don't use it unless I hafta," he whispered.

She could feel his eyes washing over her profile while she nervously studied the handiwork of his younger years. He'd always been meticulous with his carvings or crafts.

"_But_ you told Paul not to talk to me?" Bella realized her toes were still unconsciously wiggling against the silky hairs on his calf and she bent her knees up behind her butt, crossing her ankles.

Jacob sniffed a laugh. "Believe me, _Paul's_ way fucking better off." His leg bumped into hers again, having followed hers unconsciously.

Bella smiled to herself as her toes again molded to his calf, and she handed him the dream catcher. "Why, Jake?" her eyes finally slipped up to his.

Jacob blinked as he reached up to hang it back on the tack, obviously using the task as a stall.

Bella's feet bonked against his a few times with a not so subtle prompt. "Why?" she repeated.

Jacob rolled his lips as he looked back at her from under his dark straight lashes. " 'Cause the wolf can't stand it if _anyone_ messes with you," he admitted sheepishly. "I can't either."

"Jealous?" Bella arched a brow with a goading grin, as their bent legs absently dueled behind them.

Jacob's face instantly darkened with the challenge.

Bella giggled as she leaned into his shoulder - she'd watched that new hair-trigger macho thing of his, and it was really just too fun to play with. Well, as long as she was touching him… when she wasn't it was kind of scary.

Jacob barked a single laugh at his own expense as he relaxed and leaned into her, turning and placing a smacking kiss on her forehead. "Don't tease the animal, Bells," he murmured.

Bella's smile broadened as she leaned her cheek on his shoulder and her bent legs collapsed against his strong calfs. "You don't have to be jealous," she whispered sincerely, rubbing her nose over that smooth musky skin. She sat back up as the heat started rising in her body. "Plus I can handle ole' Lollypop Lahote."

"Shit." Jacob's deep velvet chuckle vibrated the mattress and did funny things to her stomach. "You shoulda seen your face last night, Bells. Fucking priceless."

She knew exactly what he was talking about - _damn wolf-head, pack-mind… whatever it was called._ Bella threw herself over on her back and covered her face in her palms at the memory of a very nude - and _activated_ - Paul Lahote.

Jacob continued to laugh softly as he shifted beside her. Bella felt his big warm hand settle down on her stomach.

"Okay, you got me back," she mumbled into her palms.

"Sorry, honey," the words were murmured in penance over his continued bouncing amusement. "But he likes you. _Respects_ you… and I've never seen Paul respect a girl before."

Bella peeked up at him from between her fingers. He was laying on his side smiling down at her with open, unfettered amusement that was reminiscent of days gone by.

Bella decided _that in itself_ was compensation enough for her mortification, so she let her hands slip down from her face to settle over his muscled forearm. The sensation of skin against skin stoked that flickering flame in her belly higher - she tried to ignore it.

"But seriously, you should take that Alpha thing off," Bella sniffed from around her own residual smile.

"Already done," Jacob quipped with a wiggle of his brow. But slowly his face melted back into those hard serious lines. "Not because I wanna, but because it's dangerous."

Bella blinked, her amusement slipping from her lips.

"Bells, everything I do now I gotta do to keep everyone safe," he said quietly, his eyes growing intense as they darted between her own. "There's still some stuff I gotta tell you." He seemed to falter at the edges of that ominous caveat.

Bella bit her lip as her eyes flitted over the hesitation and the angst that deepened the harsh lines of his face.

"Tell me, Jake," she whispered, squeezing that sinewy forearm.

"It's not just _me_ who needs you, Bella," he said quietly as he leaned his head on his hand. The statement seemed cut from an entirely different part of him, and Bella's brow furrowed as she searched his face trying to understand.

"The _Pack_ needs you," he strung the words on an exhale that made his eyes flutter closed in what looked like regret. "This was the worst fucking night of our lives, and you held us together when everyone was falling apart," he hissed through a grimace.

_That wasn't right, was it?_ "Jake-…" she began to contradict him.

"No," his eyes popped back open and silenced her with the yellow flecks of heat.

Bella stiffened and his hand smoothed soothingly over her side.

"You gotta hear this, Bella," he whispered, scooting closer. "There's three parts of me now - man, wolf, Alpha…" His eyes squinted as he searched her face for understanding. "The _wolf_ chose you last week and _I _chose you a long time ago… but the Alpha chose you _tonight_. We need you."

Bella's lip popped out from her teeth in surprise.

Jacob picked his head off his fist and that hand came down to brush away a wisp of hair from her forehead.

"What you did with the girls, Brady… with Sammy," he pursed his lips with a little shake of his head. "You held it together and every one of the Pack felt it. We've never had that," he paused. His palm smoothed over the crown of her head - cherishing. Apologetic. "We've always needed it."

Bella expelled a breath of discomfort, as she let one hand fall to the mattress beside her with a thump. The other nervously looped under that bicep and clutched his shoulder - holding on. She could hear in his voice somehow that he didn't want this - that part of him wanted to run away and she didn't understand it. Her heart and head was swirling in an incomprehensible mess.

"So is that why you came tonight?" she asked, her forehead crumpling with disappointment. "Because your _Pack_ needs me?"

His eyes grew soft and aching as he shook his head slowly. "Nooo," he dragged the word out on a breath as he leaned in ghosted his nose over her cheek. "I'm just telling you so you understand if you accept the imprint," he whispered over her skin. "I want you to _get_ all the shit you're signing up for." He pulled back and frowned sadly.

"My dad said you'd been _chosen_ for some kinda reason and that you had your own… I think he said… _can o' worms_ to deal with," Jacob's lips twitched on one side.

Bella sniffed absently as she continued to search his eyes… there was definitely more. Much more. "What was I chosen for, Jacob?"

Jacob's teeth dragged at his lip for a moment. "To be the Alpha's mate," he murmured, his voice seemed to inadvertently deepen as his warm hand squeezed her side.

"Well I kinda pretty much felt like a bull in a china closet, but I'm glad it helped a little," she laughed with a self conscious roll of her eyes, instinctively lightening such an ominous assertion.

"You were _awesome_, honey," he countered. And it was such a Jacob thing to say, in such a Jacob voice, that Bella suddenly turned her head into his chest with a little grunt of both giddiness and chagrin.

His big body seemed to curve around her as his lips pressed a tender kiss to her jaw.

Squeezing her eyes closed, she drew in a deep, resetting breath of his delectable heat and rolled back onto her back. She felt his fingers playing with the hem of her shirt - his shirt - and heard his heavy sigh.

Her eyes popped back open, cutting over to him. "There's more, isn't there," she said quietly.

Jacob settled his head back on his palm as he nodded soberly.

"Tell me," she whispered again, shifting so she was facing him a little more.

"It's serious, Bells," he breathed. "And you gotta really think about it." His eyes met hers with somberness that sent shivers down her spine.

She nodded once, as her hand covered his on her side.

Jacob drew in a deep breath. "This leech last night? He's a sick motherfucker. Like psycho-sick," he spat hatefully, his entire countenance changing into something fierce and dark like he'd flipped a switch. "I think he's coming after us because I killed his mate. She'd been _this close_," he picked his head up enough to pinch his fingers together. "… to snatching a kid off the beach last week."

Bella involuntarily shuddered. "Is he the one who killed Harry?"

Jacob shook his head and then settled his cheek back down on his palm. "He'd grabbed him to get to us, but Paul got there in time. Harry really _did_ have a heart attack."

Bella closed her eyes sadly. "Poor Dad," she breathed. "Poor Sue. And Seth and Leah…" she shook her head dolefully back and forth.

"He's fucking with us, Bella," Jacob's voice was nothing but a rasp and Bella's eyes popped back open to a dark scowl. "_Really_ fucking with us. He's looking for ways to make us suffer. Looking for revenge. He's already figured out the Pack mind, and tonight I figured out that it's just a matter of time…"

His deep hard voice shattered like glass on concrete and Bella sucked in a sharp breath as she squeezed his hand.

Jacob had closed his eyes, the muscles jumping in his jaw as his teeth ground in an audible rumble.

"Jake?" she breathed.

Jacob's eyes slowly opened and she reflexively jerked back but his hand stayed locked around her waist. His eyes were smoldering with yellow heat.

It was frightening.

"The imprints." His lips barely moved as that guttural bass escaped from his diaphragm.

Bella's body had gone stiff in his grasp - it felt like his body heat had jacked up another ten degrees. And it was such an odd dichotomy: his body was stretched out on his side, his head still resting in his hand, his face utterly stoic… while those eyes were licked with yellow flame and his heart pounded like thunder.

Her swallow squeaked in her throat as her gaze darted over that dark expression. She realized his breath had gone deep and slow as if he were trying to keep his control. She understood why Emily was so afraid: aside from having seen Sam's loss of control first-hand, the searing power that boiled under that caramel skin was palpable.

But even as his hand firmly clasped her side, his touch was still careful. Gentle. And when they were touching there could be no mistake in Bella's soul that he'd _never_ hurt her, no matter what her mind and human instinct told her.

And she understood his fear: if this vampire was looking for the Pack's Achilles heel and the single most painful thing to bring it down on its knees, that was _undoubtedly_ the imprints. She'd seen the desperation in both Quil and Jared as they'd pulled their mates into their arms, sniffing over their hair and faces with very lupine agitation before drowning them in a kiss that had made her turn her head in embarrassment. She'd seen the power Emily had over Sam and she'd certainly seen what her mere touch did to Jacob.

But what he didn't seem to understand was that their greatest weakness was also their greatest strength.

Drawing in a shaking breath, her hand soothed over the taut tendons in the back of his hand. "I trust you, Jake," she whispered, putting every ounce of faith she had into the heat of her gaze. She picked her head up and pressed her lips to his stoic mouth in a soft kiss, and then slowly settled back to the bed.

His eye blinked rapidly as he looked down at her, each swipe of his lid seeming to sweep away more of that sparking yellow.

"You'll get him before that," she breathed as her impassioned eyes darted between his.

That hand at her side slowly relaxed and then rooted under the hem of the shirt with his fingertips, seeming to draw comfort from the skin to skin. His fingers slowly ghosted back and forth over her stomach, at the same time soothing, settling, _turning her on_ with that calloused gentle heat. Bella's eyes fluttered closed.

"But what about the next one?" Jacob whispered suddenly.

Bella opened her eyes to his intense midnight stare. It was his human fear, not wolvish outrage that was talking now.

"Or the next, Bells?" he sighed quietly. "I mean, I'm gonna make a lot of enemies so if you chose to…" his lips stuttered uncharacteristically. "If you choose to be my … my _mate_…you're always gonna be in danger too."

Bella licked her lips - just hearing him say that word, sent strange tingling jolts through her stomach. They weren't entirely unpleasant. "Embry said you're scary good," she attempted a little smile.

Jacob closed his eyes with dismissive sniff. "I can never be good enough."

Bella frowned, as she absorbed that expression of self-derision on his face. _It wasn't right. _No one was _perfect_… no one _should have to be_. Jacob had a world resting on those broad shoulders and if he didn't accept some help, it was going to break that strong back.

"Here's what I think," she said firmly - snapping open those eyes with her tone. Bella's gaze narrowed with determination. "You're being stubborn and too hard on yourself. You're looking at all the weakness in this imprint thing… and not _using_ the strength."

It was a bold, flat statement. One that called him on his shit, but also inherently offered absolution.

"I mean you saw what Emily was able to do for Sam, right?" she continued with a raise of her brow. "What makes you think I can't help you like that too?"

She saw his lips press together and complexion darken with what must be that reactive macho-thing he had now. Bella decided to ignore it.

"Jake, I _trust_ you," she stated passionately, as her hand reached up to mold to his athletic cheek. "I _trust_ you and your best is good enough for me. Heck I could walk outside tomorrow and get hit by a bus too."

Jacob literally choked, his eyes widening with overstated worry. From what she knew of Sam and her own observations, she was starting to understand what a handicap that powerful protective instinct must be.

"And I've already decided anyway, and you know I'm probably the only person more stubborn than you are," Bella added with a grin, trying to lighten that stricken expression.

It worked… a little.

With a miniscule sniffing laugh, he turned into her hand, finally letting those hard eyes close as he nuzzled her palm. She stroked his cheek with her thumb as he drew in a cooling breath through her fingers.

With a sigh, Jacob collapsed over her, burying his face in her neck while he breathed deeply. Bella's hand slipped up to his short inky hair and just held him.

She let her eyes close as he gathered her tighter in his arms with a little inadvertent grunt.

"Shhh," she crooned, as she stroked her fingers through his silky hair. "C'mon let me in," she whispered. "Please."

Slowly that cagey tension in his body seemed to melt as he released his delicious weight down incrementally to press her into the bed while he breathed, deep and slow, into the crook of her neck. That same strange soft purring sound rose up in his chest, vibrating against her like the patent sound of warmth.

She sniffed. "You're kinda like a cat." The words leaked over her lips without her permission.

Jacob picked up his head slowly with an expression that was a cross between amusement and disbelief. His expression forced a laugh from her throat.

"A _cat_?" he bit out with indignation, although his lips hitched up all the same.

Bella giggled as she pulled a shoulder to her ear. "Y'know, with that purr-y thing…"

Jacob's smile evened out as he rolled back over on his side. His hand left her stomach to smooth her hair back from her cheek. "You make my wolf happy," he breathed as eyes flitted over her face like dragonflies.

Bella leaned into his big hand as her teeth pulled at her lip. "Yeah?" she whispered, her eyes capturing his and holding them. "What about you, Jake?"

Jacob's full perfect lips stretched into a beautiful and unfettered smile as he nodded slowly. "Oh, yeah," he breathed, as his big hand settled against her cheek and he lowered his face toward hers.

Bella sucked in an inadvertent breath as his lips brushed over hers, sweet, caring…tender.

So very cherishing and tender.

He lazily massaged her mouth with his, his tongue lapping over her bottom lip. Her body rose to meet him, arching into the kiss, but he held them both in check by a firm grounding hand that slipped down to cup her jaw.

With a soft grunt, he pulled away, the luxurious cling of skin to skin smacking softly in the silence. His face inches away, she breathed his hot moist breath into her body, relishing the way it filled her and then released her exhale into his lung's petition.

"You make me happy," he barely mouthed the words over her skin and into the intimate space between them. "I haven't been happy in a long, long time."

The admission simultaneously broke and bolstered her heart. "Oh, Jake," she whispered, her hand snapping up to cover his on her cheek.

He pulled back, rubbing his nose softly against hers on the way.

With a little juicy sniffle, Bella blinked at the moisture that had sprung to her eyes. Jacob smiled sadly as his finger slipped up to catch a tear from her lashes. "I wanna make you happy too, Bells," he whispered.

"You do," she rasped in a voice that was choked with emotion - and not terribly convincing.

His brow furrowed as his gaze ran over her face in concern.

"Really, you do!" she nearly wailed, the dam pitted against days of overwhelm and fear and confusion finally broke down in an uncontrollable display. She sprang up and threw herself into his chest, clutching him to her as soft, humiliating sobs shook her shoulders.

Jacob rolled over on his back, his heavy arms encircling her with warmth and comfort as she fought the stress leaking out over his chest.

"I've been so freaking w-worried, Jake," she hiccupped miserably. "I've missed you so, so much and… and -…"

"Shh, honey," he crooned, soothing and strong, as his hand stroked her hair. "I know. It's sucked," he whispered.

Bella nodded against him as she tried to get control of herself. She drew in a hitching breath as her hand slithered under his massive arms to wipe at her nose.

"I missed you every day, Bells," he whispered. "Before the imprint… after. Every fucking minute of every fucking day."

Sniffling ungraciously she picked her head up off his chest, slapping at her tears impatiently. She wasn't a crier… or she didn't used to be. Only Jacob brought out these kind of emotions.

Jacob's eyes were trained on her over the plains of his cheek as he brought his hand up wipe a tear away with his thumb.

"Sorry," she rolled her eyes at herself.

Jacob shook his head absently as he continued to watch her with those unreadable eyes. He used to be an open book, but now…

"You're different," Bella sniffled, reaching up to stroke her fingers over that strong stoic jaw.

"Yeah," he sighed, a tired confirmation that didn't even try to deny the obvious. He brought one arm behind his head, as the other hand rubbed soothingly over her shoulder blades.

"I like it," Bella pronounced quietly, settling her chin on her upturned fist on his chest. She gathered herself and attempted her old lame brand of humor. "I mean, you're still a dork… but now you're an older, bigger, scarier dork."

Jacob snorted as his eyes flicked up to the ceiling. There was a little smile on his lips that was familiar - and just what she was looking for.

"But inside you're still the same, Jake," she whispered, letting her heart leach into the words.

His face slipped back to serious as his eyes paced restlessly between hers.

"And I love you," she breathed, settling her hand meaningfully over his heart beside her fist. "I love who you were _and_ who you are. I just wanted you to know that."

His Adam's apple bobbed with his swallow as his hand slipped from around from her shoulder to tuck her hair behind her ear.

"So you really wanna do this thing?" he breathed, his fingers stroking over her cheek while his eyes held hers captive with their intensity.

Bella drew in a deep breath. "Yeah, I do, Jake," she stated simply, surely. As he blinked she raised herself up and placed a bright smacking kiss on his lips.

But as she withdrew, he sat up along with her.

"Thank you" he whispered, slipping both palms up to cage her face as he brought his lips again to hers.

And. He. Kissed. Her. Senseless.

Firm and demanding but sensual, his mouth moved over hers in long luscious strokes that made her body melt in his arms and her toes curl. There was both desperate need and soulful appreciation in the way his lips both gave and took - it was an intimate conversation that was the culmination of their lives to date and could have taken hours but...

Just as her neglected lungs were starting protest, he ended the kiss, pulling her breathless body back down along with his so she was cradled against his side. She pillowed her cheek on his shoulder while their heartbeats cantered on ahead in tandem.

Jacob's arms wrapped around her as he tilted his cheek down to the top of her head.

"I love you, Bella," he whispered into her hair.

"Mmm," she hummed tipping her face up into his neck and breathing deeply of his heady scent. How could he smell _so good_? Familiar and musky and male and…

"Mine," she murmured into his caramel skin, with no idea where the word had come from, much less why it had appeared on her lips.

But it seemed to be significant because a low growl awoke in his chest. "God, that turns me on," he murmured in a rich sumptuous bass, squeezing her tighter.

It started some kind of crazy chemical reaction in her body and Bella's eyes popped open wide and blinked once in surprise - feeling like somehow she'd suddenly lost control of the situation. Hell she didn't seem to have any control of her body around him. It was a little uncomfortable.

"Are you ready for the rest of this, Bella?" he asked quietly, his voice still strangely dusky and deep.

She nearly choked, in fact she kind of did - a strange strangled squeak escaped her throat.

Jacob sucked in a breath through his teeth and tried to pull back, searching for her eyes, but she pushed her face more into his jaw… humiliated and insecure at the same time.

He quickly stopped pressing and settled back against the pillow, gentling his arms around her. "Bells?" he asked softly. "Talk to me."

She grimaced at herself, because she'd demanded the same thing of him and she hated hypocrites. It just wasn't so easy when it was something that felt so ridiculously out of her depth. She certainly hadn't felt like that half an hour ago when she was shamelessly rubbing herself all over him like some brazen hussy… but that was _then_. And any shame or uncertainty was melted by those arms.

Those very sure and skillful arms.

Experienced?

_Oh, God…_

"I'm a virgin," she mumbled quickly into his neck, beyond mortified.

Jacob's deep chuckle strangely soothed her. "Yeah, well, me too," he laughed.

All embarrassment was razed by shock. "What?" her head shot up to scowl at him in disbelief.

Jacob's lips were stretched into a gazillion kilowatt smile. Just that glorious sight melted any residual shame and discomfort.

"Really?" she asked, her own lips curving up irresistibly in resonance. She loved that expression on his face. And it took on an entirely different tenor in the athletic masculine lines of features now. It was delicious.

"Why wouldn't you think I'd wait for you Bells?" he grinned, smoothing her hair back tenderly from her face.

"Well we never really talked about it and guys… y'know," she tipped her head suggestively.

"I mean, I've fooled around a little, but…" he began in macho defense.

"Boobie what's-her-name?" Bella interjected quickly with a flare of her nostrils.

Jacob laughed, effectively fished free from his descent into belligerence. "Bobbi Brennan? I told you she was just about copping a feel. How about _Enrique Iglasias_?" he pronounced snidely with a theatrical arch of his brow.

"Eric Vasquez," Bella giggled. "I just let him kiss me because he reminded me of you."

"Really?" Jacob looked pleased.

Bella snorted with playful slap against that gorgeous pec as she settled back against his shoulder. A soft sigh escaped her lips as that anxiety fizzled into nothingness.

This felt so comfortable… like the old Jake n' Bells. Even though they'd both changed - and their relationship was teetering on the edges of a profound and permanent transformation - what they'd always had was still intact: friendship.

She'd be lying if she said she wasn't both intimidated and titillated by the almighty and mysterious _sex _looming on the horizon, but this was _Jake_. And he'd been right all those years ago: being with him was as easy as breathing.

"You're on the pill, right?" he ventured softly.

Bella's head jerked back up in surprise. "How…?" she gasped thoughtlessly.

One of Jacob's hands slipped from around her back to tap his nose.

Bella blinked at him for a moment. "You can _smell_ that?"

He wrinkled his nose apologetically.

Bella grimaced and fell back into his shoulder - she didn't want to know what else he could smell. She took a moment to gather herself. "Yeah, mom got it for me a long time ago… I just thought…" she quickly let the rest of that thought dissolve into mortification.

"Shh," he soothed, squeezing her while one hand rubbed over her back. "It's just I gotta be sure. Maybe we can get you on depo soon, though?"

"The shot?" she mumbled.

"Yeah, I got the girls on that. Em was on the pill and couldn't remember to take it," he breathed out heavily. "It's part of this curse."

Bella squeezed her eyes shut, embarrassed but trying valiantly to submerge the discomfort in discussing such a thing with him. It helped that he was so calm… _clinical_ about it. _Gosh, he had to think about this too?_

He let her settle for a while his hand slowly stroked up and down her back. "But are you ready for this, Bella?" he asked again quietly. "We can try to wait…"

Bella drew in a thoughtful breath as she turned her cheek back to rest on his shoulder and slowly stretched her arm over his broad chest. Was she? Could she imagine anyone better to stand beside her when she passed such an important milestone? That answer was a no-brainer.

"I think I'm ready," she breathed. "I mean, I _know_ parts of me are," she muttered wryly.

Jacob sniffed a laugh, but didn't say anything more. He just continued his slow loving strokes down her back and gave her mind space to whirl. He filled the right spaces and left the silence when it was needed. He'd always been good like that.

Bella settled against him, pushing her body against his side. It was only then that she noticed that predawn silence was starting to stir as several lone birds ventured their voices up into the still darkened skies.

"You're dad's waking up," Jacob whispered, as his hand brushed over her cheek. "And I gotta get back."

Sighing, Bella picked her head up and squinted at the clock.

5:03 a.m.

She dropped heavily back onto Jacob's shoulder. "How do you know?" she whined. "His alarm doesn't go off until six."

"His breathing's changing," he murmured, continuing to brush his hands rhythmically over her face, pushing her hair back, tracing her cheek.

Bella released another long heavy breath. She didn't want him to go… and she certainly didn't want to go to school in a few hours.

"Dad's making me go in today," she grumbled petulantly.

"Ouch," Jacob chuckled.

"Tell me about it," Bella sniffled, sitting up enough so that she could see his face. "He thinks it would look bad with that guy's murder on the lake…they're gonna say was an accident to keep people from getting all freaked," she frowned.

Jacob nodded soberly, pressing his lips together as yesterday's events obviously played in his mind's eye.

"And Dad's gotta go to work, so he wants me safe," she continued quickly, trying to pull him past his palpably rising anxiety.

"Now _that's_ a good idea," he smiled softly. "No monsters at school?" he winked, obviously trying to keep things light though she could feel he was slowly starting to be dragged back down into the undertow of all the challenges that invariably lay ahead of him today.

"Well, unless you count this dorky boy who's been following me around," Bella rolled her eyes humorously. She really didn't want to deal with Edward Cullen's neediness today.

Jacob's hand stilled and his face darkened instantly. _Oh crap,_ she'd forgotten about that hair-trigger testosterone.

"Pul-eese, I can handle him," she snorted, rearranging herself in his suddenly stiff arms. "He's just some kinda pasty Abercrombie wanna be."

A low growl percolated under her hands.

"With a shirt!" she teased, trying to lighten him up.

He still looked unconvinced, but suddenly he blinked, his face snapping toward her door.

"Shit," he hissed.

And with a single, head-spinning movement he was vaulting off the bed, somehow extricating himself seamlessly from her arms.

Eyes wide, Bella jerked her head around just in time to see his blurred form dive through her open window as she sat up on her bed in confusion.

Two seconds later, the hinges on her door squeaked.

Bella whipped back around to see her father peeking into the room. With her usual grace, she jerked upright, her hands guiltily straightening her shirt.

Luckily her bleary father didn't seem to notice.

"Uh, sorry," he mumbled. "I didn't know you were up."

"Yeah," Bella rasped, pushing her hair behind her ears nervously. "I couldn't sleep."

Her father grunted noncommittally; he looked like hell himself. "Well, um… I was, uh… just checkin' on yeh," he muttered. " 'Think I'm gonna put on some coffee."

"Okay, Dad," she whispered, heartfelt empathy rising over the guilty adrenaline. "I'll be down in a minute."

"Alright," he nodded loosely, and then pulled closed the door.

Huffing a breath of both relief and sorrow, Bella scrambled off the bed and stumbled toward the window. Leaning on the sill, she looked out over the yard.

"He'll be alright," a low voice soothed below her.

With a gasp, Bella blinked down at Jacob, pulling himself up from where he was hanging from her window by only his fingers on the ledge.

His gaze ran over her face as he leaned into her room for a smacking kiss that magically melted her heartache...just for the moment.

"I can't pick you up today, but I'll get you on Monday," Jacob murmured, pulling back from her lips and seamlessly continuing where they'd left off. "And I'll show Mr. Abercrombie & Bitch what's what."

Bella sniffed a laugh, flicking her eyes up as her both hands came up to his jaw. "I'm yours," she mumbled as she kissed him again. It was the right thing to both to say and do, because his mouth melted against hers longer this time.

"Mmm," he hummed indulgently against her lips.

Bella pulled back, breathless, and her hands smoothed over his cheeks. "Be careful, Jake," she whispered, her eyes darting between his.

"Come by after school?" he asked quietly with a raise of his brow - promising nothing.

"Your dad's?"

"Naw, Sam's… remember how to get there?" he murmured.

"Yeah, I think," she hedged, and then leaned back in for another kiss. This time it was slow and steamy and filled with both worry and longing.

"Ugh," he groaned into her mouth. "You're gonna kill me, Bells."

Bella pulled away with pleased little smile on her lips. She liked that she could make him feel ... like he made her feel. In even in such turbulent times.

A sultry smirk quirked his lips while, in a single lithe movement, he brought his feet up against the house with a soft rasp. "See y'later, honey," he whispered.

And then he pushed off into the air. Like a swimmer from the edge of a pool, his body arched backward in an agile flip that tumbled with mercurial grace to the ground and congealed into a soundless crouch. He looked up at her with lopsided smile that sparkled with boyish pride.

"Show-off," she whispered, not even attempting to hide the awe on her face. His acrobatics were beyond impressive, to be sure, but what was so beautiful was to see him so … free.

He just smiled up at her and then turned on his heel.

Bella locked her elbows and leaned against the sill, watching him jog across the lightening lawn with his powerful liquid gait. For several minutes, she stared at the spot in the woods where he disappeared.

Until a long low howl climbed the sky with the awakening sun.

And in the fledgling dawn, in a beginning that was tainted by endings, in the face of unfathomable uncertainty...

Bella smiled.

'

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Review if you like.


	11. Worlds Collide

_Strap in, I think this one jerks you around a little. _

_FFN doesn't like symbols. I think you'll get my substitutions in the text..._

_Many thanks to Tayjayfan for her emotional support._

_'_

_As always, thanks for reading._

'

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**Chapter 11 - Worlds Collide**

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'

Jacob sprang up from his crouch, the spackle knife falling from his hand as it flew up to claw over his heart. The tool clattered across Emily's living room floor leaving a pasty mess in its wake as he gasped into the dull ache in his chest. He stood there a moment - head bowed, teeth gritted - as he tried to gather himself.

It was the same pain he'd felt last night - like a string moored in the intimate quick of his being had been yanked by an invisible hand. Had his heart finally thrown in the towel? All day - like every other since he'd imprinted - he'd fought the battle against the physical tremors, the emotional yearning… the _craving_ to chase her down. But - _unlike_ every other time he'd battled the wolf since he'd phased - his _heart_ had been swinging alongside him in the ring.

In one night she'd resuscitated it with her promises whispered over his ravenous lips and filled him up with her dusky sighs. She'd said she was all in. That no matter how crazy his life had become that they would figure it out together. That she still wanted to stand beside him.

Like she always had.

For the first time in longer than he could remember, a fledgling faith was daring to bud through the icy crust of hopelessness like a crocus in the snow.

Now it was just down to a war against time: there was less than an hour left on the clock before he could see her. Truth be told, his every sense had been focused outside of Sam's house all afternoon - his face snapping reflexively out to the sound of any vehicle that ventured within a mile of these back roads, while his hand ripped his cell out of his back pocket to check the time … _yet again_.

It was pitiful, really, but Jacob hardly cared. And none of the Pack would dare call him on it, especially because they'd all been solicitously hanging on his every word, desperately leaching off that novel honeyed optimism like they were starving.

Because they were.

They all were. In one night, in one way or another, Bella had gifted every one of them with something they'd been going without for far too long:

Hope - sweet, lush, life-changing.

There was still grief over losses and bitterness over pain as Leah and Seth continued to fight bodies that were playing drastic catch-up, but, by Jacob's order, they were doing it in the relative solace of their mother's house. His cubs' eyes were still dull and glazed by residual trauma, but Brady was walking and he and Collin were quietly reveling in their new status in the Pack as heroes. There were still grueling double patrols and a looming psychotic enemy, but there was also a subtle enthusiasm as each of them came off shifts to beer and stacks of Costco pizza boxes littering Sam's living room floor in the middle of paint cans and jars of spackle. Jacob had _finally_ had the strength to start the project of repairing the damage.

He himself certainly hadn't had any of his own hope to offer over this hellish year. He'd fed his Pack the best he could with the phony saccharine substitute he'd been doling out like little pink packets that he'd pocketed from the Counsel's empty words of wisdom. But with just a sprinkling of the real thing, everything tasted different. And Jacob felt renewed. Therefore so did his Pack.

_Finally_ he understood.

Drawing in a slow breath as he massaged his chest, Jacob hazarded a glance over his shoulder. Five sets of eyes were judiciously trying to stay locked on paintbrushes or sand paper, but the quiet conversation and even laughter - that had only minutes ago threaded the classic rock pounding from the mp3 player - had shriveled up into wary hunched shoulders.

Hope was such a fragile thing.

Jacob willed his hand to drop to his side as he squared his jaw and stooped to pick up the spackle knife. He couldn't shatter now. He was on the home stretch to refilling his tank. All it would take is just a glance into those caring cinnamon eyes.

He still had no fucking idea how he was going integrate his heart with his duty to his Pack and persona as leader, yet that delicate ephemeral thing called hope made all obstacles and uncertainty pale to the plausible.

Yet just as his hand wrapped around the plastic handle, a siren ripped into distance. It shredded the last of his nerves and he bolted upright, his head snapping toward the door while the hairs prickled on the back of his neck. Charlie had been down on the Rez with Jake's father who had artfully convinced him that "Sue and the kids" needed time alone.

He had obviously gotten some kind of call. Which _shouldn't_ be remarkable, but the timing…

Tossing the tool down on the drop cloth, Jacob strode toward the door, heedless of the five heads that swiveled worriedly with him. He paused with his hand on the screen and looked over his shoulder. Collin and Brady were frozen wide-eyed on the floor with sanding blocks and lathes. Emily's lips were white where she held a paint brush against a wall and Embry's brow was crumpled with concern from where he had returned his own knife to the can spackle on the step stool.

"Let's take fifteen," Jacob soothed, though the words snagged roughly in his throat.

With that he pushed out onto the front porch. The screen door clattered behind him as Jacob sucked in fresh air out from under the stifling weight of duty. He jogged down the steps and into the damp grass of yet another overcast afternoon. Blowing a slow breath out from his cheeks, he pulled his phone out from his jeans pocket and clicked the button on the side.

3:19 p.m. (And exactly seven minutes since he'd last checked.)

School was out by now and Bella was on her way. She'd texted him earlier in the day saying she would be there by four.

And that she missed him.

He flipped the phone open and scrolled to the text, just because he wanted to make sure of _something_. _Anything_. There was a slow cold dread that was slithering up his spine and he wanted so fucking desperately to chalk it up to shot nerves.

"c u © 4. miss u. ≤3"

Jacob scowled at the text as he contemplated the number hanging on at the end. Between three _and_ four? School got out at three and it was a forty-five minute drive - longer if Bella was behind the wheel.

He was still frowning at the message as the screen door clattered open behind him and Embry's loping step slipped down the stairs along with the scent of freshly opened beers. Even though none of them were technically old enough to buy, no cashier carded when they looked like they did - it was the only benefit in this hell they could all agree on. Of course, even that was a fucking joke at their expense; alcohol didn't do shit with their metabolisms. But they drank it anyway - it was the principle of the thing, really. It made them feel… like the adults the world had forced them to be.

Jacob reached out a blind hand and Embry slapped a sweating bottle into it. "What's this mean?" he grumbled glancing up as Embry tipped his own bottle to his lips. His friend swallowed noisily and took the phone from his hand as Jacob threw back a swig.

Embry glanced at the screen and then sniffed a soft laugh. He tilted the phone sideways, turning it back out for Jacob with a collegial bump of his shoulder.

"Huh?" Jacob complained, automatically cocking his head sideways like an idiot as he took the device.

"It's s'posed to be a heart," Embry chuckled and then took another sip of beer.

Jacob quickly snapped the phone closed in his fist while he tipped a disconcerted gulp down his throat. The knot of cool liquid palpably squeezed by his own heart which was still aching, but was now also doing a funny flip in his chest.

_She loved him. _

Honestly Jacob still hadn't allowed that truth settle in - he was so deathly afraid it would be taken away. Like everything else had.

Embry's eyes ran over Jacob's profile and his lips silently stretched out into that good-natured smile for which he was infamous.

While Jacob tried to figure out what the fuck to do.

Things were so much simpler before all this shit. He could've sat on the porch beside his childhood friend - who knew _exactly_ how long he'd been waiting for this (all his life) - and bantered around the lame edges of properly-macho triumph while Embry generously ignored his sappy-assed smile. But now…

"You talked to her?" Embry asked quietly.

Jacob blinked as the memory of her hungry silken lips and soft arching body seared through his brain, lighting up his neurons like a Christmas tree. "Yeah," he mumbled as he slipped the phone into his back pocket.

"Yeah?"

Jacob looked back up to Embry's raised brow and sparkling eyes. A reflexive heat pulled his lips up from his teeth. "Yeah," he growled low, only marginally succeeding at keeping the dominion from his tone.

Embry's gaze lowered dutifully as he _valiantly_ tried to tame his grin by wrapping it around the lip of his bottle under the guise of tipping back a sloshing gulp.

"Sorry," Jacob huffed - he actually let regret pepper the word. Their friendship had been stolen from them along with everything else, but still Embry had stood by him all year - just like Bella had. He owed him big time. Fortunately Embry also understood that in Jacob's position, he could never afford to really pay him back.

"We're trying to figure shit out," he mumbled, shoving his hand through his hair.

Embry shifted beside him and Jacob glanced over to the bottle being held out silently while the man's lips tried to smother a full-on grin.

Jacob rolled his eyes and tapped the long amber neck of his bottle to his friend's with an understated clunk. Both men wordlessly tipped their bottles up. The strident buzz of Jacob's cell made him choke on his swallow.

The humor was instantly wiped from Embry's face as Jacob whipped out his phone and flipped it open with one hand. He absently slapped his beer into Embry's offered palm as he brought the device to his face.

"Dad," he gasped, as all the little ominous signs over the last few minutes viscerally cinched together like a noose.

"Jacob." His full name in that deep voice was like a dirge. "You gotta calm down and listen up carefully now."

Jacob turned his back on Embry as his eyes closed in dread.

"There's been an accident, son," he pronounced quietly, obviously understanding that each word was like a bullet. "But Bella's okay."

Every muscle in Jacob's body stuttered to a dead halt. Including his heart.

"She's okay Jake, that's the first thing you gotta hear. Just a lil' bump on the head, nothin' more," Billy soothed like velvet laid over a bed of razors. "Charlie said they took her down to the ER, just to check her over."

Billy paused for a moment and suddenly Jacob heard his own breath dragging against the mic in grating rasps.

"Jacob?"

He was way beyond words - he forced a guttural sound over lips; it sounded like steel grating stone. _There was something more. _ Jacob could hear it in the hesitant quiver of father's tone, in the uncharacteristic rhythm of his words.

"A van lost control down at the school parking lot and it coulda been real bad," Billy drew in a long breath. "But a classmate a' hers pulled her outta the way."

Jacob's molars ground together in a rasp over the sound of the cell phone's seams popping quietly in his grip.

"I called down to the ER just to make sure Charlie'd got it right," his voice grew thin like a whine, or maybe it was just way it filtered through the ringing in his ears. "But that classmate a' hers? It's Edward Cullen. He's goin' to scho-…"

Jacob's eyes popped open as the phone shattered in his fist.

Blood red rage exploded from his epicenter like he was ground zero in a nuclear war. The blistering heat of its backdraft pulled a chorus of distant howls into the sky from the wolves on patrol. At the same time in his periphery Embry's human body dropped heavily to his knees, the bottles falling to the grass with two wet thumps.

As the pulverized plastic in his hand sifted to the ground in tinkling shards that sounded strangely shrill and distinct, Jacob slowly turned around through a world that was crystalline. Each form was sharp and delineated like it was seen through a hyper-focused lens with the contrast and saturation jacked up. Embry was slumped over in the grass panting on hands and knees.

While agitated howls clawed at the sky, Jacob cocked his head as his hands came up to the button of his shorts. Each of his muscles moved in brusque pithy concert, not a tremor to betray the inferno burning him alive

He slipped off his shorts in one lightning move and tossed them high into the air.

"PHASE!" he boomed like a crack of thunder to the three human Pack at the house.

Jacob leaped off the ground, exploding mid-air and ripping the shorts from the air with jaws that were already foaming with fury. With a savage snarl he sprang into the precise direction that was gouged into his heart by instinct and rage:

Forks General Hospital

Bella had certainly been here enough, but she'd never been so…

"Miss Swan, are you nervous?" the nurse asked as she frowned at the flashing green numbers as the blood pressure machine sighed to a stop.

Bella tore her gaze from the figure leaning casually against the wall only twenty feet away. "Um," she bit her lip. "A little."

The woman's brows knit as she gave her a sympathetic nod and pulled off the cuff with the growl of Velcro.

Bella's gaze snapped back to the man who was watching her like a hawk with his strange golden eyes: Edward Cullen.

"Your blood pressure's quite high," the nurse was saying. "We'll check it again in a few minutes. Try to relax."

She had no idea how Edward had gotten here so fast - he hadn't ridden in the ambulance. Yet her mind wryly mused that if the speed of his movements in the parking lot were any indication, maybe he'd run.

Bella blinked and returned her gaze to the woman who was now holding latex-sheathed fingers to her wrist. "Miss Swan, you really need to relax," she was murmuring. "Can I get you some water?"

Bella nodded once as she pulled her arms into her sides and wrapped her hands around her waist uncomfortably. Her heart was going a million miles per hour - she could feel it fluttering like a hummingbird in her chest.

But suddenly - like it had bashed into her ribs in its flight - it stuttered painfully.

Just like it had last night.

With a soft gasp, Bella's hand slithered up to her chest as she curled over thighs. She drew in a slow breath through her teeth as she rubbed over her chest.

"Are you alright Bella?" Her name rolled in dulcet tones from lips that sounded inches away.

Eyes wide, Bella's face jerked up to the sight of Edward standing, indeed, inches away. His pale, perfectly symmetrical face was melted in overstated worry.

Thin lips curved in a worried smile as his hand reached out to touch her elbow - just an innocent friendly gesture of concern. Bella didn't like it - he tried to touch her too much.

"How did you get over to me so fast?" she asked quietly as she subtly shied away, hitching her shoulder to her ear. He took the hint and let his hand drop to the gurney… but he didn't budge an inch.

"I was standing right beside you, Bella," he soothed, his face slipping into that radiant expression that seemed to melt every girl to her knees at school.

Bella's gaze darted over that smooth alabaster skin as his smile deepened into cherubic as if he could will her to believe him.

She wasn't having it. It had all happened so fast but…

"You were standing by your car," she bit out curtly. She'd been watching him stare at her - his favorite pastime - in her truck's sideview mirror while she pulled out her phone to call Jake.

"I was right beside you," he repeated in an anodyne whisper. "You hit your head…"

And she had - she'd cracked it on his _shoulder_ when he'd grabbed her.

It had felt like marble.

Her brow furrowed as her gaze darted between his eyes… his strange golden eyes. Standing this close, she could see that they _weren't_ fake. They were prismatic - not flat and flecked like colored contacts. On the ambulance ride she'd been more concerned with how she was going to call Jacob and tell him she was going to be late since her phone had been left somewhere on the ground by her truck.

And worse yet, how he was going to react when she told him why. He'd thought a scratch on her elbow was bad.

So with all those far more compelling thoughts and worries competing with a suffocating need to see him that had been coiling tighter around her chest all day, she'd filed away Edward's speed as a mystery. One that would just have to wait until after she was in Jacob's arms.

But now…as Edward continued to intone lame deflections about trauma and reassurances that his father was a doctor, her bleary sleep-deprived, adrenaline-overdosed mind _finally_ caught up.

She wished that it hadn't.

Her widening gaze snapped down to watch his empty words move his lips, flashing perfectly straight, perfectly white, razor sharp teeth. Strange teeth.

"Bella," he whispered. It was his touch that snapped her back into the moment. His hand settled on her shoulder in concern while her racing heart upped the ante to wind sprints. Her subconscious had put together all the clues while she'd been distracted and worried about Jacob - super-fast… pale white… hard body… weird eyes…

His hand wasn't _warm_ through the thin knit of her shirt it was…

"I know what you are," she breathed, her entire body stiffening as the realization solidified, clear as crystal.

"What do you mean?" Edward asked, his lips curving in a lame parody of a smile.

And suddenly she could see it: he was _worried_. Not about her, but about what she'd seen.

"Vampire," she whispered, willing her voice to be steady even as she inched away from him. Embry had said that vampires lived in Forks… but in the _woods_. Was this one of _those_, or was it the one who'd been torturing the Pack?

"What? Bella, you hit your head," Edward repeated like she was imbecilic enough to believe him if he said it enough times.

"Get away from me," she hissed.

Bella was just processing the fact he was suddenly - _somehow_ - back up against the wall back when…

"Miss Swan-…"

With a squeak, Bella jumped a foot off the table, knocking the proffered plastic cup from the nurse's hand. Water spilled all over her knee and onto the floor.

"Calm down, child," the nurse soothed as she placed a comforting hand on her back.

Bella shrugged her off, feeling like she was going to jump out of her skin as her frightened eyes again locked on Edward back in his casual position twenty feet away as if he'd never moved.

"I wanna go home," she whimpered, clutching the woman's sleeve as she stooped to pick up the cup. It wasn't her finest hour, but she was only going on an hour's sleep on top of a week's worth of toxic adrenaline.

"Soon, dear," the nurse smiled kindly as she straightened. "Dr. Cullen's on his way."

Bella's frightened gaze snapped back to where Edward was watching her with a furrowed brow. She was going to have to get herself together if she was going to survive this - she was acting like a total lunatic. Vampire or not, they'd never let her go home if she didn't calm down. Her aching heart was racing like she'd downed a gazillion Red Bulls.

She wanted Jacob. She _needed_ him.

"Let me get a rag to clean this up, dear," the nurse said as she gently dislodged Bella's death grip from her sleeve.

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth and wrapped her arms around her middle again as she watched the woman shuffle off.

"Bella, please -"

She whipped back around to find Edward impossibly standing right beside her again.

"I promise I won't tell anyone!" The words tumbled out in a frantic whisper. "P-please… just…"

"Bella it's me… _Edward_," he urged, his face finally betraying agonized anxiety. It was pitiful, really. She knew _who_ he was, it was _what_ he was that was the question. What he'd been all along.

It stopped her in her tracks - she was upsetting him and that couldn't be good no matter _which_ kind of vampire he was. She swallowed thickly. "E-Edward," she stammered.

He nodded quickly, taking a step toward her.

Bella couldn't help that she automatically jerked back but the alternately hopeful and then disappointed look in his eye made something click. He looked… _desperate_. Psychotic people (or vampires for that matter) didn't look _pitiful_, did they? It stoked just a little spark of confidence.

"Look, um… I'm sorry. I j-just need to go home and … and rest." It was all she could come up with to appease him and it was lame, but frankly if he was the "other kind," he'd still stolen Jacob's humanity and she still didn't want anything to do with him.

Edward's face crumpled in tormented regret as his hand came up to rake through his poofy hair that strangely didn't seem to so much as rustle with the motion, now that she was paying attention.

A loud buzz and then a banging door, made both of them turn to see Charlie Swan jogging down long hall from the outside ER entrance. Relief washed over her with each footstep squeaked on the tiled floor. He punched the button on the wall and barely waited until the automatic doors had opened before he shimmied through.

"Dad!" Bella cried, throwing herself off the gurney. Or trying to. A marble hand on her arm stopped her cold.

"You should rest yet, Bella," Edward murmured.

Bella huffed, trying to yank her arm free with a petulant glare.

"Hey Gracie," Charlie called absently to the woman behind the reception desk, his eyes fixed on her.

"Dad," Bella gasped again, as he strode toward her, his face crumpling in a worried frown.

"She's okay, Chief Swan," Edward smiled solicitously, stepping back and finally releasing her arm.

"Hey, kiddo," her father sighed, stepping up to the gurney and wrapping her into an embrace.

Bella collapsed against him, burying her face in his comforting polyester and Old Spice.

"Whoa, you're shaking, baby," he murmured into her hair as his hand rubbed down her back.

Bella realized she'd fisted her hands in his uniform and tried to force them to relax along with the rest of her. Her father pulled back, a hand coming up tenderly to her chin.

"You okay?" he whispered, his eyes darting between hers from under a furrowed brow.

Bella nodded briskly, while she her father released her, stepping back out of his discomfort zone. She really _wasn't_ okay… not really at all. Her body felt like some kind of charred out shell that had been ravaged by a wildfire of adrenaline and cortisol. And she wanted Jake.

She _needed_ him.

"Dad, my phone got left at school, can you call..." she began…before she realized she'd told her father she was going to sleep after school. _Oh, to hell with it._

"Can you call-…"

"My father should be down shortly to check her out, Chief Swan," Edward cannily interrupted, drawing her father's attention as he stepped up with one of those narcotic smiles.

"Oh, you're Edward Cullen?" he asked, stepping back and starting to offer his hand.

"Yes sir," Edward nodded cordially, leaving his hands decorously clasped behind him.

The body language was practiced and smooth, steering the situation away from physical contact. She didn't even think her father was conscious of his own hand switching trajectory to rub against his hip instead.

"Well, uh, thanks for…." her father tipped his head toward her. "I heard it coulda been bad, but you pulled 'er outta the way."

"I was just at the right place at the right time," Edward smiled affably, his eyes darting to Bella with a veiled plea.

"Yeah, he was standing right beside me," Bella joined in, meeting Edward's eyes meaningfully. Maybe if he thought she wouldn't tell anyone, he'd leave her alone.

"Well, that's some good reflexes, son," Charlie nodded.

"Do you want to try this again, Miss Swan?" the nurse called as she approached their strange little party with a glass of water in one hand and a rag in the other.

Bella nodded as she took the offered cup.

"Excuse me," the woman said.

"Oop…" Charlie stumbled back a few more steps as the woman stooped to mop up the water on the floor.

Bella drained the little cup of tepid water, trying to reset. Just having her father here, made her feel immeasurably more comfortable - even if that was just an illusion. She needed to get out of here and Charlie was her ticket out.

She lowered the cup to see her father standing on her other side now and the nurse pulling up the blood pressure cart.

"Let's give this another go?" she smiled.

Bella blinked and handed her the cup, offering her arm while the nurse wrapped the cuff around it again.

"Where's Tyler," Bella asked suddenly, glancing behind her as the adrenaline ebbed enough for her to actually think. The main emergency room could be partitioned into several bays, the curtains were all pulled back to a room empty other than the receptionist up front.

"We took him in the back to sober up," the nurse murmured, pausing to cast a meaningful glance at her father. "We didn't think it would be a good idea to have him in here."

"Got that right," Charlie growled, his hand twitching habitually toward his gun. "I'll have a talk with him later."

Bella started to object but her eyes snapped to the movement at the back door behind her father. A tall blond, _pale_ man, wearing a telltale lab coat and a stethoscope around his neck, was striding into the room. He stopped by Edward - who had returned to his position on the far wall - and leaned in as the boy whispered something by his ear. The man nodded once as he snapped on a pair of green latex gloves.

His eyes darted out an met Bella's and her stomach took a nose dive. With his coloring she would have expected his eyes to be blue, but they were that same strange yellow as all of the Cullens at school. She didn't know why it hadn't struck her beyond odd before. It was so unnatural - why did no one question the fact that they all had the same strange eyes? What did they say if someone did? They bought colored contacts in bulk?

The nurse was just moving around to press the button on the machine when the man spoke.

"That's okay, Gina," he called in a smooth melodic voice. "I'll take it from here."

At the sound, her father whipped around. "Dr. Cullen…" he greeted, rubbing his palms nervously on his hips.

"I heard the Chief's daughter was here," he returned, offering both her father and Bella an overstated gracious smile as he crossed toward them. Edward remained leaning against the wall, his eyes locked on her with an unnerving intensity.

Bella gulped, her eyes finding her lap as her uncuffed arm wrapped around her middle.

"I 'preciate what your boy did," Charlie offered. Out of the corner of her eye she saw him reach out his hand.

"They were both very lucky," Dr. Cullen took it in his gloved palm. She wondered how her father didn't _notice_ how cold and hard it was.

"Bella?"

Bella looked up to see the doctor looking down at her with a serene smile. "I'm Dr. Cullen. You took quite a spill."

"I'm fine," she mumbled, nervously pulling at the corner of her lip with her teeth.

"You will be, I'm sure," he reframed smoothly, as he picked up the clipboard on the edge of the gurney and perused it.

"I wanna go home," she came back quickly, her lip popping free with anxiety.

Dr. Cullen nodded as his eyes ran over the chart and he flipped up a page. "Let's see where this blood pressure is, shall we?"

Something about hearing him say the word "blood" made Bella's heart jump. "N-no… I just want to -…"

"Bells." Charlie's stepped back to her other side as his hand soothed down her arm. "Just hang tight, kid. You' been through this drill." He looked back at Dr. Cullen who was pressing the button on the blood pressure monitor. It groaned to life, starting to cinch the cuff on her arm. " 'There any problems I should know about?"

Dr. Cullen set the clipboard back on its hook and shook his head with a reassuring purse to his lips. "She hit her head, but there doesn't seem to be cause for concern. I may want to keep her for observation to make sure she doesn't have a concussion… for a few hours or possibly overnight."

"No!" Bella literally shrieked. "Overnight?!"

"Shh, baby," Charlie soothed, rubbing her back. "She ain't usually like this," he murmured, looking back at the doctor with worried eyes.

"I think she's experiencing some post-traumatic stress," Dr. Cullen appeased.

"I'm _fine_," Bella nearly wailed, hardly doing anything to help her cause. "I just need to … to go h-home!"

"Bella, you're fine." Dr. Cullen's voice was like a lacing that cinched her up tight along with the cuff. Her gaze snapped from her father up to those eyes that were far too intense for that serene expression. "We can talk about the accident a little while you rest. It will help you to process."

And there it was… each word had a double meaning - offering both an explanation and warning. He was going to keep her here until… until…

Bella's hear felt like it was trying to pound a hole through her ribs. The thought of being alone with either Dr. Cullen or Edward was somehow terrifying and she felt the last restraints on her panic viscerally pop and flutter free.

"I promise!" she shrilled, clutching at her father's sleeve while her desperate eyes tried to covertly bargain. "Please."

The blood pressure monitor beeped and wheezed to a stop.

"Charlie, her BP's very high, I believe we'll need to keep her overnight," Dr. Cullen murmured in a voice of synthetic silk as if she weren't there.

"No," she gasped turning her frantic eyes toward her father. His face was red, his expression showing he felt way out of his depth. She wasn't helping him any either by her meltdown - she'd always had a stubborn little temper, but he'd never seen her lose it like this (for the record, neither had she).

He was frightened.

But so was she.

"Dad!" she nearly shrieked.

"Ah…B-Bells, honey-…" he stammered.

"I think we may need to give her a sedative, Charlie," Dr. Cullen interrupted.

"No!" she shrieked senselessly, her brain disconnecting from her mouth and her heart taking over. **"I need JACOB! !"**

Both men froze, their gazes snapping to her like she'd grown another head. But suddenly Dr. Cullen whipped around. It was such an abrupt change that Bella's gaze darted automatically to where Edward had pushed off the wall, and was similarly tense but looking down at his phone while his fingers flew over the touch screen.

Seconds later there was an ear-shattering boom that vibrated the gurney and stopped her heart. In her fevered racing mind, she thought maybe a bomb had gone off, but as her eyes snapped down to the long corridor, she realized it was just the outside doors being ripped off their hinges.

Because stalking briskly down the hallway, were three broad and towering men. Bare chests flexed to excise every last muscle under glistening caramel skin, they strode with powerful purpose, their movements contrastingly coordinated and smooth. Soothing warmth, trickled into her icy veins, even though each face was etched in something so chillingly dispassionate it could only be adamantine rage and imminent disaster.

_Jacob_.

He straightened to two feet with his shorts still in his mouth. Pulling them from clenched teeth, Jacob stooped to pull them on with steely hands. Not a twitch dared quiver through his muscles as he unfolded from his stoop, his eyes trained on the ER entrance at the back of the hospital and the telltale ambulance and police cruiser parked by the back doors.

The run with his Pack had knit the seams of his control back together and battened down his strategic mind. Oh, this was still a perilous maneuver, but Jacob was way past reckless now.

He was livid.

He hadn't really given consideration to what these parasites did with all their fucking free time. He knew Carlisle was a doctor - and Forks certainly needed them - but in his wildest dreams, he'd never imagined the rest of them would being spending their fucking eternity going to_ high school_.

With Bella.

Back in La Push, the Pack was dutifully on patrol protecting the Rez from their _other_ enemy, but on alert in case this went south. Because the chances that it would were astronomical. In his own game of Russian roulette, Jacob was counting on the Cullens' investment in discretion and peaceful pretenses. He didn't _think_ they'd go to war at Forks General Hospital - he'd just rough them up a bit and leave them with a mess. Jacob's own reputation had been ruined this year several times over - so there was nothing to lose there - and as long as he didn't totally loose it and Phase, a little jail time was all he'd get.

And good luck with that.

The rest could be figured out later because there was only one thing that he cared about at the moment.

Bella.

And making the Cullens pay.

"_Charlie, her BP's very high, I believe we'll need to keep her overnight."_ That motherfucker Carlisle's voice shimmied through the several layers of cement into his preternatural ear, his ominous edict making Jacob's own blood pressure jack up to the bursting point.

"You know what to do?" Jacob growled, taking the first step out from behind the screening trees toward the gravel emergency cul-de-sac.

"I grab her," Embry's words hissed with uncharacteristic acid.

"And I kick some ass," Paul's growl was dripping with relish.

Jacob jerked his head around and fixed him with a warning stare.

Still smirking, Paul's gaze dropped as his hands flew up in mock surrender. "But not A&B," he chuckled. "He's yours, Chief."

_Yes he was_ - Jacob had easily put two and two together on just who her fucking stalker was at school and there were so many things wrong with that picture he didn't know where to begin. His wolf did though - and served up first and fresh was sweet heated _vengeance_.

Jacob whipped back around toward the hospital. "No human casualties and don't snap their arms off or nothin'," he warned under his breath - to himself as much as his Pack. They had to walk a fine line between breaking criminal and natural laws.

"_I think we may need to give her a sedative, Charlie."_

"They're drugging her?" Embry gasped.

_**I need JACOB! !**_

Her fearful shriek ripped through Jacob's tenuous restraint like it was tissue paper and instantly he was charging. _Sprinting_.

"Aww, let's just fuckin' kill 'em," Paul growled hot on his heels.

Jacob snarled murderously as he leaped up onto the platform and lunged for the doors. That they were locked didn't even register as a heavy steel door came off in each hand. He threw them thoughtlessly to the side and prowled down the hall, his Pack mates falling in behind him.

His breath stalled in his chest as every muscle slithered and jumped.

He could _see_ her.

Pale, wide-eyed, fearful.

But sitting on the gurney in the middle of the ER in one blessed piece. That was the only thing that allowed him to keep putting one steady foot in front of the other instead of tearing through this hallway and through each and every throat in that room (but one). He _needed_ this time - to gather the tattered remnants of sanity _yet again_. His wolf was tearing his insides to ribbons, his Alpha instinct the only steel shackle keeping him from exploding in a ruthless melee and slaughtering indiscriminately until the enemy was annihilated and she was safely in his arms.

And he _couldn't_ fuck this up.

She'd never seen this side of him and if he didn't keep control, she could hate him.

Or worse, she could get hurt.

His mind was spinning out leaving blackened brain matter on the roof of his skull as his all senses burned taking in every minute detail all at once while trying brake his plunge into insanity.

_A slickery band-aid backing in the hallway. _

_Bella's rapid panting breath._

_Charlie's shoe scuff marks down the hallway, fresh and matte and his spat curse as he stumbled as if in slow motion toward the other side of the door. _

_Carlisle stepping out of his way and away from Bella._

_And the succulent gingered cream of mate wrapped in the suffocating cloying rot of leech. _

_And fear. _

_Her fear._

Jacob's breath shredded violently through gritted teeth as the scents from the room ahead finally filtered through the medical ventilation and hit him in the gut like a railroad tie.

That combination was an accelerant poured over an already potent explosive mix. Luckily the Cullens had a subtle tenor to their scent that made it marginally possible to temper his bloodlust.

Until one of them stepped in between Jacob and his mate, going down into an aggressive crouch.

Like it was defending a kill.

Or a mate.

_Edward fucking Cullen._

Jacob took the last few steps in one. Shoving his palms into the automatic doors, they crashed open with the piercing snap of the metallic arm and ricocheted off the wall with a boom.

"Jake," Bella breathed his name like a prayer as her fingernails dug into the thin mattress.

Molten eyes snapped up to meet hers from under that heavy brow. His face was stone cold and utterly expressionless which was infinitely more frightening than any other expression she could have imagined.

"Jacob!" Charlie barked, taking the last fearless steps toward him with his hand on his gun.

But it was the chilling hiss that followed on her father's heels that tore Jacob's gaze from hers. And it had come from Edward who was crouched low to the ground between them.

Jacob's lips lifted from his teeth as a savage snarl tore from his chest…

And everything happened so fast.

In one step, a lightning arm swept Charlie against the reception desk with a contrastingly subdued thud.

And in the next, Edward Cullen was being thrown across the room into the cement block wall with a deafening boom that shook the room.

Jacob's massive body moved faster than should have been possible and caught Edward as he ricocheted back down with his hand at his throat. He slammed him back up against the wall with the snapping crack of stone.

Before Bella could even scream she was being swooped up into hot dwarfing arms. They whipped her around, ripping away the tubing from the blood pressure cuff and making the apparatus crash across the floor. Bella's unmitigated terror escaped her lips in a pitiful whimper as a huge hand cupped her head and pulled her cheek to a heaving chest.

"S'okay, sweetheart," she heard a deep voice murmur under her ear.

Her eyes popped open to see the room whipping by in her periphery as a grim silence contracted around the thundering boom of Embry's heart.

"Shit!" Embry's spat as he jerked to a quivering halt, making Bella shriek in panic. As he readjusted his grip, Bella's head fearfully turned out of his palm, looking down the hallway and finding the sight of two figures crouched menacingly in the doorway between them and outside: Jasper and Emmett Cullen from school.

It was like some kind of nightmare.

Breath heaving, Embry lurched backward several steps and then whipped them back around. They were now faced with Paul sprinting down the hallway toward them with murder in his eyes.

Bella screamed.

Embry's body seemed to melt protectively around her as Paul leaped up against the wall beside them, using it as a springboard to lunge toward the two men blocking the door.

Bella craned her head around, her wide eyes struggling to follow his blurred movement that seamlessly congealed into an aerial spinning kick and smashed Jasper square in the face. Paul caught himself against the wall, using it as leverage to throw himself forward to land a punishing blow to Emmett's face.

But Jasper had recovered quickly and grabbed him from behind with steely arms around his chest while Emmett retaliated with several lightning punches to his gut. With a guttural grunt of pain, both of Paul's knees snapped up and kicked out in one brutal movement, sending Emmett through the sheetrock wall with the force and dislodging Jasper's grip.

Paul rolled free and landed in a crouch in front of Bella and Embry while the other two vampires condensed into the same aggressive stance.

"S'gonna take a while," Paul's snarled bitterly out of the side of his mouth. "Take her out front!"

Without word or hesitation, Embry whipped back around - Bella just catching sight of Paul's huge body coiling into a pounce - and they were sprinting back into the ER as the sickening percussion of punches and grunts echoed down the corridor behind them.

The scene in the ER was eerily unchanged. Dr. Cullen was standing near the reception desk, pinching the bridge of his nose. The nurse was still cowering in the corner behind the receptionist who had her hand clawed over her mouth.

And Jacob's massive body was still pinning Edward up against the wall by a merciless fist, his legs dangling off the ground.

"Put him _down_, Jake."

Correction, one thing had changed: her father was now standing ten feet off to Jacob's side. His pistol was gripped in two hands, his arms locked out in front of him.

It was cocked and ready and steadily pointed at Jacob's head.

"Dad!" Bella shrieked.

That voice.

The _fear_ in that voice crackled through his body making every muscle seize like he'd been electrocuted.

For the last minute Jacob had been paralyzed by the war going on inside him. The lupine compulsion just to rip this threat… this _thing_… this _demon_ to ribbons was a heady, heated mandate that human temperance and strategic necessity were frantically trying to undermine with every trick in the book. He felt like he was trying to claw his way up a gravel precipice.

He was teetering dangerously on the razor's edge of losing control… and it was frightening.

Jacob's lips peeled back further from his teeth as his hand tightened its grip around the motherfucker's neck. Little fissures crackled up Edward's face like it was a grotesque mask of marble crumbling under the blunt force of his fist.

And still those piss-eyes stared back - composed, wry… _knowing_. With one stone cold hand wrapped around Jacob's wrist and the other braced against the wall the leech could force him to make a move, but the passivity was calculated. He was _enjoying_ playing the hapless victim.

For _Bella_.

A vicious growl clawed its way up from his gut and Jacob tore his eyes from that silent taunt to glance up into the convex mirror up on the wall. In the nanosecond it had taken for Jacob's eyes to devour the room when he'd entered it, he'd chosen this precise location to throw and pin his prey. He knew that he _had_ to have his back to the sight of both Embry grabbing up his imprint - as well as Bella herself - if he was going to have any shred of hope that he wouldn't just explode in an indiscriminate rampage aimed at decimating anything and everyone who stood between them.

Embry met his eyes in the mirror cannily, cradling Bella to his chest like a child with a tenderness that belied the stark tension in his posture.

"Emb…" Jacob's growl rose up with frustration. He was frighteningly close… _so fucking close_ to losing it and he needed Bella out of here if he did.

Embry had only paused in the doorway only for a second, and at the ominous warning in his Alpha's voice, he bolted toward the back door.

"No! Embry!" Bella screamed as he ferried her across the large room.

"HEY! Where 'you taking her!" Charlie yelled, his pistol, however, not so much as twitching from its target.

"No! Dad!" Bella screeched senselessly again.

Jacob could hear that stress and anxiety had already pushed her past her breaking point several miles back and it stealthily tipped the balance toward fucking the consequences and just ending this fast. He felt drawn and quartered between instinct, sanity and rage and it was literally tearing him apart. His muscles slithered under skin while his bones groaned.

Jacob hauled the leech in his hand back and smashed him back up against the wall with an enraged bellow.

"Jake don't make me shoot!" Charlie yelled hoarsely, the tenor of his voice showcasing just how fast his adrenaline was ramping up to do just that.

But Embry was almost to the door and as long as he got through it, Jacob didn't care what happened next.

The steel door banged open suddenly, and Embry pulled up short, shuffling backward and making Bella squeak in fear as she fell back against his chest from where she was craning around his massive bicep to find Jacob.

"No, you don't want to come in here," a bright and compelling female voice called from behind it. "Just go back to what you were doing, there's nothing wrong."

Jacob could taste the thrall from here and it answered a question that had niggled at the back of his fevered mind: why hadn't other hospital staff charged into this little back-woods ER at the uproar? Because there were Cullens working the other side of that door with their Goddamn mindfucks, that's why.

"Hi Bella," a voice piped with insolent frivolity, as a small dark-haired leech stepped into the room. She was followed by a taller blond who shut the door behind them.

Jacob's nostrils flared as he watched the two women brazenly case the room.

_Fucking cocksucking shit_.

They were totally outnumbered and there was no way they were going to get out of this thing by force without Phasing. That realization unpredictably grounded his reeling instinct and allowed a modicum of sanity to bubble up over the fires of his rage. He would _have_ to hold it together a little longer because Bella still wasn't safe.

"Wow, Edward," the little hobgoblin was chirping like a cricket. "You were right, this _is_ a mess."

"Carlisle," the demon under Jacob's hand croaked.

Jacob's eyes darted back down to that repulsive face that kept cracking and healing, over and over.

"Gracie's going to hit the panic button," he rasped.

"Ah," Carlisle finally found it in him to make a move when his precious reputation was at stake. He turned around to the station, his body language all poise and grace, his words laced with thrall. "Gracie my dear, there's no need for that. Everything's under control."

Jacob's brow furrowed as he tried to keep up with all the little details that were peppering his piqued senses like a sawed-off shotgun. He glanced up into the mirror, taking stock of Embry who had backed up into the far corner, trying to spare Bella the sight of Jacob in the sites of her father's gun with his big body. But, biting her lip determinedly, she was climbing up his chest as she craned around his shoulder into the room.

"Jacob, call your man off please," Carlisle addressed him suddenly, making Jacob's eyes dart across the mirror to meet the leech's gaze. Having ascertained Jacob's strategy, his face was tipped up and speaking to his reflection. "Jasper can help with our …" he cleared his throat urbanely. "…_human_ situation."

Jacob's molars ground together in a petulant rumble. There was no getting around this now. Revenge and retribution would have to kowtow to concession for the moment.

The leech shifted in his hand, and Jacob's gaze snapped back down to the subtle curve of thin pallid lips. Jacob's eyes narrowed as he bared his teeth.

"Don't fucking push me, Cullen," he growled low like tar bubbles.

The taunting parody of innocence that slipped over Edward's features was twice as fucking annoying.

Jacob squeezed his eyes shut while he tried to knit together his frayed control.

"Paul!" he barked.

There were a few more muted thuds and gasps down the corridor.

"Emmett," Carlisle crooned in warning.

Finally silence seeped down the hallway, pockmarked by Paul's labored gasps. In the mirror, Jacob watched the doorway warily along with the rest of the room and seconds later Paul came limping back into the ER - looking like something the cat dragged in - with a contrasting scowl on his face like a petulant child. Right behind him skulked the other two vampires who looked just as haggard, their clothes ripped and torn, but whose corresponding damage was healing in their own freaky Terminator way.

"Jasper would you be so kind?" Carlisle asked quietly.

Without warning the viscous scent of thrall billowed over the room and both of the nurses collapsed like they were marionettes whose strings had been cut.

Jacob's body seized in surprise as his gaze cut over to where Charlie swayed on his feet and shook his head vigorously. With a gasp, Jacob jerked around, leaving his arm across the bloodsucker's throat as his eyes snapped to Bella in Embry's arms. She was blinking blearily, but at his movement quickly perked up to tense attention with a soft gasp of his name that went straight through his heart.

He forced his gaze to the two nurses weren't so lucky: one was crumpled into a heap on the floor, the other sprawled over the desk. Jacob may not know them, but _all_ humans were his responsibility. No matter how out of control he felt, he'd never forget that when it counted. It was tattooed into his soul.

In a lightning move, Jacob ripped the parasite from the wall, fluidly yanking him back against his chest with a strangling forearm braced against his throat.

"What'd you **do**!" Jacob yelled.

"They just sleep, Jacob," Carlisle soothed tranquilly, holding up placating palms. Jacob wanted to rip them off.

Charlie's gun had swung out in the room at this newest development, but now his aim swiveled back steadily to lock again on Jacob.

"Our thrall doesn't seem to work on Charlie and Bella, for some reason," Carlisle mused. "I thought Jasper might have better luck."

Jacob's lips lifted from his canines at the thought of his imprint under the spell of that cocky blond. He was leaning indolently in the doorway with a wry smirk that was aimed his way in brazen provocation.

A guttural growl shredded through Jacob's bared teeth.

"Jake, put him down, son," Charlie soothed, seeming to have regained some of his composure as the tension in the room subtly slackened with the elimination of half of their human audience.

"Dad!" Bella shrieked - obviously not similarly appeased.

Jacob's every muscled jumped as his gaze snapped out to lock with his imprint's. He could feel her ragged panic dragging down each arduous beat of his heart. It was a _physical_ pain - he wondered if she felt it too. His eyes burned as he tried to will silent reassurances through them.

"You want me to take care a' that, Chief?" Paul drawled from where he had positioned himself protectively between Bella and Embry and the room.

"Naw, I'm good," Charlie murmured.

Even 200% focused on Bella as he was, Jacob's lips twitched reflexively at his gaffe as several sniggers burst from around the room. The unexpected humor loosened the noose further and let a little more sanity trickle through the haze of instinct.

With their speed and dexterity it would be child's play to unarm Charlie, but Jacob didn't want to give the man any more reasons to distrust them. He'd already seen too much and he was going to have to take sides in this thing.

Jacob was going to have to do this the old fashioned way.

It took everything he had to pull his eyes from his imprint who was silently struggling against Embry's restraint and settle them on her father.

"Charlie," he rasped, forcing his voice up into a human register from the feral. "You're a smart man. All my life I've seen you get all the facts before you make any kinda decision." He paused, as Charlie's nostrils flared and readjusted both hands more firmly on his pistol. "And you gotta understand… shit here isn't what it looks like."

"Y'know Jake," a bitter smirk hitched up one side of his mustache. "I think I'm figuring that out on my own right about now," he snorted sarcastically. "But one thing I _do_ know is you're outta control." He paused, as his fingers absently lifted and strummed back down onto his weapon. "And you're threatenin' a boy half your size who just saved my girl's _life_."

Jacob's brow shot up, even while his lips lifted reflexively from his teeth at the accusation. Outside of the volatility of the situation, he hadn't considered that Charlie would be feeling _loyalty_ toward Edward.

It hadn't even registered in his brain that this leech had saved his imprint's life. And - it was sick, perhaps - but at the moment he couldn't find a charitable bone in his body knowing that this thing had been sniffing around Bella under the pretenses of school. Jacob was a man first and foremost, and no male would have any fucking problem at all sensing this bloodsucker's _interest_ in her. And that fact simply razed any other considerations to insignificant.

Bella was _his_.

Lupine indignation exploded in his gut and he clamped it down hard. Even still, heat escaped through his teeth in a grating growl.

Charlie's face went stony as his fingers tensed on his weapon.

"This … this _monster_ has been _stalking_ Bella at school! Like she's prey!" Jacob bellowed. "It's sick!"

Charlie's brow furrowed as his eyes darted down to Edward's face in confusion.

"It's not even _human_!" he spat.

"Jacob, that's hardly necessary," Carlisle admonished quietly as he took several steps toward them. "My children have been attending high school like any normal resident. We respect the laws and traditions of -"

"NORMAL?!" Jacob barked a bitter laugh. "You bloodsuckers are _anything_ but normal."

"But you _are_?" Carlisle countered hotly, cracks finally appearing in his placid veneer. "You're young, violent and have no control of your temper, as I believe you've showcased magnificently this afternoon."

"And y'turn into a giant fucking dog," one of the females snorted from the side of the room.

"_Rosalie_," Carlisle cautioned.

"But I don't go put myself in a school full of kids when I'm old enough to -….!" Jacob's yell shattered in his throat in disgusted fury. He clenched his eyes shut briefly as he tried to regain any kind of delusion of control. "How old are you? !" he snarled, tightening his hold on Edward's neck.

The bloodsucker's neck rippled under his palm with his swallow.

"How old!" he yelled shaking him briskly.

"Seventeen," the leech whispered.

"How long!" Jacob countered in a threatening growl, leaning down closer to Edward's face.

It was crumpled in some bullshit melodramatic James Dean expression.

"A while," he bemoaned.

"Jacob, this is not the time or place for this," Carlisle quickly interjected.

But at least Jacob had succeeded throwing enough mud into the water that Charlie's finger clicked the safety back on his weapon. But he kept it steadily aimed.

Carlisle's gaze darted to Charlie, his expression showing he was subtly encouraged that he hadn't completely lost face yet. His eyes found Jacob's and his lips curved in a patronizing smile. "Would you kindly release Edward as a sign of good faith?" he asked silkily, artfully aligning himself with Charlie.

Jacob's body tensed at the mere suggestion, a soft growl scurrying up his throat.

There were _two_ reasons that this was absolutely not going to happen. One: it kept the Cullens on their toes. Even though there was precious little permanent damage he could do without a lighter, it made them edgy to have one their own threatened. Jacob recognized Pack when he saw it, and - while he could respect that - he'd ruthlessly use every fucking possible advantage when it came to Bella.

And, two: there was _no fucking way_ the wolf would let him go.

Not when it's stone cold hands had touched its imprint. Even while Jacob struggled to negotiate the intricacies of diplomacy at this late date, he was still straining with everything he had to keep from ripping out the throat under his fist.

Jacob shook his head tersely. "Not 'til I get what I want."

Carlisle released an urbane (and unnecessary) breath. "Very well," he crooned. "What can we do for you Jacob?" His voice dripped with condescension couched in graciousness.

"Two things," Jacob bit out tersely. "The _first_ is I want Bella and Charlie outta here," he growled, his eyes darting over to where Bella's frightened gaze was still singularly locked on him. Just _that_ made him feel ridiculously better in this thing. There was only _worry_ in those dark traumatized eyes - not an ounce of censure.

She trusted him.

But having her here also made him feel perilously unbalanced.

He wasn't going to lie to himself and say he hadn't botched this thing from the beginning. Storming into a human hospital - sorely outnumbered - to kick a hornet's nest of leeches had to have been his most recklessly stupid idea to date.

And it wasn't like him.

Bella had been absolutely correct in her insight that he was taking all the weakness and not the strength of the imprint. If they'd been bound already, he'd have never been so rash.

The frantic uncontrolled woman she was right now was nothing like who she was either and it was driving both the man and wolf crazy with worry. Together Bella and he were spiraling out of control.

If the imprint had been complete they'd be in this thing together, she would have soothed the wolf enough so that he didn't want to fuck the consequences and commit mass murder to really no logical end. Leaving the imprint dangling like this was _dangerous_ for Jacob… and therefore everyone around him.

Including his imprint.

"Very well," Carlisle folded his hands before him. "Charlie, Bella, you're free to go… _of course_," he added solicitously.

"But they know about us!" the blond bitch screeched with indignation.

"Rose!" Carlisle reprimanded sternly. "We can deal with this later. I'm sure that they both understand the gravity of the situation and just what could happen if they speak of this to _anyone_." That last statement had both an air of endorsement and threat and it made Jacob bristle.

"They won't tell anyone," the dark haired leech asserted in a strange dreamy monotone that drew Jacob's gaze. The woman was staring off into the distance with a glazed look to her freaky eyes.

Jacob frowned and returned his focus to matters at hand. He rolled his lips as he tried to rein in a mind that was spinning in a million different directions. But he knew what he needed to do next.

"Embry, Paul," he barked, a residual growl boiling under the utterance. "Take Bella and Charlie to Sue's house and have my father call a Counsel meeting with the Pack."

His eyes darted out to capture Charlie's meaningfully. "We're going to tell you _everything_," he announced in a bass that rumbled in his diaphragm. "And then _you're_ gonna tell us what side you're on in this war."

The room exploded.

The leech in his hands jerked violently. "They're not safe!"

"_Carlisle_!" Rosalie screeched.

"No! Jake!" Bella shrieked, bucking in Embry's arms so that she slithered to the ground. Still caged in his arms, he struggled to restrain and not hurt her. "Jacob!"

While Jacob continue to wrestle the sniveling leech in his grasp, his entire focus snapped to Bella's wide tearing eyes, the rest of the commotion in the room swallowed into inconsequential.

"I wanna stay with you!" she was shrilling while she flailed against Embry's embrace like a wild child. "I need-…!" her shriek shattered into keening sobs as she futilely fought to reach him while Embry's arms wrapped around her waist and picked her feet up off the ground.

The pull of the imprint was tearing them apart.

It took all of his strength to stay in his human form while the wolf raged with a holocaust wrath within him. She _needed_ to touch him, to ground her terror in his skin and he needed that too…and much, much more. His foot took a step forward.

Jacob whipped Edward's flailing, hissing body between Bella and he like a shield. Like magnets held apart they were viscerally and emotionally slipping and sliding in any direction in a frantic bid get to one another and Jacob had no illusions about what would happen if...

"ISABELLA MARIE SWAN!"

Strangely all the chaos in the room was gathered into the fist of her father's uncharacteristically imperious tone.

Bella froze in Embry's arms, her vacant bloodshot eyes stumbling to where her father had finally lowered his weapon.

"Bella," he said, his voice softening with concern. "Be strong, baby. You can do this."

Bella's widened eyes were greased with tears as they slipped back to Jacob's with that same expression of terror now tinged with rejection.

It effortlessly flayed Jacob's heart.

"Bells," he whispered, his brow crumpling while he tried to keep his emotions from bleeding into his face in front of the enemy. "I _need_ you to be safe."

"Safe? !" Edward laughed maniacally, renewing his struggle. "She's hardly safe-.."

"Edward!" Carlisle bellowed with a strength Jacob had never heard in the impassive doctor.

Edward stopped flailing.

Jacob had barely noticed the struggle. In fact, the entire room and everything in it had been swallowed by those dark endless eyes which had so effortlessly excavated his soul from the tender quick. Bella's lips were trembling, her face red and splotchy while she silently cried, _begging_ him with each hitching breath.

"Need," he mouthed the word soundlessly into that yawning stare.

The word was ferried across the space between them and viscerally gulped down into those cinnamon eyes with several fluttering blinks. It was an intimate conversation between two souls in the middle of a war. He watched his request take root in her heart, blossoming into a tormented acceptance that pushed a renewed fountain of tears freely over her cheeks.

Drawing in a ragged breath, she bit her lip and nodded once, her eyes closing dolefully as she turned into Embry's chest.

And away from him.

Jacob didn't realize how much he had propped up on that grounding stare. As soon as that beautiful face turned away from him, something inside of him snapped and a guttural grating growl boiled up in his chest as his feet took another hazardous heavy step toward her.

Embry's gaze snapped up and met his with unmistakable warning and -like a bubble around him had popped - the world rushed in in a suffocating wave of awareness.

The sickening scent of leech… the coven of goldenrod eyes resting on his shoulders… the very _real_ threat that still loomed over his imprint.

Jacob tore his gaze from his imprint with such force that it felt like his eyes were bleeding. Disoriented, he panned the room of combative expressions while he pummeled his instinct back into its steel cage.

The room had blithely continued on, oblivious to Bella and his silent conversation.

"Bella and Charlie are human," Carlisle was saying as his gaze flicked over Jacob's with detached condescension. "It is Jacob's prerogative to handle things as he sees fit."

Every last being focused back on Jacob - minus one, who was quivering - silent and stiff - between Embry's sheltering pecs. He swallowed thickly feeling alternately like he was steps away from imploding or exploding. Without the nurturance of that one hallowed pair of eyes he felt lost.

And he had to keep it together.

"Jacob?" Charlie's terse voice pulled his eyes back around to the man who was stoically staring him down. He knew his eyes were still licking with yellow flame, but man didn't so much as flinch.

Jacob drew in a long, slow breath shoring himself up with the the man's stalwart stare. He had to admit that his already healthy respect for Charlie Swan had skyrocketed for the way he'd handled this situation. He'd cautiously toed the outskirts of his duty while he waited to see how the cards were going to fall while dealing with an explosive supernatural situation that would have been challenging under _normal_ circumstances.

All without losing his cool or his sanity.

"You'll meet with the Counsel, Chief Swan?" Jacob asked crisply, with words that both acknowledged earned respect and the fact that all the old paradigms were about to be irreparably changed.

The look in Charlie's eyes told Jacob he knew exactly the magnitude of what Jacob was both offering and asking.

"Alright, Black," he pertly replied, but still he innately lowered his gaze under the pretenses of snapping his gun into its holster.

Without another word, Charlie pulled his shoulders back and crossed the room, his eyes locked on his daughter. His face had finally folded into the deep lines of his underlying paternal heartache.

Jacob's eyes darted out to where Bella's shoulders bowed, her breath jerking unevenly with despair and depletion.

The man suddenly stumbled - snapping Jacob's gaze back - as he simultaneously tripped on the blood pressure apparatus and injected a little sliver of needed humanity into the situation.

Paul lunged forward to steady him. "Easy there, Chief," he murmured, looking up and meeting Jacob's eyes with a little smirk.

"Get off," Charlie snorted brusquely, slapping away Paul's hand and taking the last steps to his daughter. "C'mere baby," he crooned, pulling her out of Embry's arms.

Bella stumbled weakly away from Embry and collapsed against her father's shoulder, silent, hollow... broken.

"Shh," Charlie soothed as he wrapped his arms around her and slowly guided her toward the ER doors. Paul paced on ahead, snarling petulantly at Emmett and Jasper who each gave him a goading smirk but backed up anyway. Embry followed behind the two humans closely, his gaze darting out to meet Jacob's with veiled worry.

Jacob nodded a subtle reassurance.

As the ragged little party receded down the hall, they left a dry and brittle silence in their wake. Jacob's gaze panned the room of vampires who stared right on back with various expressions of loathing or annoyance… or - in the case of the little black-haired female - a bright perky smile. Unnerving didn't even begin to come close.

But Jacob hardly cared. He was fighting with everything he had not to chase after that desolate woman whose stumbling footsteps echoed in the hall. Every part of him _needed_ right now to wrap her in the safety of his arms. He'd never let her go.

And in that moment - having watched that strong, smart, spirited girl hobble dejectedly away at her father's side, utterly spent and hopeless- Jacob _officially _decided he was a fucking moron.

He'd misused his power in this thing and it had cost them both dearly. Their relationship had always been based on trust and honesty and not respecting her enough to just lay it all out like she'd asked was an unpardonable crime that broke every last statute.

He'd _betrayed_ her, pure and simple. And - no matter what feverish excuses his heart head come up with - he'd done so out of _fear_.

He hadn't had the faith in the world.. in her… in _himself_, to play this thing right from the beginning and he was ashamed. Yet, as his father told him time and time again, the past was inevitable and regret was just an excuse for procrastinating on what needed to be done to fix it.

So even in the middle of this room full of demons, in this messy bed he'd made because of a long line of shitty decisions that were based on fear, with a psychotic enemy looming in the wings, Jacob was sure of one thing, and one thing only: from here on out things were going to change.

Suddenly the cruiser's engine turned over outside the open decimated doors. The lights and siren blared for a moment as they had been left when it had been hastily turned off - tearing through that viscous silence and his heavy thoughts.

It was like a starting gun.

Without warning Edward jerked violently forward, the force throwing Jacob in his surprise. Twisting his body in the air, he landed in a crouch on the balls of his feet and knuckles.

Jacob looked up with a face that had seamlessly returned to ruthless. His body shuddered as the phase shimmered over his body like a convulsive wretch. He fought to remain in human skin, his muscles fraying, bones audibly groaning like distressed steel. Throwing his head back, he bellowed an earsplitting roar.

Like Jekyll and Hide, Edward had similarly transformed into a sallow monster, his teeth peeled back from razor teeth that were foaming with hissing wrath where he was aggressively preparing to pounce.

"Edward!" Carlisle yelled.

In a preternatural flash Jasper and Emmett were on each side, jerking him up off his feet with harsh biceps looped under his arms.

Jacob didn't know where he found the strength not to phase and finish them all off right then and there.

That was a lie. He knew alright: he found that strength in _Bella_. He'd fucked this thing up enough already.

Jacob's teeth ground together, grating enamel like sawdust over his tongue as he tried to swallow the beast down like hydrochloric acid. From his aggressive crouch, his muscles seizing so violently that they cracked his bones, his hot lupine eyes raked over the parasites around him who had all pushed back further into the room.

The fear that licked those jaundiced eyes - all except one - mollified the wolf just enough that he kowtowed to Jacob's obdurate restraint in the face where Edward had quieted but was staring him down with a hateful sneer.

"Jacob things are deteriorating rapidly," Carlisle wheezed as he shrewdly stepped in to block Jacob's view of his goading comrade.

Jacob's lips lifted from his gnashing teeth. "That second thing," he snapped viciously. "The treaty's fucking OFF. _Obviously_," his lips lifted in a sneer as he tried to keep his voice even. "I'll give you 'til tonight to fucking **leave**… _or we're going to war_."

Carlisle's brow furrowed and he glanced behind him at the rest of his coven and then turned back to Jacob with worried eyes. "We have quite a mess to clean up here and going on ten minutes to account for-…" he began.

"**I want you to LEAVE**!" Jacob roared, lurching up off the floor to his full height. **"TONIGHT!"**

Carlisle took an inadvertent step back. As did the rest of the room.

A thick gelatinous silence suffocated the room. Jacob's harsh jerking breath curdled it like stale coffee in cream.

"Jacob."

Carlisle's whisper bubbled up softly, at strange odds with Jacob's shouted edict moments ago. "Let's meet in two hours at the clearing and we can discuss this further."

"Why would I listen to _anything_ you have to say?" he snarled gutterally, taking a menacing step toward him.

Carlisle fearlessly held his ground, his face tipping up to meet Jacob's burning eyes dead on. "You'll listen, Jacob Black," he crooned quietly, folding his hands in front of him with fraudulent calm. "Because we have a clairvoyant among us."

Jacob shifted on his feet as his face crumpled in a scowl.

"And why we both came," he continued in that strange clammy whisper that was chilled with shadow. "But more importantly - why we _continue_ to stay has everything to do with _Bella_."

It was the last thing he'd expected.

Jacob's body seized as his heart stuttered in his chest at that name laced with such dark portent. His nostrils flared as his entire world seem to reel under his feet with a nauseating vertigo.

Carlisle took a single fluid step forward as he cocked his head, his sulfur eyes burning into Jacob's soul. Each of his next words dropped, crisp and precise, from his lips like a bomb, effortlessly decimating everything else into the blackened trivial.

"You'll need our help if you want to save her life."

'

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_Review if you like._


	12. Ticking Clocks

_Many thanks to Tayjayfan for untiring support._

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_As always, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy._

'

* * *

**Chapter 12 - Ticking Clocks**

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_'_

_Clocks (by Coldplay)_

_The lights go out and I can't be saved_  
_Tides that I tried to swim against_  
_Have brought me down upon my knees_  
_Oh I beg, I beg and plead,_

_Come out of the things unsaid_  
_Shoot an apple off my head and a_  
_Trouble that can't be named_  
_A tiger's waiting to be tamed,_

_Confusion that never stops_  
_The closing walls and the ticking clocks gonna_  
_Come back and take you home_  
_I could not stop, that you now know,_

_Come out upon my seas_  
_Cursed missed opportunities am I_  
_A part of the cure_  
_Or am I part of the disease,_

_You are_

'

The whisper of the shower was tossed with the sloshing tinkle of water as Bella rinsed the soap from her hair. Tipping her head back, she let the spray sluice over her face, sighing into the redemptive caress that washed away the salty stiffness of stale tears. She didn't think she had any left.

Shaking hands smoothed down over her hair, slicking away the remaining suds. She felt like a burnt-out, hollowed wreck. She'd had a complete mental breakdown in the middle of a war - adding her own churning emotions to an already potent whirlpool - and she'd _wanted_ to show Jacob that she was strong.

Never had she so thoroughly screwed things up.

But the violence was shocking, really. She had never felt in any personal danger from the wolves, but the rage and brutality that had ignited around her in that room had been the last straw in a straw house built on the week's trauma and anxiety and it had burned to the ground.

The world as she'd known it had been turned upside down in every way - including her relationship with Jake . And it had shaken her roots from the earth.

Bella felt like she was free-falling.

Her eyes popped open as her hand flew to the tiles to steady her swaying vertigo. Squeegeeing the water out of her face, she turned around and yanked off the shower and stood for several moments, dripping in the chipped enamel tub, while she tried to find a leg to stand on. Her knees were weak and wanted to buckle, but Jacob _needed_ her to be strong.

_She_ needed Jacob.

But he was somewhere, miles away, in the middle of a ruined emergency room full of vampires and Bella was going out of her already loony mind with worry.

"Damn it, Bella," she hissed hatefully. "Freaking pull yourself together!"

Gritting her teeth, she raked the moldy shower curtain open to a room that was just as foreign as the rest of the world right now: Sue Clearwater's bathroom. They'd told her she needed to take a shower - that having an imprint "smelling of leech" was just too hard on the wolves.

Swallowing thickly, Bella grabbed one of the fresh towels from the rack and hastily went through the motions of drying off. As she rubbed the terrycloth over her skin, she realized she couldn't really feel any of it, and it was eerie. She felt numb. Numb and empty. The only sensation left was that dull yawning ache where her heart longed for its other half. It was a physical pain.

She knew it was the imprint, but it had so seamlessly lead her to this place of undeniable yearning, that she truthfully couldn't imagine what life had felt like before. Only a week ago, she'd been dying to see her lifelong best friend, but that feeling had now grown roots in her soul. And, while it should have felt uncomfortable for things to develop this fast, it felt oddly natural. Right. _Needed_. The way things always would have been.

If they'd been given time.

_Now_ time seemed to be the enemy - standing between them like a chasm who's lip was crumbling under her feet toward insanity's freefall.

She needed him.

_Now_.

Blinking rapidly, she clapped the towel over her face. She drew in a long breath from the alien scent of someone else's detergent and willed herself to believe that it was residual water from the shower that leaked into the cotton. With a soft hitching breath, she folded the towel and draped it on the chrome bar, making a concerted effort to hang all her self-loathing and worry along with it.

Sue had given her a sun dress of Leah's - it was the only thing that would fit because her duaghter had been bigger even before she phased. Bella pulled on the solid blue cotton shift and her underwear under it. The dress was intended to hit its wearer mid-thigh, but it came down to Bella's knees. She pulled the little string taut under her breasts and tied it in a clumsy bow - it fit well enough. Reaching up, she wiped a hand across the fogged up mirror over the sink and hazarded a glance at her reflection. Her skin looked pale and there were circles under her eyes. Grimacing at the sallow woman staring back, she combed her fingers through her messy curls until they lay in some semblance of order.

And then she opened the bathroom door.

A soft moan drifted down the gloomy hallway from behind a door to her left. Leah and Seth were up in their rooms - their bodies fitfully unconscious as they struggled to catch up with their transformation. Bella wondered how Sue could stand to be sitting in the Council meeting down in her garage instead of by her children's suffering side.

Another louder hitching cry of pain had Bella fleeing from the bathroom and running down the worn wooden stairs.

Her feet stumbled to a stop on the twisting half-landing. Embry was sitting on the bottom step with Paul standing on the ground floor beside him, his arms crossed over his chest and shoulder leaning indolently against the wall. They were both looking up at her with unreadable expressions that reminded her they'd born witness to just how much she'd lost it that afternoon.

Biting her lip, she took the remaining steps slowly, lowering her gaze to the stairs. Wordlessly, she sat on the bottom step beside Embry and pulled the skirt down over her knees with hands that still trembled. She wrapped them around her waist and leaned over her thighs.

"Well, you smell better," Paul's deep voice noted dryly.

But the familiar snark was somehow like a lifering of comfort. Playing along, Bella lifted narrowed eyes. "Wish I could say the same," she retorted snidely.

A single appreciative laugh burst over his lips and Bella's mouth twitched in resonance as her eyes again found the floor. The more she was around him, she realized he really wasn't as mean-spirited as she'd originally thought - his irreverent (and often inappropriate) humor was his own clumsy way of trying to reach out. She could see it in his eyes.

"You okay, sweetheart?" Embry murmured beside her, elbowing her gently.

Bella heaved a sigh. She really _wasn't_ and wouldn't be until…

"Is he back yet?" Bella mumbled.

"Not yet," he whispered, as his large hand slipped around to rub soothingly down her back. "But we'd know if there was trouble."

Bella nodded numbly as she worried her lip for a moment. "It's all my fault, Emb. I totally screwed that up," she sighed unhappily.

"No you didn't," he bit back, his hand withdrawing.

Her face jerked up to his impassioned scowl . "Oh come _on_… " she rolled her eyes. "I _totally_ lost it! I couldn't even think straight - I was a freaking blubbering mess!"

Embry's brow crumpled as his eyes darted between hers.

"It totally ramped Jake up too," she frowned, pursing her lips against the way they trembled. "I made everything worse!" she bemoaned, her eyes pacing between Embry and Paul. "And I'm supposed to be some kinda woo-woo '_Alpha's mate_,'" she twisted the word sarcastically with a theatrical flourish of her hand.

Squeezing her mortified eyes shut, she collapsed her face in her hands and tried to hold in the self-derision that was threatening to escape in another teary display.

She felt like she'd failed him. Here she'd been begging for Jacob to let her into his crazy world - so she could stand beside him - and when he finally had, she'd totally _choked_.

"Shit, Swan," Paul's snort snapped her face up to where he was smirking insolently. "We _all_ fucked it up. Jake had lost his marbles and was thinking with his balls. And we were all right there with 'em." His smirk turned into a leer. "I mean did y'see Embry running around like a chicken with his head cut off?" he laughed, raising a snide brow at the man beside her.

Embry shot him a withering stare. "And Paul's ass got handed back to 'em with a thanks and a smile," he bit out of a saccharine smile.

Paul slapped the wall hotly as his lips lifted from his teeth. Whipping around, he stomped off into the room as a growl rose up in his wake.

The explosion of self-blame around her instantly submerged Bella's own internal struggles. She sat up more, glancing between Paul's retreating back and Embry's glare after him.

"You guys did awesome," Bella soothed quickly. "I mean, you were outnumbered, right? No one expected them all to be there!"

Embry huffed out a sigh and his gaze slipped back to hers, couched in his residual frown. "It was a clusterfuck, Bella. But after all this shit - especially after last night…we feel so _protective_…" his words sizzled into silence on his tongue.

Bella blinked, her gaze darting between that convicted gaze.

"You're Pack, Bella. Our Alpha's imprint," he hissed softly. "And we protect our own." There was a searing heat to the statement.

Bella's hand slipped over that muscled thigh, instinctually soothing him. He blinked once, a series of complex expressions parading over his face and Bella's lips curved in a reassuring smile.

"Thanks, Emb," she whispered, collapsing against his shoulder and closing her eyes tiredly. "I just wanna help, s'all," she murmured, turning her cheek into the warmth of his skin. Unlike other times when she'd touched him and it felt wrong, this felt… right. He was comforting. She wished Paul hadn't stormed off… because just having him here was too. The dynamic between them all was subtly shifting and the analytical part of her brain was fascinated. Embry had always been a friend but he was feeling more and more like a brother.

Like Pack.

The rasp of wood on wood had Bella's eyes popping open to the sight of Paul, dragging a dining room chair back toward them. She sat up a little more, privately relieved.

He flipped the chair around backward at the foot of the stairs and collapsed onto it, crossing his arms petulantly over the back with a scowl that looked uncomfortable. His ego was obviously using the ruse of bringing a chair to allow him to return to the group.

Neither Bella nor Embry would dream of calling him on it.

"You_ are_ helping, sweetheart," Embry murmured beside her. "A shitload."

Bella looked up to his soft smile.

"Last night… you held us all together," he whispered. "But fights like today? That's _our_ job."

But Bella was a protector too ...in her own way. "Those … those freaking _leeches_ need to _leave_," Bella hissed in defense of her friends.

"I think Jake's telling 'em that right now," Embry murmured, a shadow of worry flitting over his face.

"Is he going to be okay?" Bella whispered, the fire in her words instantly doused by worry.

Embry nodded as his hand snaked out to cover hers on her knee. "He can handle 'em. It'll be a lot easier now that you're safe."

"You guys just need to get laid," Paul purred from his chair.

As heat rushed to her cheeks, Bella's gaze panned out in patent shock.

"Everything'll be better once…" he continued helpfully, plunging his index finger into his fist in a lewd gesture that more than illustrated his point.

"Oh my God!" Bella's mouth popped open in disbelief as Embry's fist shot out in a lightning punch and cracking reprimand. The force nearly toppled the chair.

Sniggers bubbled up gleefully as Paul rearranged himself back on his perch and gave her an unrepentant grin.

"He can't help himself, Bella," Embry snorted.

She shook her head as she tried to suppress her smile. "Maybe we should have Jake put that Alpha thing back?" she teased conspiratorially.

Paul gagged on his residual chuckles in a more serious reaction than she'd intended. She intuitively lightened the taunt. "Or maybe I should just carry a bunch of Tootsie pops in my back pocket," she winked at Embry as she met Paul's gaze with a redemptive smile. "Y'know… keep his mouth busy?"

"I can work with that," he leered, his tongue darting out to lick theatrically over his lips.

"Gah!" Bella choked.

Embry chuckled beside her… and it felt good. Like that stalwart - but sometimes grudging - loving acceptance of both quirks and qualms that came with unconditional love. Like family… like Pack. She wondered if they understood what a gift that was in this thing. Bella certainly was beginning to.

But in some ways, could Paul be right? Would it soothe this longing… this _craving_ for Jake to sleep with him? She hoped it did _something_… because right now, every fiber of her being was yearning for him with a rough abrasive demand that felt like it was slowly whittling away her sanity.

It was getting worse.

She collapsed against Embry's shoulder again as the levity dissipated into sobering reality.

"Sam's here," Paul mumbled - for her benefit, no doubt - just before the sound of the back door proved him right.

Seconds later, Sam and Jared strode into view in the living room.

"They all settled?" Embry asked beside her.

Sam nodded as he crossed toward them. His eyes were singularly locked on Bella.

"Brady's with the girls," Jared provided quietly right behind him. "Quil and Collin are running patrols."

Clapping a beefy hand on Paul's shoulder as he deftly scooted his chair back, Sam shimmied between them, holding out a fist for a knuckle bump with Embry.

But she stiffened as tall, imposing Sam Uley stepped right in front of her. Without a word, he bent down to shockingly press his lips to the crown of her head, drawing an indulgent breath through his nose.

"You okay?" he murmured over her hair.

Beyond disconcerted, Bella could only nod. Sam pulled back with an unreadable look in his eyes.

"Move it, Uley," Jared growled playfully, slapping a palm with Embry as he bumped Sam out of the way. "I can't believe that parasite was dogging you at school," he grumbled, bending down to place a smacking kiss on her temple. The physical contact should have been uncomfortable, but it… _wasn't_. The attention, however, was another matter.

Bella blushed, biting her lip, but was blissfully spared from stammering around something she still truthfully didn't understand.

"Hey!" Jared jumped back. "Did you pinch my ass? !" he gaped, whipping around on Paul.

"It was right _there_," Paul widened his eyes innocently, leaping to his feet and pushing the chair to the side in one fluid movement.

Jared pounced after him and the two of them disappeared into the living room to the sounds of a playful snarling tussle.

"Watch it! Don't break anything!" Sam called after them.

"How's it going out there?" he turned back to Embry with a tip of his head toward the front of the house and the garage where the tribal Elders were meeting with Charlie.

"They're almost ready for us," Embry murmured.

Sam pulled up Paul's abandoned chair and collapsed into it, leaning back and crossing his arms over his chest.

Bella looked between the two wolves, realizing they could probably hear the discussion the Council was having. "How's my dad taking it?"

"His heart's going a million miles per hour, but he hasn't lost it yet," Embry gave her smile and a wink.

"How'd your mom take it?" Bella asked him.

Embry's lips pursed in a frown as his eyes found the floor. "She doesn't know," he whispered.

Bella's forehead crumpled in confusion as her gaze instinctively sought Sam.

"None of 'em do," Sam confirmed in a heavy sigh. "Only the Council and imprints… and now your dad."

That didn't seem right. "Why?" The question leaped her lips before she'd had a chance to rethink it.

"It's a secret," Sam bit out with a bitterness that seeped through the cracks of his habitual stoicism. "And the Council says the less people who know, the more chance it has of staying that way."

A loud thump from somewhere in the living room made Bella jump.

"Okay, you fuckers," Sam growled over his shoulder. "Knock it off!"

Bella wrapped her arms around her middle and leaned over her thighs again, trying to imagine having gone through such a traumatic transformation without her father knowing about it. Truth-be-known - even though she was worried how he'd take it - it was a relief that Charlie was going to know. This whole thing was stressful enough without having to add stomach-clenching lies to the mix. She wondered how these guys did it with the Rez thinking the way they did about them - their parents included. They had enough on their plates without losing whatever kind of home they'd had.

"If my Granma wasn't on the Council, I'd have been shipped off to rehab a long time ago," Jared chuckled, pacing back into view.

"At least they care," Paul snorted, socking his arm with a crack.

Jared whipped around and lunged for final retribution, but Paul evaded with lightning reflexes and a sneaky fist to the gut.

"Paul!" Sam bellowed.

"What? I can't defend myself?" he whined theatrically. "Blamin' the victim."

Sam turned back to Bella with a roll of his eyes. "Sorry Bella, but you're gonna have to get used to these jokers."

Bella smiled. The fraternal banter was actually kind of enjoyable - as an only child she'd always wanted siblings and it looked like now she was actually getting them at this late date.

"They're ready," Jared whispered suddenly.

And like a switch had been flipped, a thick sober curtain slammed down over that boyish exuberance. Even Embry sat up straight, drawing his shoulders back beside her. Bella hugged herself tighter while her heart lunged into a sprint. The atmosphere had calcified into serious and suddenly it was kind of intimidating to be among the four huge muscled men.

"Are you ready?" Embry asked quietly beside her, obviously sensing her discomfort.

Bella bit her lip and nodded, trying her best to make it true.

A minute later Joe Whitehorse opened the front door with a jerk of his chin. "The Council asks for the Pack."

Jared stepped forward with a curt nod and then glanced over his shoulder at Bella.

"And the girl," the older man amended.

"Bella _is_ Pack," Jared asserted, turning back to the man with a frown.

Joe's gaze darted to Bella and then he turned out of the doorway without another word.

Embry slipped down to the floor and turned, offering Bella a hand while the other three seemed to innately coalesce into a solid group. Bella took his hand and let him pull her up. She smoothed the dress down with nervous palms as he guided her toward the door with a warm hand at the small of her back.

And that was how she found herself leading four towering men toward the imposing circle of eleven dour Elders (and her father) sitting in a semi-circle of metal fold up chairs in the Clearwater's carport.

Bella's gaze panned the various weathered faces - most of whom she knew, but not in this context. Even Cody had a grim frown crouched in the folds of his many years. With increasing anxiety, her gaze slipped over each set of hard eyes while she tried to cajole her feet into not turning and running the other way.

It was Billy's relaxed and reassuring smile that allowed her to draw a deep resetting breath into lungs she suddenly realized were starving. But the expression on her father's face next to him made her stomach plunge back to her toes. Sitting on the edge of his seat as stiff as a board, his face was drawn and pale as his lips pressed into a severe line under his mustache.

When they were less than twenty feet away, Jared slipped to her side with a staying hand on her shoulder and stepped in front of her.

"I speak as Second," he said calmly in his dusky baritone, folding his hands behind his back.

Old Quil nodded curtly from the middle of the group and then turned to meet Bella's gaze. "The girl sits with her father," his shaking voice announced with no preamble.

Surprised, Bella's gaze darted out to where Charlie was staring back at her with barely tempered stress beside the telltale empty chair. Jared turned around and met her gaze with searching eyes. He would let her decide.

It seemed so much like taking sides - the human Council on one side of the Clearwater's yard, the Pack on the other, an unspoken divide burning between them - and Bella didn't like it. But her father was obviously teetering on the edges of losing it, like she had just an hour earlier, and she couldn't afford a repeat performance.

She needed to get him on at least _one_ of these sides, for her own sake as well as Jake's. She needed to be smart about this.

"He's worried," Bella whispered to Jared by way of apology.

Understanding blinked into his gaze and he nodded subtly.

All eyes on her, she stumbled across the distance and was met halfway by Charlie's smothering embrace.

"Bells," he breathed, pressing his lips to her hairline. His body was shaking.

"C'mon Dad," Bella whispered, guiding him back to his chair. Grasping his hand in hers, she sat down beside him and looked up to all eyes of the Council fixed on them both.

Old Quil nodded once and then returned his gaze to the wolves out in the yard. The four of them were standing, imposing and proud at militant attention. Not a trace of the juvenile humor and camaraderie of moments early was found in those hard glittering eyes.

And It felt uncomfortable - like they were on trial or something.

In a flash of insight, she realized that the Council themselves were uneasy around the Pack and it created a rift between them and what they should be doing: sympathetically supporting boys - and now a girl - who'd had their very lives and self-determination ripped out of their hands by a supernatural _curse_ (as Jacob called it). It was a stark metaphor for the battle that she'd seen played out in Jacob's very heart: the war fought between their human selves and their animal souls.

Instead of helping the Pack accept what they were by exemplifying a nurturing acceptance themselves, the Council was making things worse because of their own fear.

Indignant heat welled up in her chest: they should know better.

"Jared," Old Quil spoke again - gathering all the tension between the two groups in the fist of his gravelly voice. "We ask that one of the Pack show your Spirit Form to Police Chief Swan."

Jared nodded curtly and turned to the three men behind him.

"I'll do it," Paul grumbled, seeming to be singularly unaffected by the terse wariness across the yard. She supposed it made sense with what she knew of his life; he was used to being on the wrong end of respect.

Like a panther, Paul stalked into the space between his Pack and the Council, a ghost of a smirk hitching up one side of his mouth as he panned the group. His eyes ended in Bella's as his hands came up to the button on his jeans shorts. He gave her an audacious wink and jerked down the zipper.

Blushing furiously, Bella's gaze dropped to her lap. _One_ eyeful of Paul Lahote was more than enough.

"HOLY SHIT!" Her father's hoarse curse sounded like it had been ripped from his chest as he bolted to his feet and protectively in front of her. His hand went for the gun at his hip and Bella was springing up to his side, her hands grasping his forearm.

"No, Dad," she choked, clinging to him as her gaze darted out to the massive grey beast that was facing her father down. The wolf's lips lifted from gleaming canines with a petulant growl.

"You knew about this?" he rasped, looking down at his daughter with wide saucer eyes.

Bella bit her lip and nodded. "I figured it out last week," she breathed.

"I'm getting you outta here," he announced suddenly, wrapping his arm protectively around her shoulder and conspicuously avoiding the eleven sets of human eyes that were weighing heavily on them.

Paul's wolf growled low - a grating sound that raised the hairs on the back of her neck - as he crouched down to the ground. The eleven humans behind her palpably stiffened.

"Paul!" Jared barked.

The wolf didn't so much as blink as his heated lupine stare pinned her father. The animal was already edgy around the fear and emotion and - combined with that protective instinct - this situation could spell disaster. Not that she had the slightest worry that even volatile Paul would injure one of them, but if things became too contentious, Charlie would never be able to accept all this craziness.

And he'd never be able to accept Jake.

"No, we're not," Bella returned flatly, slithering out from his grasp. She glanced at the Council who were all sitting ramrod straight with their eyes now trained on the huge beast snarling in the grass. They didn't _trust_ the wolves… that was the problem.

But she did.

"They protect us, Dad," she raised her voice, making it clear she was addressing the them as well. Lifting her chin, she took a step out toward the agitated wolf who was now pacing back and forth like a caged animal.

"Bells!" Charlie choked, reaching out and grabbing her upper arm.

The grey wolf snarled savagely in response, making her father freeze. Her heart making a lunge up her throat, Bella looked over her shoulder and met her father's frantic gaze. "Let me go," she whispered tensely.

"You ain't goin' any closer to that thing, Bella," he rasped.

"Dad, _please_," she begged him to understand with her eyes. "_Please_, do you trust me?"

The question stopped Charlie in his tracks. His eyes flitted over her face, his sharp mind undoubtedly piecing together the plea behind her words. "I trust _you_…" he mumbled peevishly.

Bella nodded encouragingly. "I trust _them_, Dad," she whispered.

Charlie swallowed thickly as his eyes darted between hers for a moment. Finally, his fingers uncurled from her arm - she wasn't sure he was going to be able to do it. She quickly took the step down from the carport and into the grass, not giving him a chance to reconsider.

"Charlie," Billy's voice murmured a warning as she heard his chair squeaking forward. "Give 'er a chance, now."

He must be running interference behind her, but Bella didn't care. Eyes now locked on the towering wolf - who'd stopped his frenetic pacing - she took slow steps toward him, reaching out her hand.

"They won't hurt humans, they're _protectors_," she whispered as the silvery beast lifted his snout to the air with the stretching of licorice nostrils.

The animal chuffed softly, tossing his head before stretching it out toward her approach. The silence was deafening as she took the remaining few steps and her fingers ghosted over the sleek snout. The wolf slithered down to its haunches with a rumbling sigh that vibrated under her fingertips as she stroked them up his muzzle.

Bella took another step toward the beast as the wolf snuffled delicately over her neck with warm moist puffs of air.

And then he licked a huge slovenly tongue up her cheek.

"Eww!" Bella shrieked, slapping his snout pertly and then wiping the slobber from her face. "Paul!"

"Even as a wolf," Jared muttered out of the side of his mouth.

Bella looked up to find that he was standing right behind her - protectively, she realized. They all still didn't trust _themselves_.

Bella turned back around to show them that she did. "Lollipop Lahote," she whispered, gently smoothing her hand over his fierce brow as those yellow eyes snapped back to hers from where they were glaring at his packmate.

Looping her arm over that massive neck, Bella hazarded a glance over her shoulder at the eleven humans who were watching their interplay with various expressions of unmitigated shock. Bella cleared her throat uncomfortably, instinctively leaning into the animal's side.

Her father was gaping at her - mouth slackened under his mustache - from where Billy had wheeled to his side and still had a restraining hand on his forearm.

"This is impossible," he wheezed, his wide bloodshot eyes darting from her back to his friend. "Why didn't y'tell me none of this?"

"Like we said, it's a secret, old friend," Billy murmured, releasing her father's arm to fold his hands in his lap.

"Does Police Chief Swan know about the leech who's threatening the Pack?" Jared asked the Elder Ateara in smooth formal tones.

"He knows everything," Old Quil replied. "And has agreed to keep our secrets."

"I don't know _everything_," Charlie grumbled, the words minced by his molars as his hands rubbed his hips.

Old Quil turned to the man with a questioning cock of his head.

"What's all this crap hafta do with my daughter?" he ground out, his gaze snapping across the lawn and skewering Bella with impugning heat. He was also angry with her for not telling him, that was clear as crystal.

Jared's brow shot up. "He doesn't know about imprinting?" he asked Chief Ateara in disbelief.

"We have told him the stories of the past," Old Quil's lips hitched up on one side. "And he knows about my grandson, Sam, and yourself; all the true and _recognized _imprints." There was a derisive undertone to his words… aimed at Bella.

And it caught her off guard.

Jared bared his teeth with a low growl an a snarl ripped from the wolf beside her and it made her feel a little better. Old Quil might not think she counted, but they did. Embry had said it himself: "you're Pack."

Bella's eyes darted out grudgingly to her father's piercing stare. The Council had conveniently left the most contentious part of this whole mess for the Pack to deal with. The cowards.

Oh, but Charlie was deducing it all well enough… and he was most definitely _not_ happy. Bella swallowed as her gaze dropped like lead.

Suddenly, the grey wolf's head jerked up, glancing over his shoulder as a two distant howls burrowed into the twilight. Her poor battered heart lunged up her throat in another frantic bid for freedom. With a soft whine, Paul scrambled back and carefully out from under Bella's arm.

Instinctively, her face whipped up to Jared in confusion. His expression had gone stony and intense - but not worried… not exactly. He met her gaze with a subtle nod and then turned back to the Council who were all sitting at confused attention.

Jared's shoulders pulled back as he lifted his chin with palpable pride. "Our Alpha is here."

Jacob phased underwater, the cool currents pulling at his fur and then biting into fresh tender skin. The pain felt wonderful. It grounded him in a human form that, truthfully, he hadn't been sure he had the strength to return to. There was such searing rage coursing through his veins.

He was furious. At many, many things.

Bella's life was in danger, the leech had said. The motherfucker would only say that it had to do with this rogue parasite and nothing more. That he'd have to meet with them to learn more because they had their precious reputations to repair.

Jacob could have forced the issue - and every fiber of his being was rebelling at the fact that he hadn't - but he also knew he would need the acumen and insight of a clear head to process whatever other mind-fuck revelations were thrown his way and his human brain was already running on fumes.

Fumes of rage.

All parts of him needed one thing right now, and one thing only: Bella. In his arms.

Right this fucking minute.

He rubbed his hands over his aching chest as he dove down deeper into the icy pool fed by a mountain stream. He was losing his mind. Literally. His body was burning with an omnipresent craving to … to _take his mate_.

It was disgusting, really. He seemed to only have two channels at the moment : one was blistering rage that was indiscriminately focused on gutting anything and everything around him.

The other was nothing but pure, prurient lust.

The second he'd phased after the meeting with the Cullens, the thirst for violence had metastasized into desire. Lurid images burned through his brain of tearing satin shorts from her skin like tissue paper, ripping through his zipper with the peal of metal teeth and plunging home into her welcoming heat and longing sighs. He'd had a taste of her this morning and she'd felt so fucking good in his arms.

His wolf wanted more.

So did Jacob.

He burst up from the water and sucked in a heaving breath of oxygen, growling as he pushed his hands through his wet hair. Even the frigid water did nothing to temper his body's magnificent reaction to the briefest flash of that fantasy.

This was getting so much worse.

_Fuck. The stakes were too high for this shit._

He forced his body into submission, flexing and relaxed each muscle of his human form as he acclimated to his bipedal frame. Wiping the water out of his face with a brusque palm, he waded toward the bank. It was one of the regular pools that they used to wash the filth from their lupine bodies after a patrol or a fight and luckily they kept an assortment of shorts stashed in one of the rotting trees nearby. He really should make a detour and get a better pair from his house (and a shirt) - but he wasn't going to waste another second.

He simply didn't have it in him.

His wolf was going ballistic - he was surprised as all hell that he'd had the strength to beat him down enough to phase. He'd seen this same frantic need in his other imprinted wolves: the need to connect with their imprint - to scent that she was safe, even though he could see so clearly through Paul's phased eyes.

It was only the knowledge that if he barreled into that meeting on four paws that it would make things with Charlie worse. The man was afraid… and furious; it was written clearly on his face. Jacob had his work cut out for him without adding more fuel to the fire.

"_And he knows about my grandson, Sam, and yourself; all the true and _recognized _imprints."_

The words leached clearly through this link with Paul and siphoned renewed fury through his veins like acid. The subtle repudiation of his imprint made him double over as rage buckled through his body and he almost lost his form.

He gasped, slamming restraint down over the impulse to phase and simply tear out Old Quil's throat. All of the Council was afraid of them - that was easy enough to smell - but for Old Quil it was all about the inherent threat Jacob posed to his leadership. It was a position that had been won by age, not bloodline and he was desperate to keep it in his grasp. Billy _should_ have been leader of their tribe, but his father had died young and Old Quil stepped in. Now he clung to the position like a dying man, which he in effect was. Jacob often wondered how he and his grandson could be so different. Quil was easy-going, giving - a little simple perhaps, but kind.

Old Quil was an arrogant bastard out for Number One.

But their chief's disdain was one thing if it was aimed at _him_, but Bella? She'd already been raked over enough coals and had been so strong and brave in this thing. And Old Quil's self-preservative instincts should know better. He was the only one of them who'd seen the wolves first hand when he was a boy.

Jacob was going to jog his memory a little.

Straightening, a low rumbling growl vibrated his diaphragm as he felt his searing indignation crackle through the Pack like lightning. The steam escaped in the two howls that climbed the falling dusk by the wolves on patrol.

Tearing an anonymous pair of shorts from the tree, he stalked off toward the Clearwaters' house, seamlessly pulling them on without a break in his jerking stride.

He was at the edge of the bluffs in two brisk minutes that should have taken eight . Through the smells of forest and ocean, the scents up ahead hit him like a wrecking ball. For wolves, scent was such a powerful hair-trigger - sparking aggression, protection, and passion. It didn't surprise him one bit that the rich creamy florals of her scent, wrapped in the soothing cocoon of musky protective Pack, changed the way neurons physically fired in his brain.

They were waiting.

And so was she.

In an abrupt and eerily coordinated movement, the Pack standing beside Bella turned as one toward the back of the yard. She whipped around to see Jacob silently stride through the tree-line.

A shiver raced down her spine at the sight: dressed in only dark cut-offs with broad shoulders pulled back with pride, he strode in that powerful mercury gait through the twilight, his muscles rippling in concert down his chest with each step.

He was stunning.

And it was obvious he'd been born for this. She could now see that little seeds of his inheritance had been sprinkled throughout his youth but the innate charisma, physical confidence, and strength of character he'd always had, had blossomed into something magnificent in one short year. It was a transformation perhaps even more profound than the phase.

Now, striding across the lawn, his face somber and intense, he moved with complete ease under the ponderous weight of the stares of his entire tribal Council, her frowning agitated father, and the duty he bore to his waiting Pack. Jacob held himself with a poise and presence that was undeniably regal and quivered with controlled dominion.

Bella had seen the reverence and the fear he instilled in the faces of his Pack, but never had she truly seen him in such a context. There wasn't a trace of that boy of her youth in those unyielding eyes. This man was an irrefutable leader.

Their Alpha.

A heavy silence descended over the darkening yard - only the pounding roar of the ocean daring to breathe - as Jacob's onyx eyes swept over the Council behind her with hard appraising eyes. His lips lifted fractiously from his teeth.

Bella glanced over her shoulder at the man who was irrefutably the target of his ire: Chief Ateara. The old man's eyelids blinked rapidly with the effort of holding his stare, even though his disapproving frown tried to deny it.

Bella didn't know that much about tribal politics, but anyone could sense there was animosity here… _challenge_. She could guess that Jacob did represent a very real threat to Old Quil's position and, suddenly, that not so subtle dig earlier made a little more sense.

Her gaze was drawn to her periphery where Billy's dark eyes were focused intently on her. His chin lifted so minutely she wondered if she imagined it, but the reassuring wink he threw in rammed his point home.

She was up to bat, and Billy - at least - thought she was up for the job.

An audible growl behind her made her whip back around to Jacob's heating gaze. He flashed agitated teeth at the old man.

"Jake," she breathed.

His attention snapped to her like a steel trap.

All of the craziness around him evaporated into inconsequential as he got lost in those endless dark eyes that reached in and caressed his heart oh, so tenderly. In that instant, none of the rest of it mattered - she was safe and she was his and he'd never let anything come between them again.

In three preternaturally fast strides, he was standing before her, listening to the nervous hitch of her breath and counting each glorious beat of her heart. She smelled so fucking good - warm and sweet and _mine_.

Surprise glistened in those huge eyes as his hand slipped around to cup that delicate jaw.

And, heedless of Council, position, and Pack , Jacob slithered down to his knees and pressed his face into her neck.

"You're safe," he breathed as he relished the feel of her warm exposed skin against his. One arm wound around her waist and the other slithered up over her shoulder blades as he sucked in greedy lungfuls of that redemptive scent.

Bella rubbed her cheek against his (she was so tiny she was just a few inches taller) as a hand tenderly threaded through the hairs at the nape of his neck, sending chill bumps racing down his spine.

"I was so scared," she whispered. "I'm sorry I messed that up."

At the sound of her insecurity, Jacob's head found the strength to lift from riding the sublime swells of her breath. 0

"_I'm_ sorry, Bella," he murmured as he drank in that beautiful exhausted face. He needed to take better care of her.

Her eyelashes fluttered, valiantly batting back tears, as those raspberry lips curved in a bittersweet smile. He turned and gathered that silken mouth in a kiss that massaged the bitterness away, leaving nothing but sweetness to savor. She sighed into his mouth as her fingers unconsciously tugged at the hairs on his head, fervently whispering her own heart's deepest longing, that threatened to push him over the abyss into insanity. Gasping, he broke the kiss, licking the final honeyed drops from that tempting lower lip before he tore his mouth away. He rested his forehead against her jaw and took a steeling breath.

He'd carved out this island in a sea of duty and purposely made a flat, bold statement at the same time: she was his imprint, his mate… his unapologetic weakness _and_ his immutable strength. And she would always come first.

But now it was time for the consequences.

Jacob was ready.

His hands slipped up to those dainty bared shoulders as he smoothly unfolded to his feet. Leaning down, he pressed a final kiss to her hairline, inhaling a last greedy measure of the scent that was indelibly etched into his very soul. "We'll talk later, honey," he murmured over her damp curls.

And then with firm hands, he guided her out of the way with an appointing glance over his shoulder to his Second. Jared's eyes sparkled in contrast to his curt deferential nod as he stepped to Bella's side.

His Pack understood… and approved.

A cold austere mask hardened his features as Jacob turned back to face the Council, with his Pack and his mate poignantly standing behind him.

Expressions ranged from uncensored surprise to the habitually solemn. He pointedly avoided the far corner of the group and his father and Charlie Swan - he could hear her father's rasping breath and sprinting heart clear enough. He met Old Quil's gaze and grim frown head on as took several steps forward and folded his hands calmly before him.

"I understand you've told Charlie Swan everything, Chief Ateara," Jacob stated, allowing his voice to dive down to a resonant bass that simmered with displeasure. His eyes bored into the old man's as the corner of his lip ticked up reflexively from a canine. The censure was clear and bordering on unforgivably insubordinate.

Just the way he wanted it.

This time Old Quil's gaze melted under the heat and slithered off to the side under the pretenses of looking at the man who was huffing heavily beside Jacob's father.

"Not _everything_," Charlie veritably growled.

Jacob turned his head purposefully and met Charlie's infuriated eyes head-on. It was as bad as Jacob had suspected - his face was beet red and the vein in his forehead was pounding angrily. Billy had his hand on Charlie's forearm that looked like it was struggling against the impulse draw to his weapon.

Jacob nodded curtly, his face betraying nothing. "And he was wise to do so," his eyes flashed back with an insolent smirk aimed at their Chief. He just couldn't let it go that the man had let their innate conflict bleed into dealings with his imprint. He returned his gaze to Charlie and announced in a voice that was deep and sure and steady: "As both Alpha and man, it's _my_ duty to tell you that I imprinted on your daughter."

Charlie Swan choked on his tongue.

Bursting away from Billy, he turned his back on the group and slapped his palms over his face, obviously trying to pull together too many emotional reactions to count. He whipped back around and took a stomping step toward Jacob.

"What the hell's that _mean_?" he bellowed.

Oh, he knew exactly what it meant and he was livid.

Jacob told him anyway, drawing his focus to the less inflammatory aspects of the imprint. "It means I love her - that I'll always love her, Charlie," he soothed, softening his voice to a dusky croon. "You know I always have."

But Charlie had passed the point of appeasement several miles back. "Oh-ho-ho, Jake," he coughed a bitter laugh. "That's somethin' completely different than… than _this_!" He flicked his hand between Jake and his daughter.

Jacob drew in a cooling breath through his nose as the wolf reacted to his snide undertone and challenge. "My wolf chose her as my other half," he bit out, the words percolating with a growl. "She's my mate."

It probably wasn't the best choice of words, but he was struggling with a flailing instinct that _demanded_ he lay claim.

"Your WHAT?!" The word exploded from his lips as Charlie took another step forward.

Jacob drew his shoulders back as his nostrils flared with the effort of keeping his burgeoning temper in check.

"Charlie," Billy rolled forward and grabbed his arm. "Calm down, old friend," he murmured.

Charlie's wild gaze snapped down to the man's petitioning eyes.

"They always had somethin' real special, you know that," Billy murmured, offering him a familiar smile. "You remember, didn't we always joke about who was gonna foot the bill for their -…."

Charlie yanked his arm out of Billy's grasp. "Their _wedding_?!" He completed his sentence with derision. "Those were nothin' but an old man's daydreams, you old fool. She's _seventeen_!"

"Eighteen next week," Bella's voice piped up, brave and clear. Its feminine liquid tones injected quenching sanity to the heat. "Dad, please try to underst-…"

But apparently not for Charlie. "You hush!" he whipped around on his daughter with a scowl.

Indignant fury ignited in Jacob's chest and he took a step toward the man who'd dared to speak in such a tone to his imprint - father or not.

Charlie spun back around, pointedly skewering every last pair of eyes on the way on his wrath like a kabob. "You've got **daughters**, you bastard!" he hissed at his friend - obviously using that entryway as the focus for his shrapnel.

Billy frowned up at him with a curt nod. "And you know I lost Becca because I was fool enough to dig my heels in 'bout the boy she chose. Now I got a granbaby an' another on the way that I can't afford to see an' that she ain't so keen on bringin' home," he murmured low and caustic. "You gonna make the same mistake?"

The pain in his voice was sobering - even at such a time like this. And suddenly Jacob saw just how hard his father was trying not to make the same mistakes with him as he had with the twins… as well as how hard Jacob had been making it for him. On a Council that was blinded by fear and uncertainty - or simply power-hungry greed - his father _wasn't_ the enemy… he was his only friend.

Charlie, however, was not similarly moved. "No, I'm **not**," he spat as he spun around on Jake with an accusatory finger drawn and pointed.

"Now look," he took a threatening step toward him, his eyes flashing. "I ain't stupid. I know things could get real ugly if this whole thing gets out," he flicked his eyes out toward Jacob's Pack as he continued his stomping advance .

The potent scent of testosterone was ramping his wolf up with each step - Jacob fought tooth and nail to collar it.

"And as a man of the law, I can appreciate what you all are tryin' to do," he continued, stepping down from the carport as he punched each word out of his gut. "So I'll look the other way s'long as you keep it on your lands," the threat behind the words was coiling around Jacob's chest, constricting his rising temper into a pressurized bomb.

Charlie Swan stopped not a foot from him and fearlessly jammed a finger into Jacob's chest where the muscles were twitching and slithering under his skin.

His threatening gaze lanced into Jacob's burning eyes. "_But you leave my girl out of it_," his hissed.

Jacob batted his hand away with a crack, feeling like he was swallowing down a knot of magma. His gaze paced between Charlie's bloodshot and seething eyes.

Fear…_terror_ was fueling that fire… he could scent it.

It just riled his wolf all the more.

He didn't know he had it in him, but with a Herculean effort he forced intelligible human words over his lips in a low rumble. "It's Bella's choice."

"Stay away from daughter," he spat hatefully.

Jacob's lips flashed up from his teeth as he took a brisk step back - Charlie was too close, and Jacob was too close to losing it. "It's her choice," he repeated, the words disintegrating into a growl.

Charlie minced his next words through gritted teeth as he fisted his hands at his side, "Not if she's 3,000 miles away, it ain't."

_He was threatening to take her away?_

"She's **MINE**!" The edict exploded over his lips in an imperious bellow.

With no warning, Charlie lunged forward and threw his fist into Jacob's face.

Instinctively, the man in him absorbed the force by turning his cheek so the hand didn't shatter. But he wasn't prepared for his wolf's reaction.

Blistering rage detonated in his gut as Jacob's head snapped back around with a bloodcurdling snarl. His face palpably elongated as his bones and muscles pushed into the phase. Showing such weakness - no matter how benevolent - in front of his Pack, the Counsel… his _mate_? It was simply unacceptable.

Embry was behind Charlie in an instant, pulling him away, while Sam slipped between them as a shield. Snarling, Jacob struggled to yank the wolf back into his human form. His skeleton viscerally snapped into place, throwing him a back a step with the force.

His eyeballs were searing the sockets of his skull as he glared at Sam's bowed head, his throat bared in a desperate plea for lupine appeasement.

"_If he don't stay away from my girl, I __**swear**__!_"

But Charlie still hadn't shut the fuck up, he was spluttering and yelling at Embry's restraint. The Council had _finally_ reacted to _something_, and all able bodied members had lunged to their feet, stumbling over chairs to get back with the clanging of metal.

Jacob's body was vibrating like a jackhammer. He needed to get the hell out of there for _everyone's_ safety, but every fiber of his being was screaming not to back down.

"Let me **GO**, Jared! !" Bella's shriek sliced through the jumbled mayhem like a hot knife.

Jacob's eyes snapped to where his Second had his arms wrapped protectively around her waist while she frantically scrabbled toward him. A snarl ripped from Jacob's chest that sprayed foam with its vehemence.

Jared's eyes widened and his hands dropped to his side and Bella fearlessly threw herself toward him.

"Jake," she gasped, throwing her arms around his hulking body with abandon. Shit, she could barely get her arms around his ribcage, but that _touch_.

It instantly soothed his blistering rage like a blessed healing balm. Jacob's shaking arms slowly wrapped around her as he tipped his face up and gulped in breath after breath of the dusk. She pressed her cheek over his heart and sighed, melting in his arms like she belonged there - both of them held sweet hostage by that narcotic hum that was their bond. It was getting so much worse: their souls were now craving union with a two-fisted demand.

He didn't know how much more of this he could take.

But there was still a psychotic leech, an ominous meeting with a fucking Cullen coven …and now her father teetering on the edge of a nervous breakdown.

"Embry, I swear to God! _Get the __**fuck**__ off!"_

Bella's head jerked around in surprise.

It was the first time Jacob had ever heard the man swear like that, but it barely registered. All he was concerned with at the moment was Bella turning away from him. A low warning growl rumbled in his chest as his eyes snapped a glare in the direction of the man who was still being cannily screened by his Pack.

"Jake… Jake," Bella's soft petition heralded her small cool hands slipping up to his clenched jaw. "Jacob," she begged.

Her lips curved in a relieved smile when he finally tore his eyes away from the one man he still hadn't been able to dominate.

"Hey," she whispered, stroking her fingers over his cheek with such redemptive tenderness that the fires sputtered. "It's his turn to fall apart, huh?" she grinned, making a lame attempt at humor.

"_Isabella Swan!"_

Sucking in a breath, she craned over her shoulder while hands continued their soothing caress. "Dad, **go to the car**," she commanded with surprising strength. "Embry, Sam, help him?"

"I'm not leaving-.."

"I'll be there in a second," she interrupted, making Jacob stiffen reflexively. "Shhh," she crooned, turning back and capturing his eyes.

"C'mon, Chief," Paul's human bass swept up the chaos in his palpable dominance. "She's goin' home with you if you don't fuck this up."

Jacob glanced over her head at Sam and Paul leading the man away while Embry pushed his dad along behind them. Charlie's face was locked over his shoulder, his eyes shooting daggers, but luckily his gun was still holstered and that had to be a good sign.

"Let's go inside and finish this meeting," Sue Clearwater spoke up firmly to Chief Ateara, as she guided him toward the house, followed by the rest of the visibly shaken Council. Jacob couldn't be sure, but Sue just might be a welcomed addition to the group. He glared after Old Quil and the others.

"Jake?" Bella's voice was a magnet that drew his eyes before it had even registered in the hollow of his ear. "Dad needs some time," she whispered, smoothing her palms over his cheek. Lovingly.

"I can't wait," he choked, the words jumping the rails of sanity as his arms tightened their embrace.

"We have to," she breathed.

Jacob shook his head as he bent down to capture those lips and melt those traitor words. He swallowed them down as he covetously devoured her mouth with long hungry strokes. She melted instantly against him, surrendering honeyed mouth and velvet tongue freely to his demand.

Jacob's hands roamed possessively, each inch of skin alternately soothing and exciting his wolf. Up and down that slender waist, counting her vertebrae with fingertips and cherishing the swell of her hips. One hand slipped over the sumptuous silk of her shoulders to the nape of her neck and his thumb rode the lush movements of her jaw as she tempted him back to sanity with her kisses.

But finally, those delicate hands slipped to his jaw and pried her lips way, with a regretful moist smack. There she stayed, hanging in the balance of their heaving breaths and pounding hearts, an aural tapestry of the need that was slowly knitting them inexorably together.

"I'm yours," she murmured finally, in a voice sloughed down to the dusky quick by passion. "You're mine, right?"

Jacob's eyes popped open, instantly drowning in those yawning pupils that effortlessly swallowed him whole.

"Yes." It was a an oath and an edict.

"We _have_ to wait," she breathed, going back down on her heels from her tiptoes, the soft giving swell of breasts dragging down his chest. Jacob's eyes fluttered closed as he sucked a breath through his teeth. She felt so fucking incredibly _good_.

"He needs time - just a little," she ventured apologetically and his eyes blinked open to that gorgeous upturned face. "It's all just been… a lot, y'know?"

His eyes snapped sharply into focus - he didn't know if she realized it, but she was also speaking for herself; he could hear it in her tone. _She_ needed time.

And that was another story altogether.

It solidified all the little fractured pieces back into a sane and steely resolve. Jacob nodded once.

"Jake, you gotta trust me," she whispered.

He swallowed thickly as his eyes washed over her face.

"I mean, I know I messed stuff up this afternoon -…"

"No you didn't," he interrupted brusquely.

Bella blinked. "Well you gotta trust me with Dad," she continued, obviously not wanting to broach the subject of this afternoon.

And that was fine by Jacob, things were complicated enough.

"He doesn't wanna lose me, he just needs to calm down a little," she murmured.

Jacob rolled his lips as his eyes paced between hers. His wolf wasn't having it, but both man and Alpha knew that trying to control the wrong things ended up in disaster. His Pack worked best when they were given reign with their unique skills. And Bella's insight with people had _always_ been a definitive strength.

He nodded. "I trust you."

"Did things go okay this afternoon?" she asked hesitantly.

"I have a meeting with the Cullens in another half an hour," he admitted crisply.

Bella's brow furrowed as she cocked her head curiously. It was adorable and sexy at the same time.

A smile hitched up the side of his mouth as he leaned down and kissed her forehead. His hands relaxed their grip, compromising by slipping down to rest possessively on her hips. "It's just some bullshit stuff."

"I thought they were going to leave?" she frowned.

And just that little touch of indignation in that voice made the whole meeting seem a whole lot better - even though it technically wasn't.

"They have some news about that psycho I gotta hear," he growled, feeling guilty for his lie by omission, but he wanted to hear what they had to say before he got everyone riled up about it. Those leeches were drama queens to the core.

"But hey," he paused, lifting a hand to tuck her hair behind an ear. "Stay with your dad, 'kay? I'm gonna send a wolf to your house." He tried to keep the worry out of his voice.

Bella's knitted brow showed him he only marginally succeeded. But she gifted him with an unquestioning acceptance and a nod. "But you'll be by later?"

Jacob's brow shot up. "Tonight?"

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth as her eyes darted insecurely to the side. "Um, yeah?"

A gratified smile hitched up his lips as he leaned down to dissolve that dusting of insecurity with a kiss. She hummed against his mouth and her ardor pounced out to nip at his lower lip. Jacob growled low with pleasure.

"Sorry," she blushed, a chagrinned thumb slipping up to rub over his lip.

Jacob grinned with a slow shake of his head. "Tonight?"

That rosy stain to her cheeks darkened further. "Yeah," she whispered looking up at him with eyes that sparkled with affection… and anticipation. But they also looked worn down to the bone.

The realization of just how much stress they'd both been under slapped him in the face and he quickly backtracked. "I mean, even if we only sleep -…"

Her index finger tapped over his mouth. "I can't wait either," she whispered, a sexy half smile playing at the corner of those mismatched lips. "I mean, really it's getting ridiculous," she snorted with a roll to her eyes as her hand fell to absently rub over her heart.

Jacob smiled and covered her hand tenderly with his own huge palm. "Yeah, it is."

A siren exploded in the not-so-distance and Bella jumped a foot in his arms.

"Shh, honey," Jacob chuckled, pulling her cheek to his chest as the offending noise cut as abruptly as it had started.

"God, that's so freaking irritating!" Bella spat, pulling back and throwing a scowl over her shoulder.

"What happened to 'he's been through a lot today,'" he reminded her with a saccharine smile.

Bella slapped his pec and, with lightning reflexes, he snatched her hand in his and brought it to his lips repentantly.

"Tonight?" he whispered over her fingertips.

Bella nodded timidly, her lips valiantly trying to smother her satisfied smile.

Jacob decided to help the cause by leaning down for another taste of temptation. Petal lips blossomed under his mouth and he groaned deep in his throat.

"Charlie's about a second away from pulling that gun," Paul's snigger turned his purr into a growl.

Bella's lips ripped away from his, turning to the sound of the intruder as color rushed again to her cheeks.

Jacob's gaze darted across the lawn to where his Pack mate was leaning against the house with a cheeky smirk. Flashing his canines petulantly, Jacob straightened as Bella turned out of his embrace.

"S'about fucking time, Swan," Paul threw in an insolent wink and spun around on his heel before his Alpha could react. But oddly, the wolf was preening at the taunt, and Jacob realized it was because it was validating… accepting. Paul had made a point earlier to shoot glimpses of the afternoon through his memories when he was Phased.

So Jacob could see just how much his Pack cared… for him _and_ his mate.

The fucker could really be alright sometimes.

"You gonna be okay, honey?" he murmured, wrapping his hand around Bella's waist as he pressed his lips to the crown of her head. He just couldn't stop touching her.

She nodded distractedly, her eyes glued to the front of the yard where blue lights were silently flashing in the dusk. "I think he'll calm down … eventually," she rolled her eyes on their way up to his as they walked toward the screening house.

But he could feel the tension in her spine and in her step. There really was no help for it - both of them had contentious meetings looming before them. But also the sweetest recompense promised after. Finally there was a finish line in sight.

Or more like a long awaited beginning.

As they rounded the corner of the house and into the sight of her father's cruiser, Bella stepped away from his side, her beautiful face tipping up to his apologetically. But he could see his same thoughts mirrored in her eyes as she pulled his hand up in both of hers between them.

"Love you," she whispered, pressing her lips to his fingers sweetly and holding them there like a talisman. Her eyelids fluttered closed as she drew in a steeling breath.

"Love you more," he breathed, bringing up his other hand to brush his knuckles over her cheek with nothing short of wonder.

Her eyes snapped open and narrowed in disapproval. "Dork," she smirked.

Jacob's lips curved as she released his hand and took a step backward. "See you later," she murmured and then turned toward where his Pack and his father were gathered around the police cruiser. Jacob was surprised the windshield wasn't melting with the glare that was being cast his way by the man sitting stiffly in the driver's seat.

Squaring his jaw, he crossed his arms across his chest. A low growl rumbled in his gut as he forced himself to lean against the corner of the house while he returned Charlie's stare with glittering eyes.

"Stop it, dad," Bella sighed as she slipped into the passenger's seat of the police cruiser, even as her eyes sought Jacob, shrouded in twilight and now standing tense and erect beside the house. Her hand flew up to her rebelling heart. It physically _hurt_ to leave him.

Charlie barely waited until the door was closed before he was peeling out in reverse with the clanging throw of gravel.

Her gaze clung to Jacob as her father spun the car around, and she saw his hand slip up to eerily mirror her same movements over his chest.

He felt it too.

Catching herself against the door, Bella released a heavy sigh as she pulled her seatbelt across her chest.

"I'm sending you to your mom's," Charlie ground out low as he turned out on the darkening road.

"No, you're not," Bella bit back, glaring at him across the front seat. His mustache was buckled with his frown.

His nose wrinkled with a livid scowl as he rearranged his fists on the wheel. "This is _NOT_ gonna happen, Bells," he spat, cutting sharp eyes over to her and then returning them to the road.

Bella closed her eyes as she hit her head back against the headrest. "Can we not talk about this right now?"

"We _ARE_ talking about this," he came back hotly.

"Okay," she soothed, turning her cheek toward where he was burning up the road with speed and his glare. "Just not right now. I'm tired and…" she pressed her lips together as she turned toward the passenger window. "And it's been a long day."

Charlie glanced over at her several times and ground his foot into the pedal as the cruiser growled - with his lights still flashing - down the back roads. For miles there was nothing but the sound of an engine and the silence of two people - all three pushed to their breaking points.

The Rez border was like some kind tipping point.

With a flick of his wrist, Charlie turned off the lights as he resituated himself on the seat. "Look, Bells, I uh-…" he began in some semblance of his usual voice. "I'm _real_ worried."

Bella turned back to face him. "I know, dad," she whispered. "It's just…." she pulled a corner of her lip into her mouth. "Let's just go home? We can get dinner and talk."

She hadn't eaten all day and she knew her father always did better on a full stomach. The familiarity of home and food was her only arsenal against what would indubitably be an explosive conversation.

Because she'd already chosen.

Now she had to somehow convince her dad that it was the right choice. The problem was how could she explain something that was so rooted in her soul and - even though it had been steadily germinating all her life - had exploded into full bloom in a preternatural week? Over the last 30 minutes and almost as many miles she had been trying to figure that out.

She was still coming up empty. Inside, it all made perfect sense but words were notoriously feeble at describing perfection.

"I gotta swing by the station," her father huffed out irritably.

Bella blinked out of her own thoughts as she turned more toward her father. "Why?" she burst out.

Her father glanced over at her as his mustache tilted with his frown. "Well, I gotta police report to write about an incident at the hospital today," he bit out, twisting the words with resentment. "Gotta message from the precinct and a text from a Dr. Carlisle Cullen."

Bella pressed her lips together and sat up a bit more.

"Seems that quarterback son of his, Emmett, has a _history of seizures_," he snorted caustically. "There was damage to some equipment this afternoon when they brought him in for a grand mal."

Bella swallowed thickly as images from the day flashed through her mind: Edward's frantic pleas, the Doctor's covert threats… the way they'd controlled the people around them. Bella was so freaking glad that ju-ju crap didn't work on her and her father.

"Can't you wait 'til tomorrow," she rasped. She really didn't have the bandwidth to deal with this particular drama at the moment; her plate was already spilling over.

"Not if I don't want it to look any fishier than it already does," he grumbled.

Bella's head collapsed back on the seat with an irritated sigh.

Her father returned his eyes to the road, but one hand reached over the seat to pat her thigh. It was the first positive sign she'd had from him to date, and right then and there, Bella decided to just go with whatever he needed to do to feel in control and carve out time for the rest of it later.

"It won't be long," he murmured, returning his hand to the wheel. "You can run across the street to the diner and pick us up a pair of burgers."

"And some coffee," Bella sniffed, turning to look out the windshield as the lights from the county road paced by in the falling darkness.

"Yeah," Charlie chuckled. "That'd be real good."

Bella pulled her knees up to her chest and the skirt down over them as she tried to adjust to the change of plans. But one thing bothered her: Jake had been worried about _something_. She hadn't pushed him because, like her, he'd already been pushed way past his breaking point. But truthfully she also she kind of didn't want to know. Not right now.

But whatever it was, he was worried enough to send a wolf to protect her house this evening and she wasn't going to be home… not yet.

There was a little prickling feeling at the back of her neck; something was significant about that fact that she didn't really understand.

"Hey, did they find my phone?" Bella asked suddenly.

"Yeah it's down at the station," Charlie wheezed, obviously replaying the stressful incident that had put it there.

"Good," Bella nodded.

"Yeah," Charlie agreed. "Bells, I don't want you _two inches_ away from that thing from here on out… got that?" He turned to her with a convicting frown. "We'll get you a better one this weekend, kay? One with _GPS_," he growled as he returned his eyes to the road.

"Yeah, dad," Bella breathed, biting her lip.

And that's how she found herself feverishly dialing Jacob's number on her crappy flip phone before she'd even left the precinct's building. She told herself it was to be responsible and let him know that her plans had changed, but Bella wasn't going to lie. She wanted to hear his voice.

Seconds later, she got her wish, but not the way she'd wanted it.

"You got Jake. Leave a message." It was the same voicemail greeting he'd had for over a year; an eerily preserved moment in time in the higher baritone of his former self. She remembered how stupid he'd felt when she helped him record it that day and the utilitarian words still bounced with levity in that old sunny smile.

Bella sighed sadly and pressed end. He was probably in that meeting.

With _vampires. _So much had changed in a year.

Blowing a breath from her cheeks, she pushed her shoulder into the station's front doors while her fingers tapped out a text letting him know she'd be in town before she headed home.

Returning her phone to her backpack - which had also found its way to the station - she slung it over her shoulder and jogged down the steps and headed for the diner. Charlie nearly lived there - it was down the block and across the street and was literally as familiar as his own kitchen table.

She was looking forward to cooking for him this year. _Both_ of them.

There was only a lone car trundling into the distance as she ran across the street - Forks shut down at five, especially on a Friday night. She wandered down the empty sidewalk as her mind spun through all rubble and ruin of the day. But even with all the craziness and sleep deprivation, she felt strangely invigorated. There was a finish line… finally.

Tonight she'd be in Jacob's arms. (And her father was going to sleep well.)

Bella blushed at the thought. It was both a titillating and intimidating step, but one that she found herself undeniably ready to take.

As long as it was with Jacob.

She wondered if she'd have felt differently about the imprint if he wasn't already her best friend. But - even though it went against any logical thought - this supernatural quickening of their romance and relationship felt completely natural.

As easy as breathing. Now that they'd stopped fighting it.

With those thoughts warming her body and loosening the omnipresent knot in her stomach, Bella pushed into the café. The little bell tinkled through the sounds of lazy country music and murmured conversation. The diner was peppered with several truckers and workers grabbing a bite on their way to Somewhere Else, but Friday night siphoned most of their regular clientele off to bars and the pool hall by the cliffs.

"Hey Bella," Madge called from behind the counter.

Bella lifted a hand in greeting as she wove around the mostly empty tables. She set her bag on one of the chrome and vinyl stools at the old diner's counter and leaned her elbows on the worn laminate as she panned the front of the room. Only a laborer with dirty blond hair sat, hunched over a menu, sat at the other end of the counter.

Bella turned back and smiled at the older woman. "Can I get two burgers to go?"

"One veggie and one regular?" Madge lifted a knowing brow.

Bella nodded with a grin as she scooted onto the stool next to her bag. "Oh, and two large coffees," she added quickly.

The woman threw a rag over her shoulder. "Long day?" she winked.

"Uh huh," Bella groaned theatrically. And a long night ahead of her as well.

"Sure thing, sugar," she pushed the croon through a sympathetic pucker of her lips and leaned behind her to yell the order in a contrasting screech to Jerry in the back.

Bella released a long slow sigh into the welcomed quirky familiarity as the woman busied herself behind the counter, humming tunelessly to the twangy music floating from the beat up speakers in the corner. Feeling eyes on her, she glanced down the long counter to find the blond watching her out of the corner of his eye over the menu. The corner of his mouth curved in acknowledgment.

Bella forced a polite smile and returned her gaze up ahead to where Madge was just setting down two to-go cups of coffee. The man seemed a little creepy, but it was probably because her nerves were totally shot. She felt like she was looking for monsters everywhere now.

Chuckling at herself, she pulled the plastic lid off one of the cups - grimacing at the bitter smell of coffee that had probably passed its prime several hours ago - and grabbed the canister of sugar from the metal basket that was permanently affixed to the counter. She tipped out a long unapologetic stream of white crystals. Leaning forward, she returned it to its holder, and then sat back.

And froze, sucking in a breath through her teeth.

The man was sitting right beside her.

_How-…?_

Cold dread bloomed in her stomach, leaching ice through her veins while her mind frantically tried to piece together some logical, reasonable explanation. He was sitting at the other end of the counter - 15 feet away - just a second ago.

Her fingernails dug into the heels of her hands as she slowly pulled her arms back across the counter while her frightened eyes ached as they ran over his features in her periphery without turning her head, desperately searching for some sort of clue. Chin tucked, he was sitting in the same position with a peeling menu propped up on the counter between his two hands. He wore a worn jeans jacket and his long blond hair was pulled back in a greasy ponytail, shorter strands curling around behind his ear.

Bella didn't so much as breathe.

The man shifted on his stool in a movement that suddenly made the utter stillness of his posture just that much more apparent.

"I was trying to decide what to order while I was waiting," he suddenly murmured in a flat breathy voice that was utterly devoid of any inflection whatsoever.

Bella swallowed thickly as she tried to inch away.

His chin lifted as his eyes darted up from under that sallow brow and flitted around the room. "But everything looks so good." An empty chuckle bounced in his chest with a strange clicking sound like the tick of a second hand. "Then finally you came along," he breathed, turning his head to face her.

A reflexive breath inflated her lungs as she jerked back.

_His eyes._

Black, hollow… dead. The emptiness was ringed with blood red set in jaundiced whites.

He tipped his head to the side like an insect as his lips curved into an icy parody of smile.

The click of a carafe of cream being set on the counter made Bella jump, biting her lip with a hitching whimper. But she was simply unable to look away.

" 'You know what you want?" Madge asked in the flat tones used for customers she didn't know.

The vampire's callous gaze swept out to the woman and Bella wanted to scream at her to run. She glanced out at the waitress whose face had suddenly lost its bland smirk for a fish-eyed stare.

And suddenly Bella understood; she was alone in a room full people.

"Yeah," he laughed, the word nothing more than the rasp of air against throat. He turned slowly back to Bella, devouring her with those heartless eyes while thin lips hitched up in a relishing smile.

"I'll have the special."

'

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_'_

_Review if you like._


	13. Failure

_Note: Some disturbing innuendos going on (just a warning) and some kitchy lines (that are meant to be there - a little tongue-in-cheek subtext). Alice's visions manifest more in the traditional "soothsayer" way, but the vamps in this story are incidental characters so I only give you as much vague info as Jake and Bella have._

_Love ya, Tayjayfan._

'

_Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy._

'

* * *

**Chapter 13 - Failure**

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'

A growl scurried up Jacob's throat along with bile and leached into the falling night. Across the darkened meadow he could see them coming. Gliding like legless specters, the Cullen clan approached, their skin glowing white and ghastly in the diffuse moonlight filtering through the clouds to his preternatural eyes.

_He hated them._

Arrogant and entitled, they strode into a meeting with their mortal enemies like they were a monarchy arriving at their coronation parade. But he'd have to put aside his own bitterness and resentment - at least for this night - because in the wake of ebbing adrenaline and rage, Jacob was forced to admit that he needed all the help he could get.

Divvying up his Pack for duties had made their own weakness crystal clear: Leah and Seth were still a day away from being conscious and even then would come with baggage that would steepen their learning curve. Finally Sam was returning to some semblance of sanity but Jacob also knew that pushing him too far too fast could push him back over the edge. Brady's body was healing, but the trauma had left its scars and in the end he and Collin were just boys who would take several months of curing in the fires of duty before they were hardened into men.

That left four seasoned wolves who each had their own strengths and shortcomings…. and Jacob. When he was spearheading their initiatives from the trenches, that was more than enough, but he wouldn't be so foolishly prideful to ignore the fact he was currently a man divided.

As Alpha he had to be unapologetically mercenary in using his resources and, unfortunately, that meant he also had to be willing to consider such an unholy alliance if - _and only if_ - it somehow benefitted his Pack.

And kept Bella safe.

Even as the knot of leeches slithered their way across the meadow, Jacob was furtively watching the images playing in his mind's eye. Quil was running the outer boundaries with Collin while Sam and Brady took the inner ring and the seashore.

And Embry was almost to Bella's house.

An anticipant whine leaked from Paul's muzzle as he shifted on his haunches behind him and Jacob's eyes darted down to reprimand him with a warning glare. He'd brought Jared and Paul to the meeting in their wolf forms - if things took a turn for the worse, the three of them would certainly be able to take these fucking parasites down. Because of their diet, they weren't as fast or as strong as the others.

And, luckily, their scent wasn't as inflammatory either. Otherwise - strategic necessity or not - he simply wouldn't have been able to rein in the burning imperative to kill. Like a rotting summer trashcan sprayed with bleach, that sickening miasma billowed along ahead of them on the evening breeze made his stomach turn and his blood boil.

Jacob sucked a breath through his teeth in an effort to spare his nose as the two wolves behind him reared up from their haunches with low growls. That murderous mandate was even harder to ignore in their animal forms.

"Easy," Jacob murmured out of the side of his mouth even as his own muscles twitched and slithered as the leeches grew near.

Carlisle Cullen stopped just over the "line" that ran down the middle of this clearing in the mountains bordering on their lands - the very place where, a century ago, Jacob's great grandfather had made this contentious treaty for reasons he still didn't understand.

The other leeches of his clan fell into a neat configuration like bowling pins behind him. _Almost_ all the others, that is - one was missing and it was exactly the one Jacob had been salivating to get eyes on.

"We thank you, Jacob," the doctor began with his annoying-as-shit paternalism. "For extending the magnanimous hand of your- "

"Oh, shut the fuck up," Jacob cut off his usual lame decorum with a snarl. "You're already runnin' on borrowed time so don't waste your breath."

Carlisle folded his hands before him as he painted an urbane smile over his annoyance.

"Where's the other one," Jacob demanded.

The curve of the leech's lips faltered imperceptibly. "We thought this meeting might be more productive if Edward excused himself," he crooned.

There was a silky hypnotic undertone to the words that Jacob recognized as being remnants of thrall - meaning there was a point in that statement he would have forced if he'd had the chance.

And Jacob didn't like it.

Not a twitch of his muscles betrayed that fact as he stared him down with hard stoic eyes and tried to decide whether to call him on it. All while he furiously panned through his wolves' points of view; Embry was just coming up on Bella's house.

Jacob went with drawing him out further.

"So just get to the fucking point, _Carl_," Jacob bit out, twisting the cheeky nickname with the same condescension that the doctor used on him. His bitterness ran deep and when the enemy was riled, it revealed the cracks in its armor.

Carlisle's jaw clenched subtly. "Where would you like me to begin?" he hissed with a saccharine smile that flashed razor teeth.

Jacob took a step forward as his nose wrinkled with the covert challenge. "How 'bout with the part where **I need **_**you**_** to save Bella's life**!" he bellowed as his hands balled into fists at his side.

At Jacob's overt aggression, the one they called Jasper took as step forward and the doctor's hand snapped out to stay him with an arm across his chest. Jacob turned to those burning eyes and lifted his lips from his canines - he was the only one of them that posed anything close to a challenge, any fool could see that.

A rumbling growl vibrated in the soles of his feet from the two wolves behind him - it wasn't just the leeches he was riling and that was a line that needed to be toed carefully.

Both hands flattened out behind him in a placating gesture. He hadn't told Paul and Jared why they were meeting, so he could see this interchange through a fresh set of eyes. And that particular pair of perspectives running through his head right now were blistering with protective rage.

"Let's bring this down a notch, shall we?" Carlisle appeased, pushing the blond behind him and holding out a conciliatory palm. But it was exactly what Jacob had wanted; he was backing down and some of that haughty veneer was starting to peel back from the self-preservative quick. "As I've mentioned we have a clairvoyant among us… her name is Alice."

The small black-haired female standing behind Jasper was pulled into his side protectively while she beamed blithely across the dividing line. She gave Jacob the creeps with that vacant smile.

"Her visions are sometimes difficult to interpret, but Bella has figured prominently in one of them," Carlisle continued with pointed ambiguity.

But Jacob was now distracted by an entirely different matter altogether - _Bella wasn't home_. But Embry had taken the back way to beat her there and here is where experience came to play: instead of waiting, he started sprinting along the road they'd be taking up from the Rez.

Shifting on his feet he snapped his mind back to critical conversation at hand. "What has she seen?" he challenged, glaring at the little hobgoblin.

The woman seemed completely immune to Jacob's scorn. "Well, you dogs gum up my vision," she complained as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Jacob frowned.

"Similar to thrall, her gifts do not work with your kind," Carlisle explained with an indulgent smile, as if to a child. "But, unfortunately, every time she looks into Bella's future now, she sees her becoming," he paused, glancing uncomfortably at Alice. "Becoming …_one of us_."

Jacob sucked in an inadvertent breath. A bathtub of liquid nitrogen might just as well been dumped over his head - his body went numb as his spine stiffened.

"What?" he rasped - the brittle horror shattered over his lips.

"It's James, he's the problem I think," Alice piped with a theatrical scowl that was completely oblivious to Jacob's reaction.

"James?" Jacob quickly grabbed the tail of any coherence whatsoever.

"He's the nomad who's been harassin' your puppies," Jasper drawled.

"You **know** him! ?" the words exploded in indignation over his lips.

"Now I didn't say anything a' the sort," Jasper smirked, drawing a growl from Jacob's innards.

Carlisle stepped forward briskly. "We know _of_ him, Jacob," he soothed. "Nothing more. He's no friend of ours. And we know two weeks ago you killed his mate, Victoria, and he's seeking revenge."

Jacob glanced down at where Paul was paying rapt attention on his tense haunches. The wolf glanced up at his Alpha with glittering yellow eyes; they'd been right about that monster's psychotic drive.

"He bites her just to turn her," Alice's voice suddenly rose up, those grating bright tones softening to dreamy as her eyes seemed to glaze. "On the wrist…somewhere… in a dark cavernous building…"

Jacob's eyes narrowed sharply. "When!" he demanded.

Blinking, she met his gaze with a shake of her head. "It doesn't work like that," she frowned. "But it's not time yet."

"All her visions come when they wanna and seem ta happen around flashpoints a' feelin's," Jasper drawled behind her, placing his hands on her shoulders as Jacob glared. "But the when and where of it all ain't always clear."

Jacob shoved his hands through his hair as he paced several steps along the line. Embry still hadn't met the cruiser on its way home and that wasn't right. He whipped around on Jared with a low growl.

"Go," he hissed. " Help Emb."

Immediately the animal lunged to its feet and turned tail with a barking snarl. Jacob spun back around on the leeches.

"Why do you even fucking care!" he snapped. There was something missing from this equation - these monsters never did anything without a vested self-interest, no matter how benevolent they pretended to be.

"Jacob, all human life is precious to us," Carlisle professed, the words, slick and serpentine, slithering up his spine and making him shudder. "Like you, we were forced into this life and we hardly wish such a fate on another."

Jacob cocked his head as his eyes ran cannily over the demon's bland expression. That statement just contradicted itself. What he'd left out was it was these very leeches who forced the wolves into their fate. Their _altruism_ must be pretty fucking selective.

"What's the _real_ reason, huh Carl?" he sniffed a dismissive laugh. "Why'd you come back?"

"Why do put up with this mutt, Carlisle?" the blond female spat contentiously as her hands crossed over her chest.

"_Rosalie_," Carlisle warned as his palm jerked up to silence her. He settled his face back into that phony smile. "We returned because Alice foresaw that one of us would find happiness here," he murmured silkily. "Though that seems to have changed."

Wait, the parasite had said in the hospital that they'd both come and continue to stay for _Bella_.

A slow burn was consuming his gut as he took a step toward the doctor. "Stop speaking in riddles, motherfucker," he ground out through clenched teeth.

"She's Edward's singer," Rosalie snorted with a huff. "And he can't let her go."

"Rose!" Carlisle bellowed, spinning around on her with a grating hiss. The female standing beside him put her hand on his arm as she shot an apologetic glance out toward Jacob.

"Carlisle, why don't Rosalie and I excuse ourselves," she soothed.

He heaved a sigh and then nodded, slipping his hand up to the nape of her neck and pulling her forehead into a kiss. "Thank you darling," he murmured.

But Jacob now was torn between the confusing new information and the increasingly frenetic thoughts of Embry as he scoured the back roads looking for a scent or Charlie's car.

"What's a singer!" Jacob bit out, as he tried to keep his physical sight grounded in the scene before him and not the worrisome images flashing through his mind's eye. He could feel the entire Pack ramping up with each frantic turn of empty road ahead of Embry.

"Tell him Carlisle," the doctor's mate urged, as she wrapped her arm around Rosalie's shoulders in a clearly motherly fashion. It was the strangest thing Jacob had ever seen. "Then he'll understand how much we care."

Care? They didn't give a fuck about anything but themselves.

Carlisle's nostrils flared as he turned back to Jacob. "Jacob, like I've said, that original vision changes and shifts," he murmured with burlesque calm. "A singer is a human who calls to a vampire like no other. Edward came to find his mate."

The words dropped from the demon's lips like a nuclear bomb and decimated any lingering shreds of Jacob's sanity.

"His WHAT?!" Jacob roared, springing forward with a gnashing of teeth. Immediately Jasper and the big one congealed between him and the thing that had _dared_ to utter such blasphemy. His Pack's agitated howls clawed the distant night as his rage seared through their bonds like Napalm.

"Even though it appears she's chosen another, we still care for her," Carlisle continued in that low hypnotic croon. "And if - by some vile twist of fate - she does become one of our kind, we can assist her with that transformation."

Jacob heard his unspoken inference a clearly as if he'd yelled it: Edward was waiting around to get another chance. And **that**'s why that skinny leech wasn't here, because if he were, he'd already be dead.

"That's **NEVER** gonna happen, motherfucker," he rasped through his growls as his wolf rose up like a tsunami from the deep. "This treaty's fucking finished and you're fuck-"

Jacob choked on his words as his hand snapped up to clutch over the explosion of pain in his chest. Stumbling backwards, his blind eyes wildly raked the ground as he sifted through his Pack's lupine minds.

"Where is she?" he rasped desperately to himself. Lunging for Paul, he grabbing the beast's jaws in clawed hands and seared his words into those burning eyes. "WHERE IS SHE!" he bellowed to his Pack.

"Oh no!" a high chiming voice had his head snapping around to the sight of that witch pitching forward into Jasper's arms. Her wide unfocused eyes flitted blindly over the meadow. "It isn't time!" she wailed. "Carlisle… it's _James_."

Bella felt impaled on that sinister stare. Like he'd fluently lanced through her widened eyes and straight through her heart. She knew who this was and what he was after - she'd have been able to see it in his ruthless gaze even if Jacob hadn't already told her.

He was craving revenge.

Thin bloodless lips stretched back further in a smile that turned her blood to ice. "Because you _are_ special, aren't you, girl? Their leader's mate?" One brow arched as his breathy voice pushed forward like a serpent, winding around her with a clammy strength. "And I wonder," he licked his lips with a coral tongue. "How he let you out of his sight - this was hardly any sport at all."

Bella's eyes tried frantically to blink free like trapped moths.

"Of course, I'm guilty of the same," he coughed a laugh while his face flashed in a toothy grin that looked maniacal. Just as abruptly, it was annulled by an expressionless mask while those eyes burned intensely into hers.

"But Victoria wasn't nearly so..." he paused, a smile flickering over his lips while his hand came up between them.

Bella swallowed thickly with a little squirting sound in her throat that echoed in her ears as she shied away. Her every instinct screamed at her to flee, but she knew he'd be on her in a second and something deep within her didn't want to give him the satisfaction. So she put everything she had into not flinching away as that torn yellowed fingernail stretched across the distance.

"You're so… _fragile_," he breathed, cocking his head to the other side like a lizard as that cold, sharp point stroked down her cheek.

A mortifying whimper escaped her lips.

He chuckled like the dry rattle of autumn leaves as his hand slipped from her face to finger one of her curls.

A plate clattered to the counter, and Bella jolted as she sucked in a sharp breath. At the same time the vampire's hand had snapped out with lightning reflexes and grabbed Madge's wrist.

The older woman's eyes were locked on the restraining fist on her arm, looking like sentience was struggling to surface from whatever spell this creature had put her under. But she'd brought the vampire an empty porcelain plate - which was pointedly symbolic - and was obviously not in her right mind.

"You brought a snack," he whispered, those feral eyes now focused on the bandage on the woman's index finger and completely unconcerned by anything else. "I may need a little aperitif so I don't slip and ruin the game," he leered as his other hand reached up and pulled at the putty piece of plastic. "Let's see if you're my type."

"Don't," Bella choked, a silent scream pushing the plea from her throat in a rasp.

The vampire's eyes darted over to her with wry a smile and in a preternatural second the bandage was off and the healing red cut being pinched between two sallow fingers.

The wound popped open with the pressure and, like it was in slow motion, drops of crimson fell to the empty plate. All the ambient noise in the room had been drowned long ago by the white noise of panic, but, like the ticking of a clock, she heard each drop of moist fearful life splash against the porcelain.

Bella's stomach lunged up her throat as he rubbed his index finger through the small puddle of red and then turned to ferry it to his lips while he pointedly held her gaze captive. He slowly licked it off his fingers with a suggestive swirl of his tongue as his eyelids fluttered indulgently.

"She'll do for now," he purred as his eyes popped back open. He turned back to the waitress with a saccharine smile. "Why don't you take us out back?"

"You're wasting time!" Bella hissed, surging to her feet.

The vampire's brow shot up in surprise.

"If you want revenge, you'd better do it fast…" she continued, the shake to her voice betraying her trembling heart. _She needed to get this monster out of here._

That chilling smile reappeared as his eyes flicked over her like she was a bug that was mildly interesting. "Why's that, girl?" he murmured.

Bella lifted her chin - she'd always stood up for Jake and she always would. "Because he's coming for you and, when he does, he _will_ kill you."

The vampire chuckled, his eyes narrowing to half-moons with derisive humor.

Without a word, he glanced at Madge. "I'm through," he whispered. And suddenly the waitress turned away from them, scampering into the back and holding her finger in her mouth while she muttered senselessly.

In the next instant the vampire had unfolded to his feet and snaked a hand around the nape of Bella's neck in a single fluid movement. "Oh, you're _so very brave_," he gushed sarcastically as his fingers bit into her neck and he pulled her roughly into his side. "Let's see what I can do about that."

Several diners had turned their heads up to the front of the room, one burly trucker standing up with a frown at the scene. But as the vampire swept the room with an icy smile, one by one, each person returned to their meal like he'd flipped a switch.

Bella shivered uncontrollably against the monster's side as he dragged her with him around the counter. As tall as he was, she stumbled as he held her neck with that vise-like grip against his side and silently dragged her down the hall toward the service door. His clothes smelled of stale death and soured fear and finally her twisting stomach lurched up her throat.

A wretch convulsed up her body, making her pitch forward with the force as she gagged on acid. She wished she'd eaten something so she could have puked all over him

But the monster held her fast, now dragging her limp feet across the floor. "Now, that's a little better, girl," he chuckled, pushing open the back door.

Bella gasped in the cleansing cool evening air. "It's just because you stink," she rasped as her feet struggled to find purchase.

It was odd, but the closer she got toward inevitable death, the more her fear was overtaken by contempt. _This_ was the vampire who had _broken_ Brady and _killed_ Harry… and was now threatening _Jake_.

And she, Bella Swan, was _not_ going to go down like a wuss … even if that were easier said than done.

That strange hollow laugh wheezed under her ear, and suddenly she was being shoved back against a wall by two bruising hands on her upper arms.

At the head spinning movement, a squeak of fear jettisoned over her lips. Bella quickly bit her lip down to cage the others rallying with the panic in her chest.

"You see, I could say the same thing, girl," he chuckled breathlessly as his wild eyes ran over her face. He slowly leaned forward and Bella squirmed in the vises that pinned her against the wall. As she frantically tried to twist away, he pressed his face into her neck and took a long audible breath that made chill bumps explode and flee across her skin in terror.

His cold hard face pressed into her skin as he dragged his nose up her neck with frigid laps of his tongue and Bella's breath hitched in fear through quivering nostrils. She wanted to scream, but she was afraid if she did, a human - maybe even her father only across the street - would come to her aid.

And she knew what would happen then.

He pulled back, bobbing up to take up her entire frame of vision with a frightening smile and eyes that were gleefully maniacal. "But funny thing," he licked his thin lips provocatively . "You stink like the dog's _spit_, not his seed."

Bella's heart finally stopped flailing in her chest as her eyes widened in shock.

"But under that you smell _so sweet_…" he crooned, dragging the words out with a suggestive leer. "So young, innocent…" he bit his lip as those dead eyes washed over her face, not even bothering to focus. "See I've been patiently searching for _just_ the right thing and then I found out about you," he murmured in a strange monotone that hitched with breathy chuckles. "And I thought simply turning you would do the trick - it would drive him _mad_, I'm sure. But now I wonder what he'd do if _I took_ what he wants _first_?" The obscene words were barely audible, more dry frigid puffs of rotted air over her face.

"Go to hell," Bella choked, blinking furiously at the fearful tears that were burning behind her eyes. In a last flailing effort, she started kicking her legs wildly.

He slammed her painfully back against the wall with the length of his hard body.

That leer stretched out into a frightening toothy grin. "How bout I take you with me?" he breathed. "I think you and I will get to know each other well, girl." He pushed his hips against her suggestively, grinding her pelvis into the wall with his hardened body.

That was it.

Without her permission that latent scream burst from her throat, but his hand was instantly over her mouth, smothering it into nothing but painful buzzing vibration in her head. Instinctively Bella bit down fiercely on that stony hand… and nearly broke a tooth.

"I think you have it backwards," the vampire sniffed several chuckles. "Oh, he _said_ thrall didn't work on you, but I'd never _dreamed_ you'd be so much fun," he smiled heartlessly as his eyes darted over her face and his body thrust languidly against her. " I think I'll wait till next time to bite. Or maybe the next. I can have you whenever I want."

Bella's eyes widened as his other hand released her arm and dragged down her side, slithering down her hip with an vulgar caress before slipping into the tight space between them.

"How about a quickie?" he winked.

Sucking in heaving breaths through her nose as that hand muzzled her mouth, silent tears bled from her eyes as Bella fought that stony grip with everything she had.

But suddenly he was yanked violently away, dragging her with him until she fell painfully to the ground.

Hisses boiled the dim alley as she pushed to her hands and knees and searched with frantic eyes.

In front of her, was no other than… Edward Cullen.

Her tormentor had been thrown into a dumpster in the back and was crawling back out of it like a nightmare.

"You vile disgusting animal!" Edward spat, prowling forward and baring teeth.

The other vampire poured down into a crouch and returned his hiss with glittering eyes. "What? You object to a little fun?"

With a snarl, Edward charged the monster, but he lithely leaped over the assault in a fluent tumble. Edward whipped around and lunged again, but the other ripped him of his feet and into a throw that echoed with a boom down the alley.

"Later, girl," he laughed with a backwards glance, and then crawled up the wall like a spider and disappeared.

It happened so fast.

In the next instant, Edward was back before her, picking her up off the ground.

"No!" Bella shrilled, jerking out of his hands as she stumbled back. "Get him!"

"I dare not leave you in case there are others," he murmured, gathering her again in his arms. "Oh, Bella. I'm sorry I got here so late. The horrible things that were in his mind," he choked with a grimace. "I will track him down and flay him alive for even _thinking_ about you in such a way."

Bella blinked, as she pulled her arms out of his grasp and took another step back. "Y-you can read minds?" she quavered.

Edward smiled benignly. "Every mind except yours," he whispered, reaching out a hand and pushing her hair back from her face.

Bella flinched, drawing her shoulder to her ear. She struggled to put her mind in gear from where it had gone simply numb from shock and trauma.

"And I'll l never let it happen again," he breathed, stepping closer. "I will _always_ protect you Bella."

"So does Jake," she bit back automatically taking another step back and stumbling over a cardboard box.

Edward caught her arm and steadied her. "And where is he, darling?" he arched a meaningful brow.

"Meeting with your family," she snapped, pulling her arm again from his grasp and taking another step back. He was always trying to _touch_ her. "Why aren't you with them?"

"Because I couldn't wait any longer," he murmured. "I need to talk to you, Bella."

"Me?" Bella's brow furrowed as she took another teetering step back and found her back against the wall.

_Trapped_.

"Yes," he folded his hands in front of him urbanely. "I'm a patient man, you see, but it's time for you to know you have a choice."

Bella swallowed thickly. There was something strange and manic glittering in his eyes. Warning bells went off in her muddled head; she still wasn't safe.

"What kind of choice," she decided to keep him talking, as she started edging along the wall toward the mouth of the alley.

Edward smiled affably and braced his hand against the wall with contrasting abruptness. "You heard that Alice sees the future," he related as if he hadn't just brazenly blocked her escape. "Two years ago she saw _our future together_, Bella. That's why we came," his mouth softened into sickly sentimental. "I've waited for you for a 107 years."

She froze, her hands falling to the wall behind her and gripping the brick. "What?" she breathed.

"You're my singer," he gushed, sounding giddy and absolutely off his rocker. "Your _scent_, your very essence calls to me like no other," he took another step toward her and Bella pressed her head back against the grounding wall as she gulped down a swallow.

"It's the equivalent of an imprint for our kind."

_How did he know about that? Had Jake told him?_

Edward's golden eyes softened as he drew in a relish5ng breath through his nose. "You're my own personal brand of heroin."

"Um," Bella licked her lips nervously. "That doesn't sound very healthy." She tried to inject a little dry humor into that delirious intensity.

"Oh but it is," he insisted earnestly. "Alice saw our future, you know - let me tell you about it," he sniffed with a blissful smile. "I saw our _wedding_, darling. Alice orchestrated her usual extravagance and you were a stunning bride…all your friends were there. Even Jacob."

Bella couldn't help the indignation that ignited in her gut. She quickly clamped her lips closed.

"Then you and I flew off for a honeymoon on the beaches of Brazil," he crooned, stepping in a little closer as his hand came up absently to touch a lock of her hair like it was spun gold. "You begged me to turn you," he gasped breathlessly, as he twisted a curl slowly around his finger . "And I did. You received the precious gifts of eternal youth and beauty. And we lived happily into our forever."

His eyes had gone misty and he was leaning in entirely too close.

"That's someone else's fairy tale," she choked as she tried to shrink against the wall.

Edward's smile was frighteningly unfazed. "It could be yours, my love," he whispered.

Bella's eyes paced between that quixotic stare as her poor battered brain tried to figure out what the hell to do.

"Edward…" she began softly, offering him her best attempts at a sympathetic smile. "It's _always_ been him," she said gently. "I _love_ Jake. I've already chosen."

A minute furrow pulled at his brow as his gaze ran over her face in confusion. "But I know you could love me too. I've seen it," he insisted. "Bella, I can give you so much more. I have the wealth, education… I can give you the _world_."

"But I don't want the world," Bella begged him to understand with her eyes. "I just want him. Maybe a little wooden house. Friends …a family I love. _Simple_ things."

"I can give you that too," he frowned as his hand stilled in her hair. "You have _options_, Bella."

Bella shook her head fervently. "I don't _want_ options!" Panic was starting to rise again in her chest. She was already a burned out husk from adrenaline and shock - she couldn't deal with this.

"I _want_ you to have them," he contended, his hand slipping down to passionately grip her shoulder. "Just _try_ Bella. _Try_ to think about what we could be together," he beseeched in a rasping whisper as he leaned down intensely. "The life I could give you, free of worries and death. How happy you'd be!"

His eyes snapped down to her lips now frightfully inches away. "Just try," he breathed as he leaned closer…

"Edward, stop!" she shrieked. And Bella's hand hauled up and slapped him with everything she had.

"Ow!" she shrilled grabbing her throbbing palm in her other hand.

Edward had jerked back with an expression of patent shock. "Forgive me," he gasped. " I just -…"

A metallic click echoed of the stone alleyway, and Bella's face whipped around to see her father silhouetted by the street lights beyond. He had both hands on the gun he had steadily aimed at the vampire standing only a foot away.

"If you don't back off right now, Cullen," he spat the words through clenched teeth. "I'll find out how many rounds it takes to put one a your kind down."

"Dad!" Bella shrieked, lunging toward him.

Edward's hand suddenly wrapped around her arm, making her stumble as he pulled her back to beseeching eyes. "I'll never stop fighting for you until you accept that you deserve _so much more_," he hissed passionately.

"Let me go," she spat.

With a glance up at her father, Edward released her arm.

Whipping around she sprinted toward her father, colliding with his side and throwing her arms around his waist as she buried her face in his comforting polyester.

"Chief Swan, I saved your -.."

"If you _ever_ touch her again," her father interrupted him brusquely as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "So help me God, I'll figure out how to rip you to shreds _before_ Jake gets his turn."

'

"If you don't tell me where she is…" Jacob's guttural snarl sprayed spittle as he shook Carlisle's body to the sound of ripping cloth. He held the leech off the ground over his head by two fistfuls of groaning cloth.

Jasper and the other male froze on their way up from where they'd been thrown in Jacob's frenetic explosion to get to their leader.

"Jacob we'll tell you everything," Carlisle soothed in that serene voice that was like fingernails on a chalkboard. But his piss-yellow eyes betrayed his fear. "Alice, what do you see?" he murmured, not tearing his gaze from the wolf's molten hate peering out of Jacob's human face.

When an answer didn't come immediately, Jacob turned with a growl to the little witch who was frozen in an unseeing stupor not ten feet away.

An echoing snarl percolated in the barrel chest of the wolf trembling on his haunches in the grass. Paul's eager yellow eyes stayed locked on his Alpha, waiting for his signal. He knew better than interfere with Jacob's kill.

"Alice!" Carlisle urged tensely through gritted teeth.

"Oh, thank goodness!" she piped blinking out of her daze with a bright smile on her face. It immediately crumpled into a displeased frown. "Jasper, your arm," she pouted, stooping down to the grass to pick up the twitching limb.

"You're all fucking nuts," Jacob hissed hatefully. "What d'you see, bitch!"

"Don't worry," she chirped, skipping over to where her mate congealed to his feet. "Edward got her in time. She's safe."

_That hardly counted as safe_. A savage roar ripped from his chest as the cloth finally ripped in his trembling hands. As the leech fell to the ground he caught another handful of clothes. He slammed him down to his feet, yanking him forward a step, and sneered down into his widened eyes.

"WHERE!" Jacob bellowed. His entire body was vibrating like a jackhammer.

Only the depth of his concern for his imprint allowed him to keep his enraged wolf from overtaking him like a blistering wildfire. The beast was rearing up with a crushing rage that Jacob had never before felt in his life - he was starting to buckle under the sheer magnitude of the maelstrom inside him.

But he needed this last piece of information, and needed to keep this form until he got it.

"Somewhere in town…" Alice replied pertly, as Jasper wrapped his reattached arm around her shoulders and scowled at Jacob. "James was at some kind of counter with a plate. A restaurant?"

"The diner!" he hissed, meeting Paul's gaze and watching the message filter through his Pack in his mind.

Without another word, Jacob surrendered his tattered humanity. The wolf turned him inside out with the force of its violent explosion from his body.

The beast tipped it's head to the sky with a thunderous roar of rage.

"**Where the hell **_**is**_** he**! ?" Bella's father yelled into the cell held tersely to his cheek as he jerked the steering wheel with the other. The cruiser's lights were flashing as he ground the engine into a roar under the strident siren.

She would have seen the fact that her father had started dialing Jacob's number as soon as he'd gotten her in the car as a positive sign, but right now she couldn't even think. Or feel. Or _anything_.

Her body was shivering uncontrollably even though her father had turned the heat up to high.

"Yeah I got her…" he paused glancing over at where Bella was curled up in a ball on the seat and staring back at him with eyes that were permanently glued open. "They didn't hurt you baby, right?"

Bella gulped, pulling her father's flannel shirt tighter around her chest as she tried to understand the words.

"Baby?" he crooned, the phone lowering from his cheek as his eyes ran worriedly over her deer in headlights stare.

Finally Bella managed a minute shake of her head.

"She's alright. Real shook up…" Charlie rasped, returning his eyes to the road as his mustache bunched up with his grimace and he listed to the other end of the call.

…

"They came after her, Billy!" he hissed, his eyes cutting over warily to where she shivered in the seat. "All she can say is it's that one from Rez but Cullen got there in time. But when I found her, she'd just slapped _his_ skinny ass down! An' I been callin' and callin that boy a' yours!"

…

"Broke!?" her father cackled, sounding like a maniac. "If he's gonna be chief of some-… " he paused shifting in his seat. "Of some kinda pack a' werewolves in _my town_, I' **better damn well always** be able t'get a hold of him!"

Bella pulled her knees tighter against her chest - she couldn't take his anger right now.

…

"Billy, I **swear**, if you don't have that boy over' my house by the time I get there, I'm gonna-…"

…

"Alright…" he rasped, squaring his shoulders with a little resetting shake of his head. "Alright. Yeah, that'd be good." Blowing a breath from his cheeks, he lowered the phone and tossed it down on the seat.

The movement made her jump. She felt like every last nerve was a needle, hemming her shallow breaths and hummingbird heart.

"Shh," her father soothed, reaching a hand across the seat…. slowly.

"J-Jake?" his name shivered over numb lips.

"He's comin' Bells," he murmured as his fingers brushed tentatively over her bare ankle. "Billy's still over at Suzie's." A single nervous laugh burst from under his mustache. "Leah an' Seth were goin' nuts. Exploded into -… into those things _in the house_." He offered her a wan smile. "Several of 'em are over there now tryin' to help out and they got some way to give 'em the message."

"Pack mind," Bella whispered, subtly pulling her leg out from under her father's touch. She just felt so raw.

Her father uneasily pulled his hand back across the seat. "Yeah, somethin' like that." He put both hands on the wheel and sat up a little more. "So what-… what happened, Bells? " he asked softly.

Bella blinked several times over her dry eyes. "He-…I-…" she tried to get the connection to her mouth to work. But failed miserably.

Her father glanced over at her several times and then released a long breath. "Sorry, baby. I'm sorry I wasn't there."

"There's nothing you could do," Bella breathed, turning her body away from her father and stiffly resting her cheek against the car door.

It took a few seconds for Bella to hear them.

Without a conscious thought, she jerked up as her hand darted out to the switch on the roof, cutting the sirens.

The wolves' low haunting howls rose up eerily to take their place.

With a gasp, Bella whipped around, going up on her knees and pressing her face against the car window. "They're here," she exhaled the words along with some of that unbearable pressure in her chest.

A set of glowing yellow eyes, bobbed eerily out in the dark woods, keeping pace with her father's speeding car. Bella frantically hit the button for the window and the pane hummed down.

"Bells," her father worried tensely behind her.

The wind made her blink as she craned out the window and the giant wolf fell in closer from his parallel course in the woods. But it wasn't Jacob .

Some strange instinct told her it was Embry.

"Emb?" she called, the wind stealing her voice.

The wolf tipped his muzzle up and loosed a long baying howl.

Bella smiled for the first time that night and collapsed against the door, her eyes glued to that wiry athletic form and its easy loping gait. Her father was tearing up these back roads doing fifty at least, and the animal looked like it was having to temper its pace to match the speed while a chorus of intertwining howls pulled at the night.

Suddenly another set of eyes bobbed into view in the distance. The Embry wolf turned its head with a yip of greeting as a silvery shape congealed from shadow. The gray wolf cantered out of the trees and then sprang high into the air, leaping both Pack mate and cruiser.

Bella's hands pulled herself unthinkingly across the dashboard as her eyes followed it.

Paul landed on the driver's side of the vehicle without even losing pace.

"Geezis!" her father choked, his foot reflexively tapping the brake.

Bella caught herself against the windshield, and then pulled herself back to the window as the scenery continued to whip by. Their house was around the corner and Bella found herself feeling grateful that the only other residents of this little corner of the woods went out on a Friday night or elderly and in bed by seven. Because the sight of a police cruiser turning the corner flanked by two giant wolves would have been difficult to explain away.

The wolves didn't seem to care.

Her father jerked the car around the bend.

"Dad, stop!" she shrieked, the words exploding from her lips without a single thought behind them.

But as her father dutifully slammed on the brakes not 100 feet from their house, Bella suddenly understood what her heart had already known.

Barreling across the lawn in a frenetic flurry of russet fur was a wolf that dwarfed the other two beasts. Those yellow eyes were myopically locked with hers as it charged in a unwavering intercept for the car that showed no signs of stopping.

"Holy shit!" her father rasped as his frantic arms pulled back.

Bella shrieked squeezing her eyes closed against the impending collision.

But the thunderous impact was the sound of flesh against metal and her desperate eyes popped open to the sound of rending steel. She had a brief glimpse of Jacob's crazed face and wild yellow eyes, before warm hands were whipping her through the non-existent door into his arms.

"Jake," she quavered pressing her face into his neck as he fell back to the ground outside of the car and his huge body melted around her.

He was everywhere: warm skin, musky heat, frenetic puffs of moist air. Agitation milked inhuman whines from his throat as he snuffled over her, pulling her down from his neck and frantically pushing his nose under her jaw. His hot wet tongue started lapping up her neck while those plaintive whines bled from his soul.

His body was human, but Jacob was certainly not.

That sobering realization had her hands slithering up his chest, searching for his jaw as he continued his manic inventory with hot tongue and warm breath.

"Jake," she crooned. "Jacob." Her hands finally found his cheeks and tried to pull him away as he lapped over her jaw and buried his nose in the hollow behind her ear. There he stayed, panting heavily.

"Heeyyyy," she soothed. "I'm okay. I'm safe." She smoothed her palm over his cheek and then raked it soothingly through his hair.

His body was trembling around her and it broke her heart… and worried her to death. They'd both been pushed way past their breaking point already and - from what she knew of them so far - she couldn't even imagine what this had done to his wolf.

"It's the scent Bella," Embry's human voice ventured quietly.

She turned to find him, but didn't get the chance.

In a lightning movement Jacob was whipping her up - clutching her so soundly against his chest she barely felt the snapping force - as he sprang fluidly into a crouch. A deep ominous growl boiled under her cheek like the soundtrack to the muscles slithering under his skin. That savage sound, so close to her, turned her blood to Freon and her body exploded into chill bumps.

But Bella acted on instinct.

Gasping against choking fear, she turned into those jumping pecs and pressed her shaking lips to the caramel skin.

Once.

Twice.

His entire body seized as his growls stuttered in his chest. It gave her the confidence to soldier on.

"Jacob," she murmured, as she nuzzled his shoulder and her arms snaked up around his neck. "Jake, I _need_ you."

Bella's hands blindly smoothed over his shuddering steel deltoids as she closed her eyes against everything else - fathers, Pack, the fact that Jacob was losing it - and focused on how that soft living skin soothed her even stretched over lupine iron as it was now. She dragged her nose along the elegant line of his collar bone and gathered the earthy virile scent of him in hitching gasps.

His strength, his warmth, the way his tender hands held her like she was made of the most fragile glass even while his body jerked and quivered with rage… it softened that crusty scab of emotional shut-down that had formed over the raw wounds gouged by trauma.

"I was so scared, Jake," she whispered, tipping her face up blindly to press her lips against his comforting pulse. "I-… he-…" words dissolved in the tears that finally bubbled up from the twisted mess inside her. And this time she let them flow freely as she snaked her arms around his neck and turned into his innate comfort.

"I… I _need_-.." she sobbed, burying her face in the haven of his jaw. Her shoulders started shaking with the deluge of anguish that finally broke through the dam.

A huge hand stroked up her back and molded to the back of her head and she felt his muscles viscerally melt back to human. And he slithered down to the ground as he climbed out of that burning purgatory between his two forms.

"Bella," he rasped, his voice hoarse and fallow as his arms tightened around her body.

Like they'd done all of their lives, the balance shifted between them, tipping the scales toward her need and away from his insanity.

"You're okay honey," he murmured, human sentience ironing the savagery out of his voice word by word. "You're okay." His palm stroked over her hair.

As he slowly relaxed, those muscled arms seamlessly transformed from fervent clutch to a warm embrace of bygone days. Jacob's hugs had always been magical. Those confident earnest arms had gathered all the little pulverized pieces of herself and held them together when she'd shattered under life's blunt force on more than one occasion.

Now was no exception. Bella felt him fill in all the little cracks with that wordless lupine croon he hummed against her temple as he rocked her body like a child. For several minutes or hours - she couldn't be sure - she cried freely in galloping full-body sobs. She let herself feel all the violation and near-death terror of the last half hour.

While Jacob's comfort folded it safely away into memory.

When most of the unbearable pressure had finally been released, leaving nothing but her bruised puckered shell, she released a hiccupping sigh and packed away her sorrow. Drawing in a last hitching breath of his warmth, she lifted her face slowly from his neck.

His eyes were aching and worried as they peered at her from under that furrowed brow. "Bella, I-..I-..," he whispered brokenly.

Bella mutely shook her head as her hand slipped from around his neck to ghost over his cheek and smooth back over his ebony hair. Blinking back to reality, she realized Jacob had slithered to the ground and he was cradling her in his arms by the side of her father's abused cruiser right down the road from her house.

Her eyes darted to her father - pinning her with worried eyes and a complex frown - being fenced in by Paul's hulking human body at the front of the car. Embry was standing protectively nearby.

Bella sniffled and pulled her arm around to wipe her nose gracelessly on the sleeve of her father's flannel as she returned her eyes to Jacob's.

"I need a shower," she whispered as she shifted in his embrace and looped her arms around his neck.

Because she did. She could still see his nostrils quivering and feel the rhythmic tremors that shook his huge frame, but more than that, she wanted to wash off the memory of those cold hard hands. _Both_ sets them.

Without a word, Jacob unfolded smoothly to his feet, lifting her bridal style along with him as if she weighed nothing.

Bella was suddenly exhausted. Her father, the doorless car, the tattered pieces of the night around her… they were all inconsequential. She simply didn't have the bandwidth to care. Her cheek fell heavily to Jacob's broad shoulder as she squeezed her arms around his neck.

"Paul, gimme your shorts and head up patrols," Jacob murmured quietly, the usual imperial bass of his voice wrung out to an empty husk.

Bella's heavy lids blinked back open at that - she'd forgotten he was nude.

No one spoke as Jacob began moving toward the house, his stride faltering for a moment with the whisper of cloth as someone invariably helped him step into cover.

"Emb, go help the others," he whispered. "Jared's heading back now. Tell 'em he's got the Pack."

At that, Bella's head lifted as her gaze ran over Jacob's stoic profile. She'd forgotten that through all of the insanity - _all the time_ - he saw the others in his head. Her gaze was drawn to Embry's worried face standing beside them and he offered her a pitiful smile that looked like he'd been sucking on a lemon.

Her father had said something was wrong with Leah and Seth. If his Pack needed him… "Jake," she began. "If y-…"

"No," he bit off her words without a glance as he began striding down the road with his fluid gait.

Her gaze ran over that stony expression with concern and then flitted over his shoulder to her father and Embry. Paul was already gone.

"Embry can you haul that door up to the yard before you head out," Charlie mumbled tiredly, surveying his cruiser as he pushed his hand through his hair. "I'm jus' gonna pull it on up."

Bella collapsed back against Jacob's shoulder with a sigh. Everyone was a total wreck. But Bella was too, and as much as she wanted to help everyone else with their burdens, she couldn't do it until she had some semblance of sanity herself.

Jacob felt like he was floating his pace was so smooth, and soon her eyes were lulled into closing as she felt his body ascend the front steps of her house. She opened her eyes again, as he rearranged his grip to cradling her in one massive arm and watched him fished the extra key from the top of the shutters like he was on automatic pilot.

His face was an emotionless mask.

His movements were precise and clipped, in flagrant contrast to the way his muscles bunched and shimmied in his chest and neck. It was like that first day on her lawn and then in the garage, when she'd had the distinct feeling he was just a burnt-out hollow shell going through the motions.

And it made her realize just how far he'd come in a week.

"Jake," she whispered.

He didn't even acknowledge that she'd spoken as he closed the door crisply behind him and crossed the living room to the stairs.

"Are you okay?" she asked again, pulling back a little more and trying to get him to meet her eyes.

Wordlessly he took the stairs - three at a time - as his massive shoulders bumped incidentally against the narrow walls with the motion. His gaze was trained on his objective and, in contrast to his body, not a muscle twitched in his face.

Bella bit the corner of her lip and pulled it into her mouth along with any more pointless questions.

_Neither_ of them were okay.

He stopped at the top of the stairs - between her bedroom and the bathroom directly across the hall - and released a quiet breath. He just stood there for a moment, as still as a statue except for his muscles which seemed to suddenly jump under her palms.

He couldn't let her go, she realized.

"Jacob, put me down please," she whispered, hoping it would help.

She saw his Adam's apple bob once with a swallow, and then she was slowly being lowered to her feet. She slipped her arms from around his neck and let her palm linger over his heart for a moment as he straightened - still frighteningly staring off into the distance like some kind of machine. His heart however was going a million pounding miles per second.

Bella drew in a breath through her nose, closing her eyes at its apex dolefully - and then let her hand slip down to her side as she walked numbly into her bedroom.

Words wouldn't help - not right now - even if by some miracle she could find the right ones to offer him with her own churning brain. She needed to take a redemptive shower as well as some time to herself to sort out her own mess first.

She pulled a shirt and a pair of yoga pants out of the drawer, folding some underwear discreetly in them and then turned around. And nearly jumped out of her skin. He was standing silently behind her, staring down at her with unreadable eyes set in simmering severity.

She didn't know why she was surprised.

With a sad smile, she dragged her fingers reassuringly over his chest as she shimmied by him and back out into the hall. Of course he was right on her heel.

She set her clothes beside the sink and turned around to his hulking frame filling up the bathroom doorway. That intensity was unnerving and Bella found her eyes pacing between his, searching for any glimpse of his soul behind that obsidian wall.

She found none.

She cleared her throat uncomfortably. "I'll just be a minute," she whispered as her hands found the door.

Jacob blinked twice - the movement seeming extreme in that expression - but didn't say a word. He was obviously fighting a private war inside that stoic shell; she could see it in the corded tendons in his neck. It physically hurt to see him suffer and in the end she decided to rip the band-aid off quickly for both of them.

Biting her lip, Bella closed the door in his face.

Jacob wasn't used to failure. As a human boy most things had come easily and those that didn't (like school work) were simply cast off with a carefree smile.

But, make no mistake, Jacob had failed her.

Completely.

His fingers dug into the molding of the bathroom door as he braced himself against it, frenetically counting her rapid heartbeats over the whisper of the shower. In a little over 18 minutes he'd logged 1,983.

1,984.

1,985.

It was the only way he could distract his wolf from alternately bashing down the door and grabbing her up in his arms, or tearing out into a bloody night of indiscriminate carnage.

Right now, he hated himself, pure and simple.

"You want some coffee?"

At Charlie's voice, Jacob lifted his hanging head as he drew in a long breath through his nose. He straightened, pushing off the bathroom doorframe and rubbed his palms over his face. Steeling himself, he turned to where her father was standing at the foot of the stairs craning his neck up with a frown and a green ceramic mug.

His expression was stern (his cop-face, as Bella called it) but his eyes were undeniably worried. And no wonder: Jacob had acted like the raving lunatic he was, culminating in 19 minutes of immovably watching a bathroom door.

But sympathy was the _last_ thing Jacob needed. It turned his stomach.

He shook his head tersely as he took the few strides to the top of the staircase and collapsed on the top step. His muscles were aching and jittery from fighting to stay in his human form. With a soft groan, he propped his elbows on his knees and let his head hang, clawing his hands into the hair at the back of his neck.

"Yeah, I didn't really think you needed it," Charlie mused as he sat sideways on the bottom step and tipped the mug to his own lips.

Jacob wanted him to leave.

Charlie had other ideas. "You're dad's on his way over," he announced, swallowing noisily. "Bringin' pizza and a _shirt_. Didn't even know you owned one," he sniffed a wry laugh. The paternal indignation mixed with his dry humor might have been amusing under different circumstances.

"I know," Jacob growled.

"Yeah? That wolf-head stuff?" Charlie's head jerked up with furrowed brow. That candid curiosity (and purposeful butchering of the term) normally would have made him chuckle in how it reminded him so much of Bella, but right now it was just fucking annoying.

Jacob tipped his face up with a scowl. "Whattaya want, Charlie?"

That valiant casual façade dropped like a lead curtain to wrath. "I wanna know _what the hell they want with my daughter_," he hissed.

The man's fiery indignation strangely soothed the wolf. _He was on their side._

Jacob rolled his lips as his gaze darted between those challenging eyes. He was really too worn out and torn up right now to deal with this, but the man _deserved_ to know. He _needed_ to understand just what the stakes were and how high the odds were against them.

Jacob raked his hands brusquely through his hair as his sat up and cracked his neck. "That fucking Cullen thinks she's destined or some shit," he drew in a deep breath.

"Tobehismate." He pushed the repugnant words out on a single burning growl, his fingers digging into his thighs. His wolf roared repudiation through his bones, his muscles jumping so sharply in resonance that several ligaments audibly ripped.

"What!" Charlie slammed his mug down on the stairs, coffee heedlessly sloshing over the side.

It was just the distraction Jacob needed to reign back in the beast.

"Where the _fuck_ did he get that one?" the man literally snarled. It seemed Charlie's vocabulary was considerably more colorful when it came to his daughter.

"They' got some kinda witch who gets visions," he twisted the words with ridicule.

Charlie just stared up at him as his face reddened with the pressure building behind that frown.

"I dunno," Jacob huffed, slapping a palm down his face. He still hadn't processed that meeting with the Cullens - for obvious reasons - but it didn't really matter what twisted-ass logic those leeches had. "They're all fuckin' nuts, Charlie."

"Well," Charlie's voice was gruff and acidic. "I told that Cullen boy if he touched her again, I was gonna figure out how to kill 'em and then let you finish the job."

Jacob's brow shot up in surprise, and the two men exchanged appraising stares. There was a subtle message couched in Charlie's bluster: he was telling him he was choosing to _trust_ Jacob.

With his daughter.

"What about that other one?" Charlie grumbled.

"James," Jacob spat. "D' you see him?"

Charlie shook his head. "All Bella said was Cullen got there just in time."

Jacob fell back over his thighs, smothering his face and his disgrace in his palms. _He_ should have been there.

"Jake?"

Charlie's voice fished him out of the undertow of self-loathing. Jacob's hands slithered down to his thighs as he opened his eyes to where the man was frowning up at him.

"He's the one who's been playing mind games with the Pack," he choked.

"'Cause you killed that -… th-that other one?" Charlie stammered, his body going rigid as he started to put together all the despicable pieces.

"Yeah, his mate," he rasped, despair making the words stick thickly in the back of his throat. "He wants revenge. And he's gonna use Bella to get it because he figured out that fucking with _my imprint_," protective heat boiled the word and he swallowed it back down. "… is gonna bring the _whole Pack_ to its knees."

Charlie stared at him for a moment, comprehension bleeding into his face even while the blood drained.

Jacob closed his eyes on that rising dread as he collapsed over his thighs, hanging his head in shame. And he'd failed to protect her from the danger brought down on her by his own selfish needs.

He'd failed her. And he hated himself.

"Now you listen here," Charlie's terse tone, made Jacob's head jerk up to where the man was now standing at the bottom of the stairs with an intense stare. "I' seen what all you can do this afternoon, and …" Charlie swallowed thickly, pushing his hand through his hair while his eyes darted down to the floor. They returned to Jacob with convicting heat. "You damn well better keep my girl **safe**, y'hear. There ain't no one else who can do that."

There was no censure or blame in Charlie's eyes, only desperation... and the willingness to jump the rails of comfort for necessity. Jacob's shoulders settled back as the Alpha in him rose to the commission and the wolf reacted to his challenge.

"You take care of her," he breathed again, the command softening to a plea.

And _this_ is what Jacob needed: not sympathy, not accusations (that were already branded into his heart), but the refocusing of his soul's mandate that had somehow gotten muddled by a shit-storm of self-blame. Charlie was entrusting his daughter into his care. Maybe out of desperation, but with confidence and expectation.

With faith. Just like Bella.

Jacob squared his jaw as he drew in a resetting breath and sat up straighter.

"I will." It was an oath that was burned into his very soul.

Charlie's eyes paced intensely between Jacob's for a moment. "I know you will, Jake," he whispered softly. And then he turned on his heel.

"Lemme get a rag to clean this mess up," he mumbled as he strode toward the kitchen. To get some time alone to process, if Jacob had to guess.

But it wouldn't last long. Jacob could hear his father's Chevy roaring down the road a half mile away.

"My dad's here," Jacob called out after him.

But at that same moment, the whisper of the shower cut to silence. Jacob sprang to this feet and was at the bathroom door in less time than it took for him to blink. The rattle of the shower curtain prefaced a soft heaving sigh.

Jacob shoved his hands through his hair and started pacing. Back and forth in a pitiful circuit of agitated longing right outside the door.

As he went back to furtively counting each of those comforting heartbeats, he heard Charlie clomp to the front of the house. But when he heard the light footstep of his wolf carrying his father up the porch stairs, the Alpha in him _demanded_ that he step up to the plate.

Just for now.

Jacob turned on his heel and stopped at the head of the stairs, letting the mantle of duty viscerally settle over him with squared shoulders and a stoic mask. The squeak of his father's chair prefaced the sight of Collin slinking into the house holding two pizza boxes.

His gaze immediately found Jacob and then deferentially slipped to the floor with a subtle curve of submissive neck.

He was unsettled. And afraid.

Jacob could feel the chaos and fear pulsing through his entire Pack like a stuttering heartbeat. They were _afraid_ of the power that coursed through his veins if it wasn't muzzled by human dominion, and they'd all had front row seats to the fact that he'd succumbed to lupine insanity - so very much like Sam. He'd always been their unshakeable leader but - for the first time in his tenure - he'd abandoned them at a time of need. Their two newest wolves had lost their own humanity to the buckling Pack bonds with their Alpha's demise. And Jacob hadn't been there.

In fact, he hadn't even cared.

"Collin, thank you for bringing Billy," Jacob pronounced, shoring up the boy's stress with as much soothing power as he could muster. "You're free to go back to the Pack."

The boy visibly swallowed, with a subtle nod that didn't raise his eyes.

Charlie glanced between the two wolves and stepped to Collin's towering side. "Son, why don't you take those pizzas into the kitchen," he asked, cannily giving the boy's frozen feet a goal. "You can go out the back."

Collin's eyes cut up to Jacob, as he silently turned toward the kitchen - obviously wanting just another reassuring glimpse of his leader in some semblance of control.

As soon as his cub had disappeared, Jacob's shoulders bowed as his hand came up rub over his face and he turned his back on yet another one of his failures.

"How's she doin'?" his father asked as the creaking sound of his chair rolled more into the room.

"She's alright," Charlie answered as Jacob resumed his pacing sentry.

"How's _he_ doin'?" Billy murmured quietly.

Jacob pointedly didn't glance downstairs to catch whatever silent response his father got to that question.

"Jake," Charlie called curtly.

Jacob's head automatically snapped to the sound. He snatched the whizzing blur of cloth from the air even as he caught the man's wry smile. Jacob glared at him and turned on his heel, hastily pulling on the shirt. More shuffling sounds murmured from the bathroom, and he was back at the door staring through it like his glare could burn it down.

"Let's start on that pizza, Charlie," Billy's dusky voice urged meaningfully.

"Yeah, alright," Charlie sounded reluctant, but the sounds of footstep and wheel squeaked across the floorboards anyway.

The doorknob rattled and Bella's soft breaths cantered right behind the door for a moment. Jacob swallowed, forcing his feet to take a step backwards - he could _feel_ her. He knew the exact spot and how much space she filled standing behind that flimsy wooden membrane in the pull against his skin.

His wolf had been nothing but a hurricane inside him - the violence of it having beaten the his insides to a bloody numb pulp long ago - but suddenly the beast froze in intense and focused attention.

And then, she was there.

As the door swung in on its hinges, Bella's hands slipped up to wrap around her arms around herself as she pulled her lip into her mouth insecurely.

Jacob was momentarily frozen by just the sight and scent of her. His wolf tensed, it's sigh of relief a whine of longing as his eyes frantically took inventory. The man wanted to lunge forward and enfold her in his arms, but strangely instinct held him back - usually the far more impatient of the two.

She was standing small and uncertain in the doorway, her wet hair teak and bleeding moisture into the pink tie-dyed tee-shirt she wore over knit pants. Jacob couldn't even appreciate how delectably the outfit served up that little body because to every sense it was painfully clear that Bella was _hurting_.

Her skin was raw and rosy from how hard she'd scrubbed her body yet it hadn't been able to slough off the scent of anxiety and fear. Those loamy eyes were glassy and wide and her nostrils quivered with each uneven draw of breath, whispering of trauma and residual shock.

Just what the fuck had that demon done to her? It was all he could do to keep the question from bursting over his lips.

"Hey," she breathed.

Jacob licked his lips and took a slow step toward her. "Are you okay, honey?" he whispered, his eyes washing over her face, desperately looking for clues.

She nodded mutely as her eyes dipped down between them.

"Heeyyy," his croon pulled her eyes back up as he spread his arms in invitation. Her feet seemed to hesitate, but her body threw itself forward, and Jacob wrapped his arms around that tiny body and pulled her to his chest with a shaking sigh.

He melted around her, his shoulders caving and head falling down to rest on the crown of her head. She felt so good in his arms - warm, sweet, small. But she was shaking - minute tremors that were threatening to make her crumble in his arms. His hand came up to her jaw and cupped it tenderly as he placed a kiss on the top of her head.

"Bells, what'd he do?" he whispered, a quiet heat simmering under the question.

She shook her head mutely against his chest.

Frowning, he pulled back a little. When she refused his gentle insistence at her jaw, Jacob squatted down in front of her, searching for her eyes.

"I-I'm just tired… and-…" she drew in a shaking breath. "I haven't eaten all day." While certainly part of the equation, the assertions sounded like the scrabbling excuses of a brain trying to delude a shattered heart.

Jacob's brow furrowed as he smoothed his hand over her cheek, tucking her wet hair behind an ear as he took worried stock. Bella pulled that plump lower lip into her mouth as her gaze wandered to the floor as if afraid he'd see the truth in her eyes. She looked worn clear down to the bone with dark circles under her eyes and a wan, gaunt look to her face. She'd lost weight over this week.

He hadn't been taking care of her.

That condemning realization made his heart ache as his palms slipped to her shoulders and then ghosted down over her upper arms, trying to brush her clasped hands free to take them in his. She defiantly refused the gentle prompt, trying to lean into his body instead.

Jacob's entire being froze as his gaze snapped down to her hands, wrapped around her biceps… instead of her habitual middle.

And then he could see what she was trying to hide: darkening shadows spread across rosy skin from under those trembling hands.

It felt like he was trying to swallow down a burning knot of fire as his eyes snapped back up to hers.

Chin tucked, Bella was squinting up at him timorously. She was _worried_… about his reaction.

"Lemme see," he rasped, the words wrung dry and thin by a plea. He _needed_ to.

Bella bit her lip so hard it turned white as she tucked her chin further.

His dwarfing hands were shaking as they came up to cover hers and gently brush them off her abused arms. He choked on his inadvertent gasp. Two angry purple bruises - the shape and size of a man's hand - were tattooed into those delicate arms.

Rage exploded in his gut like a nuclear holocaust, sending his heart-rate skyrocketing and his breath through his teeth with a hiss. Yet he knew his face betrayed nothing. Strangely, though the very fiber of his being demanded he chase that thing down and decimate it to ash, all three parts of himself - man, Alpha and wolf - were united in overcoming the impulse. Their mate was suffering and she needed him.

She needed him calm and in control.

Retribution would come - and would come swiftly with dark savagery - but it would have to wait.

So his hand was suddenly stone-cold steady as it ghosted over the marks on each arm. "Oh, honey," he breathed, the sorrow undulating under the words as he leaned down and brushed his lips over the obscene marks. First one side, then the other, as all parts of him waged war against his rage.

That demon had _touched_ her.

It was more than he could handle. Jacob bowed his head down to her sternum and drew in reassuring lungfuls of her warm, living scent as he tried to scrape together the strength to be what she needed him to be.

"Cullen?" he wheezed, closing his eyes as he listened to her heart canter uneasily on.

"No," she whispered.

Jacob jerked his head back up finding her sloe eyes filling with tears. "James?" he breathed.

Bella swallowed, as her gaze jerked between his. Her mouth turned up funny like it was trying to smile through silent sobs. "Blond? Psycho look to the eyes?" she quavered, valiantly trying to inject humor into her grief.

Jacob did his best to help her, forcing a wan smile. "That's him."

Bella nodded, pulling that lip back into her mouth like a security blanket.

The forced flippancy dropped from his face like lead. "Anywhere else, honey?"

Bella squinted at him a moment. "My back," she whispered.

Pressing his lips together as he held her gaze, his hands gently tugged at her shoulders, begging her to turn around. Bella hesitated a moment and then complied, her eyes dropping to the floor as her shoulders hunched up to her ears.

He wrapped a comforting arm around her middle and she grasped onto it with both hands like a life raft as, with a cashmere touch, Jacob lifted the shirt. He sucked in a breath through his teeth as more bruising was immediately revealed over the base of her spine, bleeding down under the low waistband.

As he carefully pushed the shirt up higher, Jacob couldn't even appreciate that slight waist and creamy skin, because as soon as it was revealed, his eyes were locked on the abuse over her shoulder blades.

It was painfully obvious what had happened.

She'd been pinned to something rough that left scrapes over the bared skin of her shoulders and her hips had been crushed at the same time by bruising - and repetitive - strength.

Jacob's stomach rebelled and he swallowed the acid back down as one hand tenderly soothed over her injuries. He hadn't allowed his mind to venture past James finding his imprint… but he realized he'd always assumed he'd just planned death. Yet there was an entirely different kind of violence that men could inflict upon women, and it was clear that he'd intended to do just that.

To make Jacob suffer. And oh, was it fucking working like a charm.

Of course Jacob could scent that Edward must have gotten there in time, but that didn't mean the damage wasn't already done. For the first time he was _grateful_ that - no matter what his sick motives - Edward had been there.

It _should_ have been Jacob.

_How the fuck had he let this happen?_

His hands were numb as he gently pulled her shirt down and her body into his lap. Bella submitted easily, melting back against him with a hitching sigh and allowing his big body to surround her with comfort. Lowering himself to si on his heels, he blew a breath from his cheeks and rested his head at the nape of her neck.

For several silent minutes, Jacob just breathed - in and out - letting the innate power of his inheritance well up around them, bathing her in warmth and strength.

"Do you want to talk about this right now?" he whispered into her damp hair. Because sooner or later they _would_ talk about this -whether she wanted to or not. Just like she'd always done for him.

She shook her head and nestled deeper into his embrace.

Though he wanted to, he wouldn't let his own self-loathing leach out into anguished and empty apologies for the inevitable past. He knew her better than himself and she would try to comfort _him_, to take care of _him_, as she had been doing this entire week.

But now, it was Jacob's turn.

"Whatever I have to do, Bella," he murmured, the softness of his voice in contrast to the blood oath beneath the words. "I swear, he'll never get near you again."

"I know," she whispered. It was an instant response, grounded in unwavering faith.

And it both bolstered and broke Jacob's heart. She'd already forgiven him, even if he would never forgive himself. But now was not the time for self-derision.

He needed to take care of his mate.

"Let's get you some food, 'kay?" he breathed. She nodded as Jacob's arms rearranged her in his lap, one forearm slipping under her knees as he turned her more toward him. He stood fluidly with her in his arms, half-expecting her to protest, but she just nestled into him like a worn child.

His wolf purred soothingly in his chest, low and lamenting. It grieved for his mate's suffering, but now she was safe in his arms. He was never letting her go again.

Bella's hand slithered under the neckline of his shirt, searching for the comforting touch of skin as he descended the stairs with held her close to his heart.

"My dad and yours are here," he whispered, turning into her temple and placing a tender kiss. "You wanna take the food back upstairs?"

Bella tightened her arms around his neck as she pressed her face further into his shoulder and shook her head. "S'okay," she mumbled.

Jacob paced into the kitchen and the two men looked up, their murmured conversation instantly drying up into silent concern.

"Bells!" Charlie called, lunging to his feet with the scrape of his chair.

The man froze halfway up at Jacob's terse shake of his head. Charlie swallowed and sat back down as Jacob strode to the kitchen table where two pizza boxes were scattered haphazardly. Each man had a half-eaten slice of pepperoni before them which was leaching oil into the cheap paper plates.

Jacob pulled the chair at the other end of the table out with his foot, and sat down with his imprint held tightly in his arms. Her little fingers dug fervently into his skin under the shirt and she still hadn't lifted her head from where she hid. Her warm breath pulled and pushed against his skin through the shirt and grounded him under the heavy stares of their fathers.

Cradling her protectively in one dwarfing arm, his other reached out.

"This one." Charlie hastily stood and pushed one of the boxes toward him along with a paper plate. Jacob tossed open the lid and pulled a slice of mushroom pizza onto the plate and dragged it toward him.

He wiped his oily hand on his shorts and then tenderly smoothed it over her head as he tucked his chin, trying to see her face.

"So I think the boys'll be able to get that cruiser fixed up - good as new - tomorrow," Billy spoke up, as if he was continuing their conversation.

"Yeah, well they'd better," Charlie grumbled, sounding only marginally on board with Billy's heroic attempts at giving the two of them some privacy.

While the two men valiantly tried to carry on a lame casual conversation, Jacob turned all of his attention to his imprint.

"Hey," he breathed, stroking soothingly over her cheek. "They' got mushroom."

Bella heaved in a breath through his shirt, and then lifted her head. "I'm tired, Jake," she sighed heavily, looking up at him with bloodshot eyes. And pointedly avoiding the two murmuring men across the table. She was obviously rethinking her decision to be around their fathers now. "Let's just go to bed."

Jacob pursed his lips as his knuckles ghosted over that wan cheek. "Hey, eat a lil' something first, 'kay?" he whispered.

She blinked up at him and then her eyes darted uneasily toward the end of the table and two men who were judiciously trying to ignore them. Jacob leaned forward and pulled a mushroom from the oily slice of pizza and then sat back with raise to his brow.

"C'mon," he cajoled gently, rearranging her in his arm as he held up the food temptingly.

Her dubious eyes darted to his and she licked lips.

With an encouraging smile, Jacob's fingers slipped the mushroom over that delectable lower lip.

Both the room and their fathers were swallowed into inconsequential, his breath stuttering in his chest, as her warm trembling tongue swirled over his skin. Bella delicately suckled his fingertip as he slowly dragged it back out of her mouth with nothing short of wonder. He traced her lips with awe as they pulled under his touch with the sumptuous movements of her jaw.

His wolf purred deep in the folds of his being, as mesmerized as the man. It was a profoundly soulful and intimate experience to feed his imprint - even an oily mushroom off a second-rate pizza from Jojo's.

Bella seemed similarly entranced as, fathomless eyes locked with his, she chewed slowly and then swallowed with a little crinkle in the back of her throat.

The soft curve of Jacob's mouth stretched out in a smile and he leaned forward and brushed his lips over hers in a tender caress.

Oh fuck, he wanted to do that again.

He leaned forward to snatch another mushroom.

A pointed clearing of a throat had his eyes jerk up to the sight of his father watching them with soft eyes. But he tilted his head meaningfully toward his comrade-in-arms.

Jacob's gaze darted over to where Charlie was frozen, his forearms braced tensely against the table as his face was turning stop-light red.

Jacob scowled and defiantly picked at another mushroom, but he turned back to Bella watching the same scene across the table with worried eyes. With a glance up at him, she took the topping from his fingers in hers and ferried to her own mouth as she sat up more.

But even just this little bit of nourishment seemed to be making a world of difference in his mate. Eyes fixed on the food she turned in his arms as she chewed and reached out for the plate.

Jacob grabbed it first. He obstinately refused her when she tried to take it - he just couldn't abdicate this experience completely, even though the spell was effectively broken.

With a soft chuckle at his expense, Bella leaned back against his shoulder and allowed him to balance the paper plate on his palm like a table as she picked up the slice of pizza and took a nibbling bite.

For several silent minutes, Jacob watched her with rapt attention as she took miniscule bite after bite of the pizza, both the wolf and the man utterly entranced (and not giving a flying fuck if it pissed off her father or not).

"Dad," Bella finally piped up, setting the half-eaten slice back on the plate in Jacob's hand. "Do we still have any of that lemonade left?" She was obviously feeling a little better and had decided to try to negotiate a little truce in this silent war.

Jacob's gaze darted out to her father who was petulantly rearranging the pepperoni on his pizza. He glanced up, shooting a dagger Jacob's way before he met his daughter's gaze. Without a word he stood, stomping to the refrigerator with a huff.

"You're not done…" Jacob balked, leaning in and kissing her temple while her father's back was turned.

Bella nodded, pushing his hand away as she craned up and caught his withdrawing lips in hers. Jacob gasped, blindly setting the plate down. His hand came up to her jaw, but he let her lead, his lips gratefully soaking up that pizza-flavored caress of silk. Her hand came up to his neck pulling him down further with greasy fingers that slipped over his skin. Neither of them gave a damn.

Until Charlie began slamming down glasses on the counter. Bella broke the kiss, running her tongue over her lower lip absently as her gaze flitted over Jacob's face like fireflies. "Aren't you gonna eat?" she asked quietly.

He blinked several times as his thumb strummed over her jaw. "Later," he murmured.

Bella's brow furrowed, but her eyes darted out as her father approached with two glasses and a peevish frown. The symbolism didn't escape Jacob that he'd - reluctantly - brought him one too.

Charlie's mustached was bunched up over a reluctantly accepting press of lips as his gaze darted to Jacob and then slid down to his daughter, poignantly sitting in his lap.

"You okay, baby," he murmured as his weathered hand reached out to cup her cheek.

Bella nodded, pressing her lips together as her eyes fluttered closed at her father's caring touch.

"What happened tonight?" Charlie ventured, his hand slipping down to be shoved into his pocket.

Bella stiffened in Jacob's arms and he tightened them reassuringly around her.

Her father took a step back as his eyes ran cannily over her face. "Look, I know it's hard, Bells," he began. "But Jake here's gotta hear about all the details so he knows what he's up against."

The man's gazed darted up to meet Jacob's surprised eyes. Pulling him in like this was both a validating and cunning tactic - and it was also 100% true. The man was good at his job.

Bella turned over her shoulder to look at Jacob and he gave her a reassuring half-smile as he rubbed a palm over her hip.

"At work, we always try to get a statement the night-of," her father continued, drawing her gaze back. "While it's fresh."

Bella shuddered in Jacob's arms and his protective worry instantly overran any modicum of strategy. "We don't need to talk about it tonight," he quickly backtracked.

"No," she turned up to him as her hand covered his on her side. "I want to, Jake. It's just… well it was scary," she turned back to her father with the traumatized fear etched clearly into her face.

Jacob could see it lanced straight through the man's heart, but he nodded stoically.

"But I wanna talk about it, because I think there's something else going on…" she began, sitting up more in Jacob's lap and clutching onto his arms like the retraining bar of a roller coaster just edging out of the dock.

Jacob's body froze as both Alpha and man perked up to piqued attention.

"Like what?" Billy prompted as Charlie strode back to his seat and sat rigidly down.

"I think one of the Cullens is helping him," she glanced a Jacob. "Helping J-James. I think it's Edward," she turned back out to the two men as rage tried shimmy itself out in a tremor down Jacob's body. He needed to just listen, and not react.

Because not only her battered heart, but her _life_ depended on it.

Without looking at him, Bella's hand raised up behind her to mold to his cheek, soothing him with strokes of delicate fingers as he struggled to bring his innate Alpha control to bear. _Never_ was it more needed.

As she held them both together with the magic of touch, she began relating the events of the evening with precise and exacting detail, showing off that astute and observant mind.

Her quiet voice broke as she described the diner in all its horror film glory and then numbly continued on to the events that came after, carefully skirting details she wasn't ready to share. That part of her story would have to wait until they were alone sometime later. Truthfully, Jacob didn't think either he or their fathers could take it right now and keep their tenuous hold on sanity. Even though both men showed what they were made of as they kept up a stony façade even as Billy's face paled and Charlie's face darkened with rage.

Jacob learned many things as he stoically took each slicing word in his heart. He not only learned of the depths of Jame's psychosis but the breadth Edward's delirium. The parasite actually thought Bella would eventually fall in love with him and he'd get his happily ever after. (No doubt more easily accomplished if she was already one of his kind.) Bella's sharp mind had caught the fact that James had let slip both that someone had told her she was immune to thrall as well as the fact that he knew about the imprint.

Which he certainly shouldn't have. None of the leeches did.

Jacob silently agreed with her that it could only be courtesy of Edward because he could read everyone's mind except hers (he couldn't even fathom how many secrets he'd let slip with his oblivious private thoughts in their meetings).

Finally as her tale wound down to its end, her brave monotone disintegrated into soft sobs and she'd collapsed into Jacob's chest, flinging her arms around his neck as her body quivered against him, totally spent.

For minutes or hours, the room was drowned in silence, only punctured by Bella's soft gasps into his shirt while Jacob slowly stroked his hand over her head.

And inside he burned.

"Bells," Charlie's voice was husky.

Bella sniffled and turned around hesitantly.

"I'm real proud of ya kid. You kept your head - ain't many that could," he murmured, sitting up and splaying his hand on the table. "And..." his eyes darted up to Jake's for a moment. "And y'know I ain't real happy 'bout all this, but it looks like Jake's," he cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Jake's _wolf_ chose right. "

Bella guilelessly wiped her nose with her fist and glanced up at Jacob.

"I agree," he whispered. Bringing a hand to her jaw, he pressed his lips to her forehead for several heartbeats. "Love you," he murmured over her skin.

Bella drew in a breath and released it in a shaking sigh. "Thanks dad," she quavered, her eyes darting back out to her father.

Her head was wobbling on the column of her neck she was so exhausted. Jacob tenderly pulled her back to his chest. "Rest honey," he urged quietly as he rearranged her in his arms.

She didn't need to be asked twice. Bella's hand slithered back under the collar of his shirt, as she tucked her body into his and he enfolded her securely in his arms.

Charlie stood up and pulled out another slice of pepperoni pizza and put it on a plate, pushing it toward Jacob. By silent agreement, the three men wordlessly - and unenthusiastically - pushed food past their lips while Bella's breathing slowed and her body relaxed in Jacob's arms.

Jacob watched the residual stress slowly slip from Bella's face as she quickly tumbled over the precipice of exhaustion into slumber.

And peace. Finally.

Shoving the last bite of crust over his lips, he wiped his hands on his shorts and brushed her hair tenderly back from her cheek as he resituated her in his arms.

"So seems like that Cullen's tryin' to get his own sick fantasy by helpin' this James get his revenge," Billy condensed the last half hour's information into a single baleful sentence. "That's how he figured it all out so fast."

Jacob pressed his lips together as his eyes washed over his imprint. It didn't make him feel any better, but that _was_ the missing piece. James shouldn't have figured out about imprints or Bella so soon. That night Jacob had been to her room, he'd spent twenty minutes running expanding concentric circles around her house, myopically searching for the leech's scent and simultaneously masking his own trail.

"'Think Carlisle knows?" his father asked quietly.

Jacob released a thoughtful breath through his nose as he carefully replayed the last few meetings with the Cullen's leader.

He shook his head tersely.

Carlisle was an arrogant conceited prick to be sure, but he didn't have the balls for this. This stank of Edward and James - the only ones with something to gain. He wondered who had approached whom first.

Oh he fucking knew alright… Edward had seen an opportunity to both rid himself of the competition and get his bride served up as a leech and gone for the kill.

"I think we gotta keep them Cullens close for a while," Charlie's voice was nothing but low rasp.

Jacob's head jerked up.

"I know you're wantin' to kill 'em and I'm right there with yeh," he muttered darkly. "But first you gotta get this James. Them Cullens have info we can use if we play 'em right, but if you kill 'em, you're up against that psycho and runnin' blind."

"Keep your friends close," Billy agreed with a sage nod. "But your enemies closer."

"_No fucking way,"_ the words boiled in his gut with wrath.

"We gotta be _real_ smart about this son," his father set down his pizza and wiped his hands on a napkin crisply.

"We?" Jacob barked a laugh. Bella grunted quietly in her sleep and his gaze snapped down to her beautiful face as his hand soothed over her cheek.

"We," his father returned firmly, drawing Jacob's gaze back up to his glittering eyes. "You ain't doin' this alone."

"You finally gonna kick that ole' bastard Quil to the curb, old man?" Charlie chuckled, leaning back in his chair and lacing his hands behind his head.

"Maybe," Billy gave him a shrewd smile. "'Less Jake wants to step up to bat."

Jacob groaned with a roll of his eyes. There was no fucking way in _hell_ he was taking on any _more_ responsibilities.

"That'd be real good, Billy," Charlie nodded with a purse of his lips. "From where I sit that ole codger's bunglin' the play."

Jacob's gaze paced between the two men at the end of the table…. coincidentally the only two men his wolf hadn't been able to dominate. He wasn't a control freak - or he didn't used to be. But that powerful Alpha instinct that now ran through his veins _demanded_ submission, because the feral lupine aggression of his Pack _needed_ those boundaries to keep in control.

Never show weakness.

But suddenly Jacob understood: here was his Council.

The three people in this room were the only ones to whom he could trust enough to show weakness in order to garner strength. To gain guidance. To get help with a load that was simply too ponderous for one set of shoulders with so few years propping them up.

That same mercenary Alpha instinct agreed: he _needed_ them.

Jacob looked up and found his father watching him with canny eyes.

Squaring his shoulders, Jacob nodded curtly and returned his gaze to his sleeping mate.

"Why don't you take her upstairs," Charlie murmured quietly.

"I'm staying tonight," Jacob rasped, snapping his head up with challenging eyes.

"You sure the hell are!" the man bit back.

Jacob blinked in surprise.

"On the _couch_."

His face darkened into a glower as he stood abruptly with the scrape of his chair that masked his low rumbling growl.

"Charlie," he father chuckled with a shake of his head.

Jacob whipped around as his eyes fell down to the woman in his arms. He didn't think he could do it - scratch that, _knew_ he couldn't. And neither could she if the way she clung to him in her sleep was any indication.

_Fuck, what was Charlie going to do anyway? Drag him out of her room? Good luck with that._

As Jacob stalked into the living room, whatever silent conversation was going on behind him erupted in a heavy sigh from her father.

"Jake?" Charlie called from the kitchen. "Jus'… just leave the door open."

Jacob sniffed a laugh as he took the stairs two at a time. He could live with that.

For now.

'

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'

_Review if you like. _

_(and want me to keep writing, because the next chapter's the one you've been waiting for *wink*)_


	14. Fumbling Towards Ecstasy

_Before we get started I want to call your attention to my __favorite image of all time__ created by the ultimate sand(wo)man __**Nikitajuice**__ (dealing in the stuff dreams are made of). This scene was written long ago in my head, but this image inspired a little twist and has insinuated itself into this prose as much as it has my dreams: _

_nikitajuiceDOTtumblrDOTcom /post/33871715180/you-want-tall-ill-give-you-tall-digital_

'

_Sorry, this chapter is a ridiculously long - kinda more like a short story in itself. To those of you wanting more Jacob/Bella time, I now present to you 20k of nothing but (and probably way more than you ever wanted, lol). I simply took dictation from the muse for this chapter with no attempt at pith or discipline._

_I'd love it if you grabbed a cup of tea and chilled as you read it. Those of you who want to skim for what you expect may __or may not__ happen in this little episode will miss most of the pivotal character development and points to be made. But, of course, I gift this to you to do as you will._

_Thanks to Tayjayfan for her emotional support. And thanks to Sarah Mclaughlan for the title and opening lyrics._

_As always, thanks for reading and hope you enjoy._

'

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**Chapter 14 - Fumbling Towards Ecstasy**

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'

All the fear has left me now  
I'm not frightened anymore.

It's my heart that pounds beneath my flesh.  
It's my mouth that pushes out this breath

And if I shed a tear I won't cage it.  
I won't fear love  
And if I feel a rage I won't deny it.  
I won't fear love.

Companion to our demons  
They will dance and we will play.  
With chairs candles and clothes  
Making darkness in the day.  
It will be easy to look in or out  
Upstream or down  
Without a thought

Peace in the struggle to find peace.  
Comfort on the way to comfort

And if I shed a tear I won't cage it.  
I won't fear love  
And if I feel a rage I won't deny it.  
I won't fear love.

'

* * *

'

_Sheltered._

_Snug._

_Warm._

_Freaking bright._

With a petulant groan, Bella squeezed her her eyes tighter against that prickling light and curled more onto her side and into that comforting heat.

"Mmm," she hummed as she pressed her face more into a wall of warm cotton. Strong, musky-sweet, safe, she could stay here forever.

The heaviness resting on her side moved, smoothing over her shoulder on its way to brush the hair from her cheek.

A calloused caring _hand_.

Bella's eyes popped open, blinking blearily at the undeniable nipple pressing against a shirt in a sultry stare. With a soft intake of breath, she pulled back, searching for it's owner.

_Jacob_.

He was lying on his side beside her with his head propped on his hand, watching her with hematite eyes.

Her lips fumbled with a novocaine smile. "Hey," she sighed, diving back into that solacing chest and pressing her face against his sternum. His heartbeat, low and steady, thrummed against her nose.

"Mwat time izit?" she mumbled into his shirt.

"It's only eight," Jacob murmured as that big hand rubbed slowly over her shoulder. "Go back to sleep."

Even drowsy, Bella could hear the heaviness that dragged that bass down.

Pulling back with the whispering rustle of sheets, Bella squinted at him through the harsh light of an unusually sunny morning.

He stared back at her with unfathomable eyes. _Something wasn't right _- he looked exhausted... and sad.

Her brow furrowed in confusion as her hand slithered up from under the heavy covers to rub over her face, trying to push some sentience into her muddled brain. Her eyes darted back to him as he continued to watch her from behind a worn wooden mask.

"Hey," she whispered, her hand shimmying up between them in the tight space to rest over his heart. "What's wrong?"

Jacob was lying pointedly on top of the sheets- as much a barrier between them as that hard, stoic mask. He wordlessly shook his head.

With a soft huff, Bella squeezed bleary eyes closed as she rolled away from him and onto her back. The shooting pain from tender bruises, made her suck a breath through her teeth.

_Oh yeah... that._

Memories flooded her mind like shadowy nightmares and the blessing that she was actually waking up at all stung poignantly behind her eyes. Finally, the anomaly of waking up to him in any context hit her. With a gasp, her gaze cut back to the man lying beside her; those deep set eyes were now closed dolefully and his lips pressed into a thin line.

Bella arched her body as she gingerly resituated herself and pulled the covers up tighter around her neck.

"Jake?" Bella whispered, it was nothing short of a plea for the return of those eyes.

Jacob rolled his lips once and then let them pop free back into their sensual fullness as his eyes blinked dutifully open like the lids weighed a million pounds. "How're you feeling?" he whispered.

"I'm fine," she mumbled absently.

She took worried stock as she licked her lips, desperately trying rouse herself to the situation. Now she could see it clearly: an aching fatigue was etched into his face... and self-loathing. "Did you get any sleep?" she ventured softly.

"Bella, _don't,_" he groaned, squeezing his eyes closed again. That heavy hand at her waist immediately fled to his own side, palpably pulling away.

"Don't what?" she challenged quietly as she hauled herself stiffly back onto her side.

"It's not about me," he rasped, his gaze returning wearily to her own.

Bella propped her own cheek on her hand, mirroring his position, as her attention flitted over the suffering that darkened under his eyes and made the stubbled shadow over his jaw look haggard.

"Yeah," she agreed. "I thought this was about _us_... and I slept better than I have all week," she sniffed - surprised to find it was 110% true. "But _you _look exhausted," she murmured sadly. Her hand slipped from under the sheets, reaching up to tenderly stroke his cheek.

But in his most unguarded reaction this morning, as the sheets fell away Jacob's eyes snapped down to her arm as his breath hissed over his lips. Bella froze, her own gaze automatically following his stare. Bruises always looked worse the next day on her pale skin, but that was a gross understatement today (with gross being the operative word). The crisp bruised handprints of last night had spread into dark ugly shadows over her entire upper arm.

Grimacing, Bella tried to pull the covers back over them. "It looks worse than it is," she mumbled.

But gentle fingers stilled her own, brushing them away along with the sheets. As soon as he touched her skin, she felt a tremor awaken in his hand. Like shockwaves, the quake rolled up his arm, burrowing into his body and making the muscles quiver in his chest.

Following the path of destruction, Bella's looked up to where Jacob's eyes were locked singularly on her arm. He bit his lip as he watched his own hand brush over the bruise so lightly it felt like a sigh. His face was that same unnerving and impassive mask, but as she watched, that obsidian gaze began to hemorrhage. Like a deep-drill well, sorrow bubbled up and pooled in liquid lament. The vulnerability of tears was shocking in context of that strength.

"Jake," Bella worried, as she propped herself up more on her elbow and reached out to the anguish harshening the lines of his face.

He didn't even look at her; Jacob shook his head slowly back and forth. "I'm so sorry," he whispered as those silent tears tried to flee, a single droplet condensing on straight ebony lashes.

Bella's fingers reached up to catch it.

With those preternatural reflexes, he was suddenly turning away, somehow extricating himself so seamlessly it was like he'd evaporated. His legs swung over the side of the bed as he braced his elbows on his thighs and hung his head.

"Honey," Bella soothed, sitting up more as her worried gaze washed over that broad back now turned pointedly on her.

An incriminatingly juicy snuffle heralded his hand brusquely slapping over his face and it simply shattered her heart. To see the tough, impervious man he'd become crumble right in front of her was heartbreaking … and frightening. He'd been under immense pressure over this last year and last night had simply been the last straw to break that strong back.

"Hey," she murmured reaching her hand out to his bulky shoulder.

He lurched from under her touch, as he jerked his face away, yanking a harsh sniffle along with him.

Bella's hand snapped back like she'd been burned. It felt like she had. She knew his emotions were churning inside him so fiercely that he simply didn't know what to do with it all, but the rejection still hurt. _Physically_.

She brought both hands up to rub her temples, pressing her pinkies over her eyes for a moment. Bella had no idea where to start to fix this.

Letting her hands fall heavily into her lap, she drew in a resetting breath as her gaze absently panned her room. Outside, an insultingly bright morning was gearing up and spilling through her window and over the chaos of a week's despair. Forks' usual clouds had moved indoors.

With a final glance at the man hunched over his suffering on the edge of her bed, Bella patted her thighs and pulled herself off the other side, throwing the sheets out of the way.

Her bare feet were just touching the floorboards when suddenly there was a 6'7" man beside her wearing a stricken expression while he reached hand down to cup her elbow and help her up. Or hold her fast- she couldn't be sure.

"Where're you going?" he rasped.

Bella smiled sadly up at him as she stood, her other hand covering his tenderly on her forearm. "I gotta pee," she squinted up at him.

Jacob blinked once, like it took a moment for the words to filter through that uncharacteristic panic to understanding.

Squeezing his hand reassuringly, she extricated herself from his grip and tromped toward the bathroom directly across the hall. Her bedroom door had been left open - at her father's insistence, no doubt. Truthfully she was surprised he'd let Jake stay the night in her bedroom at all, although thinking back on the broken desperation in his eyes last night she doubted her father had had much of a choice.

She turned to close the bathroom door behind her and her breath snapped with surprise into her lungs at the broad chest inches away ...and not-so-coincidentally blocking the door. Courtesy of that preternaturally silent step, he was right behind her.

She shouldn't be surprised.

Bella's eyes trailed up over the that quivering chest to eyes now glittering with sparks of yellow and overstated anxiety. Bella pulled a corner of her lip into her mouth; he wasn't fully in control of himself, but she knew enough about that lupine protective streak by now to understand. Last night had frayed his nerves raw and ragged - the thought of her being out of his sight distressed his wolf.

"Hey, I'm just gonna be a minute," she soothed while her hand grasped the doorknob and hoped he didn't make her leave it open.

Jacob's Adam's apple bobbed once as those iridescent eyes darted between hers. She could _see _that silent war of wills.

Without a word, he took a step back.

She offered him an encouraging smile and then slowly closed the door. Bella blew a breath out from her cheeks as she leaned her forehead against the cool wood. It was strange; truthfully it kind of stressed her out too to have a door between them. And maybe it was her imagination, but she could _feel _the precise space where his bulky frame loomed right behind the wooden membrane between them.

Picking her head up off the door, she blinked and cracked it back open curiously. Yep, she was right: he was standing just outside the bathroom with distress slathered over his face. His head tipped minutely to peer at her through the small space.

Tender exasperation escaped in a sigh as Bella opened the door a little more. "C'mon, Jake," she groaned with a little smile - she'd try her old standby: humor. "I know you can probably hear me pee from down the block, but can't you just _pretend _you're not listening?"

A little human sentience blinked into those struggling eyes.

Bella raised an encouraging brow. "I'll be quick. Promise."

His hand came up to slap over his face, rubbing briskly. "Sorry," he mumbled into his palm.

"S'alright," Bella murmured, her face falling back into furrowed concern. It broke her heart to see him teetering so obviously on the crumbling edge. And worried her to death.

With a sigh, his hand fell from his face and he met her gaze with eyes that had thankfully darkened back to ebony. He took a step back that looked like he was pushing into tornado-force winds.

Then another.

And another.

Eyes locked with hers, Jacob backed into her bedroom and sat stiffly down on the edge of the mattress at rigid attention.

Bella nodded to really nothing in particular and closed the door quietly on that suffering. Her own surged up along with the hum of the fan as she flicked the light on.

It should seem smothering - or at least weird - to have to negotiate a free moment to herself for bodily functions, but it... wasn't. In the solitude of the bathroom, a dark anxious dread was prickling in her chest. She could also feel the bond stretched between them like a bungee cord to its breaking point. Jacob was already there.

To his breaking point.

It had only been week since he'd imprinted, but obviously that was already too long; with the trauma of the last few days, Jacob was unequivocally losing it.

The problem was, so was she.

Heaving a heavy sigh through her nose, Bella yanked on the sink faucet. With a grimace at her disheveled self in the mirror, she cupped water in her hands and splashed it over her face. The cold was sobering. As was the road before her.

So much was broken.

And that included herself. As water dribbled into the basin from her face, Bella squinted back at her reflection. Jacob's palpable torment had compulsively distracted her, but alone in her sterile bathroom, she could feel the little painful fissures caused by yesterday's blunt force trauma that made her now feel decidedly insecure and frightened. Without warning, the reality of what Jacob had tried to tell her about enemies and imprints had reared its ugly head.

And in one evening, Bella had learned that valor and bravery were concepts that were much more appealing in the abstract.

This wasn't some childish fairy tale, this was real life in all it's cruel and violent glory. Bella stood on her tiptoes as she pushed up her sleeve with wet hand. That truth had been branded into her skin. A shudder shimmied up her spine, as she closed her eyes on the memory of those cold hands and hard body pushing her up against the alley wall. In the light of day, it didn't even seem real - but the hiccup in her heartbeat at the just the mere passing memory told her that it was.

Bella swallowed thickly as she leaned against the sink and hung her head. In life there were always those single moments - forks in the road that would drastically change one's destination. She'd had several of those in her short time on the earth (most of them actually occurring in the last week): choices between bitterness and faith, trust and hopelessness, fear and love.

Weakness and strength.

Truthfully in their lifelong friendship, Bella had always thought _Jacob _was the stronger one. Whether that was true or just immature self-deprecation, she couldn't afford to hide behind that excuse now. Because right now, Jacob was broken and unbalanced and _Bella _was going to have to choose to be the strong one. Or both of them could irreparably fall.

It scared her to death.

But here is where the rubber met the road; if she was _really _going to do this thing with him, she had to accept all the crazy with the crazy-wonderful. She had to step up and into her own power - like Emily had done with Sam - and not just stand by like some damsel in distress waiting for her knight to swoop her up when the road got rough.

The flash of insight hit her in the gut like a punch and she gripped the formica under her hands as she slowly lifted her face up to the mirror. She stared into those wide haunted eyes as her mind spun on, dragging her with it along a path that was somehow burned into the fabric of her being: she had a duty too. An important one. To Jacob _and a _whole tribe and Pack of people whose lives depended on him.

Suddenly Bella truly understood _just what it meant _to be an Alpha's mate.

She was the only one who could bring him back and urge him on when all the insane pressure and competing priorities just got too much to handle for even those broad, stalwart shoulders. And sometimes that meant she'd need to face the innately tenuous and imperfect control that was all part and parcel of nearly omnipotent power.

And be _just as strong_... in her own way.

She didn't know if she could do it.

Jacob couldn't.

He just... _couldn't_.

For the first time since his muscles had ripped over his cracking bones and he'd been thrown into the firestorm of his duty as leader, Jacob was _doubting _himself. He'd stridently forbidden such a luxury over the last year. But after yesterday, it had grown up inside him like a cancer, adding rot to the torment that ate at his very soul.

He'd failed her.

He'd failed them all.

And Jacob didn't know if he had the strength anymore to pick himself up and get back into the saddle. All night while he'd myopically followed every last breath and heartbeat of his imprint beside him, he'd had a front-row seat to his Pack's demise.

Without their leader it was pure chaos. Turmoil. Bedlam stirred by the terror of both bearing witness to Jacob's loss of control and subsequent abandonment. Jared was _trying _to hold them together but he wasn't a born leader - like the quarterback he'd been, he was better at executing a coach's play. That veneer was peeling back and Paul's natural respect for his human success was waning fast leaving him snapping at every opportunity - torn between vying for control and resenting his lack of containment. Leah and Seth had finally been coaxed back to human bodies but were reeling from not only the loss of their humanity and life as they'd known it, but the loss of their father too. The siblings' unbalance ate at Sam and Emily's fledgling peace like acid and pushed Sam just a little closer toward the abyss he'd clawed his way out of. And the rest of them just withdrew into whatever personality defects got them by in the worst of times: Embry withdrew into depression, Quil abdicated any IQ whatsoever and the two cubs just sat in the corner with wide traumatized eyes.

The routine of patrols were the only thing that kept them going. But whenever any of them were phased, their minds were churning - with confusion, instability and covert pleas.

For Jacob.

He was the glue that held them all together... but how could he do that when he himself was falling apart?

While his Pack's suffering definitively broke the part of him that was Alpha and pounded failure through his heart like a nail, shamefully it was at the moment only the toxic icing on this poison cake.

He was focused on only one thing only at the moment.

As he myopically counted Bella's heartbeats and manically cataloged each sound whispering from behind that bathroom door, Jacob struggled with the burning mandate simply bash it down.

He _needed _her. Just her - to cage her in his arms, infuse her skin with his scent and never let her go.

That mandate was burning him alive and taking every last ounce of strength and control to resist. And he could feel his tenuous hold slipping like gravel beneath him.

He just couldn't bear to see the marks on her skin. His wolf was spiraling in an increasingly frenetic tailspin, it's thoughts and instinct whittled down to the feral quick:

Kill.

Protect.

Fuck.

Baring his teeth in self-disgust, Jacob raked his nails up his thigh, pushing the long shorts up ahead of them and watching the red gouges heal before his eyes.

He did it again. And again.

He was so totally fucked up right now, it was kind of comforting to have to have the outside match. The Alpha in him was railing with violent shame, trying to beat the world into submission, the wolf was hamstrung by dark lascivious instinct and the man was so broken and weary that he was slipping under the black bubbling tar of depression. Some fucking leader he was.

So _this _is how "great men" fell.

Hard.

Jacob stilled his clawing hands on his thighs and hung his head.

Bella flicked off the light switch and stood in the dark silent bathroom for several moments. Drawing in a fortifying breath, she fisted the towel in her hand like a security blanket and opened the door.

Jacob's head jerked up from where he was hunched on the edge of her bed, bloodshot eyes locking on her like she was a magnet .

His face was that same stoic mask - that truthfully frightened her - but _those eyes_. They were midnight windows down to a soul that burned.

Bella's resolve stuttered with her heart in her chest and her arms wrapped uncertainly around her middle, pressing comforting terrycloth against her stomach.

But she had to be better than this. For him.

Lifting her chin, she resisted the impulse to pull at her lip with nervous teeth and took a step toward him, forcing her hands back to careless as she blithely lifted the towel to dry the dripping ends of her long loose hair.

But it was only a ruse.

Every sense felt heightened like she'd drank a ton of caffeine on an empty stomach after a sleepless night. Each shape and line looked crisp and jumped with each step across the chasm between them on feet that really wanted to falter. But - as hyper-aware as she was - she also immediately noticed the palpable emptiness of the house. Her father was always up by six but the radio wasn't mumbling from the kitchen. It was as good a place to begin as any.

She let the towel fall to her side and licked her lips nervously. "Where's Charlie?" she whispered.

Those piercing eyes blinked soundly like a thunderclap. "Rez," he rasped, sounding like pushing that single English word past his lips was monumental. "Billy's takin' the Council."

Bella's eyebrows shot up as her feet finally stumbled to a halt.

Gathering herself in a single heartbeat, she simply nodded once though her mind spun on ahead. _This _was progress, at least. Both Jacob and the Pack needed someone on their side - someone who could offer age-earned wisdom _without _the ego-driven greed. But she couldn't believe her father had left them alone.

Right now, Bella was kinda wishing he hadn't.

As she continued her slow approach, trying to infuse each step with fraudulent calm, Jacob straightened more on the edge of the bed as he silently held her gaze.

She stopped a foot from him as her eyes flitted over that taut body. Some instinct pulled them to his knees.

Bella caged her gasp behind courageous lips. His clawed hands were frozen over his thighs, crimson half-moons welling up around each nail. Gruesome red trails like fingerpaint over smooth skin, disappeared under the dark knit of his shorts.

He was literally tearing himself apart.

Her eyes snapped back up to his - there was a tempest tumbling behind his eyes like sneakers in a dryer.

For several seconds they just stared at each other.

Bella's heart was hemorrhaging but it was pooling in warm salty courage and resolve in her gut. She couldn't let this happen to him. She _wouldn't_.

"Jake.." she began quietly, reaching out a hand.

He flinched, jerking back, and Bella froze.

Her eyes darted between his, trying to read him. He looked worried... _afraid_. Tipping her head to the side, she let her eyes wash over his face, looking for clues. His muscles were trembling, his body leaning away - as if he were braced against a door behind which railed a monster.

Right now in the solitude of the house, there were no rules or boundaries to prop up ragged restraint. She could viscerally feel the press of that frustrated dominion combusting under his frayed and popping seams. Her eyes flitted back up to his. He didn't trust himself right now... so Bella needed pick up the slack and show him that _she _did. Even when he was falling apart, she had faith in him.

But to do so, she also had to have faith in herself. She acted on instinct...

Without a word, Bella lowered her gaze and slithered to the floor in front of him, reaching out to one of those abused thighs.

The unexpected move took him by surprise, giving her just enough time to bridge the distance with touch.

She heard his soft intake of breath as her palm slipped over his knee. She ignored it as, slowly, she pulled herself forward, and her eyes darted over the glistening wake of wounds. As if in slow motion, she brought the towel up with her other hand and - keeping the soothing tether of touch with her palm - mopped the blood from skin that had already healed to smooth perfection. Carefully avoiding his gaze, Bella repeated her ministrations on the other thigh.

Dropping the towel between his feet, she leaned her cheek down on the hand resting on his knee and closed her eyes.

Instinct was such a powerful thing, now she understood. Without realizing it she had instantly changed the power dynamic between them - her innately submissive position had awakened that protective instinct and given him focus. She viscerally felt the softening of his energy as his body relaxed under her and a trembling hand ghosted over her head.

A sad smile curved her lips as she blindly brought her other hand up to rub over nothing but dents now in his thigh, reading the braille of his pain.

"Don't do this to yourself, Jake," she whispered cryptically.

His hand stilled wearily on her hair.

Bella's eyes fluttered open and she shifted her cheek on her knuckles to look up at his face. His expression was complex... conflicted. But it showed actual emotion and that was a definite improvement.

Bella wordlessly held his gaze as her hand switched trajectory to soothe down his calf.

And she waited. Something she did very well.

While her fingertips played absently with the silky masculine hairs on his leg, she watched the minute expressions play across his face as words and thoughts rallied behind those rolling lips.

Finally she heard the squirting swallow that prefaced the parting of russet lips. "I wanna know what he did to you," he choked.

Bella's eyes closed with a sigh. This was precisely the _wrong direction._ Her eyes slowly blinked back open as she lifted her cheek from her hand and sat up more, rearranging herself on her knees.

"Jacob, I'm not going to talk about this right now," she said quietly... firmly. "There's too much stuff broken. We have to fix _us _first."

His brow crumpled as his hand slithered away from the nape of her neck to rest on his thigh.

"Did my dad say how long?" she tried a quick switch of trajectory to tug that burgeoning belligerence off track.

Jacob released a heavy sigh. "He said to call when you got up," he glanced at her nightstand. Bella followed his gaze to find her bag propped against it and her phone plugged into its charger. "Emb brought it when he came to pick up the cruiser this morning," he mumbled.

Bella turned back to him with a sly smile. "I don't need to call him yet."

"Just call him," Jacob sighed, rubbing his face brusquely with his palms and then leaning back on bracing hands.

Bella's eyes flicked up to the ceiling. "No freaking way," she muttered. "He's _giving _us this time, Jake," she pressed. "Telling himself I'm gonna sleep til noon."

Hooded eyes met hers and that face calcified back into an unreadable mask.

"Plausible deniability," she arched a humorous brow, desperately trying to pull him back.

"Bella, I'm so-..." he sat up as his hands fisted into his hair, subtly scooting back further on the bed. He was still running away... from her.

"I'm so, so …. _**so **_fucked up right now... I -..." his words evaporated into a strangled huff.

Bella pushed up to her feet and sat beside him on the bed as her gaze ran worriedly over his profile. With a hiss, Jacob collapsed over his thighs, holding his head in his hands while Bella tried to figure out what the hell to do.

"I just can't get it out of my head... I-.." he choked brokenly. "It's making my wolf fucking nuts..." his forearms fell over his knees as he turned to her with torment etched into his face. "I could hurt you."

Oddly it was the dried pizza sauce smeared over the side of his neck from her fingers last night that gave her the idea. That, and Embry's comment last night.

"Can you still smell it?" she asked quietly, with a thoughtful pucker between her brow.

Jacob blinked several times.

"Leech?" she clarified.

"It's fucking burned into my brain," he growled, as his hands once again slapped up to his face.

"Oh my God!" Bella burst to her feet, all the little pieces clicking together. On top of all the crazy-making events he was having to deal with _that_? No wonder he was half out of his mind. "Take a shower!" she commanded, her hands finding her hips.

At her tone, Jacob's face snapped up, his eyes instantly hardened by hair trigger testosterone.

She quickly softened her approach as her hands slipped down from her hips. "I mean, you've still got pizza on your neck and stinking like vampire can't be helping things any, right?" she gave him a Cheshire cat grin as she took a step closer. "You've even got leaves and crap in your hair," she chuckled softly, reaching out and pulling a piece of hay from his messy ebony spikes. She flicked it away but sneakily returned to rake her fingernails over his scalp.

The reaction was instantaneous: those squared shoulders softened and his eyelids fluttered closed. Bella stepped closer between his knees and repeated the motion with both hands as that cagey tension palpably melted and a subtle rumbling rose in his chest.

"C'mon Jake," she murmured, tipping her head and watching how the hard lines of his face slowly slipped lax. But he wasn't the only one affected; his scent billowed up from the warmth of his scalp, relaxing her in a heady and undeniably chemical reaction. He didn't stink to her - not at all. Even unshowered he smelled deliciously earthy with a spicy virile tang that did crazy things to her stomach.

With a dreamy smile she leaned in and pressed her lips to his forehead. "Lemme take care of you," she whispered against his hairline.

"I should be taking care of you," he slurred, sounding as drunk as she was feeling at the moment.

"You are," she murmured through her smile. "By taking a shower."

Jacob's face tipped up with a surprisingly earnest expression glistening in his eyes. It was then that Bella really understood just how little human sentience he had at the moment - he didn't seem to realize she was so obviously playing him at all.

All things considered, it was certainly an underhanded tactic... but, hey, whatever worked. Right now Bella was all about results.

"I mean have you seen my sheets?" she quirked a tender brow at that vulnerable stare.

Jacob turned over his shoulder and glanced at the knotted mess. She hadn't changed her sheets or made her bed since the day before and there were now two Jacob-visits worth of detritus sprinkled in with 400-count cotton.

He turned back to her with a grimace.

"And you _know _how OCD I am," she smirked, slipping her hands down to rest on his shoulders.

That actually coaxed a little involuntary smile - Bella didn't know whether to be grateful or offended. Heck, grateful all the way. Whatever worked.

"Take a shower honey - you'll feel better," she continued in an encouraging croon as she rubbed her hands absently over his rock-hard shoulders. "We'll talk after, promise."

At that tempting caveat, his body twitched and a little more sentience seemed to bleed into his face. He nodded once.

Her assessing eyes darted between his for a moment, and then she patted his shoulders. Turning away, she immediately started stripping her bed. The OCD thing was only partially a joke -she'd just been too tired yesterday morning to change them.

Out of the corner of her eye, she watched Jacob push tiredly up to his towering height and roll his shoulders. With that silent liquid gait he slunk to the other side of the bed and started pulling up sheets, _helping _her.

Surprised, Bella looked up to find him watching her with intense dark eyes and her breath caught in her throat. She'd had a week to get used to the way that he changed, but still, every once in awhile - like now - the pure awe of it took her breath away.

Even so obviously struggling and worn, his face was still an undeniable work of art. The deep wide-set eyes he'd always had but were now even more pronounced under that heavy brow, making him look at once fierce and regal, yet sensitive. He'd grown into that broad nose and now it was the perfect counterbalance to high cheekbones and striking athletic chisel. Yet still that strong chin and angular jaw housed full sensual lips that should have now seemed out of place - especially trimmed by a rugged shadow of stubble - but somehow they just made that masculine power look kissable.

Jacob's hands stilled on the sheets as a furrow appeared between his brows and his gaze did a circuit of her face, obviously trying to read her.

Bella blinked back into the moment and dropped her eyes to the sheets, covering up her embarrassment with deflection. "Thanks," she mumbled, pulling the covers across the bed and balling them up against her chest.

Apparently _that _part of the imprint was undaunted, even with his palpable pain and her heartsick worry. Bella pulled her lip into mouth and strode toward the ajar closet. Kicking it open she dumped the sheets into the hamper and then closed the door, turning back around as she rubbed her hands absently on her hips.

Jacob was standing in the same position on the other side of the bed in her puny room looking huge... and lost.

"Lemme get you some towels," she offered him with a small smile and crossed back toward the hall. Just doing that one little task of stripping the bed was making her feel immensely more sane. When things got confusing or overwhelming, Bella needed to get busy.

She pulled open the linen closet in the hall and fished out two fresh snow white towels and peeked around door. Jacob was - of course - standing right there.

"Here you go," she murmured, offering them up with a reassuring smile.

Jacob's gaze dropped to the towels as he pulled them into his chest. Their hands brushed and it sent a tingling zing up her arm... but Bella barely noticed because his hands were so noticeably tremoring. Her eyes darted up questioningly to his face but he refused to meet her eyes.

Pursing her lips, she turned back to the closet and gathered the new cream sheet set she'd bought in Arizona.

"Why didn't you rinse off last night, huh Jake?" she asked carefully, pulling the sheets into her arms. His silence confirmed her hypothesis.

Stepping back she nudged the door with her foot and closed it with her shoulder looking up at the struggling man peering down at her from under his lashes. Dwarfing the hallway with his towels clutched uncomfortably against that ridiculously bulky chest, he was nothing short of pitiful.

"I-.." he began, but the words stalled on his tongue.

"Wolf thing?" Bella ventured quietly.

He nodded, closing his eyes with a heavy sigh. "I can't let you out of my sight, Bells," he rasped. "Not right now."

Bella blinked as she processed; it was so very much like what Emily had described that she was worried. _But Sam was getting better so Jacob could too, _she reminded herself. Bella drew in a steeling breath and forced her anxiety out in a long slow exhale. They were both so battered.

"I'll be right across the hall," Bella whispered, reaching out a hand to that quivering muscular forearm and waiting.

He finally met her gaze with an imperceptible nod.

Pressing her lips together, Bella shimmied past him back to her bedroom. She just needed to keep moving - and something in her told her she needed to keep him moving too.

"I'm leaving the door open."

Bella's feet faltered just inside her room and her head jerked unthinkingly over her shoulder. Jacob was standing stiffly just inside the bathroom with his back to her and head bowed. Her stomach had dropped clear down to her toes - she was pretty sure - but still there didn't seem to be enough room in her ribcage for her pounding heart.

"Kay," she squeaked, pulling her shoulders up to her ears as she turned back to the stripped bed.

Those five simple words had ignited every nerve like detonating cord. She crossed slowly to the bed as her mind stumbled and staggered, trying to find purchase on such provocative shores.

The shower whispered on and she stopped at the edge of the mattress and absently dropped the sheets.

Every cell in her body _begged _her to turn around.

_Crap. She wanted to soooo badly._

But hey, there was nothing wrong with that, was there? She was his _imprint_.

But somehow it just felt _wrong _to just shamelessly oggle him when he was so vulnerable and struggling...

"Bella?"

With a gasp - and not a thought in the world - she jerked around.

Jacob had both hands fisted in the back of his shirt and he was frowning at her from under a bulky arm.

"Breathe, honey." Her expression must have been pretty funny, because a tiny wry smile flickered over that frown.

Heat rushed to her cheeks as she jerked her chin in a nod, dutifully inhaling a breath into her (indeed) starving lungs.

He turned back around and finished pulling his shirt off in that way that men did from the back and that she'd always found so sexy. He dropped it casually to the floor as he straightened, the muscles flexing with coordinated grace across broad impressive shoulders.

Bella simply couldn't look away. She just _couldn't_.

His hands came up to his shorts and hooked under the waistband, pausing just for a moment...and then promptly shucked them down over a more delectable behind than Bella could have ever dreamed of (and she had certainly given it a try ever since she'd seen those low-slung jeans peeking out from under the hood of her truck that first day). Jacob slipped out of the pants with fluent efficiency and then kicked them to the side.

With a little gasp, Bella's knees pretty much gave out, and she collapsed on the edge of the bed.

He was …

He was...

Jacob was freaking magnificent (to put it mildly).

And he definitely knew he was putting on a show because he raised his arms up to brace his fingers against the ceiling, arching his back into the stretch and excising every last muscle down that sleek powerful form. From his broad shoulders sweeping into narrow hips, down thick thighs to long sinewy calves, the musculature shuddered and bunched under his smooth toffee skin. Only that dented butt was a shade lighter making it all the more tempting to pinch.

With a grunt, Jacob lowered his arms and raked open the shower curtain, stepping inside. He jerked it back in place behind him with barely a backward glance, but Bella could have sworn she'd seen the wan ghost of one of his cocky smiles.

But holy crap, he could be as cocky as he wanted when he looked like _that_. Frankly, it was pretty intimidating. Her body was acceptable, she supposed - she was well proportioned, if not on the skinny side (except for her bubble-butt) - but she didn't have the curves or cleavage of someone like Lauren or the popular girls at school.

Bella rubbed her hands on her face with a huff. She couldn't afford to slip into childish insecurity... not right now. This wasn't high school anymore (even if it technically was). There were so many other things that were more important than vanity: monsters and magic, duty and honor, council combat and supernatural wars. But most important of all was that Jacob needed her right now and she had to be strong.

Patting her thighs, she stood with purpose. All the blood that hadn't rushed to her face had apparently pooled between her thighs and she adjusted her yoga pants with a little shimmy. She was starting to devise a little strategy.

She started making the bed while making plans at the same time - this may well be her only chance. She could feel him trying to pull away so he could crumble in privacy. Bella wouldn't let him.

However, the little scheme she was coming up with was so freaking out of her comfort zone that it wasn't even funny, but - all things considered - it just might be her only chance at fishing them both out of this sucking undertow.

Could she do it?

Her heart did a little flip in her chest and she glanced over her shoulder at the inky spikes poking up over the shower curtain as he dipped his face down into the spray.

Jacob turned around and tried to let the water wash the burdens from his shoulders. The warm sluice _did _soothe muscles that were burning from the effort it took to hold this form.

Honestly with the first splash of redemptive water over his face, the fires of insanity had started to sizzle and he'd realized just how right Bella had been. As the residual scent of last night's tears and that sickening miasma were washed away, his wolf's straining against his buckling tether had started slackening. He should have understood that, like an allergic reaction, his instinct was suffering from what amounted to anaphylactic shock on top of everything else. But like a partier can't see just how drunk he was the night before until the hangover in the morning, Jacob had been blind.

He'd _thought _he was in some semblance of control. He'd been lulled into that illusion in the wreckage of yesterday, sitting at her kitchen table with her in his arms and their fathers offering their unspoken - if not grudging - acceptance. But as the night wore on and he watched the unraveling of his abandoned Pack in the tormented recesses of his mind, he'd also been watching his own demise.

Bella had seen it.

In one morning, she'd fluently fished him out of insanity, giving him direction and managing that berserker instinct until he was standing here in her bathtub, washing away grime, impulse and memories and simply catching a blessed breath.

Squeegeeing the water from his face, he glanced over the shower rod for the 50th time in the last few minutes to see her smoothing wrinkles from the fitted sheet with that endearing neuroticism. As she straightened, she glanced up at him and that flush to her cheeks deepened, sending a jolt straight to his dick. With a lovely little smile - that was sexy as fucking hell - she dropped her gaze before she pulled that plump lower lip into her mouth as she turned to grab the pillow case from the nightstand.

He hadn't flicked on the light (or the fan) and he could scent her residual arousal from here. He'd known she'd been watching him undress (secretly wanted it) and his sick wolf had veritably preened under the honeyed scent of her appreciation.

And that was just going to be another fucking minefield to navigate. Last night he'd all but convinced himself that he was going to let her go. Their legends proclaimed that imprints had a choice (so therefore didn't a wolf?) and there _had _to be some way of breaking this thing.

But except for Taha Aki, a wolf had never survived the passing of his imprint. After how last night had affected him, he understood he'd never survive it either. He wouldn't even want to try. So if they did figure out how to break the imprint, he had no idea what it would do to him - or his Pack... but he also couldn't fucking care less. He'd shoved that domineering voice of his inheritance down under the tides of his protective instinct. That the Alpha in him wanted her for the stability of the Pack was of no consequence now - Jacob was hardly any use to them anyway.

With a grim sigh, he glanced over the shower curtain again to an empty room, and searing adrenaline shot through his veins like a firestorm, even though he could clearly hear each measuring beat of her heart. His hands snapped up to the rod as he turned his body toward the room with nothing short of panic.

He was seconds away from ripping his way out of the shower and charging across the hall, when she strode back into view shaking a pillow down into its case. A soft lupine whine of relief escaped his throat and Bella's face snapped to the sound. Confusion furrowed her brow at whatever she saw in his face.

"I _need _to see you," he rasped, nothing short of a pitiful plea.

She nodded, an expression he couldn't read flitting over her face, but she threw the pillow on the bed and sat down beside it anyway, picking up her brush from the nightstand.

His wolf appeased, Jacob turned back to the spray of water and grabbed her pink razor from the soap dish.

"Can I use this?" he asked, holding up the implement.

Bella turned over her shoulder and a private smile played on her lips. "Sure."

He watched her pulling the brush through her long mahogany waves as he raked the razor over the stubble on his face with the harsh scratching of two days' growth.

He'd never watched her brush her hair before, and he was thinking at the moment that that was really a Goddamn shame. After she'd worked through the knots, the habitual motion took root in her hand and her movements became slow and sensuous. She luxuriantly brushed with long strokes and a dreamy grace that made her curls coalesce in shining corrugated silk behind them.

_Holy shit, he wanted her._

The razor had fallen to his side long ago while he'd been entranced by the ritual before him and, with monumental effort, he turned his back on that alluring scene to finish his face... and to fucking think.

He _needed _to think.

Luckily there was starting to be a little more space in his crowded brain to do that. As this morning had worn on, his Pack was just starting to fare a little better - interestingly enough, courtesy in part to _Leah_ (and his father). Through the memories of the phased wolves, he watched Leah's usual brash impatience put punch behind Jared's feeble orders and, in that way that all bitchy big sisters had, had garnered resentful compliance.

Now the basics were being covered: the younger wolves were sent on patrols to guard the borders on this sunny day, the Council were gathering at the Clearwaters' with the more experienced Pack, and the intractable Paul was given custody and charge of Charlie's mangled cruiser in a desperate attempt just to get him to shut his fucking mouth.

While Jacob was through making decisions behind Bella's back without her counsel, he also needed to have some kind of strategy when they talked.

Because she'd promised they'd talk and she never broke a promise.

The best plan he could come up with at the moment was to kill James, get her to refuse the imprint and send her off to her mom's. And there was no fucking way she was going to agree to that.

Jacob shoved his face under the shower head and spluttered as he let the water run into his mouth while his mind spun.

It was really pretty black and white. The _only _way to get her to agree was to convince her it was what _he _needed. And it was. Above all other things - position, Pack and the love for her that made his heart bleed with each beat- he _needed _to keep her safe.

And, after last night, it was obvious he just wasn't good enough to do that.

She needed to leave.

He did a quick final rinse-off of his hair and back ( luckily she'd also changed her soap to scentless like her shampoo - smelling of frou-frou strawberries just might have been nearly as bad as leech).

He jerked the water off and wiped a hand down his face, his body turning automatically toward ...an empty room.

His pulse lunged into a sickening sprint. That redolent sweetness that was Bella and arousal had sharpened with an anxious tang, her heartrate was fluttering, and her breath was shallow and quick. But yet there was no _scent _of another body - warm or otherwise.

Still apprehension turned his blood to ice - his wolf was going nuts. He barely had the sense to snatch one of the towels and throw it around his hips. Chanting silent prayers for self-control, he grabbed the second towel and threw it over his shoulder, hastily patting it over his face as he charged across the hall.

"Bell-..."

The A caught in his throat as every last cell in his body screeched to a halt just inside her door.

…

…

…

Jacob blinked soundly. Trying to push that sublime vision into his stalled brain.

She was sitting on the rocking chair in the corner, wrapped in nothing but a creamy sheet tucked over her breasts. She'd carefully rearranged her hair to drape over each bared shoulder in a futile attempt to mask the bruising, but at the moment Jacob hardly cared.

She was simply

utterly

unequivocally

_gorgeous_.

Warm brown eyes peered back at him nervously from under those long curling lashes and a soft blush warmed her cheeks like a sunrise. With delicate shoulders hunched up uncomfortably and her face tipped timidly off to one side -it was just as sick as the rest of this shit - but that feminine diffidence totally made his wolf crazy.

"Ah," that A was finally pushed from his throat but the pressure of ballooning desire.

Her brow furrowed as some of that uncertainty slipped away from candid confusion.

"As in Bella," he croaked, by way of lame explanation. _Holy shit, just a glance and he was a raving lunatic._

Deliciously mismatched raspberry lips curved up in gentle humor at his expense, and she seemed to collect her confidence along with the linens around her body. The sheet flowed down to the floor, caressing that petite frame lovingly as she stood with an uncharacteristic grace.

Which was quickly shattered. The rocking chair knocked back against the wall and the sound made her whip around with a start.

She turned back to him with chagrin pulling the corner of her lip into her mouth.

Jacob tried to offer her a reassuring smile, but he simply had no control of his face. His brain was a million percent occupied with inventorying every little detail: the graceful column of her neck, the delicate hollow of her throat, the way flawless creamy skin swept down to the blossoming swell of breasts pressed up by the arm holding the sheet under them. She looked down then, the curtain of her shining hair falling over one shoulder as her free hand pulled up the linen from her feet in a deliciously feminine way. But dressed in effective white and with that fair skin, the bruise on her arm stood out like a neon sign.

And pushed just the slightest bit of sanity back into his swollen brain. She'd been nearly raped yesterday and here she was offering her body like a sacrifice to yet another monster.

But she was just so ...

she was...

Bella was _so fucking beautiful_.

He found that honorable resolve slipping away with each step she took toward him. Her gaze was locked on his, but his eyes had to obsessively inventory that body, being tantalizingly insinuated by each undulating movement of flowing cloth. It was quite simply the sexiest thing he'd ever seen: the girl of his dreams, wrapped in nothing but bedclothes and promises, approaching him with hope in her dark endless eyes and familiar humor sparkling on her lips.

Fuck, he loved her so much.

The crisp sound of her tongue over her lips made his eyes snap compulsively up to that mouth.

"So I thought maybe we could continue that conversation we started yesterday," she whispered. A nervous little quiver in her voice robbed the glibness of obviously rehearsed words, but it just made them that much more seductive. She was nervous but trying so hard - like always she was caring, genuine... _present_. Just some of the many things he loved about her.

He wanted to make her more comfortable by offering something... a smile, a word, a fucking expression on his face, but his body had a mind of its own. His wolf was perked up in rapt and salivating attention along with his throbbing dick.

Her lashes fluttered as her eyes darted over his face looking for some reaction as she continued her slow purposeful step. With the air of a last resort, finally her gaze slipped down his tense chest and abs and found undoubtedly fucking magnificent evidence of that response. Her eyes snapped back up to his as that rosy stain spread down her neck to settle against her breasts.

Jacob's eyes brazenly followed it, his attention instantly impaled on the pearly press of hard nipples against the sheet.

His tongue reflexively ran over lips. The scent of piqued anxiety was sweetening into thick honeyed arousal and his mouth was literally watering. Just like a dog.

She paused not two feet in front of him, cocking her head to the side as she leisurely considered him and slowly her luscious lips curved up in a knowing smile. It was sexy as hell.

"You okay, Jake?"

Jacob felt his swallow crimp his throat. He'd stopped trying to cajole his body into submission, and was now frantically restraining it. It took every ounce of strength he had not to reach out and grab that tiny body into his arms.

Her lips bunched up on one side with a soft sniffing laugh. It was such a very Bella expression that he found his own lips reflexively twitching. Her attention snapped down to the movement and got stuck on his lips.

And Jacob did the only thing he could ...and closed his eyes on temptation. It was simply too arousing to see her contemplating his mouth while that ambrosial scent bathed his senses in crack.

Rescued from that visual overwhelm, Jacob suddenly realized that - for the first time since he'd phased - he was utterly _alone _in his mind. He could still feel his pack - that omnipresent tug against his soul - but he'd instinctually shut the connection down. He'd thought it was impossible - Lord, how he'd tried. Fucking surprise: his wolf had known how to do it all along.

Now the beast was free and clear to do the only thing that was boiling through its primal brain: take his mate.

And Jacob was so incredibly screwed.

His breath had gone deep and slow long ago, and he switched his focus to that...fervently trying to ignore the sound of her footstep and the sheets whispering behind her like a wedding train. Strangely the fact that she was now walking away from him did nothing to stoke that habitual anxiety in his wolf - the animal was patiently waiting, a palpable purr singing through the marrow of his bones.

He heard the hinges behind him squeak and the soft click of her door ...and the beast howled in anticipation.

Bella cleared her throat softly and he heard the rustle of cloth as she turned around. "So, lemme do a little talking for both us," she murmured, serious and sincere.

He heard her take the several steps to stand right behind him and chill bumps exploded over his skin at the warmth of her proximity.

"I'm guessing you've been trying to think of someway to convince me walk away from this thing," she pronounced simply.

The towel on his shoulder was slowly pulled back, dragging across his nipple and making the muscles shudder over his chest.

"Because you think that last night proves something," she whispered over the rustle of terrycloth. "And it does, but not what you think," she continued cryptically.

Soft cloth pressed against his skin and the muscles jumped against it. She paused a moment and then began patting over the lingering moisture on his back. The residue of shower had now joined the sweat of restraint.

"It proves that we need each other, Jake," she mused quietly. Her words were as thoughtful and gentle as the touch that caressed over his shoulder, sopping up his resolve. "It proves that we're stronger together and our hearts know it," she continued as she smoothed down his Lats to the small of his back. "And it proves that leaving this imprint thing hanging is gonna kill us."

She paused on such a grim pronouncement. And one that was a gazillion percent true. But that didn't mean there wasn't a way out of it.

His rebuttal exploded over his lips. "Bella there's gotta be some-..."

She pinched his excuses off in the bud. _Literally_.

His eyes popped open as he craned over his shoulder in macho indignation. _She'd pinched his ass?_

She was peering up at him with mischief sparkling in her eyes and a saccharine smile.

"Karma," she grinned. "I'd been dying to do that ever since you mooned me in the bathroom."

A fallow laugh burst from his lips.

"Plus I wasn't done yet," she pouted humorously. "Turn back around and go back to closing your eyes again. That was good."

His wolf usually didn't react to orders very well, but oh, was he enjoying this little game. The beast was only too happy to comply.

With a sniffling shake of his head at her gall, he did what he was told. But this time it felt completely different - in her sneaky Jedi mind-trick way she was slowly getting him to relax.

"But here's the most important thing, Jake," she said, the lightness in her voice evaporating as she rubbed the towel down the other side.

That residual curve of his lips pressed into a straight line at her tone.

"Last night was just what you warned me about," she whispered, her voice breaking and hammering a furrow into his brow.

"I mean I know _you_ _know_ what he tried to do... and also what he plans to do," she rasped brokenly as her little hand stilled with the towel at the nape of his neck. "And now you can't say I don't know what I'm getting into," she breathed.

Slowly she pulled the towel down the trench of his spine, "So last night _proves_," she continued, her voice gathering strength and certainty as her fingers lovingly cataloging each vertebrae. "That I know what I'm doing when I say," she stopped her caress at the base of his spine and he heard that whisper of cloth drop to the floor.

"I love you too much to walk away."

Jacob's eyes popped open as his heart imploded, pulling his breath over his lips with a hiss.

"Bells -" he breathed.

She stopped him with the touch of her bare palm against his back over his heart. "Jake, I love you and I trust you," she whispered in a fierce, fiery rasp of breath. "Don't let them win. We can do this, we just gotta take care of us first."

A warmth bloomed in his gut, rising up with a gentle insistent pressure that reinflated his heart.

_Hope_.

"I love you," she breathed over his skin and then he felt the moist press of lips on his spine. His entire body shuddered as she leaned her forehead right between his shoulder blades.

For a moment he was paralyzed, feeling her breath hitch in gusts down his back. "Don't push me away," she murmured. "Please?"

That was it.

In a heartbeat, he'd turned around and pulled her into his side with a fervent arm. His eyes ran over that face and the liquid petition pooling in her eyes as the hand not wrapped around that delicate ribcage came up to brush its fingertips over her cheekbone.

"I'm scared, Bells," he whispered, a vulnerable admission straight from a heart that had never forgotten that it was only 17. It was a confession of weakness that he'd never before let see the light of day since that first crack of bone.

Bella blinked, tears rushing from the corner of her eyes in a lamenting stream. He could see clear down to her soul in that intense presence - that clearly understood the poignancy of such an admission. He watched those yawning eyes swallow down every lonely day encompassed in those three simple words and drown them in loving absolution.

Slowly her hand wrapped under breasts slipped away, trailing over his chest until it rested tenderly on his solar plexus - the center and source of his being.

"It's okay," she whispered. "I'm here. We're together now, Jake."

Jacob's hand traced over her jaw as his eyes greedily guzzled that comfort like a starving man. Which he undeniably was.

And like she always had, Bella waited.

She watched as a thousand memories clicked over his face in microexpressions, each one absorbing that oath and her comfort and finally set free.

His cherishing calloused fingertips wiped at the trail of her tears and then slipped down over her shoulder -pausing to cover the bruise on her arm with a warm redemptive palm - before settling over her hand on his chest.

"God, I love you," he mouthed the words in merely the ephemeral breath of his soul. "I promise..."

The vow was left purposefully hanging to leave room for infinite predicates as he slowly leaned down and branded every last one into her mouth.

They both gasped, the air torn between them and the vacuum swallowing them whole. That electric tingle had transformed into a sucking ache - the visceral yearning of two hearts divided.

Jacob's mouth fastened ravenously over her own instantly voracious hunger as his hand came up to her jaw. His own urgent grunts echoing in her throat, their bodies fumbled desperately trying to get closer.

Stooping over into her ravenous demand, both hands cupped her face as he gulped down her need like a potent accelerant to his own. The plea in those little hands digging into his shoulders - pulling, holding, wanting - made him groan.

The slithering whisper of sheets was the only thing possibly more enticing.

His eyes popped open.

So did hers.

The slow sly curve his lips unzipped their locked mouths.

Heat rushed to Bella's face as she peered back at that sultry and deliciously mischievous smile. His eyes looked like they were fighting not to dip down to where the sheets had slipped to the floor, leaving her body bared to cool incriminating air. They paced between hers... back and forth like a caged animal.

"Can I?" he asked in a plaintive whisper, the break in his voice betraying the desperation behind that roguish grin.

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth as her heart beat in her face. Realizing just how fiercely her hands were digging into his shoulders, she released him, timidly closing her eyes, even while she bravely stepped out of his embrace.

The deafening silence echoed in her ears and made her stomach flip with nerves.

But there were simply no fucking words in any language.

Jacob's brain had been lobotomized in a quick efficient glance - 17 fucking years of anticipation hit him like a freight train.

His wolf was only more than happy to take up the slack and he swiftly pulled the man to his knees so he could get closer to what he'd waited for for infinitely longer.

His mate.

Heated yellow eyes caressed flawless silk that stretched over dainty shoulders and a fine collarbone. That smooth skin swept down into two pert perfect swells peaked with suckable rosebud nipples. Her petite rib cage was a little too prominent - but the alluring plain of her stomach pulled the wolf past the fleeting condemnation of how poorly his human had cared for her.

That expanse of creamy skin, dented with a demure navel, was begging to be painted with his tongue and an appetent growl rose up in the wake of his gaze. The beast covetously surveyed the narrow waist spreading into feminine hips gated by wide hearty bones - perfect for bearing cubs - as heat rushed to his loins.

An annoying triangle of white cotton was the only impediment to the heated waves of honeyed scent that were driving him wild. But since there was so much to explore, the wolf decided he could be patient - at least for the moment. It just meant more pleasure to unwrap very soon.

Greedily he inventoried the rest of his prize: long smooth legs with sturdy thighs made to wrap tightly around his waist so he could ride her hard. Graceful calves and delicate feet that dug nervously in the sheets pooled around her on the floor with an endearing innocence that begged to be ravished. This exquisite creature was custom made to both the man's tastes and the wolf's desire, both inside and out: unfathomable perfection.

A low delirious purr simmered in his chest as the wolf devoured his mate with starving eyes - over and over, frenetically trying to memorize every detail. But he had their long mortal years to survey every pore and he'd waited his preternatural eternity for her already.

It was time.

Hot yellow eyes snapped up to milky breasts and that purr became an anticipant growl as he grabbed for her.

The girl squeaked, stumbling back on the sheets, as her arms flew to her chest.

With lightning reflexes, Jacob caught her, her fear just unsettling enough to his wolf that humanity could snap to the reins. His hands gently steadied her and then slipped up into the air in chagrined surrender.

"Sorry," he grimaced, looking up into her face with eyes viscerally cooling back to sentient. She was frightened, and Jacob wanted to skin his wolf alive. The supernatural immortal that was grafted onto his soul was as old as time itself and it didn't understand how new this was for both them.

And how carefully and tenderly she needed to be touched.

But Jacob did.

"Shh," he crooned soothingly as his eyes darted between hers. Slowly he reached out to her, bringing gentle hands to her wrists and petitioning them away with a feather touch.

Bella bit her lip, as her eyes darted over that face, melting back into the caring man she knew from that fiery feral passion that, moments ago, had lit his eyes with licking flame. She was embarrassed by her reaction - she _knew _the wolf wouldn't hurt her - but the intensity of that hunger was just as frightening as her own... and she just wasn't ready to give everything away.

Bella's hands slowly slithered across the distance, over the peaks and dents of his muscular arms on the way to rest on his shoulders, silently offering forgiveness.

As her redemptive palms settled on his shoulders, Jacob searched her face a moment more, until he was satisfied that any of the lingering hesitancy was from discomfort and not fear.

His large hands reached out to her sides to ghost, slow and soothingly, down over her hips while he followed them this time with awed human eyes.

"You're beautiful," he breathed, a cavernous awe inflating the word like a parachute as he smoothed his big hands down her thighs. "You're perfect, Bella." Jacob looked up back up with eyes that ached.

She still looked uncertain but he just couldn't care at the moment because those breasts had been calling him since they'd first popped free from that fucking sheet.

He couldn't wait any longer.

His hands came up to cup them, gentle, cherishing, as he weighed perfection in each palm.

_Oh God, this was heaven. _

His thumb brushed over one velvet nipple and he heard her soft sucking breath, watching in wonder as chilbumps fled outward over delicate skin like a starburst. The sweet heady scent of arousal seemed to condense from the air like vapored honey.

Hers and his own.

His wolf, all but forgotten in rapture, surprised him with a gratified howl through the marrow of his being as he impatiently jerked his tether with enough force that Jacob got whiplash.

He groaned low in his throat, leaning forward and resting his forehead in the valley between her breasts as instinct clawed and flailed in rebellion. Slowly his arms wrapped around her waist as he feverishly counted the grounding thud of her heart against his brow.

"Oh God," he whispered, squeezing his eyes closed and watching the pyrotechnics explode behind his eyes. He needed to take this slow - for himself just as much as her - but the depth of his reactions were simply staggering.

"It's jus'-..." he panted quietly. "It's just _so much_."

He felt her hand rake soothingly back through his hair to rest at the nape of his neck.

"Um..." he heard the crinkle of her smile. "I'm pretty sure I'm barely a B, Jake."

The unexpected humor hits its mark perfectly, and Jacob threw his head back and barked a deep belly laugh - the kind he hadn't done in over a year.

Still chuckling, he tipped his head back down to her glorious smile. "Now _that _was funny," he grinned.

Bella arched a shrewd brow. "I guess there's a first time for everything, huh?" she quipped, her finger tracing the shell of his ear and highlighting the double entendre.

"Ooo," he pursed his lips theatrically. "Another one." With a grin he hoisted her up effortlessly with him as he as he unfolded to his feet. "Your boobs rock, Bells," he murmured into her hair. Her pealing giggles bubbled up and tinkled to the floor around them.

Once again she'd fluently injected the perfect antidote into the fire that boiled through his veins: the cooling lightness of their friendship. _How the fuck did she always know?_

He pressed a bright grateful smack to her nose as he walked them to the bed. "You're awesome, you know that, right?"

Her cheeks flushed with endearing chagrin, but she leaned forward and pressed gratified lips to his anyway.

"Mmm," he hummed against her leisurely mouth, sitting down at the foot of the bed and pulling her with him as he laid back on the mattress. But the movement made their bare chests slide against each other, satin against silk. The friction was nothing short of ecstasy.

Bella broke the kiss with a gasp as she settled over his chest and Jacob's head lowered slowly back to the bed.

His hands tenderly gathered her shining hair and pulled it over one shoulder, as he watched her luxuriate in the sensual magic between them. Eyes fluttering closed, she rubbed her cheek back and forth over his pec with a soft indolent sigh.

His hands ghosted lightly down her sides, up and down, as he watched her languidly pull her cheek back and forth over his chest, nuzzling his sternum, pressing her lips over his heart, humming contentment into his skin. He felt the full giving press of her breasts, the drag of beaded nipples, the concave softness of her stomach molding against his abs, her rolling hips' purposeful press against his aching arousal.

Captivated, his hands settled at the small of her back, riding her body's graceful undulations over him, each movement winding the spring in his loins ever tighter. It was an exquisite torture that he was all too happy to endure, just to see her so happy and free.

"Mmm...you feel so good, Jake," Bella breathed, her eyes blinking back open with a dreamy smile, meeting his watching her over the plains of his cheeks.

_Jacob loved her._

He loved _watching _her - the words were whispered silently in his stare, gently curved ripe russet lips, softened his heavy brow. The hard shuttered chrysalis had split away from the luscious tender quick- if only for this moment - and his soul was swimming in the onyx pools of his eyes like days she thought she'd thought were lost.

_This _was Jacob. _Her _Jacob.

Joy welled up in her heart like tsunami, spilling over in a single effervescent laugh over her lips, carefree and blithe. It ignited a sunny gazillion kilowatt smile on the man beneath her. Her hands came up to knit under her chin on his chest as she basked in his warmth like a day on the beach.

He sniffed a laugh at her unapologetic stare and a hand rode the rail of her spine, jumping shoulder to cheek where his fingers began cherishingly tracing her hairline. "I can't believe you're here," he murmured, the words ephemeral and dissipating on his breath.

Bella picked her chin up off her knuckles and arched a questioning brow. "Hmm?"

Jacob drew in a breath, shifting under her as both hands came up to rake his nails sensuously over her scalp. Bella's eyes fluttered closed with a hum of pleasure.

"In my bed, naked."

Bella's eyes popped open as her smile tilted, pulling her head to the side and into that big warm palm.

"Well - _technically _ - you're in _my _bed," she corrected him slyly.

Jacob's eyes had been tracing her mouth and they slithered up to her eyes as that predictable flash of dominance sparked in his eyes at her tease.

"And - _technically - _you're not naked," he retorted, the words sticky and cinching his lips in a purse.

Her tummy did a little flip as she chewed on the inside of her cheek.

The purse of his lips slipped into a private smile as his gaze idly washed over her blush while his hands crept over her hair and filtered down to brush down the curve of her back. They stopped in a slow warm cup over her butt.

Settling, they kneaded slowly, pointedly pushing them into that hard ridge of flesh. Bella sucked in a breath as her hands balled up into fists under her chin and his eyes leisurely cataloged the little twitches in her face that mimicked the sparkles exploding in her brain. She crossed her ankles between his calves to try to cage that swollen ache between her thighs.

"What's up with these, Bells?" he whispered, teasing and suggestive at the same time.

Bella's eyes dropped in chagrin as her heart beat in her face; suddenly she felt out of her depth, uncertain and certainly not at her snarky best. Though she knew this was just as new for him, Jacob was so... confident.

She heard his sniff. "It's so _you_."

Her eyes darted up along with her chin off her hands. But her indignant scowl instantly softened at the look in his eyes - he was trying to make her comfortable.

"That little neurotic self just couldn't go all the way, huh?" he teased with a little wink, his hands stilling on her hips, taking pity on her.

But his thumbs couldn't seem to resist slipping under the cotton string of her bikini, brushing across the bare skin. His touch had gone as soothing as his eyes and it gave her indignation just the needed little spark of confidence.

"Oh, I'm going all the way, alright," she whispered looking him dead in the eye as she reached a finger out to trace his chin with her best attempt at coy.

The air thickened between them as his mouth curved in sultry approval and it made a little starburst of heat detonate in her chest.

"Soo..." he dragged the word out on an exaggerated croon as his thumbs looped under each string and tugged gently. "How do you feel about these?"

Her wry smile dried up instantly in a confused frown.

Jacob's lips lifted up from those front teeth with a smile at her expense. "I mean, are they special or sentimental or some shit?"

Bella snorted with a roll of her eyes. "How can underwear be _sentimental_, Jake?"

He didn't answer, but his fingers snapped incidentally at each hip and magically her panties were held in his taunting hand. Holding her gaze, with a little theatrical twirl he tossed them out of sight.

"Now that's not fair!" she complained, covering her discomfiture with teasing complaint.

Jacob raised his brow even as his hands came down to smooth eagerly over her bare skin.

For a second, she simply couldn't get her mouth to work - his big warm hands felt _so incredibly good_ as they rubbed over her bottom while his eyes sparkled with relish and sunlight. His fingers brushed over the crease above her thigh before dragging lightly up the crack making her shudder and blush, torn between the impulse to collapse in submission or twist away in mortification.

She cleared her throat with an attempt to hold the reins and stay the course.

"I mean," she choked, the thin squeaky sound of her voice robbing her pitiful attempts. "Now I'm naked and you've still got this freaking towel." She wiggled her hips meaningfully over the bunched up terrycloth and was vindicated by his frozen hands and soft throaty moan.

She did it again, enjoying the fact that with a twitch of her hips, she had the power to subdue that swagger and make his eyes roll in his head.

"Oh, I'm all about fair," he sucked the word through his teeth with a surprising buck of his hips. In the ensuing space between them he ripped the towel away in a lightning snap.

Bella's widened eyes followed the blur of white fabric disappearing over the side of the bed... but her body absently settling over a hard ridge of heat snapped every last sense to the sensation.

She heard his long low groan echo her own as her hands gripped his shoulders, holding on for dear life as her body exploded in scintillating fireworks like a Forth of July grand finale, their drumfire muted like a smothered 808 bass. She realized it was the beat of her heart.

Jacob could feel it pounding frantically opposite his own as his hands came up clasp that full perfect ass with rapturous gusto.

Holy fuck, he was going to explode. The warm silken give of her stomach against his burning dick was simply more than he could handle.

But he _had _to.

Even if he was already weary and worn from fighting this invisible war. Every time she touched him, his wolf howled through his bones with dark erotic imagery that was exactly _not _the way her first time should be. Or his. He _had _to stay in control. If he fucked this up, he'd never forgive himself.

But Bella wasn't helping. Not one fucking bit.

Her hips undulated over him like a sensuous summer swell - testing, feeling.

Jacob's eyes popped open to find sloe-eyes watching him from under half-mast lids and her mouth quirking sly. _So fucking edible._

Holding his gaze, she tipped her head down and pressed strawberries to his lips and then pulled back her breath hitching over his skin. His wolf growled low in his gut in approval as Jacob grasped those hips and pressed into them with a rolling thrust.

Without a word, his hands slipped up her back to her head, pulling her back down to a mouth that was hot and open. With insistent pressure he smothered her gasp in a sweltering kiss that sizzled with his breath between his teeth.

Bella's surprise was instantly melted, the glowing embers in her belly rising with licking flames. She groaned in shameless pleasure as his hips started moving under the pressure of his palm over her tailbone, bringing his body's prod up between her legs again. She desperately tried to scoot her body down to meet him, cursing the disparity in their size.

That hand then slipped possessively up to the small of her back and he was fluidly turning them over, clasping her into the frenetic massage of his mouth with a palm at the back of her head. Holding her firmly to his chest he slowly lowered her to the mattress while Bella desperately gulped down those kisses and suckled fervently at that twisting velvet tongue. He was trying to spare the bruising on her back, some part of her anesthetized brain realized, as her arms entwined around his neck covetously.

And then he was pressing her down.

Jacob felt like he was trying to push back a tidal wave. The rushing rapids of sheer lust took his breath away. He gasped frantically from her ardent kisses, borrowing her breath in attempt to resuscitate sanity. But it only fanned the flames higher.

He tore his mouth away, sucking a jagged breath through his nose in a desperate last ditch effort to gain control.

But he'd underestimated... many things.

The feel of her, vulnerable and receptive, beneath him - the way her mouth followed his flight pressing to the soft flesh under his chin with urgent little grunts of demand - awakened the deepest instinct in all parts of him.

_Mine_.

He pushed her roughly back to the bed, absorbing the force with his palm as his mouth ardently nipped at her jaw in dominion, laving away the pinch with apologetic tongue. Bella gasped in his arms, her fingers digging into his shoulders as she tipped her head instinctively into the slow steady descent of his mouth.

To the tender hollow under her ear.

To her skipping pulse.

His mouth was drawn like a magnet to that sweet spot on her neck that called to him like a siren.

The wolf was _pushing_, but not the usual way. He wasn't railing against the restraints of dominion, but adding fuel to the fire of the man's own burning need: the longing of his soul which had hungered for completion for far too long, the yearning of his heart which had ripened over 17 years to bursting crescendo, and his libidinous body weeping for release.

Even the part of him that was stalwart Alpha was roused. That taciturn, calculated anchor was dragging him down into the delirious depths with imperious demand. Up until now that part of him at least had - as he did with his own charges - stood dispassionately aside, curbing intervention, as long as the man was on the right path. While he _waited_ for that war between instinct and heart to settle.

But now he'd joined the front lines again because that war was settling alright... along with the first knee between her thighs.

His hot fervent mouth had latched over a tendon that had set Bella's world on fire and her legs spread encouragingly as her body bloomed with need. Her hands were digging frantically into those straining shoulders, begging him closer. She _needed _to feel that weight, that strength, that bulk ...to contain her so she didn't fly apart at the seams.

"Jake," she gasped

His mouth left her neck to answer, covering her plea with hot demand. His kisses were hungry and wanting, peeling back her lips with the click of teeth and siphoning a guttural groan into the roof of her mouth.

And then - _finally _- his big body was pressing her down into the mattress again. She gasped, yanking his breath into her lungs, as she instinctively arched up to meet him.

He pinned her down.

"Mine."

The word was cut from a dark pepper growl and stitched into her mouth, but this time Bella wasn't afraid. The edict awakened a deep and recondite yearning. She _wanted _to be his, she _wanted _him to be hers. It was the most natural thing in the world - as unremarkable as the next breath.

"Mine," she answered in a mumble rolled into his lips.

She felt his wolf's scintillating purr of approval shiver down his body against her.

_Holy fuck she felt amazing. _

Small, trembling beneath him with anticipation, she'd wrapped her heels around his thighs in an avid embrace. His hand slipped out from under hips, the mattress now doing their work, and smoothed it possessively up her side in the trench between his body and the bed. It joined the other one, tangling in her hair and holding her with a gentle insistence under his insatiable ravaging mouth. But she was right there with him, swallowing his gluttony and tattooing her pleasure into his shoulders with fervent nails.

Hips ground his desire into the mattress, the tip of his aching cock jutting against the apex of her thighs and drawing a moan with each press. She was so small that with her eye level as she was, the distance was a blessed prophylactic between simply losing it and plunging into that heat.

And he needed to take care of her first.

Unable to pull his mouth away, he dragged his open mouth over her cheek in a primal formless caress and then worshiped that graceful column of her neck again as she pushed it needily into his mouth. The latent primal instinct to _bite-restrain-fuck _made his mouth water, balls burn, and his hips curve up dangerously, the throbbing tip of his erection dipping between her folds.

Bella's low keening moan brought him back to tenuous sanity.

_Not yet! Oh fuck, keep it together, Black._

His lips popped open along with his eyes, glancing up to her face.

It was a mistake.

Heavy lids laid over rolling eyes and her mouth sensually lax, her pink quivering tongue was indolently caressing her lower lip in the most erotic expression he'd ever seen. The wolf viciously bucked against his restraint with its imperative demand; his mate was ripe, ready, wanting.

Jacob gulped, crashing his lips back to her collarbone in a desperate appeal for distraction as he scooted his body down the bed and out of the danger zone.

_Breasts, think about her breasts._

His arms dragged carefully from under her abused shoulders, molding to that delicate ribcage as his mouth massaged over creamy skin, grasping at sanity. The soft pert swells instantly captured the animal's frenzied focus and it pounced on an erect rosebud nipple.

Bella cried out under him, arching against his firm embrace as her hands fisted in his hair.

And again sentience snapped his eyes open to the sight of her pleasure, its overflow in panting over passion-rosy lips. Growling low in his gut, he fought the beast back as he attentively devoured with tenderness, rolling her straining nipple over his tongue while she writhed in his firm grip and pulled feverishly at his hair.

And then he took the other one.

His breath was coming in harsh pants whose steam condensed over her skin making chillbumps raise like rain. He licked and laved between the peaks of her breasts, hungrily collecting the little beads of perspiration like powdered sugar. She tasted so fucking good - literally just how her arousal scented; rich cream and wildflower honey spiced with seductive flowering ginger.

It was driving him mad.

And pulling him compulsively toward the ground zero where that fragrance began. He could feel how wet she was against his stomach and his every sense was focused like a laser beam on that one heated spot. With herculean restraint, he forced himself to take his time, kissing along the line of her ribcage, lathering the smooth flat expanse of her stomach with his tongue. Greedy hands slipped down to the swell of her hips and, with a little hungry nip at a protruding hipbone, he drew back to examine his treasure.

"Jake!" Bella shrieked, tugging at his hair in a different sort of way.

The distress in her tone was the only thing that could have pried his eyes away from that delectable nest of glistening auburn curls.

Head jerked off the mattress, her impassioned blush had deepened to scarlet and she was staring at him with wide-eyed mortification. She'd finally extricated herself enough from the thrall of passion to divine his intentions - and she was embarrassed and uncertain.

But Jacob was losing his mind.

"_Please_," he begged - only a choke in the back of his throat. With a desperate furrow of his brow, he scooted up a little farther softening his grip and planting a tense line of cajoling kisses over her stomach.

His wolf didn't understand and was impelling him just to _take_. While Jacob understood that little OCD streak of hers - on top of this all being so new - he was sorely tempted to take the beast's advice. She smelled _that _fucking good.

He must have truly looked as pitiful as he felt because she frowned, releasing his hair and propping herself up on her elbows. "Jake, it's -.." she began with squinted excuses.

"Just _one taste_," he interrupted, sounding like he'd been smoking a pack a day for years. "The wolf-..." he swallowed, wincing at the animal's impatient swipe. "_Please_."

Bella blinked at him a moment, several emotions flitting across her face that he didn't have the presence to understand because her body made a decision. As she slowly lowered herself back to the bed, Jacob solicitously rubbed his nose back and forth across her abdomen as he watched her lay her head back down.

And then his attention snapped back to that tantalizing heat pressed into his chest. He scooted back down the bed slowly - trying not to spook her - as he trailed kisses _oh, so casually_ over that white chocolate silk while his hands sneakily curled around her thighs to hold his prey. His big body was hanging off the end of the bed as he drew back and examined that nest of curls beaded with luscious pearls of want.

"Mmm," he hummed indolently, leaning in to rub his nose over that exquisite scent, marking his skin and wishing it were permanent. He fact that Bella was tense and twitching didn't even register in his fevered brain as 300% of his attention focused along with tongue on parting those swollen lips.

_That fucking taste._

Ripened female, ready mate... liquid fucking ecstasy.

It singed every synapse as his tongue dove deep and struck gold in slippery silk. His hands held her writhing hips with incidental strength as he stroked up the lush sleek folds of her body to a smooth little pearl. His tongue circled it like predator and then drew it into his mouth.

Bella's body rose like the tide with a throaty cry that could bring down the stars, and Jacob's eyes darted up from chestnut curls to see her arching ardently on the bed.

_Ho. Lee. Fuck._

His engorged cock was weeping it wanted to be in that so bad and - as sick as the rest of this - he _needed_ every drop of his seed planted in her body. A resonant growl rose up in his gut as simultaneously reached up to slip his arms under her shoulders and pushed off the floor over her writhing torso.

His body found hers with exacting aim.

Only her shriek and the crash of his head against her headboard stopped him from sheathing himself to the hilt.

Jacob froze, panting like a racehorse with the effort, while the beast snarled through his bones.

It was the shock really.

The delirious haze of rapture effortlessly stoked by Jacob's tongue had been impaled on his abrupt movement. Gasping, Bella's hands reached up behind his straining back, tentatively surveying the quivering topography and lay of the land. Between her legs was the most delectable heady ache - right in the exact spot she'd been craving. Just a little hot smooth piece of him was pressing at her yearning entrance.

_And oh my freaking God, she wanted more._

Her legs climbed his thighs to wrap around his tight butt on her body's quest just for that and she heard him strain air between his teeth. His chest was pounding with the rhythm of his breath against hers as he stayed, immobile and motionless, above her, leaving her teetering on the edge of erotic frustration.

He was fighting, and the herky-jerky pace was simply killing her. She picked her head up and pressed her lips to his sternum in a shredded velvet plea.

"Jacob," she gasped into the hollow of his throat, wishing she weren't so small, he so big, that she was stuck in the grotto of his raging pulse and could see his...

"I need to see your eyes," his guttural words were barely intelligible and abruptly he was pulling her body off the mattress.

At the head-spinning movement Bella squeaked, her hands snapping up to his shoulders. She sought his face as he scooted across the bed with her body held facilely in one arm: it was stoic and intense - a steel shutter over holocaust heat.

She shivered involuntarily as he hung his feet over the side of the mattress. But his hands were tender - so very cherishing and tender - as they resituated her in his lap.

She wrapped her ankles loosely around his butt -trying to ignore that hot hard press into her stomach between them - as she took stock. At least now she could see what the heck was going on.

"Hey," she whispered, bringing a hand around to stroke his cheek. "You okay?"

He nodded once curtly as his hands slipped around to rest on her waist. Her brow dipped as her gaze darted between his eyes - they were flickering with yellow like a bad incandescent bulb. She brought her other hand up to cup his cheeks between both palms as she leaned up and pressed her lips to his with balmy caring.

He sucked in a breath and pulled back, his chest still heaving.

"I love you, Jacob," she stated, simple, sure and true. "And that felt so good."

His nostrils flared as he searched her face. "I don't wanna hurt you," he choked.

Bella smiled sadly as she stroked his cheek. "I think part of it always does the first time, right?" she soothed. "But so far so good. I mean, _soooo good,_" she proffered a playful smile.

He blinked several times over those wild flickering eyes darting over her face like fireflies as his breath continued to hitch in uneven rasps.

"Jake," she called him back to her. "Stop fighting," she cupped her hands soundly at his jaw, staring deep into those conflicted eyes. "I love you," she shook his head gently with her conviction. "Man, wolf, Alpha... I love _all _of you. I _want _all of you."

His rasping breath stuttered as his body jerked under her - it was just a subtle hitch that felt like his skeleton had been yanked under his flesh. Concern furrowing her brow, she watched his eyes blinking rapidly like a hummingbird's wing until finally they snapped shut like a steel door.

"Jake?" she whispered worriedly, gentling her grip and smoothing her hands over his cheeks. "Jacob?"

His face was as utterly unmoving as his body... even his breath had stilled in his chest. It scared her something fierce.

She smoothed both hands over his hair, anxiety rising in her throat.

"Jacob Ephraim Black!"

Those eyes popped open, instantly sharp and focused in her own.

Bella sucked in a breath as her gaze paced between his.

His eyes were _different_.

Dark and fathomless, plummeting into the eternity of soul but luminescent with sparks of flame. Like a midnight sky streaked with lightning.

Her hands fell away from him numbly, frightened.

Without an expression or word, he drew in a long clear breath through his nose as his shoulders rose along with it, settling back. Those intense eyes blinked once and started a circuit of her face, softening infinitesimally.

"Bella." Her name was no more than the a breath in the roof of his mouth.

"Jake?" she whispered, her hands again slipping up to his chest. She could feel his heart, pounding under her fingers in a slow, steady beat as his chest rose and fell with deep clear breaths.

Suddenly she understood.

"You're all there?" she ventured quietly.

His eyes snapped back to hers with a cagey alertness. "Yes."

The single word was deep, sonorous. Like the times she'd heard him speak to his Pack.

"Good," she whispered. A hesitant smile curved her lips as she rubbed her palm slowly over that stalwart heart.

"It feels..." he left the sentence dangling into the unfathomable, but those full sensuous lips subtly curved.

Bella's smile grew roots and she leaned up to kiss his lips.

He met her halfway with a giving mouth. Soft lips lead her own in a gentle but firm dance, neither pushing nor hesitating, just feeling and inflating her heart with each caress. Warm hands ghosted up her back, gathering her hair in his palms like water as he cupped the back of her head and tipped his face to the other side, suckling her sighs over his lips.

It was a heady kiss.

A tender kiss.

It's intimacy was almost _painful _in its intensity like the friction between their two souls.

His palms slipped around to her jaw and pulled her away with the soft moist smack of clinging skin.

"Breathe," he commanded in that deep easy voice, but his lips flirted with a dappled smile.

Immediately she gasped breath into lungs she realized _were _burning.

Jacob's eyes had returned to heated intensity as he stroked his fingers over her cheek.

"You're beautiful," he stated in a way that seemed not complimentary but simply the God's honest truth. "You're mine."

Her eyes snapped to his.

"I need you," he pronounced in that same calm easy bass, his face intense and unapologetic.

Bella licked her lips. "I need you too," she whispered.

His gaze rested in one eye and then moved to the other, his hands slipping away from her face. One fell to cover hers still resting over his heart and encircled it warmth, pulling it up to his lips. He slowly pressed a delicate kiss on three of her fingers as he watched her for a moment over her hand.

And then he lowered her it to his lap.

Bella gasped, at the feel of velvet over heated steel as her hand wrapped around his length. She still hadn't seen his body - and had resisted the impulse to sneak a peek at the hot press into her stomach when the opportunity arose, for obvious reasons - but now her eyes eagerly took their chance.

She leaned back a little as her attention snapped to the erotic strength encircled by her hand. The velvet shaft peaked in a smooth bulbous tip and still glistened with her body's own juices. Heat exploded in her belly as she brought her other hand to curiously smear the beaded moisture over steely satin

She heard Jacob hiss as his hands gripped her hips and his forehead slowly fell down to her shoulder.

Bella leaned her cheek against his temple as her hand caressed gently up and down his length, tentatively exploring that silken skin with a feather touch. It was such an intimate experience - holding this part of him while she listened to his breath hitch against her cheek - that her heart felt like it was expanding in her chest even as the apex of her own thighs grew hot and heavy.

It must be the same for him too, because as she watched, his erection seemed to impossibly grow in her hand and she blinked out of her erotic thrall. Come to think of it, it actually didn't look very comfortable - the tip looked bruised and swollen. And it was then that she really consciously processed that _this _was what was going to be thrust between her legs.

She stopped her delicate strokes as she picked her head up, cocking it to the other side as considered him and Jacob slowly straightened. She could feel his eyes on her.

_But oh, God, how was that going to fit?_

Like everything else on him, Jacob was bigger than Paul - the glimpse of him the other night being the only thing close to experience she had - and even then, the fleeting thought had passed her mind. Here, Jacob's body stood glorious and proud between them, stretching past her navel.

Her eyes darted up to his reflexively.

Jacob was watching her carefully with possessive eyes.

"You were made for me," he whispered softly, cannily answering her private question, as his hands smoothed up to her waist.

Bella's hands gently released him, running her palms over his chest as she considered that a moment. "I'm not scared," she murmured in response, surprised to find it was true once she thought about it. Over a mere week she'd gone searching for her lost best friend and found her soulmate, seen the boys she'd grown up with as well as herself radically transform, faced imperious old men and egomaniacal bloodthirsty monsters and almost lost it all. Insecurities about sex - which women had been having since the beginning of time - just didn't register on this new scale.

"But," she arched a brow as her lips hitched up on one side. Something in her wanted to know if she could still tease with this new unified Jacob. "I'm six months older, so - _technically _- you were made for _me_."

That intimidating intensity seamlessly blossomed in a broad sunny smile that somehow looked deliciously organic in that virility. It was the same sun and the same smile, but it looked different. Deeper? Perhaps it was because, framed as it was by the sobriety of lost innocence, it shone all the brighter: a man who'd been through hell and seen it all but still chose to love with abandon.

All Bella really knew was that it was comforting.

"Y'see, Bells," he grinned. "It's jus' that I'm a gentleman, so I let you go first."

Bella gave him a theatrically dubious nod and then smirked. "I thought you were a 'mean, scary, kick-ass wolf,'" she quote him, dredging up memories of that 7th grade bonfire.

His eyes sparkled with recognition. "That too," he winked.

Bella giggled, her joy bubbling over as she leaned up and pressed her lips to his. With a soft hum, the curve his mouth melted against hers, letting her lead as his hands idly circled her waist, brushing his fingers over her spine.

He broke the kiss when she was breathless, and leaned his head against hers for a moment. "We were waiting for you for a long time, Bella," he whispered, the words making her rolling breath catch.

She picked her head up and stared back into those deep, unfathomable eyes.

"We were waiting to come and find you," he continued, seeming to gingerly pluck the words from his mind like he was fumbling with an explanation for something inexplicable. She supposed he was.

"Now I get it, Bells."

Because he did.

Jacob was power, passion and heart all inextricably rolled into a burning mandate: to lead and protect. Living within the confines of any one of those facets of himself - or alternately denying them - made him unbalanced and weak. But woven together he could be nearly unstoppable.

Bella had taught him that.

Her profession of love - when he was at his breaking point- had been the last push and binding needed to fuse all three warring factions of himself together.

For her.

She was the missing piece he'd been searching for somehow before the beginning of his mortal life - he could feel that truth deep in his being. She was the manifest craving of his spirit to be whole. With a ponderous destiny on his shoulders, she was his partner: his strength, his counsel, his solace, his ballast in this world.

As he was for her.

In other words, a _gift_. An imprint was a priceless gift.

_Finally _he got it.

Funny thing was, so did she.

She leaned up and pressed her lips to his again. "Jacob," she murmured with a wet smack.

"Ephraim." _Kiss_.

"Black," her lips melted against his, calling to all three facets of his being that she'd bound together with her love.

"God, I love you," he proclaimed in a rush of breath as his hand slipped up to the back of her head and pressed her passionately into that truth. She met his ardor head-on with a crisp demanding mouth that tasted of honeyed promises and soulful demand.

There was nothing left between them; no boundary or clammy membrane of fear and the intimacy of that kiss was staggering.

Jacob groaned in deep in his throat as his forearm wrapped under her ass and pulled her to his body, pressing her into his need. While her arms wrapped passionately around his neck and his hand fisted in her hair, he lifted her body, rubbing his burning desire along the groove of slick satin heat. She made the most gratifying little grunts in the back of her throat as her heels pressed against his tailbone encouragingly.

But this time there was none of the desperation of fear and uncertainty behind their movements, just the slow, patient, steady march toward completion.

Jacob took his time, stroking her body up and down his with an effortless arm while he explored her mouth with savoring tongue. He then nipped over her jaw to suckle on her pulse. Bella threw her head to the side with a sexy moan while she raked her fingernails over his shoulders with passion that drove him wild. Each minute movement, each touch of nail and skin, each taste and sound stoked a blessed blistering heat in his balls.

"Jake, please," she gasped to the sky as he laved her collarbone with a worshipful tongue.

Jacob's lips curved against that creamy silk; her body was burning as much as his.

A low growl percolated in his chest as his hand released her hair, to slip down between her shoulder blades and steady her as he lifted her with his forearm. He captured a breast in fervid lips and suckled hard, relishing the way she arched and squirmed in his arms with a whimpered cry.

His body vibrated in a guttural answering snarl as he pounced on the other straining nipple - he was all about fair after all.

"Jake!" Bella shrieked, her body shuddering in his hands like any minute she would crumble.

He held her together with strong hands, as he tipped his face up to lap up the delectable column of her neck repentantly.

"Shh," he crooned under chin while her breath heaved in her chest. "Here we go, honey."

He drew in a long cooling breath over the sound of her quavering gasps and slowly lowered her down his body. His need found hers impeccably and he moaned at the feel of her tight heat slipping over the head of aching dick.

He paused, gathering his forbearance through his body's impulse to thrust all the way home. But he'd never hurt her; there was no other moment when that truth was more evident.

Biting his lip in a sharp reminder, his eyes popped open. Bella's head was thrown back and she was panting breathlessly to the ceiling.

"Look at me," he whispered. It was a cashmere command that instantly had her face tipping back down. Hair disheveled, cheeks flushed, and her eyes rolling in her head - drunk with ardor - she was the sexiest thing he'd ever seen.

"S'okay?" he murmured, licking over the seam of those swollen lips. She tipped her head to the side capturing his tongue and suckling hungrily.

He took that as a yes.

While his mouth molded to hers, he slowly, patiently, worked her body down over his shaft, holding her into the little twitches of his hips with a strong steady arm.

The heat and pressure ... there were just no words.

Jacob broke the kiss with a growling gasp, their wild eyes finding each other and echoing the shock of such pleasure as he slowly pumped his body further into hers.

Until he reached resistance.

Bella's nails dug into his shoulders as she whimpered and Jacob blinked back to concerned focus. Her eyes were liquid and her nostrils were flared and quivering in unconscious sympathy with the body trembling in his arms.

And Jacob stopped.

Leaning in, he pressed his lips to hers in a tender, comforting kiss as the power of his inheritance welled up around them, swaddling her overwhelm in protective heat.

Dark endless eyes were locked in his as he slowly pulled her up his erection and then incrementally pushed her back down until he reached that ceiling.

Again and again, sumptuous and slow, each stroke of her flesh scalding his dick with ecstasy.

"Bella," he panted breathlessly, searching for permission.

She gave it to him a rasp. "Do it."

Staring into those yawning pupils, Jacob swallowed as he lifted her off of his body with an arm whose muscles were jerking and trembling with want.

And then pulled her back down at the same time he jerked his hips up into the marrow of her being, smothering her soft cry with heated power and hungry lips.

With that soft pop of flesh. lupine triumph howled through his bones and exited in a throaty groan as he tipped his head back into the crushing euphoria. Gasping cool air desperately into the inferno raging within him, he tried to fish sentience out of the fires of rapture. Seated fully on his throbbing body, the haven of her tight wet heat was indescribable heaven.

But concern for her had his face tipping back down, his eyes blinking back into the intensity between them. She was clasped fervently to his chest, her forehead pressed into his shoulder and fingers digging soundly into his biceps.

"Bells," he worried, cocking his head to see her face. She was panting against him, little bursts of warm breath billowing over his skin.

He heard her thick swallow as she picked her head up. Her eyes were shining but floating in her head and her lips curved in an intoxicated novocaine smile.

She leaned up and dissolved his worry with a lazy kiss and breathed her edict into his mouth, "More."

Because she needed it.

He'd skewered her body right down the middle of her craving, razing emotional and physical barriers in one fluent thrust. Filling her cavernous need with stretching heat and inflating her heart with wonder. Jacob was _inside _her in the most intimate of ways, quenching a pining hunger she hadn't really understood.

Until now.

Now... even more insistent than her body aching in its submission to his girth, was the need for friction. It was like taking a bite of the most delectable dessert and resisting the urge to swallow.

He gulped down her plaintive kiss even as he lifted her hips again with that trembling muscled arm and Bella hissed through her teeth, throwing her head back in throes of that satisfying drag over the burning ache of her body. He pulled her all the way up that long hardened heat and the tugged her back down, his feral growl echoing her groan of rapture.

And again... slow, steady, perfect.

He shifted beneath her and her eyes popped open to see him scooting up toward the head of the bed, his eyes locked on hers with hunger. She heard the scrape wood on wood as his foot pushed her nightstand out of the way and his hand left her back to grip the post of her headboard.

His face was intense, feral, and darkly sexy as his pearly teeth bit into that full lower lip. Bracing himself by one hand on her headboard, he held her up and began thrusting his hips up into her body while Bella gripped his shoulders and tried to hold his burning eyes.

From that previous slow sultry pace his movements became more fervent and demanding, stoking unnamable sensations through her body that exited her lips in the only word that came close:

"Jacob," she gasped, collapsing forward with a petitioning mouth.

Jacob smothered her cry with a searing kiss.

Each plunge of his body fanned the flames ever higher. It was a beautiful torture and every breath of it was glorious.

_Holy fuck, he was burning alive_.

And she was right there with him.

Her lips ravenously demanded more, effortlessly consuming the breadth of his passion and pushing him faster with gasps of his name. Her soft breasts jiggling against his chest, her ass bouncing on his arm, her nails tattooing her desires into his shoulders, it was driving him fucking bat-shit crazy.

Her eyes had rolled back in her head long ago, and Jacob gave in to the demands of primal instinct. In a lithe lightning movement, he was turning them back onto the bed. Bella gasped her approval in his neck and wrapped those sexy legs tighter around his waist.

A feral growl of anticipation boiled in his gut as he settled her back on the bed looping his arms under her shoulder blades and clasping her shoulders. Dragging his lips over her temple, he pressed her body down.

"God, don't stop!" Her muffled moan into his skin and the way her hips wiggled, trying desperately to recreate that narcotic friction undid him. She wanted more... _needed _it.

Some lingering thread of restraint viscerally popped and fluttered free and his hips started pumping in earnest as he held her in firm arms against each stroke to spare her back.

"Fuck," he gasped into the unbearable pleasure as his hips thrust into that tight slippery heat in movements that were as innate and primal as the beat of his heart and, at the moment, infinitely more vital.

Bella wrapped her legs tighter, arching up against his body as he pumped into the crescendo of her delirious cries. The heat and pressure was building and building, his movements stuttering under the crushing weight.

Bella toppled over the edge first, smothering her gasping cry in his neck as her body convulsed around him, shucking him quickly after. His seed exploded in heat as he slammed into her body, pushing it deeply into her womb as a tsunami of ecstasy surged over him. He gave it voice tipping his head back with a primal roar.

In the distance it was eerily answered by the threaded chorus of howls. His Pack.

But the sensations didn't stop, if anything they continued escalating.

Wave after wave of pleasure thrashed him, dragging him along in a suffocating undertow until he was choking and rolling over onto his back.

"Bella," he croaked, as the crushing tide of power coursed over him.

Mouth open, she was gasping on his chest, her wild eyes frantically seeking his. His hands came up to cup her jaw and steady her wobbling head. "J-Jake..._so much_," she wheezed over quivering lips. "It's-..."

Her eyes rolled under her fluttering lids and her head went limp in his hands.

Snapping his burning eyes closed, he lowered her to his chest and held her over his racing his heart.

_They'd never said it was like this._

He gritted his teeth as the violent rapids of pleasure and power churned over him, feeling like they were sloughing him down to his soul's quick. It was magic, some lingering sentience realized, as he clasped his unconscious imprint protectively to his heaving chest.

_Stop fighting_, he heard her voice whisper in his head - memory or more magic, he didn't care. Because it was _Bella's _voice and she'd always lead him true.

And so he did.

As his Pack's lupine cries continued to climb the fledgling day, Jacob's lips popped open in a gasp as he arched into that obliterating heat …

...and oblivion.

'

* * *

'

_Review if you like. _


	15. We

_This chapter is dedicated to my two favorite Tammys. Perfection at its best. :-) _

_Thanks for reading and hope you enjoy._

'

**Angel **

_(Lyrics by Jack Johnson)_

I've got an angel

She doesn't wear any wings

She wears a heart that can melt my own

She wears a smile that can make me wanna sing

She gives me presents

With her presence alone

She gives me everything I could wish for

She gives me kisses on the lips just for coming home

But you're so busy changing the world

Just one smile can change all of mine

We share the same soul

'

* * *

**Chapter 15 - We**

* * *

'

Jacob felt like he was surfacing from beneath leagues of water.

Like white noise, light coalesced into little swimming golden sparkles behind his eyes to the soundtrack of rice crispies. That crackling sound slowly faded into the distant tinkling of wind chimes as a vision shimmered into focus like a mirage:

A man lay on a rumpled pillow, the cream color in stark contrast to his licorice hair and toffee skin.

Realization turned his blood to ice on the heels of a buckling disorientation: he _recognized _that man... _vaguely_. Because it was _him_, but he'd never seen _this _man in the mirror, in the reflection of others' eyes or even in the minds of his Pack.

Was it a dream?

The harsh masculine lines of his features were familiar - carved as they were 15 months ago by the hand of congenital fate. But gone was the stony, aggressive, and intimidating leader that seemed to do nothing but inspire fear and deferent obedience these days.

_This _man was handsome - strikingly so - whose features were balanced perfectly between the softness of a caring heart and the hardness of potent virility. In the vulnerability of sleep, the furrow in his heavy brow was relaxed and his lips were curved subtly at the corners, naturally hitched up from his front pearly teeth in the hint of a sunny smile just waiting for the dawn.

This was a kind face- the face of a man who cared and felt deeply and loved with the same ruthless power that had etched dominion into his features.

For the first time in his life, Jacob _saw _the warm uncompromising heart that Bella had always claimed he'd had and he'd certainly thought he'd lost. It was like somehow looking at everything he'd been as a boy and now was as a man... but also everything he had the potential to be. Like seeing himself through her-...

'_God, I love him so much it hurts.'_

Bella's voice rose up in his mind as if she'd whispered it in his ear, instantly gathering his meandering thoughts in a breathy caress.

'_We.'_

'_It's so weird, but I never understood the word before. It was a combination of two personal pronouns, but now... it's, like, something else altogether. He feels a part of me - like I dunno where I end and he begins.'_

'This _is what it feels like to be ... "we."'_

Jacob drew in a slow deep breath and watched the lips of that stranger on the pillow pop open eerily to do the same. With an odd sense of vertigo, he felt a warm weight draped over his chest rise and fall along with the field of vision as if that camera rested on his torso.

It was surreal.

'_Finally he's waking up. Missed him. No way I'm gonna tell him all that crap - he'll think I'm such a big fat sappy dork.'_

Bella's giggles tinkled through his mind like the echo of that spectral wind chime.

Frowning, he shook a head that felt like it weighed a million pounds, trying to break free from this strange limbo between waking and dream. Grimacing, that other Jake slowly did the same.

"Shh... It's okay," he heard her voice - soft and breathy - audibly this time. Long delicate fingers appeared in the purview of this hallucination at the same time a soft chant wound through his mind like a purring cat.

'_Missed him-love him-missed him.'_

Bella's fingers stroked tenderly down his cheek.

At the tactile sensation of skin on skin, Jacob's eyes popped open with a gasp.

"Bella," he choked, as his hands automatically grasped the small body that was already held tightly in an unconscious embrace.

He froze for a moment, soundly blinking - torn between the dream that still clung behind his open eyes and sheer awe at the most angelic vision he'd ever seen in his life:

_Bella. _

She was perched on his chest and staring back at him with a glorious smile curving dewy lips. A soft sunrise blush ripened her cheeks and her auburn hair spilled over her shoulders, catching sunlight like a halo.

She was _fucking beautiful. _

But as his eyes devoured her face like a starving man, his brow fell in confusion even as her own widening gaze locked with his.

"Your eyes!" they gasped in unison.

Jacob's head jerked up off the pillow as his hands slipped up to her jaw, gently holding her still as his eyes darted between hers. Those warm chocolate eyes were now a luminescent amber threaded with gold.

"Wh-what's wrong with them?" Bella whispered hoarsely, even her gaze paced frantically between his own.

"They're really light and gold... like... " his murmured words died on his tongue.

Bella's nostrils flared with her rising anxiety.

And instinctively Jacob switched his focus to his mind's eye - as he did so innately with his Pack - where he saw the matched and mated pair to her own peering out from under his furrowed brow.

And suddenly he understood.

"Wolf," he breathed.

His finger came up to touch her cheek in wonder while a gratified lupine howl sang through his bones - her eyes were the same human-wolf hybrid as his own now.

She was immutably a part of him and he of her.

And she was linked with him like Pack - _that's _what this hallucination was. He hadn't recognized it as Pack mind because it felt so vastly different. Instead of being one of the channels on that big-screen mental TV, it was as if she were a part of him. Like they were sitting side-by-side on the old log down on First Beach, wrapped in an embrace and watching the world go by together.

Suddenly Jacob understood why sex sealed the bond the way it did- it wasn't the physical act, it was the intimacy. Only at the moment where wolf and imprint were at their most vulnerable and open could their souls be united. With so many resultant changes already, no wonder it had knocked him on his ass.

But now, he could _feel _her.

And right now, she was upset - her little hands dug into his shoulders as her gaze flitted over his face and her mind spun..

'_What does it mean? My eyes look like this? They look like they did when the wolf...'_

_A lightning memory flickered through his mind of being nude and sitting in his lap, frightened and worried. She fearfully cried out his name and his eyes snapped open - a golden hybrid between man and beast, heart and soul. _

_Like a rollercoaster, the vision jerked to the sight of his self-abused thighs, accompanied by a swallowed sob that felt like a fist was squeezing her heart like a lump of raw meat._

Jacob fought to find equilibrium in the roiling seas of her anguish- she felt _so incredibly deeply. _

For him.

Anxiety was already pooling in those new copper and gold eyes. "Shhhh," he soothed, sitting up quickly- …

And the world lurched into a violent tailspin.

With a groan, Jacob brusquely caught his careening body on one elbow.

"Jake!" Bella squeaked, disengaging herself and crawling off his lap to crouch beside him.

Through their bond could see himself braced on his side against the mattress, his face contorted like he was in pain. He could _feel _her worry, roiling and caustic like acid.

"It's okay, honey," he croaked. "Jus' gimme minute." With his free arm, he reached out blindly and found her hand - needing the touch. She laced her small fingers through his and gave him much more.

Grounding. Strength. Reassurance.

Jacob drew in a deep breath through his nose and expelled it through his teeth as his world continued to spin. His limbs felt heavy and ungainly, but it wasn't an entirely unpleasant feeling. Truthfully he felt more solid, more whole than he ever had in his life, it just felt... well, weird.

And at the same time he was processing how different it felt to be unified in his body, his link to his Pack had whooshed back online with a roar. But that had changed as well - his tether didn't feel like the competing cameras jostling for attention as it normally did in his human form. It was more like the Pack mind when he was Phased.

When he was a wolf, the pack was somehow a more integrated whole - almost like an extension of himself. With just a flick of his mind's eye and he could slip into one of his wolves' minds like he was merely glancing into his own periphery.

Jacob tested it out and a soft laugh burst over his lips. There was a fucking huge field of vision alright because _every single one of them_ were phased and waiting. Just behind the treeline in the Swans' back yard, to be exact.

They'd felt it.

And hell, how could they not? That explosion of holocaust pleasure and power had been a million times more potent than his rage, and he'd seen the impact that fire had on his Pack - phased or human. They were standing sentry for their Alpha and his mate … and waiting for them.

All these thoughts flashed through his mind like lightning. Even his brain worked differently: efficiently, intuitively, instinctively.

He was whole.

Jacob drew in another breath as he stretched his mental muscles and acclimated to the new terrain.

"Jake," Bella's whispered tensely; she was nervous... _afraid_. She didn't want to see him fighting himself.

But he _wasn't _fighting. Not anymore.

His eyes popped open - spontaneously focused in hers- as his lips curved in a slow and savoring smile. She had _no fucking idea_ what a gift she was. But he was going to tell her.

Every single day of his life.

She blinked at his expression, some of the tension in her face dropping like rain as her lips _tried _to mirror his smile.

"It's okay," he soothed that anxiety that still crackled through her body like a live wire as he sat up and opened strong steady arms in invitation.

Bella hesitated only a second before she threw herself forward from her hands and knees. Jacob's arms caught her and pulled her tiny nude body back into into his lap, stifling his groan at the feel of her silken skin.

"In fact," he pulled her cheek to his heart as her arms encircled his chest. "It's _better _than okay, Bells. Way better."

Lupine power welled up effortlessly at his bidding as he wrapped her in his arms. He pressed his lips to her temple tenderly as he _felt _that frantic worry instantly dissipate in the warmth of his strength and the soothing hum of their bond.

_Holy shit. _He could _feel _her. He could feel how much pleasure and peace his simple touch brought her.

'_Please let him feel better... he seems_ _better. He _seems _okay...'_

"You're okay?" she mumbled into his chest, echoing her thoughts in the next second.

"Yeah," he breathed - still trying to acclimate to this connection with her. He'd had over a year to master the intricacies of Pack mind, but this was something totally different. It was like the fibers of her very being were inextricably knit with his.

Bella's parallel thoughts put it perfectly:

'_Oh God, I love him. We... this is what it was always supposed to be.''_

"Bella," he murmured, stroking his hand down her back in wonder and feeling the shudder shimmy up her spine and flutter in her belly like it was his own. "I can _feel _you... _hear _you," he breathed in awe.

She lifted her head from his chest and looked up - an endearingly earnest pucker between her brows over huge ethereal eyes.

"'We... this is what it was always supposed to be,'" he whispered through a soft smile.

She sucked in a sharp breath as she jerked back, bring her embrace with her. And, like the slam of a door, suddenly that lifeline was broken.

Stiffening at the jarring shock, his eyes darted over that deer-in-headlights stare as she wrapped her arms uncomfortably over those perfect breasts. Even without that preternatural connection he still knew her as well as himself: she was confused... and embarrassed.

Jacob licked his lips as his hand reached out to caress her cheek... at her flinch, he froze.

He wouldn't even pretend even that the subtle rejection didn't hurt like a bitch, but he understood. She was overwhelmed and that sharp little mind needed a moment to process. He let his hand fall back to the bed and he waited.

Bella squeezed her elbows tighter to her sides - still _unfortunately _covering those breasts - and nibbled on an invisible hangnail for a moment.

"You can read my mind like that psychic Pack thingy?" she ventured, returning that finger to her mouth and biting the hell out of it.

"Pack mind," he corrected with an easy smile. He'd go for casual and reassuring - hell, it had been a shock to his system too last year. "_But.._" he paused with a theatrical quirk of his brow. "You just shut me down."

She frowned in confusion, but pulled that finger out her mouth. "I did?"

"Yup," he bunched his lips humorously to one side. The indignant pout was only partially a joke: he wanted her back. Just a few moments of bathing in the nurturing warmth of her being and Jacob was already hopelessly addicted.

She stared at him suspiciously for a moment but he could feel she was incrementally relaxing.

Jacob gave her that lopsided smile that she seemed to like and tentatively reached out to her again.

This time she collapsed easily back against his chest and his arms encircled her happily. "So that means that you've got some kinda natural kick-ass control - like I do."

"What does that mean?" she asked. She rearranged her arms so they were pinned between them and snuggled into his chest.

"None of the Pack can read me unless I want them to." The words came out on a contented sigh as he leaned his cheek on her head. _Fuck, she felt so good. _

"How do you control it?" she mumbled, instantly sounding just as intoxicated as he was feeling. But as she relaxed into their bond, little wisps of thoughts started curling back into his mind.

'_freaky... scary... cool... he'll think I'm stupid.'_

"I'll never think you're stupid, Bells," he murmured.

She stiffened in his arms and immediately that iron door slammed back down.

Jacob sighed softly. He understood how weird this must be for her. But once she got used to it, she'd understand it for the precious gift it was... like he already did.

His new integrated mind had already charted all the strategic benefits: he'd never have to worry where she was or if she were in danger, he'd be connected with her and thus home base and the humans of the Pack when they were on a kill, he could have all the benefits of that astute, observant mind when he was leading - even at a Council meeting, and the list went on.

But for all the tactical advantages that were important to his Alpha mind and lupine instinct, the most important was the gift to his human heart. To know her like this - how she felt, what she thought - it was a staggering blessing from a Spirit that had already given him more than he deserved in her.

But he'd had over a year to get used to sharing his mind... it would take time for her to adjust her concept of privacy and acclimate to all the little idiosyncratic quirks of such an intimate connection.

But Jacob had, and always would, give her what she needed.

He picked his cheek up, kissing the top of her head on the way. "Honey," he whispered.

She pressed her face more soundly into his chest.

"Heyyy," he crooned, as he brought his hand around to gently petition her chin up. "It's just me, Bells." He met her confused eyes with a reassuring smile. "And you don't have to share anything you don't wanna because I'm gonna teach you how to control it."

She blinked at him a few times as he watched the thoughts churn behind those beautiful eyes. Frankly this change in color was striking in her face. Her eyes drew you in like a magnet - huge anyway, they were haunting with that prismatic copper and gold. Luckily they were just teetering on the edges of the plausibly human to be chalked up to awesome genetics (or contacts) from a normal distance. But up close he could see the way the power of their connection subtly heated that gold to fire.

"How come _I _can't hear _you_?" Bella accused suddenly, pulling back with a telltale purse to her lips. That stubborn little temper was about to make a show.

"_That's_ not fair."

Jacob tried to smother his smile. She was so cute when she got all pissy at injustice.

"Maybe you _can_," he raised his brow. "It's that Alpha thing - I keep my shit covered most of the time."

Especially, _instinctively _so when his entire Pack was phased and now whining and pacing restlessly in the woods behind her house (he left that part out). One thing at a time.

"Put it down," Bella's demanded petulantly with an impertinent slap to his pec.

Jacob's machismo congealed in a cocky smirk at her tone.

Bella rolled her eyes. "I guess that macho-thing's still the same," she muttered out of the side of her mouth.

Jacob barked an easy laugh which was quickly sucked into an awed gasp.

"It's gone," he breathed - finally having the bandwidth to really take in her body. His fingers reached up to ghost over her unblemished arm.

Bella's face jerked to one side and then the other. "Wow," she breathed.

Jacob pulled her into him as he looked over her shoulder and a palm smoothed up her flawless creamy back. He sat back up with an unencumbered smile.

"This shit's awesome sometimes," he grinned.

'_That smile... missed it... God, it's good to see him like this.'_

Jacob's smile impossibly broadened as he basked in the warmth of her pleasure while snatches of her thoughts sparkled through his mind in nurturing pyrotechnics, painting his skies with wonder. He now had proof that that heart and mind were as kind and loving as her eyes had always been - he could _feel _that gentle, accepting presence in the flickering connection that slipped through her callow walls.

She just unapologetically stared at him for a moment and he stared right on back.

But his smile slowly evaporated - the face that shimmered in his mind's eye looked _nothing _like the way he saw himself. How could she possibly see him like this? Even after all that had happened?

Being loved by Bella was a gift that eclipsed the blinding pain and betrayal of his own body when his humanity had been violently stripped from him 15 months ago. It soothed the open wounds gouged into his heart by all he had witnessed and all he'd been forced to do by duty's merciless hand. It was a fucking gift he'd never be able to repay.

And didn't deserve.

His focus returned to her eyes and he found them watching him sadly and melting to liquid amber. She reached out to cup his jaw in both hands as she leaned forward and brushed her lips tenderly over his - satin on silk.

"_When you gonna love you as much as I do, Jacob?' _ The words were as loud as if she'd spoken them.

With a soft inhale he pulled back a few inches and found those ethereal eyes - unadorned and somber - staring up at him.

"Did you hear that?" she whispered, her breath fanning, sweet and warm, over his lips.

Jacob swallowed and nodded infinitesimally - his heart was climbing up his throat and choking him with emotion and he desperately tried to blink away that incriminating burn. He had no fucking clue what to say or do - she was right here, so close. After all he'd been through - _she'd _been through - she was still right here.

Choosing him.

Loving him.

It was overwhelming - even to a blue-blooded Alpha.

But, as usual, Bella knew that.

"Good," she whispered as a slow and mischievous smile bloomed on those mismatched lips. "Maybe this isn't so bad after all. I _finally _have a way to get through that freaking thick head of yours."

Jacob's lips curved and he sniffed an appreciative laugh. That girl was a fucking professional at towing him to shore from his turbulent seas.

His hands slipped up to her jaw and he leaned in and placed a soft melting kiss over her lips. "Bells" he sighed and helped himself to another taste of summer strawberries.

As she relaxed against him, that natural mental guard slowly lowered and Jacob was submerged again in heated honey and fucking heaven.

Her desire melted in his mouth like meringue and he dove deeper into that sweet viscous want. She groaned into his mouth as her hands climbed his shoulders to press her chest against his as she fervently met and raised his heat.

Jacob's arm swept down to scoop her up and readjust her body to accommodate for an instantly rock-hard 'n ready body. She felt _so fucking good_ to him and he could _feel _that he felt the same way to her.

In fact, he was pretty sure he could cum just by kissing her with her running open like this. Feeling the way his mouth stoked her rising ardor and his touch made her body blossom with want- open and yearning. It was driving him insane.

He needed her. _Now_.

Without a thought - or breaking the kiss- he was effortlessly lifting her up so he could plunge into that little body and quench the ache in his throbbing dick.

A distressed howl exploded outside and made Bella jump in his arms, breaking both the kiss and their connection with a squeak of fear.

He didn't even think about it.

Instinctively Jacob reached out to Seth who'd momentarily lost himself under the stress and yanked his wolf back under control. That plaintive cry was instantly silenced.

His eyes popped open in surprise... _how?_

But Bella was staring back at him with an exaggerated startle rounding her eyes. His focus instantly snapped to his mate as his brow furrowed in concern.

"Shh," he crooned, pulling her to his chest and settling her in his lap - his body's need quickly forgotten for her own. No matter what external bruises had been healed by preternatural magic, there were some kinds of damage that could only be healed by time. She'd been through major trauma over the last two days.

Suddenly it hit him that only seconds ago he'd been _seconds away_ from mindlessly taking what his body craved and he was ashamed. He needed to be more vigilant: this was a new playing field with new rules. That feral instinct was now inseparably part and parcel of who he was, not some external force to be tamed. He was going to have to consciously rein himself in.

"V-vampires?" Bella quavered into his chest.

"No honey," he soothed, wrapping his arms tightly around her little body and cocooning her in heat and security. "It's just the Pack. They felt the change and they're ramped up and waiting."

Bella's head jerked up with a stricken expression that made Jacob swallow his chuckle. "They know we had sex?" she squeaked.

Jacob grimaced apologetically. "Well they know that _I'm _different so..."

"They probably figured it out," she groaned, collapsing her forehead back to his shoulder.

Jacob didn't bother telling her that they'd _always _know because her body was now saturated with his scent as it would always be from here on out (even for a fully integrated Alpha, some things were just non-negotiable).

One thing at a time.

But just that - her scent so inextricably woven with his mark - soothed some deep primal part of him and stoked a soft gratified rumble in his gut. She was his - but that sentiment ran deeper than those simple territorial pronouncements of "mine" before they'd sealed their bond. She was his mate, his other half.

Bella was right, it was hard to explain: We.

"How are you different?" she picked her head up suddenly and regarded him with a furrow between her brow. Apparently that curiosity trumped mortification- it was probably a good thing.

"I mean other than your eyes and reading my mind and stuff," she drawled, with a humorously dismissive flourish of her hand.

Jacob chuckled and pulled her down onto the bed with him, rolling them over on their sides so she wasn't subjected to his hard demanding body. He propped his head in his hand and brushed some of that sexy sex-rumpled hair out of her face while she blinked up at him, patiently waiting.

"I stopped fighting," he stated simply. "I'm whole, Bella."

Bella's face lit in a heartbreakingly beautiful smile. "Yaayy," she breathed, reaching up to cup his cheek in her palm.

Jacob nuzzled into it while he held her gaze. That smile turned private as her gaze was drawn down to his lips - and he wished to high hell he could hear what was going on behind those eyes.

Her palm left his jaw as her her fingers began tenderly strumming over the topography of his face. Leisurely tracing his cheekbone, hopping up to skate over his brow then slipping down his nose to tiptoe over his lips while her thoughtful eyes followed her fingers.

His lips curved in a cherishing smile as his gaze paced between those new striking eyes. He had half a mind to ask her what she was thinking... but it was only half, and Jacob had always known when to wait. So, instead, he luxuriated in the caring brush of her fingers and the intimate warmth of her full attention. She always gave it all.

"So it's better?" she checked quietly, her eyes darting up to his even while her fingers continued their lazy caress.

"Fucking tons," he grinned.

Her smile grew roots and sparkled in her eyes. "How's it different?"

Jacob drew in a thoughtful breath as his gaze darted off to the side. "Um," he rolled his lips and returned to her eyes. "I feel solid. It's all a part of me now: the wolf, Alpha, man... _you_," he raised his brow with a smile.

Her fingers stilled on his cheek while a soft blush warmed her cheeks.

"I mean, you feel this, right?" he whispered as his hand traced a slow sultry trail over her shoulder.

"How could I not?" she shivered as chill bumps sprinted away from his fingertip. "You're right here, Jake," she declared passionately as her hand flew to her heart. "I mean, I _feel _you."

Shaking his head slowly in disbelief at what a fucking lucky bastard he was, his hand smoothed down to rest possessively at the small of her back.

"I feel you too, honey," he whispered. "But you're doing an awesome job with that control. I can't hear you anymore."

A slow wry smile quirked her lips as she reached out to trace his jaw with a single finger. "I'm figuring it out," she murmured, with a shrewd lift to her brow.

"Quick study," he sniffed a laugh.

"Alpha's mate," she quipped, pinching his chin. "I gotta keep up."

Jacob licked his lips. "I kinda miss it," he admitted with a squint, pulling her in closer.

Bella's eyes darted between his for a moment, hesitating. Then she tipped her head up and pressed her lips to his chin. "I'll show you mine if you show me yours," she whispered breathily around a smile.

Even though she was just being a smart-ass, his eyelids fluttered with the wash of heat that made his dick jump and balls ache. Holy shit, when she figured out just how much power she had over him, he was toast.

Bella had pulled back and was guilelessly biting her lip while she watched his face and patiently waited for her answer.

_Fucking scrumptious_.

His nostrils flared with the effort it took not to just jump her now and talk later - and if he was going to let down his guard he'd better have this shit under control. He hardly wanted her first glimpse into his mind to be what was running through it right now.

"Okay," he smoothed her hair back from her face, distracting himself and pushing down that insatiable appetite he had for her body.

Jacob steeled himself and closed his eyes, trying to figure out how to let her in without exposing her to the pandemonium that was Pack mind. It was far more organized now in his new and improved brain, but even as a wolf it had taken him a month before he was able to effectively parse through the chaos of clamoring emotions and thoughts.

_Ahh, maybe like this..._

It was like having warm blackstrap molasses drizzled all over her: dark, viscous, virile, sweet.

Bella's eyes fluttered closed as she slipped over onto her back and Jacob's big hand dragged along her waist. The feel of his essence poured lazily over her was an indescribable sensation.

He felt just like she'd always known him to be: giving, loving, patient. Yet swirled into that sweetness, like coffee into cream, was the bitter unapologetic strength of a confident man. Embellished with a spicy wildness and a mystical note of something arcane, she could feel how all parts of him had seamlessly coalesced into one - creating pure perfection as far as Bella was concerned.

'_Can you hear me?' _

His voice was somehow inside her head! It took her a moment to adjust to the sheer freakiness of it.

'_Bells?'_

"Mm hmm," she quickly hummed. She could have opened up and tried to meet him in this strange dreamland, but she wanted to take all this slow. Or as slow as she could.

Figuring out how to put up her walls and keep them there had been easy enough by observing her own mind and his reactions. Maybe it was something to do with what made her unreadable to Edward, or maybe it was part of their bond, but it was kind of nice for something to come easy for a change. When she'd strummed her fingers over his face and mentally asked him to make love to her... and he'd just gazed into her eyes with a gorgeous (and clueless) smile.

That's when she knew she had it down.

It wasn't that she didn't see this as the crazy-cool, weird and wonderful gift that it was. The kind of intimacy they could have now was mind-blowing. Yet it was also not so different from what they'd always had.

So it wasn't that she was scared or ungrateful, it's just that things had been moving so fast. She knew Jake had always had her heart on some level. But in a little over a week she'd given him her soul and shared her body too.

And it was fabulous and terrifying and as easy as breathing... all at the same time.

But usually Bella liked to take her time. She was a practical girl, a sensible girl. Okay, so she was a little neurotic sometimes too. But all things considered, she thought she was doing pretty damn good.

'_Me too,' _Jacob's voice chuckled through her mind sending shivers down her spine.

She quickly battened down her hatches again. "How much did you hear?" she grumbled.

"Just something about being neurotic," he answered her in his soothing bass. "But I think you're doing _awesome_ honey."

Bella's eyes popped open to see him still leaning on his palm his face utterly relaxed like he was asleep.

'Close your eyes,' his voice wove through her mind.

"How did you know?" she complained, obliging him anyway - his eyes were still closed!

"Your breathing changed," he chuckled.

Bella sniffed. The man _was _scary-good.

His hand brushing over her stomach quickly pulled her back under his sublime seas. His fingers began caressing up her side like whisper, as images started to bloom behind her eyelids.

Bella was enchanted; to see the way he saw the world even once was priceless.

_Behind her eyes bloomed the image of the most beautiful woman in the world wrapped in a cream sheet as she pulled the corner of her lip into her mouth with endearing nerves. The crashing waves of blistering lust slammed into her, followed by a desperate and crushing restraint. _

"That's not me," Bella choked.

'_It is,' _that voice in her mind was like soothing murmur of the sea. _'That's what you look like to me.' _

That image rolled into another:

_Again herself - but not- standing in only her panties and a pool of linen while he knelt before her and his gaze worshiped every inch of perfection._

Bella squirmed uncomfortably. His tender palm soothed her, stopping over her heart before continuing on with a slow hypnotic caress that made it so she could do nothing but melt.

He continued to brush over her skin while he showed her flashes of memory after memory:

_On the beach - her tears crushing his heart, her kiss inflating it again. _

_In Emily's house beside a broken Brady - having held the whole Pack together - and how much he'd burned to pull her into his arms. _

_In the garage, brave and strong and how hard he'd fought against himself but had come so frighteningly close to losing it. _

_The kinder, simpler days of last summer, sitting on the porch side by side. He'd wanted to kiss her so badly but he was scared of losing her altogether if she said no. He pulled her into his side with a forced sunny smile instead. _

_Long lonely autumns and springs - even with plenty of friends. _

_Bonfires and tree houses. _

_Riding bikes, mudpies, playing in the sand. _

_All those tumbling memories came to an abrupt halt in one image: her eyes. In her yard last week, that fateful look into her eyes had pulled all those years together in an obdurate fist with a single burning mandate:_

_** Mine**. _

_With a lurch, the scene careened like a runaway train to __a forest with __Jacob on hands and knees violently retching. 'Not Bella. __My __Bella. '_

_That memory reeled into another: his kitchen, dark with despair. "She might be what's been missin'. It could be a good thing," she heard Billy Black's dusky murmur._

_"For who? !" Jacob whipped around to glare at his father, concern carving the man's face with shadow. "For Bella? !" he roared. "Do you think she wants to be shackled to this!" He thrust his fist into his chest with a hollow boom that was echoed outside by thunder. "I'm a fucking animal-..."_

That image was abruptly cut off with an air of desperation by random flickering thoughts rising up like white noise.

Bella's eyes popped open with a gasp. Jacob's eyes were still closed but that calm, easy expression had been etched with pain.

"Jake," she whispered, the sob in her voice taking her by surprise.

His eyes snapped open, instantly focused in her own.

"Whoa," Bella moaned as she squeezed her eyes closed on the sickening vertigo of double vision: what she saw and what he saw … both at the same time.

Like the receding tide, that delicious warmth quickly withdrew leaving her high and dry in her own mind. And empty. She sucked in a slow breath trying to orient herself.

The feather touch on her cheek had her eyelids fluttering open to his aching concern.

"You okay?" he whispered as his knuckles tenderly stroked over her cheek. "I'm sorry," he murmured as his gaze fell to his fingers which were now tracing the trail of wetness over her temple. "I didn't mean for you to see that."

Bella suddenly realized she was silently crying. But how could she not when each memory was filled with such heartbreaking love... and pain.

He loved her. He'd always loved her. So much so that after this year of hell, the imprint had almost hopelessly shattered even such a tough and resilient man. He'd been suffering so long alone.

"Jacob," she breathed, reaching out to ghost her fingers lovingly over his cheek. "Show me more."

He pressed his lips together and shook his head slowly as his gaze followed his fingers as they wiped away the other track of her tears.

Bella audibly swallowed as her hand searched out his and she interlaced their fingers. Everything felt _so much_. She could _feel _his heart aching ...as well as her own.

And here is where she could help him. Finally.

Words were such flimsy hollow things; completely ineffectual for something like this. So she closed her eyes and brought their clasped fists up to her lips.

Opening her mind, she wrapped him in love - serene and sure. As she placed gentle kisses on each of his knuckles she showed him her own version of those memories - each one laced with the ache of longing and tormenting worry.

She showed him the depths of her heart and the heights of her craving and ended with a single perfect moment: a thrust of his hips. And she was gasping against his shoulder with the delirious pleasure laced with the pain of a virgin body... and the wonder of finally being whole.

Suddenly his fervent lips were on hers at the same time his floodgates opened and his essence surged over her, thick and heavy and sweet like heated caramel. Their hands unclasped and her arm wrapped around his back to beg him closer at the same time he was gathering her in his arms. His body rolled onto hers, pinning her down with that delicious weight.

As he poured himself all over her her, Bella luxuriantly arched up into that warmth and suckled dark chocolate kisses from his mouth. She could feel him, feeling her, feeling him...sensation and passion intertwined inseparably, igniting like coals to a slow incinerating burn.

'Ohmygod,' her mind searched for traction.

'S'okay, Bells,' he soothed in mental cashmere as his lips seamlessly started pressing hot open-mouthed kisses along her jaw.

She moaned as she instinctively turned her head away, pressing her neck yearningly into that hot demanding mouth. He answered her in one of those low inhuman rumbles.

Suddenly two strident howls tore through Bella's impassioned haze. Her body jolted as her eyes flew open. At the same time, both of them snapped back into their own minds with the startled sting of a rubber band.

That rumble ripped into a snarl as Jacob picked up his head and glared out the window. The wolves' cries were instantly snipped into silence.

"What's going on, Jake?" Bella whispered, frowning up at where he was still glowering outside.

He pressed his lips together and turned back to her with a residual scowl. "It's like having fucking kids," he growled.

A smile curved her lips and quickly bloomed into a smothered chuckle.

Jacob's mouth twitched as he rolled his eyes and rolled off of her at the same time.

Grinning now, Bella turned onto her side as he settled on his back with a petulant huff.

"They're all sitting in the the woods out back, waiting..." he very nearly pouted, shoving his hands through his hair while he glared at the ceiling.

Bella's giggles finally broke free at his expense as she absently glanced over her shoulder at the window. "Really? Why?"

She turned back and that serious expression instantly wiped the humor from her face.

"Everything's changed, Bella," he breathed. "When I change, it changes the Pack. I never really got that until now..."

Her forehead fell in concern. "So it's a bad-..."

"No!" he quickly interrupted as his hand automatically reached out to lace with hers. He pulled their fists to his chest. "It's fucking _awesome_. They all feel it... we're whole. They just need to reconnect."

Bella arched a quizzical brow and Jacob smiled.

"Wolves are all about touch," he whispered, raising their entwined hands meaningfully. "They need to see us, _touch_ us."

"Touch _us_," she asked quietly.

He nodded, holding her gaze. "They need to reconnect with you too …especially after..." the words died on his tongue.

Bella's eyes dipped down as she pulled her lip into her mouth as her heart stuttered with a flash of memory. There was still so much to be fixed.

"We're gonna need to talk about this soon, honey," he murmured, releasing her hand and snaking his palm under her hair to the nape of her neck. He gently pulled her down as her arm wrapped slithered over that broad chest and she settled her cheek over his heart.

"We're gonna have to go at him fast and hard, because I think he's gonna give up on fucking Cullen and try another plan," he stroked his fingers through her hair soothingly. "And we don't want that," he breathed.

Bella squeezed his rib cage as bit her lip. She didn't want him in danger. She didn't know if she could handle it.

But as if he could sense her stress - he probably could - he wrapped his big warm arms around her and just held for for several breaths.

"But all that can wait... for a little," he whispered as his hand stroked down her spine. "Right now is for us."

Bella blinked several times as she stared over the rolling plain of his chest to the teak nipple on the horizon.

"First take care of our Pack," she pronounced quietly. She didn't say "his," she didn't say "the," she said "our" because in the marrow of her being she now knew that to be true.

Jacob - of course- noticed and his hand froze at the small of her back.

Bella picked up her head to catch a vulnerable softness to his eyes before it was quickly shuttered away. Oh, he wasn't going to be able to get away with that for long.

But she didn't call him on it but simply repeated herself: "Take care of our Pack, Jake."

A slow smile bloomed on those sensual lips, showing his front teeth.

"Do we need to go downstairs or something? Do you need to phase?" she prompted, trying her best to support him with something she knew next to nothing about.

Jacob picked his head off the bed and placed a smacking kiss on her lips before flopping back down, his smile turning into a grin. 'You're fucking awesome."

Bella flicked her eyes up in uncomfortable deflection.

Jacob chuckled and pulled her up more onto his chest, loosely looping his heavy arms around her back. "How 'bout I buy us another hour. Then we can meet up at Sam's with the Council."

Bella did her best to ignore the spike of anxiety at the prospect. "How 'you gonna do that?" she asked, pulling herself past the inherent nerves of another show-down with a dour group of Elders. But Billy was Chief now, right? It had to be different.

"Just gonna shore 'em up with a little mojo and send them each off with a task," he smirked. "That's the secret - keep 'em busy."

Bella pursed her lips with an appreciative nod - she could appreciate that. _And _it affirmed that her technique at redirecting _him _was headed in the right direction. Every time he talked about his wolves she took judicious notes for her own Jake-arsenal - she could be kinda sneaky like that. When it counted - and Jacob always would.

"So you're gonna phase?" she asked hesitantly, wondering if it was a good idea in the house but secretly wanting to see his wolf again for some strange reason (though that hardly registered on her skewed scale).

"Nope," he popped the 'P' with a gratified smirk. "New and improved Jake can do it from the comfort of his own bed."

"_My_ bed," Bella corrected with mock frown.

"We're gonna have to talk about that," he arched a warning brow.

Bella diffused him with a giggle and placed a bright kiss to his chest. "So, you couldn't do that before?"

He pursed his lips with an absent shake of head. "I could always _hear _'em when they were phased, but I'd have to talk to the Pack through another wolf like a fucking tin can on a string," he snorted.

Bella laughed freely and Jacob's indignation melted into a smile.

"But now it seems like I can …" he paused, his brow furrowing and Bella's humor evaporated in rapt attention.

"It's more like it used to be when..." his words were halting as his eyes darted thoughtfully off to the side. "Like when I was phased, but I can't _talk_ exactly. It's more like I can _push_... or feel … or..."

"It's more visceral?" Bella provided.

Jacob's eyes cut over with a wry smile. "Whatever that means," he muttered.

Bella chuckled. "Like it's an instinctual full-body kinda thing?"

"Yeeaahhh," he breathed with an appreciative nod. "That's it... an' I jus' gotta figure it out a little more."

Bella crawled up his chest and pressed her lips to his, pulling back to hover over him. She took advantage of the moment to catalog his face. Those new light eyes looked riveting - and very sexy - set in his dusky complexion.

"How about you do that and I'll take a shower?" she whispered.

"A shower, huh?" he murmured as his hands smoothed down her back to cup her butt.

Bella wrinkled her nose. "I'm all sticky."

"Hmm," he pretended to think about it a moment while he absently kneaded. "I think that would be my cum, Bells," he said in a feigned conversational tone.

Bella choked, heat rushing to her cheeks while Jacob's lips stretched into an impish grin. Something about her nickname so casually proffered on his lips in the same sentence as-... Well, it sent a zing straight down to her crotch and knit together the reality of just how much had changed at the same time.

Best friends to lovers. And seamlessly into mates.

Speaking of bodily fluids, her gaze darted to the other side of the bed and rusty blood stain on the edge, trails of it all over the crisp cream. _Gross._

Her shoulders fell with an annoyed huff. "And blood," she sighed. "My sheets."

Jacob turned his head and glanced over the plain of the mattress and then made a point of taking a deep luxuriant whiff.

"_God_ that smells good," he groaned on a satisfied exhale as he turned back to her, with an intoxicated smile.

And complete unconcern for her linens.

"Ja-ake, they were brand new," she complained melodramatically with an unenthusiastic slap to his chest.

"Awww," he pursed his lips in mock sympathy. "I'll buy you another one," he mimicked her whine - which sounded pretty funny in that macho bass.

Bella laughed. _It felt so freaking awesome to see him like this. _

"Or better yet, you can just sleep on mine from here on out," he wiggled his brow with a humorous leer.

Bella grimaced. "Have you _seen _your room, Jacob?" she scoffed.

There was a flash of rejection in his eyes - a glimmer of hurt, gone as soon as she'd seen it. He'd only been halfway teasing. And it was the second time he'd brought it up: what happened after this?

"So good thing I got all that practice with the rest of your house," she teased gently - soothing that inadvertent sting- as she leaned down to place a soft kiss on his lips.

She tried to pull back away but he followed her, lifting his head off the bed. One of his hands glided up her back, gathering her hair before cupping her head. And he pressed her into the grateful caress of his sultry mouth.

When she was breathless, he released her, both of his palms smoothing down her sides with a delicious covetousness. Panting softly, Bella smiled into his eyes as her tongue ran over her swollen lips, licking off the last delectable drops of him.

"Are you sore," he asked in a quiet dusky voice that sent shivers down her spine.

Bella took stock - no, she actually wasn't. Not at all. The bruising wasn't the only thing that had preternaturally healed.

Biting her lip, she shook her head slowly. Her paltry attempt at seductive was swindled by the damn blush that rushed to her cheeks.

Jacob's smile tilted wry as his hand slipped down to her hips. "That's good to know," he crooned, as his pelvis bucked up slowly, pushing the tip of his hard body right where she wanted it in a cruel tease.

Bella groaned and collapsed her forehead to the mattress by his head.

Jacob's throaty chuckle was positively devilish and it only made that tightness in her belly worse.

"Mmm," he hummed, turning his head with the soft whisper of sheets and nuzzling into her hair. "Take that shower honey," he breathed, all sweltry and low. "I'll take care of the mutts then we'll have an hour..." he left the end of that sentence dangling into the provocative as he rolled them fluidly onto their sides.

But Bella pulled back to find his amber-gold eyes watching her closely. His embrace slowly slipped away - his hands taking the opportunity to absently roam - and she held his gaze for a moment searching those complex eyes.

All at once he was aroused and loving and strategizing and worrying and probably working out the new lines to his Pack. She could _feel _it and see it in his eyes. There was so much resting on those broad shoulders - but he didn't need to do it alone anymore.

"Love you," she whispered.

A smile broke through that intensity like the sun on a cloudy day. "Love you more," he quipped automatically, reverting from a mad-skills Alpha to being freaking 12 in a heartbeat.

"Gah," Bella rolled her eyes and promptly turned over and swung her legs over the side of the bed. "I _thought_ you read my mind," she grumbled, rubbing her palms on her face and trying to switch tracks. Her body was still revved and ready to go.

She felt a single finger trace down her spine and she arched into her shudder.

"I feel your love Bella," he whispered, all teasing peeled back from cold stone sober.

She whipped around and was instantly pinned by that piercing stare.

"And it's such a gift," he breathed looking intensely into her eyes even while his finger continued leisurely riding the rail of her spine. "It's_ such a fucking gift_."

Bella was pretty sure her heart had stopped beating - so much was encompassed in those simple words and steady eyes.

At that his hand drew back to prop under his head and he just wordlessly held her gaze - each second just pounding his point home a little more.

"You're a gift too, Jacob," she whispered, her brow furrowing with sincerity.

He neither agreed or denied, but the corner of his mouth lifted in a subtle wry smile, making no attempts to release her from those compelling eyes.

The intimacy of the moment was suffocating.

With a jerk of his chin toward the bathroom, Jacob effectively broke the spell.

Bella blinked and then turned back around, snapping her head back into the game. Oh, this was going to be the fastest freaking shower in history.

She stood, her forearms automatically scrunching up to her chest. It was silly, she knew - since he'd both seen and _licked _nearly every inch of her - but she still felt uncomfortable being naked. She crossed her room self-consciously, feeling his stare following her like shadow. She glanced hesitantly over her shoulder as she stopped beside the discarded sheet.

His head propped on one arm - highlighting it's ridiculous bulk - his appreciative eyes were making no bones about raking up and down her body like he owned her. It should have felt degrading or something but it... wasn't.

Hell, it was _Jake_ and he really kinda did anyway. In a good kind of way.

And she had the same rights, didn't she? With a little less gall her gaze ran over his long athletic _gorgeous _body stretched shamelessly over her bed, his erection proudly standing at attention over his stomach. Her blood couldn't decide whether it wanted to rush to her cheeks or between her legs so it settled on splitting up and covering both bases.

She quickly jerked her eyes back to his and the safety zone. And with one hand still over her breasts she stooped to pick up the sheet. Straightening, she wrapped it around her body.

Jacob's gaze darted up to hers and a gentle smile softened his lips. He thought she was being silly too, but he was going to let her get away with it.

"I'm gonna find a way to outlaw sheets," he grumbled.

But apparently not for long.

Bella pursed her lips and theatrically tucked it over her breasts with a stubborn lift of her chin. Jacob chuckled richly from the bed as she made a point of sashaying prissly toward the door.

A giggle escaped at how silly she was being and she threw a smile of shared humor over her shoulder as her hand found the knob. The expression on his face stopped her cold...

...and he made no attempt to change it.

The humor died on her lips as her eyes washed over his soft smile and shining liquid eyes: he was _happy_. For that moment, he was _truly_ and _totally_ _happy_.

And he loved her with everything he had.

Pointedly holding her gaze, he silently mouthed the words: "thank you."

Bella's overflowing heart bled into her smile and she nodded self-consciously and turned back to pull open the door.

"Oh!" She caught herself in the doorway, turning over her shoulder... to find his eyes pinned appreciatively to her butt.

"Do you need me to leave it open?" she asked, ignoring the rush of heat to her cheeks.

Jacob's eyes leisurely trailed up from their target to her eyes. That roguish smile hitched up a side of his mouth and he shrugged. "Don't matter now," he murmured. " I can _feel _you."

Bella nodded with a happy smile. She could feel him too - like a current running between them.

She turned back to the bathroom.

"But Bella? Don't lock it."

That sultry croon, full of suggestive promise, instantly liquified her insides to pool between her thighs. Bella smiled to herself as she crossed the hallway. She paused in the bathroom doorway, turning her cheek just enough to whisper to that preternatural ear:

"Now why in the world would I lock it, Jacob Black?"

'

* * *

'

_Review if you like._


	16. Silence

Oh, and if you're trying to get a visual on "amber" eyes:

Kristen has them and Tayjayfan found a pic that is exactly how I see Jake in this - complete with glowing light eyes! (see both in this album -KS actually looks like a nice person!): plusDOTgoogleDOTcom/photos/112163073516571740999/albums/5775097509801337585

As always, hugs and kisses to Tayjayfan for the preread.

'

Thanks for reading and hope you enjoy.

'

* * *

**Chapter 16 - Silence**

* * *

'

Bella gasped as she braced her palms against the cool, grounding formica. For several moments she could only stare back at the person reflected in the bathroom mirror.

She leaned closer as she turned her face slowly from one side to the other and a shocked hand came up to touch her cheekbone - just to make sure it was really her. Her mud brown eyes (as she'd called them) were now lightened to an exotic amber, thinly ringed with a remnant nutmeg. She leaned closer to the mirror as a pucker appeared between her brow - with subtle irised streaks of gold.

They were hypnotic ...and _just like Jake's._

She jerked back with a soft inhale as her arm snaked around her roiling stomach. It was probably motion sickness - Bella wasn't used to moving this fast. The last week finally caught up with her in the undeniable proof staring back at her in the mirror. Because it wasn't just the supernatural peering out from under that furrowed brow - Bella had changed.

Completely.

Staring back at her with a sensual flush heating her cheeks and lips swollen from loving was no longer a girl, but a woman. Those new piercing eyes had aged a decade at least and had the somber steadiness of a survivor. Someone who clearly knew that the world could be both a dangerous and cruel place.

She understood a little better how Jacob had felt last year. Keeping her arm wound securely around her waist, she leaned toward the mirror again.

But yet...

Yet they _also _sizzled with a fiery human hope alongside that supernatural gold. And not the childish naive type, but the kind stoked by strength and determination enkindled from the coals of faith.

Yes, they were a truly _woman's _eyes: a woman who - even in the midst of heartache, violence and frightening unknowns -had _chosen love_.

Her arm tentatively loosened around her middle as Bella drew her lip into her mouth and cocked her head at her reflection.

Staring back at her was the face of Jacob's _girlfriend _now. That was another huge transformation, but it was also one that had been surprisingly as natural as her next breath.

And as necessary.

The step from best friends to lovers had been effortless - in large part due to the fact that Jacob had been so confident, so sure, so... _freaking amazing_. Memories washed over her of smooth caramel skin, strong gentle hands, the controlled power of his touch, the fire behind each thrust...

Her eyelashes fluttered rapidly as she watched her cheeks redden with the heat that charged up her body like wildfire.

Oh, she wanted more of _that_.

She could definitely admit that even - if she were being honest - she was still feeling pretty insecure about sex. She, the eternally hopeless klutz, had always been envious about how easily anything physical came to Jacob. From the exacting to the athletic - wood carving to beachside acrobatics to football to fixing cars - Jacob was gifted and intense. Any new skill seemed to blossom into fluency instantly. With that huge, competent, _gorgeous _body, it was no wonder Bella was still a little intimidated about being his girlfriend.

When she thought about it, that is.

Because when she didn't, it kind of felt like it was what they'd always been - just a younger more innocent version (without the sex). In hindsight she couldn't believe they'd ignored it so long. She supposed that's what her father and Billy had been chuckling about all along.

She doubted her father was laughing now.

"Ugh," Bella groaned, slapping her palm over her eyes.

Facing her father was going to _suck_. She didn't even want to know what he'd been told to keep him from storming over here with gun in hand. Shotgun, that is. The clock on her nightstand had said 1:55 pm - "plausible deniability" had expired hours ago.

She sniffled as her hand fell to her side... and then grimaced, panning the bathroom. _What was that smell?_

Suddenly mortified, she brought her palm to her mouth and huffed a breath. That wasn't it. She hesitantly sniffed under arms...no. _Thank God!_

Deciding to brush her teeth anyway, she turned on the shower to warm it up and then returned to the sink to grab her toothbrush. All while her neat, ordered mind tried to file away a mountain of new emotions, realities and prospects.

Bella was a planner. It was probably a survival mechanism courtesy of a chaotic and unpredictable life with a basket-case mother, but she always liked having a rough roadmap to follow. And right now _everything _had changed.

Because she wasn't just Jacob's girlfriend, she was his _imprint_.

His _mate_ _for life_.

Her toothbrush froze in her mouth as a fluttering heat shimmied up from the depths of her belly to choke her with emotion. She'd never have to leave again for the school year or move towns like she'd done like clockwork every three years, or deal with her mother's new phase of boyfriend or bottle.

And she'd _never _have to long for those magical hugs or make another desperate phone call to the only person who'd ever really understood her and always seemed to know just what to say...even if that was nothing at all.

Her reflection grew blurry and she blinked the tears into a sprint over her cheeks. But as she wiped them impatiently with the back of her hand, it was clear that those eerie new eyes staring back might be watery, but they were sure and strong.

She finally had a _home_.

With a sniffle, she started brushing again as a small smile curved her foamy lips. That little wooden house she'd always dreamed of? She could totally see them there. Maybe with the Pack hanging out on a Sunday afternoon (actually, come to think of it, it probably shouldn't be that little).

Bella chuckled at the thought and she spit out her mouthful of minty suds and rinsed while dreams and plans began to take shape. She plopped the toothbrush in the cup and slowly lifted her face back to the mirror.

Sure it was kind of like flying down to Vegas and getting married overnight (though technically they weren't old enough). Sure she was betting everything before she was 18 in a supernatural war that had no right to exist out of late night horror films. But in the face of a future of frightening unknowns, she'd _chosen _to follow her heart and her lifelong best friend.

Suddenly she realized with the cold, hard sureness of the God's honest truth that this was** it. ** What she'd been waiting for all this time: the beginning of _her_life. It actually felt like all the years leading up to this moment had simply been boot camp preparing her for the real thing. And Bella was ready.

Ready to start her life with Jacob.

It wasn't about "I" anymore. It was about "we." And "we" wasn't just her and Jake, it was also the Pack. For the first time _ever _Bella had a people, place and purpose - something she'd always yearned for. So even in the middle of a crazy war riddled with broken hearts, uncertain futures and psycho monsters, she had never felt better in her life.

Except for that smell.

"What the hell!" Bella hissed, whipping around and scowling at the bathroom. She kept getting these little whiffs of something _nauseating_.

"Bells?" Jacob's deep voice was instantly at the door.

"Something stinks," Bella called over her shoulder with a scowl. It was faint - being swirled by the droning fan - and smelled like ...rancid meat mixed with ammonia or something.

And there was something deeply disturbing about it.

Suddenly her eyes snapped to the pile of Jacob's clothes crumpled innocently in the corner by the tub as understanding crept up her spine with cold prickling fingers:

_Vampire_.

The memory hit her like a freight train:

'

_Dark alley...bruising hands... cold lapping tongue...rotting breath..._

_"You stink like the dog's spit, not his seed... I wonder what he'd do if I took what he wants first?"_

_Useless struggle... smothered screams...savage smile._

"_I never dreamed you'd be so much fun. I think I'll wait till next time to bite. Or the next. I can have you whenever I want."_

_Vulgar hands...hard body grinding her obscenely into the wall, while he... oh, God..._

"_How bout a quickie-..."_

'

"Bella," a velvet voice wrapped her in warmth along with muscled arms, yanking her back from that dark crumbling precipice.

Bella shrieked, finally freed from the paralysis of terror.

"Shh, I got you, honey," Jacob crooned, gently urging her around.

As soon as she could blink that darkness from her eyes, Bella dove to safety in that chest. She pressed her forehead into his sternum, shivering uncontrollably,.

_Oh God, it had all really happened. That night, had __really happened__. _

She could have been raped by that monster or killed or worse... _turned into one of them_. A corpse that sucked life from the living and was doomed to an eternity as a monster and... something Jacob _hated_. Her breath hitched in the valley between his pecs as she tried not to come apart at the thought.

But like he'd always done, Jacob wrapped his arms tightly around her and held her together.

A soft inhuman rumble rose up in his chest and seemed to wind around her with comfort and strength. That sound seeped into the tremors and shook them out lax until she could do nothing but wilt against him.

With a little sigh, she turned her cheek to press against his smooth musky skin - the perfect antidote. He smelled _so freaking good._ Just his scent erased that horrible stench from her nose, the dark memory from her mind and melted her bones into jelly all at the same time. His scent was pure magic.

As she relaxed, Jacob's embrace slowly animated into soothing strokes over her back and a little contented hum escaped her lips. Having a cop for a father, she knew enough to realize she'd had some kind of flashback. She hadn't really processed last night yet - obviously - if a word and smell could trigger such an uncontrollable- ...

Bella froze.

_Oh no._

Slowly she lifted her cheek from Jacob's chest and his hands stilled on her back. Blinking rapidly, she looked up into incandescent eyes and a stone cold expression that clearly answered her question. But she asked it anyway.

"You saw that?" she whispered.

Jacob's swallow looked arduous as that unnerving mask fissured in quivering nostrils and a little jerk to the muscles in his jaw.

"Yes," finally the word hissed from the back of his throat. There was an inferno behind those eyes but unlike every other time she'd seen that rage well up in him not a single muscle twitched.

"Jake," she breathed, her brow furrowing as she shifted to reach up to him.

He stopped her with a minute shake of his head.

While his eyes paced between hers intenselyl, one of his arms slipped from around her back to brush the hairs from her cheek. His fingertips were as gentle as a whisper over her skin as he silently stroked her cheek, over and over. His eyes seemed to reach in and embrace hers, engulfing her in a sparkling power that infused her with a sweet, secure warmth. For several wordless moments his stare spoke a silent soliloquy that she wished her ears could hear, but her heart understood well enough and slowed its frenetic gallop to a contented calm.

Finally he blinked, his eyes darting to his own hand. Bella's lashes fluttered rapidly feeling like she was waking up from a dream, but that halcyon heat stayed with her.

Her eyes darted over that stoic face as he watched his fingers. They carefully combed her hair behind her ear, following the shell to brush down the side of her neck with the back of his knuckles.

His touch was so tender, so caring - it had always been so - but now it was so incredibly intimate too. Bella's eyes drifted closed into his touch as as he followed the column of her neck down to her shoulder. There his calloused fingertips unfurled to ghost over her collarbone and then trace the hollow of her throat riding the draw of several of her breaths as they automatically slowed and deepened under his touch.

Then a single finger slipped up to ride her pulse, so lightly it pulled a wake of chill bumps behind it until it jumped to trace her jaw on it's way to her chin. There it stayed, petitioning her face up a little further with the gentlest pressure.

Her mouth curved in anticipation. She heard his soft intake of breath and felt the cool air fill the space between them as he bent down.

And then warm full silk was pressed to her lips.

Leaving her eyes closed to savor the sensation, one of Bella's hands reached up to splay over his stalwart heart as he caressed her mouth with his. And that's really what it was - a caress. His mouth played over hers with nothing more than the brush of skin, the press of comfort and so much love it made her heart ache.

Bella's eyes popped open at the incongruous final lick over the seam of her lips before he pulled away. But as surprising as it had been, the lap of his tongue had felt distinctly wolvish so it was also just as perfect as that kiss.

Jacob rested his forehead against hers while his tender palm palm found her jaw.

And Bella waited, her eyes losing focus and swimming in her head as she luxuriated in the sweet puffs of breath over her face. Finally she heard him lick his lips.

"I will kill him."

It was a whispered blood oath cut from a voice with a gritty edge of wild.

The words should have been shocking, but whether it was magic, the hypnotic hum of their bond, or that heated power that sparkled around her like fireflies, Bella didn't even flinch. Her eyes sought his, riveted steadily into hers.

And they burned.

She watched those long straight lashes blink once, a movement as unyielding and deliberate as that gaze.

"I swear he'll never get near you again," he rasped in a rush of hot air over her lips.

Normally she'd assure him that she trusted him, that she wasn't afraid, but some instinct knew this was a different kind of conversation all together. So instead she breathed him in - his security, his fire, his strength.

"I know," she whispered, exhaling his breath from her lungs.

Even though the words had chosen themselves, they must have been the right ones, because in a contrastingly abrupt movement, he leaned back down to brand her mouth with a single searing kiss.

Then - without a word - he straightened, pulling her to his chest with a covetous palm at the back of her head as the other arm wound possessively around her.

Suddenly she understood what instinct had already known: that voice and even that gentle touch had come from a fierce, instinctual part of him that would never fully be tamed. Those words were undeniably an Alpha wolf's covenant to his mate - a declaration of devotion, protection and retribution all rolled into the fires of an incendiary rage.

Bella closed her eyes and tried to rein in her reeling thoughts while Jacob continued to stroke his fingers gently through hair, giving her time to settle.

"So you can smell them now," he finally murmured in more familiar creamy bass tones as he shifted his embrace around her.

Bella blinked against his chest. The words were almost conversational and certainly out of context. While her mind tried to analyze, her heart thought it made perfect sense so Bella decided she'd do what she did in any new situation: follow his lead and observe.

"I guess so, huh?" she sniffed, hitching her sheet up a little higher uncomfortably.

"Last night?" he breathed cryptically.

Bella worried her lip - _no, it had been a different smell._ Last night that monster had reeked of death... and filth. Only something instinctual could link that memory together with this scent.

"No, only now," she confirmed, placing a smacking kiss to his chest and watching his pec jump in response.

She lifted her head and rested her chin on his sternum as she tried to gauge where he was going next. His face was a little more relaxed, but utterly impassive - like he'd tucked that intensity back under a cool obsidian facade. .

"Are you okay?" she ventured quietly, while her eyes did another worried circuit of his face.

"I promised right now was for us," he whispered - it was an explanation, apology and comfort all at once along with a refocusing that Bella desperately needed.

But then Jacob knew that.

She nodded with a small appreciative smile. Now she understood - he was fiercely fighting his own demons in order to give her the space and privacy to discuss this particular subject on her terms. Plus he had promised her ...and Jacob hated to break promises.

"You gonna be okay, Bells?" he asked quietly as his hand raked soothingly through her hair still giving her an opening if she decided now was the time. He'd always been good like that - letting her know he was there, saying just enough, never pushing.

"Yeah as soon as you get those stinky clothes out of here," she wrinkled her nose, going for light bravado and switching tacks. "I mean, they smell like rotting-... something or the other."

Jacob's lips curved in a supportive smile that definitely didn't reach his eyes. He had so much on his shoulders right now, she wished she hadn't just inadvertently added another crap-load. But they were in this together now and it promised to be a messy crazy thing - she'd known this - and she couldn't afford to let guilt or insecurity get in the way.

So she gave him her best attempt at coy and a return to minutes ago. "Why don't you finish with the Pack and I'll be outta here quick," she murmured with a shy suggestive smile that was of course bolstered by a humiliating blush.

A little sun broke through clouds in his eyes as both palms slipped up to cup her jaw. He drew in a deep breath at the crown of her head and then placed a noisy smacking kiss on her forehead.

"Love you," he blew out on his exhale.

"Love you more," Bella quipped with forced levity, bringing both hands to her sheet as he stepped away.

Jacob played along with a dutiful eyeroll as he shimmied by her and stooped to gather the offending clothes. She found herself cursing the towel he'd apparently thrown around his hips which thwarted what would have been a perfect peek at that gorgeous behind.

But all wayward thoughts evaporated as he stood and strode back past her. Bella found herself automatically throwing herself back against the sink to get out of the way like he was carrying a maggot infested corpse instead of a pile of dirty laundry. Something deep within her didn't want to even _accidentally _touch them.

"How can you even stand it?" Bella squeaked, holding her breath against that disturbing scent.

Jacob gave her a dark look. "Practice."

And with that he pulled the door closed behind him.

Bella stared at it for a several seconds. The moment she wasn't touching him everything seemed to tumble back over her at once.

She turned around and looked at the reflection of the strange new woman in the mirror again. The sealing of the imprint had brought with it so many gifts - Jacob was healing, they were together, there were a million dreams possible on the horizon.

But in that moment, all Bella could see was that so much was also still broken - and that there was even more now that could break.

This was going to be harder than she'd ever imagined.

Bracing her hands against the counter, she hung her her head and drew in a long steeling breath.

Hanging his head, Jacob sat slowly down on the edge of her bed. Elbows resting on his thighs he forced himself to hold that knot of clothes between his fists- like a ball of fire - while he took slow deep breaths of rage incarnate.

He could _feel _Bella right behind that door and instinctually withdrew from the connection to shield her from the holocaust that burned inside of him right now.

_How the __**fuck **__had he let this happen?_

He squeezed the clothes between his clawed hands like he could wring the filth from the cloth or maybe just that demon's neck.

_I mean, how the goddamn motherfucking __**fuck**__?!_

He'd _wanted _to know what that thing had done to her, and in those seconds before he could get to her he'd gotten a full-on fucking vivid idea: the obscene words she _never _should have heard, her terror and bravery, the pain and horror.

The _helplessness_.

She should _never _have to feel that. _Ever_.

A low rumble started in his gut and Jacob ground his teeth together to cage it.

That demon had _touched _her. In ways she never, fucking _ever _should be touched.

Jacob swallowed thickly as his muscles started to jump and slither under his skin.

That thing had slammed his tiny mate violently against a wall, _licked _her, _molested _her, and intended to do much more... and all for what?

To make _him _pay.

Jacob was paying, alright.

He'd seen only a few seconds of what Bella had had to endure _for him,_ but it played over and over in his mind; each word, each touch, each hitching breath of fear burned like acid. And they would live in him for his lifetime.

As a reminder.

As a reminder that he could _never _afford to make the same mistakes again.

He was Alpha. His Pack would never again be abandoned by weakness. Bella - both wolf's imprint and man's mate - would never, ever, f_ucking ever_ be touched by one of those things again.

Blinking his burning eyes, his face lifted as he set his jaw with determination. The blistering heat that ran through his veins charged down to coalesce in his gut in a knot of power and reactor for his rage.

In the distance, long low howls rose up one by one to thread the afternoon. Their Alpha's inferno was leaching out through their bonds. Because he'd let it. Just a trickle, because they needed to be ready for this - it was going to go down hard and fast.

That demon was going to fucking burn.

Jacob lunged to his feet and crossed purposefully to Bella's closet as he absently readjusted the towel around his hips. His mind clicked through the facts and analysis while his body tended to more mundane- but no less necessary - chores. He'd already successfully soothed and sent away the Pack before Bella had even called him. It had taken all of two minutes with the new well of power he had to draw upon.

Opening the door, he pulled out her laundry bin and the dirty sheets and clothes from last night. He needed to get this scent out of the house. Collecting the various towels from the floor, he jogged down the stairs to the washer while his mind was working double-time.

Bella's memory may have been agonizing, but it contained _vital _information about his enemy. And Jacob was going to use anything he could to bring that cocksucker down.

He already knew from her abridged version last night that James had been disappointed with "the game." He _wanted _the challenge; he liked to play with his prey.

Determined lips caged the growl that ripped from his gut as he flicked on the water and stuffed the laundry inside the machine.

His nose wrinkled in a silent snarl as he paced to the utility sink to wash his hands. _Thoroughly_. He didn't want to smell that particular scent again until he was sneering into that fuckers red eyes before he ripped his head off.

And that's the _last _thing he'd do to that thing.

The agitated howls dissolved into silence as Jacob pulled everything back behind that impenetrable wall. He couldn't afford for his Pack to catch even an errant wisp of his thoughts right now. Or, for different reasons, Bella.

This was going to be a delicate game with stakes that were unfathomable.

James was a cocky, cunning and a ruthless motherfucker who thrived on suffering. Every move he'd made to date, every word and gesture he'd used with Bella had been carefully calculated to incite fear. He needed it, thirsted for it... he _craved _it. Jacob could see it in his cold sadistic eyes from her memories.

The suffering was just as important to him as the end game. Maybe more.

And Jacob's biggest fear was that - now that Edward had crossed him - James was going to retreat to devise another strategy. Perhaps he'd persuade other leeches to help him like he'd done with the dreadhead. Then they'd have absolutely no warning or intel or anything to go on. And there was no hope of _predicting _a psychotic.

But something instinctual told him James wouldn't switch tactics just yet, he'd wait to gloat over the aftermath of this latest play...

And then go after her again. Just to prove he could.

It was a brilliant strategy to make this a game between the two of them with Jacob's heart the only pawn on the board. James knew that if anything happened to her - innocent, woman, mate-...

Suddenly he understood James _never intended_ to kill him. Only to torture then turn Bella and leave Jacob to rot in madness; tormented by either the instinct to kill his mate or the agony of having done so.

All while he got off on every last ounce of pain.

_Holy shit._

_Holy __**fucking **__shit._

It was way more than he could bear that Bella was messed up in this thing. Holding her in the bathroom - traumatized, shaking, afraid - it had made a dark merciless savagery rise like a monster from deep that threatened to overcome him. In fact there was _nothing i_n this world but their bond - her need, her touch, her beautiful face - that was strong enough to keep him in his skin right now. To all facets of who he was - leader, wolf, man - it was...

Well, there were no words in any language.

The ferocious protectiveness he felt for her eclipsed everything _as it should_; she was not only Pack, she was his _imprint_. It wasn't even personal (even though it was). He would protect any of them just as fiercely, but _strategically _if she were taken, his berserker madness would leach into the Pack and destroy them all.

As it almost had.

This wasn't just about Bella (even if it was) this was about _Pack_.

Hell, the whole tribe.

Who knew what a crazed feral pack of leaderless wolves would do? His Pack had been barely holding it together as it was until Bella came along.

"**It won't fucking happen!"**he snarled, slamming his hands on the washer so hard that it dented.

Squeezing his eyes closed, he braced his hands against the mangled washer and hung his head.

"_I won't let it,_" he hissed through gritted teeth.

He was fucking better than this. He was good at his shit when he was on his game and now that he had Bella he could _feel _the power running like liquid fire through his veins.

He wasn't being arrogant; those skills hadn't come easy. As a boy, he used to be so easy going that he could be lazy sometimes (what a joke that seemed now), but he always gave a million percent when people were involved. It was just part of his DNA. When his sisters had left leaving him alone with a father who'd been paralyzed by the same accident that killed their mother, Jacob hadn't complained. He'd simply done what he'd had to do.

So when he was handed the job of Alpha on the burning plate of not only his own shock and angony, but a crazed Sam and frightened hospitalized Emily, he'd stepped up and given that everything he had too.

Then came Jared... then Paul (shit that had sucked)... then he had to watch his two best buds go through the same hell. _And then_ he had to teach them how to kill by learning himself. They'd all been damaged before, but Phasing had just jacked that shit up a million percent. But he'd done it. Jacob had held them all together when he himself just wanted to fall apart.

_He'd worked his ass off to get where he was. _And there was no _fucking way_ he was going to let a leech screw things up now that they were just starting to get better.

Now that he had Bella.

With a grimace of determination, Jacob pulled down laundry detergent and carelessly dug out a cup of powder and dumped it in while he returned to spinning facts and scenarios in his mind.

"What're you gonna do next, you fuckin' leech?" he murmured. He rolled his lips as he absently tapped the empty plastic scoop against the new dents in the metal.

_C'mon think, Black. _

Jacob heaved a deep breath through his nose and blew it out slowly as he put the detergent away and pulled down the bleach.

"You're gonna hang around," he mused, absently unscrewing the cap. "So I gotta give you something to gloat about so you get sloppy."

He added a good hearty pour of bleach into the machine and shoved the jug brusquely back on the shelf.

"Maybe work through that fuckin' Cullen...?"

His eyes unfocused as he slowly lowered the lid and the machine chugged into action.

"_Then_ you're gonna go after B-..." he choked. He couldn't say such a blasphemous thing out loud. Even to himself.

'_I can have you whenever I want.' _That demon had made that boast and it was all part of the game to prove it.

And that was it: Jacob was going to give him the perfect opportunity.

As he sprang lightly up the stairs three at a time, strategy and tactic circled each other round and round. His mind ticked back through everything he knew so far - letting intuition and instinct guide his plan

James certainly wasn't stupid, but that parasite Cullen was. He was idiotic and so myopically focused on getting what he wanted (not the process like James) that _he'd _fall for a little trick... and take the information straight back to James.

"Let's use that mind raping to our advantage, huh?" Jacob chuckled darkly as he crossed the room to the bed.

But the sight and _scent _of this room instantly changed his focus. He felt his face soften with the curve of his lips as he stripped the the soiled mattress.

Bella was going to be pissed but there was no way in hell he was washing this. It smelled _so fucking awesome_. He pushed his face into the wad of linens, inhaling indulgently and a lupine rumble vibrated contentedly in his gut It was probably sick, but he didn't give a damn. Just this scent: the blood of her innocence and honeyed arousal mixed with his mark was a potent cocktail that instantly put everything in perspective.

No matter what he had to do, there was no way in hell Jacob would let that leech win.

But _now _was for them. He'd promised.

He let all thoughts of strategy and war slip from his shoulders as he took another deep breath of that ambrosial scent. He crossed to her closet and balled up the linen and tucked it into corner out of sight. Then he paced down the hallway to the linen closet and pulled out a sheet - he could only find flat ones - and he returned to her room to snap it out over the bed. It fluttered down over the mattress as he turned his attention to that quiet tuneless hum coming from the bathroom. Jacob smiled softly.

He needed her.

_Now_.

He _needed _to ground all this sickening worry and doubt in the soothing fragrant warmth of her skin. They had an hour before they had to return to duty, reality and consequences, and while his balls had felt like they were in a fucking vise since he'd awoken with a naked Bella draped over him, it was the ache in his _heart _that was unbearable.

He'd _missed _her... for an eternity, this year, these 10 minutes... no matter how you divvied up time, it would all be true. Finally she was his, and he needed to hold her as much as he could because he had no idea what this next week would bring.

Or the next.

Or the one after.

Fate and duty couldn't be beaten into submission - Jacob had already tried.

He pushed open the door to the bathroom and was instantly wrapped in her heady scent. The billowing steam was infused with her fragrance and he pressed his lips together to stifle an inadvertent groan.

Just this.

Just her scent made anything seem possible. When he'd been fighting the imprint (_why_, he couldn't even remember now) her scent had driven him mad, whipping his lust into a feral frenzy. Now it was soothing, comforting. A whisper to his heart that he was no longer alone.

She was such a _fucking incredible _gift.

He drew in another settling lungful as he peered around the door. The shower curtain was just opaque enough to be able to see her silhouette. She was tipping her face up to the spray and arching her back as she rinsed her long hair with the soothing sound of splashing water. Just the smooth arcing femininity of her body and movements made his body spring to instant rock-hard ready.

He let the towel drop to the floor as he squeezed his eyes closed for a moment, gathering himself. While no longer divided there were still the competing needs of a ravenous body and a yearning heart.

But all parts of him could agree: he _needed _to wrap her in his arms, one way or another.

He just needed to be patient and do it the right way. Which was easier said than done.

"Hey, can I come in?" Jacob called quietly, as his eyes popped open. He could hear the desperation in his own voice - he hoped to God she couldn't.

That little meandering hum instantly silenced, but he could also hear the stutter of her heart.

She was still uncomfortable, nervous - it didn't take supernatural senses to figure that one out. He knew it wasn't really with _him _per se, but with the new territory.

And he understood... _kinda_.

C'mon, he was a _guy _- and he'd been waiting for her for a long, long, _long _time. Add in the hormonal sucker punch of being a wolf (and Alpha at that) along with a year of dealing with all the shit he'd had to (and Paul's fucking filthy mind) and the only thing about sex that concerned him was getting more of it.

A lot more.

But even if he didn't totally understand, he did know what what she needed: someone to help her ease into comfort with her body and this new way of using it - coincidentally, not so different from his new wolves. Jacob was the perfect man for the job.

Of course, getting her comfortable with sex was the _easy _part.

"Bells?"

"Yeah, I'm almost done," she called nervously.

He smiled to himself as he strode into the bathroom - he'd given her too much time. He'd known she needed a little space for that brain of hers to get its bearings (plus he'd certainly needed the time to get himself under control), but now she was starting to overthink things.

He peered over the shower curtain. "We could take a shower together," he suggested in creamy tones sprinkled with lupine power like nutmeg to settle her.

Bella's face jerked up as her arms automatically snapped over those delicious breasts.

"Y'know," he tipped his head. "Save water and all that shit." He added in an eyebrow wiggle for good measure.

Bella's lips flirted with a smile and Jacob counted it as a win.

"There's not enough room," she complained, but her heart wasn't really in it.

And there it was: the wordless permission he'd been waiting for. He quickly pulled aside the shower curtain and ducked under the rod. She barely had time to turn around with a squeak (or second guess) before he had her wrapped in his arms.

"Oh yes there is," he growled playfully as he stepped into the tub. Jacob dipped his head down and placed sloppy slurpy kisses all over her face while she giggled and squealed and he spun them around.

He set her down with a final kiss on her nose, and then promptly turned his back on her. "See, plenty of room," he quipped casually as he dipped his face under the spray.

As she panted behind him from the exertion, Jacob pushed his hands through his hair then grabbed the soap and rubbed it over his chest, giving her time to acclimate to his much less provocative back.

His body was already over-cocked and over-ready - totally oblivious to the subtlety the situation required - those damn lupine hormones found that shy femininity a total turn-on. Actually Jacob thought _everything _about her was sexy. Always had.

His dick jumped impatiently and he pushed his face under the spray while his hand subtly turned the knob to add a little more cold water to the mix. He needed to keep in control - they _needed _this time to bond at this new level of intimacy before what came next.

Sure, they'd done it once, but the first time was driven so much by the imperative of the imprint, that it was sort of a different thing altogether. It was kind of like having sex when you're hammered off your ass and then waking up in bed the next morning.

He turned that cold knob a little farther.

Shucking the water out of his face, he subtly glanced over his shoulder and found Bella blinking at his ass with a little unconscious sexy smile playing on her lips. He couldn't help the purr of pleasure that tingled in his gut - his mate liked his body.

Not so coincidentally Jacob liked hers too, and he wasn't too happy about the fact that those arms were still wrapped over those suckable breasts.

"Bells, can you wash my back?" he asked with with a raised brow.

Bella's face jerked up with a blush like she'd been caught being naughty.

Jacob had to smother a chuckle as he turned just enough to hand her the soap. She'd always been so easy to read - she wore her heart on her sleeve with an authenticity that he fucking adored. She reached out to take it from him and the tingle from her touch zinged up his arm (and straight to his groin).

Jacob held the bar fast and her eyes darted questioningly up to his.

"Only if you wanna," he arched a brow.

Bella's lips curved in a shy smile that set his balls on fire. "I wanna," she whispered.

Because she did.

Bella just wished she weren't so insecure and just... just _stupid_.

Jacob gave her one of his roguish lopsided smiles (that she loved) as he released the soap to her hands and turned back around, turning the shower down to a drizzle. Then he braced both hands against the tiles in a way that excised the muscles of his back . It sent a wash of heat through her body like she'd been injected with liquid cayenne.

Blinking at her body's instant reaction, she pulled her lip into her mouth and took a hesitant step toward him. He really did look _huge _in the shower. She was being silly, she knew it, but things had changed so fast and geez... look at that body! He towered over her by more than foot! And that was part of all this, she realized. She hadn't even recognized him in her yard that day; he looked nothing like the Jake of just a year ago. It made all this new stuff just a little more disconcerting.

She let her eyes run up and down his perfect athletic form as she rubbed the bar of soap between both hands. Even though it was a little intimidating, she did _really _loved his body. Tentatively she reached out and ran a sudsy palm over one shoulder blade.

The touch of his skin instantly relaxed her.

She took a step closer and rubbed the bar of soap down the opposite side of his back. It bumped and skidded over the topography of his corded muscle. His skin was so soft and smooth over that ropey iron.

Fascinated, she pulled the soap slowly down his back, memorizing the way each muscle pulled toward his spine and unconsciously relaxing more and more by the rib. She switched the bar first to one hand and then the other, her free palm taking the opportunity to explore the smooth peaks and valleys from his shoulder blades down to the small of his back. She was too shy to go further (over that awesome muscular bottom).

_Oh, he felt so freaking good. _

His toffee skin looked even darker set against the white soap suds and felt like satin stretched over rippling muscles that quivered under her touch. She stepped closer and reached up to smooth a palm over one of those massive shoulders.

It felt familiar.

The bar of soap dropped headlessly to the tub as she reached up to caress the other. Her hands smoothed back and forth, massaging the thick corded muscles in his neck and down over the powerful bulk of his shoulders.

These were strong shoulders. Broad shoulders. They had dauntlessly born any weight the world piled on them.

And they felt so familiar because she'd held onto them while they _made love_.

"Oh, Jake," she whispered collapsing against him and encircling his waist with her arms. She rested her cheek against his spine and closed her eyes as he pushed off the wall.

"Y'okay?" he murmured, his hand covering hers on his stomach.

Bella nodded mutely against him.

As usual he didn't press but just rubbed his palm soothingly over the back of her hand then threaded his fingers through hers.

She drew in a deep breath and exhaled it slowly, trying to send all the doubt and insecurity out along with it. The water from the shower set a tinkling backdrop to the narcotic beat of his heart. With her ear to his back she could hear the intimate rush of air in and out of his lungs like she was inside him. Her free hand smoothed cherishingly up and down his rippling stomach.

"I love you," she breathed.

She heard his soft swallow. "I love you too."

"I'm sorry I'm being so stupid, Jake," she sighed. "I mean, it's just so _fast _and -…and all this stuff has been, I mean I'm worried and-... I feel like I -... I mean you-..." Just like her thoughts, the words careened into a jumbled pile on her tongue like a train wreck.

Finally she just huffed out a defeated breath and pressed her forehead into his sudsy back as she squeezed him tightly.

"Heeyyy," he crooned, his body turning in her grasp.

Embarrassed that she being so lame, she squeezed her eyes shut as he gently disengaged himself. Bella let her hands drop to her sides with a slap of resignation. She felt his fingers wipe over her face - suds she supposed - before his big hands came up to her shoulders.

"Take a step back, honey," he murmured.

Bella's eyes blinked open in confusion as she automatically complied. He gave her a reassuring smile as he folded down to his knees.

Without even thinking about it, her arms slithered up to cover her breasts.

Jacob's hands reached out to gently - and pointedly - pull her wrists away and Bella rolled her eyes at herself.

"See? Stupid," she snorted, her eyes darting off to the side, uncomfortably.

Jacob sniffed, slowly shaking his head. He took each of her hands in his and waited until she met his eyes.

When she did, she sucked in a little gasp. They were his soft, kind Jacob eyes - the ones he always used to have. Comforting and familiar, even though they were now lighter and flecked with gold. Like hers.

"You're not being stupid Bella," he said quietly.

Bella opened her mouth to protest.

"Wait, hear me out," he stopped her.

Bella pressed her lips together and huffed a breath through her nose.

Jacob looked into each of her eyes with concern. "It _has _been fast," he whispered. He blew a breath out of his cheeks as his gaze fell thoughtfully to their entwined hands. Rolling his lips he rearranged their grip so their fingers were threaded.

He looked up again with a furrowed brow. "Do you regret it?"

Bella frowned. "No way, Jake," she expelled the words on an incredulous laugh as if it was the most ridiculous question in the world (which it was).

Jacob's lips stretched out into one of his old sunny smiles and he ducked in with a quick playful kiss to her nose.

It surprised her and she blinked with a giggle.

"Good," Jacob grinned back at her for a moment until his lips again softened into thoughtful.

And Bella waited, listening to the soft unenthusiastic whisper of the shower and watching the little rivulets of water trace the lines of his smooth chest. She looked back up and saw that the water was hitting the back of his head just enough to siphon drops down the black spikes of his hair and into his face.

Automatically she shimmied her hand free so she could push his hair back. She shucked the water from his face with her palms but it kept right on coming, drizzling from his hair.

"C'mere," he growled playfully, and he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into his chest. Bringing her with him, he shuffled forward a little more out of the spray on his knees.

Smiling into those warm eyes (he was just a few inches shorter on his knees), Bella used both hands to again smooth back his wet hair. Her gaze darted to her hands as she got lost in the sensation of his slick hair and warm scalp. She raked her hands through it a few times and then her fingers came back to play with the drops that clung lovingly to his features of his face.

He was watching her intently, but she avoided his eyes as her fingers gathered the lingering drops of water along the line of his brow, his cheekbone, down to his jaw. Soon it became less about his comfort and more about just... well, him.

Truth be told, she loved his face now. She'd loved it as a boy too, but now it seemed more balanced, complete. And it was just the right combination of masculine and sensual...

"Hey," he whispered, drawing her out of her thoughts.

Her eyes darted to his - his expression was complex and stone cold serious. Bella took a resetting breath and gave him her full attention.

He cleared his throat quietly. "I know you're already clean, but can I wash you again?"

She blinked; she didn't know what she thought he would say but it was certainly not that.

"While I talk?" Jacob's brow raised.

Then she understood; it was easier for him to talk when his hands were busy. Anytime she was trying to break him down about something that he needed to talk about (but wasn't) she did it when he was doing something physical.

She nodded, pulling the corner of her lip into mouth.

Jacob gave her a businesslike nod and then released her, turning his torso to scoop up the the forgotten soap from where it had slid toward the drain. Bella's eyes automatically slid over the cut musculature in his perfect chest, down his rippling abs to where his...

Jacob turned back around rubbing the soap between his hands and caught her staring.

She was so flustered that she blurted exactly what was going through her head at the moment:

"So it's got different positions?"

And regretted it immediately, for obvious reasons.

Jacob's laugh came out in an explosive snort.

Clamping her mouth shut with the click of teeth, Bella squeezed her eyes closed as pretty much every drop of blood in her body charged to her face.

Mortified didn't even come close.

After a few seconds of just the the sound of the spattering shower and a soft rhythmic shuffling, Bella cracked open one eye.

Jacob was rubbing the soap between his palms and watching her with a gazillion kilowatt smile plastered all over his face (that was _almost _worth the humiliation).

Bella rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest uncomfortably.

He valiantly smothered that smile into feigned solemnity but the sunshine just bled into his eyes.

Raising his brow, he dropped the soap with a thunk. "Why yes, it does.," he answered in a theatrically informative tone. The bar skidded around the tub.

"Y'see, Bells," he continued with an earnest cock of his head. "Right now I'm trying really really _really _hard **not **to think about how much I wanna throw you on the bed and make love to you _again and again and again and again_," he droned with a roll to his eyes like it was a chore. "So he's at the position known as: '_half mast_,'" he explained, exaggerating his enunciation.

For a moment, Bella just stared at him.

Jacob stared right on back, totally deadpan.

Then they both burst out laughing.

And it felt _so freaking good_.

The embarrassment and stress was instantly expelled as she laughed at herself, at the inherent humor of the situation... and at the absurdity of ever feeling uncomfortable with Jacob Black.

"C'mere, honey," Jacob said through his residual chuckles, pulling her to him again and using the opportunity to slick his soapy hands over her back. With a final hitching sigh she tucked the laughter away and fell against him, circling her arms around his neck and leaning her cheek on his broad shoulder.

For several seconds they just stayed there, breaths syncopated, bodies humming from their bond, hearts falling into rhythm. And Bella thought about what they must look like: an Alpha on his knees dwarfing a bathtub as he held his considerably shrimpier imprint while she recovered from many things but belly aching laughter being one of them.

For a moment it was just Jake n' Bells... but different.

Yet still, easy as breathing. If she'd let it.

"There's been a ton of change, Bella," Jacob whispered finally, all humor evaporating from sincerity. "And you' been through a whole hell of a lot."

He left that statement hanging in the air between them as his hands started smoothing over her back, slipping in slow soapy circles. She melted even more against him and just closed her eyes into the sensation of his tender soapy touch paired with the soft chafe of his callouses.

But when he hadn't continued on after several minutes, Bella lifted her head to look at him.

Jacob gave her a sad smile and his hands slipped up to hold her shoulders.

"I know I'm real different, Bells," he whispered, his voice melancholy and melting with the same resignation she saw in his eyes.

Bella's brow crumpled as she reached up to his cheek. "Jake-.."

"Shhh.." he murmured as he caught her fingers in a soapy hand and ferried them to his lips. He pressed a kiss to the tips and then released them. Holding her gaze, he reached over his shoulder and caught water from the shower spray and then brought it down, rubbing his palms together.

Eyes holding hers, his hands returned to her shoulders and then slid them down to pointedly encircle each of her biceps in the span of his fingers. Pressing his lips together in a somber smile, his gaze fell to where his thumb and middle finger completely ringed her arm. Slowly he dragged them down, pulling them past the knob of her elbows, all the way down to her wrists where he could almost wrap his fingers around double.

It was poignant metaphor: he _had _changed a lot.

His gaze darted from one hand to the other and then returned to hers. "But the part of me that loves you," he whispered slowly, emphatically. "That hasn't changed, Bella - _you _taught me that."

Bella released a long shaking sigh as her eyes paced between that intense and steady stare.

His eyes washed over her face a moment as if assessing, and then dropped back to where his hands unfurled from her wrists and slipped to her waist. He rubbed back and forth, reaching around to drag his palms soothingly up her lower back.

"I'm the same guy who had that shitty shed that I called a garage," he sniffed a laugh. "Where you used to hang out all Saturday... Sunday too, sometimes," he tipped his head with a private smile as he watched his hands smooth up her sides. "Laying on that beat up ole couch... reading, drinking warm soda … while I worked on the Rabbit and told you every stupid thing that came into my head."

His hands dragged back down to her waist, encircling it absently as his eyes unfocused somewhere between them. Bella's eyes flitted over his face as memories flashed over it in completely uncensored expressions.

Licking his lips, he glanced again up into her eyes. "Remember, I'm the first guy who took you cliff diving?" his mouth quirked and his hands reached out blindly to thread through her fingers. "And you were all freaked out so I told you to hold my hand and we'd jumped together..." He chuckled to himself and his lips stretched into a grin. "You grabbed my neck on the way down, choking me and screaming all the way like you were getting fucking murdered."

Bella nodded, biting her lip and trying to blink away the burn to her eyes. Such simple happy days - days they'd spent together before monsters and magic and pain. Despite her best efforts, her eyes started to well with tears, blurring her periphery.

Jacob silently held her gaze for a moment, then his hands squeezed hers and returned to her hips. Sucking in a resetting breath, his brow furrowed sadly as his gaze returned to the hypnotic ministrations of hands over skin.

"And I'm the kid you called crying," he whispered as his palms started travelling down her thighs. "Because your mom was too _fucking wasted _to take you to school the first day of eighth grade." He swallowed thickly, anger flashing over his features. He tamped it down with a resolute blink as he sat back on his heels and his hands continued down her calves. "So I played hooky and we talked on the phone all day, watching stupid TV shows and making lame jokes," his lips quirked as his eyes darted up to hers. "Remember?"

Tears had overrun her attempts at quelling them now and were streaming down her cheeks. "Yeah, Jake," she quavered.

Jacob's hands idly rubbed up and down her calves as he watched her for a moment, an unreadable expression deepening the lines of his face. Pressing his lips together with a little shake of his head at some memory, his gaze fell back to where his palms started climbing, dragging languidly up her legs, gently massaging along the way.

"And I'm the boy you _finally _got to break down after his mom died," he breathed, his eyes slowly rising until they locked with hers. "In the shed carving that _wolf _you'd demanded - of all things," he coughed a laugh that didn't reach his eyes.

For a moment he just held her gaze as his hands ran absently up and down her thighs. She caught his hands at her hips.

Jacob's Adam's apple bobbed with his swallow as she laced her fingers through his. "You had to take the knife out of my hands, I was fucking bawling so hard," he breathed, just staring into her eyes as memories played behind his.

Bella's breath hitched as she nodded, lips pressed together to cage her sobs. Of course she remembered that day. Holding him.

"And you held me until I couldn't cry anymore," he echoed her thoughts. "We spent the night out there, remember?"

Sniffling wretchedly she squeezed his hands as she nodded through streaming tears. Life could be so cruel and unfair... but it was also beautiful. Bella now knew that beyond a shadow of a doubt. This man sitting before her was beautiful, and any time she got with him was priceless.

Suddenly her tears - which she was trying so hard to suppress - started rebelling in bucking hiccups.

"Heyyy," Jacob whispered, as his hands slithered free from hers and returned to her hips. He smoothed up and down, his touch soothing her as his eyes subtly heated with gold. That heady sparkling power seemed to siphon through their locked gazes, filling her up with warmth, infusing her with strength, calming her with comfort.

Bella took a slow open-mouthed breath and then released it through her nose as those sobs evaporated along with the shimmering magic around her. She blinked several times, the tears sprinting over her cheeks.

Jacob leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on her soapy stomach. With a hitching sniffle, Bella's hands came up to stroke through his hair as he looked up at her and rubbed his nose idly back and forth over her navel. And for several minutes they just silently shared the bittersweet memories.

"You okay?" he whispered as he rose up, pressing his lips again to her stomach.

Bella bit her lip and nodded with a juicy sniffle.

"Y'sure?" He punctuated the questions with another press of his lips a little higher.

She noded again raking her fingernails through his ebony hair.

Watching her closely, he lay a trail of of kisses up her torso as his palms settled securely on her hips. But in the valley between her breasts, he drew in a deep indulgent breath and his eyes drifted closed as a low inhuman purr rose from his chest. And he rested.

Smiling sadly, her hand cupped the back of his head, pulling his cheek to her heart.

And she just held him.

It felt good to have him there - like she could protect him from all the pain of the past and all that was yet to come. God, he'd suffered enough.

The peaceful thrum grew louder as Jacob wrapped his arms around her and for several minutes or several hours - she didn't know and didn't care - and she just stroked his cheek as she held him to her breast.

Finally that noise dissolved in a quiet intake of breath and he turned his head and rested his chin on her sternum. His eyes blinked lazily open and found hers.

Bella gave him a small smile.

Without a word, he pressed his lips to the rise of each breast, before straightening to his knees. His eyes darted between hers intensely - his his warm kind Jacob-eyes.

"It's just me, Bells," he whispered.

Bella's hands slipped back to the nape of his neck.

"I love you so much," she breathed, leaning in to seal the declaration. She pressed her lips soundly to his full russet mouth while her heart beat out several measures of her love.

Then with a moist smack, she pulled back a few inches, and surveyed her handiwork.. The most beautiful smile softened his face - tender, happy, free.

"This is just another thing we're doing together, right?" he whispered and his brow raised in a boyish expression of hope that had somehow miraculously survived from days gone by.

Wordlessly, Bella's eyes paced between his for a moment and then her hands deliberately slid over those bulky shoulders and slowly down his brawny biceps. Taking her time, she detoured to explore the topography of his arms, backtracking to caress lovingly, cherishingly over his shoulders.

Bella tipped her head and her eyes washed over this face that she loved. This new face and the old Jacob. The old Bella and the new. Somehow, in this crazy mixed up world, together.

Her hands continued down his elbows and slowly over his thick forearms. His eyes were darting over her face looking cues, finding none she knew. But Jacob had always known when to wait.

Her hands slipped down to those wrists, the girth of the bone showing just how big he was now. Just how powerful. But still his touch was so _caring_. So _kind_. How had he managed to do all that he'd been forced to by a cruel fate and keep that gentle touch?

Looking into his eyes, she pulled his hands from her hips and dragged them up her sides, his fingers brushing over her skin and raising chill bumps.

And she ferried them to her breasts.

Jacob had let her lead, but now he took over and his warm palms moulded over each swell. With a soft sniff of bliss, his eyes rolled under the lids and then returned to hers.

"I love these," he mouthed soundlessly as his hands sensuously kneaded, the callouses of his hands raising her nipples.

And nothing ever felt more right. Or wonderful.

Bella's eyes fluttered closed with the heady wash of warmth up her body and she steadied herself with a hand splayed against his chest. His touch lit sparkles behind her eyes, melted her bones, and siphoned heat down to pool, heavy and yearning, between her legs. It felt so good.

So good just to feel.

His ministrations worked their way up, brushing lightly with fingertips over her collarbone and then up the side of her neck under her hair. Bella's eyes drifted open as he cupped her head - the heel of his hand resting at her jaw while his fingers stroking the hairs at the nape of her neck.

His expression was unfathomable. Licking his lips, he pulled her toward him at the same time he leaned in and he kissed her. Sumptuous, languid, loving he tipped his head from one side and then to the other, pulling her heart up her throat with the long slow pulls of his mouth against hers.

But as her breath quickened, he broke the kiss by pulling back just a millimeter with the luxurious cling of skin.

There he stayed, hovering over her mouth, taking up her entire field of vision.

"Let me in, Bella," he breathed, warm and sweet and whispering over her lips.

Bella's heart stuttered in her breast.

_Those words._

Those four simple words set off a string of realizations that fell like dominos to a single poignant epiphany. It was jarring.

Bella jerked back out of his hands, her widened eyes immediately finding his.

His expression showed he knew. He'd known all along.

All these years and she'd never really let him in - she'd never let _anyone _in.

Bella was good at giving, but with a chaotic life full of change, selfish people and disappointment, she was terrified of letting anyone get too close. It was so very hard to trust and be vulnerable when your heart was the only thing you could really count on. And this year had almost killed her because she had finally been ready to shed her childhood of dysfunction and let him in, trusting that he'd always be there.

When suddenly he wasn't.

"Bella?" Jacob whispered, stroking a hand over her hair and tucking a wet lock behind her ear.

Bella blinked back to focus in his concerned eyes.

But now he was.

She licked her lips slowly. "You're never going to leave?" she asked, the words a barely escaping on a breath.

Jacob returned her gaze solemnly with eyes that were subtly heated and squared his jaw.

"Never."

It was an oath cut from the fabric of his soul, from all facets of his being- she could _feel _it - and it was the last thing she needed to break through that wall of fear she'd been furiously chipping away at ever since she got ...

Home.

"Oh, Jake," she gushed, throwing her arms around him and burying her face in his strong arms wrapped tightly around her as she squeezed him with everything she had. She knew he could take it.

Unfolding to his feet, he pulled her up with him and Bella automatically wrapped her legs around him. She came up for air long enough to place a kiss to his pulse before diving back into the comfort of his skin and scent.

He smelled so freaking good! Spicy and earthy and virile and sweet.

She drew in an covetous lungful of it, her enthusiasm sucking his skin into her nostrils with a little snort.

"Mmm," she hummed undaunted, and simply pulled back a little farther so she could get an unencumbered whiff.

Jacob chuckled as he turned them around.

_She wanted to eat him alive! _

"How the hell can you smell so _freaking yummy_?" she enthused rubbing her nose along his jaw.

_Or maybe it was the other way around._

The low rumble in Jacob's gut advertised that the statement (or question) made him fucking insanely happy.

"I'm your mate, Bells," he purred, turning his head with a quick peck to her forehead. "Now that you' got a little wolf in that nose, I should smell like the best thing in the world."

Bella picked her head up and looked at him.. "You do. You always did," she said earnestly.

Jacob's smile hurt his cheeks. They were out of practice.

"Do **I**?" she asked.

_She had no fucking idea._

"Oh hell yeah. _A million times better _than the best," he grinned. When she frowned at him he wiggled his nose. "I' got a better one."

She seemed satisfied enough by that and collapsed back against his shoulder as she wrapped her arms around his neck again and unapologetically squeezed the shit out of him. Of course, he could take it (barely felt it).

In fact, he loved it.

She was opening up and letting her guard down. It was like that dulling veneer of insecurity and fear was cracking and crumbling away from that guileless soul. Bella had always been so sincere in the world - always so giving and caring. But he could feel her starting to take a little for herself. A little bit of _him_.

He'd been offering for so long.

For a moment, Jacob just relished the feel of her in his arms. But even though he hated to admit it, time was running out. And, honestly, he really, really, _really _needed to be inside her again (more accurately: as many times as he could get).

It was a craving.

And it went beyond the typical appetite of a horny teen (which he guessed he technically was), it was a deep-down instinctual _need _to mate with her as many times as he could beforethis looming conflict. He guessed it was some kind of reproductive instinct to try to infuse his mate with his scent and his seed before... war.

The thought was sobering.

"Let's get this soap rinsed off," he murmured as one of his arms slipped under her ass to support her while the other reached out to the shower handles.

"I can get down," she picked her head up and immediately started wiggling.

An inadvertent growl scurried up his throat as he turned to her. She froze, staring back at him with big eyes.

But Jacob made no apologies. She'd have have to learn to navigate these lupine idiosyncrasies- being the dominant that he was. There were some things he just couldn't change. Even for her.

"I don't want you to get down," he bit out crisply.

She blinked and then her eyes took on an impish sparkle as they washed over his face. She smothered the private smile trying to blossom and flopped back down on his shoulder without a word.

_But she'd been playing him like a pro already, hadn't she? _

Jacob pressed a grateful kiss to her forehead and turned sideways so she was spared what would certainly be a tepid deluge as he reached out to turn the shower up.

Warm water sprayed cheerfully over his back. "How the hell can there still be hot water?" he gaped.

"Dad replaced the heater before I moved in," she murmured as she watched her hand smooth idly from his chest to his shoulder and back again. "He said girls take long showers."

Jacob barked a laugh. "If only he knew."

She picked her head up and squinted at him. "I'm sure he does. God, that's gonna suck," she groaned.

"Don't think about it right now honey," he soothed, trying to see her face as he absently ran his hand under the shower, just to make sure. "This time is for us." She didn't pick her head up so Jacob nuzzled his cheek against her forehead. "Just feel this."

He turned her into the warm spray and she sighed against him, pushing her face further under his jaw like she was trying to crawl into his skin. Jacob rubbed his hand over her back and down a thigh, soothing away the soap with a cherishing palm.

"Mmmm," she hummed under his jaw.

He pushed the hair back from her face with tender fingers. "Does it feel good?" he murmured.

Bella lifted her head from his shoulder. Inches away, her eyes crossed as they did a circuit. "_You_ feel good, Jake," she whispered.

Jacob's brow raised with his pleasure."'That so?" he breathed.

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth and nodded shyly.

_God, he fucking loved her._

"You do too, honey," he murmured as his eyes darted over that beautiful face trying to memorize every last millimeter.

Bella's lip popped free in a gorgeous, unencumbered smile that simply took his breath away.

"Let's get rinsed off?" she ventured with a brave little eyebrow wiggle, followed of course by an endearing charge of color to her cheeks.

Jacob could only nod and step into the spray.

It only hit his shoulders but it doused her good. Bella sputtered and slapped at her face and he smiled. She had this innocence about her that had always made him want to protect her - even before all this.

Readjusting his arm more securely under her, he reached out and ghosted a palm up her rib cage and slowly over the rosy peak of her breast. She shuddered in his arms and blinked at him through the sluice.

Jacob dove down and captured her mouth with his as he turned them around, shielding her from the shower. Placing kiss after kiss on her mouth while she giggled blindly, he reached behind his back and yanked the water off.

She was rinsed enough (whether she was or not).

At that, a soggy Bella sat back in his arms and squeegeed the rest of the water from her face. The shower had pulled her hair into auburn rivulets that parted for each breast and he couldn't help that his eyes got hopelessly ensnared as he raked the shower curtain out of the way and stepped out of the tub.

Bella dipped down to capture his gaze with a playful little smile sparkling in her eyes and on those deliciously mismatched lips.

Jacob's balls felt like they incinerated on the spot.

She smothered a little laugh and looped her arms around his neck. "What about towels Jake?" she prompted as he opened the bathroom door and turned off the light. "We're gonna drip everywhere."

"I'll clean it up," he mumbled, as, eyes locked with hers and he paced across the hall. Truth be told, he didn't give a fuck about the puddles in his wake. He was patient, but he simply couldn't wait any longer.

Bella's smile became private and his gaze flitted over her face curiously. He paused with his hand on her bedroom door. "What?"

Her lips stretched into a grin that heated her cheeks.

Jacob raised prompting brows, his lips catching the mystery smile anyway.

"It's not at half-mast anymore, huh?" she murmured and then pulled the corner of her lip into her mouth.

Jacob's smile tilted awry as he slowly shook his head and closed the door. Of course she could feel his (throbbing) erection bouncing against her ass as he walked.

Holding his gaze she wiggled, that pert little cheek teasing him.

But somewhere along the way, Bella decided that rubbing her crotch against his abs felt _good _and it became something else altogether. Leaning back and hanging off his neck to give her a better angle, she closed her eyes and shamelessly rubbed herself against him with sexy undulations of feminine hips. Jacob naturally made sure every last muscle was taut for her use.

Jacob took the remaining steps toward the bed slowly, his eyes cataloging every expression, every pore with the predatory intensity of a wolf preparing to take his mate. Because that's exactly what he was.

His eyes fluttered as he drew in a deep breath through his nose and held it. She was so fucking hot it wasn't funny (at the moment, this eclipsed the fact that this also represented significant progress and a win for his bathtub tactics). But he needed to stay in control - and that was hanging by a thread at the moment. This was only their second time and she'd been recently touched in a very wrong way. That thought brought a wash of rage and just the thing to bolster his waning restraint.

But that little bump in forbearance didn't count for much at this point. While under any other circumstances he could watch her masturbate against him all day, he _needed _her.

_Now_.

"Y'know, I'm pretty impressed," he murmured, trying to pull her attention back from the wonder of his abs. Her eyes popped open and she sat back up (it was a damn shame).

"You haven't let a single thought slip through." He lowered himself to the foot of her bed and laid back, pulling her down with him while she gave him a broad and gratified smile. He wished his wolves had this kind of control (especially Paul).

"Impressed or pissed?" she quirked a knowing brow.

Jacob sniffed. " 'Little a both," he admitted.

"A little of both, huh?" she murmured through a sultry smile that was _made _of temptation.

He couldn't take any more.

Without warning, he flipped them in a lithe and lightning move that left Bella on her back at the head of the bed and Jacob hovering over her.

Her eyes were startled from the head-spinning movement, but she'd get over it. In fact, as he lowered his body incrementally over hers, those eyes went from wide to wanting in a second flat.

_That's it, honey._

"Yeah, guess I'm a little pissed," he breathed, dusky and low, as he settled on his elbows. "Because it's my new most favoritist thing." A knee pushed between her legs.

Her lips curved as she snaked her hands around his neck. "And what's that, Jacob?" she crooned breathily, slipping under his sensual seas.

Jacob leaned down and ghosted his nose over her cheek, drawing a lazy circle as he settled both legs between hers. "Being inside Bella," he whispered. "Any way I can get it."

He heard her soft hitch of breath as another luscious wave of fragrant arousal rose from her skin. It was already saturating the air, already tingling on his tongue, already indelibly etched into his brain. Jacob traced the tip of his nose over her jaw and then dipped down to lick up her pulse, gathering her nectar on his tongue while a soft lupine rumble percolated in his gut.

_My mate._

She tasted delicious, she smelled beyond amazing - he wanted to saturate her skin with his scent, fill her with his seed and watch her body swell with his child.

The thoughts surprised him, but the more he thought about it, the less he could fathom why. They just felt so incredibly fucking right. It wasn't another voice in his head now, it was his own. Jacob squeezed his eyes closed and rested his forehead against her cheek for a moment, gathering himself. He understood now a little more about Emily and Sam.

Bella's hands smoothed over his hair and he picked his head up to meet those new amber eyes. Was it his imagination or was the gold subtly heated?

That question fell into the pit of inconsequential as Bella slowly picked her head up off the bed and her hand settled at the nape of his neck. Her gaze washed over his face and then got stuck on his mouth.

Jacob licked his lips and lowered his head the few inches to meet her halfway. But just before her lips touched his, all that was Bella broke over his head like a deluge of honey as she opened her mind to him.

He gasped the breath from her lungs as she met his mouth in a passionate kiss.

_'_

_Heart rending love._

_Soulful affection._

_Physical attraction._

_The feminine serenity found in security and containment. _

_Home._

_She was overflowing and overwhelmed._

_She _needed _to ground that euphoria in his skin. _

_She _needed _him to pound his oath into her body._

_She ached... she craved._

_For him to fill her._

'

And the dam broke.

All the fire stoked by her body, her touch, her scent - everything about her - rushed through Jacob's veins in a searing torrent of heat.

With a low rumbling growl, Jacob pushed her head back to the bed. She melted like butter under his hot hungry mouth as he pressed her into a kiss that might as well be trying to swallow her whole.

He could _feel _how much that turned her on.

Jacob's hand slithered under her head as their mouths dueled, gasps and the click of teeth punctuating any incidental break in the seal of their lips.

Bella not only met his heat, she poured volatile accelerant all over it. Unconsciously she gripped him tighter with her heels as she pressed her hot crotch against the tip of his weeping erection. Then capturing his tongue, which was marking its territory over every inch of that sweet velvet mouth, she suckled hungrily.

He nearly came on the spot.

He pushed her more soundly into the bed with a grunt as his hand shimmied covetously under the small of her back.

_Bite._

_Restrain._

_Fuck._

The impulse tore through him like a heat seeking missile making him groan and break the kiss in a frantic bid to shake the lupine imperative which had risen up as naturally as his own cock.

Bella's fingers dug more soundly into his hair pulling him back with a plaintive cry.

'_More... more... more... more...' _ her mind pulsed with the chant to the beat of her heart.

_He wanted to flip her over, cage her in his arms and fuck her until she was screaming his name._

He smothered her gasp with fierce lips, slamming her head back against the bed. Devouring her mouth, he carved it out with his tongue searching frantically for something to quench this hunger. But all he did was excavate a throaty moan from his mate as her ankles gripped his thighs tighter and she arched under him.

_Wanting mate._

_Sweetened scent._

_Take. Bite. Fuck._

He wouldn't take her like this. He _couldn't_.

He tore his lips from hers with inhuman strength, but it was simply not possible to pull away completely. His mouth needed to stay in contact with her skin and it did so in savage messy open-mouthed kisses along her jaw on his way to her racing pulse which was calling him like a siren. She turned her head and pressed her neck encouragingly into his mouth.

_God, he wanted to bite her so fucking bad. And then flip her over..._

Jacob growled in frustration as he latched over the tendon at the side of her neck and ravenously suckled, massaging with his teeth, desperately trying to satisfy that urge with a counterfeit proxy. And with a throaty moan, Bella went limp under him in instinctual submission.

Receptive submission to her mate.

And Jacob almost lost it.

"Open," Bella murmured thickly, sounding drugged. "Open, Jake."

Her voice was just enough of a ledge for the fingertips of his control. He held on for dear life.

'_Open... please Jake,' _the request was repeated in a heady honeyed drizzle in his mind.

He knew what she wanted, but there was no way in fucking hell she could see the war that was going on inside of him. He wasn't even capable of human speech right now.

And it scared him shitless.

_God, but he _craved _to flip her over and pound his seed into her womb over and over and..._

"Jacob Black!" Bella barked. "Stop."

It was the fear that did it.

She knew he was out of control but, holy crap! Damned if she could care when he was making her feel like he was. Even though his intensity was a little rough around the edges, his hands were gentle, and it was a definite plus that he made it impossible to over-think anything... or think at all for that matter.

Jacob had always been passionate and Bella was just starting to understand how incredibly that was going to translate in bed. Frankly this real, earthy passion was just the thing she needed to let off some of this steam. She felt like her heart _and _her body were going to explode … or implode - her heart was too full, her body too empty.

But as carried away as she was getting, she couldn't ignore his struggle. She could _feel _it. Even though he wouldn't open up to her she could _feel _his fear. She could also feel his fire - this pent-up energy that he was wrestling with and that prowled in his touch like a caged animal.

And she wouldn't let him struggle alone. Not anymore.

Jacob had instantly stopped at her command, like she'd flipped a switch. And right now he was panting like a racehorse in rough-hewn breaths pressed into the crook of her neck.

"Move down," she whispered, urging him lower. _Needing_ to comfort him in that nurturing spot close to her heart.

Head tucked, he did so, somehow naturally knowing she was guiding him down to rest in the valley between her breasts. Jacob nuzzled the base of each swell and then rooted under her left breast and released a long hitching sigh.

With his big heavy body draped over her, she held him -held his fear, his power, his pain - while she stroked soothingly over the nape of his neck. She could feel his heart beating hard and hollow against her stomach.

God, why couldn't anything be freaking _simple_? The hour was already half done and they'd barely made it to the bed!

And her body was burning.

She supposed it made sense though because things _weren't _simple. Not at all. This was real life and even under the _best _of circumstances it was messy and confusing and never gave you what you wanted the way you wanted it. There was no way they could have some la-la-la romantic interlude or even fix everything in a stupid hour with a doomsday clock ticking a countdown in the corner.

But they could make some progress on both fronts. They already had.

"Are you okay," she whispered, stroking her hand tenderly over his head.

He nodded imperceptibly against her.

"Open for me, honey," she urged, gently running a palm over his shoulder. The muscles felt like iron under the warm satin of his skin.

"I can't," he rasped. She wasn't the only one who had problems letting people in.

Bella sighed and pulled a thoughtful lip into her mouth. Glancing at the clock, she made a decision based on instinct.

"Roll over."

He didn't move.

"C'mon, roll over you big fat dorky wolf," she complained, pushing futilely at his massive shoulders.

Jacob picked his head up with a "what did you call me" raise of his brow. It seemed she could always count on that hair-trigger macho thing to at least get a rise out of him. She batted her lashes with a grin that made his eyes flick up to the ceiling. But he rolled over.

And that was the point after all.

Bella climbed on on top of him. She didn't quite know what to do with his... with that... that definitely-not-at-half-mast part of him so she caged it between her thighs as she crossed her ankles between his knees.

Jacob squeezed his eyes shut with a hiss and flare of his nostrils as Bella shimmied up his chest and hovered over him. And waited for them to open again. They finally did along with his mouth to offer some kinda lame excuse...

So she stopped him.

Without warning Bella smothered his shame and wrapped his fear in a cotton candy kiss.

Gauzy, delicate, sweet, she moved over Jacob's mouth like a gossamer dream. Honeyed breath clung to his skin as she brushed her candied lips over his, flicking her tongue out to taste him, nibbling on his lower lip, humming quiet rapture into his mouth. Her cooling hands slithered over his chest to his jaw.

And she held him.

Coaxed him back with a tender, nurturing femininity that seeped into his bones from her touch.

Soothed his mind with acceptance.

Quenched his soul with affection.

With a simple brush of her lips, Bella doused that inferno that was burning him alive.

Jacob's breath hitched, greedily jerking the succor of her life-breath into his lungs. She gifted it freely.

His hands shook as they ghosted up her sides and hovered over her shoulders.

'_I love you.' _Her pastel voice sifted through his mind.

Her connection had been slipping languidly in and out, through different layers of her mind from reassuring thought to comforting emotion, but, like she'd yanked a faucet closed, abruptly that stream of consciousness dried up.

Jacob's eyes frantically blinked open from where they'd drifted closed with blissful relief.

Slowly Bella pulled her lips from his with a soft smack. She rubbed her nose over his and then pulled back to stare down at him with steady amber eyes.

"I think it's too much," she pronounced quietly.

Jacob's gaze darted over her face as his hands rose to brush lightly over her head and he tried to understand with his fevered brain.

Bella's lips curved at whatever she saw in his face and she leaned forward to press her lips to his chin. "When we make love," she whispered, running her nose over the stubble on his jaw. "I think the connection's too much right now."

Jacob squeezed his eyes closed, ashamed at just how close he'd come to totally losing it and taking her like a rutting animal.

"And I _want _to make love, Jacob," she breathed, placing a soft kiss on his jaw.

His breath caught as a wave of molten heat washed over his body.

But deliciously slow and sweet, Bella was the perfect antidote. She pressed her lips over his cheek, along his pulse, under his chin.

Jacob's hands slipped down to her shoulders and he drew in shaking open-mouthed breaths. She felt _so incredibly fucking good_.

"We'll figure all this out," she murmured as she rubbed her cheek along his jaw.

It soothed his soul. He doubted she realized she was instinctually mimicking the lupine nuzzle of a mated pair.

"I mean, it's just you, Jake. And this is just another thing we're doing together, right?"

She tossed his own earlier words back at him and Jacob caught them with a jolt.

He _wasn't _alone anymore - he never had had to be, not really. He didn't have to feel shame or be the infallible Alpha who never showed weakness - not with her. She'd always been there for him and always would be. Just like he'd be for her. She was his mate, his imprint. But more importantly she was...

His eyes popped open and looked down the plane of his cheeks. She was watching him carefully as she dragged her lax lips to and fro over his chest, waiting.

Bella had always waited for him.

She picked her head up expectantly with an adorably candid expression of anticipation to see if her wily little ways had worked. Jacob's lips quirked as he stroked a finger over her cheekbone.

"My best friend," he whispered.

A brilliant smile lit her entire face (that was also not so subtly sparkling with triumph) and Jacob had to chuckle.

"And your mate," she arched a brow and then squeezed her thighs together.

Jacob hissed as his swollen cock, which had been waiting patiently (or not) throbbed in anticipation.

Bella smiled and sat up on his stomach, letting her legs fall to either side.

Jacob gasped in awe. What dream was this? His eyes hungrily devoured the sight of Bella, naked and straddling him with wet sexily rumpled hair hanging down over her delicate shoulders and pert breasts, smiling at him.

His hands slipped to her knees and smoothed over her thighs as they watched each other for a moment. Slowly she started rubbing her hot crotch over his stomach, back and forth, leaving a trail of fragrant narcotic wetness behind her.

The smile slipped from Jacob's lips like they were teflon.

_Ho-leee fuck._

Bella's gaze was darting over his face watching for his reaction even as a blush charged to her cheeks and melted down her chest.

_She was so brave._ He knew this was a million miles past her comfort zone, but still she was doing it. For him. For _them_. And not-so-coincidentally it was exactly what he needed right this moment.

Bella on top.

A slow smile blossomed on his lips as Jacob's strokes up her thighs became more purposeful.

"You're gorgeous," he breathed.

Her blush seemed to impossibly deepen as her eyes fell to his chest. "I have no freaking idea what to do," she sniffed looking back up with insecurity in her eyes.

_Fuck that. She shouldn't be feeling _that_. _

Jacob surged up and wrapped her in his arms capturing her lips with his in one fell swoop. She instantly melted in his arms and surrendered to his mouth with a little hum. _Shit, he loved that._

He broke the kiss and she leaned back a little as Jacob started stroking up and down her sides. "That's the thing, Bells, you do," he whispered. "You always know _exactly _what to do."

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth as his gaze took immaculate inventory of that beautiful face. "Alpha's mate," he breathed and then smothered her fledgling smile with a searing kiss.

Her hands slithered up to the back of his head and pull him down closer as his mouth siphoned little plaintive grunts from her throat. It was like picking up right where they left off.

His hands caressed down her back over her thighs and then back up her sides, kneading her into pliancy, pulling shudders up her spine, chill bumps from her skin, and buttery moans from the back of her throat. Slipping around front he rolled a straining nipple between his fingers and she arched into his touch, breaking the kiss with a low moan.

She was so sensitive, so receptive... it was so fucking awesome that he could coax these reactions from her just with his fingertips. Her body was like an instrument waiting to be played - and Jacob had always been good with his hands.

Those hands slowly slipped down to her hips while he pressed open-mouthed kisses over her cheek in a trail to her ear. "Ready, honey?" he whispered, combing her hair gently back over her shoulder.

"Sofreakingreadyyoudon'tevenknow," Bella gasped in a jumble.

Jacob chuckled darkly. "I think I do." The honeyed scent of her arousal was driving him fucking insane. It radiated from her skin and rose from between her legs on the humid heat between their bodies.

Jacob pulled her to his chest and she threw enthusiastic arms around his neck. Her mouth landed incidentally on his jaw and just stayed there, suckling and dragging her teeth across the stubble.

She was so light it was ridiculous. He lifted her up over his straining body and then lowered her slick satin heat over the burning tip of his cock. They both hissed and Jacob froze as the impulse to ram right on home rippled through his body like a shock wave.

Bella stopped her idle nibbling to collapse her forehead against his jaw as her hips slowly undulated, unconsciously trying to capture more of him. Wrapping one arm under her ass to support her, he leaned back a little and braced his hand behind him on the bed for leverage and pushed his hips deeper into her with little uneven jerks that spoke to his stuttering restraint. Each pump of his hips just whittled away another layer of control in little curls that tauntingly floated free leaving nothing but a thin, frayed veneer.

The feel of her tight little body fully sheathing him was even better than he'd remembered.

_Oh God. _Every cell in his body burst into flame.

He sat back up, frantically wrapping his arms around her as he leaned his cheek against her hair and tried to scrape together any scraps of forbearance left on the cutting room floor.

Bella, on the other hand, had pushed her face into his shoulder, panting softly while she adjusted. But already she was starting to stir. She began placing little slick jujube kisses against his skin and then rocked her hips experimentally.

Jacob groaned.

Bella's head jerked up with wonder sparkling in her eyes. "You felt that?"

"Um, yeah," he choked.

A breathtaking smile lit her face - and Jacob decided he could hold on a little longer. This was important, somehow he just knew. Instinct could be good for something.

Swallowing thickly as his mutinous body begged, pleaded, _demanded _more, he leaned in and ghosted his nose over her hair, breathing in desperate lungfuls of her soothing scent.

"I want you to find all the stuff that feels good so you can teach me," he murmured low as he placed a kiss on her hairline.

Bella jerked back her, her eyes washing up and down his face in panic (and incidentally clenching her body, making sparks ignite behind his eyes).

"What?" she squeaked.

"Shhh," he soothed as his palms rubbed over her shoulders and back down her back. Like magic, she melted under his touch and collapsed against his shoulder.

Jacob's lips curved in a gratified smile - something deep in his being _fucking loved_ that she responded to him like this.

"Did that feel good?" he whispered, nuzzling her head and coaxing her along with a little sprinkling of soothing lupine power.

"Did what feel good?" She brazenly slapped down the naivete card in a barefaced bid for more time.

Jacob chuckled into her hair. "What you did with your hips," he played along anyway.

Silence.

Jacob stroked his fingers through her hair a few times and then leaned back to see what was going on.

Bella had her lip pulled into her mouth and chin tucked.

"Bells?" he prompted gently.

She looked up at him with a squint. "Yeah," she admitted in a quiet little voice.

Jacob smiled and leaned in to kiss her forehead encouragingly. "That's awesome," he whispered over her skin as he ghosted his lips along her hairline. "Try some other things... maybe like up and down."

"Jake-..." she started.

"Just give it a try," he stopped her resistance before it could build steam. Pulling back, he looked into her eyes. She wanted to, she was just shy. "Want me to get you started?"

Continuing to bite the hell out of her lip, she nodded.

Jacob leaned in and pulled that lip free with his own in a kiss that went toward melting that insecurity. His hands slowly made their way down to her hips and then pulled her up his straining body. She broke the kiss with a gasp as he settled her back down.

And again. Bella closed her eyes with a sexy purse to her lips as she grabbed his shoulders and pulled her feet under her.

Like he'd primed her, on his next pull up, her legs were helping.

Jacob let her go.

And, oh, did she go.

Up then down, it only took a few times before those sturdy thighs started a rhythm like a piston building steam.

Holy _fucking _shit.

It was really just more than a wolf could take, and with a groan to the ceiling Jacob fell back to his elbows on the bed. Her tight heat dragging over his aching cock ignited every last nerve in his body like the Fourth of July.

It also, however, stoked the need to dominate - to flip them both over, push her down into the mattress and assert his dominion (and _insert _his cock) over and over - but he could live with that. She'd succeeded in soothing that lupine instinct enough that the impulse was a much more comfortable one. The rest of it was just inevitable. There were just some things he just couldn't change, after all. Even for her.

But he could delay them for a while.

Because he'd never imagined such an incredible fucking sight (well he had, but it hadn't even begun to do _this _justice). Bella, with a flush to her cheeks and her palms pressed against his abs, riding him with abandon while her wet hair bounced over jiggling creamy breasts.

There were no words...

What made it infinitely sexier was that she didn't even have a _clue _how hot she was. Her eyes were closed as her breath hitched over parted lips while her head tipped luxuriantly to the side - she was just lost in her pleasure.

_He wouldn't be able to wait much longer._

"You're so incredibly fucking sexy," he breathed, as the drive to take over (and take her) started creeping up gut with heated pressure.

Bella's eyes popped open like she'd forgotten where she was and the color deepened to her cheeks. Immediately that uncharacteristic coordination faltered. Jacob smiled, reaching his hands out to grab hers as she lost her balance and toppled backwards with an adorable sound (that he hadn't known was possible) that was a cross between a squeak and a moan.

Chuckling, he laced his fingers through hers and laid all the way back so he could steady her with their clasped hands.

Bella looked suddenly uncomfortable.

"You liked that, huh Bells?" Jacob gave her a reassuring smile. "What else feels good?"

She bit her lip and gripped his hands as she pushed slowly up his shaft and then slid just as slowly back down. Jacob's eyes closed as a growl escaped to be ground into submission by his molars.

"Is that a good sound?"

Jacob's eyes popped open to find her blinking back at him with a worried pucker between her brow. He gave her a wry and predatory smile. "It was a _very _good sound," he assured her in a black velvet voice.

Bella hitched a shoulder to her ear with a tentative smile. She absently rolled her her hips in an undulating wave that made his balls burn.

"How's that one?" he nearly wheezed.

Bella nodded her smile growing roots. "But when I was falling..." she leaned back, holding onto his hands. With a soft groan, she dragged her body up his while her eyelids fluttered. "This is _really _good," she breathed as her nostrils flared.

Her artless sexy sex expression made Jacob's hips jerked up on their own.

"Ooo," she squeaked, her eyes blinking back to his with a bright smile and innocence that just begged to be ravished.

_Okay, that's all he could take._

Sitting up, he tugged her into his chest by her hands. "My turn," he purred.

Bella tilted her head up and their lips automatically met in smacking kiss. "I wanna know what you like too, Jake," she insisted with a furrowed brow.

A slow smile curved his lips as Jacob slid a hand down to caress that smooth rounded ass. "Hold on."

Bella dutifully wrapped her arms around his neck and he turned them over and lowered her down to the bed.

"Honey, I'm a guy," he murmured, as he pushed up on his arms so he could see her while his hips started testing the waters. "All you gotta do is spread your legs."

"Thats-..."

Whatever she was going to say got usurped by a gasp as he sloooowly pulled nearly all the way out ... and then snapped back in.

It felt fucking amazing.

He did it again.

"Oh, God, Jake," she breathed as she gripped his forearms and looked up at him with wide eyes.

A wolfish smile curved his lips. And he did it again.

She tipped her hips up to meet him this time, wrapping her legs around his back.

And again -pulling out, slow and patient and then thrusting back into her fast. Over and over, until her eyes were glazed, her nipples beaded and her fingernails dug into his arms. It was a deeply satisfying vision - his heavy lids bobbed as a low purr wound through his innards.

_His mate. His._

"More, Jake," she gasped.

This had all been a bid at just drawing this thing out a little - he wouldn't last long after pretty much half an hour of foreplay (and 17 years of abstinence).

Stilling his hips, Jacob leaned down to those swollen rosy lips. With a little grunt, Bella's hand snapped up to pull him feverishly into sloppy impassioned kisses that turned his purr into a growl of pleasure.

He just had to... he _needed_ to ...

Jacob pulled away and pulled out as he sat up and Bella's eyes popped open with cry of dismay on both accounts.

"Shh." Wordlessly he held her captive with heated eyes he could feel expanding in their sockets as he grabbed a pillow and then motioned her up and stuffed it under her ass. He needed to see her, but he needed a better angle (not so coincidentally it just happened to be the angle that would hit that spot she'd liked).

"This okay?" Jacob whispered as he spread his knees and positioned his hands at the sexy swell of her hips.

Bella's new amber eyes returned his stare with trust and streaks of heated gold. She nodded and her hands came down to grasp his forearm.

Jacob took a steeling breath and entered her in one smooth stroke to the sound of her gratified hum.

Watching her closely, Jacob readjusted his grip and began pounding her in earnest, pushing syncopated moans of pleasure from her lips as he yanked her hips into each thrust with carefully tempered strength and the slap of skin. Again and again, in a rhythm that quickly became the hard and fast tempo of liberated need.

Bella's nails dug fiercely into his forearm as she started breathlessly chanting his name. Pushing him faster.

Harder.

Deeper.

Gritting his teeth over the growl that tumbled in his chest, Jacob yanked the pillow out and fell over her without breaking his rhythm. She arched off the bed to meet him and captured his thighs with her heels.

He needed to hold her, to be close.

She needed that too. With a breathy whimper Bella pressed her face into his shoulder and etched her approval into his back while Jacob pommeled instinct and craving and fate with blissful abandon. But far too soon, his hips stuttered as that telltale crescendo of heat rose like a summer swell. Jacob threw his head back with a groan.

But Bella was already gone. Her hoarse cry muffled in his shoulder, she tumbled over the edge and milked him right after. With growl and two jerks of his hips he pushed his seed as deeply as he could as blood pounded in his ears.

His body trembled with release as his forehead fell to the bed and a heady halcyon warmth surged through his blood like he'd feebased it.

It was such an odd sensation.

Foreign, really.

He couldn't remember the last time he felt...

_Peace_.

Stunned, for a moment he couldn't move. _This _is what it had felt like to be human.

Peace... for this blessed moment.

His father had been right: Bella was _exactly _what had been missing.

She'd _given _him this moment of respite that effortlessly refilled his barren reservoirs to the brim. She'd sheltered, nurtured and consoled him in her arms, in her body, between her breasts. She'd gifted a love that gave him the courage, strength _and hope_ to keep pushing on. Because no matter how crazy it got, no matter how impossible it became, no matter how grim it looked, there was always _this_.

This moment when he could empty his body. heart and soul.

This woman who'd fill him back up again.

Licking his lips, Jacob looked down his chest into the the space sheltered by the brace of his elbows. He saw the top of her head; Bella was still buried in his pec, clinging so fiercely to him that she held herself off the bed. He could feel the way her heaving breaths pulled at his skin.

Jacob closed his eyes a moment as his own breath caught up. He felt so good... _so incredibly fucking good_.

He hoped she did too.

" 'You okay, honey?" he asked quietly as he wrapped an arm around her and rolled them over.

Bella turned her head to rest her cheek over his heart for a moment with a long humming exhale that transformed somewhere along the way into a sigh.

Jacob pushed her sex-tangled hair from her cheek and smoothed a palm down her back and he waited. He'd always known when to wait.

Finally Bella drew in a breath and lifted her head with love in her eyes and a novocaine smile. "Better than okay," she whispered. "You?"

A slow wry smile hitched Jacob's lips as he nodded. "Better than okay," he mouthed silently as he stroked a cherishing finger down her cheek.

Bella sniffed and caught his hand, bringing it to her lips. With a little contented sigh she pushed it down over his heart and pillowed her cheek on the back of it.

And for a few minutes or hours - Jacob didn't know and didn't care - they just lay there, silently, together: his hand stroking absently over her cheek while she drew invisible designs around his nipple.

They'd always been good like that. Together was enough - they never had to fill the space with words.

Of course now, thanks to their bond, they _really _didn't have to - even if they had something to say - but their gifts were something that could wait for another day to figure out... along with instincts and insecurities and the rest of it all.

Right now they took this moment. A moment to simply bask in one another. In satisfied bodies, full hearts, bound souls and the silence of true friendship.

But all moments come to an end. It wasn't always a bad thing.

As the minutes ticked by, finally Bella drew in a resetting breath and lifted her cheek from Jacob's chest with a pastel smile. Jacob returned it easily - she was starting to get his mouth used to it again.

Pulling her lip into her mouth, her eyes darted to the clock and then back to his. Jacob sat up a little as their gazes locked.

Their words tumbled over each other in unison:

"Wanna do it again?"

'

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Review if you like.


	17. Acceptance

_Before I get into some heavier housekeeping items, I want to call your attention to a beautiful manip done by West Coast Angel. I think it's one of my all time faves in the fandom and was inspired by last chapter. plus**DOT**google**DOT**com/photos/112163073516571740999/albums/5840925857079077825_

_'_

_This chapter, while a fair length as far as fanfiction goes, is _significantly _shorter than you're used to. _

**So, I propose this Plan:**_ Posting a chapter a week for this month (at whatever length they end up) with a plan to finish by the end of Feb. The chaps will be rougher than the usual and will probably be more set up like a series of vignettes/scenes that are the emotional pressure points of the story (like this chapter) to tie Jake's tale up neatly. _

_Thanks to Tayjayfan for untiring emotional support._

_Your notes are always appreciated!_

_'_

_As always, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy._

'

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**Chapter 17 - Acceptance**

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'

Jacob crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned against the door frame.

And he watched.

Across a time-worn kitchen he'd known all his life, his gaze caressed the willowy curves of a woman he'd known just as long and loved infinitely longer. Her back to him, Bella leaned against the counter and absently stirred her coffee, obviously lost in her thoughts and somewhere else entirely. He listened to the breathy tuneless song she murmured over the soothing clink of stainless steel on ceramic that wrapped him in comfort. He felt the soothing hum of simply being near her that soaked into the coiling tension in his gut and coaxed it lax. And he drew in a long deep breath of her lush creamy fragrance that was the scent of peace incarnate.

In an instant, all the anxiety and adrenaline that had started leaching fire back into his veins was snuffed out by just that scent and the solace of her proximity. He'd missed her - even though it had been no more than five minutes since she'd kissed him after rinsing off (by herself - they both knew what would happen if they got into the shower together). She'd gotten dressed and come downstairs while he'd wrangled with his Pack.

With each passing minute their Alpha kept them waiting, his wolves grew more restless and it was starting wear Jacob thin. This afternoon was going to be complicated enough without the added stress of nine minds all broadcasting their personal agitation. So, with subtle compulsion and heat he'd calmed them down (again) and pushed all but the cubs and Quil - who he'd sent to patrol on this safe sunny day - to phase back to human. Sam had taken a little more attention.

But now they could fucking wait.

Just a little longer so he could revel in a few more moments with this woman.

_His _woman... _his_.

With that delectable sweetening scent. His eyes slipped up those long shapely legs bared by a pair of frayed jeans cut-offs that served up that ass perfectly. Over those feminine hips that he'd held in the span of his hands as he'd pounded his craving into her body. Up that slender waist to the long mahogany fall of damp curls that made his balls burn. He could wrap it around his fist as his hips slammed into her from behind and she arched into his grip with a cry for more...

Blinking rapidly at the disconcerting punch of lupine hormones along with pure feral lust, Jacob pulled his lip into his mouth and bit hard enough to draw blood. He lapped at the sobering rust as he reined in the instinct that was inextricably a part of who he was now. An instinct he was slowly (finally) starting to accept.

He'd spent as much of the last half an hour in her body as he could, pushing his need into her hunger and greedily gulping her sighs over his insatiable lips. But Bella met and raised his passion with as much of her own... yet with a delicate frame that commanded tempered strength, a soothing sensuality that slowed him down and a liquid femininity that brought him back every single time he started to lose himself to the fire that burned in his soul.

The more time he spent touching her body - being _in _her body - the more she sated, soothed and balanced the beast. Without even knowing it, she was helping him make a measure of peace with the savagery that boiled his blood and that had truthfully scared the shit out of him since that first crack of bones. Because Bella had proven time and time again that she could not only handle him, but that she'd love him and stand at his side, no matter what kind of monster duty and destiny forced him to be.

Jacob was _finally _starting to accept himself.

And it seemed impossible that outside of the grotto of her body - outside this sanctuary of pleasured need and bound souls and healing hearts - was a Pack that needed leading, a people who needed protecting, and a demon that could lay waste to it all.

So for yet another stolen moment, he watched.

He let both instinct and man drink in all that he had to loose and let it simmer in his heart, stoking the fires of resolve: his soul's imprint, his body's mate, his best friend. This precious woman who had not only gifted love, balance and redemption, but had saved him from himself. There was no question (there never had been): he'd fight for her to the death.

And that death would certainly not be his own.

"What are you thinking, Jacob Black," her whisper slunk across the room and wound up his body milking a double beat from his heart.

With a soft smile he pushed off the doorway and prowled silently across the worn linoleum. Of course she could feel him the same as he could her - somehow just as surely as another limb.

As soon as he grew near, she straightened and took a step back into him as if they were simply two parts of something coalescing back into one. Jacob's hand automatically wound around that slender waist while the other brushed her hair back over a shoulder as he bent down.

"How much I want to be inside you again," he murmured over her skin as he dragged his lips up her pulse. It was a deflection but from now on there'd never be another second when it'd be a lie.

Bella tipped her head with a now familiar honeyed sigh that instantly awoke his body. He drew in a long steeling breath of her scent, relishing the way it was now entwined with the pungent virile undertones of his mark. A soft rumble awoke in Jacob's gut.

_Fuck, that smelled so incredibly good. _

His scent had seeped into her blood and now radiated from her skin and it was a big fat fucking neon sign - that would subconsciously warn even a clueless human male - that she was taken. And by someone who'd be lethal to cross.

"Mmm," Bella hummed softly. "That's only _part_ of the story..."

Of course he'd never been able to get away with half truths even before all this. Jacob chuckled low as his tongue traced over the dark purple mark staining the side of her neck and she sucked in a breath of pleasure. It was as sick as the rest of it, but he _liked _this here - he couldn't really say why.

He moved his lips up to that sweet spot just behind her ear. "Bells, I think you' got a lil' hickey here," he whispered.

"Oh my God Jake, that's _so way freaking beyond_ a _'little _anything!'" Bella laughed, turning around and looping her arms around his waist as he straightened, unable to keep his lips from a satisfied smile. "My dad's gonna have a cow."

And there it was. A little trickle of the stress that lurked below the surface of their bliss. His smile flickered as reality tried to beat down the door of these last hallowed minutes.

Bella's eyes washed over his face and she pressed her lips together. "Want some coffee?" she asked quietly - doing her best to take step back.

Jacob decided to help her as he again bent down. "Yeah, I would," he breathed before he took her lips in a kiss that pointedly carved the beverage from her mouth.

But she melted so deliciously under his demand and that little hum in the back of her throat was so incredibly intoxicating, that almost instantly that teasing kiss softened into something serious and sensual. His hands slipped down to her waist and he lifted her tiny frame up to the counter as their mouths slowed into the sultry sway of simmering passion.

"Mmm," he crooned, pulling his lips away with a soft smack. "Good coffee." His eyes darted over that beautiful face, neurotically surveying every memorized pore to make sure nothing had changed in his five minute absence.

Bella gave him a dreamy smile and Jacob's eyes snapped up to hers as his lips curved in resonance. Tenderly he pushed her hair behind each ear.

He made her feel good. **He** did. Jacob had never thought he'd see this part of himself again - the part that could make people happy... the part that could make _her _happy.

A gurgling growl interrupted the moment, and Bella's arm snapped around her waist as a sunrise blush rose to her cheeks.

"Hungry there, Bells?" Jacob's smile turned into a grin. "Let's get you something to eat."

Bella wrinkled her nose. "There's not really time."

"Sure there is," he gave her a sultry wink that made that flush darken deliciously. The stress of this week had worn on them both and he didn't like that she looked so thin - he'd _make _fucking time.

His hands tightened on her hips as she moved to jump down. "I got it," he murmured.

Bella opened her mouth to protest - she'd always been pretty territorial in the kitchen.

"Plus I need to talk to you about a few things," he quickly interrupted. Because he did. Several important things, not the least of which being where she would be sleeping tonight and every night after.

Curiosity ignited in those striking new eyes, promptly shutting her mouth with a soft pop. Jacob chuckled and pressed a kiss to her nose.

"So this meeting," he began without preamble as he crossed to the refrigerator and his mind slipped ruefully back into reality and duty. "It's gonna be kinda intense." He tugged open the fridge and pulled out a pizza box and peeked inside to see combined the leftovers.

He turned with a questioning raise of his brow. "Breakfast of champions?" That had been their nickname for the cold leftover pizza they traditionally ate after one of their epic late nights of B movies and junk food.

Bella smiled distractedly and gave him a little nod.

So it only made sense they'd continue the practice after epic sex. He smiled to himself as he pulled out the pizza. "Want something else to drink?" he called over his shoulder.

"Uhn-uh... Intense how?" Bella's analytical mind was already back in the game.

Jacob grabbed the milk carton and drew in a deep breath as he turned around, meeting her worried gaze.

"Since my dad just took over, it's going to be kinda... y'know, ceremonial," he continued crossing back to her and placing the pizza box on the counter as he watched the thoughts process furiously behind her gaze.

"The new Chief is getting acknowledged by the Alpha and..." Jacob set the milk down on her other side and spun his fingers in the air. "The other way around. Leadership shit... even though it's just my dad." Jacob didn't know when all this had come so naturally or how he'd learned to play these games. It was just something that was innate in him now.

Bella's hands started twisting in the hem of her tee shirt and he covered them reassuringly with his own as he stepped between her knees. "And I've got to officially present my mate to the Council," he whispered, capturing her gaze with intensity. "The Alpha's mate."

Bella pulled a shoulder to her ear as she wrinkled her nose uncomfortably.

"It's a big thing, Bells. _You're _a big thing..." he murmured looking intently into her eyes. "For all of us."

"Old Quil didn't think so," she snorted, rolling her eyes and letting them fall to the floor. It was really just a deflection courtesy of insecurity, but even still it ripped a deep, gravelly growl from Jacob's diaphragm.

Bella's eyes jerked back up to his, blinking in surprise.

Jacob's nostrils flared, but his hand was gentle and steady as he raised a finger to her cheek and ghosted it down over her jaw. "Old Quil's an _arrogant fucking prick_," he bit out crisply, the pressure of controlled heat making the words bulge. "Who doesn't give a _fuck _about anything except himself." His lips flashed reflexively up from his canines.

Bella didn't so much as blanche from what he was pretty sure was undisguised lupine fury simmering in his features. In fact, her redemptive hand came up to cover his on her cheek as her eyes paced between his.

"It's a good thing Billy took over," she whispered in a soothing pastel voice as she turned into his palm. For a moment she pressed soft sweet kisses over his lifeline that easily siphoned off that steam.

Just her touch, the pull of her breath, her scent... Jacob felt his shoulders imperceptibly soften as he drew in a deep breath of the peace she so freely offered.

His other hand came up to gratefully cup her jaw like the life line she was. "I don't know why it took my dad so damn long to step up," he muttered petulantly with considerably less fire as he leaned down and pressed lips to her temple in as close to an apology as he could muster.

With a final kiss to the heel of his hand, Bella turned back out of his palm and captured his gaze with a soft smile.

And Jacob's breath caught in his throat.

For a moment, he just stared at her, stunned. There was such love in her eyes and it was the kind that had to be cultivated over a lifetime. She knew everything - all the doubt and fear that shadowed his heart, the wildness and rage that infected his soul - and still she was here.

Choosing him.

Like a fist to the gut, it really hit him then: Bella, the girl he'd loved all his life (and somehow even before) was _his_. They were standing in her kitchen, together, after binding their souls, speaking their hearts and having mind-blowing _sex_. He'd been the first to be inside her body and he'd be the last.

Like whiplash, a wave of overwhelm broke over his head and Jacob's eyes started to burn.

_Oh hell to the fucking no_.

He jerked those incriminating eyes from hers as he turned to the pizza box and opened the lid, grounding his emotions in cold pizza. The Alpha in him simply wouldn't let him break down in front of her - even if he knew she'd understand.

So instead, he turned back to her with a lame offering of mushroom pizza while he became extremely busy digging out a slice of pepperoni for himself.

Bella took the pizza from him with a knowing smile that Jacob judiciously ignored as he took a huge wolfy bite and watched her out of the corner of his eye.

But her gaze grew thoughtful as it fell absently to the slice in her hand. "But Jake," she said quietly, looking back up. "I think your dad was _waiting _for _you _- that's why he took so long."

Jacob's jaw froze mid-chew as he blinked at her, like an idiot.

"Like, maybe wanting to be there if you needed him? Waiting for you to stop fighting?" she ventured with an earnest furrow to her brow.

Jacob's eyes darted between hers as his mind processed every conversation and clue over the last year. _That _was the missing piece - his dad hadn't been sitting on the sidelines, blissfully unaware and unconcerned, he'd been waiting for Jacob to grow into his power with the calm neutrality that was his hallmark. Which was _exactly _the best way to handle a young congenital Alpha. He nodded brusquely and started chewing again.

Because now with Billy the Chief and Jacob the Alpha their relationship was going to immutably change.

So of course she was right - she'd always been so insightful when it came to people. The strategist in him appreciated it as the awesome asset to the Pack that it was but the _man _was simply grateful to have another set of eyes he trusted. In fact, maybe she could help him figure out how to deal with his wolves right now.

Honestly, they were driving him fucking nuts.

Especially after totally losing it and basically abandoning his Pack - not to mention showing ridiculously unacceptable weakness - he was going to have to figure out how he could get them shored up fast so they were solid for this next play.

And it wouldn't be easy.

Sam had taken two steps back but at least he was human, so all progress wasn't lost. Jacob had had to force the change on him (which he now had the power to do) but Emily had kept him there. Natural dominant that he was, Paul (like Sam) had gone his own brand of crazy in Jacob's absence which included throwing his fist in Jared's face... repeatedly. Only Leah - incongruous girl and consummate bitch - had been able to step into that one. Embry was the only one of them who at least outwardly kept his even calm, but it was only because it masked the way he was crumbling inside.

They all needed to be on their game like never before and each of his core team were all frighteningly close to losing it. Wolves _needed _containment to stay in control - that's why they were going as ape-shit as they were. They were all programmed to be killing machines: supernatural monsters that could take out the demonic walking dead. At every moment they needed to be close enough to the killing frenzy that was necessary to protect their people from an enemy that was as heartless and horrifying as it was the ultimate predator.

And all that innate power and feral rage without someone strong enough to rein them in? It spelled disaster.

"Show me," Bella's whisper pulled him from his thoughts..

Jacob's eyes darted up to find Bella watching him carefully. She'd read him - it was getting dangerously easy to let his guard down around her.

"Show me how they're going crazy," Bella pressed with a little cock of her head.

Jacob drew in a breath and then released it with a slow nod. He _wanted _to show her - he wanted (needed) to get her insight and opinion. It just seemed unfair to pile all that chaos on her right now - it was some painful shit to watch.

"It's okay, Jake," Bella whispered cannily, making his eyes dart up from where they'd absently slipped down to her neglected pizza in her hand resting on her thigh (he'd decimated his own in three measly bites).

With a sad smile, he wordlessly took the pizza from her hand and brought it up to her lips. Bella's eyes darted over his face, looking for clues, before she took a bite.

"Yeah on the ride over I can show you what's been going on," he said absently as he watched her chew like it was more riveting than the last few minutes of the Superbowl with a tied score (it pretty much was). "Y'know their memories and shit."

Bella kicked her feet a few times. "You mean like with our thing?" she checked with a little unconscious point toward her temple.

Her expression was an adorable mix between tempted and terrified. Jacob chuckled. "Yep," he leaned down and pressed his lips to her forehead. "Our thing." And then brought up a thumb to wipe away the tomato sauce smudge from his lips.

Her feet unconsciously looped around his legs, pulling him insecurely closer as she took the pizza from his hands and took a more enthusiastic bite.

"I want to see how it is being connected with you when I'm the wolf," he whispered, reaching in for the last slice of pepperoni.

Bella choked on her mouthful, her eyes jerking up to his.

Jacob's lips twitched at that stricken expression. "Whattaya think about letting me give you a _ride _to this meeting?"

"On your wolf!?" The words burst over Bella's lips, precariously close to bringing some of her pizza with them. She snapped a palm up over her mouth while Jacob chuckled at her expense.

She scowled at him and he valiantly tried to smother his laughter. "It's the fastest way to get there and we're already late," he tipped his head. "_And_ it makes a point that needs to be made after all this crap."

Bella's indignation dissolved in interest. "What point?"

And the levity was suffocated by the sheer weight of his reality now. _Their _reality. He wished it was different but it wasn't and he needed her to understand. Jacob drew in a breath and released it on a sigh of resignation and Bella's expression instantly morphed into attentive concern..

"I gotta be what they need me to be Bells. And wolves need an Alpha they can't dominate," he stated evenly, his voice automatically dipping down to its bass register. "And - even though it's my dad - there's still others on the council who don't get it. Who'll never get it. So they gotta be controlled by fear."

Bella was listening intently, that sincere pucker between her brows as she set the crust of her pizza down.

"So if we make some grand wolfy entrance... " She gently urged him on - showcasing her astute deconstruction. He didn't know why he'd ever wasted time wondering whether she would understand.

Jacob shot her a wan smile. "It makes it pretty clear that you're _mine_," he raised a pointed brow. "And that I'm strong enough to rip out any of their fucking throats if they cross me," he simply couldn't help that the sentence ended up shredded by bared teeth.

Bella squinted inadvertently under the sheer igneous force of the statement, but still her little hands reached out to cover his. Her touch was like a blessed healing balm on that hair-trigger rage. Jacob's eyes darted over her face as he drew in a breath and released it slowly like steam as lupine dominion submitted to the only force on the planet that could contain it.

_His imprint, his mate, his very best friend._

Jacob's eyes fluttered closed as he searched deep within himself for the balance and temperance that she was slowly building within him. With a demon on the loose, threatening both mate and everything he held dear, with a council that still was ambivalent and afraid, and a Pack that was teetering on the ragged edges - he'd need to keep it together like no other time in his life.

His eyes popped open to see Bella smiling softly at him - just happily waiting patiently for him to get his shit together. She'd always waited for him. And it was so fucked up that she had to deal with all this… that she had to deal with _him_.

"I wished you weren't all tangled up in my shit, Bells," he whispered - a glimmer of his old self loathing sneaking back in to make a cameo.

"Jake, I _want _to be. I'm all in, remember?" she declared passionately, earnestness tugging at her brow. "You don't have to do all this crap alone anymore."

Jacob froze, his eyes darting intensely between hers. _He was such a fucking __**fucking **__lucky bastard._

"God, I love you," he breathed.

A gorgeous smile lit that beautiful face as her arms looped up around his neck.

"Love you more," she whispered leaning up and offering those candy-apple lips, his for the taking.

_How could he resist?_

But her taste and scent and that soft little groan was like an intravenous narcotic that went straight to his brain. The pizza fell from his fingers as his arms wound covetously around her little body at the same time her legs wrapped around his hips. Just where they belonged.

_The counter was just a little too high, but the kitchen table..._

"We're already late..." Bella mumbled into his mouth as Jacob turned with her in his arms and crossed the kitchen.

Jacob smiled against her kisses as he swept last night's pizza box, cheese packets and plates haphazardly to floor. "Then we can be a little later, huh Bells?"

'

'

'_Are you ready?'_

The mental words rose, ethereal like heat on the pavement, over the vivid imagery playing like a movie in Bella's mind's eye. Even Jacob's mental voice was different in his lupine form - dusky, deep, and shimmering with power like the sound of ancient trees bending in the wind. Bella's hands dug into the thick wiry fur as she pressed her face deeper into the fragrant ruff of the animal's neck, hiding from being ready, in point of fact.

She had her eyes closed against the sickening speed, but right here, nestled in his pelt between his rolling shoulder blades and with her bare feet gripping his ribs, she barely felt like she was moving at all. The wolf's huge muscled body undulated under her with such grace and fluidity it felt like she was flying while her whole body hummed like summer locusts just from his touch.

Holy crap, she felt freaking amazing.

Okay, _now _she was a little sore, but the discomfort barely registered on the scale because pleasure's bar had been raised so high. But still she craved. Just for the touch of his hands, the taste of his breath, the way he moved inside her, the way his arms held her tight. It made her soul weep and her body burn.

She hadn't been too sure about the whole Bella-the-klutz-riding-a-giant-wolf thing, but Jacob had so much weighing on his shoulders already, she didn't want to add more. So she'd squared her jaw and followed him bravely out to the back yard.

But when he phased and opened his mind, all reticence simply melted in awe.

It had been hard to think about Jacob and the wolf _not_ being two separate entities, but now Bella was truly starting to understand that it was really part who he was now: the two distinct parts of him were as inseparable as emotion and reason in herself.

Jacob's lupine mind was more visceral, full of vivid images and mind-blowing detail: an imperceptible set of tracks left by a rabbit in the dirt, the scent of a man who'd passed weeks ago, the sound of a bird half a mile away.

But at the center of it all -_ all the time_ - was a myopic focus on _Bella herself_.

She had nearly been brought to her knees by the intense devotion the beast had for her as his imprint: he was always focused on where she was, how she was doing, whether she was happy and healthy and safe. He coveted and cherished her and would tear anything to ribbons that made her unhappy without a shred of remorse. He yearned for her touch and craved her scent and ached to curl at her feet and lap up the peace she offered.

Jacob undeniably loved her with all of his heart - she knew that now - but this magnificent supernatural creature who was part and parcel of his very being did too... and had since the beginning of time.

' '_You okay, honey?'_ the words wound through her mind with the soft brush of velvet, colored indigo with concern. But It was only when Jacob sent her the warm wet sensation of tears seeping through his fur that she realized she was crying.

Bella sniffled and nodded briskly against that sleek pelt.

The wolf's flowing sprint slowed to a rippling trot and the animal chuffed softly with a toss of his head.

"I'm okay," she whispered soggily, smoothing her hand over the beast's fur. It was pretty unconvincing, so she opened her mind more to him, showing him the choking flood of adoration and awe that was pushing her heart dangerously close to its bursting point.

A soft contented rumble immediately awoke under her thighs as Jacob's affection wrapped around her like one of his old magical hugs. And Bella was glad - glad that she could make both wolf and man feel as loved as she did.

So for these last stolen moments before reality hit - and hit hard - Bella basked in simply being with him. She cherished riding the silent sway of his gait, feeling the slip and slide of his warm sleek fur against her skin surrounded in the spicy comfort of his scent, watching the richly-hued imagery play like dreams in his lightning lupine mind.

'_We're almost there,'_ Jacob's human words seemed regretful as they again filtered up through wolvish sight and sensation. _' 'You ready for this?'_

But at the same time the bright images and sensations abruptly stopped and Bella's head jerked up as she blinked her eyes open to the green, green woods around them. They looked so different through her measly human eyes - more like a washed out replica. But she had to say, she was glad it wasn't that double-vision thing of earlier.

'_I'm keeping that offline for now.'_ Jacob's voice cannily threaded her confusion. _'We can work on it later, but it takes awhile to figure out how to deal with two visuals.'_

Bella nodded absently as her gaze darted over the forest around her and she acclimated back to her own senses.

_This was it_.

Her first real foray into standing beside him. The first step into the future and the rest of their lives. Her first chance to help him and heal some of the many things and people that were broken.

_No pressure at all, _she thought wryly.

She was glad she was a natural at control, as he'd said, because even with Jake she still needed to have a place that was just _hers_. Like this place right here: this weak, frightened, doubting place. Because no matter what magic had bound them, given them gifts and more,, it still couldn't change the fact that she was only an almost-18-year-old girl who had taken the biggest most hugest leap of faith of her entire life.

Strangely, there was something reassuring about this fear. Because she wasn't trying to be something she wasn't, she wasn't trying to ignore how scary parts of this were or gloss over the rough parts. She was an ordinary, flawed, clumsy girl taking her first steps out as a woman who'd been called to do impossible things beside a man who bore the weight of a world on his shoulders.

And Bella was more than alright with that.

Drawing in a deep breath, she sat up on the back of Jacob's wolf, fisting her hands in his fur while her feet kept their death grip on his ribcage. It was a little (a lot) more intimidating to be sitting up straight like this with open eyes - well over six feet off the ground. Squaring her shoulders, Bella swallowed thickly.

"I'm ready," she whispered.

'

* * *

'

_Review if you like._


	18. Becoming

_Note: I hate hijacking a People's traditions, so I try to avoid making up fake customs whenever possible. I needed to a little here, so disclaimer: This is fiction, fantasy and has nothing to do with the Quileute Nation's ways. In fact, fantasy-ritual here is roughly based on some Asian, Arabic and Polynesian customs._

_Thanks to Tayjayfan just for being there._

'

_As always, thanks for reading (and hanging in there) and hope you enjoy._

'

* * *

**18 - Becoming**

* * *

'

"I have one last announcement to make to the Council."

Jacob's deep imperious bass rolled over Bella like summer thunder and a different, more prickling silence seemed to wash over the Uley's back yard like rain. Or maybe it was just the rush of blood to her head and white noise of panic.

_This was it._

"The Alpha has imprinted."

She was surprised to feel Jacob's warm hand slip to the small of her back with a palpable possessiveness. It soothed them both.

"And his imprint has accepted."

The sparking heat of their bond shimmied up Bella's stiff spine and she released a slow silent breath through her nose. It was the first time that he'd reached out to her in this form and Bella's skin had been literally _aching _for his touch.

The wolf, however, hadn't had a problem in the world with flagrantly marking her as _his _in plain sight of whoever had dared look - a snuffle in her hair, a lap at her neck, a bump of his jaw.

But since Jacob had phased back, the man had kept both his hands and his eyes to himself. Not a glance from that hard incendiary stare. Not a whisper from that focused mind. Not a flicker of emotion - or anything else - trickled through that stern obsidian facade.

But Bella understood.

She could _feel _the battle he was waging with his own aggravated instinct along with his Pack's precariously waning control. Yet piled onto that pyre was the inflammatory tinder of pomp, circumstance, and contention (and a subtle and surprising testing of power by his father).

Basically, saying this meeting was _intense _was the freaking understatement of the century.

From an explosive pandemonium right on down to solemn Quileute ritual, they'd hit every pressure point in between. Bella felt like she had whiplash.

But she had done her best to keep her chin up and her mind open (to him - he'd asked her to for her perspective). However there was simply nothing she could do about the humiliating blush that had stained her cheeks since she'd first ridden into this yard on the back of a giant russet wolf.

When Jacob had said everyone was here, he'd pretty much meant _everyone_. Only Quil, Collin and Brady were missing - patrolling, Jacob had told her. But knowing now that everything he did in this sphere was calculated, she certainly could guess why. Jacob hadn't wanted Quil to have to take sides in this thing (or see his grandfather nearly get his face chewed off, there was that too).

This meeting had been at times messy and frightening and worrisome and nerve-wracking … but intimidating every step of the way. Yet Jacob hadn't held her hand, coddled or comforted - he'd shown that he had complete faith in her ability to stand at his side through all of it. Bella had never in her life been given such sovereignty and trust.

Literally standing beside Jacob - as his clearly implied equal - in his all full and fluent glory?

It was something she wouldn't trade for the world.

"I present to you my mate," The timber of that sonorous bass imperceptibly changed and Bella glanced up to find him watching her. For the first time since they'd stepped into the ring (and Sam and Emily's backyard) their eyes met.

And for a moment it was simply Jake n' Bells.

"Bella Swan," his lips caressed her name in a deep midnight velvet that sent shivers up her spine.

But those yawning pupils (open for an instant) contracted like he'd flipped switch and Jacob returned his attention to the Council across the lawn. His warm hand, her life preserver, slipped back down to his side.

Bella's gaze darted back out to 24 silent sets of eyes pinning her like a butterfly to a biologist's wax tray.

She had watched the _wolf _command every last head to bow in submission and then she'd watched the _man _stand proud, chin high, while he negotiated everything from his father's covert spar to the fluid ceremonial Quileute.

Now it was her turn.

Bella felt like she was trying to swallow a golf ball, as her gaze swept the silent yard. The same eleven of the Council from yesterday sat on fold up chairs in a long row across the porch not forty feet away. Seated off to the side (near, oddly enough, the imprints) was her father who she judiciously tried to ignore. The Pack was sitting in two tense lines in the grass - three on either side of the porch steps.

And every single one of them was _staring_... _at her_.

"Bella," Billy's baritone shimmied across the yard. Her gaze snapped to the man she'd always thought of as a second father sitting in his wheelchair at the top of the stairs. But with broad shoulders subtly pulled back, putting tension and a palpable dominion into that dispassionate facade, right now he was just as intimidating as the rest of this.

He nodded once.

Bella knew what was expected of her - she'd seen Leah and Seth go through a similar ritual minutes earlier when they were officially announced as Pack. She was grateful Jacob had waited to do this until the end so she had at least _somewhat _of a clue. But then again, it hadn't been by accident. Nothing he did now was.

Lifting her chin, she wiggled her toes out of the trench they'd been nervously digging in the grass, forced her habitually twisting hands to her side... and took a purposeful step.

And then another, making her stride sure and true.

_Oh God, __**please **__don't trip Bella._

Luckily lowered eyes were the ceremonial custom and her gaze found her feet as they continued valiantly on. But it felt like one of those horrible dreams - like time had slowed down and she was moving but getting nowhere.

_And the porch seemed a jazillion miles away._

The soft rustle of grass on her bare feet. A dog barking in the distance. Her hitching breath and her heart trying to pound to freedom up her throat.

_Oh God..._

_Steaks and fried chicken. That was the fastest thing to cook for a Pack of wolves. _She'd told Jake that the Pack should all sit down to dinner tonight.(Jake had said she was a brilliant strategist but since when was dinner considered some tactical plan?)

Her mind fumbled desperately with the shopping list, the menu, holy crap, _anything _to distract herself from those hard, unreadable eyes staring across a distance that didn't seem to be shortening _at all_.

She'd closed her connection with him, but still she could _feel _that her anxiety was dangerously ramping Jake up behind her. Like a pressure cooker, for the first time this afternoon scraps of his thoughts escaped on the steam.

_He scented her fear. He craved to follow. He didn't want her anywhere near Old Quil (should have fucking killed him when I had the fucking chance). _

Ripples of power radiated off him in waves like an incendiary backdraft from the battle he waged with the beast.

Releasing a long slow breath of stress, her feet continued on.

Past a lone dandelion.

Past two abandoned beer bottles.

Past the churned up earth from Jacob's powerful hindquarters.

Only several minutes after they'd arrived, and with no more warning than a savage roar, his wolf had leaped both these last twenty feet along with the rail of the porch. In a single fluid movement that was simply too fast for the human eye, the beast landed in a snarling crouch over Old Quil.

His canines poised at the man's throat with exacting precision.

Then, of course, all hell had broken loose.

As his last childish power play Old Quil had defiantly refused to follow what every last person at that meeting had instinctively done (including her father) and lower his eyes to the wolf's sweeping assessment. (Suffice it to say, he hadn't so much as glanced at Jacob since.)

It had taken Billy at least 15 minutes to calm down the frenetic Council and Bella almost as long to soothe Jacob back into his moderately safer human form. But surprisingly, in the maelstrom of human hysterics and chaos, distant howls and snarling Pack, Bella was like the eye of a hurricane. Jacob's dire need kept her calm in the center of it all.

Because he'd never forgive himself if he went too far - and if that happened, she might never get him back. So while Pack battled the phase, the Council fell over their chairs trying to get out of the way, and a rabid hulking wolf bore down on an old man gagging on his terror...

Bella had simply closed her eyes.

She'd forced the tension from her shoulders and bathed them both in memories of human comfort: holding his cheek to her breast... her nude body wrapped in his strong arms... a tender caress... a soft drag of lips...

She didn't know how long she'd stood there until a gentle bump against her cheek had her eyes pop open to a sober yellow stare. With an unrepentant chuff (that maybe even sounded a little smug, come to think of it) the beast had then proceeded to happily take a snuffling inventory and lap at the side of her neck (and the man's huge-assed hickey).

Bella unconsciously smiled at the memory.

Movement out of the corner of her eye brought her back, and she glanced up to find her feet were already at Pack ranks lined up at the foot of the stairs. Embry, covertly watching her from under the silky fringe of his hair, offered her a wilted version of one of his cashmere smiles. Sitting cross-legged in the grass, his eyes looked tired and sad.

Bella put a little more umph into the curve of her lips.

But it was just the reminder she needed: _this _was why she was doing what she was. _This _was why she was wandering a gazillion miles past her comfort zone and being the center of attention. It was why she wasn't crumbling only seconds away from ascending stairs where a bunch of stony faced old men (and women) were staring her down. It was why instead of feeling sorry for herself she was worrying to death about the desperate struggle of the man behind her.

She was doing it all for this pain.

Jacob, Embry, Sam... all of them. They were suffering piteously and it just wasn't fair. She loved them all (obviously differently) and there was something really powerful in True Love. It made you want to speak up and make a difference, to put your own discomfort and needs aside. It made you want to bet your life and your future - everything you had - on unequivocal faith in your heart.

And make no mistake, Bella loved Jacob _truly_.

As certainty settled over her like an old favorite flannel shirt, Bella lifted her chin with new purpose. She was listing to one side in her path to the stairs quite simply because the other one had _Leah. _ And while Jacob publicly recognizing her and Seth the way he had had replaced some of that contempt with confusion - Bella just didn't need to deal with her right now.

So next up was Paul His eyes were darting up from under a furrowed brow, fear, defiance or both - she couldn't tell - hardening his eyes and mouth. Jacob had shown her just a couple of heartbreaking snatches of the childhood memories he carried and she understood him a lot better now.

Her little capricious wink caught one those glances like a fishhook. She watched complex emotions flop and flail in his eyes until finally they wiggled free and fell to the ground.

Sam was the only one of them who wasn't faking ceremonial deference. His eyes were myopically locked on her with a subtle wildness pulling the pupils wide.

After they'd made their grand wolfy entrance, (and with regal lupine bearing and a rumbling warning growl that sounded like it had rent the earth, it had been one indeed) the wolf had folded down to it's haunches to let her down in the middle of the large yard. With barely human eyes locked on hers, Sam had thoughtlessly lunged to his feet toward her, ripping vicious snarls from Jacob's lupine snout. Bella had ended up soothing both men by _asking _for Sam's help in getting down (she actually really did need it).

But poor Sam. Through this whole meeting his struggle had deepened the somber lines of his face while his heated frantic eyes volleyed between her and the imprints on the porch.

Come to think of it, a Pack dinner _was _actually a tactical plan, and a good one at that. It was obvious to Bella that they all craved (and their humanity desperately _needed_) just what she also had longed for all her life: a sense of place and acceptance and love.

A home.

And what better way to jump-start providing that than over a home-cooked meal? (Plus food was her own brand of magic and it worked miracles on males of any kind.)

But all of this faded into irrelevance as her foot took that first stair. Bella's eyes darted up to the porch, making a quick and covert sweep before they returned to the next step.

Seated at one end of the Council, her father's mustache crouched over tense lips set in a face that had incrementally grown redder and redder over this last hour. Now, that telltale vein was popping out in his forehead.

And she wondered what he saw: a naive child timidly climbing the stairs in her favorite ripped jeans shorts and bare feet? (she'd lost the flip-flops on the ride over) A girl with wolf-riding wind-whipped curls falling wildly over her shoulders who'd had her innocence stolen by the supernatural? A teen who was rebelling with recklessness that was going to ruin her life?

Or did he see the brave, courageously loving, savvy and strong woman she was trying to become?

The woman she _was becoming_.

The woman she already was.

Suddenly she knew it didn't matter: not how her father saw her... how _any _of them saw her.

Because Bella _was _becoming.

In her own way.

In her own life.

With her best friend.

**Hers**.

As was showcased in the rituals before her, at the top of the steps, without hesitation or so much as a nervous glance at the council in front of her or father down the line, Bella gracefully folded to her knees at the feet of her mate's father.

And she bowed her head.

Silence swallowed her whole down it's slick hollow throat and Bella's eyes fluttered closed. And she waited.

Finally she heard Billy's chair squeak and his soft draw of breath. "Isabella Marie Swan, our Alpha claims you as imprint." None of the warm familiarity was left in that deliberate and commanding voice - he could have been a stranger.

"Chosen by the Spirit to stand at his side for the rest of your days," he paused and she heard him lick his lips. "To honor his needs, respect his wishes and bear his seed to birth the future of our Tribe."

A shudder went down her spine as the words fell over her head like a downpour that started a flash flood of emotion.

_This _is what she was choosing - she knew this - though of course she hadn't gone down the road far enough to even _think _about their children (well she _had_, but she'd never admit it), much less understand what they meant to his tribe.

But to have someone else say it so plainly, so _formally_ out to the world (and her _father_)? It was shocking and frightening and overwhelming and validating and confusing and exciting and intense and _right_...

and just threatened to make her heart explode in every direction!

As if he'd known this, Billy had let that statement hang in the air, where it seemed to echo off into withering day. Bella's breath softly hitched and she bit her lip, trying to tame the welling tsunami within her.

"And you have accepted?"

The words sparked a feeling of rising panic.

"You have accepted the imprint of Tribal Alpha and future Chief Jacob Ephraim Black?"

But Jacob's name was like a lighthouse in the murky confusion of words that magically brought her back the safe harbor of her soul...and suddenly she realized _why_ she was so unnerved.

She was _still _letting what _others _thought get in the way. It didn't matter how Billy, his tribe, her father... _anyone _saw this. She had chosen to do life with _Jacob _. Her best friend, who knew her better than anyone, who'd always stood beside her with a huge heart, strong shoulders and warm arms, and who she loved with everything she had. She'd _known _things were complicated and treacherous and crazy-making, but Jake n' Bells would figure this freaking thing out! Together.

Bella was all in.

She took a resetting breath and pulled her shoulders back.

"Yes, I have," she said clearly.

"This was _your choice_?"

Even though they were probably just ceremonial words, their inference ignited righteous indignation in Jacob's defense.

"Of course!" she snapped, starting to look up with a disapproving scowl.

That is, before her damn temper receded enough for her to realize _where the hell she was_. _Oh, crap._

A blush charged to her cheeks as she contritely tucked her head.

"Yes," she answered quietly.

Billy paused for a moment and Bella swallowed thickly wondering if he was frowning at her outburst. _Why did she always have to screw things up with that stupid over-protect-... _

"You and the Alpha are now mated?"

_Oh my God! _

Bella squeezed her eyes closed in utter mortification while her cheeks veritably burned off her face. Her _father _was sitting not 15 feet away, along with half the freaking population of La Push!

But all in meant _all _in, didn't it? And that meant she had to deal with shapeshifters, supernatural wolves, psycho vampires... and apparently announcing to the Pack, the Council, _her _father _and his _that they'd had sex.

_Crap._

Bella huffed a resigned breath through her nose. She wanted to mumble it, but she didn't just on principle alone.

"**Yes**."

Someone shifted abruptly in their chair with a squeak and scuff against the floor. Someone in just about the same spot as _her father_.

Bella squeezed her eyes tighter.

And then jumped when Billy's hand settled over the crown of her head. It was heavy and warm and felt almost tender and, even if was just her imagination, it was just enough comfort to keep her from losing her mind.

"Then it is complete," he announced, in a voice like the fall of a hammer.

"None may dispute this most sacred of bindings," Billy continued, letting the words fall from his lips in a slow and mesmerizing baritone. "Imprinting is a rare gift and our history knows of only one Alpha before this one who was so blessed. It is a powerful omen for our people."

Bella's eyes popped open. She hadn't known that - she wondered if Jacob had. Her brow furrowed as she kept thoughtful eyes trained on Billy's shoes on the footrest of his chair.

"Any who interfere in this union," his voice raised as he enunciated each word crisply, deliberately. "Will no longer be welcomed on these lands."

Bella blinked in surprise. The edict was delivered dispassionately, but the message was certainly clear. And suddenly she understood what Billy was doing: he was boldly addressing any issues anyone had - of the Old Quil variety as well as her dad's - with a hard clear line.

And unequivocally taking their side.

"The Quileute Nation now recognizes Isabella Marie Swan as Alpha's mate... as Pack..." his hand bobbed on her head emphasizing each pronouncement. "As Tribe."

His words saturated the lawn like the lengthening afternoon shadows while his hand stayed firmly on her head.

And then silence.

Over a minute of silence.

As if he were _daring _anyone to rebut.

She wished she could see Billy's eyes. But she could imagine well enough an imperious sweep of hematite that that made men intuitively bow their heads - she'd already seen it perfected by his son. The two them really weren't so different after all.

Billy's hand then softened at her crown and his voice began rippling over her in the fluid lilt of formal Quileute that pulsed with a deep dusky rhythm.

This part was more familiar (she had seen him do similar with both Leah and Seth) so she wasn't surprised when his calloused hands slipped down to cup her jaw and firmly tilt her head up as he leaned in close. His breath fluttered over her face - he smelled sweet and musky and familiar. Bella instinctively inhaled and then exhaled, sharing breath with him, before he sat back.

Still holding her head firmly in his palms he leaned down to her left ear, continuing that hypnotic chant. Bella closed her eyes and relaxed into his grip with the flooding relief at having gotten through it without throwing up or falling on her face (well there was still the walk back down the stairs, she wasn't home free yet).

Billy turned her head to the other side and continued his singsong croon in her other ear and Bella just let the soothing words seep into her soul. She wished she understood. Someday she would.

Then finally he turned her head back to him and tipped her face up. She felt his warm moist lips press to her forehead.

"Daughter," he dragged the word out in a whisper over her skin. And the bottom dropped out of her heart.

Then cool air wafted between them as he sat back and Bella's eyes fluttered open with a sentimental smile.

"You did real good, hon-"

The words froze on his tongue as he slipped into an expression she'd never seen on that unflappable face. Bella blinked rapidly as his eyes rounded in undisguised shock. His gaze darted from one eye to other, over and over.

And suddenly she remembered.

She lowered her gaze as a blush gleefully jumped at the chance at more humiliation.

"_Quil_," Billy's voice rasped.

And her eyes bobbed back up to his face.

Billy's expression had contracted into intense concern, like she was lying in front of him bleeding out or something. "Jake!" he barked, all ceremonial pretense instantly dropped.

His voice eerily switched back to a palliative croon."When did this happen, honey?"

"Get her a chair," he abruptly snapped over his shoulder - like he was schizophrenic - as he gently pulled her up off her knees.

Her father had lunged to his feet and was brusquely pushing past curious Council members leaning forward in their chairs. Old Quil was stiffly making his way from the other side of the line.

Everything seemed to be happening at once!

Two chairs appeared with the scrape of wood and anonymous hands, and then she was being urged into one at the head of the stairs facing Billy's wheelchair.

Bella's head was spinning. With the stress and adrenaline of this meeting - hell, this whole freaking week - her brain felt like mush.

But suddenly she registered the uproar _behind _her of grating growls and she whipped over her shoulder to see all Pack on their feet, congealed into formation as they seemed to innately do. Every single one of those heated eyes was locked on _her_.

Except Jacob's. His back to her, had his hands planted firmly against a vibrating Sam Uley's chest who looked seconds from losing it (again).

"Emily!" Jacob barked.

Paul, who had positioned himself closest to the stairs was staring straight at her with a furrowed brow. With a sound blink, his eyes swept the porch, baring his teeth as he took a menacing step forward. He was yanked back by Leah's fist. With a vicious snarl, Paul spun on her and-...

Her head was forced back around by a firm hand on her chin.

Her widened eyes landed straight into the anxious worry etching her father's face.

"Oh my God," he breathed.

His calloused hand held her chin while his gaze paced between her eyes with increasing alarm.

_Okay, __now __Bella was starting to freak. _

Old Quil sat down in an empty chair beside Billy and his wrinkled face folded into an expression that could only be described as a cross between awe and horror.

"William!" he choked motioning toward Billy with a wrinkled hand. _Who the heck called Billy, __William__?_

"William, I need to see!" _Old Quil apparently._

"Charlie can you let Quil have a look," Billy's voice slipped in with counterfeit velvet calm aimed at her father. LIke his anxiety was a sump pump, that beet red rage had been drained to ashen in a few seconds flat.

Billy's warm hand dislodged her father's and gently urged her chin around.

Old Quil's eyes widened as he gasped some Quileute word - exclamation or curse, she couldn't tell.

"_See_ you old fool," Billy spat disparagingly. "So damn hung up on your history and the color of her skin that you shame us all."'

Bella's eyes were darting from face to face to face.

" 'You thinkin' his spirit's returned?" Billy murmured turning back to her with a furrowed brow.

_So many hands and eyes! _

Council members peering curiously behind her father, Billy and Old Quil, staring at her like she was some kind of mutant. Her father's fright, Old Quil's shock, Billy's intensity...

Anxiety was starting to strangle her!

"Did he mark her too?" Old Quil leaned in and Bella backed up correspondingly as his withered hand reached out-...

The lightning fist that snapped around his forearm made everything around her freeze.

"You _ever _touch her and I'll fucking kill you," Jacob's words were no more than a hiss of hate pushed through bared teeth.

He was standing on the grass at the side of the stairs with his long muscled arm extended to where the chairs and commotion were gathered at the head of them. He stared Old Quil down with incandescent eyes.

Bella drew in her first full deep breath since she'd climbed these stairs.

_Jacob. He was here. _It was a soft visceral voice of relief that settled in her bones like a sigh.

Without hesitation or concern - for anything really - Bella reached out to that quivering rock-hard forearm. The touch instantly sedated the the butterflies (or bats) in her stomach as well as the live-wire muscles slithering under that glistening skin. It was slicked with sweat.

'_Jake, they're freaking me out.' _she reached out to him with her mind._ 'Do you know what's wrong?'_

His head snapped around, his eyes instantly focused in hers. They weren't completely human, but it didn't surprise her. She could _feel _the wildness of his other form trying to pull him under.

He just felt so _protective..._he was _craving _violence right now in the worst kind of way.

Again she let warm, caring images bubble up in her mind (where they so naturally wanted to be) of them together - in both forms. Her fingers skimmed lightly over the beads of perspiration on his skin.

Abruptly he released the old man's arm to catch her hand in his. His touch was gentle in contrast to the gruff movement... he was always so gentle.

As soon as he was released, Old Quil bolted from his seat.

Eyes locked on hers, Jacob ignored him. His hand slipped from hers and in the next instant his impossible lissome leap cleared the stair rail. His huge body fell to porch like whisper of silk. He stayed congealed in a crouch at her side his eyes watching hers while she fed him soft soothing memories.

"Jacob," Billy's voice was back to that felty baritone that he'd always used in the worst of times. "Can you let Quil see?"

Bella didn't think he'd be able to answer in human speech, but he did.

"_What_ does he need to see." He bit out the words like they were broken glass as he turned menacingly on his father.

Billy's eyes subtly flicked up and he leaned back in his chair. Seeming to decide to switch gears, he leisurely folded his hands in his lap while his eyes paced thoughtfully between them.

"Are his the same, Bella?" he turned to her as if it were the most natural thing in the world to ask her about his son when he was no more than 2 feet away. "When they ain't all hell-blazin'?"

Bella glanced up at Jacob - he was now staring intensely at his father like he was either trying to understand or contemplating a punch - she couldn't be sure.

She turned back to Billy and nodded.

"And it happened after you accepted the imprint?" he asked tactfully, trying to spare her the humiliation this time she supposed. _It was waaaay too late for that._

Her eyes darted nervously to her father and saw that color in his face flooding right on back like a red tide. He wasn't stupid, he knew _exactly _what Billy was asking.

She _finally _allowed herself to pull her lip into her mouth while heat rushed to her cheeks, clearly answering the question.

"What the _fuck _is goin' on?!" Charlie demanded abruptly, as he burst to his feet.

Bella tucked her head at his rare curse (well they _used _to be rare). She didn't want to look - he sounded like he was going to blow any second.

"We're tryin' to figure that out, Charl-"

Billy's words were interrupted by a low scurrying growl and she looked up to find Jacob's eyes locked like rifle sights on her father.

Bella whipped around to find Charlie, in turn, fearlessly staring him down with incensed paternal outrage. His hands curled at his side.

_Oh, no... this could be bad._

"Dad," she whispered urgently, reaching out to his flannel covered arm. Without a glance, he wrenched it from her fingertips while his eyes narrowed like daggers at Jacob and his lips buckled under his mustache.

Jacob's growl started gaining momentum.

"_Daddy!"_ She hadn't called him that since she was a little girl.

Charlie's face jerked around, complex emotions flickering over it - heated fury, agonized worry, fear and regret.

"_Please_, daddy."

Her eyes backed the single word up with a desperate plea for faith.

And while she watched, her father's face slowly furrowed like a time-lapsed sunset, his shadowing eyes taking on a sheen of sadness . Then, without a word, he turned abruptly on his heel. One hand brusquely rubbed over his face while the other veritably shoved people out of the way on his way to the door.

It slammed behind him like a gunshot.

In the ensuing silence, she stared worriedly after him until a warm hand threaded with hers. It ignited a comforting hum that siphoned up her arm and shimmied down her body.

Bella turned slowly to find Jacob's eyes darting over her face with an expression she now recognized as being torn between the competing impulses of his two forms. But they were cooling, the raging incandescent heat dimming to golden filaments threading that new copper.

"They _are _the same," Old Quil's gravelly voice had Jacob whipping around with bared teeth. The old man's eyes slid instantly to the floor, pulling his head with them.

Bella blinked in confusion. _Something wasn't right. _ Jacob had scared the crap out of him but he didn't look _fearful _he looked... reverent?

"Bella honey," Billy's low soothing voice pulled her attention to intense eyes. She blinked under the weight of them. He licked his lips and his hand reached out. "May I see your neck-.."

Without tearing his eyes from Old Quil, Jacob's fist blithely intercepted his father's wrist. His face turned slowly after with eyes that were stone cold.

"_What_ is going on?" he spat the words in a burning hiss as he unfolded slowly to his feet.

"I'm sorry, son," Billy began in a consoling croon. "We're just surprised-.."

"I'm _not _your son right now," the edict percolated like heated tar as Jacob threw Billy's arm free and pointedly drew himself up to his towering height.

Bella couldn't stand it any more. She stood to her feet pushing the chair out of the way in the cramped space. She glanced behind her to find all the Pack gathered at the foot of the stairs, except Sam whose arms were wrapped possessively around Emily a safe distance away. Eerily synchronized, every gaze - even _Leah's _-snapped to hers... _expectantly_.

Unnerved, Bella offered them small reassuring smile and turned back around to the standoff. The rest of the Council had all backed away from father and son, locked in a silent war.

Bella instinctively knew not to interfere, so she reached out with her mind. _'Jake, do you know what's going on?' _

Jacob shook his head imperceptibly.

As if that minuscule movement broke some spell, Billy's eyes darted from Jacob to her. " Bella, there's this _real _important old story that tells of sharing eyes and-..."

"We don't give a fuck about your stories," Jacob laughed humorlessly, it was an ugly sound. "Fourteen year olds? Bloodlines? Imprinting? _Nothing's _been right. We're finding our own way."

Billy drew in a deep breath and released it slowly as he arranged himself in his chair, obviously forcing himself back into his habitual nonchalance.

"I can see why you feel that way, Jacob," Billy nodded slowly. "Things change, but the old ways still have things to tell us. A wise man listens to every voice before he decides."

Jacob clenched his jaw, the muscle bulging for a second.

'_Whattaya think, Bells?'_ she was surprised when his voice flickered through her mind like a whisper.

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth with a glance over her shoulder. Every Pack eye disconcertingly snapped to the movement with a visible tension like they were poised in the starting blocks of a sprint.

She turned back around. _'I think it's too much right now. The Pack needs you and we're writing our own story anyway, right? Jake n' Bells?' _

She felt his soft contented hum of agreement in her mind, but not so much as a single muscle twitched in that stony face.

"You need to leave," the decree fell from his lips in a deep imperious bass that offered no room for debate.

"We've got a war on our hands and I've got a Pack that's already been through fucking hell," his gaze swept the porch deliberately and every last pair of eyes dipped under its weight. "We have a new brother and sister to welcome and we _all _have a good man's life to honor." His gaze stopped in his father's eyes. "If old stories have waited this long," his mouth hitched up in a dark smirk. "They can wait around a little longer."

Bella was impressed - even though he drew a hard cocky line in the sand, he still managed to covertly soften it with acknowledged respect for Harry, and indirectly the Council, while not discounting their stories all together.

Billy tipped his head, considering the man before him with a slow private smile. "I can respect that, Alpha," he agreed. He held his son's gaze a little longer and then turned over his shoulder.

"The Council will adjourn to the Clearwaters," his voice boomed over the porch and, without a word, members began gathering themselves and filing through the door. Turning back around his gaze swept from Jacob down to her.

"You did good, Bella. Real good," he murmured, his eyes intense. "I know that was real uncomfortable, but I had to use the old ways so there'd be no room for their fool questions."

Bella's eyes wandered to the floor uneasily as a residual blush heated her cheeks. She looked back up with a little nod.

"I didn't mean to cause trouble," he gave her one of his old smiles. "I'm real grateful, honey."

Bella was still feeling understandably pretty raw. And protective. "I didn't do it for _you_," she spat quietly.

Billy's smile broadened, completely unperturbed. With a silent nod he looked back up at his son and tipped his chin in acknowledgement before he turned his chair around and wheeled toward the door. Joe Whitehorse was holding it open as the last Council member shuffled through.

Jacob turned his back on the old men and met Bella's gaze with unreadable eyes. Without a word, he stepped in, slipping one hand around to grasp the back of her head while he leaned down. He pressed his lips lips to her hairline for an entire breath with a heat that simmered with passion. Bella's eyes fluttered closed in bliss.

_Just his touch... _

'_I love you so fucking much.'_ His whisper in her mind was borne on a deluge of human ardor palpably boiling with the searing possessiveness of his other form.

And it was the first time he'd really allowed her to see _both _sides of him. After spending (too little) time with the wolf, she had a much better understanding of the battle he was waging - that he'd always be waging - between a leader's dominion, an animal's instinct and a warm human heart. It wasn't that he was fighting it any more, it's just that all that strength, passion, rage and power had to be carefully controlled in a fragile human world.

And she was deeply moved that he was starting to let her in like this. She didn't _want _just one part of him, she wanted _everything _- even if it was hard and confusing and frightening sometimes.

She loved him; they'd figure it out together.

"We will," he breathed against her skin and then pulled back. For a fleeting moment his eyes were soft and open clear down to his soul, as a ghost of a smile subtly softened his face.

Then, straightening, his fingers came up to rest tenderly under her chin while in contrast that steel shudder visibly slammed back down like a fortress gate.

He turned from her without another word. But Bella understood; he had a job to do.

They both did actually - she just wasn't quite sure what hers was yet. He'd said just to be herself and she couldn't go wrong (with a kiss on the nose). Since Bella trusted _him_, she thought she'd give it a try.

"Kim, Claire," Jacob called, reaching out a hand to the girls standing uncertainly at the far end of the porch. "C'mere, chicas."

_Fuck it was so hard to turn away from her._

He just wanted to scoop her up and run away from Councils and fathers and a needy strung out Pack. To find a spot in the forest where he could press her down into the sweet fragrant earth and bury danger and duty in the slick creamy heat of her body and lap honeyed sighs from her lips.

Jacob grounded his frustration in the clean fragrant scent of imprints as he pulled Kim to his chest and drew a long breath through his nose. It wasn't even in the same _universe _as Bella's, but the scents of all the imprints subtly calmed the wolves. They smelled fresh and sweet... kind of like babies.

With a smacking kiss on the top of her head, he murmured, "go to him." And then released the girl whose feet were already moving toward her mate. But amazingly they stopped at Bella for a quick but sincere embrace.

Jacob turned back to stroke his hand lightly down Claire's back - just enough touch to reconnect. Claire didn't really touch anyone but Quil … and Jacob, but only because it had been hardwired into her brain by the imprint. It was a compulsion for her - for all of them - because the Alpha _needed _to connect with each of his Pack. But he was always respectful and careful with little Claire - he knew how her life had been before.

"He's on his way Claire," he smiled into the girl's saucer eyes. "You did good, little one." Jacob leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to the top of her hair. "C'mon," he jerked his chin toward the lawn and the girl shot him a hesitant smile before she started toward the stairs.

Jacob had "pushed" the wolves to make sure the imprints were sequestered and not sitting beside their mates as usual. He'd known this meeting was going to be a fucking mess.

Jacob's gaze swept the lawn as he heard the last of the Council's cars start in the front of the house. He'd had this meeting here - on _their _territory - for a reason. The comfort and familiarity of the closest thing they had to a home was the only thing that had allowed his Pack to stay in their skins - even with Jacob's invisible reins.

Especially since his attention had been divided.

Divided? That was a fucking joke. He'd been drawn and quartered, cleaved in half. He hadn't been prepared for how hard it would be to have Bella in the middle of this mess.

He felt so incredibly fucking protective of her.

Even if she had totally _rocked_. And rocked it hard.

He spun on his heel with the barest hint of a smile on his lips - never show weakness and that meant emotion. But he couldn't help the catch of surprise in his breath.

Claire had both arms wrapped around Bella and was squeezing her with abandon, her cheek resting on her shoulder. Bella's hands stroked soothingly over the girls back but her eyes darted cannily up to meet Jacob's. She gave him a small smile.

'_How the hell did you do __that__?'_

One of Bella's shoulders lifted with the side of her mouth - a mouth he very much wanted to kiss right about now.

His eyes intensified with that thought as he clasped his hands behind his back and strolled toward the two girls. Bella's lips curved in a sexy little smile that was _made _of temptation. But it was also full of promises and that's the only thing that kept him sane.

Quil, Collin and Brady had phased back about half a mile away and were almost here, he could _feel _them. His eyes snapped up to the woods. Several seconds later, the Pack all turned as one unit to the first audible sound.

"He's here, Claire," Jacob murmured as he neared Bella's side. Claire's head whipped around just as Quil burst into the yard, slowing to a jog.

"Quil!" she shrieked and with a final glance at Bella, disengaged herself and ran down the stairs leaping with abandon at the bottom, only to get caught in Quil's lightning reflexes. He spun her around with that boyish exuberance he'd somehow had managed to keep through this hell.

He always tried to spare Quil from seeing his grandfather be an asshole, or, in this case, almost get his throat ripped out. He'd see it in the Pack mind later, sure enough, but in his simplistic and very Quilish way he'd always shrug and say "he'll die eventually."

Despite how he came off, Quil wasn't an idiot, he was a guy who'd lost a lot (like his dad then his mom) and had decided just to let everything go. Except Claire. It was good for him to finally have something (someone) to hold on to. There was no question of "who's side" in this thing but Jacob still did his best to make sure he never had to take one. He didn't need to lose his grandfather too by having to step across that line.

Jacob's hand slipped to the small of Bella's back and he watched her shoulders visibly relax with a soft sigh. He had been letting the Pack settle and now they were going through their greeting ritual (which he didn't think they even realized) as they bumped fists and clasped shoulders with the newly arrived wolves. It was subdued, but slowly they were loosening up.

Turning his head he leaned down and pressed his lips to her hair, drawing in a breath of the scent of pure ecstasy as his eyes fluttered in relish.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

Bella looked up, blinking at him with a confused pucker between her brow.

It was all he could say, but he'd wanted to say it: two words that encompassed many, many things. For this crazy life she was now stuck in, for going berserk and nearly ripping out an old man's throat. For barely keeping it together when she'd walked _away from him_ toward the Council - he knew his lupine anxiety had just made things worse. For having to do what she hated and perform under 25 sets of eyes. And for that stupid fucking ceremony. Jacob couldn't _believe _his father had used the old words - though he understood why.

But the thing was, there were going to be many, many things he was sorry for in this life he'd been dealt. And if they were doing it together he was going to have to trust that she could stand at his side.

"I can handle it," Bella whispered, her eyes darting between his as he blinked back into the moment.

She'd read him again. "I'm getting sloppy," he sniffed

"Just the way I like it," she mouthed silently around an impish little smile.

_Holy fucking shit, he wanted her._

Jacob closed his eyes soundly for a moment as he forced his body into submission - unlike the imprinted wolves in the yard who were trying to swallow their mates whole, such public displays weren't becoming for their Alpha. And just how the hell was he going to stand it when he wanted her so fucking bad?

He opened his eyes to her worried frown - she didn't understand the subtle pain that tightened his stoic expression.

Some things she was going to have to figure out on her own, though he doubted she'd ever truly understand: just how much he needed her, wanted her, craved her. It was a deep dark secret locked away in the marrow of each of his forms. Wordlessly he pressed his lips to her hair again and drew in a resetting breath before he straightened.

With a little rub over her sholderblades, he looked out over the yard. The Pack was settling and tossing covert glances their way.

"Let's go," he whispered, and he guided her toward the stairs.

His hand at the small of her back with a-not-so-subtle possessiveness, they descended the stairs. But Bella - of course - stumbled toward the bottom and Jacob caught her without thinking about it. Wrapping his hands around that small waist, he swung her out over the grass as he leaped the last steps in one. It was perfect really because she was nervous - he could scent it - and the playful little swoop dislodged delicious gum drop giggles and gave her just a moment to reset from one shitty fucked-up meeting to one he eventually hoped would feel like home.

If anyone could do it, it was Bella. She was a natural at making people feel comfortable and heard.

He set her little bare feet in the grass and she smiled happily up at him with sparkling copper eyes. Jacob's balls lit on fire.

But all too soon, she remembered all too well where she was. Blinking, she tucked her chin and pulled her lip into her mouth and Jacob gave her what he hoped was a reassuring lift of his brow.

Her eyes darted nervously out to the stone-still, deathly-silent Pack. All eyes were locked on her like she alone had the power to offer them redemption or grind their souls to ash.

But Jacob could _see _it fall over her like a silken shift settling her shoulders and lifting her chin - that brave stubborn courage that came from how well she loved.

"Missed you guys," she whispered.

It was like a starting gun: Embry was both the closest and the first one to sweep her up in his arms. While the others quickly fell in with with a burst of knuckle bumps and high-fives.

Jacob deftly greeted his wolves as he kept a covert eye on his mate.

Embry drew in a deep breath at her crown. "Sister," he exhaled as he finally released her and set her feet back on the ground.

"Do I smell different?" Bella looked up at him with a heartbreakingly guileless smile.

Embry's eyes darted up to Jacob's with silent amusement before he pinched her chin and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "You smell like Pack now." He gave her one of his gentle smiles and graciously only half of the truth.

Because more than Pack, she smelled like _**Mine**_.

A lupine rumble percolated in his chest as he wrapped an arm around Emily and then clapped shoulders with Sam who had half an eye on Bella himself. Predictably he was the next to usurp her in a his brawny arms and a hug that leached stress and desperation. It would take him a little while to come back to them fully.

"He's doin' good, Em," Jacob whispered, brushing her hair back from her damaged cheek.

Surprisingly she gave him a gorgeous smile that would make anyone forget that it was lopsided. "I can't believe he didn't phase," she breathed.

Jacob wiggled his brows and she chuckled. "I'm _so_ glad you're back, Jay."

"Me too, Em," he sighed, squeezing her swelling body carefully to his side.

"I'm even gladder you brought Bella," she grinned turning out of his arms. He sniffed a laugh... so _that's _how it was going to be?

_He loved it._

In mere minutes the stress that had been simmering under the skin of every last one of them had transformed into cautious exuberance and tentative laughter.

Jacob allowed his heart to be lifted as he bumped shoulders and mussed hair with each one of his wolves and watched Bella hold court in her own way.

She had this awesome ability to connect with each of them - from Sam's unstable neediness, to Seth's boyish excitement shadowed by grief. From Quil's rambunctious humor to Jared's lame attempt at cool. She hugged and laughed and rolled her eyes. She was genuine and real and she cared.

They could feel it.

Except when they didn't want to.

Jacob looked up at the feel of eyes on him and saw Leah sulking at the foot of the porch stairs. He met her narrowed gaze and she just silently glared... defiant and confused, but furtively not wanting to be.

He'd been watching (when was he not?), and, whether she liked it or not, the Pack could use what she brought to the table and Jacob was a cut-throat mercenary when it came to this shit. But she needed a little more breaking down before she was malleable enough to grow.

Jacob smacked his lips blandly with a little cock of his head - as if preparing for the long haul (because he was) - and just stared right on back. This was a game she had not a snowflake's chance in _hell _of winning. The dominant in him was incensed at the insubordination and wanted to slap her down, but the man knew to wait for the right time.

Now, certainly wasn't one of them because only a few seconds in, Leah realized the futility (smart girl) and her gaze fell like lead as she collapsed on the bottom stair. He watched her a little longer - the grief and confusion and pain.

His head turned back around at a particular scent that always made his shoulders square and blood pressure soar. Testy, testosterone, and one Paul Lahote. He - like no other in the Pack - alternately imploded or exploded magnificently without a tight collar on the beast. But knowing his history Jacob certainly understood why.

Paul held up his fist for a bump. "That little bitch ain't nothin' but trouble," he smirked conspiratorially jerking his chin toward Leah. With that aggressive competitiveness, the little fucker was testing where she fit in the Pack... and (like always) every last one of Jacob's nerves.

Jacob gave him a saccharine smile (when he really craved a fist to his face) and clapped a hand on his shoulder so heavily that he staggered. Paul's eyes widened and snapped back to his. Jacob exaggerated a sigh and clapped the other hand on his shoulder with the same undisguised strength as he let the power of dominion ripple over him with his displeasure.

He leaned down to Paul's ear. "How many times do I have to tell you?" he whispered with a theatrical singsong patience. "Pack's Pack. Jared _and _Leah are Pack."

Fear had sharpened Paul's scent over a heart rate that that sounded like a jackhammer - Jacob didn't know why the man did this to himself. (No, of course he did - the poor guy was the most self-destructive thing he'd ever seen.)

When Paul didn't answer, Jacob pulled back, leaning down to face him - nose to nose- mere inches away. He raised his brow as if waiting for the answer.

Paul's eyes dropped to the ground, and he staggered back half a step as his knees buckled under Jacob's grip.

Tempering his strength, he clapped one hand to the side of Paul's neck as he leaned his forehead against his temple. "If you ever _hit _him again, if I ever _hear _that again," he breathed deceptively quiet and soft. "I'm gonna just cut off those balls."

He heard Paul's squirting swallow.

Straightening, Jacob painted on a counterfeit smile as his hands slipped from Paul's shoulders. "Try this again?" He held out his fist.

Paul bumped his own fist against it half-heartedly as his eyes cut out to his comrades on the lawn. Every last one of them had turned their attention to the alluring sight of their infamous loose cannon being reined in (again) by their Alpha. At Jacob's stern sweep, they quickly picked up right where they'd left off like nothing had happened.

He ended in Bella's gaze, where she'd been safely tucked under Embry's arm just in case things exploded. He'd shown her a couple of Paul's memories - not the bad ones - just so she could understand.

With another glance at Jacob, Paul made a pitiful attempt at picking up his balls off the floor as he squared his shoulders and sauntered the few steps toward Jacob's mate. Like all of them, it was a compulsion to reconnect - he didn't know how Leah stood it.

Speaking of whom, Jacob glanced over to see her slumped on the stairs with her head in her hands. Obviously not well.

His attention snapped back to Bella who was slipping free of Embry's arm.

"Swan," Paul smirked, holding out a fist.

She tipped her head with that adorable little pucker between her brow, and then threw her arms around him in an exuberant embrace. Paul froze with the funniest fucking expression Jacob had ever seen (he wished he'd had a camera). Then with a nervous glance up to his Alpha - slowly, uncertainly, tentatively - his arms encircled her little body.

And _that's exactly _why Jacob had shown her what he had - it was probably the first real hug the man had gotten in his life.

Seeing Paul being hugged by anyone, but especially by a girl half his size was infinitely more fascinating than even seeing his ass get chewed off by his Alpha so, of course, everyone stopped what they were doing to watch. With a silent frown, Jacob waved them all back to as normal as any of them were right now. Paul deserved this moment.

Bella pulled back and looked up at him with one of her open, candid smiles and Paul's hands slipped from around her back to awkwardly pat her shoulders (it was _painfully _awkward).

"How's things, Lahote?" Bella affably ignored it as she rubbed her hands on her hips.

"I guess I was right," he quickly painted on a cheap veneer of suave. "Everything's better now that you an' Jake-"

Bella's fingers quickly snapped up to his lips. "Just... " she shook her head as a little grin grew roots. "Just _don't talk_."

A smirk bloomed under her fingertips and with a theatrical wrinkle of her nose, Bella wiped them on her jeans shorts .

That smirk became sly. "Y'know I can show-..."

"Ah!" Bella interrupted with a warning look and staying palm.

Jacob's low growl backed it up as he stepped to his mate's side.

But even with that trainwreck of a mouth, now there wasn't the slightest scent of sexual reaction from Paul. Claimed mates carried a scent like Pack (under that imprint sweetness) so they were siblings, end of story. It was probably the smartest fucking part about this whole curse: if any one of them had showed the slightest hint of sexual interest in her he'd have ripped them to pieces without a second thought.

Paul's eyes darted up to his Alpha's, and his lips stretched out into a cocky smile that was at odds with the emotion tumbling in his eyes. With a deferential nod (that actually _almost _looked sincere) he turned back to the group to find another victim to take out his confusion.

Jacob's hand rubbed down Bella's back as she naturally leaned into his side and he met Embry's sparkling eyes. Subtly sharing his smile, Jacob reached over her and they clasped hands.

"You doin' okay?" Jake asked.

Embry nodded with a thoughtful purse of his lips as his eyes darted down to Bella then back up to his. "Better," he finally pronounced in a fleecy baritone.

Jacob could live with that.

_Better_ was infinitely better than where they'd been.

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_Review if you like._


	19. Something to Lose

_**Note: **__At the end of this chapter is a retelling of the (fake) Quileute myth mentioned here. I think it's more effective if you read it after. And thanks to reader Azurena for setting me straight with the Twi mythology back in Chap 8. It worked perfectly with what I'd planned. :-)_

_Thanks Tayjayfan for chatting with me when I'm insufferable. _

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_As always, thanks for reading and hope you enjoy._

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**19 - Something to Lose**

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Jacob was watching something miraculous.

"And don't forget the beer..."

His mate rolled her eyes with a little sniff. "I think I got that the first hundred times you said it, Paul."

"Emily says she's got enough vegetable oil and flour!" Kim called, pushing open the screen with an easy smile in spite of the fact he'd sent Jared on patrol with the Clearwater siblings. Usually the girls seemed uncomfortable when their mates were away.

Bella looked over her shoulder with a bright smile as Kim came across the porch. Collin and Brady wordlessly parted so she could sit down between them on the top stair.

No doubt about it, it was definitely miraculous. It wasn't a flashy, spectacular or jaw-dropping miracle, it was quiet, subtle and soulful and, in Jacob's opinion, the very best kind. He'd seen more of the other variety to last a lifetime.

The corner of his mouth hitched as he continued scraping off the old charred crust from a barbeque grill that had been languishing for a year (or maybe longer) while Sam dumped out ash and cleaned up the rest of it. The man's eyes were finally human again and they darted up just at the right time to catch Jacob's almost-smile.

Sam let an uncharacteristic curve soften those solemn lips as he dutifully jerked his gaze back to his work.

But Jacob's inheritance mandated shucking the vulnerability of personal emotion from both his face and shoulders. "She's what the Pack needed," he bit out crisply, as he renewed his scaling of the grill in Sam's backyard.

Sam chuckled softly. "But if _I'd _have said it said it you'd have punched me in the face."

Jacob looked up with glittering eyes. "Probably several times."

Sam's smile became private and he tucked his head in lupine appeasement and went back to his task. In his moments of clarity, he had the emotional intelligence - and similar dominant impulses - to understand Jake better than most.

Jacob rolled his eyes at himself as his gaze snapped back to his mate like she was a magnet. There was no help for it - he'd be even more temperamental than usual until he'd ripped that psycho leech into confetti like he was furiously planning to do right this very moment.

Because he was worried. No matter how he spun it, he couldn't come up with the perfect and perfectly foolproof scenario: one that kept Bella a million miles out of harm's way.

But Jacob had always been able to appreciate beauty in life - or more accurately, it was a skill Bella was reminding him he still had. So for just a moment, he ignored Sam, and pulled himself out of the fiery pit of plot and plan and onto the shores of this beautiful thing happening before him.

This beautiful woman.

_His_.

She was sitting on the bottom step beside a lounging Embry, and leaning back against his broad shoulder. Out in the yard in front of them, Paul was sprawled out on his stomach and had been mischievously tickling her toes with a blade of grass in a very unexamined bid for more attention. Bella was enduring his harassment like a saint.

Stretched out across the next step up, Quil had his back to the railing and Claire was draped over his lap. She was absently playing his his big hand when she wasn't joining in with giggles or suggestions. Collin and Brady hemmed in Kim on the top stair, now playfully volleying her back and forth between their shoulders.

And they were all touching.

Jacob doubted they were even conscious of it, but like the wolf-pack they were, they were all connected by touch: shoulder to shoulder, toes absently draped over a shin, Embry's arm along Quil's leg, and Paul merely a blade of grass away from heeding his own instinct.

"So, chicken, steaks, bread crumbs, rolls -..." Bella began reading.

She was making her shopping list - Cody was _giving _them whatever they needed for their meal tonight (from Cody's general store, of course -the only grocery on the Rez) courtesy of a strange and suck-upy Council phone call. In fact, they were solicitously bringing over several fold up banquet tables right now from Sue's house so they could set up a Pack dinner. It was really weird (and Jacob had the distinct feeling it wasn't entirely due to his dad's new influence) but he'd have to figure out what new games the Council was playing later.

Because right now, his focus had shifted a million percent to this war they had ahead of them.

(Which he could easily do, because Bella was taking better care of his Pack than he ever could.)

"And beer," Paul interjected again, finally relenting to the impulse and pinching her pinky toe this time.

Bella squeaked and gave him a mock scowl. "And _beer_," she wrinkled her nose mockingly.

Paul pinched her big toe this time and Bella started kicking her feet in a playful tussle with his hands.

Embry helpfully whacked Paul upside the head with a long leg and shit eating grin (apparently also an acceptable form of lupine contact). But, of course, with a growl, Paul had to aggressively snatch for his foot. With supernatural reflexes, Embry deftly yanked it out of the way even as he pulled Bella protectively to his side and they started rambunctiously-...

"If you want that **beer,** Lahote," Bella reprimanded loudly as her feet reached out to catch one of his hands. Jacob hadn't even had the chance to growl before Bella was on it. Her touch was like some kind of switch and instantly their infamous instigator settled with a petulant huff.

"That's kinda hittin' below the belt, Swan," he complained.

"Well, that's where you keep your brain, right?" Bella gave him a saccharine smile.

A single appreciative laugh burst from his lips as he settled back down on his elbows to the tune of sniggers up and down the stairs.

Under different circumstances, Jacob might be surprised that Paul's big mouth had let her get away with that one without a comeback, but he'd seen the novel respect in the man's mind (plus Jacob was standing only an efficient leap away). Paul respecting a _woman_? Actually, he'd been wrong, there were some pretty fucking _spectacular _miracles going on.

Paul shot the wolf a few remnant glares, but Emry blithely ignored them as he rested his cheek sweetly on the top of Bella's head and looked down at the little pad of paper in her hand. "What kind of pie, Bella?" he asked.

"Custard!" Claire piped up.

"Sounds good," she looked over her shoulder with a warm smile for the girl. "Whattaya think, probably five? Do you guys want all one flavor or something else too?"

"My fave is cherry," Paul purred, punctuating his innuendo by pulling a finger from his cheek with a pop.

"Settle down there, Lollypop," Bella cut her eyes out blandly.

Claire's girlish giggles pealed down over the stairs, eliciting chuckles from the others and another foot-slap upside the head from Embry.

Paul just snickered wickedly happy to have all the attention again. They were still all so fucked up, but somehow Bella had a way of making them seem... _less _fucked up. Actually things felt strangely... normal.

"Okay, so _five custard_," Bella pressed meaningfully.

"How about corn?"Emily suggested, pushing out on the porch. "Joe Whitehorse brought some down to Cody's the other day."

Collin and Brady scooted down to make room for her as Sam dropped what he was doing to jog to the porch and facilely vaulted the railing to help his mate. Emily's eyes darted out to meet Jacob's with tender exasperation, but allowed her over-protective lover to pull her down into his lap at the head of the stairs.

As the conversation continued amiably on, Jacob watched his Pack unconsciously draw physically closer - an external metaphor for the bonds that were healing and forming within. Emily rebraided Kim's hair, Collin and Brady exchanged age-appropriate elbows, slaps and snickers, Claire leaned over Embry's head to read the shopping list putting a hand on Bella's arm. Even Paul collapsed his cheek on his forearm in the grass leaving a hand "accidentally" draped over Bella's foot, finally closing the lupine loop.

And there it was:

The first moment of actual contentment Jacob had ever seen and a glimpse into what their future could look like. He could even feel the strength of a coalescing Pack seeping out even through their bonds to his three absent wolves. Leah might take a little longer to work into the mix, but if even _Paul _was feeling it, she would too. His damage ran deep.

Bella's natural unassuming warmth and acceptance pulled them all together where his newly centered and whole self contained them with power. Suddenly he understood: his mate nurtured their humanity, while, as Alpha, he reined in the beast.

It was the first fledgling glimmer of balance.

And it was somehow deeply satisfying to all parts of him: his Pack and mate - his world - at peace.

Even if it was just a stolen moment in the middle of a war.

And a stolen moment that was now over: like it was choreographed, every last wolf turned toward the front of the house at the sound of Billy's pick-up truck rounding the bend almost a mile out. The girls - who were used to the Pack's supernatural senses by now - and didn't even look up.

But Bella's eyes snapped up to Jacob's - he could see the worry she'd been hiding so expertly from them prickling in her eyes like acid.

'_My dad's here with the tables,' _Jacob sent her soothingly through their bond.

'_Mine?'_

He was about to tell her no when the truck paused down the road with the indistinct murmur of conversation... and then continued on.

'_He's on his way back - about a mile out,'_ Jacob provided.

Charlie had gone for a walk - or that's what Jacob had guessed (his car hadn't started since he'd burst out of that Council meeting only an hour earlier). But he was glad the man had come back back in time for some informal strategy with Billy. The sky was starting to blush with dusk and that sickening countdown was ticking relentlessly away in the corner.

And as it played out now, Charlie was Jake's best secret weapon.

"Okay Emb, you're keeper of the list," Bella grinned - valiantly submerging that anxiety in her eyes as she stood up and handed off the pad of paper with a theatrical flourish.

"You're not coming?" Quil gawked.

"And get caught in _this _crossfire?" she laughed, motioning to the three of them.

Simply unable to wait any longer, Jacob finally abandoned the grill and was behind her in a second. With the softest sigh, she naturally melted against his side even before Jacob's possessive arm wrapped around her waist. Leaning over, he drew in a deep soothing breath of her scent - still flagrantly mixed with his own. _Fucking heaven._

"I'm sending Paul patrolling, so Cody's might just survive a Pack visit," Jacob murmured over her hair. His glittering eyes found the wolf in question where he was standing up and dusting himself off from the grass.

Jacob was loathe to admit it, but unfortunately he knew exactly how Sam felt. He didn't want to be that kind of smothering, over-protective lover, but even though it was his own fucking Pack - and there wasn't the slightest scent of sexual interest - there was still an unexamined niggling jealousy at seeing her so comfortable around other males. Especially ones as dominant as Paul.

Paul's lips quirked knowingly as he tucked his head to hide it, making it a little push of Jacob's envelope that was just subtle enough not to earn him a punch to the gut.

Jacob swallowed his growl, and kept his head in the game.

"Emb, Quil and Claire …can you guys pick out some good steaks?" It wasn't really a question, Jacob was just being polite but he wanted the older wolves out of earshot when he talked with his father and Charlie.

"And _Sam _I want you to patrol with Paul."

They were such innocent words on the surface, but at that moment in the Uley's back yard, a _human _could have heard a pin drop.

Jacob held his face carefully neutral (like always) as he watched Sam's thick swallow before the man brusquely nodded once in answer to his Alpha. Then, without a word, he helped his mate up and tenderly wrapped his arms around her growing middle. Emily glanced up at her lover and then met Jacob's eyes both with surprise and understanding... and worry.

It was clear to her that Jacob was making a point of pushing Sam past his comfort zone which meant the zone he kept around her. Sam wouldn't have even been able to hold down most jobs with his need to protect his mate, though luckily his landscaping gig could be scheduled with frequent trips back home to check on his imprint. _Any _kind of conflict made it nearly impossible for his wolf to be more than 5 minutes away from her.

But that was going to have to change. _Fast_.

Jacob was going to need everyone at their best - whatever that was (and he needed to know before they went into this battle).

And that meant Leah had to focus with Sam phased and in the mix. And Sam had to just be able to focus. Period.

Bella of course sensed the tension in him and she turned then in his arms with those striking eyes, intense and knowing.

"I'll go get things started in the kitchen while Collin and Brady set up in the living room?" she smiled at him, bringing the conversation fluently back to dinner plans. But between them she added, _'can I get a few minutes with my dad?'_

Jacob nodded imperceptibly as he pushed her hair behind an ear and his eyes darted over this face that he loved. This face he simply no fucking question about it _must_ keep safe.

But he blinked in surprise as Bella went up on her tiptoes, raising a petitioning brow. _'Love isn't weak, Jacob,' _her gossamer voice ripped through his mind.

A small smile quirked the corner of Jacob's lips - how the fuck could he resist that pleading mouth? It wasn't even _inhumanly _possible.

His hand molding to her jaw, he leaned down and Bella pressed her lips to his for an entire breath. It was a kiss of butter mints that was sweet and creamy and tender.

With a little hum, she went back down on her heels smiling up at him with eyes that sparkled with love and trust that made him want to take on the entire fucking world if it kept her safe.

His hand curved around to the nape of her neck and he pulled her in fiercely as he pressed his lips to her hairline. He released her and she didn't say word, but her palm lingered on her chest for just a second longer with a subtle reminder of the intimacy between them. And then she turned out of his embrace.

To another round of dead silence in the yard.

Outwardly undaunted by the various undisguised stares of his Pack (if wolves were anything, they were nosy - and extremely unsubtle about it), Bella bounced past Paul and Embry in her little bare feet in a way that made that pert ass wiggle temptingly.

Wrapping an arm around Claire's shoulders, she lead her and Kim up the stairs with some bullshit chatter about how to pick a good steak. Jacob tore his gaze from his mate and cast a warning stare around the yard that had eyes and fledgling smiles scurrying for cover.

But Bella had played it perfectly (it certainly didn't surprise him): she'd kissed him all feminine and tender and sweet, just enough to show _their _love without _his _vulnerability. It was just the balance he'd been looking for, because even an Alpha couldn't be expected to keep his hands and lips to himself _entirely _in front of his Pack.

Not when she had an ass like that.

His eyes darted back up to watch it sway - completely unaware of how sexy it was - under those wild mahogany curls as she strode to where Emily was holding open the screen with a smile. But his face showed nothing - this he knew - because when he glanced back down to Paul the man squared his jaw without an ounce amusement left in his eyes.

That sharp mind was already trying to peg the play.

"Sam?" Jacob motioned the older wolf down to the yard. "Emb and Quil, go help Collin and Brady."

Sam jogged down the stairs, his face stony and ready. (Jacob hoped he was ready).

One of them had _everything _to lose: Sam - his wife and child. The other had _nothing_: Paul, a motherfucking nutcase and the best fighter they had. Both would fight unequivocally and without the slightest hesitation.

To the death.

He clapped a hand on each man's brawny shoulder as he silently searched two sets of steely ebony eyes.

But beyond the strategy and tactic, he also trusted them. In different ways, through all they'd both gone through, they still each had good hearts (Paul's hadn't even been able to get beaten out of him).

"You know what this motherfucker's after," Jacob hissed low and deadly and slick. "But what you also gotta know is: he's got a goddamn mindreader on his side."

Both Paul and Sam both blinked in surprise. Right now details are on a strict need-to-know basis but if they didn't have _some _idea of what they were going into, they wouldn't be as malleable.

"We think that's why he's figured out so much so fast," Jacob spat. "I'm thinkin' he's got the mindreader near the borders of our lands and's been catching thoughts while we patrol. And he's gonna be watching tonight. Understand where I'm going?"

Both men nodded curtly, though Jacob wasn't sure that they did. But they were willing to do whatever he asked of them, that was the important part.

"I'm gonna put you both under the Order until you get back," Jacob crooned, watching Paul blanche imperceptibly. He turned to Sam. "But it won't work an imprint. Can you do it? Keep from thinking about Emily to keep her safe?"

Beyond the bob of Sam's adam's apple, beyond the twitch under his left eye, understanding ignited deep in those astute eyes. He understood that this was both test and training. He understood that this was an investment of his Alpha's faith. He understood what the stakes were for them all. (What he didn't know was that Edward would have little interest in Sam's mate - Jacob wouldn't risk Emily.)

"Yes I can," Sam bit the words out like raw hamburger meat with exactly the blood Jake had been hoping for.

He nodded, panning from one set of eyes to the other. Paul stared back with that cold unfathomable intensity that freaked everyone the hell out.

As Alpha, Jacob loved it.

"Can you help me keep my mate safe?" he whispered, slick like a serpent as he clapped his hand to Paul's neck.

"She's _my Pack_." Paul's hiss was like steel on stone as sparks ignited deep in his eyes. And it was then Jacob _knew_ he'd truly be a force to be reckoned with (and that he'd underestimated the depth of Bella's touch).

Because finally - for the first time in his life - Paul had something to lose.

'

Charlie looked like a man who'd lost it all as Bella pushed out on the front porch. Arms braced on the railing, head hanging, this palpable dispair was far worse than the anger she'd expected.

Only a few minutes ago, the shopping expedition had headed out to Cody's in Billy's truck while Jacob and his father met back in Emily's shed studio. Charlie had shuffled up only minutes later, hands stuffed deep in his pockets and shoulders slumped under what weighed them down.

But he'd come back instead of getting into his cruiser parked down the road and it had to count for something. Bella pulled the flannel shirt that Emily had lent her a little tighter against the cooling evening air as she walked tentatively to his side.

Bracing her hands against the railing, she stared out into the dusk. Her father had never been good with words, but problem was, Bella didn't know what to say either. Everything she'd tried to come up with to explain this last week sounded stupid... even in her own head.

So she started with the only thing she was sure of.

"I'm sorry, dad," she whispered, as her eyes caught an early firefly winking out from the woods across the scruffy front yard and held on for dear life.

She heard her father heave a heavy sigh from the twilight. And Bella waited.

After a few moments, she saw movement in her periphery as he raised his head. "I'm the one who's sorry, Bells," he murmured. "Real fuckin' sorry."

Bella's brow furrowed in concern as she turned toward him. Charlie was staring stoically out across the lawn. "You don't have-" she began.

"I shoulda protected you better," he interrupted brusquely. His voice sounded rough and battered.

She opened her mouth to contradict him again, but he turned to her with burning eyes. "I shoulda done more. Seen it comin' all this year. Told you to stay with your mom. Kept you safe from all this shit."

"Dad," she whispered, her own eyes welling in response to the self-blame etched into his face.

Her father shook his head as his eyes closed tiredly and he turned back to the summer dusk.

Bella took a deep breath, trying to center herself as the light spilling from the house behind them started blurring with her sorrow. After the emotionality of the day - hell, the whole freaking week - she was just worn out. And somehow dealing with Jacob's anger was just so much easier than with this pain.

He sniffed and his eyes opened back to the woods before them. " 'Member when you used to have me check in the closet for monsters?" He laughed humorlessly. "The first two summers after your mom left. You were what three an' four?"

Bella blinked the tears down her cheeks as she nodded and gripped the railing tighter.

"Well I feel like when it really counted, I didn't check."

"Is that what you think?" Bella asked hoarsely. "That Jake's a _monster_?"

Her father's face jerked to hers and his eyes did several brusque circuits. Throwing himself back from the railing, he rubbed his palms harshly over his face. "He turns into a giant rabid _dog_, Bella!" his hands slapped down against his thighs. "That chases … fuckin' _vampires_!" he said the word with a squint and a disbelieving shake of his head.

"Wolf," she corrected crisply, the word calcified by protective heat. "He turns into a _wolf_, and it's not like he had a freaking _choice _about it."

Her hands found her hips as her stubborn temper started building steam. "And his _outside _might change but Jake's still got the best heart around!"

There was no help for it, in a second flat she was nearly yelling, not that it mattered much with the supernatural ears in the house.

"He's my best friend and I _love _him... you _know _I've always loved him! And I'm not the kind of girl to jump ship just because things get tough!"

Her father's face looked like it was flickering between his own bullheaded temper (she'd inherited it, after all) and some other emotion entirely. But _Bella _knew that emotion - she'd seen it in his face when she got calls from a certain woman they both knew. She lowered her voice to a hiss:

"_Or did you want me to be like mom?"_

Her father's eyes widened in surprise that she _had _actually gone there.

Pressing her lips together, Bella turned her back on an expression that was like looking at an open wound. She didn't want to hurt him, but he _needed _to understand. And he needed to heal himself - it had been far too long - and sometimes it was just better to rip off the scab and try again.

Or that's what she told herself.

She gripped the railing tightly as she tried to distract herself with the silent fireflies winking like fallen stars. She could feel Jacob's energy, warm and shimmering and stretched out subtly in the wings like the soundtrack for those summer fireflies. Just enough to let her know he was there.

She heard her father blow out a long breath and then the rustle of his jeans and flannel as he moved across the porch. And for a second, Bella panicked.

_Was this it?_ _Could this be the way it was going to go?_

There was no question that she would chose Jacob sadly over her father if it came to that.

The old porch swing groaned as Charlie collapsed heavily into it and she heard him huff out another tired sigh.

But, then again, she might not have to. Yet.

The swing creaked. "I just got you back," he whispered, almost too quiet for her human ears to hear. "And this afternoon I basically watched my baby girl _get married_."

And suddenly Bella understood (always had, really) _that this _was what it was really about.

Losing her.

Bella squeezed her eyes closed for a moment and then turned around. Her father was watching her with eyes that bled both longing and regret from where he was collapsed over, his forearms braced on his thighs.

"I _am _spending my life with him, dad," she whispered, soft and soothing but firm like she was talking to a wounded wolf (she kind of was). "But you always _liked _Jake and you _know _he's gonna take real good care of me."

She crossed the porch slowly watching a million thoughts and emotions flicker through his eyes.

"And he's going to do it _here_, in Forks... La Push. Near _you_," she murmured, pausing to let that sink in.

Her lips flickered with a tentative smile. "But he hasn't asked me to marry him... not yet."

Charlie sniffed a soggy laugh - at nothing really - and slapped a gruff hand down his face, pushing some of that oozing hurt back under the surface.

"Might hafta talk to him about that," he grumbled sitting back on the swing and stretching his arm over the back of it. He met her eyes.

Only a quarter of a conversation was verbal with Charlie and she didn't have to be asked twice. Bella threw herself down beside him, pushing her face into his shoulder as his arm folded her fiercely to his side.

"You're just so young, Bells," he whispered, pressing an uncharacteristic kiss to her forehead.

She didn't really have an answer for that one. "Not everything happens like you plan," she mumbled into flannel and Old Spice. She knew he understood that because her parents had gotten married because she was born.

"I mean are you gonna finish school? College?" His questions were soft and afraid. Charlie liked to plan things too. "Live down here? Live with Billy?"

"We haven't figured it out yet, dad," she whispered, though it was partially a lie. Bella, of course, had mulled over several rough plans but she was also starting to learn that some of the best things in life weren't scripted.

"But he's giving me something I've been wanting all my life." She lifted her head. "You are too," she breathed looking into his eyes blinking back at her only a foot away.

"A home."

Charlie's lips bunched up under his mustache and he smoothed a calloused, hardworking hand over her cheek. His gaze paced between her new iridescent amber eyes intensely.

"Dunno how long it's gonna take me to get used these," he breathed, sidestepping actually acknowledging the novel intimacy between them.

But only a quarter of conversation with Charlie used words.

Bella dove back into his shoulder and his weathered palm clasped her cheek to his heart protectively. She couldn't remember a time when her father had held her this long - he'd always been uncomfortable with touch. But right now he showed no signs of letting her go.

The swing started swaying slowly and Bella rearranged her self on the seat and wrapped her arms around his ribcage and just reveled in his touch.

"Those eyes. That's when I knew all this crap was real," he murmured, his voice rumbling under her ear. "Billy chewed my ear off this mornin' about all this imprinting business but I kept thinkin'...hopin'..." he let the thought dwindle into the dark and quiet yard.

From pond down the road, frogs were just starting to call to the crickets hemming the falling night. And to that backdrop Charlie fell into a silent conversation with his daughter, apologies, fear, regret, worry, hope... all the unspoken communicated clearly in his fierce embrace. Slowly rocking her back and forth, making up for lost time.

And Bella thought maybe he'd been wrong - he wasn't losing her at all.

He was finding her for the first time.

'

"You think the timing's right tonight or tomorrow?" Billy asked from across the card table in the converted shed that Emily used as her studio.

Jacob pushed his lip through his teeth as he stretched an arm over the back of the old battered couch spattered with dried paint.

"Well I got Sam and Paul running the north border, planting the seeds that I'm losing it," he couldn't help his dark smirk.

He'd Ordered both wolves not to think of most of today, except when he'd almost ripped out Old Quil's throat. And shamefully there was plenty of shit they could think about over the last few days that was the perfect fucking fodder to paint a picture that he was already certifiably nuts.

But Jacob didn't regret a thing - he was using his _own _weakness as an advantage this time (like he did with his Pack) to craft the perfect gloat-worthy story for James.

He just hoped Edward took it to him.

"How's that going?" Billy asked with a tip of his head.

Jacob nodded. Sam was doing awesome - it was one of his best ideas to date to get him back into control.

"So I'm thinking tomorrow morning," Jacob ventured as his mind ran scenarios. "James'll wait to find out what Charlie has to say ..." He paused and met the man's eyes. "You think Charlie will do it?"

Billy nodded resolutely. " 'Know he will."

Jacob lifted his brow.

" 'Cause, as your father, I'd do it for you," he replied quietly. "He'll certainly do it for his little girl."

Jacob rearranged himself uncomfortably on the couch. Truthfully he had started thinking about this man across from him as being totally different from his father. Billy had stepped up to the plate and into his own inheritance with a power and purpose that both the wolf and man in Jacob had to respect. And that's why he'd tested Jacob throughout that whole fucking meeting: to show him - and the council - that they could be Chief and Alpha before father and son.

Even Jacob was starting to believe him.

Bella had been absolutely correct in her assessment. Billy had been waiting to step into his position of leadership because it was already irreversibly changing their relationship. Not necessarily in a bad way either; this was the kind of relationship he _now __needed _with his father.

"They're almost done," Jacob asserted quietly. The Pack would be back any minute and he wanted to talk to Charlie before that.

"Sam and Paul?" his father asked, rearranging himself in his seat.

Jacob shook his head with a frown as he checked in with his mate using their gifts; she was still contentedly swinging in his arms. They deserved this time. "Bella and Charlie," he murmured absently.

It was the deathly silence across the table that had Jacob blink back into attention. His father was staring at him intensely from under a furrowed brow.

"You can hear 'em?" his father checked carefully.

Well he _could_, but that just meant porch swing hinges; Charlie had never been much of a talker.

At his father's veiled expression, Jacob considered lying, but thought better of it. He hadn't quite decided how much he wanted to share about their gifts yet, but from a purely tactical perspective, his father should probably know about this one.

"In my head," he replied simply.

Billy blinked several times - a severe expression in that habitually impassive facade.

"Just Bella," he amended quickly, a flash of humor passing over his lips (he _so _did not want to know what Charlie thought about him right now). "We can talk."

He heard Billy's squirting swallow. "Like Pack mind?" he asked quietly.

Jacob shook his head with a sniff. "Way different. Better." The expression on his father's face looked so constipated that Jacob almost laughed out loud. But he really wasn't in the mood for more old man stories and hocus pocus.

Plus they'd already run out of time - Embry, Quil and Claire had just pulled up in the drive.

"Look dad," Jacob huffed. "I just wanted you to know in case-"

"I'm gonna show you somethin,'" his father interrupted so resolutely that Jacob's brow furrowed with displeasure. The Alpha in him didn't like to take orders from the Chief or his father or _anyone_.

The old man turned around and fumbled with the back pouch on his wheelchair while Jacob rolled his eyes and searched for patience as he started reworking his strategy now that the older wolves were home.

The man turned back around with strange expression on his face and his hand unceremoniously plopped a small leather bag on the table.

Jacob sprang back, knocking over the couch as he bared teeth with a rabid snarl.

"**WHY THE FUCK DID YOU BRING THAT HERE!"**

His father had wheeled back several feet in self defense, but his face was strangely calm. He waited several moments for him to settle as Jacob's breaths shredded harshly through his teeth.

Finally the old man licked his lips. "What is it, Jacob?" he asked quietly, evenly.

Jacob blinked rapidly over eyes that were aching in their sockets from the heat. His brow furrowed as he returned his gaze to the card table and that strange little pouch. It smelled _old_ that's all he could really tell.

"I don't know," he whispered as his face crumpled in confusion.

_He hated it. It shouldn't be inside. He didn't want it within a million fucking miles of his mate._

His heart was racing, his stomach churning, his world turning upside down.

Quil jerked open the door to the shed and Jacob turned on him, a savage growl ripping from his chest. His Packmate blanched and took a step back. Behind him he could see Embry standing in front of a frantic Bella being restrained by her father.

His eyes locked on her like the first glimpse of land after years at sea.

Jacob had never before felt such an overwhelming sense of vertigo and Bella was the only shelter in this shit storm.

He _needed _her.

"Honey," he choked and took several staggering steps toward the door.

When Charlie didn't release her immediately, he met the man's gaze with an instantly vicious snarl. Charlie frowned, color rushing to his face.

"It's okay, dad," Bella whispered. "Trust me."

Her father hesitantly let her go, and she pushed past the hulking wolves into the studio and straight into Jacob's protective arms.

At her comforting touch and scent, finally the world stopped spinning enough so he could breathe again.

His eyes returned to the table, darting suspiciously between that thing and his father as he pulled her back to the edge of the room as far as he could go.

"Quil, what do you see?" Jacob choked.

But he should have known.

"Um, your dad, Emily's studio, a painting of-..."

Jacob's growl shut him up quickly. "On the table," he bit out.

Quil sauntered into the room with his lanky walk and Embry followed after like a jungle cat. Quil fearlessly picked that thing up in his hand and tossed it up in the air once, turning around with an unfettered smile.

"Just some old bag, Jake."

Infinitely more sensitive, Embry's gaze was pacing between the abomination in Quil's hand and Jacob. But at his worried frown and subtle jerk of his chin, Jacob followed his gaze to his mate.

Bella's eyes were glued to bag.

And she was _weeping..._ so deeply that not a sound or breath had escaped.

Immediately Jacob's own turmoil was smothered by concern as he quickly turned her around and squatted in front of her. "Hey, hey, heyyyy," he crooned, wiping a tender thumb over her streaming tears. "What's wrong, honey?"

Bella choked on a hiccup. She bit her lip as she shook her head.

His eyes paced between hers, looking for clues - this was way beyond the distress she'd walked in here with. He could _feel _her devastation.

"Is it the bag?" he asked in no more than a breath as he caught the tears that kept coming.

A blush of chagrin rushed under his fingertips as Bella hitched an uncomfortable shoulder to her ear. With a final worried circuit of her face, Jacob stood and pulled her soundly to his chest. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and then turned on his father with protective heat.

"What the fuck is it?" Jacob spat skewering him with demand.

Quil had put the bag back down and both wolves had moved back from the table. Charlie was standing just inside the door with an expression that was clearly looking forward to Billy's answer about as much as Jake.

Billy wet his lips, all his habitual nonchalance shed for intensity.

It scared Jacob something fierce.

"This was Taha Aki's bag, Jacob," his father murmured carefully. "In it, he put the ashes of the Cold One who killed his sons."

Jacob could only stare at him, the muscles twitching below his eyes. He knew that story well - it had always been his and Bella's favorite.

The room disappeared around him as blood thrummed in his ears as implications tumbled over him like a tsunami.

"They were the sons of our last Great Chief and his Third Wife and true mate," his father continued quietly in a soft and pointed croon. "It was said they were so deeply bound that they shared eyes, heart and mind."

Jacob squeezed his eyes closed as his pulse jack-knifed through his body. It explained so much of this craziness... with just more fucking craziness!

And it was the last straw to blow his overburdened mind.

"He was foretold to return and the Council believes his Wolf Spirit has returned... in you. That's why you recognize it."

Bella's hitching breaths silenced and he felt her little arms squeezing his ribcage. Then she resolutely released him..

"It was said it in the next great time of turmoil Taha Aki would ret-..."

"**Stop."**

Bella whipped around with a voice that was clear and commanding. "He told you to _wait_," she bit out, nothing short of acid.

He felt her turn back and her cool hand slithered up his chest to his jaw.

'_It doesn't freaking matter, Jacob,' _her voice billowed through his mind like a summer breeze. _'None of it.. not right now. I love you. We're still Jake n' Bells.'_

His eyes popped open, fiery and focused instantly in hers.

She was right... of course. Whether this was their first time around or the fiftieth, he still had a woman to love, a people to protect and a job to do. And he was letting the rest of it fuck with his head. There'd be time later for this bullshit, right now he couldn't afford it.

He was letting _other people_'s agendas get in the way of _his_. Of protecting his tribe, his Pack.. his mate?

_No fucking way._

He leaned down and pressed a grateful kiss to her forehead and then stoically panned the room of stunned silent faces until his eyes landed in on the Council's Chief.

"Embry, Quil," he spoke directly into the man's gaze.

"_Burn it._ We're making _new _history now."

'

"One woman barefoot and the other pregnant?"

Paul strode into the kitchen from his patrol with a cocky swagger. "Ahh... _this _is how it's s'posed to be."

"Ugh," Bella groaned, disgusted. "Make yourself useful Lahote and help Embry shuck the corn."

"Women's work," he snorted, panning the room of imprints working (and Leah and Seth at the table). He ended on Embry with a smirk. "All except the Pack's honorary pussy."

Sam cuffed him upside the head with a deafening crack at the same time Embry lobbed an ear of corn like a projectile at Paul's face - which was of course was deftly caught with those damn supernatural reflexes they all shared.

Bella had been rooting for Embry all the way.

"We are **not **making a habit of this," Bella snorted, as Sam continued unerringly across the kitchen and wrapped Emily into an embrace and kiss that made Bella blush. Kim met her eyes with a knowing grin as she put a tray of the fried chicken into the oven.

Actually Bella had a plan for these guys (and she was pretty sure they weren't going to like it): one of her father's friends was a firefighter and the way they took turns cooking and cleaning seemed like it might work. She actually didn't mind cooking for them because she loved to cook... but seven days a week, every meal? That _so _wasn't going to fly.

"How'd it go?" Leah called from the table where she was sitting with a glass of water and _trying _not to look as worn out as poor Seth. As new wolves, their stamina still wasn't up to the same par - Jared had had to switch them out for Quil.

"Good," Paul answered (since Sam was still otherwise occupied) as he sat down with a huff beside Embry who was dutifully peeling corn.

And petulantly jerked up an ear. (Paul liked to pretend he was badder than he was.)

Bella turned the chicken in the frying pan with the tongs and then looked back out the kitchen window at the lighted shed just off to the side of the yard.

Jacob and his father were still discussing plans. _Her _father had left 20 minutes ago because Charlie had said he didn't want to "gum up his mind with more wrong memories" which made sense for their plan.

The plan Bella hated.

But she knew Jacob wasn't happy about it either... for different reasons. With her father and his, she'd listened as they'd hammered out a strategy that _seemed _like it would work (it was certainly complicated enough - but what did she know?), but it also meant she'd have to get closer to the Cullens than Jacob could stand.

But apparently he'd have to because they needed to push James' hand so he made his move on _their _terms and didn't either lose patience with Edward or throw them any curve balls. So her father's job would be to convince them that he was worried that Jacob was going to make a run for it and ask for their help. In fact, he was meeting with Carlisle and the others early tomorrow morning.

Charlie hadn't seen Cullens since that fateful day at the hospital when Jacob had announced he needed to take sides. Charlie was meeting with the Cullens to tell them he'd finally taken sides alright... _against Jacob._

Because Jacob was losing it and he was afraid for his daughter.

Even with a mindreader, Charlie'd assured the three of them that he'd have absolutely _no problem _convincing the vampires of this story with the stuff he had in his head (said with a dark smirk that had pulled a growl from her mate).

And at the point the wolves would take it from there - a plot that would lay down their lives to keep her safe.

It all made her physically sick.

Closing her eyes for a moment, she tried to reset. She _had _to be better than this.

A hot grease spatter on her hand was a very effective reminder of the moment. With a soft sigh, Bella looked down at her work and started pulling out the over-fried pieces of chicken.

Funny thing was, around her the banter and laughter had quieted too right along with her darkening mood. The Pack was so _in tune_. She understood a lot more about what Jake had said about his balance directing affecting his wolves.

Being as sensitive as he was, of course, Paul chose that moment to proffer one of his clumsy attempts at reaching out.

"Embry you should be way faster me," he snorted, brazenly tossing a husk in the trash. "All that time you spend with your fucking hand?" He used the stripped ear of corn to lewdly illustrate his point.

It was pretty much Bella's last straw.

"**Paul**!" she yelled, turning on him with a scowl that made his eyebrows shoot up to his hairline.

Suddenly the radio sounded blaringly loud over the crackle of oil and bubbling of water on the stove.

It was only then she realized the room had gone as still as death and all eyes had hit the floor.

And she truly processed what she'd done. Her eyes panned the room of bowed heads in utter dismay.

_Was this even _part _of her job description?_

Bella certainly wasn't used to being in any kind of position of authority (and didn't want to be now, as a matter of fact). Her mind desperately searched for traction

But Jacob had said to just be herself, right? Well, before all these confusing new boundaries and roles she was trying to negotiate, she'd always been a good friend first. And while she was sensitive to why Paul did what he did and even his clumsy but kinda benevolent motives ... Embry had always stood at Jake's side. He held a tender place in her heart.

But to say it was _painfully _unnerving to have a whole room of people looking dutifully at their toes was a gross understatement, if ever there was one. She frowned, unsure of how to get out of this and what to do next. But one thing was sure, she wasn't going to bother Jake asking for help. She needed to step up and be his mate no matter how crazy things were.

Bella drew in a deep breath.

"Paul, we're all under alotta stress and everyone's doing their best," she said quietly. "Just lay off tonight." She swallowed thickly. "Please?" She tried to soften the discomfort of actually giving a command (as pitifully timid as it was).

Shockingly, Paul nodded and without a word picked up another ear of corn as various eyes cut up from the floor.

Grimacing at herself, she wiped her hands on her shorts nervously as she turned around. Kim met her gaze with a kind smile.

"Sorry," Bella mouthed.

Kim shook her head, her grin growing roots. "_Somebody_ needed to do it," she muttered out of the side of her mouth, going back to putting the chicken on a tray. Slowly movement and noise resumed around the kitchen.

"Shit, we gotta listen to his bitch too?" Leah's mutter to her brother was just loud enough for Bella to hear, so of course every last head jerked up.

Again utter silence swallowed the room down its slick tense throat. This time it felt like even the radio and stove top hushed too, but it was probably just the rush of blood in her ears on its way to her face.

Drawing in a deep breath, against every single impulse, Bella _didn't_ tuck her head but - raging blush and all - turned and met Leah's challenging gaze head-on.

"Like it or not, we all need to stick together," she spoke quietly, but sure and true.

"Yeah, shut the fuck up, Lee," surprisingly it was _Paul's _voice that spoke up over the low rumbling growls...

...and the sound of the shed door slamming open with a bang.

_It was fucking time._

Leah had been wearing on Jacob's nerves for year now and as testy as he already was with shit that was weighing so heavily on his shoulders, the slight to his imprint was the tipping point that had started a flash flood.

He'd been listening (of course). Bella had always stood up for her friends so he wasn't surprised by the way she'd handled Paul and a situation that he _knew _made her uncomfortable. In some ways he kind of hated stepping into his imprint's fight when she'd done so well.

She'd condensed everything he'd been trying to teach his Pack this year down to a single turn of phrase.

But along with simple his jackhammer blood pressure, instinct _demanded _he slap the insubordination down. He needed to break Leah in or fucking shut her up right this very second. For her safety as well as his Pack. It was unacceptable to her tearing at his wolves.

Especially not now.

He wasn't blind - he knew, while his Pack gratefully welcomed him back without question - they also still hadn't healed from his abandonment.

Yes, they_ all needed_ to hear what he had to say.

In several brisk strides he was leaping the porch steps and ripping open the screen door.

He just needed to keep his human head - easier said than done.

"Leah," her name came out in a hybrid growl.

She was already standing up at the table trying to keep the fear out of her eyes - she couldn't hide it in her scent.

Her Packmates had all backed up to the edges of the room, leaving Jacob a wide berth.

"I warned you," he hissed, slick and deadly, his shoulders automatically pulling back as his stomach rippled with a growl. The wolf in him - that was already craving violence in defense of his mate - wanted blood.

He prowled toward her all predator and purpose as someone slapped the fucking radio silent.

Leah's eyes finally lost the fight and her pupils contracted as her scent sharpened in a way that just made the animal in him go wild.

But luckily he also had a leader's stone cold acumen and man's warm heart to temper the beast that burned through his veins. She slowly backed away from him which was a huge fucking mistake - he hadn't yet drilled it into her and Seth's head.

Never give chase.

'_Jake, she's scared,' _Bella's voice was like a cooling salve in his boiling brain. He tossed a chair thoughtlessly out of the way and rounded the table to where the wolf had backed herself up against the wall.

'_She's wounded. She needs to understand she's safe and that she's not the only one.' _His mate showed her usual insight - with a nice wolfy twist. Bella already understood the dynamics of Pack.

'_Love you.'_

Just the soft feel of that warm heart, beating in his words, made Bella feel a million times better. Even though her mind knew it wasn't, she felt like it was all her fault and she hadn't been sure he was fully in control.

And when he was like this, he was pretty freaking scary.

Leah tried to twist away, but Jacob stopped the girl with lightning reflexes and threw her back in place against the wall under his steely stare. He then quickly clasped his hands behind his back.

"You're being pretty fucking stupid right now, Lee," Jacob hissed like pressurized steam. "And just like I do with Paul or anyone else, I'm gonna set you straight. Got it?"

Leah's swallow was visible as her nostrils flared with her fear

"_First_, never run from a wolf. Especially mine," he breathed over a low dark chuckle. "Second, you're being a _selfish little bitch_ and have been since you joined this Pack. And I've tried so fucking hard to be patient."

Leah licked her lips as her gaze drifted uncomfortably down to the floor.

"You're so hung up on hating me, being pissed at Sammy and Em, wallowing in your own shit that you can't think of anything but yourself," he spat hatefully. "And you' got _no excuse_ now, Lee. You've _seen _what they went through in every one of our heads. How hard they fought this thing, how much they _hurt_."

Bella could see the muscles bulging in Jacob's arms he had his hands clasped so fiercely behind him as he leaned down in her face and she shrank away. "And you think you're the _only one _who knows anything about pain?" he laughed humorlessly and then turned his back on her.

"Every one of us has our scars, every fucking one us," his incandescent eyes panned the room landing on Paul. "Paul and Claire got the _shit _beat out of them since the day they were born," he whispered and then turned to his friend beside him. "Embry never even _knew _his dad." He looked up again at his Pack. "And Quil lost his when he was seven... his mom a few years later. I lost mine when I was nine and've been taking care of my dad ever since until I inherited this hell with _no one _to tell me what the fuck to do!"

He cut over to her side of the room and met Bella's gaze.

'_Can I tell them?'_

Bella swallowed thickly under those luminous eyes. She _knew _what he was asking... and what he was doing. He was breaking them all down so they could rebuild together... kind of like she'd done with her dad.

Without the slightest censure or pressure for her answer, Jacob continued on in a soft murmur. "Jared and Kim lost scholarships and futures and homes."

His gaze again swept the room of wolves and mates.

Bella followed it; every last one of them was watching him with rapt _human eyes_. She could see it in their expressions and posture - they weren't standing in that uncanny attention like elite troops, they were watching him with pain on their faces and longing in their eyes.

And it was then Bella truly understood just how crazy-good this play was: their lupine instincts were controlled by domination and fear, but their humanity was ruled by love, family and home.

Jacob was talking to their _hearts_.

"Every single wolf in here knows what it's like for bones to break over and over after weeks of fucking pain," he hissed. "But little Brady got his leg _ripped _off by a leech while Collin watched."

'_Yes,' _Bella sent back suddenly even as she settled her shoulders with a steeling lift of her chin.

This was going to hurt, she knew it. But _everyone_ in here was hurting... and they could only heal if it was together.

Jacob's eyes darted back to hers to double check and Bella nodded imperceptibly.

He promptly whipped back around on Leah who had her lips pressed together against losing the emotion in liquid eyes.

"And _my mate_. Bella..." he whispered, again clasping his hands behind him as he slunk back toward her with a deceptively casual stride. "On top of having a flaky drunk-assed excuse for a mom, she got attacked by the very same psycho that killed your dad..."

He stopped no more than a foot away from her and cocked his head in a decidedly lupine movement. "And y'know what he did?" Jacob chuckled darkly, it was a low frightening sound. "He slammed her up against a wall and-... " his voice shattered in a growl.

And Bella's head finally bowed under the weight of every eye in the room landing on her, rounded and wide.

"He abused... and _molested_... almost _raped _her," Jacob's words were no more than a low grating rumble. "All to get even with _**us**_."

Bella pressed her back up against the counter, gulping as her heart fluttered in her chest. _Crap_. It was getting hard to breathe! Closing her eyes, she reached up to grip the formica behind her, searching for some kind of grounding while images started flashing behind her eyelids...

Suddenly strong steady arms were circling her... only vaguely familiar arms.

A soft lupine purr awoke in the chest that she was pulled to with such tenderness. He smelled like brother, like Pack, like home.

"You're safe, sister," Sam's deep voice rumbled under her cheek.

Bella nodded against him with a shaking sigh as his scent, his strength, the slow strokes of his fingers in her hair, banished her demons.

Her eyes fluttered open to see Jacob, already halfway across the room toward her, his body quivering and his heated eyes trained intensely on her.

'_I'm okay,' _she soothed.

It was absolutely _killing _him to let even paternal, imprinted Sam step in. Bella's eyes blinked slowly under the soothing grounding sensation of his power that he sent her even in Sam's comforting arms.

But at the same time it was also perfectly illustrating Jacob's point.

He made that point to the room even as he looked deeply into Bella's eyes.

"It was _my mate _who taught me this: that alone, every single one of us is damaged, broken... _weak_," his voice rolled over the room like heated velvet. "But when we stand _together_, no matter what, as _one Pack_, we are strong."

Suddenly his gaze went soft and intimate and for an instant - just and instant - they weren't an Alpha and mate, or some reincarnated legend, or even two teens who'd been shattered by the blunt force trauma of things beyond their years.

They were just Jake n' Bells.

Tears sprang to her eyes and his unfathomable gaze lingered a moment longer.

Then Jacob spun on his heel back on Leah, whose own eyes had finally overrun with shameless tears.

"She was right: we stick together," he murmured deep and quiet like the roll of thunder as two howls eerily threaded the distance, a sound as cool and blue as the moon. "Now, are you ready to join this Pack?"

And, as if the word were cut from one breath, every voice joined Leah's in whispering unison:

"_Yes."_

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_Review if you like._

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**Taha Aki and the Third Wife**

This is an excerpt from fabricated legends of the book as told here: twilightlexiconDOTcom/2007/08/24/chapter-eleven-legends/

"Billy tells the story of how the Quileutes came to be werewolves. They were originally spirit warriors, able to leave their bodies to defend their tribe, but when the last great chief, Taha Aki, merged his spirit with that of a wolf after Utlapa, a traitorous warrior, stole his body, the werewolves were created.

Taha Aki saw his third wife as his true mate and gave up his wolf form so that he could grow old with her. After he had grown old, women in the neighboring Makah tribe began to disappear. The Makahs suspected the Quileutes because of their magic, so Taha Aki charged his eldest wolf-son, Taha Wi, to find the culprit. Taha Wi took five other wolves with him to search the mountains, but sent half the pack home when the trail they followed led them too far north. Tahi Wi and his two brothers never returned.

Taha Aki went to the chief of the Makahs in mourning, and enmity between the tribes ceased. A year later, the disappearances started again. The wolves agreed to help the Makahs, and this time they found a male cold one feeding from a maiden. Only one wolf survived the attack, Yaha Uta, the oldest son of Taha Aki's third wife. He brought the Cold One's corpse back to the village for the elders to see. The corpse tried to reassemble itself, so they set fire to it and separated the ashes into small bags, one of which Billy still possesses. The Cold One's mate came to the village seeking revenge and killed the last wolf protector, Yaha Uta, as well as many of the tribe.

Taha Aki turned into a wolf again in order to fight her, but he was old and she was too strong. The third wife saw his struggle and stabbed herself in front of the Cold Woman to distract her with her blood. The third wife died, but thanks to her sacrifice, Taha Aki was able to destroy the female. Afterwards, Taha Aki stayed with the body of his wife for three days, as a wolf, then and then ran to the forest and never returned."


	20. Vertigo

_This chapter's a pretty good length, please indulge me a few notes beforehand:_

A reader wrote me that they thought I didn't want reviews because I didn't respond to hers, and I want to make sure there is no confusion:

**The ****only**** reason I'm finishing this is because of YOU**_ (and I love your feedback)_.

I've been sucky at hitting you back (esp lately) but I figure you'd rather me finish this in my limited time (plus I don't just send "pat responses" so it takes me hours). Think of this as my 11k note to you, how bout? I will definitely hit back folks who've been so kind to leave their thoughts when I'm done - I read every single one of them (sometimes several times).

Also a couple of people mentioned they thought Jake was too rough with Leah. But, as longtime reader Tunde so kindly said: "I do know that you don't do "things" without purpose" (so she's waiting to see). And she's right: that purpose is made clear next chapter.

Lastly, Tayjayfan kindly has read most chapters through before I post them because I'm terribly insecure and it helps for someone to tell me it doesn't completely suck (though she hasn't for the last few chaps so if they have/do don't blame her for not telling me - I've decided to throw caution to the wind and focus on finishing).

**But** she has finally tried her hand and has posted for the first time (and done a fab job!)! Go check out her first o/sand _show some love_: trickyraven**DOT**ning**DOT**com/group/tricky-raven-one-shots/forum/topics/dance-with-me

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Lyrics: Coldplay "Rush of Blood to the Head"

Take a few seconds to get your head out of RL... (maybe pull up Coldplay's song on youtube and give it a listen while you read). It's spaced kinda funky to ease you in.

**This chapter jumps a day and then back-fills.**

If I did it right it will pop you in the jaw, if I didn't... it will just suck (see above). On all accounts I truly mean it when I say: _thanks for reading and hope you enjoy._

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He said I'm gonna buy this place and burn it down

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I'm gonna put it six feet underground

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He said I'm gonna buy this place and watch it fall

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Stand here beside me baby in the crumbling walls

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Oh I'm gonna buy this place and start a fire

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Stand here until I fill all your heart's desires

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Because I'm gonna buy this place and see it burn

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Do back the things it did to you in return

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**20 Vertigo**

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_no._

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_oh, god no._

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she gasped at air that simply wouldn't fill her lungs.

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"**NO!"**

The single word was finally expelled with what felt like Bella's last breath as she threw herself from the bed, her hand clawing over her bruised and flailing heart. A violent vertigo made the floor undulate under her feet as she careened toward the sound of savage snarls mutilating the night and lacerating her soul.

"_Bella!" _

Suddenly she was jerked into a steely grip that pulled her kicking bare feet off the floor.

"**No! Dad!" **

Her own shriek tore through her burning brain as she hauled her fist up and slammed her elbow fiercely into ribs behind her.

Her father coughed a groan that freed her so abruptly, she tumbled painfully to the floor.

And then Bella was scrabbling across cold hardwood...

_elbows and knees..._

_hands and feet..._

until she could claw her way up to her shattered bedroom window, splinters from the gouged sill embedding under her nails.

A heavy hand fell to her shoulder._ "Bella,"_ her father choked as he stumbled against her.

Wailing, she yanked out of his grip hauling her torso over the ledge.

_She __**needed **__to get to him._

Two fists snapped around her hip bones like a vise leaving her hanging halfway out the window.

She only struggled for a second before she looked up... and froze. Her heart simply surrendered at such a sight laid out across her childhood lawn.

A giant russet wolf was tearing up the sod as it tumbled with a savage snarl and a pale white monster masquerading as a man. An alabaster hand that seemed to glow in the darkness was rent by vicious jaws and tossed aside, pulling a screech through the night like fingernails on a chalkboard.

A second figure - much smaller than the other - hopped like a cricket onto the beast and, with an impossibly lissome twist, the wolf was throwing her off while he lunged at his new foe with snapping maw. In a blur it's first prey rolled free, spinning around to deliver hammering strikes with fist and wrist to the wolf's barrel chest that sounded like thunder.

"NO! _Edward! Alice!_'

"Edward. Alice."

Bella's scream was echoed by a starched velvet voice just below her window and her feverish eyes snapped to the form of Carlisle Cullen. He was flanked by a menacing Emmett and the beautiful Rosalie, wearing a deadly smirk and billowing flaxen hair like a siren's crown.

"_Dr. Cull-..!" _

A rough hand was clapped over her mouth as her father hauled her body over the ruined sill at the same time. Frantically her gaze snapped down below to the two vampires who had somehow tumbled free from the beast and were congealed in hissing defense.

It's eyes molten rage, the wolf's muzzle peeled back from wicked canines and with a roar of fury, he crouched like a coiling spring on powerful hindquarters.

"They have come," Dr. Cullen crooned silkily with a calm that was at complete odds with the scene below her window. "Let the wolves deal with their own, Edward - our quarrel is not with them."

Like acid brought to a rolling boil, growls dissolved his words and eroded the night as a grey and black wolf tore across lawn, muzzles pulled back from gnashing teeth. Jacob spun around, lowering his head to the ground in warning as his savage guttural snarl drizzled liquid hate onto the grass.

Abruptly - in perfect coordinated unison - the smaller wolves leaped with ruthless abandon, attacking their Alpha in a violent flurry of fur, fang and barking growls.

Under her father's firm hand, Bella's scream was muffled into nothing but a jackhammer vibration of her skull.

"This is real ugly, Bells," her father murmured in her ear.

Bella bucked in her father's arms as he yanked her away from the window.

From outside, sounds of unbridled violence scorched the night, yips and howls of pain popping like blisters.

Bella stopped struggling. Physically

"_Shhhh, baby,"_ her father's croon was sandpaper as he dragged her limp body across the floor while, closing her eyes, Bella reached out frantically with the only power she had.

And like she'd grounded a lightning strike, her body arched and spasmed in her father's arms.

'

_Holocaust rage._

_Gutted by flame._

_The landscape of hell itself_

_Burn._

_Mate. _

_Mine. _

_Kill. Kill. Kill._

_Sticky blood, sweet and salty, whipping fury into frenzy._

_Torn pelt, crimson claw, dripping fang._

'_**LEAVE ME!'**_

'

Those two traitorous words echoed painfully through her mind like a sonic boom.

Or the crash of a cement door.

And all Bella was left with were scorched neurons and a charred heart, its remnant ashes, grey and hopeless, fluttering down over galloping sobs.

Gagging on desperation, she squeezed her eyes closed again..._pushing, pushing, pushing._

Against a stone fortress.

Frantically Bella flayed herself open, razing every last defense down to the bone, offering up everything she was while she clawed at her mind for any kind of palliative memory.

But the cancer of hopelessness made every last one metastasize into heartache.

'

_In her yard: 'I have nothing to say... not to you anyway.'_

_In his garage: 'You need to leave."_

_Hard hematite eyes._

_Flaring nostrils._

_She pressed her sobs to stoic lips._

_She threw her arms around a steely torso._

_Broad shoulders resolutely turning away._

'_Jake! '_

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"**ISABELLA!"**

Her eyes popped open to her father's blood red scowl, as he shook her head roughly back and forth.

But it wasn't really his voice that had brought her back...

It was the _silence_.

In the distance, thunder crushed the night as choruses of distant howls streaked up the sky like lightning.

But not a sound came from her yard.

Gasping in fear, Bella tried to turn wild eyes toward her window but her father firmly held her cheeks.

"I'm sorry baby," he was murmuring over and over.

Bella's eyes were rolling in her head. She forced them forward where they staggered and stumbled over her father's furrowed brow, trying to understand his words.

"Bella," her father's voice was hushed, gauzy.

It felt like needles on a wound.

"What did he say, baby? What did Jake tell you?"

_That name. _It pulled a hitching whimper from her throat.

_Best friend, lover, mate._

Bella blinked rapidly several times.

"Remember, Bells? What did he say?"

Bella's burning eyes fluttered closed.

'

_Warm._

_The whisper of entwined breaths._

_The yellowed light of Rachel's bedroom. _

_Lying on the mattress he'd dragged to the floor._

_Panting softly as the rush of pleasure receded, slipping her into the balmy seas of satiation. _

_Bella lifted her head slowly from that sweat slicked chest to find his eyes. Those new eyes - so striking in his complexion - and the pupils stretched so wide that only a thin irised ring remained, still preternaturally heated with pleasure. _

_Bella's lips curved gently in a twilight smile. _

_For just a fleeting moment of time, he was _happy_. And that summer sky peace on his face was so glorious to see. But even while she watched, sticky shadows gathered in his eyes._

_Jacob's lips pressed together as he drew in a long slow breath through his nose and his calloused hand slipped up to caress her cheek. Tenderly he brushed the hairs back from her forehead that were stuck in the dewy condensation of hours of lovemaking. _

" '_Love you more than anything," he whispered, warm and rich like cocoa made on the stove with heavy cream. "You know that right, honey?"_

_But bitter nutmeg portent was sprinkled over the words. Bella's brow furrowed as she lifted her chin from her fist and nodded. _

_His eyes squeezed closed briefly over a swallow that jerked his Adam's apple. When his eyes found hers again they were sad. _

"_What's wrong?" she asked quietly._

"_You know I'd do anything to keep you safe?"_

_Bella's heart stuttered as she sat up more. "Jake-..?"_

"_Shhh..." His hand smoothed soothingly over her cheek as he pulled her gently back down to his chest._

_A low soothing sound rumbled under her and his analgesic power rippled over her like warm honey. She really couldn't do anything but melt against him, her budding anxiety expelled in a buttery sigh._

"_So this is going to be hard, Bells," he whispered. A single calloused finger ghosted over her jaw while his gaze covertly memorized each pore. _

_Bella's eyes paced between his, desperately searching for what what he wasn't saying. _

"_It's gonna be _really fucking hard_,_" _he breathed as his arms slithered slowly around her and then wound her body, tight and covetous, against his. _

_He shook his head as his eyes snapped shut. _

_Bella lowered her chin back to her hand and waited. It was one of the harder things she'd ever done. _

"_I can't tell you everything," he whispered._

_Bella's face jerked up with a scowl. _

_But _t_hat _expression _- she'd never seen it before on his face. It was sharp and jagged and drove effortlessly straight through her heart making it stop completely: pure, tormented, undisguised anguish. _

_And in that moment Bella decided she'd happily give him _whatever he needed without question_. She'd do _anything _to ease whatever burden had put such an expression on this strong, dauntless man._

_Without a word, she lowered her cheek to his chest and wrapped her arms up around his bulky shoulders, holding him... holding on to him... just holding. _

"_And it might get messy," he murmured, his voice rumbling under her ear over the slow mournful beat of his heart. "It might get bad." _

_Bella squeezed her eyes closed as she bit into her lip just to contain the cold wash of fear that wanted to escape in frantic pleas or questions. _

_Was she ready for this? After all the trauma, heartache and just the sheer exhaustion of this last week were _any of them_?_

_It didn't matter - they had to be. Welcome to Jacob's world._

_Her world now._

_Hers._

"_Okay," she whispered._

_That single word seemed to deflate a measure of his anxiety and she rode the descent of his heaving sigh._

"_But do you trust me, Bella? Do you really trust me?" _

_The question jerked her head up again with an indignant frown. A shadow of humor flickered over his lips but he simply raised his brow expectantly._

"_Of course I trust you," she whispered straight from her heart. _

"_Good," he gave her a sad smile as a palm came up to mold to her cheek. "Remember that. No matter how bad it gets, Bells... remember."_

'

Bella's sucked in a sharp breath as her eyes popped open.

Could _this _be part of his plan too?

This horrible hateful plan?

Her father's meeting had gone well apparently because shortly after, Billy had received a call from Carlisle with an ultimatum delivered in icy words: release Bella to her father or the Cullens would intervene.

And that was indeed the plan.

Not only did it play into Jacob's ploy to ensnare James, but Billy and her father had decided there was no safer place she could be than...

Behind enemy lines.

Jacob, of course, had simply paced the floor, snarling like a caged rabid animal, but in the end he'd relented even though it tore him apart.

From there it had unfolded like a nightmare.

She had no idea where Jacob had gone while Billy, Sam and Paul had driven Bella to the Rez border where her father was waiting with the whole Cullen clan in tow. (Actually looking rather smug, she'd thought.) So it hadn't been difficult to play her part... in fact she hadn't been acting at all.

His muscles jerking like livewires under her sobbing cheek - but his face stoically severe - Paul had ended up dragging her across the border and shoving her into her father's arms.

After that, it was all a blur.

There in her childhood home while silent tears trickled down her cheeks, Dr. Cullen had checked her over with patronizing words of comfort.

And then shot her full sedatives. Charlie hadn't said a word.

"Bella, what happened?" her father's voice was hoarse.

Blinking back to focus in her father's worried bloodshot eyes, Bella went limp like a marionette whose strings had been snipped and he finally released her to the floor. She briskly rubbed her face with hands that shook like hummingbird wings while her adrenaline-addled brain tried to make sense of any of it.

Was it even possible that this _was not _what it looked like: A berserker Jacob clawing his way up the side of her house, ripping Edward from the window? And then so out of control he'd had to be taken down by his _own Pack_?

But the thing was, Jacob hadn't been acting. She'd _felt _it. Even before he'd exploded through her window, she'd _felt it_.

There'd been no _man _left in that beast.

"Bella..."

Bella's face snapped up, her wide eyes pacing between her fathers. "He was in my room," she croaked, her throat raw from clawing screams.

"Who was, Bells?" Some of that anxiety slipped from his face at her return to some semblance of sanity.

"E-Edward," she whispered.

She didn't remember falling asleep (hadn't thought it wasn't possible out of Jacob's arms), but whether it was the drugs or simply despair, Bella had awoken from nightmares with the cold creeping feeling that someone was in her room. And that now familiar not-quite-so-terrifying-but-still-repulsive scent of the Cullens burning her nose.

She'd lurched up with a squeak to find him sitting, still and silent in the corner rocking chair, and watching her with strange unblinking eyes.

_Edward Cullen._

It was the last thing she remembered. Before he was crouched between her and the deafening roar of the wolf crashing through her window, his muzzle foaming with rage and butchery in his eyes.

"What was he doing?" her father's voice brought her back.

Bella drew in a slow breath and released it, still trying to find footing in this pit of broken glass.

"Watching me sleep," she whispered.

"What?" The word calcified along with the lines of his face.

Bella swallowed thickly, every word was arduous to push past her numb lips. "When I asked him... he said he was watching me sleep."

Her father's face had darkened in the dim light; she idly wondered if it was turning red. "Why the fuck was-...?"

His question was lopped off by a sharp rapping at the door.

Charlie's mustache buckled as his eyes darted toward the hall and then back to her. "I think it's the doctor..." he began, yanking in a deep breath and letting it out slowly through his nose. "I gotta-..."

"Don't leave me," Bella gasped, pouncing frantically to fist her hands in the flannel shirt he hadn't changed since Saturday.

The knock was repeated more urgently.

"Shhh... of course I won't baby," he soothed as Charlie's gaze took worried inventory.

Gently he peeled her hands from his shirt.

"Chief Swan?"

At the voice behind her, Bella whipped around with a shriek as her father pulled her into his side. There in the battered broken window, hanging from the tree, was Emmett with a wry and relaxed smile.

"Carlisle needs to talk to you before the cops get here," he grinned, swinging jauntily from the branch above his head.

"We're comin'," her father gruffly informed him as he started pulling her up off the floor.

Bella stumbled to her feet on stiff unsteady limbs as he wrapped his arm around her waist. In the distance a roll of thunder shook the mountains and a low lone howl threaded the barren sky. A shiver ran down Bella's spine.

Her father reached out to grab the quilt from the back of the rocking chair.

"No!" she choked.

Her father frowned.

"It stinks," she whispered. Because it did... she could still smell him. The Cullens didn't smell nearly as bad as James, but still...

With a quizzical shake of his head, her father guided her toward the hall.

He helped her gingerly down the stairs but at the bottom he murmured, "so Bells what did he say?"

Bella stopped on the last step, looking up at him with a confused squint.

Her father licked his lips. "I gotta know baby, did he say anything about what they were plannin'?"

Bella just stared at him as her mouth incrementally fell open with each little hitching breath. Upstairs she'd thought he'd been trying to be _comforting _by reminding her of whatever words Jacob must have prepared her with for this ordeal.

But now here he was in their living room with a vampire just outside the door asking about _the plan?_

She was so shocked she certainly couldn't make her mouth work, even if she'd known what the hell to say. She jerked out of his arms, making her point clear enough as she skewered him with disbelief.

Charlie pursed his lips and just stared right on back. Finally he blew a breath out from under his mustache and clomped into the living room to snatch the afghan from the back of the couch. He tossed it her way as he moved to the front door.

It dropped, unheeded, to the stairs.

Another roll of thunder rumbled through the house as the storm moved closer. Her father opened the door as a flash of lightning eerily lit the pale white figure standing patiently on their porch.

"Sorry," Charlie wiped his hands on his jeans and stepped to the side. "Y'wanna come in, doctor?"

"Thank you Chief Swan, but first I believe we have some business outside," he smiled with that cold flat graciousness. His eyes darted into the house and met Bella's and he broadened his smile with a little nod.

Bella's eyes fell to the floor.

"We've _taken care_ of the neighbors," he said meaningfully.

" 'Preciate that."

"But one of them - it appears - put a call into your station," Carlisle paused. "They're about two minutes away."

Bella collapsed onto the bottom step, wrapping her arms around her middle while her mind spun out.

"Unfortunately the side of your house is, ah... _damaged_," he said delicately. "I was wondering if you'd give us permission to pull your tree down as the counterfeit culprit." A soft chuckle fluttered over the words.

"Whatever you gotta do," her father dismissed. "Bells?"

Her face jerked up.

He was looking at her over his shoulder, but her eyes automatically darted past him to where Carlisle was watching her carefully.

"I gotta go with the doctor for a minute," he said, shoving his hands in his jeans. "You want one of 'em to sit with you while I'm gone?"

Bella shook her head briskly.

"We'll be right outside, Bella," Carlisle said smoothly. "The wolves seemed to have pulled him deep into the woods - I've sent Rosalie to check on them. But you're safe now, child, and I promise we'll keep it that way."

The only thing she heard was that Jacob had been _pulled _somewhere. _By his wolves._ Worry burned up any sense at all like a flame to combustible tinder. The only thing she could do was mutely collapse against the wall in despair.

A loud crack and then crash made her jump to her feet with a little shriek.

"They just took down the tree, Bells," her father murmured as his gaze washed over her for a moment... and then he shut the door behind him.

Leaving Bella completely alone.

And she was _alone_... she couldn't feel him.

Every time she tried reaching out with her mind, there was simply nothing there. An abyss. A dark cold yawning abyss.

And it was frightening. She didn't realize how much she'd unconsciously grown accustomed to the psychic warmth of him on the edges of her mind in only these last _two days_. But it made sense: it wasn't so different from his warm shoulder against hers as they sat side-by-side on their driftwood tree on First Beach.

They'd always leaned on one another.

For a moment she just stood there, watching the silent blue lights flash along with the lightning over the dark living room. She swayed on her feet and caught herself against the wall.

She felt strange... dizzy.

An intense vertigo - similar to when she'd seen Billy's bag on the table - like the entire world as she knew it was turning inside out.

_Surely her father hadn't really switched sides._

_Had he?_

She crouched slowly, keeping her hand on the wall. Numbly she picked up the afghan and wrapped it around her shoulders while her mind searched for traction. She staggered toward the couch.

_Surely Jacob hadn't really gone mad._

_Had he?_

He'd asked her to trust him.

And she trusted Jacob, she _did_.

But she'd also seen just how close he was to the edge over these last few days, and she certainly didn't blame him! In fact she was shocked he hadn't lost it months ago with all he'd had to deal with on top the hormones, instinct and anger that had come with his transformation.

Yet man or beast, she trusted him unequivocally with her life, there was no question on that part.

Bella collapsed on the couch, pulling her knees up to her chin and wrapping the blanket around them.

If Jacob was lying somewhere, crazy like Sam, and _injured_... _oh God,_ they wouldn't (couldn't) _kill _him would they?!

She'd lose her mind too if she started down that road.

Bella collapsed her forehead on her knees while the first fingers of rain started tapping a requiem for her heart against the window.

_She wasn't strong enough for this. _

_She couldn't do this._

_She couldn't be an Alpha's mate._

_She only wanted to be Jacob's. Even if he was injured and mad._

_She __**needed **__to see him... to hold him. _

The click and rasp of the door had Bella's head jerking up from drowning in rising hopelessness.

Her father walked in first, wet from the rain, and his eyes immediately found hers. He held the door for Carlisle... and then Edward and _Jasper_.

Bella pulled the blanket tighter around her knees, but she lifted her chin.

"I need to see Jacob." She announced with counterfeit confidence and calm.

Charlie closed the door as he exchanged looks with Carlisle.

"Dad, I _need _to see him," she repeated.

"Baby," her father murmured, coming around the couch. She watched his eyes - they were unreadable. Usually they spoke volumes more than his mouth.

"Jake's not doin' well, Bells."

_She didn't hear that. She didn't._

"No dad, you don't understand... I _need _to see him," she pressed in a voice that had shed all pretenses and shook with desperation.

Charlie pursed his lips and his eyes darted out to the room.

She grabbed his arm as he sat beside her, hissing quietly as if the others couldn't hear. "I'll do _anything_... I'll come back if you want... I'll-.."

"Shh," he soothed, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and pulling her into his side. His scent and warmth made her collapse to his chest with a whimper. Her hands fisted in his damp flannel - the only comfort she had.

Her father's hand stroked over her hair for a moment. "See what he's done to her?" her father's voice rumbled under her ear. "It's like he's messed with her head or somethin'."

Bella's face jerked up, and she threw herself away from him with a frown. Her gaze followed her father's to where Dr. Cullen was seated in the easy chair, both arms stiffly laid on the armrests, and Edward was half-sitting on one side. They looked like some stiff victorian portrait as they watched her with those eerie reptilian eyes. Jasper was nowhere to be seen.

"Bella, you're not well either, child," Carlisle spoke slowly like he expected a psychotic break at any moment. "Jacob is being tended by his Pack, don't worry for him."

Bella blinked, looking to her father and then Carlisle again. "Is h-he okay?" she quavered.

Carlisle tented his fingers before him, resting his elbows on the chair. He glanced up at Edward.

Edward licked his lips as his brow furrowed in a parody of sympathy. "Rosalie just returned," he began quietly, like he was breaking bad news. Because he was.

"They've finally stopped fighting. She followed the scent of blood, but it appears they've dragged him back onto their lands so she couldn't see the extent of his injuries."

"I-injuries?" Bella squeaked.

It was her father who spoke next.

"Bells, baby," he put a hand on her knee and Bella recoiled - from that touch, from the foreboding lacing innocuous words.

"It's what I was worried about," he murmured. "He's lost it this time. _Really_. This isn't some kinda plan of his any more."

Bella's spine stiffened. "What?" the word was clipped from a whisper.

Her father licked his lips and his eyes darted out to the Cullens uncomfortably. "Bella, I had to do it baby," he said carefully. "He's not Jake anymore. And I was worried. Real worried. It's the only way he'd a' let you go - if they thought I was makin' a play for their team."

Bella just stared at him in horror as she scrambled away from him on the couch - as far as she could go. It felt like her blood had turned to ice and frostbite was slowly overtaking her heart.

Her father rubbed his hands on his jeans nervously.

"Bella you're ill, child. Things will look very different when you're well again," Carlisle interjected in patronizing silk.

Bella's head whipped around to see Carlisle in that exact same position. He and Edward were now watching her with identical dollar-store expressions of pity. It was like all vampires had only a handful of the same stock emotions.

"Your father is a wise man and one who loves you," he murmured smoothly. "He did the right thing."

Bella's eyes snapped back to her father as she burst up from the couch, tripping on the afghan as she tried to put as much distance between them as possible. She caught herself on the coffee table.

"What have you done?" Bella breathed, her wide disbelieving eyes locked on her father.

"They know everything, Bells," Charlie said in that crisp emotionless voice he usually reserved for the station. "Now I need you to tell me if you know anything else Jake was plannin'..."

He stood up with placating palms as he took slow steps forward. "I knew this was gonna happen, Bells. That he was gonna snap before he made it through his own game. Jake's not Jake anymore. He really has lost his mind, baby. I'm worried he's gonna come after you. _Hurt _you..."

"No," she mouthed as she shook her head numbly back and forth and backed away from him. "No..."

"The Cullen's are the only ones who can get you outta this mess. Who can protect you. I'm not gonna see my baby girl get chained to some monster who-"

With a shriek, Bella drew back her hand and slapped those traitor words from his mouth. As hard as she could.

The stinging clap echoed in the silence until it was overrun by the staccato rain.

Lightning flickered and flashed over the form of her father, frozen with cheek turned. He drew in a slow breath as he turned back to face her with a bland frown.

"I hate you," Bella hissed, baring her teeth as she stumbled on the blanket out into the middle of the room.

"Bella," she whipped around to find Carlisle in the same freaking position. But as if he'd heard that thought, his hands slowly lowered to the armrests and he pushed himself fluidly from the chair. "You only _think _you love him, child. It's like a drug. It's not his fault - it's just a spell that comes with that curse-..."

"**HE'S MY BEST FRIEND!"** She felt like her chunks of her heart were expelled along with her hoarse scream.

With that, she turned and sprinted toward the stairs.

"Bella, let us help you," Carlisle's voice slithered after her like a viper.

She fell on the steps, with a clattering thump, and then scrambled up them on hands and feet. Tripping and careening into the wall, she made her way down the hall to her room and threw herself on the bed face-down.

And she sobbed.

Her father had betrayed her. He'd betrayed _them_.

_Her father! _

Bella couldn't do this. She just _couldn't_.

Not when Jacob was somewhere crazy... injured... _bleeding!_

...

That thought made all her tumbling despair skid to a complete stop.

_Jacob was somewhere crazy, injured, bleeding._

And here she was blubbering like a freaking-... like a _fucking _baby.

With an about-face that felt psychotic, Bella wiped her snotty face on the mattress and sat up. Her breath was still hitching as she rubbed her hands briskly over her swollen face, but, even still, a steely resolve was stiffening her spine.

Sniffling impatiently she let her hands fall to her lap. Immediately her eyes darted to the picture on the nightstand. She leaned over and picked it up into tender hands.

_Jake n' Bells, laughing their freaking heads off._

He looked so happy.

_She _looked so happy.

Life was cruel.

But she wasn't going to let it stop her. She was his best friend, his imprint, his mate. She was going to find him and get him away from this insanity - get him _far away_. They could just leave all this crap behind and find some quiet place _somewhere _where they could live out their days. A little wooden house maybe? A simple life? She didn't care if he was bonkers, she'd sit beside him until he came back.

If he never did, she'd be happy just to hold him.

And if his Pack had turned on their Alpha then she was alone in her crusade. So she'd better start getting herself _to-freaking-gether_.

She placed the picture on the side table with a resolute little click and smoothed her hair messy matted hair back from her face. They'd put polyurethane over her window and the rain was hitting it in a squirrely percussion but under that, she heard indistinct murmurs coming from downstairs.

Wiping her fist under her nose a final time she stood and soundlessly crept on bare feet to the hall. She could just make out the hushed rushing words from the living room. She lowered herself down the wall beside her bedroom door and pulled her knees to her chest and listened.

"It ain't a ruse - she ain't lyin'," Jasper's drawl surprised her - where had he been? "She's _powerful _troubled an' I don't think she's gotta inklin' 'bout what they' been plannin'. But I can tell y'all this, she's _crazy _for that boy. Fact is, I ain't _never _felt a love like that."

"That's because it's _unnatural_, Jasper,: Edward's voice was icy and biting. "Manufactured by the basest sort of magic to assure the proliferation of their gene. Poor Bella's nothing but a brainwashed victim."

She heard Charlie huff out a sigh. "So how can I get her back?"

There was silence for a moment that was filled by a pulsing curtain of rain against the plastic over her window.

"Well, of course the spell would be broken if the boy dies..." Carlisle's voice as as delicate as one could be insinuating the death of a person's best friend's son.

Her father's plodding footsteps paced across the floor. Charlie lowered his voice. "Why didn't you all just get it over with tonight?"

Bella clapped a hand over her mouth.

Maybe she'd _heard wrong_? _Surely_...

Except that her ears would never _think _of betraying her with such horrible words. Tears started anew and ran silently down her cheeks while the rain outside spattered in sympathy.

"The wolves should take care of their own," Carlisle crooned, lowering his voice as well. "And we'd never want Bella to think us such monsters."

"Yeah, well that don't get us anywhere huh?" Charlie grumbled as he continued pacing the floor. "What about this other one. The one your boy saved her from? Is he gonna do it?"

Bella could _feel _Edward's gloating smile like the flash of lightning that flickered through her room.

"Well that's what we were hoping to see played out," Carlisle sighed. "Why we haven't put an end to it ourselves - of course even we underestimated him. It is fortunate Edward was there.

"Got that right," Charlie's words were pushed through clenched teeth.

"And it still may... or the wolves will have to do what they must. Perhaps we can help to that effect."

" 'He still gonna come after her?"

"Who, Jacob?" Edward's voice cut in.

"Well yeah," her father agreed, pausing in his pacing. "But that other one …"

"We won't let him get near her again, Charlie." She could hear that repulsive fake smile in his voice.

" 'Preciate that, Carlisle," Charlie said as the hollow thud of his footsteps started again. "But I don't want nothin' like tonight to happen again neither. Maybe we'd better meet with Billy tomorrow and let him know."

"Y'mean today?" Jasper's chuckle bounced upstairs.

"Yeah, 'guess so," he agreed wryly. "Whattaya think? Can you come along too? Let 'em know he'd better keep his boy in line otherwise..."

"Alice and I will stay with Bella," Edward offered helpfully.

She heard her father's thoughtful grunt. "I was thinkin' she'd be safest at school... y'know, someplace public. As long as you're there, a'course," he added quickly. "You an' Alice at least."

"We'll take Jasper and Emmett," Carlisle cut in. "And Esme. Never underestimate the power of a woman to keep things civil."

All three of them chuckled together in that dorky male-bonding way men did. Bella rolled her eyes as she peeled her hand from her mouth. But at this new turn, tentative rays of hope started to filter through her despair - it was her best chance of escape!

Bella quickly stood up from the hallway and crept back into her room. If Jasper were some kind of feeling-reader (like it sounded) then she didn't want him picking up on it. Bella quickly distracted herself with picking up pieces of her window along with branches and leaves that had blown in.

Another crack of thunder rent the night and Bella wandered idly to the window as the rain clambered against the plastic. She dragged her hand over the sill that had been gouged into splinters by the wolf's scrabbling claws. Good thing it had been open and the glass had been thrown to either side, otherwise she'd have bled out from crawling like a madwoman to mindlessly throw herself out after him. They were right, actually: she _was _crazy for him, she _was _brainwashed.

And by the most powerful magic on the planet: love.

As a science geek, she could appreciate the evolutionary aspects any kind of love, but it didn't change the fact that it was magic. And just maybe biology had formed around _it_ instead of the other way around.

Because even without Billy's legends (which both of them ignored - it was just too much right now) she knew Jacob was a part of her and she of him. It had been that way since they were kids - no woo-woo magic required.

Because - like it had always been - their relationship was about balance and comfort and sharing and friendship.

And, _no matter what,_ Bella was going to find him and give him just that.

Love.

'

'

Bella sat smooshed up against the cruiser door (that Paul had actually gotten repaired) as far away from her father as she could as the windshield wipers sloshed rain back and forth over the windshield. The storm had rolled over forks as the sun came up, but, not surprisingly, the rain was going to hang around for a few days. She actually didn't mind. It matched her mood and she was pretty sure it would help hide her scent (when she made a run for it).

It was kind of ironic, but Charlie was taking her exactly where she was supposed to be according to the now defunct plan. He'd left before Billy and Jake had gotten to that part of it, of course - otherwise he wouldn't be taking her there now.

"At school on Monday" was almost the extent of the things she knew. From here she was supposed to tell Angela that she was running away with Jacob and not only tell her where, but ask for her help at third period. Because Angela had both first and second periods with Edward and would be broadcasting that information loud and clear.

"I know you hate me for this, Bells," Charlie's voice suddenly spoke the obvious into the thick silence between them.

Bella's nostrils flared as she turned to him with hard eyes. "Oh, I don't hate you, Charlie," she bit out.

He glanced at her with a raised brow.

"There aren't even _words _for how I feel about you right now," she hissed.

Her father's eyes returned stoically to the road as his mustache crouched over his frown.

Bella turned to look out the passenger window as a passing car on the other side made a soft swish over the percussion of the windshield wipers and rain.

"I love you, baby," he murmured. "You gotta trust I'm doin' what's best for you."

"What's best for _me_?" she nearly shrieked as she whipped around. "Best for _me_? Betraying your daughter... your best friend... people we've known all our lives?! How can you even _delude _yourself into thinking that?"

"Bella things are real dangerous right now-..."

"I _know that!"_ she spat, slapping the seat as her blood pressure skyrocketed. "I _knew that_ when I accepted all this! When I accepted _him!_ _I **love him**_, da- _Charlie!_ **_Love..._** do you even _know_ what that means? I'd **_die _**for him! _Happily!"_

Charlie glanced at her several times and then shoved his hand through his hair. He pulled the police car up to a stop light and his gaze fell to his lap while his lips rolled under his mustache.

"And you know what?" she hissed, drawing his eyes back up. "I'd also rather die than _betray_ him."

They stared at each other silently for several seconds - a newly reconciled father and daughter now torn even farther apart.

A honk of a car horn behind them had her father scowling into the rearview mirror and then pulling through the intersection at the changed light.

"You'd better pull your hair down over that-..." he bit the words out under his breath. "Over-... what the hell was he doin'? _Chewin' _on your neck like a goddamn-...?" He shook his head with a huff.

At least he didn't say it... _animal_.

A blush rushed to her cheeks as Bella promptly turned her back on her father and stared out the passenger window. She didn't even freaking care anymore (though she subtly pulled her jacket collar up anyway).

At least the huge purple bruise was on the side, kind of where her neck met her shoulder so it was possible to hide (it _was_ pretty impressive). She and Jacob had spent all Saturday night until sun-up exploring each other's bodies and making love until Bella was simply too sore. And during every round, Jacob's mouth had found its way to that same spot for some reason that neither of them talked about (Bella had heard Old Quil and put two and two together that it had something to do with that subject they'd silently agreed was off-limits right now. She assumed Jake had too). But Bella wasn't complaining - it had felt awesome.

All too soon they were pulling into the school parking lot and once again adrenaline charged through her veins (she didn't know how she had any left). Her father wordlessly pulled up to the curb and put the car in park with a metallic groan.

Bella pulled up her backpack from the footwell and started to open the door.

"Hey," her father called.

He'd effectively locked her in so she had to turn around and face him. She did so with flat, icy eyes.

Charlie pretended to be unfazed. "So I gotta run into the station and then I got a meetin'."

"With Billy and the Cullens, I know," she snapped.

It was the first genuine expression on his face and it was complex: surprise mixed with understanding and … deep regret.

"You heard all that?" he whispered.

Bella didn't answer, but just bit her lip and flicked it with her tongue.

Charlie cleared his throat uncomfortably. "So I oughta be done 'round noon," he continued. "I'll pick you up when I'm done."

Her nostrils flared and she flicked her lip harder.

"I don't gotta tell you to stay near the Cullens," he murmured.

Bella snorted loudly.

Her father ignored it as he panned the parking lot. "We're a little early, I don't see their car yet, maybe I should-..."

"Open the door, Charlie," Bella pretty much commanded as she turned her back on him. "They'll be here in 10 minutes - just like always." The Cullens always arrived at the exact same time - just so the entire school could watch them parade up from their fancy cars.

She stared at the door for a moment with nothing happening, but just before she turned back around the lock jumped open. Without a backward glance Bella pulled up the hood of her macintosh jacket and pushed out of the car.

"Love you," her father called.

Bella slammed the door.

It was raining.

Bella didn't care. Tucking her head she held her backpack to her chest as she trudged up the walkway toward school. Students were flooding around her, chattering away in their perfect little normal teenaged worlds. It made her sick - somewhere out in the woods, Jacob was lost and alone and-...

She couldn't say what made her turn and look up - instinct? It had to be.

Her eyes snapped to the woods behind the school to see a tall, bare-chested man staring at her from under the ebony hair plastered over his his forehead in the rain.

"Embry," she gasped.

Her head whipped around to the parking lot to see her father's car still waiting at the sidewalk.

_Damn._

"Wait," she whispered - she knew he could hear.

Hunching up her shoulders, she pretended to walk up to the school with the few students who actually came early. She went right on into the usual side door and then jumped to the side and looked out the window. _Finally _- her father pulled away from curb, easing through the parking lot.

As soon as he had turned the corner onto the road, Bella burst out the door and sprinted over the sopping grass. Water was squishing in her chucks by the time she reached the woods and Embry's agonized face.

"Embry!" Bella gasped, squeezing her backpack against her rising panic - she'd never seen him so openly upset.

"Hey, sweetheart," he made a valiant attempt at normalcy, but his hoarse tight voice couldn't hide his distress. Glancing down at the parking lot, he wrapped a long arm around her shoulders and guided her farther into the woods. "You okay?"

"How's Jake?" she croaked.

He didn't answer but just kept urging her along. Bella pulled up short, jerking out from under his arm.

"How's Jake?!" she nearly screamed.

The wolf's gaze darted nervously down toward the school and then met hers as he took a slow steeling breath.

"Not good, Bella." The words were quiet, grim.

Bella's heart stopped. "How?" she rasped.

Wiping his dripping hair back from his face, Embry squeezed his eyes shut and then shoved his hands into his cutoffs' pockets.

"He lost it," he breathed, he opened ebony eyes shining with sadness.

Bella was biting her lip so hard she drew blood, trying to keep a deluge of sobs from springing free.

"_Really_?" she choked. "This isn't some kinda tactic or strat-..."

Embry's brisk shake of his head sent water drops flying. "He jus-... the wolf-..."

He flipped his hair out of his eyes and squinted at her, his usual reticent nature stumbling over words.

But Bella's eyes _begged_... they _pleaded_.

"Sam and Paul had to take him down, Bella," he whispered. "I think Leah helped too. He's still alive but they hurt him. Bad I think - they won't let anyone see. But the Pack can't hear him anymore."

Bella squeezed her eyes closed as she crumpled to the ground, hugging her backpack tightly to her chest. A single sob escaped as water leached through her jeans.

Embry squatted down in front of her reaching out to rub her silently jerking shoulders. He rested his forehead against hers and the satiated lupine need for touch sent a melting warmth through her body.

It wasn't nearly enough.

For several minutes, she stayed there, quietly weeping, her hitching cries drawing in Embry's steaming breath and echoing in the quiet wood. Rain drizzled over the canopy of leaves over their heads, siphoning through to fall in fat plopping drops on the forest floor.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," he whispered. "Everyone's scared. They've turned their backs. I'm the last one who's-... "

Bella looked up and he pulled away a few inches, his face tortured.

Her eyes darted frantically between his. "I need to see him," she rasped. "I need to find him and get him outta here."

His brow crumpled and something about his expression made Bella blink to attention.

"What." The word snapped over her tongue.

His eyes swept the ground for a moment as he licked his lips.

"What?!" Bella jerked away, shooting to her feet.

"W-when I was running this morning, he talked to me." the wolf squinted up at her with worried eyes. "He asked me to come. He wants you to meet him but I jus-... I don't think its safe."

"Embry!" she very nearly shrieked, letting her backpack fall to the leaves.

He straightened slowly, shoving his hands back in his pockets uncomfortably. "He sounded _bad _Bella- real weak and bad. He's not in his right head and he can't protect you Bella - not right now. And he'd have wanted me to keep you safe - even from him."

"I don't freaking care!" she cried, staring at him while tears filled her eyes and her mind tried to wrap itself around all this. She realized she'd been holding onto the hope that this was all just some kind of game, but seeing Embry like this-..

Sniffling, she turned over her shoulder, scanning the parking lot; the Cullens would be here any second. She whipped back around.

"Where is he?" she demanded quietly.

Embry sucked in a breath as he shook his head. "He wanted me to come pick you up at 10:30 to meet him."

"Where?" she murmured.

He brushed his sopping hair away again as a tentative shoulder bobbed up. "He said you'd remember."

Bella froze, blinking at him.

Suddenly Embry's eyes darted over her head.

"They're here," he hissed, the instant hate twisting the words was shocking coming from that tender mouth.

Bella didn't have to ask. "Go!" she shrilled in a whisper. "Bring my truck - wear a shirt and a hat or something." (As if that could disguise them with her truck sticking out like sore thumb... but it was all they had).

He nodded briskly as he jogged backward a few steps.

"Go!" Bella rasped.

Turning around he sprinted into the forest.

Bella watched him disappear and then leaned down to pick up her backpack.

An alabaster hand beat her to it.

"He didn't hurt you?" Edward was anxiously peering into her eyes as he slung the wet bag over his shoulder.

Bella expelled a frustrated sigh and shook her head as she turned resignedly back toward school, not even bothering to check that he followed (of course he did).

"What did he want?" he asked quietly.

Bella stopped walking and her face jerked up to pointedly study him. It looked like genuine anxiety in those eerie eyes (or as genuine as it got). It was either because he hadn't heard (or read Embry's mind) or because he had.

She couldn't tell.

But in her unhurried assessment, her eyes snapped down to Edward's lips which had suddenly curved. Blinking, she met eyes that looked _sappy_. A cold white hand came up to carefully wipe droplets of rain from her brow. She was too shocked to move.

It was so _odd_: he didn't even understand how much she hated him.

His thin lips were softened to sentimental while he traced her cheek with a marble fingertip as if she were actually enjoying his touch. He only saw what he wanted to see.

Bella took a pointed step back. "He wanted to tell me that Jacob was taken down by his Pack," she said flatly, ironing out her hate and horror in a monotone.

The vampire blinked, suddenly understanding that she just might NOT been basking in his attention like he'd assumed.

"I'm so sorry, darling," Edward murmured with that fake furrowed brow.

She wanted to scream that he was a big fat liar, but instead she just turned on her heel toward the school. And started walking.

"I'm also sorry to keep you waiting," he continued - sounding a heck of a lot closer to sorry this time as a hand came to rest possessively at the small of her back. "How about we take you from now on?"

Bella wasn't listening.

_Remember. _

He'd told Embry she'd remember.

Was it a message? Was all this somehow - in some crazy freaking way - a part of his plan?

She had to decide - and quickly.

She didn't know if Edward had heard or not, but either way she wouldn't make it out of school if he wasn't otherwise occupied. She still needed to go with the original strategy, but she could tell Angela that she was running to a location in the opposite direction and hope that gave them a headstart.

Bella stopped walking.

"Darling?" Edward's voice was like a mosquito in her ear.

She trusted Jacob. She'd _told _him she trusted him.

Yet her mind kept screaming that she'd _witnessed _his demise with her own eyes and heart and she needed to protect him however she could. Even _Embry _thought he'd lost it (and he couldn't lie to save his life).

'_No matter how bad it gets, Bells... remember.'_

But Bella had taken an oath. When she took this man into her heart and soul, into her _body_, she'd made a promise to stand by his side and have faith in love.

Jacob had _asked _her to trust him.

She did.

And she'd rather die than betray him.

Bella looked up to see a familiar figure running up the walk through the rain.

"Angela!"

'

'

"Can we get a restroom pass?"

Mr. Swanson looked up with bland eyes. "You two girls need the moral support?"

Bella bit her lip and glanced at Angela who gave him the perfect doe eyes from behind her glasses. "It's girl's stuff."

Bella went in for the kill. "Angela's gotta open her locker. She has some extra tamp-.."

"Okay, ladies," Swanson's gaze hit the desk as he scribbled out hall passes while they exchanged triumphant smirks.

Angela looped her arm through Bela's as they bustled out of history class brandishing their prizes. But Bella's heart was going a million miles per hour - Edward was usually in that class _with _them (which had been the test in the original scenario).

He hadn't been.

"Are you sure about this?" Angela whispered, squeezing her arm as they rushed down the hall. 10:23.

"Yeah," Bella breathed. "Surer than anything in my life."

Angela gave her a beautiful silky smile and pushed her glasses up her nose. "It's so romantic."

And it wasn't just some gooey comment either - she was truly supportive of Bella's heart, even if this looked crazy on the outside (for the record, it was). In this short time, she was already a true friend - a rarity to be sure.

They stopped at Bella's locker and Angela opened hers too.

"Hey, did you see Edward earlier?" Bella asked quietly as her nervous fingers fumbled the combination. She spun the dial around three times and tried again.

"He was in first period, but not second," she frowned, shutting her locker with a clang. "He must have left. Alice wasn't in art history either."

Bella nodded absently and finally yanked her padlock down. She pulled out her backpack and spun around.

Angela was holding out a piece of paper. "I wanted to send you off with _something_, so I drew it this morning," Angela wrinkled her nose.

It was one of her cool anime drawings: Bella hugging with loving abandon someone who actually looked a lot like Jacob (she'd described him before). Somehow in the simple sketch she'd managed to capture their hearts. Above them were the words: Always be True.

"Wow," Bella breathed. "It's perfect." (And it truly was: Bella couldn't help the sick satisfaction she got knowing Edward must've had to watching this drawing take shape in her mind.)

Bella pulled her into a fierce hug. "Thanks."

Angela pushed her glasses up her nose and smiled. "Want me to walk you out?"

Bella nodded as she slung her (still soaking) backpack over her shoulder and they started jogging down the hall, sneakers squeaking on the linoleum. They were just turning the last corner to the exit, when Bella stopped short with a squeak.

Angela ran into her making them both stumble.

"Rosalie," Bella gasped.

The pin-up blond gave her a knowing smirk. "I'm pretty sure those hall passes don't go _this far_ down the hall."

"_Please_," Bella whispered. "I just have to um... go.." (Bella sucked at lying as bad as Embry.)

"Oh save it," she snorted, and plucked the drawing from Bella's hand.

She rolled her eyes and handed it emphatically back. "Sickening."

"I don't see how this is any of your business, Rosalie," Angela stepped defensively to Bella's side with a frown.

"You know what?" Rosalie put her hands on her hips. "You're right. I'm sick of watching my brother moon over some scrawny, plain human girl. Get yourself killed - see if I care," she gave Bella a scathing once-over. "It'll be an improvement." Nose in the air, she pushed between the two of them.

Bella didn't wait, releasing a sigh of relief, she jogged down the few stairs to the door.

"What did she mean... killed," Angela whispered worriedly as she followed.

Bella glanced over her shoulder and wrinkled her nose. "Last I checked, ditching school wasn't grounds for Capital Punishment." (She sucked at lying, but she could deflect with dorky humor.)

Angela giggled, and Bella was glad. She didn't want her gentle heart to be exposed to all the frighting crap that was a part of her world now. These few hours at school had confirmed something: she no longer belonged here.

"Is that _him_?" Angela's awed whisper snapped Bella's head back into the game and her pulse sprinted zero to 60 in a second flat. She'd been so relieved that Rosalie hadn't been a problem, that she'd forgotten that the real problems hadn't even begun.

Bella looked up to see Embry leaning against her truck with his hands stuck in the pockets of a Seahawks hoodie.

"No that's his friend, Embry," Bella whispered, her eyes locked with his as they hurried down the walk. They were bloodshot and worried and suddenly she realized just how much she'd allowed the normalcy of school to lull her into the illusion that everything was somehow okay.

It was wasn't even close.

Embry pushed off the car and Bella walked straight into his open arms. He squeezed her tight as he drew in a long breath of her scent. "Ready, sweetheart?"

Bella nodded against his chest - he smelled like Pack and comfort. She let out a long sigh as suddenly she realized that things really _were_ okay. She was exactly where she needed to be. If she got killed (she wouldn't allow herself to think about any other possibilities) she'd do it being true to her heart and among her Pack.

Honestly she couldn't think of a better way to go.

She squeezed Embry tight and then stepped back and looked into soft eyes. There was a little smile on his lips - she made him feel better too.

Embry cut his eyes over at the truck. "It's not exactly stealth," he smirked.

"We'll just make do," she replied simply.

As Embry opened the door and stepped up on the curb, Jacob's scent billowed over her like a caress. _He'd driven _this truck and now she could clearly smell it. Warm and earthy and sweet - it smelled like home. Bella let her eyes flutter closed.

And then jerked them back open. "Oh, this is Angela," Bella smiled, looking back at her friend. "Angela, Embry."

With a grin between the two, she pushed her backpack across the seat, carefully placed the drawing on the dash, and started to climb up.

_They had to move it. They were already several minutes late._

But something made her glance over her shoulder... and then do a double-take.

Embry was frozen stock still and staring at Angela with stunned widened eyes.

"Emb?" Bella whispered, stepping back down.

Her gaze darted to Angela who was similarly ensnared in wonder, even as a blush rushed under her olive skin.

And it was the perfect proof that imprinting was actually about heart: she couldn't think of someone more perfect for Emb (and she was pretty protective). But it also made her sad - Embry had been patiently waiting for this to happen (as the only one of them tender enough to appreciate imprinting before it had happened to him). Now it had, and Bella didn't know if either of them would even survive this thing - especially with their sanity intact.

Life could be cruel.

"Emb," Bella whispered, tugging on his arm. "Honey we gotta go."

It was like yanking on a stone statue.

"Emb! We gotta go!" she tried again more urgently.

That at least awoke _Angela_ from their thrall. She blinked and met Bella's eyes with heated embarrassment as she pushed up her glasses.

That in turn snapped Embry out of it a little. His eyes dipped as his hand came up to brush his hair back in that habitually endearing way.

"Um... I-..." he began.

"Sorry, I-.." she laughed breathily.

They both stammered uncomfortably at the same exact time and then laughed -it was pretty freaking adorable. And unfair.

They were in the middle of a war.

"Honey, Jake's waiting," Bella hissed, now pretty much putting her entire body weight into tugging on his arm.

Finally he moved and Bella nearly toppled over. Embry blithely caught her - his eyes never leaving his imprint. Bella got her footing and moved around his front, pushing against his solid abs while he just stared over her head.

"C'mon, Emb," she shoved him around the truck. "Can I give him your number, Ange?" Bella called over her shoulder.

Angela nodded, her gaze falling as she pushed her hair behind her ear nervously.

Bella opened the driver's side and nearly stuffed the huge wolf inside. She closed the door on him noting the keys in the steering column and hoping to heck he could drive. She didn't think she could right now.

Bella went around the front of the truck and pulled Angela into her arms, even though her eyes stayed plastered on Embry.

Pulling back, Bella smothered her smile at the girl's look of awe as she tenderly pushed her hair behind her friend's ear. She took Angela's hands in hers and finally she pried her eyes away.

"Wow," she said breathlessly.

"I think he likes you too." Bella swung their clasped hands between them.

"Really?" Angela bit her lip and blinked at her from behind her glasses, showcasing just how incredibly dazed she was.

" 'Sure of it. You guys can hang out soon," she smiled gently. _ She hoped._

Releasing her, Bella took a step back, rubbing her hands on her wet jacket and then turned her back on those starry eyes. She climbed into the cab with their matching set trained outside the passenger door and yanked it closed.

"Emb, we gotta go," she whispered tensely. "It isn't _safe _for her to be around us right now."

_That _instantly snapped Embry's gaze to hers.

"_James, Jacob,"_ she mouthed, her brow furrowing with sorrow at the pain in his eyes.

Embry nodded wordlessly as he turned the key in the ignition.

"We're supposed to meet him at the old Hanson house," Bella provided quietly.

Again he nodded as the engine turned over with a roar.

With a sigh, Bella turned and placed her palm against the passenger window in response to Angela's raised hand. Embry pulled out, now myopically focused on leaving... and keeping Angela safe.

Embry gunned the truck out onto the road with the squeal of tires and readjusted his hands on the wheel. Bella settled back against the seat as they sped toward a psycho vampire, a conniving coven, a broken Alpha and quite possibly their deaths.

Licking his lips, Embry kept his eyes on the road but his whispered plea harkened back to Bella's own, just days ago when this whole thing had begun:

_"Tell me everything."_

'

* * *

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Review if you like.

'

'

You know how I love images. Angela's drawing is inspired by xcgirl08's here if you're interested: xcgirl08**DOT**deviantart**DOT**com/art/Near-to-You-75703977


	21. Play

Thanks to Tayjayfan for reading over this transition chap.

The lyrics are from a perfectly unusual song from the same artist who does an all-time fave: _Be Like Water._

"Afraid" by Sarah Fimm - youtube**DOT**com/watch?v=02PoYkaCvIM

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_Thanks for reading and hope you enjoy._

'

* * *

'

I'd like to hold you close

Make you feel safe

Not so afraid of yourself

'

If we have to part, so it shall be

'

I'd like to help you suffer less

Not be so locked up in your thoughts

Afraid of love and all under the sun

'

I'll hide out in your space

Emptiness on my face

I'll be keeping you safe

When you're cold and alone

Til you come out and play

'

**21 Play**

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head hanging

'

muscles jumping

'

fire

'

burning

'

he was burning alive

'

The white-hot rage that consumed his soul made Jacob's entire being boil and simmer under the surface of sanity, loosening it from the mooring quick.

He drew in a deep shaking breath from where he was hunched over in the leaves hoping it would help cool that inferno.

It did nothing but fan the flames.

"You doin' okay, Chief?"

The sound of a human voice was shocking to his system, like being thrown an ice-cube in hell. He turned the trinket remembrance over in his mind before it evaporated completely. It was enough though.

It was always just enough.

Jacob burst to his feet, branding his eyes with his fists for a moment before he let his hands fall to his sides. He rolled his shoulders reminding himself he was in a man's body. Over the last 26 hours and 43 minutes it had been so frighteningly easy to forget he was human.

His burning eyes blinked soundly and then snapped to the two wolves with an intensity that cracked like a whip, making them cower with the sting.

Paul and Leah had scrambled back from his movement. Now their gazes burrowed into the ground while their muscles strained against the instinct to turn tail and flee. They were scared of him - as they should be. They understood now: they'd had a glimpse of just how he burned inside.

Fuck, he'd probably be scared of himself too if he'd taken a moment to think about it. But that would entail using a moment he didn't have. If he allowed so much as a millisecond of inattention, he could lose control...

of this rage,

of this fire,

of this gut-wrenching _need _to rip out the throats of anyone between him and having her safe in his arms.

A low growl percolated under his diaphragm and Jacob lunged for that 200 year old oak (again). He threw a punch into the bloody, bashed-in indentation that he'd made over the last hour when his sanity was popping at the inseams with the effort it took to prevent this rage from exploding like a Napalm bomb...

Into the Pack mind.

Over his two wolves, standing at obeisant ready.

Through the bonds to his mate that he'd left hanging flaccid in his fear.

He slammed his other fist into the tree, putting his weight into it and listening to the satisfying crunch of shattering knuckles. And again... over and over. He pummeled the huge tree so fucking hard that it groaned and branches fell to the ground.

He relished the pain - it kept him in his skin.

_It was just too much._

too much for the wolf to allow his imprint within a million miles of a leech's stone cold hands.

too much for the Alpha not to have his mate in his arms and under his protection.

too much for the man to know his best friend was frightened and alone.

But then Jacob had known that.

And like he did with his Pack, he'd played his own weakness as a strength. He'd prepped Sam and Paul that he'd probably lose it at some point and if (when) that happened, gave them permission (and an order) to try and bring him down.

Of course they _couldn't _really, but he figured their attempts combined with his protective Alpha instinct (that covered his Pack), would be just enough of a distraction to allow Jacob to rein in the beast.

He'd hoped.

What he _hadn't _counted on, however, was that the cocksucking parasite would _sneak into her goddamn room._

The Cullen's had tolerated the fact that he'd had to pace the ridge a behind her house - a mile and a minute away from his mate (there was simply no way he could have endured it otherwise). Oh, they taunted him mercilessly of course, probably hoping to whip him into a frenzy so something just like last night would happen. When Bella had awoken - running vulnerable and open - to see that motherfucker sitting in her rocking chair, it had happened alright.

Understandably, Jacob had lost it. Completely.

Jacob ground his snarl through his bared teeth as he slammed his fists into the tree with increasing fervor.

_He was going to rip off that bloodsucker's balls and shove them down it's throat before he shredded the rest of it and watched it burn._

Fresh blood spattered over the battered bark and the bones cracked and crackled up his arms. He pulverized his knuckles as he tried to beat his rage (and himself) into submission. With a final growling punch, Jacob collapsed against the tree. Bracing his forearm against the splintered trunk, he leaned his head against the wood while his breath heaved in deep whooping gasps.

But _Bella_ had saved him from himself.

Once again.

He'd been trying to protect her from his rage, but she'd flayed herself open like a sacrifice on the altar of his madness and the darkness that infected his soul had fed from her bleeding heart. He'd siphoned off her love to quench that fire in contemptible ravenous gulps until she was left with nothing but despair.

Bella would brave the fires of hell to bring him back - and she had, in point of fact. That she loved him no matter how bad he fucked up or lost it to the wild? That the wolf in him had an imprint, the leader had a mate and the man had a best friend to stand at his side? It was a truth that was slowly blossoming into an entirely different kind of self-dominion.

She gave him strength. She gave him balance.

Just enough, in fact, for Jacob to wrestle control from such terrifying rage that under any other circumstances would have laid waste to it all, sanity included. She didn't know it, but shamefully she had saved Sam and Paul from serious injury... or worse.

But they did.

With a grunt, Jacob socked the tree a final time and then pushed off the oak. Letting his head fall back, he drank in cool air from the drizzling sky as he shook blood off his hands and listened to it spatter to the leaves with the rain. He had just enough time for the bones to re-knit again. He had calculated it, of course. Everything he did now was

Especially until this demon was turned into purple ash (both of them).

With a low groaning exhale, Jacob cracked his neck and then tipped his face back down and studied his two wolves. Paul was wilted and barely holding himself up by a sapling while he panted like a racehorse. Leah was gasping on hands and knees in the leaves. Jacob was able to psychically spare both the Pack and Bella from the fallout, but being in such close physical proximity to the scent of violence along with the sheer igneous energy of his rage took it's toll on his two wolves.

"Paul, Lee, you okay?" Jacob didn't even recognize his own voice - it was gruff and gritty, more vibration than sound.

In unison they both looked up with strained bloodshot eyes. Dutifully nodding, they staggered to their feet.

Jacob was pleased.

Even though every single one of them was worn down to the bone, his team hadn't disappointed. He'd had faith in them and - as Bella had taught him - that was three fourths of the game. With very little time for prepping (but a scheme that worked his Pack's organic weaknesses and strengths) Sam, Paul and Leah had helped him carefully orchestrate his own demise.

The best way to lead was to give free rein to the right player at the right time. Wolves needed a certain level of dominance and containment to stay in control, but whenever possible, Jacob let each of them do what each of them did best. It was all a game of _manipulation_, not micromanagement: put the right skills and personality into the right job and things would work like a well oiled machine. Even though Embry, Jared and Quil didn't know they were in play by necessity, they had performed perfectly to the tune of their natures and heart with just the subtlest of subconscious pushes from their Alpha.

He'd used the same strategy with Charlie: given him the basic pieces and let him make the moves he saw fit. And the man had either done a fucking brilliant job of playing an impossible game, or he'd unequivocally betrayed them all.

Jacob could work with it either way

Through it all, he'd wanted to reach out to Bella so badly, but - in addition to needing her emotions authentic (especially with that blond leech that read feelings) - truthfully he was worried about his control. He didn't want to risk subjecting her again to his living hell. And feeling how distraught she was and what she was enduring? He'd never make it through this ordeal with his sanity intact.

Except for the monitoring of his Pack and necessary message to Embry, he kept the vault door locked and bolted - nothing in, nothing out - while inside his rage consumed him.

Jacob had just one more piece to settle into place before the moment of truth - the moment when that truck came over the hill... or didn't. The moment he found out whether Charlie had betrayed them, whether Embry had put loyalty over fear.

And whether Bella had remembered.

"They'll be coming down Route 4 in about 15, Paul," he spoke crisply, surely. He never allowed even a spore of doubt to infect edicts to his wolves. Fear grew like a fungus and it was his job to give them strength. "Run to the intersection and wait to guide them back."

They were in the woods down a gravel access road that was just far enough off the path Embry and Bella would be taking to the old Hanson house. If they were coming.

_Fucking faith, Black._

Just like he'd asked of her in this crazy thing, he needed to have faith (but if things had broken down he still had to have a plan B, C and D. All of them were messy).

Paul nodded brusquely and immediately his hands came to his shorts. Leah started to jog back into the brush to change out of her sundress, but he stopped her with a look.

"I need to talk to you, Lee," he said simply.

He watched her eyes subtly widen before she jerked her chin in assent.

Paul and she exchanged a brief glance (that spoke volumes: he was reassuring her, she was telling him she was worried but okay). And again Jacob was pleased.

In such a short time, Leah had truly begun letting herself integrate into her Pack. The Alpha in him had had to break down her walls with a wrecking ball when the man would have used a toothpick over time, but he needed her focused and ready in this war. So far she'd done an excellent job as a part of the inner circle of this plot. The faith he'd placed in her had done miracles to straighten that spine.

Paul turned around and shucked his shorts off, diving fluidly into the phase. Leah blinked from the sight of his flashing ass and met Jacob's eyes with a shaky brado that valiantly tried to cover her nerves.

"I guess there's a few fringe benefits to this thing," she smirked, rubbing her hands on her dress as she stepped back to lean against the tree.

Jacob didn't miss the part about stepping back.

He decided to help put her at ease; he'd have to make this next play faster than he'd have liked too.

"I'm pretty sure you just gotta be a girl to get Paul to pull down his pants," he gave her a wry smile and then turned his back, pacing a few steps in the soggy leaves.

Jacob gave her time to get her bearings while he centered himself too. Bella had already done the work for him with that astute insight and observant mind, but to say he was distracted right now was the understatement of the century. As always, he was watching his entire Pack in the recesses of his mind while he was reviewing his contingency plans for this war and struggling with the lid on the Pandora's box of his rage. All on top of being sick with worry for his mate. It was a shitty fucking time for this delicate play.

But he simply couldn't wait any longer

Jacob spun on his heel and surveyed the female wolf before him while he rubbed his swollen hand up a forearm that was throbbing deliciously with healing pain. It would help keep him focused. He dove in with no preamble:

"Why Sam, Lee?" he asked quietly.

The question caught her completely off guard - which was the point - and Leah's eyes nearly bugged out of her head as she pushed off the tree.

Jacob waited, keeping his face completely neutral as his palm rubbed slowly up and down his arm. As Alpha he was privy to the innermost thoughts of his Pack (and kept them safely under lock and key unless he needed them). But right now he did: he needed to know if she'd processed this. It would affect his plans.

Leah swallowed audibly as she folded her arms over her vulnerability, hands going to each elbow and rubbing nervously.

Jacob cocked his head as he took a step toward her, his gaze cataloging each micro expression of her face.

_Good: she had realized it, but hadn't quite parsed it out._

"Hmm, Lee?" Jacob crooned with the intensity of a predator - which he was afterall. "I always wondered why a girl like you would get engaged in _high school_."

Jacob continued prowling toward her as her wide eyes darted up and got trapped in his. "And to Sam?... you guys..." he sniffed a quiet laugh with a little shake of his head.

There were many ways to be dominant, but some of those ways clashed more than others. Sam and Leah were both dominants, and - make no mistake - they clashed. (When they were lovers, that is; as friends it was a different story.)

Her eyes darted off to the side from the burn of holding his gaze. Jacob stopped about a foot away from her, watching that gazelle-breath jumping quick and light.

He brought a hand to touch her chin, petitioning the return of her gaze. "I want you to be yourself, Lee," he whispered. "Tell me... why Sam? You were never in love."

Leah blinked rapidly, but he could see the burden of expectation evaporating from relief in her eyes.

"How did you know that?" she breathed.

Jacob's lips spread in a slow smile. "It's my job."

He pinched her chin reassuringly and then turned his back, pacing back toward his punching-bag tree to give her space. He mimed a slow-motion punch while he waited and then experimentally clasped and unclasped his hands, testing his knuckles. It was just about eight more minutes until they were back 100% - after his and Bella's bonding he healed faster too.

His mind turned to his Pack: everyone was in place: Paul was at the intersection and waiting; Sam was pacing circles around his house and the imprints. Jared and Quil were worried about Embry, but keeping the cubs in line and their borders sealed...

"I just... _decided_," Leah suddenly injected the words into the quiet weeping wood.

Jacob turned to find her watching him with eyes that were glazed by memories.

"Sam was the strongest man I knew," she whispered. "The only one I couldn't break."

Jacob's gaze gave her privacy and he watched his bruised hand trace the splintered bark of the poor brutalized tree.

"I just got sick of hearing it y'know?" she whispered. "Mom telling me I had to be more fucking ladylike. Kids calling me lesbo at school, people telling me I'd never find a man. I just thought if I-..."

She suddenly turned her back as her head bowed. "I liked hanging out with the guys y'know. Sammy was always a good friend and hooking up was fun... I mean..." she stopped with a soft laugh. "But yeah, we fought. A lot. But Sammy's such a daddy under it all. He wanted a family... I just wanted to get it all over with so I could get on with my fucking life. Seemed like a good enough deal. Best on the Rez anyway."

She wiped a palm down her face. "Then when all that shit with Em happened. I mean, I didn't understand," she rasped, pain bubbling up in her voice. "And everyone just said.. 'see, told ya, bitch.'"

She gasped at Jacob's hand on her shoulder and turned around with her lips pressed together over the liquid sadness in her eyes. "But poor Emmy," she breathed, a telltale hitch in her voice. "Poor Sam..."

"Shh," he soothed, turning her all the way around and placing his hands on each shoulder as he looked deep into her eyes. "They're okay, Lee. They are. Em's happy, Sammy's getting better. It's not your fault, it's just this crazy fucking shit we all got thrown into."

His eyes held steady while her gaze paced between them frantically, looking for bullshit or lies. She found none.

"So are you okay with it?" Jacob asked quietly. Everything was relative, of course, but from what he saw in her heart she was. Pride and ego just took a little longer.

Leah licked her lips, stiffening under his grip uncomfortably and he let his hands fall to his side.

"Yeah, I am," she whispered, her gaze falling between them. "It's kinda a relief, y'know?"

Jacob didn't answer, but just watched her gathering herself - watched thoughts and realizations sinking in. Finally she sniffled as she lifted her chin. "So why the fucking shrink session, huh?" she laughed harshly, her voice still buckling over emotion like frost heaves in the road.

Jacob adjusted his posture and clasped his hands behind his back. "Because I need you to be Beta and it wouldn't work unless you'd looked at this shit. Not with Sammy running third."

Leah frowned with defensive disbelief. "Fucking _Beta_? As in, _Second_?" she scoffed. "This some kinda consolation prize?"

Jacob's lips flashed up from his canines "I asked Bella who she thought was best, and-.."

Leah's lips twisted in a smirk that covered insecurity as she turned away. "Keep your enemies close?"

Jacob couldn't help the growl that ripped from his chest. His hand reached out and yanked her back to face him as he seared his displeasure into her eyes. "I don't do any fucking bullshit for pity or anything else," he snarled. "_Everything_ I do is for the good of the Pack."

Leah's eyes fell like lead as she naturally tipped her head to bare her neck in lupine appeasement.

"You're the best for the job, that's all there is to it, Lee," he spat, releasing her. "Bella sees it. I agree. You gotta sharp mind, a strong will and a calm head when it isn't playing the victim. You don't need a man to be strong - you were born to be a leader, Lee."

He paused, watching to see how she was processing all this. She wanted it - she was just scared It was what she'd been looking for, she just didn't know it: a place where she could use that strength among a Pack that had her back. Again her eyes darted up to his, pacing restlessly over his face and gathering courage from his certainty with each pass.

"You ready to step up?"

Leah stared at him for a moment and then cocked her head as that snarky personality filled in the final cracks of insecurity. "So do I get a badge or something?"

Jacob didn't even smile. Instead he took a step in, slowly raising his forearm up, wrist out.

Bella's truck still hadn't crested the hill where Paul waited and he was starting to worry. But he needed to take care of this first... for the good of the Pack. If something broke down, he would not leave them leaderless again.

"Bite, Lee," he whispered.

Her brow furrowed in shock. "What?"

"Bite," he repeated, heating his voice with soothing velvet to settle her human nerves. "I let Paul and Sam bite me last night. My blood will help you keep the Pack together if you have to step in." He'd had his father relate everything he knew about transferring power in a Pack - his old stories were good for something afterall.

"Wh-what?!" despite the heated power sparkling around them, Leah's voice was stretched over panic.

But unfortunately he didn't have time to wait for her warm to the idea.

Jacob's other hand slipped around the nape of her neck. "You're the only one who can keep them together, Lee. I won't leave my Pack without a leader again," he spoke in low hypnotic tones as he gently urged her in toward his arm. "Sammy, Paul and Embry will help. You can do it together."

"Jake, no," she gasped, meeting his eyes with fear. "You can't leave."

"I won't if I can help it," he crooned. "But you're smart enough to know I'm gonna fight to the death."

"B-but," she stammered, yet he could see the wolf in her starting to react to the scent and will of her Alpha.

"Let go, Leah," he breathed as he brought his arm to her lips. "Let your instinct -..."

Like a steel trap, her teeth snapped with feral gusto on his arm and her inadvertent groan vibrated against his arm. Jacob stoically watched her suckle against skin for a moment before she released him with a gasp.

Leah swayed on her feet with a soft moan as her eyes rolled with the infusion of power - just enough to rise up should the need demand. It should also help shore up her confidence and strength for the next leg of this battle.

Jacob's hand slipped from around neck to rest on her shoulder, steadying her, while the other wiped a drop of his blood from her lips.

Her eyes fluttered open, the pupils wide and then abruptly contracting in his eyes. For several seconds she just stared at him - silently communicating a million things that her ego would never allow her to say. In that moment she was open and strong - a woman and a leader and a glimpse of who she would be someday. It reminded him of Bella - how different they were, but also how similar. Strength was such a funny thing - dominance had nothing to do with it. Bella was the perfect complementary counterpart to his dominant energy - feminine, sensual, submissive... yet somehow even stronger than this tough woman before him.

Yet it reminded also him that Leah was undeniably female, no matter how tough she was and the man in him would never have touched a woman as he had. Jacob had known that the dominant in her needed a harsh push to break down those walls and the new frightened wolf needed the boundaries of containment, but in that moment - thinking of his mate and how he'd have killed a man for less - there was still something unsettling about it.

Jacob brushed her ebony bob back from her face, feeling the sticky blood on his hands catch in her hair.

"In the kitchen Saturday... the Alpha in me..." he began quietly, the words also uncharacteristically catching in his throat. "I-...I just see Pack... not woman. I'm still figuring shit out." It was as much of an apology as she would get because in the end she was a wolf to an instinct that made no divisions based on gender, but only saw needs, ability and strength.

But Leah got it - her lips hitched up slowly in a novocaine smile that was sly, though still drunk from the infusion of power. "Don't go all pussy on me," she whispered, the soft intimacy of her voice at flagrant odds with the words. "I was just starting to respect you a little, Black."

Jacob sniffed a laugh and leaned down to press his lips to her forehead. "You're such a bitch, Lee," he breathed over her skin.

Pulling back he saw the first sincere smile he'd ever seen on her face and it was something beautiful to behold. He wished he had the time to just sit back and enjoy.

But Bella's truck still hadn't come over the rise and now that this hurdle was out of the way, instantly all of Jacob's attention snapped to that fact. Embry would have been keeping an eye on her no matter what, so if something had gone wrong, he'd have sounded the alarm. But still...

"Do you think she's safe?"

Embry's dusky voice thankfully brought Bella out of increasingly morose thoughts. Bella turned from watching trees whip by out the passenger window.

"I know she is, Emb," she whispered soothingly. "She's in school and then she has a yearbook meeting this afternoon."

Embry kept his eyes on the wet road but nodded stiffly. The windshield wipers droned on in clumsy thunks over the the soft swish of rain.

Bella had related everything she knew about Anglea to his voracious attention and watched him tuck away each word behind that new yearning in his eyes. He just wanted to see her, to spend time with her, to learn to love her. It was interesting to see imprinting without resistance - Embry had complete faith in his heart.

"Shit!" Embry spat.

Bella bolted upright in her seat as her eyes followed his intense gaze out the windshield. They had passed the last building of Forks proper a few miles back; she saw nothing but trees.

Icy dread trickled down her spine. "What, Emb," she breathed.

Embry's nostrils flared, and he glanced at her. "They're chasing us," he murmured grimly.

"Who?!" Adrenaline was instantly searing through her veins.

One of Embry's hands left the steering wheel to engulf hers with comfort. "Shh, sweetheart," he soothed. "It's the Pack."

Bella blinked in surprise, scanning the woods again. "Who?" she repeated.

"Paul," Embry growled.

Bella's brow furrowed as she shimmied her hand free and turned around to press her face to the passenger window. Now that she knew what to look for, she could just see flashes of grey in the dark dripping woods keeping pace with the truck.

Biting her lip, Bella started rolling down the window.

"Bella, what are you doing?!" Embry hissed, reaching out a long arm to snatch her wrist.

Bella glanced over her shoulder. "Embry!" she bit out curtly, not meaning for her stress to sizzle in the word.

The man instantly released her as his eyes swooped down to the seat.

_Oh, crap. _

"Sorry, Emb," she whispered, reaching out to his hand to ground her sincerity with touch.

He clasped her hand for a moment in silent acceptance of her apology then returned to the wheel with a subtle lift of his chin.

But it was clear, she had inadvertently changed the dynamic between them from lifelong friends to solemn duty. They might have known each other since they were kids, but now she was also his Alpha's mate and that was something altogether different. It made her own shoulders settle back with the weight of responsibility - she had a duty too to Jacob as well as their Pack.

And right now, that was all about faith.

She turned back to the window and pumped it down the rest of the way with laborious jerks of her arm. "Paul," she gasped into the whipping wind and cold needles of rain.

The wolf yipped as he loped closer to the truck. She should hate him right now - he'd attacked Jake - but she... didn't. When she had grown to trust Paul Lahote was beyond her, but she simply knew she did.

So when his easy burst of speed took him past the truck to an access road turn-off, Bella firmly directed Embry to follow.

He did so without pause or question.

"He's here, Emb," she breathed, whipping back around to him as the truck bumped and lurched over the gravel road. She could _feel _Jacob- that subtle hum in the marrow of her bones.

Embry glanced at her and flipped his hair out of unreadable eyes. "Y'sure?"

Bella nodded vigorously, watching the wolf's spine stiffen.. He was still worried - but Bella wasn't anymore.

"It's gonna be okay, Emb," Bella whispered, reaching out to rest a reassuring hand on his thigh. She watched the magic of touch ripple through him as he sucked in a slow breath. "I think it's all somehow part of his plan."

Embry's brow furrowed and he glanced at her with dubious eyes.

And then slammed the truck to a halt.

With a shriek, Bella caught herself on the dash and her eyes snapped to the huge, gorgeous bare-chested man who was nearly upon the truck with his smooth lightning gait.

Bella scrambled to her knees, gasping his name as she threw herself out the window. His arms, so strong and sure, caught her easily, pulling her legs out the truck as he gathered her to his chest. Bella dove into his neck and her legs clamped around his waist like a vise. She was never letting go again.

"Jake, Jake, Jake!" she sobbed into his skin, yanking his scent into her starving body between each lament. Her arms squeezed him with all of her might.

A big hand cupped the back of her head while his arm wrapped tightly around her and she wept in relief.

"I'm sorry, honey." His voice was deep and gentle and was quite simply the best thing she'd ever heard in her life.

Bella abruptly pulled back, her eyes taking frantic inventory while they leaked hot unapologetic stress over her cheeks. Her fingers frantically traced over his face in their wake, smearing his lips and smooshing his nose in their fervent play to reassure herself that he was real and healthy and here.

The bloodshot eyes that stared back at her were anguished and tired... but they were clear. She couldn't believe she'd ever doubted him.

"I'm so sorry," he breathed. "I had to play it like that, Bells...I couldn't-..."

"I don't care," she wailed and then crashed into his lips so hard their teeth clicked.

Then she was kissing, kissing, kissing. Pushing the salty taste of fear past his lips. Her fingers twisted in his hair pulling him closer closer closer while he moaned quietly into her mouth. He tasted so incredibly good - warm and male and mate.

Finally, her anguish spent, she collapsed against his bulky shoulder and just silently wept.

"Shhh, honey, I'm okay," he soothed as his hand rubbed over her back. "You did so good, Bells."

Jacob's gaze darted out to where his wolves were respectfully giving them at least the illusion of privacy down the gravel road. Paul and Leah were giving Embry the breakdown.

"Bells," he breathed. He'd let her take what she needed first. Everything felt a hell of alot better with her in his arms, but cruelly they had only a few minutes.

The urgency in his voice had her sitting up in his arms instantly. She wiped at her face with an impatient sniffle. Her amber eyes were heated with gold as they flickered over his face, gathering all the little pieces of him that had been pulverized by 27 hours and eight minutes without her safe in his arms.

"I-...you-.." he breathed, the words getting caught in his throat as his brow furrowed. He needed her help, but it was just so hard to admit it. He wanted to be perfect for her.

A finger stilled his lips and then her cool hands slipped to his jaw. For a moment she just held him in her accepting gaze, in her tender palms. And then she gave him exactly what he needed

"Love you," she whispered as she leaned forward to press her lips to his in a silken honey oath. At the same time she unabashedly opened herself to him, the soothing liquid femininity of her being sluicing over the fires that still burned in his soul. Bella kissed him, slow and sensual and deep as a soft hum caressed his lips and finally he had peace.

'_Open, Jacob,'_ her voice was like mercury coalescing with a slickery grace over his resistant mind. _'Let me in.'_

He'd been holding everything in so tightly it was hard to let go. But with that gentle patience of hers, her energy seeped through the iron walls and ferreted out his fear, coaxing his humanity tenderly back up to the surface.

Finally their minds joined and they each broke the kiss with a gasp at the overwhelming pleasure of being reunited again. Bella pulled back, gazing into his eyes with a love and wonder that wasn't so different from the first time they'd imprinted. It was just surer.

Deeper.

Stronger.

"Bella," he breathed, his hand coming up to cup her cheek. "Mine."

A beautiful smile spread over her face.

"Mine," Bella whispered as her finger traced along his scruffy jaw. Jacob's eyes stayed locked with hers as he walked them slowly down the road and she simply relished feeling whole again.

"We just a have another minute, honey," Jacob murmured, pushing her wet hair behind an ear with a grimace of regret "Paul and Embry are going to take you back to the Rez."

Lightning images flashed through her mind from his: Jacob and Leah were going to go on to the old Hanson house, posing as Embry and Bella in the hopes of catching James from information given by Edward. Bella was being sent back with the other imprints.

Bella worried her lip as she looked into his intense eyes.

Finally she collapsed her forehead against his chin. "I don't want to leave you again," she whispered as she looped her arms around his neck in a feeble attempt to somehow make that possible.

"I know honey," he murmured, drawing in a deep breath of her scent. "It's almost over. Do you know what's going on with your dad?"

Bella sighed heavily, stroking her fingers over the nape of his neck. "He sold us out," she whispered.

"No he didn't, Bells," Jacob rubbed her back soothingly and Bella jerked her head back to look at him with disbelieving eyes. "He took you to school this morning, right?" he smiled.

Bella nodded.

"I texted him last night," he whispered. "He's just one hell of a fucking actor."

In a flash of his memories he showed her how he had texted Charlie late last night a simple directive: "school a.m." In that one brief mental download Bella suddenly understood just how much Jacob had been controlling information in a game with a mind-reader.

And just how smart her father had been.

"He's meeting with the Cullens and your dad this morning," she breathed. "He was going to pick me up at noon at school. Can I at least stop by my place to get some clothes?" She was uncomfortably wet and she just didn't want to wear someone else's clothes right now.

Jacob rolled his lips and then his gaze darted thoughtfully behind her.

Bella looked over her shoulder to find the three wolves mere steps away and staring back at them with that cagey ready. It was then that she realized just how intimately she was clinging to Jacob and, as color charged to her face, Bella wiggled to get down.

Jacob, on the other hand, didn't seem the slightest bit embarrassed to be so openly showcasing their intimacy in front of his wolves - he let her down, but didn't come close to letting her go. Leaning over he almost absently pressed his lips to her hairline before pulling her possessively into his side.

"Embry," he reached out an arm and the man stepped in to clasp forearms. "Thanks, man."

"He imprinted," Bella smiled gently, speaking to the stress she still saw in the wolf's eyes.

Jacob didn't let his friend's arm go. "I felt it," he said quietly. "Who is she?"

"A really good friend at school, Angela," Bella informed him, sending him a memory of both Angela and the imprint in the parking lot.

He glanced down at her, a smile softening his lips before he met Embry's gaze again. "Makes sense," he murmured meaningfully. The two of them had been close friends since childhood, it only made sense for their imprints to get along well too.

Embry's gaze dipped to the forest floor as his lips seemed to battle between a sentimental smile and a worried grimace. Bella's heart thudded painfully and she looked up at Jacob; he was studying the man carefully.

"So change of plans: Paul's going to take Bella to Charlie's place to pick up some clothes. Embry, run ahead and scout for leech - James or Cullen," he ordered quietly as he released his friend.

Embry flipped his hair out of his eyes as he looked back up at his Alpha with attentive eyes.

"Billy and Charlie are meeting with the rest of the Cullens - I think they'll distract them as long as they can - so Paul, stop by Charlie's on your way to the Rez," he paused looking back down as Bella. "Edward wasn't at school?" he asked her.

Shaking her head, Bella looked up into his eyes sending him a quick mental summary.

Jacob nodded subtly. "So the blond is still at school or at least staying out of things for now," he summarized for the other three. "That motherfucking mind-reader and the witch must be with James - and the rest of them are with our fathers. Everyone's accounted for."

Jacob pulled her in front of him and wrapped his arms around her.

"Emb, once they're at Charlie's, run down to Forks and keep an eye on things there - see if the blond leaves school or if James circles back looking for Bella," he ordered quietly.

Bella leaned back against his chest, looping her hands up around his big forearms and squeezing gratefully: he'd made sure Embry could also keep an eye on his new imprint. Even in the middle of a war, Jacob took care of his own.

"We gotta head out," Jacob announced and Bella stiffened, even though she knew it was coming. "Emb give me your sweatshirt."

Jacob turned her in his arms and Bella's arms snapped around his waist. She looked up into his face fearfully.

Jacob's hands slipped up to cup the back of her head as he bent down to place a long caressing kiss to her lips. Bella closed her eyes and frantically gulped down every taste, scent and sensation. She wanted that kiss to last forever, but Jacob gently but firmly pulled away. "Just a little longer, honey," he breathed over her lips, warm and tender.

Bella nodded brusquely, biting her lip as she squeezed her eyes closed on the burn of tears.

Jacob's big hand pulled her to his chest for a moment.

"Can you give Leah your jacket, Bells?" his voice finally rumbled under her cheek, and Bella pulled away with a juicy sniffle. She stepped back, slapping embarrassed palms over the wash of emotion that had silently leaked down her cheeks.

She met Jacob's concerned gaze, and pulled the zipper of her macintosh down with one hand as the other dug out her phone and keys. Her eyes cut over to Leah standing just steps away; it surprised her, but there wasn't the usual brash impatience in her eyes.

Bella peeled off her damp jacket and handed it to the wolf.

"I might pop a few seams on this thing," Leah smirked, reaching out to take it.

Their fingers brushed - intentionally on Leah's part, she realized - and the hum of lupine touch shimmied up her arm. It was a step in the right direction for Leah.

Even though she tried to deny it.

"But I don't envy you tryin' to keep _Lahote _outta trouble," she laughed around a wry smile. "That's a fucking losing battle right there."

Bella looked out at the wolf who was wrinkling his nose in a sarcastic sneer. "I think it's more of a harm reduction kinda thing," Bella chuckled softly, trying to do her part to keep things light. It didn't really help the lead weight that had replaced her heart in her chest.

Paul's gaze darted down to her and he gave her a wolfish smile that only partially covered the intensity that was gathering below the playful veneer. "Ready, little girl?" he opened his arms.

Bella glanced behind her to find Jacob watching her intently as he shoved an arm in each sleeve of Embry's hoodie.

'_I can't do this if you shut me out again,'_ she silently told him. She didn't want to put any more stress on him, but it was simply the God's honest truth.

Jacob yanked the sweatshirt over his head and in the next breath had swooped her up in his arms bridal style.

Bella blinked rapidly from the head-spinning, supernatural speed as he pressed a kiss to her lips. _ 'I won't as much as I can.' _

She knew it was the closest thing to a promise that he could give her. Bella pressed her face into his shoulder as her arms wound around his neck.

"It'll be over soon, honey," he whispered.

Then he was pressing her into another heated chest. Bella opened her eyes to find Paul's gaze locked with his Alpha's as she was being gingerly transferred into his beefy arms. Bella hadn't really thought about _how _Paul was going to take her back to her house, but somehow this mode of transportation hadn't even crossed her mind.

For a moment, Jacob paused, staring into the the wolf's eyes with incandescent fire.

"You know I got this, Chief," Paul whispered, his face chillingly intense.

Jacob nodded once and this his gaze darted down to meet hers.

Bella's arms tentatively slithered around Paul's neck as she held her lover's gaze. "I trust him. Jake," she murmured - quiet, but sure and true. She wanted them all to hear it.

With a last entrusting glance at his Pack mate, he released her and took a brisk step back.

A cold wet sensation on her ankle had here squeak and look down at where Embry's wolf was nuzzling the swath of skin between her jeans and chucks. With an apologetic lupine chuff, the animal tossed his head and cantered out into the woods. The rain was starting up again in soft rushing whisper over the canopy of leaves.

"I got ya, Bella," Paul's low voice rumbled against her and Bella blinked up up in surprise at those keen black eyes watching her - not a trace of his signature smirk was left in that sober expression. It was the first time she'd heard him call her by her name.

He held her gaze for a moment, allowing her to see clear down past all the damage and deflection. In a flash of insight she realized that all this bravado and machismo had been slathered on over a profoundly sensitive heart.

"I know," she whispered simply. With a final glance at her mate, she laid her cheek on Paul's shoulder and readjusted her arms around his neck.

Paul turned his back on his Alpha and jogged easily out into the forest after the loping beige wolf.

Jacob watched him go as he pulled the hood up on the sweatshirt.

"Paul's the best fuckin' scrapper I've ever seen," Leah's voice pulled Jacob's attention to the woman stuffing her arms into a jacket that was about four sizes too small. "Y'know... other than you."

He knew she was trying to be reassuring, but that was _his _job. His lips flashed up reflexively from his canines, but his heart wasn't really in it.

Leah's eyes darted down to the ground anyway with a private smile. "Y'know, Black, if you want me to be Second, you gotta actually accept a little help every once in awhile," she mumbled cannily, socking him in the shoulder as she strode smoothly toward the truck.

Jacob's nostrils flared as he watched the woman yank open the passenger door without a backward glance. He cut his eyes out to the empty woods and then turned on his heel after her.

Bella had been right - she'd said Leah was probably the only one who could deal with his "hair-trigger-macho-thing" without getting her head ripped off. Whether it was the absence of pungent testosterone or something else, the wolf in him didn't view her as the same kind of threat.

Jacob came around the truck and threw himself in the driver's side, turning over the engine and fluently throwing the vehicle in reverse even before he'd closed the door. They were late - still in the acceptable range, but they only got this one chance.

"You gotta scoot down, Lee," Jacob growled as gravel flew up with clanging percussion.

Leah dutifully hunched down in the seat and pulled up the hood of the jacket (which did look pretty stupid only covering about ¾ of her arm - but it was more about scent than anything). If he'd played this thing right, James and Edward would be running sloppy and not expecting a trap in a million years.

Jacob spun the truck backward out onto the empty road and then peeled off with the squeal of tires.

"Aww," Leah laughed quietly, pulling a piece of paper from the dashboard.

The rain had started coming down hard again, and he flipped on the windshield wipers as he glanced over at the picture being held up by his Second with a lopsided smile.

He sniffed as he returned his eyes to the road, keeping his face pointedly stoic even though he knew she could hear the double beat of his heart. Jacob could feel Bella's love slowly changing him - not only with its accompanying balance but with a different set of rules. He'd have time to figure out what it all meant later.

"Embry's imprint drew it," Jacob said quietly. Bella was open and her memories were drifting through his mind as Paul ran with her through the forest.

"Not bad," Leah nodded in his periphery as she examined the drawing for a moment more before replacing it on the dash. "So you guys have some kinda mind-thing?"

Her deconstruction didn't really surprise him. That girl was sharp. Jacob wasn't in the habit of keeping things from his Pack if it wasn't necessary, but he hadn't figured out how he wanted to play this yet. Especially in light of Billy's stories about legendary warriors coming back with their mates. He and Bella had decided to ignore them for the time being, but the information had quickly filtered out to the rest of his Pack. He could feel their confusion fear - frankly that unease had made it as easy as it had been to push them into turning their backs.

But if Leah was his Second, he'd have to trust her.

"Yeah we do," he murmured, glancing into the rear-view mirror as he slid down a little farther in his seat. He was a good bit bigger than Embry too. " 'Haven't figured it all out yet." He glanced over at her with a dark look that effectively ended the discussion.

Completely unperturbed, Leah's gaze slipped out on the road as she leaned back against the seat. "I like her, Black," she said simply.

The corner of Jacob's lips hitched up as he settled back himself and steered them through the rain hopefully to the last stand of this thing.

At his prompting, Sam was now filling in Jared, Quil and the rest of the Pack. They would be heading down to the Rez's south border - just several miles and minutes away from back-up and the old Hanson house. It was an abandoned mansion a few miles upriver from the River Inn on the far outskirts of town. It had a reputation for being haunted - so folks steered clear except teens on Halloween - and it was the perfect rest-stop for a crazed and healing wolf.

Jacob watched his Phased Pack congeal with relief and understanding around the revealed play as he infused them all with reassuring heat and pushed them to move.

"So you know what to do, Lee?" Jacob asked as the truck turned the last bend to the river.

Leah glanced over at him with business-like nod as she pulled the hood farther down over her face. "You get psycho, I grab the pansy."

"And if things go south, you just get outta there," he bit out grimly. She was the fastest of the Pack - faster than even Quil.

"You want me to just turn tail and run?" Leah barked a soft laugh. "No way."

Jacob jerked the truck into a screeching halt in the road as he turned to her. "It's my job to take care of _you_, Lee," he hissed. "And if something happens to me, you take care of the Pack. That's the way it goes down, otherwise you can get out of this truck right now."

Leah turned into his searing gaze - it was the kind of intensity that didn't force her eyes to the floor. He was speaking to her as Pack-mate... as equal. He wouldn't Order this kind of loyalty.

"I got it, Jay," she whispered - sincere and true. She drew in a deep breath as she licked her lips. "I'll take care of her too."

_Bella._ She was offering to protect his mate - he'd chosen a better Second than he could have hoped for.

Jacob nodded curtly. "There's one more thing I need you to understand Lee," he said quietly.

At his tone she blinked twice, the slightest furrow appearing between her brows. She could tell what he said next would be important. Actually it was more important than anything he'd said to her to date.

"Harry wasn't your fault, Leah," he said slowly, succinctly, watching the jagged pain shoot across her face pulling her gaze down with her head. "It was mine and mine alone."

He paused then, waiting for her eyes to focus back in his.

"And I'm sorry."

'

"What are you thinking about so hard there, Swan?" Paul murmured.

Bella blinked up to see him watching her out of the corner of his eye as he jogged with the ease of a machine through the dripping forest. They were almost to her house.

She shook her head and leaned back against his rain-slicked shoulder. She was watching Jacob's heart hemorrhage, but she wouldn't tell him that. Both she and Jake were worried about Leah - she'd had so much heartache in such a short time - but somehow he was bringing her through it with strength, not vulnerability. Bella couldn't wait until this thing was over so they all could heal... providing they survived it of course.

"I can't believe my dad was faking everything," she murmured, redirecting her own thoughts as well as Paul's. "I mean the things he _said_."

"Well when you gotta lie, best to make it as close to the truth as possible," Paul chuckled. " 'Specially with supernatural noses, a mind-reader and an empath all in the same fucking room."

"How did you know about Jasper?" Bella picked her head up in surprise.

The corner of Paul's lips hitched up as he looked down at her. "Jake was pacing laps behind your house, yesterday. Charlie dropped some hints."

"But my dad asked the Cullens why they didn't just _kill him_," she mused, shaking her head in disbelief.

"He was probably just fishing for info... plus have you seen the way your dad looks at Jake?" Paul barked a laugh. "There's definitely part of him that wants to kill 'em all right."

A soft yip had Bella whipping around to where Embry was circling back.

"All clear, pup?" Paul gave him a saucy smile.

The wolf chuffed in annoyance.

Bella blinked and scanned the woods again, suddenly realizing they were on the ridge above her house. Paul, jogged down the embankment toward her back yard. Embry followed them closely to back porch.

"Fuck, I can still smell the bloodsuckers all over this place," Paul spat - a sentiment that was echoed in Embry's rumbling growl.

Bella's nose wasn't _that _good. "But they're not here, right?"

Paul shook his head. "It's hours old."

He was up the stairs in two fluid leaps and then let her slither down to the porch.

"Thanks," Bella smiled up at him, rubbing her hands on her jeans.

Paul gave her grin that covered up his discomfort and patted her pertly on the head.

Bella dug her keys out of her pocket, bringing her phone with them as she turned to Embry sitting at the bottom of the stairs and panting up at them.

"You're going to head into Forks? Keep an eye on Angela for me?" It was certainly a rhetorical question, but the wolf seemed to need the dismissal. The animal tossed his muzzle and stood, swaying back and forth on his forepaws. Bella jerked her chin toward the woods and the wolf turned tail and loped across the back yard.

With the jangle of keys, Bella crossed the porch to where Paul pulled open the screen with a casual hand at odds with the furtive intensity with which he cased her yard. She pushed open the door and Paul slipped in before her with serious eyes and a staying hand. He prowled silently across the kitchen as Bella shut the door behind her. The house felt dark and empty - the rain pattering across the tin roof of the porch and hitting window panes like a whisper.

A soft fleecy thunder shook the distance and a shudder went down her spine. Bella hunched her shoulders against the damp chill that crept over her now that she was out of Paul's unnaturally heated arms. She needed to dry off and change clothes - she headed for the dryer to fetch a clean towel..

But her phone buzzing in her hand made her freeze in her tracks. Taking a deep shaking breath she set her keys down on the counter and flipped it open to the single text from her father's number.

_Bella: need to talk. Call when alone. No wolf._

'

"Why are you alone! Where is he?!" Jacob bellowed, ripping the leech out of Leah's hands and throwing him against the truck with a crash that was echoed by distant thunder.

"Looks like I caught me a rat," Leah smirked, leaning her elbow against the truck as she surveyed her prize with pride. Jacob had left her in the truck as bait while he sniffed around the still silent house. Apparently when Edward had reached in to snatch the picture from the dash with patronizing words, Leah had sprung like a trap.

Edward's face was frozen in patent shock- it was an extremely satisfying (and telling) expression.

The wolf in him snarled as he picked up the bloodsucker and slammed him again into the side of Bella's truck. This was only half of their prey - and the far wimpier half at that.

"Where's James," Jacob snarled, spittle spraying over the vampire's face. "And the witch."

Something was off here, he just couldn't put his finger on it; James was nowhere to be seen (or scented). Prickling instinct crawled up the back of his neck like an army of ants.

Edward's eyes looked just as confused - and afraid.

"He thought psycho would be here too," Leah whispered.

Jacob glanced at her worried eyes and nodded in agreement.

"Something's wrong," he growled.

'

Something was wrong.

Bella was still frowning at the text when Paul crept back in the room. She could count on one hand the number of times her father had texted her.

"The house is clear," the man informed her quietly, his brow furrowing at her expression.

Bella nodded absently, as she leaned back against the counter and considered the text. There was a funny little feeling in the pit of her stomach. But with this last week was it any wonder?

"I'm gonna get changed out of these clothes," Bella murmured, pushing off the counter as she met Paul's gaze with troubled eyes.

"You okay?" he mumbled, shoving his hands into his pockets insecurely. He thought she was uncomfortable with _him _- she could see it in his eyes..

She nodded, snapping her phone closed and slipping it into her back pocket. She was going to trust her father enough to at least find out what he had to say - she'd owed him that much. She felt horrible saying the things she had to him when he _had been_ doing what was best for her, just like he'd said.

And she hadn't trusted him.

She climbed the stairs feeling nervous and edgy and went straight to her room. Another wave of storm was coming in and it whipped against the polyurethane tacked over her window with a volley of rain. Bella closed the door quietly behind her and pulled out her phone.

She paced slowly to her bed as she found his contact and dialed the number. It rang as she sat down on the edge of the mattress.

"Dad, I'm sorry-..."she began as soon as it picked up.

She was stopped by the breathy chuckle on the other end of the line.

"Hello, girl," a cold and clammy voice Bella had never wanted to hear again in her life slithered over static of the phone. "You're going to do exactly what I say or I'll kill him, are we clear?"

Bella couldn't help the catch of terror that turned her blood to liquid nitrogen and made her heart beat brittle.

"Are you alone?" the vampire hissed.

Bella glanced at her closed bedroom door as lightning flickered outside and pushed the word out of her constricting throat in a whisper:

"Yes."

'

* * *

'

_Review if you like._


	22. Ends

Note: Skip down to the line if you don't want to read about my behind-the-scenes strategy with Leah.

Last chapter I got one note (anon of course) from someone who still didn't get the Leah thing. I wanted to take a sec to give you a sparknotes version of my thoughts behind this character for anyone else who doesn't get it or wants to know. It touches on several important issues for this fic and for me personally so indulge me (or don't and skip it).

Even though Leah's just a background character, she was crafted with care (like all of them) and she – particularly - is used as a prism to exaggerate more subtle points previously made. (But a side note, I'm neither interested in or inviting debate, I'm just giving you a rundown) This was my strategy:

1. I love the yin/yang dichotomy in general so I wrote a very yin Bella in contrast to a very yang Jake. I wrote Leah yangy too though (to book canon - Julia's a lil' too dainty in the films) to underline that there are many ways to be a woman - none of them "right" - and comparatively to show that strength doesn't necessarily correlate with dominance.

2. I never understood "Leah and Sam" (personalities don't fit + why would such a strong character get engaged in HS?) and wanted to resolve it as cleanly as I could in the _background _while leaving her empowered, not bitter. I think I parsed a solid character psych for her and I like to think seeing inside a friend's head (Sam's) with an ounce of compassion would do wonders. Heart could forgive, ego and pride would take longer - unless they're given something better ...

3. I don't think women inherently need to be treated _differently_, in fact in some instances it's more degrading if they are. Leah is a dominant (and a _wolf _- see #4) and was treated with the same harshness (less actually, but in my mind Jake knows how much someone can take)as Paul and the others and she was just as afraid as the males, no more.

4. Wolves are wild, can be savage, and their hierarchy is based on dominance/submission. There is no difference in gender when it comes to violence on the hunt or among themselves (and females are often the fiercest). I'm writing these shifters to be dangerously teetering between these two natures, not as fluffy little housepets.

5. While I incorporate more spiritual and psychological concepts than some, this is _still fantasy and romance_ - my world, my rules. And in my world, Leah doesn't feel abused or belittled, but is healing and feels free, finally valued for who she is, and that she just might have a purpose in life after all.

6. And lastly, since I created him for another fic, I've always seen Leah as destined for Josiah which if I end up writing an epi, you will see.

'

* * *

'

Kay, guys… I did it! This is the last chap. You could reward me for my efforts by simply getting your head out of RL - put the song on and/or read the lyrics, they're meant to slip you in - and slowing down with some tea, wine, somethin'...

Longer than I had intended, if I've done it right, it might make your adrenal glands wanna tap out.

**Warning:** Some disturbing themes/sections ahead. Actually I'm a little bit frightened that I can write a character like James - I even consciously toned him down But I'm a nutso empath and I write by creating a character psych, understanding them, and then channelingl/intuiting them and they write the story for me. I guess what I'm saying is: don't blame me, he scares me too.

'

**Song/lyrics: **Curious Angels- Rob Dougan (**Tgat**: he's of Matrix soundtrack infamy :-) Here, if you're interested: grooveshark**DOT**com/s/Furious+Angels/4y3p7C?src=5:

Thanks always to Tayjayfan just for putting up with me.

Whew! Long notes. Sorry.

'

On all accounts, thanks for reading, hope you enjoy.

'

* * *

'

Like a sentence of Death

I've got no options left

I've got nothing to show now

'

I'm down on the ground,

I've got seconds to live

And you can't go now

'

'Cause love, like an invisible bullet,

Shot me down and I'm bleeding

Yeah I'm bleeding

'

And if you go

furious angels

will bring you back to me

'

will bring you back to me

'

**22 - Ends**

'

"**I won't fucking ALLOW it!****"**

'

His bellow rolled through the house, making the echoing thunder sound like nothing but an effete whimper.

"Jacob-..." Bella tried to keep her voice soft. Calm.

Jacob's every muscle was taut and straining, vibrating so rapidly, his form was blurred. A growl clawed its way out of his body and he stumbled backward even as his gnashing teeth chewed it to gritty meal.

A pair of hands frantically pulled her back and she stumbled into a heated chest as a big arm snapped around her waist and held her fast. Lupine fear corroded the damp air of her living room with a sharp acrid scent that made Bella's new nose burn. Paul, Embry, Quil: they were all afraid.

Of Jacob.

Bella probably should be too - the sight of this man before them, drawn and quartered between two forms and effectively burning at the stake, was a terrifying thing to behold.

But she knew it so deep in her heart: no matter how hard the Alpha railed against being outmaneuvered, no matter how fiercely the wolf tried to beat reality into submission, no matter how close the man got to losing control...

Jacob would never, ever hurt her.

So she wasn't afraid. But she mourned, she _ached_. Because those burning eyes, locked on her while his rage foamed between bared teeth were windows to a holocaust soul.

Bella wanted nothing more than to give him whatever he needed to soothe that unbearable agony, but she had a duty. And right now - in the middle of many different kinds of storms - it was somehow as clear as day. She drew her line in indelible pastel:

"I won't risk my dad, Jake," she said softly, firmly. It felt like the entire room drew in a breath of silence over the rain, nervously tapping over the roof.

And then Jacob exploded.

With a roar of fury, a mushroom cloud of heat billowed across the room as he whipped around and threw his fist into her father's living room wall. The force shook the house to its foundation.

" 'Kay, that's it," a low voice choked in her ear and Bella's feet were being pulled off the floor by hot, quivering arms as another crash came like a violent aftershock.

"Paul," Bella bit out firmly, twisting around to find his heated eyes trained on his raging Alpha. "Put me down."

From behind her, an echoing snarl savagely mauled the room.

Instantly Bella's feet were back on the floor and Paul was stumbling back. His wide unblinking eyes stayed locked over her head.

Bella turned over her shoulder to find Jacob trapping his wolf in damning heat, his lips lifted in a silent, wicked snarl.

"Jake, please," she breathed, petitioning Paul's release.

Those fiery eyes snapped down to hers and another growl hashed through his bared teeth as she heard Paul gasp in a breath of freedom behind her.

"We'll stay connected, Jacob... I trust you, I know you'll figure something out," she crooned quietly as she slowly turned her body around to face him. "It's the best chance we have to find James and get my dad outta this alive."

Jacob's hands clenched into fists as he took a single step toward her, his eyes hot coals.

"I _won't _fucking lose you again," he hissed low, each word sparking like steel on stone. "Not in _this _fucking life too."

With that he whipped around and tossed over the couch with an incidental flick of his wrist. It tumbled across the room with a booming crash that echoed out into the weeping rain.

Bella quickly turned to where surprise had colored the fear on Paul, Embry and Quil's faces.

"Leave us," she whispered as another deafening crash sounded behind her.

Three sets of eyes snapped to her in disbelieving unison.

She met each wolf's gaze with the unequivocal edict, ending in Paul unadorned and worried eyes. "Go," she whispered with a jerk of her chin toward the front door.

Bella promptly turned her back on them, bowing her head under the waves of heat and pain surging across the room from her mate.

When the door clicked closed behind her, she looked up at her best friend whom she'd known all her life.

His back to her now, he had thrown the 6-foot oak bookcase from the wall and was braced against it. His muscles slithered over his sweat-slickened back, and his shoulders and biceps jumped and shuddered. Each breath was taken in a gasp and released in a rippling growl.

It was a _shocking _transformation from that boy she'd known only a year ago: rage poured off that 6'7" adult body whose powerful musculature was spasming so violently she felt like she could hear the groan of his straining bones. Fate had twisted Jacob into something unrecognizable.

On the outside.

But still Bella's heart knew him well. Jacob had always carefully chosen the things he cared about. Oh, he laughed off things like school, other's opinions, and convention with a carefree irreverence, but of the things he decided to care about? Jacob never ever even _considered _the option of giving up or failing.

He'd attentively fix and care for a dirt bike, a carving, his friends, father - _even her_ - with an untiring intensity that even that innate patience, good nature and childhood sunny smile couldn't hide. It made him the most dedicated and loyal of friends.

But now it was tearing him apart.

Because right now, he had nine wolves (in various states of disrepair) who were his responsibility along with their mates and effectively the safety of an entire tribe.

Jacob had given his heart and soul to his people and to her. He'd always unequivocally understood the meaning of love - he'd give his life happily for his heart. But there were many ways to lay down your life for love and he'd pretty much hit every single one of them. Jacob had effectively died hundreds of little deaths over this year.

And, in his mind, he'd still failed.

He'd finally been pushed past his breaking point. It was so easy to forget how young he was - how young they both were. But even though his transformation had not only supernaturally developed his body but his mind as well, Jacob's warm, caring heart was still only 17.

And it had always loved so deeply.

Lightning flashed outside, mimicking moments of sunlight in the unnatural dusk of the storm. Bella drew in a deep breath as these thoughts raced through her mind as she slowly crossed the room toward him.

She thought about who he'd been. Who he was now. Who he could be.

Dragging her fingers across the upturned bottom of the couch as she passed, she flicked the cobwebs from her fingers as she considered those broad heaving shoulders.

But Bella loved him deeply too... in that timeless unconditional way. And through all these storms and pit-stops she'd stand at his side.

Just as she knew - without a shadow of a doubt - he would for her too.

"**Stay away." **The words were guttural, black and bubbly like tar.

He'd shut her out ever since he'd burst into this living room with hell blazing in his eyes, but not ten minutes earlier, he'd been her unshakable ballast at high sea.

When James had called, she'd desperately reached out to Jacob for help - of course. It would've been idiotic to try to take on a psychotic vampire without supernatural help, even if her mate _weren't _the Alpha of a Pack of shape-shifting wolves.

Like the rock he'd always been in her most turbulent of times, Jacob had psychically stood at her side, talking her through the hardest thing she'd done in her life. So calmly, so surely he'd helped her get proof of life, buy some time and navigate a situation that shamefully would have left her nothing but a frantic quivering mess of flashbacks and fear.

Now it was her turn.

Bella set her jaw with determination as she took the last few steps.

"**LEAVE!" **The word was thrust over a growl and a harsh splintering sound and Bella looked up to see his hands clenching into fists, gouging deep trenches in the wooden trim.

"You told me that that last night, Jake," she whispered, taking the last step and reaching out a steady hand. "And I swore you'd never get away with it again."

Her mate's petulant rumble dissolved into a hissing exhale at the brush of her fingertips. With a private smile Bella reached up and ghosted both hands over those massive shoulders, smearing the beading sweat, massaging bunched steel covered by toffee satin. Her palms then slipped down his sides, caressing with patient tenderness and watching chill bumps race across his skin like rain.

As he relaxed, the soothing hum of their bond welled up, siphoning up her arms to slow the beat of her heart. And, finally, with a sigh, her arms encircled his waist as she melted against him.

Brushing her nose back and forth over the trench of his spine, she then counted three vertebrae with kisses and then collapsed her cheek against his sweaty skin. He smelled wonderful - virile and warm and _mine_.

"I dunno", she whispered. "Do you think that was a bigger tantrum than the one you threw over the Kawasaki?" She paused, laughing softly. "Definitely not as bad as when the grizzly split along the knot of that piece of oak."

Both of those childhood tantrums had been pretty spectacular - one ending up with a wrench through the garage window, another with an ill-fated month-long project nothing but a pile of wood chips. But more than that, it was calculated to normalize something that she knew scared the crap out of him (even if he'd never admit it).

And to remind him that she had never run away and certainly wasn't starting now.

The growls had stopped the moment she'd touched him, but still his breath jerked in harsh gasps. For several moments they stood there silently - a huge shapeshifter's defeat held in the diminutive arms of his mate while the rain danced heartlessly on the window and the thunder tumbled by.

"I-I _can't, _Bells." Jacob's whisper was rough, tortured.

And then he was pushing off the wall and seamlessly turning to gather her in his arms while he slid to the floor. He pulled her into his lap, melting around her and burying his face in her neck.

"I can't do it anymore," he mumbled into her skin.

Bella curled up into his heat, her hand slipping over his shoulder as she pushed her face dolefully into his wet ebony hair.

"You _can_, Jake," she murmured, even while he slowly shook his head. "We can do this. Didn't we always get through the worst stuff together?"

"Bells, this is different," he breathed, the moist heat of the words fanning up over her jaw.

She needed to see his eyes. With gentle hands, Bella petitioned his head up. He stubbornly refused.

"C'mon Jake," she pleaded quietly.

Finally he relented and lifted his face - eyes closed, lips pressed into a thin line. Bella's hand slipped to his jaw in concern as she sat up in his lap.

"Honey, look at me," she whispered.

His eyes blinked open obediently and Bella wanted to gasp at the pain that was ravaging that soul. Her brow furrowing, she sat up more, slipping a leg over his so she was straddling him. She cupped his hopelessness in her palms.

"Oh, Jacob," she sighed, leaning in to press her lips tenderly against his - they were warm and rigid and aching. Gently she brushed her mouth over his, kissing him with her breath, her heart, her soul. Finally his lips softened and returned the caress briefly before he jerked his face to the side with a harsh juicy sniff.

Tucking his head, he wiped his nose roughly with the back of his hand and then sniffled again while Bella watched him desperately try to hold it all inside.

"Heyy..." she murmured, her fingers ghosting over the taut muscles in his neck. "Honey, it's okay. We'll get through this."

With a final rough snuffle, he looked up at her with eyes that were liquid diamond. He let his head bonk back against the wall and regarded her silently for a moment.

"Will we?" he bit out quietly. "Because this is all feeling like one big fucking deja vue."

Bella blinked and her eyes flitted over his face. "You feel that?" she whispered.

Jacob's swallow was audible as he nodded. Mutely he brought his hand up to slowly, slowly follow a wayward strand of wet hair along her cheek. His eyes followed his fingers.

Bella watched the sorrow well and pool around the tumbling thoughts in his eyes. And she waited.

His other hand came up and his gaze snapped to where it repeated the ministration on the other side - so lightly it felt like a breath over her skin. Thunder rumbled in the distance and Jacob released a long heavy sigh as both his hands fell to her shoulders.

His gaze returned to hers, liquid, aching. "I can't lose you," he whispered.

Bella covered her hands on her shoulders with her own. "I'm not the Third Wife, Jacob. You're letting this thing fuck with your head."

Jacob blinked in surprise at her curse and she let a small impish smile flicker on her lips. She never swore on principle which made it all the more effective when she did.

"We can't let someone else write the end of this," she returned to serious. "You said it yourself."

Jacob's fingers threaded with hers as he drew in a slow breath. His face tipped down to their entwined hands as he settled them on her thighs.

"Jacob you're good," Bella said quietly. _"Scary good."_

He sniffed a humorless laugh and looked up with a wry and bitter smile. "It's never enough."

"_It. is. for. me,"_she bit each word off succinctly with protective heat. Because it was.

To hell with this crazy world that hurt her best friend, her lover, her wolf.

Her Pack.

Her father!

Charlie had been in physical pain – she'd heard it in the words he'd gasped over the phone.

"If we die, we'll do it together because I can't lose you too," she hissed fiercely. "But no one is dying today except for that freaking psycho leech."

Jacob's lips curved in a sad melting smile as tired eyes flickered over her face. "Alpha's mate," he mouthed silently.

Bella's hands slithered free from his and came up to twist in his hair as she leaned her elbows on his shoulders. She pressed a firm smacking kiss on his lips before she just smooshed their cheeks together and held him tight.

For a minute, maybe more, she just held him while she rode the rise and fall of his breath, feeling her eyelashes brush against his cheekbone and his hands smooth over her back.

Then finally, she pressed a kiss to that angular jaw and collapsed against him circling his neck squeezing tightly as his Jacob's heavy arms enfolded her in warmth and comfort. In spite of her impassioned soliloquy she knew it might _very well_ be for the last time she got to hold him. And if this were her last memory of him, she wanted it to be this: just this embrace and the feeling of two hearts that so naturally pulled together and beat in tandem.

She heard Jacob lick his lips as he tipped his head to rest against hers. "Love you so much," he said quietly.

"Love you more," she whispered.

He bonked his cheek once against hers in unenthusiastic reprimand.

A heavy sober quiet fell over them as they held one another tightly and their hearts beat out their yearning in Morse code against two sets of ribs separating them. Outside the thunder rumbled a requiem and the rain dwindled to whisper against the window panes, giving them this moment of silence.

To mourn all they had to lose. It might be the only chance they got to do it together.

At the hot wetness seeping through her damp shirt, she realized tears were silently streaming down her cheeks. She heard Jacob's slow labored swallow.

"No matter what, Bells," he breathed. "This ends here." The barely audible words were concession and vow and vendetta all in one.

And they chilled her to the bone.

Bella's eyes drifted closed as wave of anxiety buckled in her chest.

"This ends here," she repeated in a whisper.

'

'

The understated thunk might as well be the sound of a guillotine falling with his head on the block. Jacob curled his hands into fists and fingernails neatly punctured the heels of his hands as he watched Bella search the front seat of the 2012 Lexus ES 350 and then lean over to the glovebox.

She sat back up and glanced out at him through the windshield with a quizzical expression and a shrug. Jacob blinked out of his blood red haze.

"There's no key." Her voice already sounded miles away in the well-insulated luxury sedan.

Paul coughed a single ragged chuckle. "I'll help'er," he murmured as he strode toward the car.

It was a good thing too because if Jacob had gotten within grabbing distance, he didn't think he'd be able to control the impulse to do just that. The mandate to pull her out of that car and cage her in his arms was bludgeoning him over the head like a pneumatic hammer.

But then again, his team knew that. For the first time in his tenure as Alpha, he was actually feeling like a _member_ of his Pack instead of just its custodian. They were helping _him_.

Jacob and Leah had sprinted back in their other forms to the house as soon as Jared's backup team had arrived to help with the Cullen leech. They would keep that conniving son of a bitch alive (or whatever the fuck they were) until they knew they couldn't use him in some way. Edward had already said he didn't know where the psycho was, and Jacob believed the terror in his piss-yellow eyes.

He'd been played the same as Jacob.

"Push the button!" Paul silently mouthed the direction like he was yelling it with exaggerated gestures and snarky eyes.

Bella gave him a pointed bland stare and then promptly found the ignition and pressed it. An adorable smile of guileless delight lit up her face when the engine magically started.

Paul slunk back to where Jacob was standing beside Leah, earnest chuckles now falling from softened lips. Jacob would have never in a million years guessed those two would hit it off, but he supposed it made sense: Bella was drawn to help people in pain and Paul had never had someone care.

In hindsight, he was beginning to see all the little breadcrumbs of personality and aptitude sprinkled all through his own childhood that foretold the role he'd been born to play. But now he could see it clearly in Bella's too: she was made to stand at the Alpha's side. She'd worked the same miracles on his Pack that she had on him, all without even trying. Well that wasn't true, Bella _always _tried her best, especially for her friends. She was caring but stubborn, kind but strong, gentle but fiercely protective. She was perfect.

Just a little _too fucking perfect._

He couldn't _believe_ she'd gotten him to agree to this: to allow his mate- his _imprint_… the one being he was programmed to protect above all others - to get into one of the cars (that had been _so conveniently _left behind at Charlie's house by the Cullens) so she could meet a psychotic bloodthirsty demon _alone_.

James had given her directions to drive the Cullen's car to the parking lot of Cliff's Dive to await further instructions.

In this moment Jacob wondered if his father's stories were true because there was this intense feeling of foreboding as if his soul had been in this same place before. And it was savagely railing and piteously mourning and basically making him go out of his mind. It felt like stomach acid had overrun its bounds and was eating him alive from the inside out.

But as much as heart and instinct wanted to rip her out of that car and chain her safely behind Rez lines, Jacob would always give Bella what she needed. It was just part of who he was - as man and Alpha. He might have to run his Pack with a heavy hand because their wolves needed containment or shamelessly bend them to his will when it was for the good of all, but through it all he always did his best to care for their hearts.

And as much as both the man and Alpha wanted to do absolutely anything in their power to prevent Bella from leaving, she was the one person who's will he would never, ever dominate. His mate stood at his_ side_.

But his wolvish soul was an entirely different matter.

"Easy, Jay," Leah's whisper made his face snap around with bared teeth.

It was only then that he realized it was his growl, not the restrained whisper of a Japanese engine, that was tearing up the lawn as Bella cautiously backed the car over the crunching gravel.

Leah's eyes had naturally dipped in obeisance, but they now rose again to meet his.

"So I thought you saw 'ability and strength,' not gender," she challenged quietly.

Jacob's nostrils flared as his eyes did an unhurried circuit of the woman's face. _Oh-ho-ho... __everyone __was a little too fucking good at their jobs._

Without a word, he stoically panned out to where Bella was now shifting into drive. She lifted her hand and all three of them automatically did the same.

Then - just like that - she was driving around the bend.

He turned back to his Beta with hard eyes that covered molten magma. "It's not that she's female," he bit out crisply (even though part of it was, but it was a deep-seated instinct for a wolf - and a man - to protect his mate and Jacob didn't see any fucking problem with it).

"But she's 100 pounds wet and _human_," the words disintegrated in a growl.

Leah fearlessly faced him down. "But she's smart and she's strong."

"And it makes her awesome for this thing, Chief."

Surprisingly Paul joined in and Jacob turned to him with displeasure and a flash of canines.

Paul's eyes fell but his chin stayed up as he continued on. "_None of us_ fucking want her in this, Chief," he pressed with a quiet bite that sounded personal. "But since she is, you gotta admit: she's the perfect Trojan horse."

"Yeah, you know a lot about _trojans_, huh Lahote?" Leah's snide cut and thrust was calculated to distract Jacob from the fact Paul had basically just called his mate bait.

It was definitely Paul's lucky day.

Jacob snatched at the reprieve like a drowning man (which he was) as he turned his back on them and paced several steps across the wet yard. His hands slapped over his face and he rubbed briskly.

"Heard you were hitting it hard this year too, Lee-lee," Paul continued on with a snort, showcasing his usual bad judgment and big mouth. Jacob curbed the impulse to punch him.

"**STOP**," Jacob growled, raising a brusque hand. They were stressed and afraid, he could scent it. But he couldn't let it distract him from his game.

He quickly ignored the two as he brought Bella's field of vision front and center in his mind. She was cautiously making the turn onto the main road. The way she drove it would be almost half an hour before she made it to Cliff's.

But Leah and Paul were right, the strategist in him saw her as the perfect play too: basically a closed circuit hidden camera that would lead them straight to the lair of the dragon. But it was a hand he'd have never in a trillion years played because the stakes were unimaginable: the life of his best friend and lover.

Jacob couldn't be just "scary good," he had to be the best.

_And fuck it all to hell, he was. _

This bloodsucking demon wouldn't blindside him again.

"Okay, we gotta stay at least three miles away to keep from getting scented," he murmured to himself as he let his hands fall to his sides. It always helped to talk out loud when he planned and in this case it had the benefit of giving his Pack the play-by-play. "Especially until we figure out what the fuck's going on."

He paced toward the house while his mind spun, hearing his two wolves trailing silently after.

"Charlie's hurt bad so that fucker's not gonna drag him around," Jacob continued in a whisper as he jogged up the steps to the front door. He'd heard the pain in the man's voice through his connection with Bella. If Jacob had to guess, something was broken – there was only so much damage you could do when you couldn't afford to spill blood and risk eating your advantage.

"He's gotta be bringing her to some kinda home base," Jacob mused to himself. "Maybe he was there when he called… on the phone it sounded echo-y and I think I heard water. That would give him a getaway."

Leeches swam like guppies… wolves sank.

Jacob spun on his heel on the top step, stopping the other two in their tracks. "The lakes," he hissed. "Wherever that fucker called from, it was about 40 miles away north and that's about right."

Leah frowned. "How do y'know that?"

Jacob's gaze swept the yard thoughtfully as he put together all the pieces. "Storm was coming from the northwest and it took almost two minutes for Paul to hear it after she'd heard it on the phone," he murmured absently. "I mean, there's some delay too with cells."

"You counted the time it took for the sound to get to her house?" Paul balked. "Chief that's fucking nuts."

Jacob ignored them as he rolled his lips. "The lakes... that would make sense," he whispered, reaching up to bang a distracted fist against the porch post.

James had said on the phone that it was "a smart move" not to take her back to the rez, so somehow he'd figured out Jacob would be sending her back to their lands too. He was glad his intuition had let Bella deviate from the plan and come home because this motherfucker seemed like he was one step ahead of Jacob, every step of the way. But he had given something away with the comment: there was no way that James could have taken Charlie _and_ watched their borders – he _had_ to be working with someone other than that skinny Cullen.

"He mighta figured me out, but he's fucking underestimated her," he bit out. Jacob peeled a flake of paint from the post and flicked it into the yard as he looked up and met the attentive gazes of his two wolves. "He thinks because she stuck up for that waitress, that she'll sacrifice herself for her dad."

"So why wouldn't he tell Cullen what he was planning?" Leah murmured thoughtfully, leaning against the railing. "Distraction?"

Jacob absently shook his head while he raked his lip with his teeth. "Leah, you know what you gotta do. Go help Quil and Jared with the Cullen spawn until we figure out if we need 'em. Keep the rest of them in line and the cubs running patrols to look normal. Sam's running our way right now."

He was so incredibly grateful that this time he wouldn't have to worry about his Pack and could actually focus on what lay ahead. Leah would handle things, and handle them well. She might be inexperienced in this thing, but she was as smart as a whip… and the consummate delegator.

She nodded. "How's that bloodsucker handling things?"

"Sniveling, like a pussy," Jacob gave her a dark smirk. "You'll have fun."

A wry smile twisted her lips.

"Go ahead, get outta here," he jerked his chin. "I'm gonna make a quick call to my dad to find out what happened and whether he knows where the rest of them are and then Paul and I are gone too."

Holding her gaze with gratitude in his eyes, he offered his fist to his Second.

Leah paused, staring meaningfully back while a sad smile softened her lips. "You'll bring 'er back, Jay," she whispered as she bumped knuckles with her Alpha.

Jacob nodded imperceptibly as he pulled his hand in to crack his knuckles.

"And you' better come back too," she added wryly absently wiping her hands on her sundress. "There's no way I wanna run this Pack of ragtag motherfuckers full-time."

Jacob sniffed and then jerked his chin toward the back of Bella's house before turning his back on her and striding to the door. If Bella didn't make it back he wouldn't be coming back either.

"Paul," he called over his shoulder as he pulled open the screen door, holding his breath against the waft of Cullen leech.

His wolf slipped silently into the house on his heels. He followed Jacob to the kitchen without question or word - sometimes he knew when to keep that mouth shut… thank God.

Jacob had asked both him and Sam to run technical third together - and would ask Embry to do the same when he'd sealed his imprint and was back in the game (if he survived this thing). Together the four of them could run the Pack well if something happened to him: Leah to delegate and mediate and the three of them as a tripod of complete skills: Sam was an excellent strategist and would viciously protect his Pack, Embry's quiet power kept balance and perspective, and Paul was quite simply the ultimate weapon and every leader's wet dream in a war.

Jacob stopped by the old yellow wall phone and turned to find the man standing at ready and with his hands clasped behind his back in the middle of the kitchen. Cocking his head, Jacob considered him a moment.

"Did she ask you?" he whispered.

Paul blinked in surprise and then uncomfortably worked his jaw. "Who?"

Ah, he knew _exactly _what Jacob was talking about which effectively answered the question.

Jacob rolled his eyes. "C'mon P, I can _hear _your heartbeat," he laughed bitterly. "Did she ask you to kill her if she gets turned?" The blasphemous words burned their way over his lips in a growl.

Paul's gaze fell to the floor. "Yes," he said quietly.

Jacob closed his eyes as he took a few controlled breaths.

"What did you say?" The spiderweb words clung to the back of his throat.

"I said yes."

Swallowing thickly, Jacob squeezed his eyes and then opened them to see the man glancing up at him with an expression that was a first for Paul: genuine, heartfelt concern.

Fuck they were all just starting to get a little better... a little human... and then _this psycho leech_.

Jacob pushed off the counter and took a slinking step toward the wolf whose eyes subtly widened.

"She didn't want you to-... She's the-...I couldn't-...She said it would tear you up if-..." his words started tumbling over themselves, in a frantic jumble.

"Shh," Jacob crooned pushing a wave of heated compulsion over him.

"**Paul, you will not.**"

He laced the word with thick, viscous, _incontrovertible _order as he crossed the few steps to where Paul was subtly swaying on his feet as the mandate swaddled him.

Jacob clapped a warm hand on his shoulder, steadying him, soothing him with touch. The wolf's shoulders instantly relaxed under his Alpha's hand.

Jacob had thought she might do something like this in her desperation - coming off the cortisone high of dealing with_ his shit_ and then facing what was ahead of her. Bella had always been so _fiercely _protective of him and her friends that sometimes it could make her be reckless and rash. Like she'd been here. Because if she'd thought this thing through, she never would have asked: it would scar Paul irreparably to kill the first person who'd touched his heart, leech or not.

And Paul was her brother now too.

A bittersweet smile of gratitude softened Jacob's lips as he looked into each of the wolf's ebony eyes with his sincerity.

"Thank you," he whispered. "For taking care of her."

Paul set his jaw as he nodded minutely.

Jacob's eyes darted between his for a moment - cataloging the subtle relief, the heartache, the fear - and then his hand fell back to his side.

Jacob's own heart was hemorrhaging, but he'd have to lock it away. He needed to turn this thing around and ramp them all on up for this war. Losing just wasn't an option and if he had to stab a knife into his own chest and excise his heart to keep the ruthless stone cold focus he needed to have, he'd do it.

Just like he'd done this whole year.

Blowing a breath out of his cheeks, he spun on his heel and paced quickly back to the phone. "_If_ that happens," he growled as he picked up the receiver and started punching numbers. "That's _my job_." (And he sure as hell would make certain she got in a bite along the way.)

He brought the receiver to his ear as he turned back to his wolf with heating eyes - Paul was caught between his own heart and rage too.

"_BUT_ that's never gonna fucking happen, P," he laughed darkly, doing what he could to pull him over the lip and into to the fire.

Paul's signature smirk ventured out as he shook his head slowly in agreement and Jacob watched rage visibly ignite and consume, squaring his shoulders and jaw.

As dominants, this was something that was so much easier for the both of them - it was clear-cut and physical and wild.

War.

As the phone rang in his ear a humorless smile of pure, savage relish stretched his lips. "And the only ones doing any dying today are already dead."

"Well, they're gonna be deader," Paul growled.

'

'

'_BELLA!'_

Bella jumped with a little squeak that made the car shimmy on the road. She readjusted her white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel as Jacob's warmth flooded over her with the conscious relaxing of her guard.

It was the third time she'd done this in half an hour: allowed anxiety's noose to constrict her connection with him.

'_Honey, you have to stay open. I'm here, just a few miles away.' _The words were woven with the deep resonant power of his other form; Jacob was running as wolf.

But he was trying to keep instinct at bay and bring his humanity to the surface as much as possible, shielding her from the rage she knew was eating him alive. She could _feel_ his mental walls standing tall, monolithic and heated - as if a fire burned behind them - giving her tunnel vision into only part of him.

That was okay, because she was doing the same thing too. She was trying to spare him from seeing just how freaking frightened she was right now (and how much she really just wanted to turn the car around and run into his arms).

Especially now that Cliff's Dive was just about a minute away around the next bend. "The Dive" was an infamous run-down bar near the bluffs and pointedly far out of the wolves' territory. But she was glad it was always busy serving the desperate and addicted because it would be a public place even at a Monday noon.

As she turned the bend, she sat up more in the luxury leather seat that might as well have been a bed of nails. Her hand automatically slipped down to her thigh and rubbed over the thin metal ridge in her front pocket for comfort. Bella was a planner too, and she wouldn't walk into this thing without a little last-ditch scheme. She just knew that, stories and past lives and all things considered, she couldn't tell Jacob right now. It would make him suffer even more.

She couldn't bear that she was making him suffer.

_Remember why you're doing this, Bella._

Memories of that ill-fated phone call flashed through mind – of calling her dad, and getting the vampire who'd taken him. She'd told James she was alone and for a moment she had actually thought she was… until she remembered.

She _wasn't_ alone anymore.

She'd frantically reached out and Jacob had been at her side in an instant. With calming warmth he'd mentally talked her through every step of that phone call: what to ask, what to say. But when James had given her the "proof of life" she'd requested and her father had come on the line, it was obvious that he was in pain. And afraid.

Bella had been very, very wrong: her father _did_ know the meaning of love. Not only had he had faith in them both all along, just like Jake, he'd rather die than see her come to harm. Well, she'd die for them both happily too.

But that _wasn't_ going to happen.

"It's-not-gonna-happen, it's-not-gonna-happen, it's-not-gonna-happen," Bella repeated the words over and over like a mantra and sat up sat up stiffly as the rusty garish sign came into view up ahead.

'_Bells!'_

"Sorry," she whispered aloud and relaxed again.

It was hard to stay open like this - all her life when the going got tough she'd just withdrawn into herself to deal with it. And no matter how thoroughly his love had transformed her in mere days, old habits died hard. As Jacob had so poignantly pointed out, she might have leaned on him, but she'd never really let him in.

Until now.

_Now_, she'd invited him into her heart, her soul, her body. Now, she had a best friend and lover and mate. Now she had a wolf who would always stand at her side

At those thoughts, she could feel a low lupine purr of approval wind through her mind - that's all the animal wanted: just to hear her voice, feel her touch, curl at her feet and keep her safe every moment of every day.

Today that wasn't possible.

Today, she was turning into a parking lot that was sprinkled with beat up cars like fleas. Bella bit her lip and flicked it with her tongue as she drove over the crunching gravel and turned into a parking stall at the edge of the lot.

Jacob was sending soothing calming heat through their connection, but she could feel his own tension jack up - those mental walls were suddenly not only hot but sparking and electric.

'_Jake, stop the ju-ju,'_ she sent silently as her hand automatically flew to the steering column. She knew she had to be "emotionally authentic" if this was going to work and that meant, in this case, _scared off her ass._

Jacob's power slowly withdrew like the tide, leaving her high and dry with her terror and freaking emotionally authentic to the extreme.

'_Deep breaths,' _he soothed.

Indeed, Bella hadn't been breathing at all and at his prompting, dutifully gasped in a lungful of air. Suddenly she also realized her hand had been heedlessly swiping at the steering column, looking for her keys. With a roll of her eyes, she petulantly pushed that dashboard button and the car turned off with an anticlimactic sigh.

Hunching her shoulders up to her ears while she bit the hell out of her lip, Bella sat silently in the car… afraid to look.

This was it.

'_Remember they can scent a lie so tell the truth as much as you can,_' Jacob's voice was velvet and calm – even though she knew he was screaming inside_. 'If they ask you if you're alone, mentally reframe it like your dad did: alone in the car, alone for a mile, whatever.'_

They.

Somehow Jacob with his mad Alpha skills had figured out that James still wasn't working alone, even though the Pack had Edward. In fact he thought it was...

A brisk knock against the window made Bella spring across the front seat with a shriek. Her eyes snapped to the driver's side window where Alice Cullen was waving brightly with a blithe smile.

Jacob had been right.

Taking a deep breath as her heart lunged from its stall into a sprint, she scooted back across the seat and opened the door.

"Hi, Bella!" she greeted cheerily.

Bella's brow dipped as she nervously wiggled her fingers in reply. Maybe Jacob had been wrong and the Cullens were going to help?

"So we're going in my car," she informed her breezily, pulling the door open wider.

"Go where?" Bella asked in a scratchy whisper as she turned in the seat and cautiously hung her legs out.

"To see James, silly," she grinned. "Or did you just stop by for a beer?" The following bell-like giggles at her own joke were nothing short of macabre.

Bella could only nod as she shakily pushed to her feet - it was all so strange. But then so was Alice.

"Phone," she prompted holding out a pert hand.

Bella swallowed thickly as she dug it out of her jeans pocket and handed it over. She rubbed her hands on her thighs, neurotically making sure her little secret weapon was still safely tucked in her front pocket. The vampire flipped it open and deftly scrolled through the menus on the ancient phone.

"Good! You didn't call or text," Alice smiled at her like she was a well-behaved child. And then promptly crushed her the device in her fist with a crunch.

Letting the plastic shards tinkle to the gravel, her strange yellow eyes squinted at her. "You don't have another, right? No GPS?"

"No," Bella whispered.

Alice cocked her head and then smiled blindingly again. "Good!" she piped. "Let's go!" With that, the diminutive vampire turned on her heel and nearly skipped across the parking lot.

"I think you'll like James – he's really nice," she was saying.

Bella wrapped her arms around her middle and took slow steps after.

"This is going to be so _fun_!" Suddenly Alice whipped around with a little hop, slapping gleeful hands to her sides. "I saw we're going to be great friends. And we can go shopping for your dress as soon as you feel better."

The vampire turned back around, completely ignoring Bella's incredulous squint. She wrapped her arms around her stomach tighter. Alice's sprightly cheer juxtaposed with being led to her death was like something out of a Tim Burton film.

'_She's nuts, Bells,' _Jacob's voice was thin and cracking. Blinking, she realized he was barely keeping it together he was so angry. His indignant rage actually made the torture a little more bearable.

'_I'm okay, honey,' _she sent back as she walked dutifully around the side of some fancy Beemer sport car.

She stiffly lowered herself into the passenger seat as Alice slid jauntily in on the other side.

"Ready?" Alice beamed, turning with sparkling eyes. Bella searched her face carefully; she really _did_ think that Bella should be happy about this. Same as Edward, she only saw what she wanted to see.

_It was freaky._

'_Psycho nutcase,' _Jacob provided.

Alice plopped on a pair of (unneeded) sunglasses and turned over the engine. Revving it dramatically, she tossed Bella a gratified smirk. "I love this car."

With that they were spinning out in reverse, throwing a wake of tumbling gravel, before they lunged out onto the road.

Bella groaned as she braced her hands on the door.

"See what I mean?" Alice giggled. "Love, love, _love _it!"

'_Keep your eyes on the road, Bells so we know where you're going,'_ Jacob crooned soothingly. _'We're right behind you. Try to get whatever kinda info you can while you' got the chance.'_

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth and leaned back rigidly against the seat as her eyes scanned the road.

"Is my dad okay?" she breathed, starting with the most important thing.

"Charlie's _fine_," Alice clucked dismissively. "I mean he fell and broke his leg, but we'll take him to the hospital just as soon as you get turned."

She glanced over at Bella with a grin and excited shrug of her shoulders.

"Why are you doing this?" Bella sniffed with a little disbelieving shake of her head.

"Well," Alice began pertly as she readjusted her hands on the wheel. "My brother has been waiting for 109 years for you, Bella." She looked over with a smile, even as she navigated the twists and turns of the winding cliff-side road. "And he deserves to be happy."

"But what about me, Alice?" she asked quietly.

"Oh you deserve to be happy too," the vampire quickly added, as she returned her eyes to the road. "And you will be. _Very happy._ I saw your wedding with Edward - we're going to find a gorgeous dress and we'll have hundreds and hundreds of flowers and-..."

"Alice, I don't _want _to marry Edward," she interrupted.

Alice glanced at her again, those dark glasses obscuring what Bella was pretty sure was irritation. "Well see, you've got it all wrong," she pouted. "I've _seen _it - you're _happy_, you go on a honeymoon in Brazil and then we all live as one big fami-"

"Alice!" Bella interrupted, panic starting to constrict her chest at the thought of being trapped in that life. "You've got the wrong girl, or the wrong fairy tale or maybe the wrong life - I don't know," her gaze swept the dash as if she could find some kind of sense to it all.

"I'm in love with _someone else!_"

The words exploded from her lips in desperation - she could handle going to her death, but she couldn't handle imagining a life without Jacob.

"Oh yeah, the dog," Alice snorted derisively. "That was a _mistake_ - I don't know how it happened," she mused, as if the thought was disturbing.

"But I'm sure it will get fixed as soon as you're one of us!" The sentence gained momentum until it exploded back into excitement. "And Bella, we're going to have _so much fun! _We'll be sisters...shopping, traveling the world... oh! there's this beautiful waterfall in the Amazon-..."

Bella was starting to lose it.

"Alice that's not me! I _hate_ shopping!" she shrieked. "I just want a simple life with friends and family! What you're talking about... that's not who I am!"

Alice glanced at her with an annoyed purse of her lips. "You'll be who we want you to be and you'll enjoy it," she bit out crisply. "I'm not going to let you ruin this, Bella."

It was the first thing she'd said that actually sounded real.

And it was like a slap of sobriety.

Suddenly Bella realized she'd been blocking Jacob out again and she frantically relaxed back against the seat. Like he'd held his breath for 10 minutes, Jacob's thoughts gushed over her mind in a torrent of worry.

'_**Where are you?!' **_

Bella blinked and looked around at the scenery flashing by. They were on some back road through an anonymous wood - she didn't know when Alice had turned off the main road that wound around the cliffs.

"Where are we?" Bella gasped quietly.

Alice turned to her with a sly smile. "It's a secret," she tipped down her glasses with prissy fingers and gave her a stage wink. "We'll be there in just a few minutes."

"No, I mean when did we turn off highway 113?" she asked, as casually as she could.

Alice glanced at her suspiciously. "Why?"

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth. "I just don't like surprises," she ventured in a little voice.

"Oh but you _will_!" Alice chirped brightly, apparently convinced by her lame performance. "You're going to _love_ your surprise birthday part-..." she clapped her hand over her mouth theatrically. "Oops," she giggled, returning both hands to the wheel.

'_It's okay, Bells,'_ Jake's voice was like breath of fresh air. _'We've gotta be close. Just try to find a landmark.'_

Bella nodded stupidly to the mental voice and then quickly glanced at Alice.

The vampire gave her an unfettered cheery smile.

Swallowing thickly, Bella kept her gaze panning the woods around them as she settled back against the seat.

"So where is Edward?" she asked quietly. Of course, she knew the Pack had him, but she wanted to know if she knew that.

'_Good one,'_ Jake approved.

"Aww, you miss him don't you?" the vampire gave her a sappy smile. "He'll be along as soon as I call him. I just want to get you safe to James first."

Bella licked her lips. "No, I mean, why isn't he with us?"

"Oh!" she chirped, perking up in her seat. "Well my visions are all gummed up because of the dogs - so I was getting irritated," she wrinkled her nose. "After you met James at the diner, Edward told me what the two of them had planned. I thought it was a _great_ idea… 'cause it was," she gushed, flashing Bella an awed smile. "It would get things back on track lickety-split so I wanted to help. It was James who figured out the mutts were planning something sneaky."

Bella's gaze snapped to Alice's profile. "How?" she asked with a furrowed brow.

Alice gave her a carefree ragdoll shrug. "But he said I could help him secretly while Edward went along with it to throw the dogs off the scent," she cut her eyes at Bella from over her glasses. "Pun intended." Pealing giggles tinkled through the car.

Squeezing her eyes shut Bella swallowed the bile in the back of her mouth and checked her connection with Jacob.

'_I'm here, you're doin' good, honey,'_ he reassured her in buttery tones. But even though he tried to hide it, she could taste the bitter tang of his worry in his reassurance.

He still didn't know where she was.

Bella sat up in her seat, frantically scanning out all windows. The car was currently climbing some kind of hill but there as not a sign or stone outcropping or vista to go by. Just trees.

_All these freaking trees look the same! _

"We're almost there!" The statement swooped up with excitement along with the rise in the road.

The tourniquet around Bella's chest wound several twists tighter. She felt like she could hear Jacob's whooping pants as he pounded through the forest while her own breath was shallow and rapid over her lips.

She sat up a little more as the car crested the rise and… there! Laid out in front of them was finally a landscape - a valley and huge body of water.

'_OZETTE LAKE!' _Jacob yelled.

Howls exploded through her head with a tinny vibration Bella was sure Alice could hear. But a glance at the vampire found her watching the road with a cock to her head and a pleased smile.

Jacob's words were brusque and focused. _'We know where you are, we're coming.' _

'

'

"Sweep all around you honey, that's it," Jacob murmured the same words aloud that he mentally sent to his mate, walking helpless and alone into a viper's lair. They were downwind and less than a mile away from where the witch had brought her.

He squeezed his eyes closed as he pulled up his shorts, fierce attention gulping down every last detail:

_A modern lodge on the lake, no... boathouse._

_It was remote and sequestered down in a gulch banked on one side by the lake._

_Looming 40 foot rock walls rose up on two sides where the glacier had cut into the mountain. _

_The road along the lake was the only way in._

_It was upwind. _

_This was the perfect bunker._

"FUCK!" Jacob spat, slamming his hand into the nearest object which luckily was a tree. Panting through his nose, he licked his lips and squeezed his eyes closed again.

_Concentrate, fucker._

They would storm the place if they had to, but James had made sure that he'd have plenty of warning. He'd have enough time to kill both humans _and _make his escape in the lake.

"Bells, look behind the building," he whispered, while his mate stalled as long as she could in the car. Her eyes obediently scanned the area behind the boathouse.

"Good, honey. Get out of the car and look up at the northwest cliff."

'_Which way is northwest?'_ Even her mental voice was small and afraid.

Gritting his teeth over his growl Jacob slammed the tree again, teetering on breaking bones. Something about the innocence of her question swiftly gutted his heart.

_Good, it was better that way._

"It's the one to the right of the car, honey. Behind the trees," he murmured, as he tried to keep his thoughts calm and even.

"_Bella, c'mon! They're waiting!"_ That witch's voice was like the god-awful sound of a wet finger on crystal. It hurt his ears even through Bella's thoughts.

Bella slowly got out of the car, her eyes sweeping the landscape behind the structure.

The cliff was about 45 feet high, just downwind enough, but fuck, 100 feet back from the building and too far to jump.

"The trees honey," he breathed. "Look at the trees."

Suddenly Bella was painfully yanked by a cold stone hand on her wrist and she cried out.

Jacob's eyes popped open with a vicious snarl.

Paul and Sam froze half-way up from pulling up their own shorts. Jacob's gaze focused on his Pack mates as his teeth lifted in wordless fury. They both straightened slowly in unison, identical concern etching their faces.

"That bitch nearly broke her arm," Jacob spat.

Sympathetic wrath rumbled in low growls from the two men.

But then Bella was faithfully looking at the trees. Jacob's eyes snapped shut as he studied the landscape: a small copse of tall white pines between the cliff and the building. His feet started moving before the plan had even coalesced in his mind.

"Now look at the roof, baby," he crooned, hearing his wolves fall in behind him without question as he sprinted through the wood.

"That's it!" He ground the words between his molars like sand. "Sam, Paul, this is what we're gonna do..."

'

"Do you know what he's going to do, Alice?" Bella whispered as she rubbed her wrist and followed the vampire toward the large building. It looked like some kind of newish wooden warehouse - big and boxy, with a roof three stories tall.

"He's going to turn you," Alice piped, reaching out and grabbing Bella's hand again. She squeezed it collegially and a little too hard. One of the tendons popped and Bella grimaced.

"Oops!" she loosened her grip, swinging their clasped hands between them with a jovial smile. "I keep forgetting how fragile you are. You'll like being one of us - we don't break."

Bella licked her lips. "Do you know he tried to rape me?" she breathed.

Alice gave her a frown as she flipped her sunglasses up on her head. "He said Edward got it all wrong," she chuckled like it was all some big joke. "But I made him promise not to hurt you anyway."

Alice truly didn't know what kind of monster she was working for. She was myopically focused on getting Edward his mate and them all living happily ever after.

A low groan of pain had Bella's eyes snap to the building ahead of her.

"Dad!" she pulled free of the vampire's marble hand and started running. There was a large barn-like entrance that was closed and a smaller double door.

"This way," Alice trilled, and in a supernatural instant was ahead of her and pulling open the door.

Bella pushed brusquely past the woman and then froze inside the cavernous room. Blinking frantically her eyes struggled to adjust to the dim light.

It was one huge room lit only by the light of an overcast afternoon filtering through skylights three stories up. It was silent except for the sound of water sloshing from the far end of the room – the back wall opened and was built over the lake. It was a boathouse - several canoes and kayaks hung from the wall and two hulking schooners were looming on blocks near the watery exit.

'_Bella,'_ Jacob's words were tense, urgent. _'Look up again.'_

Bella did as she was told, sweeping the murky ceiling.

"I'm so glad you could make it, girl," a soft laugh sifted through the gloom.

Bella whipped around as her breath caught and unraveled like a sweater.

An alabaster figure that seemed to glow in the dim light, stepped out from behind one of those beached schooners: James. Her father was yanked up against his side by an arm around his throat and being dragged heedlessly along. One of his legs dangled limply, the other pushed against the ground on tip-toe. Charlie's wide eyes were locked on her, his mouth soundlessly opening and closing like a fish on dry land.

Bella's gaze snapped back up to his captor. A slow soulless smile stretched pallid lips while those flat eyes flitted provocatively up and down her body.

Bella's mouth opened, but nothing came out. Finally she pushed the words free in nothing more than a wheeze:

"Let him go."

Without a word, the monster cocked his head like an insect and grandly swept both arms open wide.

Charlie crumpled to the ground with a coughing moan of pain.

"Dad," Bella gasped taking a stumbling step toward him.

"Bells," he rasped, frantically pushing up to his hands. One leg scrabbled against the floor the other was bent at a very wrong angle. "Oh, baby, you shouldn't a come..." His face was pale and streaked with tears.

Bella's hand flew over her mouth as hot tears of her own instantly welled; she'd never seen her father cry in her life.

"Hi Charlie!" A cricket voice piped from behind her. "Hi James. See? I told you she'd come." She sounded proud of herself and if made Bella's stomach turn. "This is the exact building where I saw you bite her." Her eyes darted around the room with a satisfied smile.

"Alice you were right, my dear," an affable voice made Bella's eyes jerk up to see if she'd missed someone else.

It was someone else, alright.

Like he'd yanked a latex mask over his head, James was now someone entirely different. A broad smile, sensitive eyes, hands folded casually in front of him – he was a paragon of geniality.

"But you're _always _right, aren't you?" he chuckled with a coy little smile.

"Well I have an unfair advantage," tinkling giggles spilled across the room like a handful of tiny sleigh bells.

A low grunting moan shuffled under them and Bella's eyes darted down to where her father was panting as he struggled to get up.

James nodded solicitously, as he idly kicked the man's arm out from under him, making Charlie fall face-first into the floor. He took a step in front of her father, pointedly screening him. He needn't have bothered; Alice was so wrapped up in her ego - and how James was feeding it - she didn't even glance down.

"So my dear," James crooned. "Why don't you go fetch that handsome brother of yours while I prepare his bride,"

Clapping her hands together, she turned to Bella. "I'm so excited," she piped. "Finally it's time!"

Alice bounded forward, grasping Bella's shoulders before she could even react. She bit her lip on the bruising pain.

"Oh Bella, it's going to be so wonderful, just you wait and see!" she gushed. "Like James said, I'm _never_ wrong."

Bella's eyes were frantic as they flitted over her face. "Don't leave us," she gasped. At least Alice seemed to make James _pretend _to be a human being.

"Oh, I'll be back," she reassured her with a playful pinch of her chin (it would leave a mark). "With Edward. James won't hurt you, he promised."

"That I did," he jumped in and assured her solemnly. "Her father is here to keep me honest." James glanced behind him with a smile. "But I'll go ahead and start things for Edward and I'm afraid there's no helping that part of it," he turned back to them with pained regret furrowing his face. "Edward will be back after the worst of it has passed – it would be hard for him…" his voice dolefully faded on the words.

Bella had never seen a vampire have so many expressions - the rest of them couldn't pull it off.

Alice nodded soberly and then met Bella's eyes as she clasped her hands behind her back. "The first part is a little bit..." she wrinkled her nose. "_Hard_. But it's sooo worth it in the end."

She turned back to James with a click of her heel. "That's very considerate of you," she nodded pertly.

"It's the _least _I could do for all you and your brother have done for me, Alice," James avowed with a theatrically furrowed brow. _"Thank you," _he sniffed with a sad purse of his lips. "Now I can lay my dear Victoria rest."

"Aww, I'm sorry," Alice frowned, sticking out her lip.

"It's alright," he looked up with a melting grief in sentimental eyes. "It makes it better to know I'm helping to bring Bella and Edward together." James' eyes darted to Bella for the first time since he'd started this charade. Like he'd flipped a switch, they turned flat and cold. "Their immortal happiness," he crooned, his voice carrying on the deception. "Will be a joyful memorial to her life."

His eyes clicked back into character and swept to Alice. "Hurry now – these two have been apart long enough."

Alice nodded eagerly and then glanced at Bella with a blinding smile. "See you on the other side!"

And with that she spun on her heel and flounced out into the afternoon. For a moment the overcast day spilled into the boathouse - as bright as sunlight - before it slowly retreated as the door groaned closed pushing dark icy dread back into place.

Bella wrapped her hands around her middle, simply unable to keep her chin from tucking as she turned slowly back to the vampire.

That cheap veneer had washed away from a coldness that screamed savagery. His animated eyes had died and were rotting as they were watching her with perverse relish.

"I just _love _that girl," he gushed breathlessly with a Cheshire cat grin as the car engine revved outside.

'_**ISABELLA!' **_

Jacob's voice burst through her brain, making her knees buckle at the explosion of pain like a migraine. Groaning, her hand clapped over her mouth as she vomited acid and then swallowed it back down. She had blocked him out again and he'd forcefully pushed his way through somehow.

"Don't faint on me, girl." James' desiccated laugh echoed off the ceiling and disintegrated into the gloom. "That would hardly be any fun."

"Please..." her father gasped hoarsely, having somehow moved to sit up with both legs out in front of him and pain etched in his face.

"Just leave her alone... I'll help you get Jake," he panted. "Promise. 'Fact I'll bet he'd give you whatever you want if you -..."

"**I want to WIN!"** The deafening words detonated with no warning as James snapped around and backhanded her father across the floor.

"_NO!"_Bella's scream followed like an echo as she started senselessly running to her father's aid.

'_**Bella STOP!' **_Jacob's voice rang forcefully through her mind.

She froze two strides into her sprint.

James spun back on her with eyes that finally showed some emotion: hate.

'_Honey, I'm gonna get you out of this but you gotta do exactly what I say.'_ Each word was intense and urgent, throwing a lifeline into the high seas of pure terror.

James took a jaunty step toward her as thin lips stretched back from soiled teeth in something that could never be mistaken for a smile.

Bella struggled to swallow as she incrementally straightened, captured by the smoldering cruelty that burned inside that gaze.

"I want to _win_…" he repeated, this time in a whisper. "And it looks like I have. Because he'd have _never_ let you come alone, eh girl? His little bitch?"

'_This is what we're going to do:' _Jacob's voice was calm and compelling like it was when he did something like teach her how to carve wood.

Patient, he'd always been so patient.

'_You need to lure him toward the far wall - away from your dad, away from the water,'_ he crooned. _'Can you do that?'_

She nodded numbly and James' lips flashed up from jagged teeth.

Blinking, she realized her gaffe as panic washed over her.

'_It's okay, he thinks your nod was for him,_' Jacob reassured her in clipped efficient tones._ 'Get him talking. Distract him. I need him to be as close as possible to the far wall.'_

Bella licked her lips.

The intensity melted away from Jacob's words. _'I'm here, Bells,"_ he soothed - deep, warm, kind. _'This is just another thing we're doing together, right?'_

Her father groaned back into consciousness from his silence and the combination was enough to remind her who she was.

In the face of a nightmare...

She wasn't helpless, she was strong. Strong enough to be many things so many people: Jake's best friend, her father's daughter, a Pack's sister, the Alpha's mate. She wasn't a victim, she was a woman who'd _chosen. _To stand by the ones she loved. To follow her heart.

To have faith.

"Why?" She asked suddenly with a purposeful lift of her chin.

James blinked in theatrical surprise like he was amazed she could talk.

"Why what?" he asked softly out of the corner of a smirk.

"Why did you win?" She tried to keep him focused on his ego as she took a subtle step back toward that far wall. She'd watched what he'd done with Alice and decided to try her hand.

She felt Jacob's rumbling approval ripple through her with warmth.

"Well," he chuckled like shock of dry leaves. "I have you, don't I?"

He tipped his head with a slow-spreading leer.

"And when I'm _finished_ with you," he stretched the words out with breathy relish. "He'll never forgive himself and go mad… _for real,_" he winked as he strode casually forward.

Bella's feet rooted to the spot like a mouse in a cobra's sites.

'_That's good for us, Bells,"_ Jacob's strength washed over her. _'He's not gonna act quickly. We can use it against him.'_

She drew in a deep shaking breath trying to dispel the press of dark memories. She was manipulating _him_ now, damn it... not the other way around.

"H-how did you figure it out?" she whispered, hating the shake in her voice.

'_It's okay,' _Jacob reassured her._ 'Keep backing up.'_

"Well..."

Bella took another step back as James made a point of casually stretching his arms with a luxuriant groan like was warming up for a workout.

"It was a brilliant plan, I'll give him that," he murmured distractedly as he began a leisurely stroll toward her.

HIs indolence laced with portent was terrifying … he'd perfected terrorism to an art. But Bella was good at observing and she was starting to realize it was a _calculated strategy_.

"But that's why this game was so fun," he shook his arms out and met Bella's eyes while she kept taking incremental steps back from his approach.

"What he didn't account for though," he sniffed a laugh. "Is that I never underestimate my enemies - and he's too good to go down that fast," he paused in his step, arching a brow. "In fact, I'm sorry this little game is over... he's the best I've ever had."

Then suddenly he cocked his head with an exaggerated frown. "Are you running away from me?"

Bella froze, pulling her lip into her mouth.

"Good," James' face transformed into a chilling smile. "Go ahead, it'll be fun..." he held out a cordial hand.

Taking a deep breath, her eyes slipped to the floor.

"Now that's better," he breathed, beginning his unhurried slink toward her again. He was only 20 feet away now and she could smell him. Bella clapped a reflexive hand over her nose.

'_What do I do, Jake?'_

'_Look up and see where you are - act like you're looking for the door.'_

Head tucked, Bella pretended to covertly look over her shoulder at the door, in the process she furtively craned up to -..."

"Looking for something?" The whisper was right in her ear.

With a shriek, Bella started to whip around but froze - James was standing right in front of her, leaning down so close she could smell his breath.

"Like the door, girl?" he breathed. "Want to make a run for it?"

Bella could hear the little ticks of her breath in her throat as it fluttered inside her chest like a moth against a window pane.

'_Honey, tell him no.'_ Jacob was trying _so hard _to keep his words soothing, serene, but she could feel him unravelling… just like her.

This was too much for him.

Bella shook her head minutely and heard the crinkle of the leech's smile. He wasn't breathing but the scent of his mouth was repulsive: like rotting meat.

Her eyes cut over at him with little jerking movements. Those lifeless eyes were watching her carefully with a cold amusement crinkling the corners and lifting thin lips from wicked teeth.

"But _you_ didn't disappoint did you?" he drawled in a corn-husk whisper as a finger came up to stroke over her hair.

Bella's eyes snapped shut simply because it was the only thing she could do, and she had to do something. She felt helpless.

'_Oh, God, Bells.'_ Jacob was _trying_ to send her comfort but it was coughing and stuttering. He was seconds away from losing it. All her life, Jacob had stood at her side like her rock, her anchor. Strong and sure when she couldn't be. This last year he'd done _nothing_ but take care of others and be strong when they couldn't be too.

Now it was Bella's turn.

'_How far, Jacob?'_ She knew that quick mind had seen the sweep of the ceiling that her own frightened brain hadn't been able to process.

'_Twenty feet.'_

"Leave her alone," a feeble voice moaned quietly, making Bella's eyes blink open. "_Please_ - I'll help you."

James glanced over his shoulder with a patronizing smile and then turned back to her, searching her eyes. His hand was still stroking her hair.

"I knew I could count on my _brave little martyr_," he whispered softly, his fingers raking through her hair. "To save her daddy."

"_Oh, baby girl,"_ her father gasped in hoarse lament. His pain and desperation was overrunning his self-possession. "Please!"

"You will shut up now, old man," James hissed, releasing her as he whipped around. "There are many bones in a human body to break, and she's just so… very… fragile."

She heard her father's soft sobs escape through his nose around lips clamped closed.

There had been far too much pain.

Her mate's protective instinct was whittling away his sanity by the second, her father was helpless and suffering. This monster was hurting, torturing... slowly _murdering _the two most important men in her life.

There was a fine line between terror and rage.

Bella stepped over it.

'_I'm going to get him to that side of the room,'_ she sent her mate with determined heat.

Because if she was going to die in this thing, she was certainly going to do it where Jake could take him out after.

Bella wanted to win too.

'_How much warning do you need?' _ She guessed he was somehow making his break on that side.

'_Five seconds.'_ His mind was buckling and burning in the inferno stoked by her thoughts.

James turned back to her and Bella pressed her lips into a straight line as she looked up at a monster inches away, staring down at her with soulless black eyes ringed with crimson blood.

'_Do you trust me Jake?'_

Her mate hesitated for just a second - he knew both what she was asking and what it meant.

'_Yes.'_

'_Then wait for my signal.'_ And with that she cut their connection; it was just too much for them both.

Bella's eyes darted out past the vampire and she called: "Trust I'm doing what's best for you, dad." She threw his own words from the car back at him in the hopes he got the message.

Then she returned her gaze to the vampire whose eyes were flitting over her face with interest.

"Are you going to kill him?" she asked quietly.

Drawing in an audible breath, James pursed his lips and straightened. "No."

Bella's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

"See, I'm merciful," he sniffed and his eyes started wandering over her body.

Her hands snaked around her middle for comfort.

"But," he murmured as his hand reached out purposefully.

Bella reflexively flinched away and his eyes snapped to hers. "He's going to wish I had," he breathed through a lazy smile. "After watching how much fun I have with his little girl."

His hand emphatically gathered the shock of curls falling over her shoulder and Bella put everything she had into not shrinking away.

His gaze locked with hers as he leaned over and took an indulgent inhale of the locks. "Front row seats, old man!" he called theatrically out to the room.

_Fear. This was a strategy, a game. _

He _wanted _her to be afraid.

Those cold fish eyes slithered over her face, reading those thoughts and his lips hitched up on one side as he leaned in closer. "I wish this weren't the end, really I do," he whispered by her ear as he started to wind the handful of hair around his fist.

Bella bit her lip, trying to stem the tide of rising panic.

"But I'm smart enough to quit while I'm ahead," he bit out, yanking her head to the side with such force that it dislodged both a gasp and her arms from her stomach.

"I had a head start with the mind-reader but..." he chuckled icily as he leaned slowly down to her neck. "The animal's goooood."

He paused, inhaling and pulling cold air over her skin.

"I don't know if I'd get this chance again," he breathed and then licked his tongue, clammy and rough, up the side of her neck.

Bella caged her terror in tense muscles as she curled her hands into fists.

With a disgustingly prurient groan, he tugged her closer by her hair as a hand slithered around her waist.

She was trapped and he was losing control –she had to get her head in the game or she was going to run out of time.

"Why? Because he's better than you?" Bella disparaged quietly with much less bravado than she'd have liked. "You can't outsmart him?"

But the words still produced their desired effect. James jerked back with a flash of indignation.

"Well I have you, don't I?" he arched a brow with a slow sallow curve of his lips as he unwound her hair from his fist. "In the middle of a play that must have been..." he cocked his head as his finger came up to her cheek. "So very hard," he breathed as he watched the stone tip trace down her jaw. "So very hard to let you go."

"Like Victoria?" Bella whispered. "Was it hard to let her go, James?"

James rolled his eyes with a disinterested snort as he pulled back. Straightening, his gaze slipped off to the side. "Victoria was nothing but a good fuck now and again. This was never about her," he chuckled darkly. His eyes snapped back to hers. "Did you know I watched?"

Bella's brow furrowed in confusion even as she took a tiny step back.

His eyes fluttered closed as his yellow teeth bit down on a gratified smile. "I _watched_ him kill her. So _savage_. So _raw_," his eyes popped open with perverse delight.

"And then I knew he was the one I'd been looking for," he whispered. "An actual _rival_. You don't know how boring it is most of the time." He shook his head with a little patronizing laugh.

Bella was pretty much shocked speechless. Somehow she'd found comforting that at least he'd cared enough to avenge his mate.

"And you're just the fringe benefit," he leered as he reached out and fingered the collar of her shirt flannel. With a curious cock of his head, he pushed the material back over the deep bruise Jacob had left at the crook of her neck. He studied it a moment and then returned to her eyes with the second real emotion she'd seen in those pits of nothingness: lust.

"I smell him all over you... _in_ you," he whispered as he took a step toward her, his eyes intense and hungry. "You finally let him fuck you... " He leaned forward so that his mouth was by her temple. "Several times," he breathed. "Was it good?"

Bella was used to the whole freaking world knowing she'd had sex by now, so she was decidedly unphased. "No it wasn't," she said clearly. "It was _fucking awesome_."

James jerked back with undisguised surprise at her gall. It melted into an oily bravado.

"I'm better," he crooned, but his eyes lit to the challenge.

Bella rolled her eyes as her lips hitched in a wry little smile. She bit out each word: "There is. _no. way_."

James stared at her a moment, the slightest pucker appearing between his brows and it was then that Bella knew she had him.

Suddenly he threw his head back and barked a laugh that rang through the cavernous building. He looked back down with amused crescent eyes.

"I can see why he likes you little one," he murmured under his breath. "You've got… _spunk." _ He wrinkled his nose sarcastically and then started a slow slink around her, his eyes brazenly raking over her body.

Bella kept her gaze forward as she set her jaw - she'd riled him up alright, but that fire in his eyes was frightening.

"We've got time," he crooned as he circled her. "I'm sure the dogs have ripped the mindreader into ribbons by now," he laughed openly. "It ought to keep those _upstanding_ _Cullens_ busy for a while."

He stopped in back of her, and Bella squeezed her eyes shut.

"We can start out slow and then take it from there," he whispered provocatively. A hand slithered over her hip and she felt him lean down over her shoulder. "I'll bet I can make you cum," he breathed by her ear.

Her stomach tried to turn itself inside out and Bella bit her lip against her body's violent reaction. He stepped in so close she could feel his body against hers as that hand slipped around front to caress her stomach.

It started bucking in rebellion.

_Oh my God._ She had to find some way to get her distance.

"How would that be?" he crooned breathily. "Indelibly locked in that pretty little head for your immortality?"

And there was her chance.

"You're going to turn me?!" she shrieked spinning away from him.

James tipped his head. "Eventually," he mused, pretending to give the idea actual thought. "But first things first..." And in a preternatural instant he was inches away again.

"Wait!" Bella stopped him quickly with a hand on his chest. "Can I have one last request?" She squinted up at him. "P-please?"

His lips curved in a callous smile. "Depends on what it is."

"Well I... um... _Jake _lets me do it," she shamelessly fingered his ego as her eyes dipped to the floor.

With a soft sniff of interest, James took a step back, crossing his arms over his chest as his head listed curiously. "What?"

Bella drew in a breath through her nose. "Take off my own clothes," she expelled the words in a whisper to the floor. She'd never been so grateful for a corroborating blush in her whole life.

There was silence for a moment, while Bella's poor overworked heart pounded anxiously in her chest. If he didn't take the bait, she had no idea what else to do.

Finally she heard his indulgent raspy chuckle. "You're going to give me a show?"

Hope charged through icy veins as Bella bit her lip. She looked up from under her lashes... while she slipped her hand into her pocket.

James was regarding her with something like... anticipation. Somewhere along the way this had become less about Jacob and more about her. Another conquest.

Greedy eyes ran down her body and then met her eyes. "Like I said, I'm not merciless..." Then he jerked his chin in assent.

Bella gained another backward step toward that hallowed end of the room. Hitched her shoulder up to an ear shyly, she turned away from him. Palming the knife from her pocket, her eyes squeezed shut in mortification as she bent over to untie her chucks... at the waist.

At his shuffling laugh, Bella opened her eyes to see the vampire's feet circling behind her admiring her bottom - and her calculated distraction.

Bella's teeth danced on drawing blood from her lip as she quickly pulled open her pocket knife. At the same time she opened her mind to her lover briefly to give him warning as her eyes glanced up at the target skylight glowing dully in the gloom like the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.

It seemed so freaking far away.

Swallowing nervously, she slipped the blade up her flannel sleeve, feeling the prickling bite against her skin, and then her nervous fingers started fumbling with the laces.

But when a hand caressed over her behind she squeaked and crouched down.

"Please... just let me do this," she quavered, wishing she was faking the tremor in her voice.

But it fed the monster's arrogance. Deep ugly chuckles bubbled and popped like boils as he slunk around to her front to where she was frantically untying her sneakers.

She burst up to her feet, stumbling backward as she kicked off one and then other, gaining several frantic steps back from that predatory grin. And closer to her goal.

"Why so shy, girl?" he crooned.

Bella's heart had hermetically sealed her throat as she looked up into eyes that were ruthless, focused, craving.

Like the eyes of a cobra right before its final strike.

"Hurry," the word was bloated and husky as he started prowling toward her.

Bella took huge corresponding steps back. "I-I thought you said we had time-.." she challenged feebly.

"There's not time enough in the world for all I want to do to you," he hissed quietly, his eyes locking on hers like a heat seeking missile. "I just wish you weren't so delicate, because I'm afraid you just won't last..." His words were swallowed by a wicked smile.

Without a doubt, his patience was quickly evaporating and so was Bella's time. There would be no second chances.

Her hands flew up to her shirt's buttons, as she stumbled back away from him. His eyes snapped like lasers on her hands and Bella pulled the shirt open at her chest to expose her tank top, using the distraction to glance over her shoulder. Almost there.

Suddenly a cold hand slipped roughly over her breast and Bella shrieked jerking away from that repulsive touch. "Wait!"

"No," he whispered.

"Jake waits," she tried frantically as she ripped her shirt open the rest of the way, buttons popping and skittering across the cement floor.

"I don't," he breathed.

That's it: she'd run out of time. With a whimper, she struggled with her shirt as she fumbled with the blade, stuck in her sleeve.

The vampire laughed softly as he tipped his head to the side– his eyes were black holes that threatened to swallow her whole.

Finally tugging free of her shirt, Bella's every mental synapse screamed: **'JAKE NOW!' **

As James pounced.

'

Silence.

For the first time since Jacob's flesh had knotted and ripped away from cracking bones over a year ago, there was utter and complete silence in his head. Every phased wolf was tense and watching the scene being fed them by their Alpha.

He'd have liked to think it was simply a strategic decision - to show the Pack how the demon thought, what their sister was enduring - in case they didn't survive it... or in case they did.

But the truth was, he just couldn't do it alone.

And his wolves were beside him, gifting this silence along with the mooring of comfort and Pack. It was the only way he was able to survive it.

Because that new internal unity? It was blown to smithereens. His heart, his body, his mind – they were all ground zero in an apocalyptic war.

The wolf was rampaging with singing savagery that cauterized any connection to heart or head. It wanted nothing but bloody and indiscriminate carnage until the entire world was laid to waste and nothing could hurt his imprint again.

Even the strategic voice of reason - the Alpha in him that he was beginning to understand had access to lifetimes of wisdom - was brought to its knees. Paralyzed for the first time in its existence by the failures of the past, horrors of the present, and its terror at what the future would bring.

He _couldn't _lose her. Not again.

He was standing idly by and _watching._.

He was watching her _die_.

_Helplessly_.

It was only the man's heart that was shoring up his tattered sanity and keeping the berserker impulse on its strained and fraying leash… because she'd asked him to _trust_ her.

Just like he had two days ago.

Oh, Jacob _did_, like no one else on the planet, but the thing was, he didn't trust the devil. Because - make no mistake - that demon was none other than Satan himself. And Jacob's best friend and lover was facing him down alone.

Small.

Tender.

Human.

_He couldn't fucking bear it. _

His eyes popped open to the burning worried eyes of the grey wolf cowering on his haunches and Jacob realized he was he was foaming at the mouth with his soundless snarls. He roughly wiped his lips with a brusque forearm and it came back smeared with crimson froth. He was mercilessly mutilating the inside of his cheeks as he tried to silently cage his rage lest give their position away.

A callous laugh rang from that boathouse and Jacob's gaze snapped over the edge of the cliff.

_He couldn't stand any more. He just couldn't fucking stand it, he had to…_

'_Jay, you can't,'_ his Second's voice rippled through his mind, uncharacteristically soft, soothing. Leah was phased and running alongside Bella's truck on its way here. _'He's too close - he'll bite her or rip off her head before you can get to him.'_

Jacob slapped his palms over his face.

_He should have fucking done this when that monster was back by Charlie and she was safe. Fuck! _

'_He'd have gotten away, Jay…'_ Leah contradicted quietly leaving a million implications hanging silently on for the ride.

The leech would have killed her father and slipped into the lake mere feet away, only to rise again another day. Bella would have never forgiven him, but right now, he didn't care one fucking bit.

But it was a fate he would have happily taken over _this_.

Over losing her.

Jacob paced along the bluff, 25 feet from its lip (just enough of a runway to give his leap the momentum… he hoped) while he helplessly watched his lover bargain with the devil. Only snatches of their conversation drifted up to their preternatural ears, but when terror thinned her boundaries, tortuous scenes flickered through his mind. So that meant he'd seen the worst of it… and so had his Pack.

And that meant they all knew this wasn't some lover's vendetta, it was all about _Jacob_ and the game.

It was a revelation even more revolting than knowing the demon had sadistically watched his lover die, than understanding how much he craved suffering, than witnessing just how twisted and psychotic he really was.

_Never_ had Jacob hated what he was more.

A hand on Jacob's shoulder had him whip around with a silent flash of teeth.

Paul was now human and standing before him, eyes lowered, neck bared. Jacob had sent Sam down to the road as the wolf to ambush the building from that side when it was time.

"What," Jacob mouthed.

Paul leaned in. "Order me," he breathed in his ear.

Jacob pulled back with a furrowed brow.

"When I see 'em, there's no fucking way I'm gonna be able to stay in my skin." The words were ground by his molars into a quiet gravelly rumble.

Jacob returned the man's desperate incandescent stare for a moment - he knew how much Paul hated to be controlled, but here he was asking for it. _Begging_ for it.

And for the most difficult and painful of all commands.

It was a shocking request that dragged Jacob out of his own hell just enough. Something about it brought everything into focus: his Pack was a million percent behind him and they were in it to the bitter end, be it rescue or revenge.

Clapping a firm hand against Paul's neck, Jacob nodded once and then captured the wolf's eyes in heat. He watched the silent command ignite and consume those eyes until they rolled back into his head. Jacob caught him under the arms as his knees buckled under the weight of the Order.

Phasing was only topped by imprinting as the most resistant to command. Ordering it was like trying truss a hydrogen bomb - the pressure was unbearable for the man who'd been bound.

As Paul regained his footing - panting like he'd run a marathon - Jacob leaned in and rested his forehead against his. Those eyes snapped forward in surprise. Tenderly slapping the nape of his wolf's neck, Jacob shared breath for a moment.

"You're a good man, P," he whispered. "Bella's not the only one who thinks so."

With a final clap to the man's shoulder he pulled away, promptly turning his back on that stunned expression as his eyes panned the roof of the boathouse.

Suddenly a vision flashed through his mind as Bella briefly relinked their bond:

She was pretending to untie her shoe while she opened a pocket knife. It was the one he'd given her on her 12th birthday for his ill-fated attempts at teaching her how to carve.

Jacob's blood turned to ice, hissing and crackling in the fires of his rage, while inside the wolf howled. He knew what she planned to do. She was doing it again or she was mimicking the old stories or just being her usual reckless self when it came to protecting those she loved and it tore him up inside.

But the man hardly had time to worry or an ancient soul to mourn - this was the signal.

"Paul," Jacob hissed urgently, as he fell into a crouch like a sprinter in the blocks and fixed his eyes on the rise 25 feet away. "Two seconds behind me, no more, no less."

Without a word the man instantly congealed to the ground, mirroring his stance beside him.

"There's gonna be blood," Jacob whispered grimly - the last human words he could manage - as he clenched his jaw over the roar of the beast finally beating its way out of that buckling cage.

Rage poured forth like wildfire, consuming him.

'_**JAKE NOW!'**_

His feet were moving before he had consciously registered Bella's mental scream. In a blur, they pounded against the hard clay as he broke into sprint, faster and faster until…

He leaped.

Off a cliff and into the unknown,

Into battle

Into _the end_…

One way or another.

Like he was swimming, his feet kicked to keep his balance as his jump arced toward one of the tall pines halfway between the cliff and the building. He hit the tree with the rustle of needles as it bent with the momentum. The trunk groaned as it bowed under his weight, ferrying him closer… closer… to a rooftop still 40 feet away. At the first crack of wood, Jacob was springing, using the pine like a pole vaulter to flip up into the air. Legs snapped together and arms pulled in, as, with breakneck speed and deadly aim, he hurtled for the skylight, hoping she'd made it far enough back.

With a crash, his big body fell in a rain of glass and into a frozen moment of time:

A wild-eyed demon had his lover's forearm caged in an avid grip and his yellowed jagged teeth were poised inches away from her bloody wrist.

Bare toes had just touched concrete only several feet away, when his leg snapped out in a brutal roundhouse kick. It threw the creature's head back, tossing its body and dislodging its cold stone hands.

He lunged forward and swept his mate behind him in one fluid move as the bloodsucker congealed to his feet in a preternatural instant. In the next, Jacob had thrown a knife-hand strike to its head, followed by a spinning kick to the gut that violently pitched its body through the air with its infuriated shriek.

And right into Paul's immovable chest.

Landing in a crouch on the balls of his feet and fingertips, Jacob's head snapped up to find Bella.

Their eyes met and time simply stopped.

Sprawled where she'd fallen in the middle of a field of broken glass, her battered heart throbbed in a traumatized gaze while blood gushed from the jagged gash in her forearm. But at the mere sight of her - injured, but breathing and fixable – Jacob felt something snap back into place deep within him.

She was alive and he was here and there wasn't a fucking _thing in the world_ that could harm her now.

Like someone had pressed play again, the roar of chaos rushed back over him. Behind him, growls and hisses rolled and boiled while Charlie called out hoarsely to his daughter. Her eyes still locked on Jacob, she cried out as burly arms scooped her effortlessly up against a heaving chest. A big hand clamped over the gaping wound as a nude Sam darted back with his bundle and out of harm's way.

Sam would keep her safe.

Now it was time for some fucking revenge.

His face whipping around, Jacob's eyes burst into flame and locked like missile sites on his prey.

The leech was hissing and flailing like a hellion in Paul's steely grip. Inhuman snarls were ripping from the man's diaphragm as his wolf fought tooth and nail against his Alpha's restraint. Paul wouldn't be able to take much more.

"**MINE**!" Jacob roared, his body uncoiling like a spring as he leaped across the room.

In a preternatural flash, he'd ripped the leech from his Pack-mate's hold so violently it tore off one of the thing's arms, leaving it gruesomely wiggling in Paul's fist.

The demon's resulting screech was a cross between pain and fury and was like a million fucking fingernails on the biggest chalkboard in the world. With a grimacing growl, he grabbed a fistful of conveniently long hair and slammed its head into cement to shut it up. Again and again he smashed its face into the floor until it ceased that fucking God-awful sound and stopped uselessly struggling against his grip.

Breath heaving, Jacob flipped the battered monster over like a ragdoll and held it down with a fist at its neck and knee in its chest. Jacob's loathing gaze watched the mutilated features reform around eyes that were wry and resentful.

Jacob's lips lifted in a silent wicked snarl foaming with blood and spit and hate. All sound was burned off by the white-hot rage that begged to break free.

"I guess I underestimated you after a-…" his barely intelligible rasp was quickly suffocated by Jacob's constricting hand.

"You underestimated _her_, motherfucker," Paul snarled nearby, his voice more beast than human.

Jacob's face snapped up to find his wolf chomping at the bit as he swayed back and forth on eager feet. Jacob jerked his chin pointedly toward where Charlie was gasping in the far corner, pushed up on shaking arms. Both Paul and her father _needed_ to watch a little of this.

His gaze then darted back down to those heartless black holes staring up at him with cold hate. And this fucking parasite _needed_ to have a little taste of what it had done to _Jacob's mate_. It needed to know the feeling of pain, terror and desperation before it died.

And it would.

Jacob was going to teach him.

He was panting like a racehorse from the effort it took to keep himself in check, but he needed to do one last thing before he let the beast run.

With monumental effort, Jacob swallowed the knot of fire in his throat so he could push out human words.

"Get her out, Sam," he strained them through clenched teeth.

"I don't want her to see this."

'

Bella pressed her face further into the black fur, covering her ears against that shrill keening screech. The thick lupine tail wrapped around her thumped a few times against her hip as a cold snout pressed into her side with a whine.

Then, suddenly, the sound just stopped.

Bella's head jerked up at the same time she whipped around to the building across the scruffy yard of this little enclave. Sam had carried her out into the misting rain and set her down under a little group of trees behind the boathouse. He must have snatched up her abandoned flannel on his way out, because while Bella was desperately trying to gasp air in her lungs and swallow her racing hert, his shaking hand had ripped it into a makeshift bandage to try and stop her arm from bleeding. All while crouched beside her, shamelessly nude.

Neither of them gave a damn.

Then, with a mumbled apology, he'd promptly stepped back and phased. The big black wolf had fallen on his belly and shuffled forward, frantically sniffling over every inch of her with distressed whines while she tried to soothe him. But at the first ear-piercing shriek (of many) from the building by the lake, Bella had stiffened in fear and Sam had shed his distress to curl protectively around her with a soothing lupine rumble.

Truthfully, she wasn't sure if Sam was staying wolf to keep the Pack in the loop, or because he couldn't change back but it hardly mattered. He smelled warm and comforting, like home and Pack, and she'd take that right now (anytime, really) in any form.

Her hands feathered deeper into the wiry fur as she sat up straighter, unblinking eyes trained intently on the door.

When it opened, Bella shot to her feet taking several stumbling steps before the world keeled and spun. An agile furry back was suddenly in front of her and she fell face-first into a wiry pelt as her hands scrabbled for purchase. The big animal, shimmied around her, somehow shepherding her back to her knees on the grass with his body again wrapped around her.

Bella shook off the dizziness.

"Dad!" she gasped, blinking out to where Paul was carrying him toward her. Her father was squinting at her from a face contorted in pain.

Bella scooted over to make room in the warm grotto of wolf, while she anxiously watch the big man gingerly lay her father beside her.

"Oh, dad," she whispered worriedly as he laid back into the fur with a pained grimace. Her hands hovered nervously over him as her eyes frantically searched for damage.

Charlie groaned and Bella's attention snapped down to his right leg where Paul's hands were gently rearranging it so that it was laying out straight. Her gaze returned to his face and she smoothed her palm over the sweat beading across his forehead. Other than a scrape on his cheek, there were no other visible signs of damage.

"Oh God, Bells…" her father rasped, his hand reaching up to grab her own. He brought it down to his chest while his bloodshot eyes flitted feverishly over her face. "I'm _so sorry_, baby… so sorry."

"Dad, there's nothing th-" Bella's words stumbled over her tongue as warm brown arms slithered around her waist from behind. She glanced over her shoulder to see Paul scooting toward her on his knees, eyes closed and grief etched into his features.

Bella's other hand automatically flew to his arm as he slowly pressed his face into her shoulder. Like when Sam had gathered her to his chest in nothing but a tank top, the skin-to-skin produced a decidedly chemical reaction - like an intravenous tranquilizer - and Bella sighed softly.

Paul drew in a long shaking breath through his nose. His entire body was trembling.

"You okay?" she whispered, squeezing his arm.

Paul nodded wordlessly against her.

Bella returned her attention to her father – his leg was obviously fractured badly. "Dad, where else are you hurt?"

"Just a few cracked ribs, I think," her father whispered, his eyes alert and trying to memorize her every pore. "God, I was so proud of you."

Squeezing his hand, she bit her lip as tears welled up at the mere thought of what had just happened.

"Your arm okay?" he murmured, holding up their clasped hands as his gaze swooped down to the oozing flannel bandage. She was still losing blood.

Bella wrinkled her nose. "It's going to need stitches. Y'know… me… with knives. Bad combination," she laughed weakly.

A sad smile made his mustache buckle and his eyes darted back to hers. And held them.

"I love y'baby," he breathed. "So much."

Hot tears welled up, blurring her vision like a soft-light camera filter on this harsh, crazy world. She brought her father's hand up and pressed her lips to his knuckles for a moment. Sniffling soggily, she let their hands fall to her thigh.

"Love you too, dad." The words hiccupped over the rising sobs she was trying so hard to suppress. "Jake?"

A dark look she'd never seen before slipped over his face like a shadow. "He's finishin' up," he bit out, his voice hardening in the baritone he used at work.

Bella nodded, glancing worriedly at the boathouse.

"C'mere, baby," her father whispered, tugging on her hand.

With an apologetic squeeze to Paul's arm, she scooted over to lean back against Sam's big barrel chest and lowered her cheek to her father's shoulder. He leaned his head down against hers with a shaking sigh.

Her eyes darted up to where Paul was watching her with heartbreaking eyes. "C'mere," she whispered, stretching out an inviting hand.

The big man hesitated just a second, before he scooted forward and lowered his head to Bella's lap. With a sad smile, her fingers stroked tenderly through his jet-black hair while a thick wolfy tail settled over his side.

And they waited as the world wept around them and mist rose up off the lake.

After several minutes – to no cue she could fathom - Paul sat up, placing a protective hand on her shoulder as she sat up too. Bella's eyes snapped out to the building just as the door banged open.

Through it strode Jacob – tall, muscled, powerful – with feral wildness still sparking and oozing from incandescent eyes like magma. Broad shoulders heaving, his skin was slick with sweat like melted caramel poured over muscles excised and twitching with residual rage.

"Jake," Bella gasped quietly.

That savage gaze focused like a knife on her mouth and he cocked his head in that way he did when instinct had overrun its bounds.

Bella glanced down at her father, torn.

He squeezed her hand. "Go to him, Bells," he whispered.

Bella pulled her lip into her mouth and then whipped around, standing at the same time. Paul's hand steadied her at the small of her back as blood loss and trauma conspired to bring her back down.

And then she was running.

She'd barely made it ten feet before strong arms were sweeping her up off her feet and pulling her tightly against a sweaty chest. Wrapping her legs around him, Bella dove into his neck as sobs finally shook free.

She felt the descent.

The heavy impact with the ground was jarring as Jacob fell to his knees, clasping her tightly to him. Bella just pressed her face into his skin all the fiercer, while emotion gushed forth like blood from a wound and her tears joined his salty sweat.

But shaking hands were suddenly at her jaw, firmly pulling her back. Bella barely had time to see the torment etched into his features before his mouth was on hers, smothering her weeping and ravenously devouring her anxiety whole.

His hands tangled in her hair, pressing her into a fervid kiss that tasted of heat and desperation. Harsh, demanding, his tongue laid claim to every inch of her mouth carving out her residual fear and swallowing it down with ardent grunts as unapologetic palms tipped her head back and forth so he could consume every last inch of her.

Bella's hands had frozen with overwhelm on his shoulders, but now they smoothed over the jumping muscles soothingly while she reached out to him with her mind.

With a grunt, he shook his head brusquely against her, preserving the covetous play of his lips and hands and she withdrew. She understood: he didn't want to show her how he burned.

When he had siphoned off all her distress and gotten his fill of her mouth, he started marking her face with frenetic little kisses that bloomed with little flicks of his tongue. A soft whine pooled in the back of his throat as he snuffled and smacked over her skin while her lips curved at the sheer bliss of just being in his arms. He nuzzled under her jaw and then lapped his way down her neck to his exposed mark.

With a soft hitching sigh, Bella instinctually tipped her head in surrender.

He massaged the bruise – that wasn't sore like one - with teeth and tongue and Bella gasped at the wave of sensual energy that washed over her. She was pretty sure it would have made her cum, if she weren't so aware of her two Pack mates and father.

Like it took monumental effort, Jacob tore his mouth from her skin and pulled her cheek to his chest with a fervent hand. Bella closed her eyes, squeezing him tightly. Palm at the back of her head and arms wrapped tightly around her, she felt him rock forward as he stood.

"Torch it."

The clipped edict rumbled under her cheek, sounding still closer to a growl than Jacob's human bass. Her body swayed gently with his smooth stride and then he was lowering himself back down to the ground.

Bella's eyes popped open and she lifted her head as his hand slipped down her back. Turning, she saw they were kneeling beside her father who had been laid back on the ground. Wiping her nose with the back of her hand she sat up more, trying to disengage herself with a chagrinned glance at her father.

Jacob's arm tightened its hold as his eyes cut over to her with a peevish growl that curled his lip.

But her father hadn't so much as glanced her way – he was watching Jacob with liquid eyes that had shamelessly leaked down his weathered cheeks.

Charlie's hand reached out and Jacob clasped it firmly as he steadily returned the man's stare.

"_Thank you_, son," her father whispered, tears and pain roughening his voice. "You' always been a son to me, Jake. Y'know that, right?"

Jacob nodded infinitesimally.

Bella bit her lip against resurgent tears, and collapsed onto Jacob's shoulder as she watched the two men continue the conversation silently through their locked gazes.

A whooshing roar rose up behind her and her head jerked up, turning to where Paul and Sam were pouring out canisters of boat fuel along a wall already engulfed in flame.

"Leah killed him."

Jacob's cryptic words had her whipping back around to where her father was still clasping hands with her mate. "The witch got away but they're all gone for good," his words were clipped and trolling the gravelly deep; he hadn't completely surfaced from the lake of fire

Charlie nodded with a shaking breath.

"The Pack's almost here with the truck," Jacob rumbled. Her father needed to get to the hospital… both of them did.

As heat rose up behind her along with the crackle of flame, Jacob pulled his hand free and brought it to her father's chin. Gently he tipped her father's face toward him a little more and the man's gaze darted to his daughter in confusion.

"It's okay, dad. He's going to help you," she whispered giving him a reassuring smile as she settled her cheek against Jacob's shoulder again.

"Charlie, look at me," Jacob breathed, low and hypnotic and Bella could feel his core heat surge along with the prickling energy around her.

Swallowing thickly, the man met the wolf's gaze and then blinked.

She watched her father's pupils widen with his open mouthed gasp and he arched up off the ground. Slowly he settled back down as his lids drooped heavily. With a sound blink, Jacob released him and her father's lids drifted closed – finally blissfully unconscious to all the pain.

Jacob's hand left her father's chin to smooth over her head. She turned her cheek up so she could watch his face as he gently stroked over her hair. His eyes stared over her head, the reflection of the flames replacing luminescent lupine heat.

"It's over, Bells," he whispered, keeping his gaze fixed on the pyre. "It's the end."

With a bittersweet smile, she sat up. Stroking the hairs at the nape of his neck, she patiently waited until Jacob met her eyes. Leaning in, she brushed her lips over his with tenderness and devotion and then pulled back, watching humanity bleed back into his eyes.

Bella tipped her head as her lips hitched up in a slow, lopsided smile.

"It's just the _beginning_, Jacob Black."

'

* * *

'

_Review if you like. _

_. _


	23. Beginnings

Sappy and idealistic, it's got more plot info and "vibe changes" than a normal epi should, but it's always been how I see it playing out so I thought I would share. Not sure if the technique works either – unfolding timelines all linked together? Think "nested Russian dolls."

If you want the full "movie effect" I see in my head, queue up the song "Kryptonite" by Three Doors Down – but don't play it yet. The opening song below is one of my faves from Coldplay – We Never Change

Enough Blab.

'

* * *

'

Thanks for reading and hope you enjoy.

'

'

_So I wanna live in a wooden house._

_I wanna live life,_

_always be true._

_Yeah I wanna live life,_

_and be good to you._

_I wanna fly, and never come down._

_And live my life,_

_and have friends around._

'

**Beginnings**

'

Fuck, she tasted so good.

Jacob picked her up with an arm under that delicious ass while he devoured her whimpers.

"Need," Bella gasped, throwing her head back.

Jacob's mouth pounced on the column of her neck. "Whattaya need, honey?" he mumbled between bites and licks.

She answered him in a groan as his free hand rolled a straining nipple between his fingers while his other set her down on the hood of the Rabbit.

Heels clamped around his ass, she rubbed her crotch over his aching cock telling him exactly what she meant. It was Jacob's turn to moan against her racing pulse. Fuck, he could feel the heat through her shorts, through his straining jeans.

Oh, he _needed_ too. Something fucking fierce. Like always

Bella tipped her head down and captured his ear between demanding teeth, sending a sensual lightning bolt through his body. Chill bumps raced over his skin cumulating in incinerated balls.

"Gimme, Jake," she breathed in his ear, soft, seductive.

Lupine anticipation howled through his bones and he shuddered. His mate's arousal hung heavy in the air like a honeyed fog. She was ripe, wanting, _begging_ for him to take her.

He couldn't stand anymore.

Pulling her from the hood of the car, he turned her around in his arms. She purred in approval as she tipped her head and leaned back into his hungry kisses down the side of her neck. One arm wrapped around her slender waist as the other tugged her shorts down. She wiggled her hips, helping him and driving him crazy at the same time.

His hand took a moment to smooth over that pert round ass, groaning into her neck in utter bliss. _Fuck he loved her ass._

His hand slipped around front to the heated slick evidence of her need and his middle finger automatically found that magic button.

Her cry rose up to the rafters of the old garage while her fingernails tattooed it his forearm. "Jake!" she shrieked.

Taking a step forward, Jacob readjusted his arm around her, slipping his hand across her chest to her shoulder so she was supported in a tight embrace while he nipped along her jaw. He leaned them both over the hood of the Rabbit as his free hand flew to his cutoffs. Urgent fingers fumbled with the top button and then with a growl of impatience, ripped open his fly with the tinkle of zipper teeth across the cement floor.

His erection was swollen and throbbing as he guided it to the place it would be 24/7 if it were humanly (or otherwise) possible. With a grunt, he buried himself to the hilt in one firm stroke. Bella hands slapped against the hood with a metal thunk, as she arched back against him with a gratified gasp.

Jacob's hand smoothed possessively up her side while his hips tested the waters with slow priming strokes. His palm smoothed over her forearm with contrasting tenderness on its way to brace against the car beside her own hand.

"Ready, Bells?" he whispered in her ear.

She gasped an unintelligible mumble. Jacob's lips curved while his cock slid slowly in and out of her slick heat – he liked that he could make her lose her mind like this.

Biting his lip, Jacob let his craving off its leash.

And started fucking his mate.

Buffering her body against the metal with his arm, Jacob pounded his need into her body with abandon. He slammed his hips into that soft, full ass and felt her breasts jiggle against his arm while she groaned in shameless pleasure.

Over and over he thrust into her body as she arched into him with breathy pants of his name, egging him on. Each plunge stoked the flames higher and higher, their scorching need fusing them together. She was made for him – the way she felt, the way she tasted, the way she smelled. Never did he feel as whole and at peace as when he made love to her whether it was slow, sensual worship or unfettered carnal desire.

Like now.

His name disintegrated on her lips in a throaty groan as Jacob caged his growls behind gritted teeth and he pumped the pressure up to unbearable heights with stuttering hips.

Slamming into her, she cried out and her body bore down. The world exploded and he ripped her shirt from her shoulder…

And Jacob sunk his teeth home.

Bella's gasp had Jacob's eyes popping open just enough time to dive across the kitchen and catch the bowl of salad greens plummeting to the floor with handy reflexes.

Straightening, his gaze darted to Bella where she was frozen with round saucer eyes. He tried to smother his amusement at her expense – rather unsuccessfully – and his laugh came out in a snort. (It was a pretty funny expression.)

Giving him a bland look, even while a blush rushed to her cheeks, Bella turned back to the counter and started chopping tomatoes with a stubborn purse of her lips.

Jacob chuckled softly as he set the bowl down on the counter. Slipping his hands around her swelling waist, he stepped into her body, pointedly pressing his erection into her back and smiling at her soft gasp. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the side of her head. Her arousal smelled like seven kinds of heaven – she'd enjoyed that little fantasy too.

"Oops," he whispered impishly by her ear. "Did I think that out loud?"

Bella tried to twist that smile into a frown as she shrugged a coy shoulder against his smacking kisses.

_She was going to make him work for it, huh? _

He snuck in a well-placed tickle and finally those giggles burst free. With a smile, Jacob's arms wrapped back around her ripening Belly as he settled his chin on the top of her head and waited for her laughter and embarrassment to fade. It had been three years since they'd sealed the imprint and their sexual relationship – along with everything else - had matured quite a bit. But he still found her blushes adorable.

He hadn't meant to let that little fantasy slip (that was a replay of that night on Billy's kitchen table, but a different location), but it was just so hard to keep up his boundaries around Bella. When he was with her, it was the only time he could really just be himself outside the constraint of duty.

Whether he was reaming a wayward wolf, changing an alternator, or meeting with a Council of crotchety old men Bella was his solace and his kryptonite. She made him crave her body with an insatiable hunger that crouched ready and ravenous in his groin. The slightest hint of her scent, the touch of her hand, the brush of her mind… he was undone.

Even though she had fundamentally changed not only him, but his Pack in three short years, as Alpha of a Pack of shape-shifting wolves who needed tight reins, Council member, and future Chief of his tribe, there was a certain level of restraint, decorum and dignity that they both would just have to learn to live with. But she was helping him figure out how to draw those lines without bifurcating his heart.

Truthfully she made it easy.

Because he could endure all the bloodsucking demons, whiny wolves, busted cars and boring Council meetings in the world as long as he got to come home to this:

_Bella_.

And soon their son too.

"On the _Rabbit_, Jake?" Bella laughed softly as she started chopping tomatoes again.

"Mmm hmm," he leaned back down, pulling her hair over her shoulder. "On the Rabbit," he crooned as he pulled her sweater to the side and lapped over his mark at the crook of her neck.

The knife fell heedlessly to the counter as she instantly melted in his hands with a sharp hiss of desire. A gratified lupine rumble rose up in his chest he provocatively pressed his erection into that delicious ass.

She wore his mark and it was incredibly satisfying, even though it had scared the shit out of him that night he'd lost it and finally bitten her like instinct so ardently demanded. No matter that they'd both cum so hard they'd nearly lost their minds, he'd felt like a monster.

It was _Bella_ who – chin lifted stubbornly in spite of literally crimson cheeks – had fearlessly asked his father what it meant. On that Sunday morning, they'd had to face what they'd both ignored for as long as possible: the impossibility that at least part of who they were was a legend incarnate.

Since Taha Aki had lost his human body and taken that of a wolf, he was more animal than the others and therefore the most savage warrior of them all. But all that feral power needed grounding so the Spirit had also given him the perfect mate to be bound to so closely that they shared eyes, mind and heart. The stories told how Taha Aki had marked his Third Wife and true mate in the way of the wolves. His father thought it was only natural that Jacob would too.

All Jacob knew was that it changed him. Settled him. As much as his mind rebelled against it, after marking her, it satisfied something deep and primal and he felt peace.

They never thought of talking about it after that - the Alpha and man in him rebelled at the constraints of the past – he wanted to write his own stories like any true warrior does. Bella said it didn't really change much about being Jake and Bells except show that practice made perfect: Jacob had chosen her _first_ this time and she had stabbed herself in the arm, not the heart to distract his mortal foe.

"We're already late," Bella complained in an unenthusiastic mumble as she turned in his arms and yanked his face down to hungry lips.

"So it doesn't matter if we're later," Jacob crooned, scooping her up and setting her on the counter beside the tomatoes so he could properly worship that mouth.

'

"How the fuck am I gonna survive without Starbucks?" Rachel passionately petitioned the iconic white paper cup.

"Learn to work a coffee maker?"

Rachel cut dubious eyes over at the man fluently yanking a Prius around the cliffs like it was a sport car and not a sissy hybrid. Josiah just gave her one of his broad and easy smiles that showed off perfect white teeth contrasting as strikingly as his eyes with his rich complexion.

"How 'bout you just move in on the Rez and be my personal coffee maker, Josi?" she batted her eyelashes.

The man made kick-ass coffee – it was one of the many things she was going to miss about rooming with her best friend. She'd met him at a Capoeira rondo at Berkeley years ago and they'd hit it off immediately (in spite of the fact that she was work-study/full-ride and he came from old-money Pacific Heights). Despite his family's wealth he was humble and with his good nature and relaxed vibe he was the perfect foil in a Capoeira spar or in real life for Rachel's hardened heart and hot head.

"Pay's not good enough," he murmured out of a sly smile as he returned those striking green eyes back on the road. And that was what she loved about him – he was laid-back, easy-going, but would pop you in the jaw good if you crossed him or one of his friends. It never got to that though – he had a way of subtly bending his unsuspecting victims to his wily will all while charming their fucking socks off.

She loved him to pieces.

But not like _that_.

Contrary to popular rumor – that neither of them bothered to correct – they weren't sleeping together… actually never had. It was something Rachel had certainly propositioned (several times) but Josiah had somehow refused in a way that had kept their friendship intact saying he always played for keeps and Rachel would have just broken his heart.

It was true.

Rachel wasn't ashamed of that fact in the least. She didn't have time for needy men and burdening commitments. She just wanted a pretty face, a nice dinner and a good lay. Then she'd conspicuously leave his phone number on the nightstand in the morning and go back to business as usual.

Josiah was the only constant in a fast life (but in all fairness, he had snuck in on her blind side) where she kept too busy to pay attention, too distant to care and basically looked out for number one (and Josiah, but he didn't count).

Unlike her twin (emphasis on the UN… they weren't identical in any way) she hadn't grabbed the first man who'd floated her way (on his surfboard) and frantically tried to reconstruct a home and family that had gotten ripped away when they were 17. Rachel unequivocally needed nothing and no one.

Except maybe Starbucks.

"Seriously, Jo, I mean maybe I should open one up in Forks or something. Wanna front me?" Rachel continued her impassioned lament for rocket-fuel and comfort.

"Aww, boo," he said softly like hot cocoa spiked with rum as a hand slipped over her stockinged knee.

_Uh –oh. That voice always meant trouble. _

"It's going to be a head-fuck, but it'll be good, Rache," he continued, glancing over at her and deconstructing her panic in a nanosecond flat. "You can tie up all these loose ends that've been dragging you down. And it's not forever. Just until your brother's wife has her baby."

Rachel closed her eyes as she readjusted her boots on the dash. She hadn't even come home for Jacob's wedding two years ago. She hadn't come home at all since she'd high-tailed it out of there at the ripe old age of 17. Truth is, she didn't know how to face it all. She'd left her brother when he was 10 with their disabled father – but it had just hurt so bad.

Her palms flew to her face. "I can't believe I'm doing this."

'

Paul pulled open the passenger door and leaned into the truck, taking a long indulgent inhale. Jacob had to cage his growl behind firm lips. He knew it was ridiculous – but it was just so fucking hard to keep himself under control these days.

"Fuck Bella," Paul purred, pulling back with a wry smile. "You bottle that shit and you'd make a mint."

"Um… it's kinda a niche market," Bella laughed. "And you guys certainly don't have the cash."

Jacob sat in the truck staring out the window peevishly as his hands gripped the wheel. Whether it was because his sister was coming home for the first time in a decade or whether he just hadn't gotten his fill of his mate this morning, he just wasn't in the mood to share today.

And make no mistake, he'd be sharing.

That's one of the reasons he'd had the team meet down at his dad's place instead of their house around the corner where the Pack hung out too fucking much as it was. Since Bella had gotten pregnant Jacob was pretty sure the entire Pack would be content to just sit around and pass her from lap to lap, sniffing her all day while they watched TV in his family room.

They'd waited until she'd turned 21 (well he was pretty sure it had been a few days before - she had smelled so fucking sweet) but the imperative to mate was as driving as every other instinct and, like phasing and imprinting and dominance and possession, there were some things that just weren't worth fighting even if he could find a _single_ reason why to ever want to. Smelling his scent growing roots in her own, seeing that glow to her cheeks and sparkle to her eyes, watching her body swelling with his child was by far the most satisfying experience of his life to date which - considering she was in it - was really saying something.

But it hadn't been this bad when Emily was pregnant – the wolves certainly reacted protectively to the scent of their sister carrying the Pack's cub, but their focus hadn't been so myopic. Leah thought it was probably something instinctual (when was it not?) about Bella carrying their Alpha's cub combined with the fact she was "den mommy" as Leah called her (and Bella slapped her for it every single time).

But what whatever it was, it was fucking grating on Jacob's last nerve. They were all what could only be called overprotective, especially Paul – which should have been completely understandable since he followed her around like a puppy anyway.

Except if the Pack were overprotective, Jacob was somewhere several miles past painfully, obsessively, _shamefully_ possessive.

But then his mate knew that.

'_Love you,'_ Bella's voice washed over his mind like a sea breeze and he turned just fast enough to catch her warm honeyed kiss on his lips.

And like she always was, Bella was patient, understanding, _kind_ even when he was being a big fat wolfy dork (as she loved to call him).

But she never let him get away with sulking too long.

Bella started pulling back with that laughing gaze, and his hand slipped up to the nape of her neck, capturing her just long enough to pull that knowing smile into his mouth's possession. After he'd turned that amusement to a gasp of pleasure, he swallowed it down along with the nectar of arousal that rose from her thudding pulse in her neck while he unapologetically laid claim to his mate in front of his Pack. They were used to it by now.

Especially these last six months.

Bella knew he was keyed up about seeing Rachel. But it was time for Jacob to mend this last broken part of a past that had been torn apart by secrets and shame. And for Billy to heal.

Rebecca had been coming home several times a year for two years now – it was Rachel's turn. Bella had been trying to get him to bring her back for a while now and the baby was perfect excuse.

Not that Billy was any trouble… he lived right around the corner and over the years the Pack had grown into a family that took care of their own. (That along with the fact that Tiffany Call was over at Billy's house more often than not these days – a long story).

Under Jacob's brave and relentless leadership secrets had become a thing of the past. They laid bared hearts and accepted the past to stand united facing a future together. All family now knew about the wolves, and conversely, all wolves now knew about their families.

"Bro, you gonna let her breathe or what?"

Embry's chuckle pulled a growl from Jacob's lips before he pulled his them from Bella's. She grinned past her mate to Embry's sly wink. For him more than anyone perhaps, this was a loaded meeting but that cashmere smile was completely easy and unfettered - sins of the past had been forgiven long ago. He now had that loving family, a kick-ass Pack who had his back and a wife he absolutely adored (and a secret that she and Jake wondered if he'd figured out yet).

"How long've you known?" he accused with a humorous frown.

_Finally he had._

Jacob's face changed from surly to sunny on a dime as turned more and clapped forearms with his brother. "How long's it been, Bells?" he glanced over his shoulder.

"Almost three weeks," she answered blithely turning and grabbing Paul's hand to help pry herself out of the car.

Angela hopped once before wrapping tentative arms around Bella, overly-careful of her swollen middle (if only she knew what she and Jake had been doing not 20 minutes earlier).

Bella squeezed her hard. "Congratulations," she breathed in her best friend's ear. They all got along like sisters with the younger girls, but she, Emily and Angela were thick as thieves.

"How did he know?" Angela pulled back and shoved her eyeglasses up with a brilliant smile.

"Alpha crap," Bella tapped her nose with a wink.

"What?" Emily asked as she stopped her descent of Jacob's childhood steps with little Dakota on her hip and the daddy's girl reached out in demand to her papa.

"I'm pregnant," Angela gushed.

Claire squealed like the little girl she still was and it was like a starting gun for the celebration. Every time the Pack came back together - which went double when it was she and Jacob, no matter how short the reprieve (in this case overnight he'd given the Pack to Leah so they could spend some time before today) - it was a fabulously chaotic and ebullient greeting like they hadn't seen each other in years.

Bella endured the usual subtle reconnecting touches and unapologetically brazen sniffs while she carefully kept the attention focused on Embry and Angela's good news. They were Jacob and her best friends (other than each other, of course).

"Yo, sis," a strong arm wrapped around her shoulder and she was pulled into Leah's saucy side. It was a Pack label that was about three months from being official. Her father and Sue Clearwater were tying the knot this summer – more new beginnings to celebrate.

"How you feelin'?" She leaned down and pressed a kiss to her temple. "Other than sore..." she chuckled wickedly.

_Leah_ obviously knew what they were doing 20 minutes ago (and all through the night). _Damn lupine noses._

Gagging on her embarrassment, Bella slapped uselessly at her arm while the wolf just grinned in triumph at Bella's blush.

But everyone froze at the low vicious growl scurried across the driveway. As one, all faces whipped around to their Alpha who was baring teeth at his Second, frozen himself in the middle of a high-five with Quil. Even the birds seemed to be momentarily at a loss for words.

But Leah handled it like the pro she was. "Simmer down, Chief," she drawled with a forced casual veneer. "You know I just mess with her 'cause I love her."

But her arm had subtly changed from cavalier to protective – their Alpha's mate's pregnancy was throwing everyone a little off these days, but they were all edgier than normal with the newest Pack member arriving. Rachel would find out about the wolves as long as Jacob felt she could keep the secret (like every family member)– a sad state of affairs when it was your own sister, but she'd been away so long.

Jacob's high-five with Quil seamlessly transformed into clasped hands as his face abruptly jerked over his shoulder. "Dad, they're here," he called absently toward the house.

But with the attention and tension instantly slipping lax to Jacob's wordless absolution, Leah leaned down and whispered by her ear. "And that blush is just too hard to resist," she laughed softly, pressing a tender kiss to her hair.

Bella was kind of the perfect irresistible foil for the dominants of the Pack. In Paul and Sam it manifested into a jacked-up protective instinct, but in Leah it translated into nothing but ruthless teasing. Leah never took it too far and Bella never took it personally except in that it really did show how much she both respected her and cared (and she knew she could take it… because she could).

"I can't freaking _wait_ until you imprint, Leah," Bella gave her a megalomaniacal evil laugh.

"Maybe it don't happen to bitches," Leah snorted, showcasing just a little of that insecurity. In subtle ways, Bella was the only one she let peek under that tough veneer - she knew Bella would never call her on it but give her what she needed anyway.

"Oh it's gonna happen," Bella laughed theatrically as she wrapped an arm around the woman's waist. "Otherwise I'm writing a personal complaint to the Great Spirit. I _need_ that fodder for revenge."

Leah sniffed a laugh, cutting her eyes down to her gratefully, before they snapped back up. All wolves looked out to the empty road at the same time, finally hearing what their Alpha's senses had beat them to.

A car glided quietly up the driveway with eerily nothing but the crunch of gravel. She could see Jacob's sister staring out the front of the car with wide eyes. Bella wondered how Rachel felt being greeted by a crowd of people (10 of them over 6 feet tall), but Bella hadn't so much as even thought about asking Jacob about it.

The Pack did everything important together, end of story.

Especially the hard messy stuff.

Bella glanced over at where Jacob was standing beside Embry and Quil and watching his sister tensely through the window – she could feel his mind silently entrenched with hers like they were holding hands.

They tried to keep physical distance as much as they could around the Pack because they each had their roles and "charges" as they called them – they meant different things to different people. Paul stepped up beside Bella as behind her she heard the screen door bang open and Tiffany rolled Billy out onto the porch.

The tension was suffocating.

The door opened, and a swede leather boot with pom-poms stepped out on the gravel. Rachel stood slowly, looking painfully uncomfortable, but also freaking awesome. Obviously playing on the nouveau hippie theme with a conveniently appropriate Native American spin, her shoulder-length hair was hanging in two braids with some rawhide threaded through them. From her copper make-up to her tight top under a leather vest down to an obscenely short mini-skirt (with dark stockings the only things making it anything approaching decent) she looked every bit the stylish hipster graphic artist from San Francisco that she was.

But in her eyes she just looked lost.

"Oh my God! You're driving a fucking pussy _Prius_?" Leah balked beside her with her usual caustic charm. (She and Rachel used to be best friends back in the day).

Leah and Paul could tear a leech apart without reserve or remorse, but they handled emotional stress the same way.

Badly.

However Rachel just smirked at her, seeming grateful for something familiar at least – Leah's bitchiness.

Bella heard a sharp intake of breath beside her and her gaze darted up to see Paul's brow crumple over stunned and horrified eyes. Bella reached out and grasped his hand in concern. He nearly broke her fingers in a death-grip.

"Long time no see, Lee-lee," Rache was saying. "And it's not _my_ car, it's Josi's," she snorted indignantly.

Bella tore her eyes away from Paul's panic-stricken face.

A tall man unfolded from the driver's side of the vehicle with the grace and poise of a panther. He was striking. Somehow even with green almond eyes that looked backlit in his tawny complexion and long curly hair pulled into a ponytail, he oozed masculinity in spite of flowing balanced features. He looked part Black, part Hispanic and a bunch of other things but 110 percent sure of himself.

Leaning an indolent elbow on the top of the car and cocked his head with slow silky smile. "Now I _know_ I didn't hear you call my car a pussy," he chuckled richly. "Cause I might have to take exception to that."

"Oh shit," Leah gasped as her arm slipped from around her shoulder to snap onto Bella's other hand like she was a drowning woman.

Bella's gaze darted up to see that she certainly was. Leah's eyes were as round as saucers and her lips were slowly mimicking them with her slackening jaw.

"MY FUCKING _SISTER_?!"

A roar gouged the spring afternoon, tearing every pair of eyes (but two) to the seething form of one Jacob Black in a murderous prowl across the driveway.

Bella quickly shimmied her hands free of two sets of stiff fingers and stepped in to do what she did best. She'd intercepted him two strides and placed her palm over his jackhammer heart. Instantly his body froze, his muscles shuddering under her fingertips.

"Hey, honey," she whispered, as she brought soft calming memories up to the front of her mind. "We stick together. This is just another thing we're doing together, right?"

Her fingers slipped up to his jaw and heated eyes snapped down to hers as she replayed this morning's lovemaking as a (very effective) distraction until he got hold of the beast.

_His arm slipping around her rounded body, _

_Gentle hands cupping full, heavy breasts _

_As he entered her from behind. _

_Slow sensuous thrusts that made her shamelessly moan._

_Low laughs in her ear at how the baby kicked back…_

Jacob's groan made Bella's eyes snap open.

He was staring at her with wide eyes just outside their bathroom, his hands frozen in the middle of toweling his long hair.

Bella's smile turned sultry. "Sorry, was I thinking that out loud?" she arched a knowing brow.

"Mm hmm," he hummed, readjusting the burgeoning and corroborating evidence to that fact through the towel around his hips.

Her breath caught with the erotic shiver went through her body and he gave her that roguish grin she loved. If anything it looked even more boyish in the deepening lines of his face.

"If you don't stop it we're going to be even later," she chided playfully as she stood up from the couch and wagged the brush in her hand meaningfully. This day was really the first beginning for them as a _couple_.

Today Jacob was stepping down from his position as Chief of the Quileute Nation and Head of the First Nation Assembly of the Americas.

"I'm pretty sure you started it, Bells," he chuckled, rubbing his hair a little more before letting the towel drop to the floor.

He crossed the room, the water glistening on musculature that was still tight and toned. Anyone would be shocked to think he was a day over a fit and fabulous forty-five… when he was really _seventy_-five. They both were.

And it was time.

For them.

Jacob leaned down and pressed his warm, freshly shaven lips to hers and she sighed softly. His palm reached to her waist to steady her – after all this time his touch still made her weak in the knees. That hand slipped down with a naughty pinch to her butt and she yelped.

Jacob chuckled and plopped unceremoniously down on the couch spreading both hands out over the back.

Bella ran a palm lovingly over his bulging muscles and then over the tattoo on his shoulder. That first year that the Pack had really starting coming together they had all gotten one – imprints included. Emily had designed it in the Quileute style. Even if tattoos weren't part of Quileute technical cultural inheritance, it still made more sense than something like… matching team Jacob shirts (said with a gawky laugh by Quil more times than she could count).

But the point was that they were one team, one family, one Pack.

And they'd stood beside one another through it all: human secrets, shattered hearts, healing minds, broken bones, mending bonds… the many flavors of rebirth in all their many seasons.

"Sit up a bit," Bella murmured, tugging at the long silken flow of salt and pepper stuck between his broad shoulders and the couch. He did and she pulled the nearly waist-length locks free, her eyes snagging like usual on the deep jagged scar that zigzagged down the smooth caramel of his back like lightning.

She'd almost lost him.

Jacob's hand slipped up cannily to capture hers as he sat back. "It's over, honey," he whispered and then brought her fingertips to his lips.

Bella closed her eyes as she bit her lip and nodded brusquely to reassure _herself_ more than anything. It wasn't the first time they'd thought it was over.

"Shhh…" he soothed, turning around as his lips trailed a penitent trail of kisses up her arm. "It's really over this time."

Bella sniffled and then opened her eyes to his worried amber gaze. It had been less than a year that he'd worn that scar. After the injury at the end of the Great Volturi War that had nearly taken him from her, he'd stopped phasing… for the second time.

"Do you want this, Jacob?" she asked quietly.

Jacob's brows knit as his eyes paced intensely between hers. He understood how much her heart had bled over those long months of recovery (and years of frightened worry before).

"Am I sick of watching our friends grow old while we stay the same? Do I think it's time for me to leave Councils and Wolves and Wars to our grandchildren… our _great_-grandchildren?" he whispered and then paused, enunciating each word. "Do I want to spend the rest of my life enjoying a little peace with my imprint...

My _wife..._

My _best friend_?"

Bella bit her lip as her eyes burned. Jacob pressed a kiss over her lifeline and then turned into her hand.

"You _know_ what I think," he breathed, nuzzling her palm. "What do I want more than anything, Bells?"

Bella tried to catch her rising sobs with pursed lips. It was an emotional day.

"Me," she mouthed soundlessly.

"Don't you think I've waited long enough?" Jacob whispered.

Bella cocked her head as she stroked her fingers over his cheek. He looked as handsome, distinguished and regal as his father had at this age (well, this physical age, not the technical one). His eyes could be fierce or loving, his brow intimidating or empathic, his mouth severe or sensual – lips lifted from canines in a vicious grimace or curved up in a sunny smile. He could be loving husband, tender father, ferocious Alpha, doting _grandpa_, stern Chief. But in all of his many iterations, there could be no mistake: this man was a warrior.

And her very best friend.

She loved him beyond the bounds of the human heart. Still impossibly more every day… and there'd been many days. It was a gift from the Spirit befitting his burden – when he was phasing and had stopped aging, she did too.

But he _had_ waited long enough. Both of them had.

"You have," she breathed, leaning in to kiss the lips she adored.

Bella pulled back, breaking eye contact as she gathered his hair in her hands and started pulling the brush through their shiny wet lengths.

Jacob watched her a moment with concerned eyes and then turned back around. She needed a few moments to reset.

And like every new beginning there were things to mourn as well. He knew how last year had shattered her life when he'd come back so victorious but so broken. They had both given their lives for their families and people… over and over and over.

His father's old stories had been right – Taha Aki's spirit _had_ returned in him to guide his people through turbulent times. Because these times had certainly been turbulent.

But he'd done it. Together with his mate.

Now the stories told around the campfires to squealing children and cuddling couples (by the shaking voices of his Pack, now grown from young and lost to old and wise) weren't about Taha Aki and his Third Wife. They were about Jacob Black and his imprint, Bella.

In other words, Jake n' Bells.

Jacob had stopped phasing the first time a little after thirty - like most of the Pack - so they could grow old together. The original ten had already put in more than their time and their children and others had started phasing already. The Pack had grown to twenty because of all the wars they'd fought.

The Cullens had of course returned to cause trouble along with other covens who grew bolder each day. Like the changing human world that tried to suck the life out of love with greed, materialism and selfishness, the vampire population grew along with that cancer too.

But by 45 Jacob as Chief had succeeded in forming alliances with other First Nations worldwide who remembered magic and the old ways. The world had started subtly shifting. In a good way.

In fact, they had thought they were home free: the Cullens were no more and every vampire on the planet knew the rules they'd set down (and to stay the fuck a million miles away from Washington State).

But like the spirit he carried had had to do before him, only several years later, the Volturi declared war. Jacob had been the only one of the original Pack strong enough to return to the wolf even at the ripe old age of forty-nine.

So he could lead and protect his people.

And the next twenty years had been nothing but leadership, strategy, alliances and war.

He'd nearly been killed when years of plot, intrigue and tactic had culminated with him _finally_ infiltrating Voltura...

Where he'd taken out the fucking head of the proverbial snake once and for all: _Aro_.

He was a very old and powerful vampire and it had almost cost Jacob everything to kill him (again). Everything, meaning something he'd been looking forward to all of his life:

_time of his own with Bella. _

Oh, they'd had more seasons of fun and bliss than most on the planet, raising four children with the best friends and family and Pack anyone could have. But those days had also been riddled with duty and fear and keeping as many steps ahead of the enemy as humanly (or otherwise) possible every second of the fucking day.

Now it was time for _them_.

Their bodies were strong, their minds sharp (and Bella still got carded at the Seven-11 convenience store). Like most gifts there were things to mourn as well: passing family, old friends, older memories.

But now it was _their_ time… _theirs_.

With a soft satisfied sigh he leaned back and relished the feel of his mate's tender fingers braiding his hair with love. He smiled as the wind-chime on the porch tinkled over Bella's soft tuneless hum. (That girl never could carry a tune to save her life.)

_Fuck, he was looking forward to this_.

He loved her past the bound of a human (and otherwise) heart. Impossibly more every day. And there'd been many days.

There could never be enough.

He felt her tie off the braid with rawhide and then slip the beaded sheath up its length. He'd brought his people into a new era – where First Peoples had power and purpose and pride again. Slowly, together they were changing the world back a little and making it safe from monsters of many kinds. He'd written _new_ stories and ones that would last for generations.

Jacob was proud.

"I'm proud of you too," a breathy voice fluttered over his ear, before delicate teeth sent shivers down his spine to settle in his balls.

_Holy shit, just her touch…_

"Mmm… what about my touch, Jake?" she murmured sexily in his ear and then nipped the lobe.

Unlike those young innocent years, she knew exactly how much she affected him. Lucky for him, she'd always used her powers for good.

Jacob wished he could say the same.

With supernatural reflexes – and gentle human hands – he had pulled her over the back of the couch and into his lap.

"Lemme show you what I mean, Bells," he growled softly, capturing that smile between hungry lips.

He kissed her breathless and then trailed hot ardent want purposefully over her jaw.

The first of what would be many moans rose up in the back of her throat. "Jake, we're already late to the _Council_," she mumbled in a valiant (but feckless) attempt to stop the inevitable.

"So it doesn't matter if we're later, huh Bells?" he mumbled over her skin before Jacob's mouth found his mark and shamelessly carved a deep luxuriant groan from his mate's lips.

Bella arched ardently in his arms and he used the opportunity to rip the towel from between them as he flipped her over on the couch and pushed her dress up. His heated gaze darted over that beautiful face, the lupine fire that would forever run through his veins cataloging every last pore of his prize. Her eyes had lit and were burning with inarticulate want. He loved that he could make her lose her mind like this.

Still.

His fingers unerringly found her panties and had them ripped in two in a millisecond.

Bella's hands slipped up and tried to yank his face down by his freshly braided hair. "Need," she gasped.

Jacob's lips hitched up in a dark wry smile as he lowered his mouth to her petition.

"Crave," he growled.

'

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_**Aaaannnnnddd…..Hit the Song (Kryptonite) and Roll the credits folks** _

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_Mahalo nui and hugs to tayjayfan for prereads and support'_

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_Many thanks to that beautiful mind Tgat_

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_Smooches for the epic reviews and crazy-awesome convos by Yemonja'_

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_Many thanks to Jacob Black n Pack for their support and props '_

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_Much love to the kind and thoughtful reviewers/readers in the Tricky Raven Community '_

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_Sloppy, wet, wolfy kisses to kick-ass visual artists that feed the imagination like jaw-droppingly amazing work done by Nikitajuice, West Coast Angel, xcgirl08'_

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_Love readers and regular reviewers across fics… I'm not going to be able to get back to you personally like I planned but hopefully you understand. I'm so fortunate to have such intelligent, thoughtful, insightful minds to be among mine: (to name a few)_

_alh1971, Angel of the Night Watchers, AngelOfDeath07, Beaches of La Push, Bluee, chibi moon baby, ChrissiHR, dkamehameha, Dottyanne, Drasamuel, Echo58 , Frekles, ilovfanfic, Interbabe, jacobsgirl007, Januarylady, JaspersSweetie, Jdonovan09, Jeniesethebeast, jharv241, jurodgers, KerryH, kitty2lion, kkcnelson2002, kouga's older woman, LackOfImagination, LCB, LJ Summers, Maxsmomma, megan39, mharrison9101, misscoolgirl, Missyok, Mrsgee, MusicTwilightLove_ , _Norah Pearly-Gates, northern sunstone, PastOneonta, Pichon, rasheedah2907, SheSaysSo, sweetdreams1, TaycobLove, TeamJacobYeah, Toalli, tunde-tre, Twimam LaHote, wasnotthe1, xHappyHardcorex, Zayide, (And many more I missed because it's super-late)_

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_Best wishes, health and true love to each of you and thank you for all your encouraging notes along the way._

_Thanksfor reading and hope you enjoyed. _


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